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[sits up suddenly in a cold sweat] what if my corpse doesn't rot

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marcille, confronted with boiled mushroom: ewwwww it was just up and walking arooouuuund

marcille, confronted with her best friend's skeleton: [etching an evil necromantic circle into the ground] the concepts of "right" and "wrong" were crafted by empires of men to shackle and puppet us

#qq

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canada lynx voted the animal of all time. Boy why are you so paws

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barbie official: we’re gonna put all our movies on youtube for free!

youtube, still selling their movies: huh? what’d they say they were going to do?

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yknow what chilchuck deserved that sex ed talk maybe if someone told him about safe sex earlier he wouldn't of ended up divorced with 3 kids

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#Me

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real thing in my closet i spent money on (my mom was pissed)

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scans of a couple old ones

#Gore #?

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fatphobia and ableism is so insidious. You can look up like, food, and it'll say "eating a lot of food causes diabetes" and you're like oh dang what? I thought we didn't know the cause of diabetes. So you look up what causes diabetes and it says "we still don't know what causes diabetes" bruh they're just making shit up to give people eating disorders

#Piggybacking off thw weight gain one #I was so dangerously underweight because of an unknown condition and I could not gain it back #I also joined an app and constantly looked for ways to get a calorie intake to help me gain #God the people on there are so fucking fat phobic #Seriously #It's either “Im going to skip 3 meals in a row and just drink protein supplements #I'm trying to lose weight for prom“ #Yall have no fucking idea how weight loss and weight gain work #So terrible #Or it'll be like “why are people trying to gain weight just be happy” #IT'S NOT FUCKING ABOUT APPEARANCES RAAAA #I literally felt like I was dying and had to crawl downstairs at one point because i was actually wasting #I empathize I do #But people bringing that shit to your yard when you're actively dying and acting like you're ungrateful #I did meet some awesome health advocates on there though who were just so awesome #They were trying to keep a healthy diet #Or they were gaining because they beat cancer #And some were trying to lose for some surgeries #Seriously they taught me so much about how food intake works #I'll always value them

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if i was in dungeon meshi i would probably love eating the mushroom guys because i love mushrooms but i would most definitely NOT be feeling good about it. theyre just little fucking guys

#qq

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i am skeptical you could do that actually, tiktok user

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*republicans flip gender switch on and off* welcome to hell! welcome to hell!

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I bet Jar Jar is fucking hung like a whale. God he can raw me anyday.

I spent like two? Three? Entire weeks with this sitting in my askbox and I just. I got nothing. What could I possibly answer? I tried all the “nope” gifs in this god forsaken website, I tried to draw what my face looks like every time I read this, I tried to find fanart of jar jar with his wang out and the universe was kind enough to me so that I couldn’t find any. I got nothing. Nada. Abso-fucking-lutely nothing. What am I gonna say? What in god’s name am I gonna say to that?!

You see, I wanna fuck general grievous. I do. I want him use all his four arms to simultaneously pull both my arms back and touch my tits as he fucks me with his mecha-schlong. I do. I wanna fuck darth Maul, pre-legs cut off or post metal legs+metal dick enhancement. I wanna lick those horns. Okay? I wanna fuck darth vader. Boy, oh, boy, I do. I wanna hear that hard breathing and wrap my legs over that dramatic cape while he force-chokes me and we do the do. Am I a weird robot-fucker? You bet your ass I am! Am I a tad too much on the horny side? Probably. Did I extrapolate my right to be horny on main? Fucking sue me. But this. THIS.

How do you want me to face my family and all the three (3) friends I have irl? How do you want me to walk into an elevator with a bunch of strangers and when an old lady says “the weather has been a little hot lately, isn’t it weird?” just to do small talk like every fucking old people I don’t know do, how do you expect me not to answer her with “y’know what’s weirder, someone at this very moment is thinking about Jar Jar Binks going balls-deep in them and I cannot talk about this to anyone and the knowledge of this? it’s eating me alive. ALIVE, ma’am, and I don’t mean this as some sick vore reference. Someone’s dreaming of those popped-up eyes, of that weird high-pitched voice screaming MEESA COMING while they’re filled up by Jar Jar Bink’s thick seed, and I’m just standing here while this very notion rots me to the core, taking all life away from me. It’s a nightmare. My entire life, a nightmare, because of an anon message from a horny jar jar fucker on tumblr. This is my floor now, ma’am, have a good day”

I leave the elevator. I probably have an appointment, but I can’t remember where, or what for. I sit down on the floor by the elevator doors. I sob for a full minute. I take the elevator back downstairs, I walk home, I collapse in bed and rub one out thinking of darth vader. I feel better.

Five minutes later, I think about this ask again, and my whole world collapses again. It’s only Tuesday. I sigh heavily and sit down to write this reply.-

Edit: a lot of this is exaggeration. Some of it is true. You get to pick what exactly.

#Nsfw text #And I mean it this time #Absolutely fire though Ty for the read