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DM: You are the first member of TOTLB/Team Fuck Water to hit level 20

Pyotr: Finally! I hit my capstone!

#that's what happens when you plan out an invasion #separate yourself from the party #and have your big boss fight chronologically first #dnd quote #DM #CDC #scary queen arc

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"Pyotr fixed the mistakes of the party, as per usual"

#couldn't remember who said this #but lowkey could have been anyone #because it is very true #dnd quote #scary queen arc

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Pyotr: Last time I died I became part celestial and gained resistances. Now I've got fancy jewlrey

#aka the life and hate shards #dnd quote #CDC #scary queen arc

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Annahael: You die, you come back to life, you got two shards

#oh yeah remember the shards? #Pyotr just got two more #dnd quote #Annahael #scary queen arc

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Pyotr: I'm back!

DM: Pyotr is, begrudgingly, back

#shoutout to clerics with revivify #dnd quote #CDC #DM #scary queen arc

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Pyotr: Just stab, punch him in the nose, then turn to Fjord with a thumbs up like "Did I do good?"

#dnd quote #CDC #scary queen arc

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Pyotr: It only takes me dying for my dice to actually do something

#big mood #dnd quote #CDC #scary queen arc

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X: I know nothing about the planes

DM and Pyotr: There's the Hells, Pandemonium....

Annahael: Delta, Frontier, Boeing

#dnd quote #X #DM #CDC #Annahael #scary queen arc

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X: Can I slap her to do that?

DM: It is a melee spell attack

#dnd quote #X #DM #scary queen arc

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DM: Cool, anything else for your turn?

Annahael: I think you mean cool-aid?

#hi yes we love terrorizing the DM #don't worry it balances out #I think #dnd quote #DM #Annahael #scary queen arc

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DM: That is a level 40 character that should have one-shot all of you...and you turned him into a glass of Kool Aid...and disintegrated him

#DM #dnd quote #scary queen arc

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DM: That character took me literal months to make, and you turned him into a glass of Kool Aid and disintegrated him like that

#oh yeahhh #dnd quote #DM #scary queen arc

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*DM in utter chaos trying to understand how we got to this point*

Pyotr: Only because I killed one of his friends and used polymorph against him

#dnd quote #DM #CDC #scary queen arc

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*Annahael/Caleb gets the HDYWTDT on the BBEG (aka the polymorphed pitcher of Kool Aid) via disintegrate*

Annahael: I just go "Oh ja" and he just poofs into a bunch of Kool Aid powder

#dnd quote #Annahael #scary queen arc

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Party: Is the Kool Aid man the glass or the liquid?

#conclusion: his body is the glass and the liquid are his insides a la blood #which now me as I'm typing this out #is thinking if we consume the blood of the kool aid man #does that make him Jesus? #this conversation needs to be continued #dnd quote #party #scary queen arc

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DM: It was sunbeam

Annahael: Well now it's no-beam. Darkness, eternal darkness

Pyotr: Total eclipse of the heart

#dnd quote #DM #Annahael #CDC #scary queen arc

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DM: HE HAD 880 HIT POINTS! AND NOW HE'S A PITCHER OF KOOL AID!!

#dnd quote #DM #scary queen arc