glitterparpaing

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“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

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this reminds me of that guy from twitter who used to post fake twitter screenshots where a nonsensical update would send like monsters to your door begging for you to open it if you clicked on the wrong thing and like all of it was hilarious and absurd but some also hit REALLY hard for no reason. i had actual goosebumps for some of them

i can’t remember the name of the guy tho, and can’t seem to find him anywhere on twitter so any help would be welcome bc his stuff was pure gold

oh you're in a horror film/book and your phone died/has no bars? how boring. I think phones in horror SHOULD work. they should ding only to have the protagonist check and find nothing. they should get calls from somebody you don't know but is still somehow in your contacts. google maps should lead you to one place, no matter what address you type in.

phones are such a big part of our daily lives, removing them from horror removes the horror from our experience. what if the horror felt like it could happen to you, right here, right now? what if it felt like it was already happening?

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You know I also think that Atlanta was 8 years ago and tashi and arts daughter is about 8 years old and she really doesn't look like art but like tashi and art really just wants to be a dad onstead of a tennis player (like patrick said) and art and tashi aren't really intimate but tashi and patrick are (the most we see) and what if we don't know if the kid is patricks or arts and like art loves her because maybe he feels patrick and omg the polycule rep is off the charts with these three like please

#challengers #challengers spoilers #SPOILER #(i think?) #gnawing on the bars of my enclosure rn #YES #i hadn’t thought about this but oh god. #oh GOD. #this would make so much sense

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can we get a shoutout to trans girls who don't wear makeup

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Rage. In my heart. All-consuming. FUCK AI.

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because tumblr is the way that it is i can’t scroll the challengers tag without encountering art donaldson x reader smut and whenever i scroll past one all i can think of is this

#both men are absolute bottoms unless it’s patrick w art FIGHT ME

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fundamentally challengers slays because it checks all the boxes to make audiences universally obsessed:

1. it’s very Horny

2. it’s very Fruity

3. it has a kick-ass soundtrack

4. it has hot characters who don’t necessarily look like perfect barbie dolls but actually have peculiar and interesting features

5. sometimes you are a tennis ball being slammed repeatedly into a net by two sweaty men, which surely people will have very normal reactions about

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When you are alone and have a heart attack. What are you gonna do then?

Take a 2 minute break and read this:

Let's say it's 5:25 pm and you're driving home after an unusually hard day's work.

You are really tired and frustrated. All of a sudden your chest pains. They are starting to radiate in the arm and jaw. It feels like being stabbed in the chest and heart. You're only a few miles away from the nearest hospital or home.

Unfortunately you don't know if you can make it..

Maybe you've taken CPR training, but the person running the course hasn't told you how to help yourself.

How do you survive a heart attack when you're alone when it happens? A person who is feeling weak and whose heart is beating hard has only about 10 seconds before losing consciousness.

1. But you can help yourself by coughing repeatedly and very strongly! Deep breaths before every cough. Coughing should be repeated every second until you arrive at the hospital or until your heart starts to beat normally.

2. Deep breathing gives oxygen to your lungs and coughing movements boost the heart and blood circulation. Heart pressure also helps to restore a normal heartbeat. Here's how cardiac arrest victims can make it to the hospital for the right treatment

3. Cardiologists say if someone gets this message and passes it on to 10 people, we can expect to save at least one life.

4. FOR WOMEN: You should know that women have additional and different symptoms. Rarely have crushing chest pain or pain in the arms. Often have indigestion and tightness across the back at the bra line plus sudden fatigue.

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it seems to be rightfully impossible for Mike Faist to have a major role in a movie/musical without making it unbearably homoerotic

and honestly? love that for him

#this statement is really dramatic and probably untrue i hope you know that #i haven’t seen the newsies from 2011 or watched the show he was in #so i can’t say this for sure #but DUDE #the churro scene was IMPROVISED #i was going crazy in my seat #truly love being a homosexual #mike faist #dear evan hansen #connor #west side story (2021) #riff #challengers #art donaldson #gay #mine

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whats cool about being trans is my parents are totally right. i did kill their beautiful son. im the thing that animates his corpse in an ever more convincing parody of a happy girl. i devoured him from the inside out and now there is nothing left of him and he is dead dead dead and there is only me, with my hollow eyes and dark eyeliner and long hair, and my big smile. my limp, effeminate gestures belie the marionetting of the boy they loved. my fagginess is his death. already his body becomes a fitter home for my parasitism in full; the tits, the hips, the thighs. sorry about your kid. thanks for the biomass <3

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Latest reblog reminds me of how much it pisses me the fuck off how every queer person alive has to adapt to the usamerican style of queerness lest we get shunned by the community for being too different. I bring this up a lot but bro that time I got death threats for having ele/dele in my bio bc "by using neopronouns I was making a mockery of REAL trans people" when those are literally just my pronouns in my native language, and when I said that I got hit w the "well you're on the internet so speak english" I HATE GRINGOS I HATE GRINGOS I HATE GRINGOS

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It makes me happy when they listen

#this is like my 2nd favorite thing to do #right after rambling #i want to know everything ever so that tracks #please do tell me about stuff

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barbie official: we’re gonna put all our movies on youtube for free!

youtube, still selling their movies: huh? what’d they say they were going to do?

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i want 60 thousand votes by next thursday

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Why do neurotypicals act like that though . Like sorry for having a slightly messy room why do you treat me like i dont have emotions because of that though

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I’m just going to leave this here…

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enough about taylor swift already. reblog and tag the smallest, least known artist you listen to

#probably dawuna #and fire swimmer #and also agnes kain #love listening to artists recommended by youtube