kaythegayest

[kaythegayest]

If I'm going to be parasocial here, back when those Jackbox streams were happening, you could tell which were a "content creator friend group" and who were actually friends when they weren't streaming. Like, you had one group that when it came time to write insults or jokes about someone would go with very "haha dicks and your mom" jokes and then you had SBI who would write the most custom tailored jokes about each other you had ever seen. You'd have Philza Minecraft calling Wilbur Soot a sad emo boy who does nothing but make pitiful guitar music and flop his hair over his eyes and then Wilbur would shoot back that Tommy had done nothing but call them repeatedly until everyone gave up fighting him and made his entire career out of being a mash up of Schlatt and Wilbu and Techno would rip apart anyone that tried to even APPROACH their dynamic while reminding the rest of SBI that they had been owned by him in every game or server they've ever done together.

Then they'd finish streaming and go play fucking Risk or something 10 hours like nothing had been said.

Like. I fucking miss SBI, man. There's a reason I think we all fixated on them during quarantine and it's because there was a genuineness to their friendship that others couldn't replicate. You knew it was a treat to see them on streams together because you knew they'd rather be offline doing stuff together than entertaining us.

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NOTE TO SELF-SLOW THE FUCK DOWN!

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Fe3h x Howl's Moving Castle

Follow us to read our fire emblem comic, the Throne of the Damned!

We appreciate all support <3

With love,

Alora

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Lost in the Woods

Ship: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Byleth Eisner (female, but he doesn't really know it until the end)

Summary:

Kingdom Founding Day. Dimitri finds himself lost after trying (and failing) to follow the hunting party that his father and Glenn were in. Fortunately, there's a strange child that seems willing to help him get back to camp.

Rating: Teens & Up

Written as a sort-of art trade with KC on Twitter!

AO3 Link

Dimitri glared at the bush full of bright red berries.

Eating them would probably be a bad idea… But, what if these were wild cranberries? After all, it was autumn. Dimitri knew that cranberries were harvested around this time: he had seen them for sale in the markets at Fhirdiad.

His stomach rumbled. Reminding him of why he was even considering eating the mysterious bright red berries. Sir Gustave had said to never eat anything that he couldn’t identify. But, these looked like cranberries… maybe. If they tasted foul, he’d just spit them out right away. It should be fine.

Just when he was about to reach out to grab a fistful of the berries, Dimitri heard the characteristic whizz of an arrow being shot just behind him. He yelped and fell back, the arrow missing his head by a hand.

“Who’s there?!” He asked, crawling around to where the arrow must have come from.

“Don’t eat that,” a calm voice said from a tree. “Those are cotoneaster berries.”

When Dimitri looked up, he saw a thin kid hook a bow and quiver on a branch. Then, they slipped down landing neatly on their feet.

“What are you doing here?” Dimitri asked.

“Birds like to gather around here,” said the kid. “And you?”

“I’m…” Dimitri then felt a wave of emotion that hit him that he had been holding back for the entire day.

It was the Kingdom Founding Day celebrations, and Lord Rodrigue had invited Dimitri’s father and other friends over for a hunt. The children were supposed to stay close to the camp while the adults went out to hunt. Normally, Dimitri didn’t mind playing with his friends. But the only other kid he knew in that group was Glenn, and he had left with the hunting party. Dimitri had tried sneakily follow after them. At first, it had been easy to follow their trail. But eventually, he realized that he couldn’t see any prints and didn’t recognize where he was.

And although he knew what was happening, saying it seemed to make him realize just how horrible his situation was.

“I’m lost!” He cried. “I’m lost, and hungry and c-cold a-and…!”

Dimitri couldn’t hold back his tears anymore, and he cried, feeling his burning tears on his freezing face.

He stopped crying when he saw a piece of barley bread shoved in front of his face. He blinked at the piece of bread.

“Eat,” said the kid.

Dimitri took the bread. It was a little hard, but he was too hungry to care. When the piece of bread was gone, the kid shoved a water flask to his face.

“Drink,” said the weird kid.

As Dimitri drank the water, the kid turned to the tree where they had come down and climbed it. After a while, they came back down.

“There’s a campfire south of here,” said the kid calmly. “It looks like a big one.”

“That must be our campsite!” Dimitri gasped. “Oh no… my dad’s going to scold me for leaving the camp!”

“He won’t if you get there before he does,” said the weird kid. They held out their hand. “Let me take you there.”

Dimitri wiped the tears in his eyes, before taking their hand. Despite the slight autumn chill, the kid’s hand was warm and comforting.

They guided him through the forest. At first, both Dimitri and the kid had to walk through thick hedges and shrubs. But after that, they chanced upon a path that made their trek easier. Sometimes, the strange kid would tell him to wait and would climb up a tree. Once the kid confirmed that they were going in the right direction, they would continue on.

Soon enough, Dimitri could smell the scent of sausages roasting over a fire. Which was doubly relieving: they were almost at the campsite and the hunting party still wasn’t back, since they were cooking the sausages they had brought along the trip.

When Dimitri saw the teal-blue banners of house Fraldarius, he could barely contain his excitement. He rushed into the camp, relieved and happy to be back. In his excitement, he didn’t even notice that he was practically dragging the strange kid by the hand.

“Your Highness!” One of the girls waved at him. “Where were you?”

“Lost,” said the weird kid.

Dimitri practically jumped in place when he heard the weird kid’s voice.

“Oooh,” the girl nodded. “That must have been very scary!”

“I’m fine!” Dimitri cut in before the weird kid could reveal that they found him about to eat some weird berries or how he immediately started crying when they saw them. “See? I’m here!”

“Yeah, you are,” the girl nodded. “We just got the sausages out! Are you hungry, your Highness?”

“I am,” the weird kid said.

And although the girl didn’t seem to like the kid speaking up, Dimitri realized that he had a great chance to show his appreciation to them for helping him out.

“Let me invite you to a sausage!” Dimitri said. “It’s the least I can do after you gave me your bread and water!”

“Yes,” the weird kid said with a nod. “That sounds fair.”

They walked towards the campfire where the other children were gathered around, roasting venison sausages that were impaled on long forks. Dimitri took a fork and two sausages. One for him, and one for the kid. However, when he turned around, he saw the weird kid was holding a fork that had six sausages on it and was calmly holding it over the fire.

“Smells good,” said the kid as their venison sausages began to brown over the flame.

“Yeah…” Dimitri said, sitting down next to the weird kid.

For a minute or two, they cooked their sausages in silence. The kid then pulled out their fork and blew on their crispy sausages.

“Thanks for the meal,” said the weird kid. And then, they managed to open their mouth wide enough to take a bite of two sausages at once.

They must’ve been quite serious when they said they were hungry. Dimitri felt a little guilty that he had eaten their bread without a thought earlier that day. At least he was making it up to them.

“S’good,” said the kid with a mouthful of sausage.

“Yeah! Venison sausages always taste best when roasted,” said Dimitri.

“All food tastes best when roasted,” said the kid, before taking another bite of their sausages.

After they ate their sausages, there was a loud blare of a hunting horn. A signal that the hunting party was retuning!

“Oh! You’ve got to meet my dad!” Dimitri pulled the kid by the hand. “He’ll be thrilled to meet someone so skilled with wildlife survival!”

“No, I’m sorry,” the kid said, slipping their hand away.

“Huh?”

“I need to go back to my own camp, before the sun sets.”

“Oh…” Dimitri sighed. “Okay… I guess your own dad would be worried about you.”

The strange kid then knelt down on one knee, and brought their lips on Dimitri’s hand. After kissing his hand, they stood back up and waved at him. “Good bye.”

Dimitri stood there, too shocked at what had happened. By the time the strange child was gone, he realized that he didn’t even ask for their name.

“Oh man, I think they’re following us,” Claude huffed, looking over his shoulder.

“Because you ran off and drew their attention,” Edelgard panted as they continued their desperate escape.

“At least the other students won’t be hurt by the bandits,” Dimitri pointed out. “Now that they’re following us we’ve drawn them far enough from the encampment.”

“Look! Is that—?” Edelgard pointed at the watch tower that could barely be seen in the darkness. 

“A village!” Dimitri let out a sigh of relief. “If we’re lucky, there should be some mercenaries or experienced fighters staying there.”

“I sure hope your princeliness has enough money for a royal ransom, because if they’re in cahoots with the bandits we’re done,” Claude pointed out.

“Let’s just see how it goes,” said Edelgard, rapping on the door of a building that seemed to be the local inn.

After talking to one of the mercenaries on duty, he agreed to bring the captain and second-in-command to hear them out. Soon enough, they were face-to-face with a gruff-looking mercenary. And just behind —

“Oh!” Dimitri gasped.

Though it had been years, he could recognize that face anywhere. It was the same face as the strange kid that saved him when he was lost in the woods. Though they were only a little bit older than him, it made perfect sense that the kid that had helped him out was a mercenary. After all, only someone with real experience on the field would be able to tell what kind of berry was edible or not.

Unfortunately, after seeing her face, Dimitri’s eyes were then drawn to her ample bosom. The shock of realizing that his childhood savior was standing before him, alongside the sheer size of her chest, must have made him look like he was simply ogling at her. True, the shape and size was… considerable. But he wasn’t staring because of that!

“What are you kids doing out here so early in the morning?” The gruff mercenary asked, crossing his arms.

Dimitri knew better than to keep staring and floundering to ask her if she remembered him. He decided to cut to the chase.

“Apologies, we wouldn’t disturb you if the situation weren’t dire,” he explained. “We are being pursued by bandits.”

With the preparations to launch the counteroffensive, Dimitri couldn’t find the occasion to talk to his mysterious rescuer —who had introduced herself curtly as ‘Byleth’. But that was okay. He could later talk to her once things calmed down.

#dimileth #<3

[kaythegayest]

Honestly I love this recent stylistic 3D movie trend where they have clearly started with 2D designs and developed them recognizable instead of forcing them into Disney/Dreamworks market-owning design rules

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🧍

#fe 3 houses #fe3h #female byleth #byleth eisner #byleth fire emblem #fe3h byleth

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REBLOG IF THIS RELATES TO YOU:

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

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twilight princess sillies

[kaythegayest]

whoever decided to turn daisy bell into a spooky dookie creepypasta song is fucking evil. that computer was brave enough to sing us a delightful little song and you do THIS to him? thats hatsune mikus grandpa dude. fuck you

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more adhd things

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love triangles can’t exist without at least 1 lgbt person. cishets just don’t know how shapes work

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I will open the fucking TikTok app just to watch this video multiple times

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Yaaaaas 😍

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Octopus

#octopus

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