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So, after graduating it was like everything collapsed for me. I was relying heavily on art and trying to follow through with a project, but horrible fatigue and exhaustion had been a problem even more classes ended, and once I stopped being put under pressure, I just broke.

Well, I was just diagnosed with type 2 narcolepsy and live in a constant state of exhaustion. Suffice to say, I can't complete comics. I have a personal art blog @ps-aeiou-vowels where I plan on posting UTDR again soon, once I get over the guilt, but I had to come to terms with the fact that my health and disability render me quite unable to do something like this.

I plan on hopefully continuing the Canon from here, sort of, in my fanart some day, but mostly I just want to enjoy UTDR again without feeling crushed that I Couldn't Do This.

Not without lack of trying, but because I simply can't. (Also, I had severe anxiety when I first started this comic, and that's been heavily improved upon)

I learned a lot during the time in which I could update, and I thank everyone for the support.

I really hope to return to UTDR with a healthier outlook now that I'm doing better in some ways, like being able to accept my own disability. Thank you for everything.

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I've been rewriting and reviewing my notes for stuff (and have been practicing personal comics lately.)

Some thoughts:

I think if I were to redo this, I'd make Frisk(And Chara, when they fell) 10. My original point had been to emphasize underestimating/deciding how younger children feel, but tbh I'm not feeling that like I used to. Like, you can look at Lilo from Lilo and Stich, and know she has a completely developed personality and sense of awareness of the world around her, and she's supposed to be 5-6. But I think I aimed a bit too low with my intent.

And really, nobody is Stopping me from going and retconning whatever I want from My comic, it would just require me to cringe my way through old pages and answers and stuff and edit any mention of their age lol.

I probably need to do that anyways (go through the blog to jog my memory) but, ow. I kind of want to one day go through those and redraw them anyways, since my style and ability has evolved Incredibly far past that, so maybe I'll just make a note somewhere on the comic collection pages or whatever for now?

IDK I'm not a professional and I guess I can do what I want!! This is what I'm using for practice (and my own desire to create) anyways!

this would be easier to edit in changes for if I transcribed pages, however, I have 8 diseases. I Do want to try to do that more from now on, but they'd clog up pages IDK I'll maybe make a sideblog for the newer pages so I can put off feeling cringe for a little while longer lol

#mod talk #not story

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Are you ok or dead?

Not dead! As my more recent posts would indicate, I've gearing up to return to more serious kinds of work (including comic work, like this!) for a few months now, but I have like 5 separate medical conditions or something that all ended up making me genuinely crash physically and mentally at the end of my last school semester. Really, really bad kind of crash. I was extremely sick.

I've been slowly picking myself up and have spent some time reflecting on what I can and can't do and finally got some proper help with some of my neurosis irt certain Fandom stuff (in short, I've gotten a better handle on myself, and came to the conclusion about not caring about some things and not owing an explanation to anyone about others.)

I've been mostly reading/researching for comic stuff and game design the past few months. My biggest issue here has been that I tend to drag scenes out when I could compress three pages into one if I stopped trying to slow things down.

I can't really fix the pace of anything previously drawn, but I know I have a lot to learn in regards to comics, so by no means do I want to abandon this project. It's just been a matter of regaining basic functions instead of just finding time for comics.

Thanks for checking in :)

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boy is this place gonna see some housekeeping once I get myself back together (soon)

I'm finally dragging myself out of my little hole of "being upset about health issues" and trying to engage w/online things I enjoy again, which include this comic

You're going to see a massive boost in art ability and I've been poking at my script a bit and stuff etc

But first I need to really really edit these pages because there are some things I don't care about anymore and some things I don't owe anyone an explanation for wanting kept far the fuck away from me, etc. It's amazing what proper treatment does for someone. Less neuroticism, explanation, and more "I'll just get rid of you and move on"

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hi hello! I've been doing a bit better, I was diagnosed w some p awful stuff and have been slowly dealing with that and trying to stabilize my health. I am very very tentatively planning on returning in September, depending on how the next few months and stuff go. in the meanwhile, I'm figuring out ways to better handle stress and intense reactions to things, and will probably highly tone down some things like banners and shit. not that opinions have changed, I've just matured a lot while getting treatment and know how to handle things better

in the meantime, I'm on artfight, if you know me you know me

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hi, it's been a while

i just want to say that i'm still on hiatus, but not without due reason- i finally received a fairly severe/kinda devastating mental health diagnosis and am in the process of playing telephone tag until i can find a specialist who can tell me what the fuck is actually going on physically (i really don't want to go into detail on this blog, sorry)

i honestly don't know?? when i'll be back because right now i'm just trying to find that medicine cocktail that allows me to function and once again focus on an actual Project, but i'm spending my limited energy doing studies and practicing and so on. i've been working on revamping my original plans and making this story more compact, and i've frankly matured quite a bit since i started it, but it's something truly important to me (as is utdr) that i want to return to when (i don't wanna say if but. ugh) i can function again

#mod talk

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HELLO I AM ALIVE

I have something due on like Wednesday but that'll be it for the intense workload (also my laptop was broken and had to be repaired)

we will return when I get my life back together after an intense few weeks caused by horribly planned required school events and other hellish things <3 I'm also recovering from artistic burnout caused by those things and I'm angry as fuck about it. Staying off of Tumblr these past few weeks has helped me focus, so I'm glad

can't wait to be done with this fucking shit

#not story #mod talk

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sorry for no updates

sorry sorry ive been genuinely slammed and not on tumblr much at all because of midterms and im about to move schools and genuinely havent been able to work on this at all because i have no energy after school stuff and i am screaming SO much.

hopefully this will all calm down soon

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ohh... is chara intersex?

so, yes, that is what is being implied.

i have been hesitant to answer this because there are people- even within this fandom- who fetishize intersex people, even children, and i will not allow any probing or inappropriate questions towards the chara i portray because i know how some people are. this is a personal subject to myself and many others, and i will absolutely not fucking tolerate weirdness or nastiness towards this child, fictional or not.

this means i will not be saying a word past "chara is intersex." approach the subject with the same discretion as you would in real life. have some respect.

#it's been killing me that i can't work on this comic and like actually tell this story in pages at the moment #because i have to squeeze in drawing in between school and health issues #and i don't exactly control how much energy i have at every given moment. #or what will catch my attention #so i wanted to share some of my thoughts #not story #mod talk #mod answer

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ended up not being able to cram in pages in between everything else i was trying to cram in before this trip (that i don’t actually want to go on but-) 

so no update this week, sadly. i may talk a bit more about the last update in return, though but i’m hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

#not story #mod talk

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Doesn't touch repulsion refer to asexuality or am I mixing it and touch aversion up?

I always figured touch repulsion/touch aversion were the same thing. Honestly, I haven't actually heard of it used in reference to asexuality? Which is ironic lmao

Anyways, I just meant the autistic thing.

#not story #mod talk #kinda funny bc im ace

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oh two anons now have understood, and I appreciate the understanding as to why I don't want to blast things or discuss it in detail right now

#i dont want the wrong people to fixate on it #but also the person saying i did a good job showing without telling really made me happy thank you for letting me know :) #as ive said before #i am figuring out comics as i go #so i worry about writing and art esp bc i worry about quality of things given how my own health as been #idk it just really made me glad to be working on it

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Is Chara referring to being trans?

Nope.

#not story #mod talk #sorry for short answers but i dont want too much attention drawn to this #if someone puts two and two together then ill give the same short answer #i dont want gross people though so i am hesitant

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might add death or some tw to thatsst page but idk

I will update this new week but it will probably be short bc family stuff next weekend

#not story #mod talk

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Are the posters relevant to what Chara's saying?

Yes.

#not story #mod talk

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comic list

previous update next update friday!

the only sign used here is “hurt” for chara being hurt.

i’ve been weirdly both excited and apprehensive about this series of pages, but it’s very important to me. (also ive been stiff and art is hard lately but i’m working through it)

#EoR #undertale #undertale fan comic #undertale fancomic #utdr #undertale comic #undertale fanart

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first time drawing him

#deltarune fanart #ralsei #ralsei fanart #ralsei deltarune #utdr fanart