kramercafe

[kramercafe]

the history of animation in a nutshell

Early 1900s: hey what if comic strips could like move?

Late 1910s early 1920s hey what if we mashed this up with live action people?

late 1920s: hey what if this thing had sound?

Early to mid 1930s: hey what if this had people actually talking and also color?

late 1930s: hey you know that super cool movie that one lady animated with paper cut out silhouettes? What if we did that with painted cells? Would people even pay to see that? Never mind it turns out the answer is yes.

1940s: ah shit most of our animators got drafted and/or hate us now cause we weren’t paying them. IT’S PROPAGANDA TIME BABY. Also haha hitler got hit with a mallet and also the most racist depictions of Japanese people ever.

1950s to 1960s : oh what’s this newfangled thing? Television? What if you could air cartoons on it? Oh fuck no I ain’t paying that much to get the charecters to have different backgrounds and for the charecters to like, move fluidly. Also manga and anime are steadily growing more popular.

1970s: (Ralph Bakshi walks into a comics store and finds a furry comic) X rated animated movie? *cue the screams of mothers and their unsuspecting children now being introduced to the revolutionary idea that cartoons don’t equal kids stuff? WHAT IS THE WORLD COMING TO?

1980s to 1990s: we can have full on animated Broadway musicals? Wait, what do you mean animated movies can count for the Oscar’s? What do you mean now they get their own catagory because the academy still thinks their for babies? Anime and manga are taking off in the west. SWEET JESUS WHAT DRUGS ARE THE JAPANESE ON SHOWING THIS SHIT TO KIDS. But also why is it so fucking good. Maybe some of these aren’t even meant for kids? Wait We can sell toys to kids with cartoons? Wait we can actually put effort into these cartoons on television? The fuck to you mean we can animate in 3D now? What do you mean we can have well animated, well written sitcom shows like the simpsons? What do you mean you can make cartoon charecters say fuck? What drugs are creators at Nickelodeon on? Do I even want to know?

2000s: oh my god, there is this one show that I really like cause it’s really well written and genuinely funny but I can’t talk about it because it’s animated and we all know cartoons are for babies right? Oh look it’s the transformers movie, look how far CGI has evolved so we can make the transformers in a movie.

2010s: holy shit I know these shows are for kids but they’re just well written and have so much meaningful things to say about the world. Wait, it’s cool to like cartoons now? They they have fandoms for this? Fuck yeah I’m in. (Enters one of the most notoriously toxic fandoms of all time) THEY HAVE GAY PEOPLE IN THESE SHOWS NOW? AND COMPLEX EMOTIONAL STORYTELLING? AND ADULT ANIMATED SHOWS CAN BE MORE THAN JUST SITCOMS WITH THE SAME JOKES AND STYLE? WHY IS IT THAT EVERY DISNEY CARTOON SINCE GRAVITY FALLS INCLUDE THINGS THAT GET MORE AND MORE FUCKED UP? WHY DO I FUCKING LOVE IT? WHY THE FUCK DID DISNEY DO THE OWL HOUSE DIRTY LIKE THAT?

2020s: I got this show I wanna pitch but it dosen’t fit into any box that the networks want and also I’m afraid that they’ll just randomly cancel it before I can finish the story I want to tell. Wait, I can just post the pilot on my YouTube channel, see if anybody actually likes this thing I made and just make the show independently? FUCK THE NETWORK! I AM THE NETWORK

[kramercafe]

Taking the midnight train

Keep an eye out for ghost trains. They pull in more often than you think.

If you hear the flute signal once, enter. If you hear it twice, enter at your own risk. If you hear it three times, run. 

The train does not always enjoy carrying human passengers. 

Make sure to never carry peanut butter in your luggage.

Never wear matching socks.

If a man in an oversized brown coat sits next to you and asks you for the time, tell him it is nine o'clock. He will go away. Eventually. 

Do not eat any food offered to you. 

Do not use the bathrooms between 00:06 and 00:26. 

When you hear the railroad crossing bells, spirits are entering the train. They are passengers just like you.

Always keep your ticket in your right pocket.

Someone will want to buy your ticket. Refuse to sell it at all costs. 

If your ticket changes date, do not be alarmed. 

You might hear weird sounds down the aisle. 

Never fall asleep with your head against the window.

Always count the number of passengers in your carriage. If the number changes before a stop, leave immediately. 

Passengers sometimes change faces.

Always get off at your stop. Not doing so allows for the train to claim you. 

Never ask when the next stop is.

Remember rule 17. 

Do not travel alone, it keeps you sane.

Pixies are your friends, fairies are your foes. Do not trust either though.

If you forget your luggage in the train, it is imperative you forget about it.

Never let the train conductor see you with more than two rings on one hand.

Jack is the good driver, Steve is alright, Martin will get you killed.

Do not leave your seat if the train comes to an abrupt stop in the Middle of Nowhere.

When going through tunnels, the sounds might scare you, but only be frightened once you feel their presence.

Silence is okay. Too much silence is not. 

Pay attention to the lights before getting off; if the lights flicker and dim, think twice about leaving. 

Exit through the right door.

Always thank the tracks for not taking you down the wrong path. 

More guides

How to collect stardust

Getting abducted by aliens and how to escape

[kramercafe]

During a blackout

Don’t rush for a flashlight or a candle. Just stay calm.

You may feel like you’re being watched. You are. But don’t worry, they’re not here to hurt you. They just got a bit overly excited.

Sometimes, during a blackout, a single TV will turn on. Turn it off.

You’ll often hear voices. If you focus you can make out what they’re saying. Feel free to strike up a conversation if they seem friendly.

Remember, nothing will hurt you in a blackout unless you panic.

This is always a nice opportunity to go outside and look at the stars. Don’t try to find constellations though. The ones you know aren’t there.

It may seem as if there’s someone else in your house. Pay them no mind.

Your pets will get anxious. Comfort them.

You may think this is a good time to try to commune with some spirits. And it absolutely is! Say hi.

Though the dark will not hurt you in any manner, you may start to feel strange and have strange thoughts. Focus on your breathing in these instances.

Sometimes people you know disappear in blackouts. Don’t worry. They’ll be there when the lights turn back on.

Many of them are lonely. You may even hear crying. It is wise to comfort them. The blackout likely won’t stop until they find peace.

Stay away from mirrors.

As long as you take the back door, you can wander wherever you want and explore things you’d normally never see. When the lights come back on you’ll be back home and those paths will be gone. Just don’t use the front door to do this.

Once the blackout ends, you may feel compelled to say goodbye. It’s best you don’t. It’ll only make it harder for them.

More guides

Manifesting your imaginary friend

Exploring abandoned buildings 

If you are a researcher or adventurer and want to share a guide, join our subreddit!

[kramercafe]

You press a small stone gargoyle into the child’s hands and say, “This protected me in the dark all my life; now, I give its protection to you.” The next day, you’re dead.

[kramercafe]

New Crow Time 🐦‍⬛🦊🌟

[kramercafe]

get ready for an exuberant summer

[kramercafe]

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

[kramercafe]

Psych is so good because you’ve got:

- Deeply weird guy masquerading as an even weirder guy

- His dad

- Deeply weird guy masquerading as a normal guy

- Feral girl with a thin veneer of normalcy

- Deeply weird guy who thinks he’s 100% normal

[kramercafe]

Middle-aged magical girl.

She's been defending the Earth since the early 90s and she's very tired.

[kramercafe]

Is there a better source of drama than watching a character be pushed to their breaking point?

Like, I joke about it but it really does feel like the secret to make a good story is just "Make a character -> Throw challenge after challenge at them -> See how they react."

There is something...

...just fascinating about knowing how to challenge your character without making it feel like a misery fest and actually making an exploration of how people respond when they reach their limits. How do they reach it? Why do they reach it? Can they make it back? How do they respond? Where do we draw the limit?

This is why the conflict is such a crucial part of a narrative. The walls that you make for your character to face and hopefully overcome is what will test your skill as a writer.

You can't make it too easy because then it becomes anti-climatic, and you can't make it too hard either because then it will feel like you're just torturing your character, and if the breaking point doesn't feel earned it will be like the writer is just trying to force the drama instead of journeying through it.

I've seen a few cases where a character will snap for very mundane reasons and it makes me go "You just wanted to have your cool 'I'm going Super Sayan' moment, you don't really care about this character's emotional struggle." 😑

You gotta find that right balance of what you're gonna throw at your hero and how you're going to explore it for your story.

It's tricky, but if you manage to pull it off, it can lead to some really great storytelling, character study, and theme exploration.

[kramercafe]

how to grow the fuck up

[kramercafe]

OCs Up For Adoption

I've come to the realization that an old superhero series I created which was actually the very first idea for a TV series that I ever had is no longer viable to use as a series. The idea is unoriginal and doesn't bring anything new to the table, and anything it does bring to the table has already been done much better by other shows I've created. However, I want to put the characters from the series to good use still, so I'll be taking most of them and repurposing them as best I can in other shows. The rest of them I'm basically putting up for adoption. These are my lists of characters that I have from this series, both heroes and villains. Apologies for most of their descriptions being pretty barebones. I am lazy and have most of their details just memorized thanks to the importance this series has to me. If you need clarification on any specific details for any of these guys, let me know and I'll fill you in lol.

If any of y'all want to adopt any of these characters, let me know which ones you might want and we can see whether or not I'm willing to let you have them. I'd ordinarily charge, like, 10 bucks per character you want to adopt depending on how important they are to me, but if you're poor like me and can't afford to blow any money on crap like this, we can work something else out I'm sure. I've also already promised some of my other friends first dibs on some of these guys or they're otherwise too important to me to give up. Those characters are all highlighted in red. Anyone else is free for grabs provided I say it's okay. DM me if you're interested in any of them or want any extra details. Enjoy!

Heroes: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1XMggsIGhNGfg2PJycWm1IBhhIbiwquYz1N1EAXpNQ6g/edit?usp=sharing

Villains: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1S_v6_AA63vkCN75HSSlQX4G4V7H1BKHYAT-JutPDk_A/edit?usp=sharing

#character adopt #oc adopt #superheroes #my ocs

[kramercafe]

Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz: Capable of inventing devices that have the potential to tear apart the fabric of reality on a daily basis, canonically number three on OWCA’s most wanted list, is fully capable of easily taking over the entire world if given the proper motivation.

Also Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz: Got beaten to a bloody pulp by a potted plant, does not know what a boat is, got divorced over a tomato puppet.

Also also Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz: Is personally responsible for at least 80% of Candace Flynn’s daily suffering and trauma.

#phineas and ferb #dr. doofenshmirtz #heinz doofenshmirtz #candace flynn #perry the platypus

[kramercafe]

Little Komi Can't Communicate moments that I like

I wanted to save space by cramming these all into one post.

Najimi's silly in this scene and she's my favorite :)

They're cute together :)

I just like Najimi man IDK what to say.

These pages were just cute.

No pictures but I love chapter 89.

This one’s just funny.

I feel like Najimi can only have intrusive thoughts.

Gaze upon my penis peasants!

Mmm~, I love men who still play with action figures.

Ran out of image space check reblogs.

#komi can't communicate

[kramercafe]

[kramercafe]

Doomie :)

[kramercafe]

Decided to draw one of my characters for the first time. First time doing a full female character. And in this case, introducing Olivia for my Hunters Call story!

Here is a bit of lore for her and her kind:

Dolls are constructs made out of a mixture of Spirit Wood, latex like material, and a few unknown materials. Created by Maximillian Wanderton, they are each specifically crafted for each new Hunter that joins the ranks of the Hunters Call. Their purpose is to provide a variety of services including cooking, cleaning and maintaining equipment, aiding in combat, healing their Hunter, and relieving stress. They are described by Hunters to be “the perfect caretaker, warrior, and on rare occasions a lover.”