discoveringmyselfagain

[discoveringmyselfagain]

Rest easy sweet girls. 14 years as a family. Today we had to say goodbye. It’s so strange knowing they were our last dogs we will ever has as a family. Before everyone started making their own families. Thankful they started life together and we had the option for them to leave together in the arms of the person who loved them most.

[discoveringmyselfagain]

Did something super outside my comfort zone.

I inquired about a boudoir session with a local photographer.

I have about zero body confidence but I’m trying to think outside the box for ways I might start embracing the body I have now.

I don’t have to keep aiming to go back to being the emaciated 20 something. I can be a grown adult and embrace the body I have now.

I think. 🙃🙃

This could be fun right!?

[discoveringmyselfagain]

Love starting the day being so fat you break the zipper on your jeans.

Remind me why I shouldn’t resort to ED behaviors at this point?

I’m so done trying. I’d like to give up now.

[discoveringmyselfagain]

Healing is an interesting journey. Trying to hold space for myself and take to heart it’s okay not to be okay. Remembering is hard and that’s okay.

[discoveringmyselfagain]

Mostly slept through the night last night. 🙌🏻

[discoveringmyselfagain]

Wine for dinner. Yeah. Doing great. 🙃🙃

Food is unappealing and nothing sounds good.

[discoveringmyselfagain]

Repressed memories alongside reliving suicide attempts was not on my 2024 bingo card.

I am tired and unwell.

[discoveringmyselfagain]

people who only use conventional social media are so funny bc they’ll casually be like “can I see your tumblr??” are you Insane. this is no instagram or twitter. this is my vault of secrets

[discoveringmyselfagain]

I hate everything. Staying present is hard.

Talking about trauma before work…

[discoveringmyselfagain]

Talking about trauma before work…

#struggling #therapy #memories

[discoveringmyselfagain]

Excuse me while I hide in a corner.

Things from childhood are randomly popping up in fragments and aaaahhhhhh.

I’m questioning everything.

But can I talk about this in therapy.

I don’t know.

[discoveringmyselfagain]

Marathon training is over. 😭

[discoveringmyselfagain]

Marathon training is over. 😭

[discoveringmyselfagain]

All I want to do is engage in E.D. Behaviors and be left alone to my own self distructive vices.

#off for a run even though my body can’t handle it right now #feeling self distructive #I hate myself

[discoveringmyselfagain]

I hate my brain.

Why is living so hard sometimes?

I need to talk but obviously can’t reach out to anyone right now.

My alarm for yoga goes off in 4 hours.

[discoveringmyselfagain]

Booked a yoga class for the morning.

Can she be brave enough to go?

[discoveringmyselfagain]

Today is a struggle. Anyone want to do therapy for me today? I don’t want to cry again