cutiehulk

[cutiehulk]

Happy Birthday tumblr friend! I hope you have a lovely day - from afar, I am so proud of you for putting one foot in front of the other every day. You are wonderful!

Sorry for the late response!

Thank you for the kind message! ❤️

YOU are wonderful!

[cutiehulk]

#5 mistakes in the word 'sad'

[cutiehulk]

Hate my life

Hate my body

Hate my shyness

Ughhhhh

None of what I do matters

#everything is so meaningless #how much do I have to suffer here #hate my life with burning passion #crap bullshit pathetic life #kill meeeeeeeeee kill meeeee i don't want to live anymooooooore #ughhhhhhhhhhhhhh #AaAaaaaaaaaaaaa

[cutiehulk]

.

#sad... #again #hurts inside

[cutiehulk]

came across one of your posts. idk what you go through or in which country you live. but i just want to say that i had such negative thoughts in the past, for a year. i was crying every day and was thinking that i can't go through every day feeling this way anymore.

one day i read somewhere that "you can choose to be happy or sad" and i thought "how stupid, if it was that easy everyone would be happy". then i decided to try it. i said to myself "you won't label yourself as depressed or hopeless or sad, you will focus on what you have to do and ignore that burden of sadness". i started doing everyday things this way. that feeling of sadness used to return at night when i was overwhelmed from trying to avoid it all day and i would cry. until that sadness stopped coming back. it's been 2 years. there are times when i cry like everyone but i don't feel that burden. it sounds easy but it wasn't. but it wasn't impossible as well.

what i want to say is that many things are not a choice and we are forced to accept them, but many things are a choice. we can choose how we deal with things. you're still here for a reason. find a goal and follow it. whether it is to make people's days better with a compliment or volunteering, study something you love, make a plan on how to leave your country, build a life elsewhere, anything. we can do anything if we try to overcome the restrictions that others or ourselves create. i believe in you! i believe that you can make a difference in this world and you're here for a reason. sending you love! be hopeful and stay safe please 🧡🧡

Wow... Thank you very much! For this beautiful message and for believing in me! You described exactly how I feel.

I'm trying to find a goal, a meaning, I fail. A lot. But I will try again. Thank you again for kind words! ❤️❤️❤️

[cutiehulk]

I have bought the office advent calendar! Love them!

[cutiehulk]

Why people who support this dictatorship live in free countries for decades and go on the rallies saying 'our president is so cool!!!' but I have to live here. Of course it's them who enjoy their lives.

#what a life #I'd love to live in Canada too

[cutiehulk]

May I not wake up tomorrow please

Please

[cutiehulk]

May I not wake up tomorrow please

Please

[cutiehulk]

.

#next monday is gonna be very difficult #about to have a huge amount of suicidal thoughts #whatever i will do to stay positive will be pointless #why wasnt i born in normal country #fucking hate this pointless shitty life #just a piece of fucking crap

[cutiehulk]

My friend, all you post is your sadness. Get into the tags of something you love and get reblogging. Seek out joy. I've done the existing in sadness and it just makes it worse. I had to find my own joy and it SUCKED but it WORKED. Go find some cute Hulkenburg photos. Find gifs of your fav film. Don't let this just be a place for your darkness. You can show both sides.

Hi! Thank you for taking your time to message me!

I have been thinking about the answer for 3 weeks now. Still can’t come up with anything worthy but...

I can only say that I constantly fail to stay positive. My thoughts always come back to what I can’t have.

#i try and fail #try and fail #i'm ashamed by my inability to focus on something good #and each my failure is a disappointment

[cutiehulk]

When will it end when will it end when will it end when will it end when will it end when will it end when will it end when will it end when will it end when will it end when will it end when will it end when will it end when will it end when will it end when will it end when will it end when will it end

#🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫 #rope emoji #chair emoji #knife emoji #open window emoji

[cutiehulk]

May I not wake up tomorrow please

Please

[cutiehulk]

May I not wake up tomorrow please

Please

[cutiehulk]

May I not wake up tomorrow please

Please

[cutiehulk]

I must sleep. Sleep is the mind-healer. Sleep is the big-life that brings total ability to fucking do anything. I will face my bed. I will permit the blankie to pass over me and snores to pass through me. And when sleep has gone past I will turn the outer eye to greet the new morning. When the sleep has gone there will be everything. Energy and will to live will remain.

#same but without waking up

[cutiehulk]

May I not wake up tomorrow please

Please

#fuck me and my wishes