drakatzenwritesabook

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They're having a 2 for 1 Who gives a Fuck special at the Shove It up your Ass store

#r

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can’t stop smiling in inappropriate situations

#f

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I'm kinda shy but if youre persistent in getting to know me for 5-6 years I can be a good addition to your household

#rav

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"no worries" ah but that is where you are wrong. there are many worries

#r

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obvs there is something great about when a Big Scary turns into a Big Softie where Tiny Useless is concerned, but what i like better is:

Tiny Useless decides, with no prompting and for no apparent reason whatsoever, that Big Scary needs protecting. and if no one else will do it then this accidentally-gets-stepped-on, blows-away-in-a-stiff-breeze motherfucker is going to have to be the one to protect this living mountain of pain. you wanna get to this troll, you’re gonna have to go through this pixie. you try to come for this tibetan mastiff, this chihuahua’s gonna try to kick your ass first.

and the Big Scary is mostly just?? really confused???? there are at least twenty different reasons why this is fucking dumb. but also this feeble lil shit is the first person in the entire world to try and stand up for this person that absolutely does not need it. Big Scary continues to be huge and terrifying but now Tiny Useless has their undying loyalty and it will probably not end well for anyone.

#r/rav #although describing ruark as ‘useless’ is inaccurate in pretty much any context #r #rav

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Earlier today I made a remark that wasn’t necessary

#r

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the sheer eroticism of a bloodstained blouse... effervescent.

#f #rav

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"it's okay, i can peel back the layers of you until i find the soft and gentle core of you you've had to work so hard to hide"? no. no, it's okay, i know you're hollow; i'm here anyway. you don't have to pretend it isn't masks the whole way down. whatever face you want to wear, i still love you. i don't need you to be good or unflinching or the antonym of violence. if i did, i wouldn't be here. i wouldn't ask that of you.

#f #f/rav

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slutty little men with slutty little waists and a tendency of getting covered in blood are my favorite, actually

#f #but not that little he’s 6’5

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#r

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they hate us control freaks for making sure everyone else does things the correct way

#r

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Once I finish killing this guy the cycle of violence will be over, trust me guys

#rav

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hate the phrase 'baked goods' just a reminder that all my baking fucking sucks. my baked bads

#rav

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well I would never turn away a woman who means me harm. come right in ma’am

#f

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if ur in a tough situation and don't know what to do immediately escalate to violence. follow me for more life advice ❤️

#rav

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#r

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I love you animal

#s