espytalks

[espytalks]

#espy talks #nothing matters really but i still wanna put this on my blog #espy promos

[espytalks]

Impulse bought myself a new hobby.

This bad boy was done in one whole evening, if you can believe it, and i took breaks.

#espy talks #ive been eying punch neeedle kits for a while now #because its visually similar to rug tfting #and i wanted to try the idea out cause the equipment for that is expensive #i wasnt expecting to go through the first one so quick #8/10 quick and i learned it quick but ohhh boy its gonna give me carpel tunnl if im not careful #itd be nice to get some stuff to make these as gifts though

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How the fuck do people sleep?? Its litterally impossible.

#espy talks #out of sleep aid and i cant relax

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My brother took bud to the vet today. He insisted he go alone, so i let him and i slept in.

Shouldnt have done that. Bud's gone, too, now, and i didnt even get to see him one last time.

#espy talks #its not fair that i wasnt there for that decision #but also my brother is very upset about this so i guess ill never get the chance to talk about it with him #i dunno what to do with all this dog food

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god, if i wasn't still peeved about the thing i ordered not arriving, this would be a no-fuckin-brainer, no regrets.

#espy talks #and yet... she calls for me #sirens got it easy gettin me to drown all they gotta do is show me this plush and i'm instantly throwing myself out to sea #i got more important things to spend money on but MAN i love her so much

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So we managed to reschedule and appointment for today. We're getting the meds sorted out right now (side note: vets are expensive?? It wasnt as bad as i feared but good lord)

Bud (the good boy) has a heart murmur, which is leeking fluid in his lungs. This is the biggest of many problems. It should be treatable with the medication we got for him.

He has a yeast infection in one of his ears (we got stuff for it) some fleas (being taken care of) and he definately has arthritis, which cant be treated very well right now because of the other meds. He also has cataracts, mostly in his left eye, and a growth on his leg thats honestly really not a big problem, but will need to be looked at eventually.

If everything goes well, we should be bringing him in for a checkup in a couple weeks. The vet seemed pretty optimistic, and he was very reassuring (anxiety was telling me that im a shitty pet owner and this is my fault for neglect.)

Im still really worried, but im more hopeful now than i was before. But also the heart leeking fluid in the lungs is how my mom died sooooooooooooo im gonna try not to think about that.

#espy talks

[espytalks]

Ive been very worried about my other dog, bud. Ever since lacy died, he hant been doing well. His arthritis is acting up really bad, he can barely get up and walk around.

We have an appointment for the vet next saturday, but im worried hes not gonna make it. I dunno how realisic my fears are, cause my anxiety's gotten worse since mom died, and its hard to figure out whats reasonable fear nowadays.

So yeah uh if you hear no updates by sunday assume everythings fine and i just forgot to say it.

#espy talks

[espytalks]

I tried to figure out a piece of a song without any tabs to follow. This is what i wound up with.

The camera refused to focus, so this is the best y'all're gonna get.

#espy talks #i cant remember if i had a tag for this #ill add it if i find it

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i missed the eclipse :(

#espy talks #well i guess i gotta live till 2045 or whenever it is #cause i really don't wanna die before i see one #odds are i'm not gonna make it far into my fifties though so i'm not banking on it

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ok so i got a reply, and they basically said "go call usps and see what they can do about it" so. I called my brother (he's been helping me through this) and he said this is a cop out, and they're not gonna do anything.

i just want a frickin refund at this point. I'm so tired.

it's been a week since i sent in a support ticket, and i havent heard back from makeship.

so! don't buy a darn thing from em!! I still don't have the frickin plushie i ordered, even though it says it's been delivered.

#espy talks #espy keeps talking

[espytalks]

hey, anyone else getting followed constantly by the same person? there's an account that keeps showing up in my notes, as if they're following, unfollowing, and following again after a while.

I'm starting to think it's some kind of weird new bot, but idk. it's been happening on two of my blogs. (i thought it was all of em, but it's just my main and art blogs)

#espy talks

[espytalks]

it's been a week since i sent in a support ticket, and i havent heard back from makeship.

so! don't buy a darn thing from em!! I still don't have the frickin plushie i ordered, even though it says it's been delivered.

#espy talks #i'm so tired #i took a risk cause i thought the design was really heckin cute #and they're so expensive for what they are #i'm really frickin bummed man

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i should stop taking naps after dinner.

I just had a frickin weird one, cause ive been playing a lot of suiika game and heldivers 2, of all combos, and i drempt i was calling in these tanks? and i kept dropping them on more tank things so they'd fuse and make bigger tanks.

There were a lot of enemies (cant remember what they looked like) and just? a lot of noise and gun firings, and they kept shooting down my tank thingies so i kept dropping more tanks, which i'd see from the same perspective as calling in reinforcements in the game, which wasn't as disorienting as it sounds.

i woke up when the chaos died down, and i woke up super relaxed, my dudes, which is weird because i hate guns and military-esque games, so by all means that shoulda been a nightmare.

#espy talks #my brother got us both copies of the game #cause HE likes those kind of games and asked me to play with him #and it's easier to live with people when they're happy so i tolerate it for him #and tbh i'm decent at the game. i'm not good enough to play by myself though #which i really don't want to. #and ive been playing this other game (which i'l call watermelon cause that's what it means) #which is just this cute kid's matching puzzle game #which is actually really fun #but i started playing it cause i'm so sad from all this loss around me #and i'm afraid i'm gonna die alone #so i'm playing this cutesy game that i'm bad at obsessively to get The Thoughts tm outta my head

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I blinked and its friday now. What

#espy talks #time just goes by so fast

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My brother leaves me doodle prompts on the whiteboard i use as a to-do list, so heres some of the ones ive done.

(The one "labled turtle race" was "swiss chess board"; he gave me a new prompt before i could take a pic of it. Also the first one i think is princess peech? Thats what i remember drawing.)

#espy talks #espy art #espy doodles

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Thunderstorm today. Perfect ambiance.

#espy talks #its not the first one of the year by any means. im just really in the mood for one rn

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Shes gone. We had to have her put down, she wasnt gonna make it.

My dog's very sick. Shes been at the vet's overnight, and something's going on that isn't looking good. Im really not doing great rn

#espy talks #espy keeps talking