kreidewaltz

[kreidewaltz]

i’m back ?? i’m js actually reading genshin and hq fics here

[kreidewaltz]

SUNA RINTARŌ, akaashi keiji, jing yuan, KAEDEHARA KAZUHA, xiao, diluc, caelus, DAN HENG, sugawara kōshi, KITA SHINSUKE, MIYA OSAMU, IWAIZUMI HAJIME, blade, SEMI EITA, cyno, KENMA KOZUME

[kreidewaltz]

to the stars above | z.

featuring. zhongli (genshin impact)

genre. fluff, angst, smut, ancient-liyue!au

word count. 5.4k

marga's notes. aAAAa look look, it's my first commission!! school has kept me really occupied for like the past month but after pulling a few all-nighters, i've finally finished my responsibilities along with this little baby! once again, from the bottom of my heart, thank you to my bubs @ramannnn for trusting me with this one <33

Nobody knows when the world began, how it came to be and why it continues to be. Even I, whose mind is filled with nothing but wonder for it, have no idea. One thing I am quite sure of... is how mine did.

It all started with him— a man of many titles, different identities yet at the end of the day, all these monikers are the same; it's all him. He adored Liyue more than anything else, knew it like the back of his hand. He went where the winds lead him, stayed where the moon shines upon him, stood where the golden sun kissed his skin. He found serenity in the walks he travels as he goes about his day, the sceneries his eyes take in and the calm sounds the nature resonates for him. And as if it was fate decided upon by the Celestia, it led him to me. Suddenly, my little world that used to be nothing became everything... quickly and all at once.

An exasperated sigh escapes from my lips, frustration and disappointment filling my whole being as I stare at the blank parchment paper I held in my hands. Another day was again wasted with no progress, I thought, mentally beating myself up for not being productive enough. Before I could further drown myself into such pessimistic ideas, I snap out of it and let my eyes cherish the view that lies ahead of me. Though I feel a little guilty for taking Vermeer's place, I can only whisper an apology with little to no sincerity. Because truly, nothing can beat the picturesque landscape of Luhua Pool— the crystal clear waters that would most probably reflect my face like a mirror if I were to ever look at it, the ruins that ignited the spark of curiosity within me, wondering about the pasts it holds and the stillness and feeling of peace it gives me as I sit in this cliff. Feeling somewhat a bit better, I place my things on top of the old bag I bring no matter where I go. There's always a better day for writing, I tell myself as a form of consolation, bringing my slim arms up to begin stretching. I've been sitting on this log for quite a long time now, after all.

"It seems like you are in a bit of a dilemma," a deep voice comments from behind me. Out of surprise, I lightly jump and turn my head towards the stranger. Right at that moment, it felt as if all the air circulating inside my body had been depleted. Captivating was an understatement as to how he appeared before me. With the sunlight striking his face and accenting his unique features further, he stood with his hands behind him, head tilted as he looked at me with interest, all while keeping his dignified posture.

"Oh, hello. I am afraid so, yes," I respond, or rather, mutter under my breath since I was not really used to having sudden encounters with other people, nor am I fond of it. I tend to keep to myself, finding it much more peaceful than having to tend to others' overbearing expectations and demands which is partly the reason why I chose to live in the outskirts, far from the center of Liyue that contrasts my comfortable abode, "I apologize. I failed to realize that somebody other than Vermeer liked to stay here," I told him, arching my eyebrows a little when he let out a breathy chuckle.

"Oh, you have no need for such formal apologies. I do not always go here, at least probably not as often as the man you call Vermeer. I was simply taking a walk and I think I got carried away by Liyue's view and eventually, my feet led me here," he explains, a hint of sheepishness present in his tone, "and I guess I'll have to thank my feet for that."

Because it led me to you, interesting one. For many years, it will remain unspoken, kept by the strange man to himself and unveiled once his heart gives up from the resistance he upholds.

For the following hours of lounging around Luhua Pool, I learned a lot about the stranger— he calls himself "Morax," and like the god of Liyue, he enjoyed history and is extremely knowledgeable about it, aspiring to know and understand everything of the world, he often brews tea, even going as far as inviting me once I am free from any form of work. Just as he shared facts about himself, I did too.

"So, Cheng, you said you have a bit of a dilemma?" he inquires, slightly angling his head towards the direction of the side I'm sitting on. I nod my head up and down, mouth forming into a small pout of disappointment as I remember that today has not been that progressive.

"Yes. I am trying to write a novel, you see. Something that will leave an impact on this world so that even if I may pass, I will still live on the memories of people," I tell him, an ambitious expression present on my face. He hums, eyes going over the terraces that make up the current view we have and the two huge statues standing by the ruins, "Why so?"

I pause for a moment to think of a reply, "I guess I just do not want to let someone alone in this cold world. Wouldn't that be too cruel and sad, to just leave them with nothing?"

If I'm able to write words that will provide comfort to my readers, then maybe... just maybe the world will be less lonely... even for just a little bit. At least, that's what I thought as silence consumed us, the sun setting as if to remind us that finally, another day is nearing its end. Now, what will tomorrow bring?

"Well then, I do hope I will be able to read at least some of your works at least once," he speaks as he stands up, lightly dusting away his clothes, "It certainly has been a pleasure to be your company, Cheng."

As he walks down the slope of the hill, his somewhat broad back facing me, I call out, "Will you be back?"

He stops and turns, a soft smile is plastered on his face as he responds, "Only time will tell."

But time was no friend of mine. At least that's what I have come to realize as many days passed without him returning to this place. Though maybe it's only because it almost felt as if time slowed down and I was only eager to see him again, something I have scolded myself to— what a fragile heart do I have to already seek a stranger's presence? That is what others call love at first sight, a devilish portion of my mind whispered cheekily within me and I gasped in disbelief, "Absolutely not," I lightly slap both of my cheeks, "I'm just too coped up in my own world. I probably need to go see more people."

That thought remains a simple yearning though because once again, I find myself lounging around the same spot in Luhua, a quiet hope ignited within me, fulfilled when I hear the familiar voice he adorns as he speaks, "You're here."

I release a sound that is between a giggle and a breathy chuckle, "And I see your feet had led you here once more?"

"They were curious, or should I say... I was," he explains as he takes a seat beside me, his posture remaining solid despite the uncomfortable position.

"Of what?" I ask.

"Of you," he simply replies, unaware of the sudden yet unsurprising effect it had on my heart that was already beating rapidly with just his mere presence. I try not to be so showy of it though, too embarrassed to even think of how fast I became fond of him.

But it was no wonder. After all, he himself was an interesting one; from the way he carries himself, the way he speaks, and the way he's just him... all and every action hold so much dignity that it just leaves me almost breathless and in awe every single time my eyes finds their way to his figure— and to think that this was just our second meeting? My mother would most probably let out the most shameless giggle as I tell her these thoughts, pushing me and teasing me like a normal person in their teens would. I shake my head to get out of these thoughts, listening to Morax as he tells another wonderful tale, almost making me think that he lived it himself with how he knew it, going over even with the smallest details.

"You know, Morax, you have such a good memory to remember all of those things despite simply hearing about it," I suddenly speak up in the midst of the silence that engulfed us while he tries to think of the next story to tell, "I hope I can stay in them too... in your memories, I mean. I know I am far from being the most interesting person but for some reason, I wish for that."

He pauses, eyes trailing slowly towards me, beyond my knowledge, before he lets out a somber smile. You already are, is another one of him that becomes an afterthought.

I heaved out a sigh before shaking my head again, "Ah! Why do I keep having such lonely thoughts? Forget about that. Please do not mind me, alright? I think I really need to stop being stuck in the mountains."

I pick up my small bag and shuffle inside it, letting out a quiet sound of 'aha!' as a sort of celebration when I successfully got a small book out, "Here."

He blinked his eyes in confusion, wondering what it was I handed to him so I spoke in delight, "You told me you wanted to read at least one of my works so, here. I am warning you though, it is not like the ones that sell best in the bookstores. It might bore you, or weird you out like what others say."

"What others say?"

"They say it's too unrealistic, too impossible... but I believe otherwise. We live in a world where gods and adepti watch over us. What makes my story impossible then?" I ponder, him still being confused.

"What is it about anyway?" He asks, having no idea of what the context my book had.

"It's about an archon who began living as a simple man in Liyue."

Our meetings became more frequent after that and eventually, we got comfortable with even just the presence of each other, having no need for long talks and such, but just peace. Today, like any other day, Morax was just reading the book I gave him, while I was thinking of what my next story would be about. Occasionally, he looks at me with an odd expression that is almost equivalent to astonishment, as if I have done something so great that it made him look at me that way.

"What made you think of this plot?" he asks all of a sudden, not forgetting to put a piece of paper that served as a bookmark on the page where he stopped just in case he accidentally closed it.

I hum, thinking about my answer to his question, "Hmm. Truth to be told, it was just a mere wonder for me. Archons and the adepti, although not entirely immortal, live so much longer than an average human does, watching over us as we go about our daily lives, waiting for sudden wars to break out and then fight the enemies that attack us. Growing up, those were the things that all the people around me told me. So I began to wonder, do they ever get tired? Is it not too taxing to keep on doing that? What if... they just lived with us, among the crowds? Because I think it is too lonely wherever they are. Would it not be better if they were with us, rather than above us, so they could at least have memories to live by?"

Morax does not give a response, or rather, he finds it difficult to find one. Still, it does not stop the affection that spreads within him. He does not say it out loud, but for someone who prefers to be alone, Cheng was full of empathy. And somehow, that did wonders to Morax's heart.

"Now that I think about it, I kind of actually want to address my books to them now," I hum once more, "It would be like a message for them: Do not be too lonely even if we pass. Because of your help, through these stories, we can show you that we lived a good life."

I huff as soon as I finish my sentence, "Although one of those who read it said that was impossible, because according to them, why would archons give up their power to live a life where there is only simplicity?"

Morax let out a sound that made it look as if he got offended himself, "Archons can do that, can they not?"

"I know! That was what I was saying to them. Anyway, I am not forcing them to like what I wrote. It's just a story, after all. It can do no harm," I shrug, beginning to fix my belongings as the sun began to set, "I should go now, Morax. It is still quite a long walk to my home."

"I want to live a good life too," he suddenly tells me, making me halt and turn to him in confusion, "With you. The good life and memories you shall tell in your stories, can I be part of them too?"

The universe does not stop for anyone, nor does time— science will consistently proclaim this fact matter what timeline we shall live in. No matter how much someone begs to the Celestia to grant their wish of controlling, or stopping time, no one will be able to do such things. But somehow, it seems like when it comes to him, everything is possible as I feel my world stop at his words, just like the way it also began when I met him. And as if planets were colliding with each other, I suddenly felt my heart crash upon him and as if out of instinct, I let go of the truth.

"Of course. It would be the greatest thing to have you."

Life was strange in its own way. That is what I have come to realize in this simple life of mine.

Despite the fact that the "me" of the previous year has never even thought about putting my whole being on my sleeve, it is pleasingly odd how right now, I find myself in this kind of situation with the man who swept me right under my feet and claimed my heart as his.

“You're cold," I whisper amidst the silence of the night in my abode, my index tracing the ears of the man who had me sitting right on his lap, the shorter strands of his silky hair tucked behind them. So, so alluring.

He takes hold of my wrist, planting a soft kiss on its side, all while maintaining eye contact as he quietly drawls, "Then I suppose you can keep me warm tonight. Will you?"

As if in a trance, I nod my head, letting him take the lead as he laid me down, back against the soft mattress, him following on top with his arms supporting his build. With arising confidence, I circle my arms around him and pull him down, bringing our lips together, a sigh of relief escaping both of our mouths as if to say, "Finally."

I wonder if he thinks the same way as I do— that this was Celestia in its own way. I felt like I could do anything as long as it was with him. The kiss felt like the power we once suppressed from each other became a supernova that changed our world's course all of a sudden. But despite the tension and heat we both emitted at the moment, there is a warmth that engulfs me the same time he fully wraps his arms around me.

I am here. I will always be here.

No noise disturbs the peace we have created, only the quiet sound of crickets reach our ears but even that fails to distract him from what he's doing. He gently tugs on the sash that keeps my coat tied. Nimble fingers explore the remains of my clothing, loosening all until I am set free from them.

His eyes raked over my body, an expression of awe plastered on his face for so long that it made me somewhat conscious. Because as he unravels his to me, I am enlightened by the fact that my figure is nothing worth comparing to his — not even close. A hint of sweat glints from his skin due to the moonlight, making him look even more ethereal. But who was I to complain?

So instead, I look down, fiddling a little with my fingers as I feel my cheeks heat up. How is it that I only realize now what kind of situation we are currently in? Before I further drown in such shameless thoughts, he lifts my head up by the chin, an amused look on his usually-gentle face, "Are you feeling shy, beloved?"

I meekly nodded, to which he lets out a soft laugh and whispers, "Don't be. You are the epitome of beauty itself. If you don't believe me, allow me to show you nothing but truth tonight, I swear under the moon and all these stars."

He dips down and captures my lips in a kiss once again with more passion, if it was still even possible.

"You are made for me, as I'm made for you," he proclaims as he thrusts inside me after minutes of preparation, soft pants and groans following his statements. I can only whimper in response, pain evident in my tone at first with my hands lightly clawing at his back. I pray to the heavens above that they don't leave awful marks after this.

He halts and utters an apology, thumb caressing the bone of my cheeks while he waits for me to adjust. He scans my face after a few seconds, relief flashing in his eyes when I nod for him to continue.

"I... b..." I try to speak out but the pleasure overwrites any sensical thought that goes through my mind. He slows down a little, looking over my face and smiles, urging me to talk.

"Stay with me, beloved. We still have all night," he tells me, encouraging me to voice what has been on my mind.

"I... I belong to you, always have and always will..." I manage to croak out, voice quite hoarse due to the sounds that I let out previously. Perhaps pleased with what I have proclaimed, he begins going even deeper and at the same moment, I begin falling deeper.

"Yes, yes, you do," he repeats like a mantra, his voice sounding more and more desperate to reach his high. I cry out with him, creating a harmony that even the best bards shall be ashamed.

It was a long night— the longest yet most beautiful night I have ever had in this simple life of mine. And in that moment, as we reach the stars together, I knew right there and then that this man is someone who will be etched in my heart for as long as I live, deep into its roots— for him, it shall beat and it shall love.

You, who are reading this, most probably have had enough of these teeth-rotting praises I kept on writing. But what can I do except to apologize? These words are the only ones that can flow out of my mind and mouth to show how magnificent it was to be loved by him.

Well, nothing significant really changed. He was still the same gentleman I met, if anything, more gentle. Just like in the beginning, he made my heart flutter every chance he gets, no matter how many years have already passed.

We built a dynasty together.

But maybe I should have known that ours were also bound to crumble like the ones that have long existed even way before us.

Days, months and years went on, I realized that he was actually the opposite of me— unlike me who was clearly not parallel with time, he held it right on the palms of his hand. I was not blind, nor was I a fool, I can clearly see how he looks like he has not aged a day, all while I was here, maturing more and more each second that passed by, the amount of signs of me aging increasing significantly.

Morax. Knowledgeable of history as if he lived it himself. Time. All these thoughts eventually congest my mind as realization dawns upon me. He was not merely a man named after the god himself— Morax was him, he was Morax.

"How appalling," I mutter with a hint of sadness and dismay in my tone. I stood in front of the mirror, fingers hovering over my face, wrinkles appearing as I scrunch it. A pair of firm arms snake its way around my lean waist, chin resting on one of my shoulders as he hums his words, "What has got your beautiful mind occupied, my beloved?"

Taking hold of his arms, I turn my body around to face him, a somewhat melancholic smile etched on my face as I look up at his much taller frame, "You are a sight to behold, even to this day." He arches one eyebrow out of amusement and curiosity, wondering why I suddenly started pouring him compliments. After all, my shyness prevents me from consistently doing so. Nonetheless, I continue speaking, "I wish... I could be with you even when everything changes into a whole new world."

I lifted a hand up to cup his cheeks and began rubbing it lovingly, a lone tear finally dropping from my eye as soon as I closed it, "but I cannot, I do not have the ability to do so... I am but a mere mortal, after all."

His eyes widen as he finally discerns my actions and concerns, immediately opening his mouth in hopes of consoling me but I beat him into speaking, "It's alright, Morax. I have been putting the pieces together for a while now. I am in no way angry. I just..." I pause, gulping hard before my lips start to quiver, "... I cannot imagine how lonely it must have been. And now... I think about it and I... I do not want to leave you alone again."

My cries eventually start becoming louder, something that is very new to the both of us, seeing as I have always been composed. Love can change a person into a whole new being. I remember a book I have read once and at the moment, I can only agree. Maybe it was the way my heart clenches at the mere thought of him walking alone, or the way I can imagine us taking our last breaths together yet I know that will never happen— but either way, it was painful.

He whispers sweet nothings to my ears, placing light kisses on my temple as he leads us to the bedroom to rest once my tears have finally ceased and I have calmed down. His hold on me gets tighter every time I let out a small hiccup due to crying, almost as if he was telling me that he was feeling the same pain as I was.

Hours pass by as we lay in silence. My tears have long dried up but we remain coped up in each other's arms.

"Would it not be interesting if you bear the name Zhongli?" I ask him in a somewhat croaky voice.

He peers down and tilts his head, "Now where did that thought come from?"

I shrug, or at least try to, and look up at the ceiling as we shift our positions to lay on our back, hands finding one another and intertwining, "Hmm... nowhere. Just a name I wanted to give you in case that you are needing a new one."

"Oh? How come it would be interesting then?"

I look at him with a comforting yet sad smile.

"Because it means it's time to leave, to go somewhere far away... and unfortunately, I will have to leave soon."

He furrowed his eyebrows together, "Do not say that. Who knows? Maybe you will be able to live a hundred years by my side. Besides, I think it sounds lonely. I do not think I would want to get reminded of the fact that you are not here with me."

I hum, "But if you bear the name I gave you, wouldn't it feel like I never went away? That no matter where your feet take you, no matter how far you go, I am and will always be with you, just as I have vowed."

The wooden door leading to my writing room slowly slides open and Morax's head peers in, an adorable smile plastered on his face, "You have been quite busy these days, beloved. I do not wish to disturb you but I am starting to long for your presence."

I let out a shameless giggle, "Alright, alright. Just let me write down a few more words while I still have ideas to input."

He peeks on the parchment paper out of curiosity, taken aback when he finds his name on it, "You are writing about us?"

I nod proudly, "My last piece."

"... But why?"

I smile and approach him, taking his hand and placing my forehead against his after he lowers his head down to my level, "I told you, did I not? I do not wish to leave the person I love with nothing. So that you will not be lonely, my words will be with you. I will be with you, always..."

"... and to tell the gods... to tell you, that I loved every second of my life with you— that it was, indeed, a good life."

"Who are you, young man? Are you my son?" I speak with a very hoarse voice, squinting my eyes at the figure in front of me, as if my poor vision will allow me to do that.

I hear a melancholic yet gentle sigh come from him before he takes my rough hands and looks afar, "Don't mind me. I'm just someone who vowed to be with you for as long as time lets us."

"Oh.... really? That’s quite endearing," I hum, "Well, may I know your name?"

"This… I think I may just have an idea to whom this book is for," Paimon trails off, looking over at the traveler who was in the same trance as her, "Paimon thinks we should let the strange person we saw a while ago give this directly to Zhongli!"

Lumine nods, turning around and starting to run towards the direction they were at previously, recalling the person named Cheng who gave them the novel they just finished reading. They were unique, dressed in layers of robes and it was almost as if they lived in the old times of Liyue. Even the way they talked and moved screamed ancient.

Just as they turned the corner, a woman near the Liuli Pavilion called them over, "Traveler! Here!" As they approach, Lumine cranes her neck to look around the area but to no avail, the strange person was long gone.

"Are you two alright?" the woman asks, much to their confusion, "I saw you talking to literal air awhile ago and I was worried you have eaten something strange."

The pair looks at each other in surprise before Paimon replies, "You didn't see anyone? Like a person dressed in the strangest attire? They dressed really anciently!"

The door of the Liuli Pavilion opens and there goes Zhongli, a calm expression morphing to an awkward one when he realizes he barged into an ongoing conversation. He apologizes for the disturbance and despite the curiosity he had upon overhearing bits of Paimon's statements, he starts his walk back to Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. At least not until he hears Paimon call his name, "Zhongli! Wait! A person named Cheng. Do you know them?"

He abruptly stops and turns to the two, eyes wide for a second before it returns to his usual demeanor, "How... how do you know of them?"

"We met them," Paimon says, as if it was the simplest thing to do, "Well, honestly, we don't know because we were apparently speaking to nothing but air! It's so odd!"

He stays still, honestly having no idea of what response he should give them because he himself found it hard to believe.

"Well anyway, they asked us to give you this nov— wait, where is it? It was just in your hands a while ago, Traveler!"

In the midst of the loud chaos made by the two in the middle of Liyue, he thinks he knows what to do and where to go now.

It was the day of the Rite of Parting, an event where he's supposed to be taking part of, even just a part of the audience. But he finds himself hanging around the Wanwen Bookhouse, eyes scanning the shelves until it stops at a familiar name engraved on the cover of a book.

"Oh! Greetings, Mr. Zhongli! I see you took a liking to a very great and romantic novel," Jifang comments as she sees the book in his hands.

He looks at her, "Is it really great?"

She gasps in delight, "Yes, indeed! Almost all of the Liyue folks have enjoyed this story! You can say it is a classic, especially for readers! Cheng definitely outdid themselves with this one! Such a mysterious person yet equally amazing. Imagine? Being able to make such a beautiful love story with Morax? They don’t mention the present name they gave Morax though, such a shame. Maybe it was due to old age, they wrote it until the last moments of their life after all. Anyway, I have to get back to work but enjoy reading that masterpiece!"

He feels his heart swell in pride upon knowing his lover had his wish come true. His nimble fingers carefully open the pages of the book and hours later, as he sat inside the Funeral Parlor after taking the novel home, he finds himself absorbing each and every word Cheng have written, the loneliness sitting idly inside him subsiding little by little.

I found solace in the countless cups of tea you brew whenever I encounter distress with my works, the endless stories you tell with a smile so beautiful that not even the most heavenly scenery can vanquish, but most of them all, the feeling of your hand intertwining with mine, providing me with serenity no one else has ever done before. Under the moonlit night of Liyue, I remember your wistful amber eyes, staring deep into my soul as you proclaim your love and desire for me. How foolish was it of me to think that I could live this life without even experiencing such warmth and intimacy?

It is a banality, really — how I wish to become a well-known writer with unique tales and yet the story I am telling is something so common to folks that they have most probably heard similar ones before. But I guess this is what it means to love and to be loved. Everything is like a cycle that just keeps on being repeated, yet we never get tired of it, of the feelings it brings. So, thank you, Morax. Words will never be sufficient to show how grateful I am to you for showing me a whole new world but I suppose this is still a way for me to give back to you.

With this little book of mine, I hope my heart reaches yours regardless of how many eras may have passed before and after us. So, my beloved, do not be too lonely without me. Even if you find yourself longing for my presence, just open this and my heart shall be with you.

This belongs to you, it always will.

And I do, as well.

#100/10 #the best oh my god

[kreidewaltz]

i "like like" you

request from anon - "Single dad headcannons for Zhongli. Reader could be his kids teacher maybe"

a/n - *dies from how cute this is* AAAAAAAAAA YES YES AND YES single dad!zhongli is everything <3 (also i'm not sure if everyone heard of the childhood phrase "like like" but it's a way that we'd say we had a romantic interest in someone as children. i'm not sure if this is exclusive to NA which is why i'm explaining it, but i thought it was a cute title hehe)

pairing - zhongli x gender neutral reader (modern au!)

word count - 8246

genre - fluff

format - headcanons + blurbs

warnings - alcohol consumption

summary - between raising his two beloved children on his own and running his own business, zhongli can't quite find the time for romance—that is until he meets you

to most, zhongli is a professional businessman and ceo of his own company

though polite and mild-mannered, he's known for his sharp intellect and quick thinking

through his hard work and dedication, his tea company which manages several popular teashops in the city, has seen immense growth and success

though he dons the face of a hardened ceo while walking through the halls of his workplace, behind closed doors zhongli is known as "papa" to his two beloved children: ganyu (5) and xiao (2)

there's absolutely nothing zhongli loves more in this world than his children

he's quite the doting father: the wealth he amasses from his successful company is poured into ravishing his children with the comfiest beds, finest toys, the best education, and college funds to last them years to let them pursue whatever they want

ganyu is more of the quiet book worm of the two: she spends time with her papa snuggled in his lap with a picture book or two eager for him to read to her

though zhongli isn't a goofy character, he'll oblige his little girl's request to "do the voices" of the various characters in the story book and relish in her giggles

she loves to draw and write stories that she often gives to zhongli; his office at work and at home are both littered with framed pictures of ganyu's best handiwork and he's proud to show them off if anyone asks

much to his surprise, ganyu is quite adept at higher level thinking and as such, he's begun to teach her how to play chess and checkers

he's let her win far too many times though, but it's the thought that counts!

xiao, on the other hand, is always on the move: crawling and stumbling on stubby hands and feet from one room of their penthouse to the next, it's hard to get him to settle down unless his papa is there to lull him to sleep

he's not one to throw tantrums, but he is known to crawl into a corner and sulk until his papa comes to get him

though zhongli wouldn't exactly describe xiao as a terrible two year old, xiao certainly was quite fussy and picky with just about everything

from xiao's toys to his food to who held him, all three categories had to be managed either by zhongli himself or his personal assistant, childe, who often babysat for him while he worked overtime or had business meetings overseas

xiao has a preference for sweet things: specifically very soft almond tofu, and though zhongli does his best to manage the diet of each of his children to be healthy and nutritious, he can't help but indulge xiao when he tugs on the fabric of his dress pants and asks for "ah-mond to-hu"

zhongli has had difficulty in getting him to start talking, but he does have a few common phrases: "papa", "ah-mond to-hu", and "go" are the ones he uses most commonly

he often attempts to pronounce ganyu's name but has difficulty and just ends up calling her "yuyu"

xiao does love when his papa manages to sit down with him and play dolls or roll cars

zhongli finds that xiao is most at peace late at night when he's rocking him to sleep in front of the large, glass window pane under a blanket of stars

both of his children are his entire world, but some days he can't help but feel a pulsing emptiness

he's had lovers in the past, but they've never worked out either because some weren't interested in becoming a parent, and some couldn't deal with his hectic and evasive schedule

apart from external reasons, zhongli himself felt like there was simply no time for romance

but that all seemed to change the day he met you

you are ganyu's first grade teacher and a very patient one at that

the first time he lays eyes upon you is on ganyu's very first day of grade school

more content utc!

zhongli wasn't an emotional man, but the manner in which ganyu clung to the leg of his charcoal dress pants, gripped his hand with all her little might, and tried to hide her sniffles in his waist had his heart crumbling in his chest. up until now, ganyu had been home schooled by private tutors and wasn't used to being in such an unfamiliar environment.

"come now, little one, no need to cry." he cooed, stooping down to cup her ruddy face within his large hands and dry her tears with his thumbs.

"papa or mister childe will be back to pick you up as soon as you're done, okay?"

to no avail, ganyu's muffled wails would refuse to cease and drew looks from other kids and parents in the schoolyard that zhongli did his best to shield her from by pulling her close and rubbing his hand soothingly up and down her back. though xiao had been left in childe's capable hands with only the slightest bit of fuss, ganyu was quite attached to zhongli and it broke his heart to see her so sad. his gentle shushing and loving kisses to her head did little to calm her down.

he'd always been quite helpless in situations were his children required some sort of softness for them to absorb their tears into. no matter how hard zhongli tried, he never quite felt like he fit into that role and the way ganyu wailed ceaselessly into his shoulder solidified that great worry in his mind.

a gentle tap twice on his shoulder brought him out of his own head and had him looking upwards.

if you had told him you were an angel, he would've believed it. calm, gentle (e/c) eyes peered back at him, matched with a reassuring smile. to top it off, a pale yellow apron hugged your body and laid overtop of your regular clothes. pinned near your breastpocket was a little name tag that read "teacher (y/n)" with stickers of flowers and hearts decorated around the border.

"if i may, sir?" you asked, whispering only to him.

zhongli struggled to maintain his composure and merely swallowed down his own awe in one gulp, before gently prying ganyu's face away from his shoulder.

"hi there!" you cooed quietly, crouching down so your palms rested on your knees and you balanced on the balls of your heels, "i'm teacher (y/n)! may i know your name?"

ganyu sniffled once, wide eyes wandering to the name tag on your apron, then to your kind smile. she looked up once to zhongli, who gave a reassuring smile and nod before replying, "ganyu," in a quiet voice, still half muffled into her papa's shirt.

"hi ganyu! that's a very pretty name for a very pretty girl," ganyu whines embarrassingly and burrows further into her papa's arms.

zhongli shot you an apologetic smile while running a soothing hand up and down ganyu's back, to which you meet him in the middle with your own equally radiant grin that needed no words to dismiss his apologies.

"do you like to play any games, ganyu? i have lots of toys in my class that you'd like: dolls, cars, robots, and there's lots of picture books too!"

at the mention of picture books, ganyu's head shot up and her glimmering eyes met yours with piqued interest. "books?" she asked, voice hoarse from wailing.

"yep! lots and lots of picture books. we can read them together until your dad comes to pick you back up, is that okay?"

gingerly, you stretch your hand outwards, palm up, in an invitation to the little girl. ganyu hesitantly looked back at zhongli as if awaiting his approval.

"go on, little deer." he gently ushered with the flat of his palm pressed against the back of her periwinkle dress.

ganyu timidly placed her tiny hand in yours and nodded once to accept your offer. you beamed brighter than the sun itself and quickly produced a napkin from a small pocket in your apron.

"come here, sunshine," you coo, bringing the soft fabric to dab at her eyes and wipe away the tracks of tears from her face with gentle motions.

ganyu was always his easier child, but she never took so kindly to strangers so quickly. zhongli watched in awe as her cries ceased and she so pliantly gripped your hand. he beamed with pride at the courage of his daughter, but also felt a part of him deflate knowing he'd have to leave her here all day.

"don't tell me i need to get a tissue for you as well, sir."

hand on your hip, there was no denying the teasing lilt to your voice as you met his eyes. upon his silence you fear that you may have overstepped your boundaries.

"a-ah forgive me it's just, you looked so sad." you hesitantly chuckled and rubbed the back of your neck.

"no, no, do not apologize. it was a humorous joke, i'll admit." he tailed off with a breathy laugh, still fixated on the way your eyes glimmered under the shimmering rays of golden, morning light.

"i must thank you, for being so kind to her. i'm grateful for that."

his heart trembled in his chest when you simply stood up with a small giggle and waved your hand dismissively.

"nonsense! it's my job to look after the little ones, besides," you paused to look down at ganyu, who still held onto your hand yet had her eyes trained diligently on her papa, "something tells me this is her first time being away from you for long."

your perceptiveness was a warm welcome to him, and he began to feel less hesitant about leaving ganyu in your care. with a pleased hum and rosy cheeks, he tried to dismiss the trembling of his fingers as the result of the beginnings of the bitter, nipping frost of autumn.

"i am zhongli."

and when you shook his hand and spoke your name, he felt the cobwebs around the rusted gears of his heart begin to rip and disintegrate. for the first time in a while, zhongli felt the faint beat of amour underneath his dress shirt.

he heads to work that day, a bit frazzled by this morning's encounter

there's no denying that he hasn't felt such a warmth in a long, long time

and he can't seen to get his mind off of how sweet you were with ganyu

childe was still preoccupied with xiao and other paperwork for the company, so zhongli is the one that picks ganyu up from school that day

he's a bit late and arrives when all the other students had already gone home

upon entering the vicinity of your classroom, he finds you sitting on a colorful beanbag chair with ganyu in your lap and a picture book in front of both of you

you read with such a soothing voice; not only that, but you did "the voices" of each character just as he does when he reads to ganyu

speaking of his daughter, her eyes are trained solely on where your pointer finger scans through the lines, and he can't help but be enamored at how easily you gained her trust

reluctantly though, he has things to do and takes her from your arms

you place your palm on his forearm—a friendly gesture—while you bid him goodbye and it's hard for him to deny how electric the area you touched made him feel

on the ride home, ganyu is more talkative than usual and the topic of her chattiness is all about you

apparently: you're the "bestest" teacher in the whole world (though zhongli has to remind her that "bestest" isn't a word) who loves to read and sing

the singing part intrigued him; with how lovely your voice had been just speaking to him, he couldn't imagine just how lovely the saccharine cadence of your singing voice must be

and so he begins to fall into a steady routine: drops ganyu off early in the morning at school in your care, then returns sheepishly around an hour late after school ends to collect her from your arms

it isn't until one day, when childe had important company matters to attend to and all his trusted babysitters were busy, that zhongli runs to pick ganyu up from school with xiao in his arms

and he discovers that you're most taken with his son

"mister zhongli, you never told me you had a son!"

intrigue lit your eyes up like a glowing lantern as you cautious peeked past the soft folds of the blue puffer jacket zhongli had carefully dressed xiao in to shield him from the bitter autumn air. his glimmering amber eyes peered up at you with bated curiosity just as your finger gently connected with his little fist.

"ah yes, apologies, teacher (y/n), it appears to have slipped my mind." he bashfully coughed into his fist and shifted xiao in his arms.

he couldn't help but let a rare smile creep onto his face as he watched you interact with xiao: the excitement laced on your face as xiao's little hand clasped around your finger, the sheer awe that had practically branded itself into your eyes as you locked gazes with xiao, it was all quite amusing to him.

"would you care to hold him?" he offered, shifting xiao's weight in his arms to extend him forward.

wordlessly, you took the toddler into your arms and giggled in tandem to the few words that did manage to slip from xiao's mouth.

"well hello to you too, little mister." your finger waggled over xiao's face as his little hands stretched up to reach it.

ganyu had been awfully quiet, watching from your side as you held her brother so fondly. zhongli had never seen her make such a face before: little lips turned downwards and brows furrowed to crease in the middle of her forehead. her fist clutched the soft fabric of your apron and it seemed that she'd tug every now and then. a particularly harsh tug got your attention...and zhongli's as well as you jolted with xiao in your arms.

"little deer!" he hissed, swooping in to scoop her up into his arms. "i apologize dearly, ganyu doesn't usually act like this." the last part seemed directed moreso towards the little girl in his arms, who shamefully buried her face into the crook of her father's neck.

you, however, seemed to realize exactly the intentions behind her actions immediately. "care to switch, mister zhongli?" you asked, extending out his son to him.

"please you need not address me so formally, just zhongli is fine." he countered, wordlessly shifting ganyu so her little hands stretched out towards your body.

"you as well, (y/n) is just fine." you smiled at him after exchanging the two children in your arms.

ganyu immediately melted in your embrace and slung her around around your neck, whereas xiao began to wriggle in zhongli's broad arms and babbled nonsense.

"i think she was just a little jealous." you giggled and whispered discreetly for only zhongli's ears.

"my, that's quite unlike her. i do apologize for her behavior though."

zhongli was quite sure he would've said more if not for how tender you looked with ganyu in your arms. your deft fingers gently tucked a stray lock of her hair from her head behind her ear and a pleasant smile had painted itself upon your lips. your very, very, soft looking lips.

but he was getting sidetracked, far too sidetracked.

"i-i do believe we must be going now." he cursed himself for his unusually unkept manner and hoisted xiao once more in his arms.

"oh yes! ahaha sorry about that. come on, ganyu, your papa's waiting." you stooped down and usher the girl away from your arms into her papa's hands.

ganyu reluctantly let go of your clothes and clung to zhongli's leg with each of her little fists full of the silk, charcoal material of his dress pants. zhongli relished in how warmly and fondly you looked upon his children, but not before realizing how dark it had gotten outside.

before he said his goodbyes and turned to walk through your classroom door, zhongli chose to make an offer that fell perfectly in tandem to the unnatural thump of his heart: "would you care for a ride home?"

zhongli ends up giving you a ride home that day (and bites back his amusement when you eagerly gawk in awe at his fancy, sleek, black car equipped with a touchscreen gps and heated seats

with your address in his gps, zhongli ensures that you're home within thirty minutes, no more no less

his routine continues, though you did shyly ask to see xiao a few more times and he would happily oblige your request by letting xiao tag along when he'd pick up ganyu

you've also grown on him quite considerably:

your quick wit, tender kindness, and complete and utter patience is a stark contrast to the world of stoic business that zhongli is deeply familiar with

not to mention you make conversation flow so easily, to the point where zhongli felt that he could sit and listen to your voice forever, even if his conversations with you only lasted briefly and were about his kids and your jobs, before he'd leave with ganyu in tow

he finds himself staying a bit longer with every pickup, and you're more than happy to indulge him just a little longer each time

zhongli often brings you samples of tea that his company had not yet put into wide distribution; majority of the time your feedback is very positive with the occasional wonky blends or two

there's something pulling him to you and for once, zhongli doesn't feel himself pushing against the tide

even his children have noticed how fondly their papa looks at you

ganyu once asked him during a game of chess if he "like liked" you, and after asking her for a brief explanation of what that meant, he nearly choked on the cup of oolong tea he'd been sipping

though his daughter's words are childish, they haunt him while he lays awake at night and wonders: does he really have a romantic interest in you?

his thoughts are answered oddly enough the very next day, when he goes to pick ganyu up from school and a very irate looking person who isn't you, is pushing ganyu into his arms and scolds him for his lack of punctuality

ganyu explains on the drive home that the "subtute" (she can't quite pronounces "substitute" yet, as zhongli corrects her and helps her sound it out while peeping through the rearview window at traffic stops) teacher had replaced you for the day, and you were sick and home

sick, and all alone

and something tugs at his heart once he's fed and lulled his children to sleep and leans against his counter with only his thoughts to keep him company

he's not one to give into impulse easily, but with only a quick phone call to childe, he's tugging on his jacket and slipping into his car with your home in mind

zhongli felt a bit...guilty, about forgetting to delete your address from his gps. he'd be sure to apologize properly with some extra tea and goods from his shop. a shopping bag filled with tissues and ingredients for rice congee jostled in the passenger seat when his tire hit a pot hole. he wasn't quite sure what you'd like, but rice congee had always helped ganyu feel better when she'd fallen ill.

his car pulled up to your modest, warm-looking home; flower beds decorate the front yard, along with little gnomes and garden decorations. if he were to look up "welcoming" in a dictionary, he'd find a picture of your house as an example. zhongli stopped the engine and exited the car with the bag in tow, heart in his throat and palms clammy and sweaty. he's a grown man who can strike a business deal with anyone and dominates bargaining offers, but still sheepishly hesitates to knock on the wood of your door, illuminated only by the nearby streetlamps and a little metal lantern that hung to the side.

against his better judgement, his knuckles find their way onto the wood of your door and knock thrice.

his breath caught itself in his throat the minute the door creaked open and your familiar face greets him.

you're bundled up in warm looking pajamas, snowy bunny slippers on each of your feet, and a thick, pale blue blanket draped over you body like a hooded cloak. all in all, you looked quite adorable if not for the redness in your eyes and obvious struggle to breath right.

"z-zhongli! what a p-pleasant surprise!" there was obvious enthusiasm behind your voice and yet its gravelly nature couldn't lie about how awfully sick you seemed.

"i apologize for coming so late, would you be opposed to me coming inside?"

you open your mouth to respond but are immediately engulfed by a fit of coughs, to which you motion for zhongli to come no closer when his arms automatically go to catch you should you fall.

"i-i'm quite sick...i'd hate for you to catch it."

with a sheepish, boyish smile that he admittedly hadn't worn in years, zhongli held up the plastic bag with his index finger and shrugged. "i do have a strong immune system."

that seemed to be enough for you, who gestured inwards with a giggle and shut the door behind him.

your living room is relatively clean except for the occasional scatter of books and sky-high pile of kiddy drawings on a nearby table.

"excuse the mess, i-i haven't really had time to clean up, heh..." you whisper meekly, tugging the soft fleece of the blanket to conceal your face.

zhongli can't help but find the action adorable and tugged the fabric back from your face to revel in your gleaming (e/c) eyes.

"please, i insist that your home is quite lovely, (y/n)."

you emerged from your blanket burrito, embarrassment written all over your face. you eyed him curiously with a warbled smile on your lips. "are you here to discuss ganyu's progress? i'm not feeling the best right now but i am still thankfully s-sound of mind."

"no not at all, i simply...ganyu informed me that you weren't at school today and i thought i would come by and prepare some tea and rice congee for you. they are things that have helped my daughter and myself in the past so-"

"zhongli, a-are you sure? i know i appear to be a mess, but i-i'll be fine! i really would hate to keep you from your kids."

you truly were so considerate, and he knew now that he'd absolutely hate to leave you on your own to bear the brunt of your illness.

"i promise, they are fast asleep and well taken care of. i'd like to help you out as well, if you'd indulge me." much like a business deal, his hand automatically stuck itself out forwards. but when you slipped your warm hand into his, the "business" element faded away and left something much more tender and supple than he could ever recognize.

a mumbled "thank you" is all you can muster before a fit of coughs took hold of you once more.

"come now, you should be resting in bed. i shall prepare the tea and congee," he paused and pressed his forehead against yours despite the lurch of his heart upon contact with your hot skin, "hmm, you are far too warm. your fever must break and then you shall be alright."

your sleepy mumbled did far too much to his hammering heart as you trailed off into your bedroom, zhongli's hand still in yours as if you hadn't realized. your room was quite modest with a bookshelf or two lining the walls, but you ignored the pile of texts on the ground beside your bed and clambered up onto the mattress under the sheets.

"i'll be in the kitchen should you need anything." he warned just as your warmth disappeared from his hand.

a muffled "okay" from the pile of blankets underneath your body let him set off to prepare the tea and congee for your consumption, all while his hand burned pleasantly with the remnants of your touch.

with muffle thoughts and flushed cheeks, he got to work. as the tea water began to boil and his large hands stirred a pot of congee, his mind began to slip under into his deep depth of thoughts. here he was, a grown man, who still treated love like a lovesick teenaged boy. it was most shameful to him to be acting in such a manner, but it seemed to be almost out of his control. there was no use fighting the vivid blush or panting of his heart when you'd connect eyes and talk about anything.

so lost in his thoughts, zhongli had nearly forgotten about the kettle on the stove and scrambled to turn the heat off just as the congee had finished boiling.

"archons above..." he mumbled and dragged a hand over his face.

just what were you doing to him?

he'd long since discarded his work blazer on the coat rack near your front door and rolled up the sleeves of his white dress shirt to better accommodate the cooking space. this, however, revealed the slightly embarrassing dragon-style sleeve tattoo on his right arm he had gotten so many years ago.

much to his chagrin, it seemed to be the first thing you noticed upon his entry with the congee and tea into your room.

bundled up under layers of blankets, you immediately locked onto the intricate lines of gold and charcoal ink that layered his arm.

"such a pretty tattoo..." you mumbled and tentatively stuck your hand out to trace over the detailing.

"a mistake of my youth, but i'm glad you find beauty in it." he hummed in an attempt to ignore your electrifying touch and set the tray of congee in front of you along with the tea by your bedside.

"i really can't thank you enough, this was all very sweet of you to do for me."

your body shifted to sit upwards only to wobble and collapse back downwards onto the soft sheets with a hissed "oof". zhongli's quick reflexes ensured that the tray holding the bowl of congee wouldn't have spilled all over your sheets.

"please, i insist that i help you. do not overexert yourself further." he gently chided and pressed one of his large hands to your shoulders, leaning you back against a fortress of pillows.

"spoon feeding me now, are we? i feel like a little kid." you wriggled under the sheets and lolled your head to the side just as zhongli pulled up a chair to your bedside from your desk.

"well you must remember: i am a father of two, so i'm quite accustomed to this."

your lips parted to greet the ceramic spoonful of congee, eagerly swallowing the warm food. zhongli's keen eyes picked up on a smidge that had caught on your bottom lip and instinctively went to swipe away at it with his thumb, palm cupping your cheek, only to feel the moment your breath caught in your throat and locked gazes with you. he's sure his cheeks are flushed a rosy red and judging by the pounding of his heart in his ears, he's quite sure you heard it too.

"i- um-, apologies that was invasive-"

"no, no! y-you're alright, don't worry i just got a little flustered...it's been a while since someone has treated me so kindly, i suppose is all." you quickly reassured and placed a palm over his knuckles.

his mind wandered back to ganyu's question, and though he's not quite sure of a solid answer, as you babble on about how sweet ganyu is while he spoonfeeds you congee and helps you sip tea, he does begin to think that what he feels around you can be described as "like liking".

zhongli commits himself to staying by your side until you feel better

which means he does end up falling asleep at your bedside in the chair with his arms folded on your bed

as soon as he's awake, he's immediately on the phone with childe, apologizing profusely and reassuring him that he'll add on extra pay and more vacation days for the poor ginger

you're also an apologizing mess, but zhongli quickly shuts you down and reassures you that he'd rather have kept you company than you be all by your lonesome

he leaves that day with awakened butterflies swimming around in his stomach, but not without stopping at home first to greet his children and get them ready for the day

ganyu's questions about where her papa went are relentless and much unlike her usual quiet and shy self

whereas xiao clings to his pants leg for most of the time it takes zhongli to get ganyu ready for school

since his first visit, you often invite zhongli over

the invites are masked under "discussing ganyu's education" but in reality, you two sit and discuss so many things over a pot of freshly brewed tea

he finds himself coming to you a lot with new proposals and ideas for his company and your input almost always results in success! (except for the one time you mistakenly thought tea from pine trees would be a good idea, yikes)

his visits to your classroom are also a running ordeal, and he's begun driving you home as well even if you insist on not being a burden

"it's hardly a burden if i'm offering, now come, i wouldn't want you walking alone during nightfall."

even his children had begun to notice how close their papa and you were

ganyu would always ask to accompany him if she knew he was heading out to see you, and some times he'd have to indulge her because how can he say no to his little girl? (you're more than happy to have ganyu over at your house either way)

and xiao has surprisingly taken quite a liking to you after you showed up with your own homemade almond tofu and asked him to be your first taste tester (your almond tofu is now xiao approved)

you grow to become close friends with zhongli, and he finds that time seems to slip from his hands whenever he's engaged in a conversation with you

everything you touch, all the topics you speak of, they feel so incredibly warm in his chest

the more you talk, the closer you get

and one day, zhongli finally gets the courage to invite you over for dinner at his penthouse

"papa has a date?" ganyu asked with an innocent tilt of her head to complete the look. her little feet dangled over the end of the bathroom counter she sat on, and brushed the edge of her pretty pink dress as childe fixed a matching pink bow into her periwinkle locks.

"you bet he do-"

"no, little deer, papa does not have a date." zhongli scolded and eyed childe with a sharp look in his eye as he fixed his charcoal tie in the ceiling high mirror beside the bathroom counter.

"oh come now, mister zhongli, what part of this isn't a date? i haven't seen you so nervous since xiao's birth." childe poked and hoisted ganyu from the counter into the air. "isn't that right wittle ganyu wanyu? aww look how pretty you look!" childe cooed in his baby voice and spun her around in the air, making sure to rile up a good amount of giggles from her before he set her down. ganyu scurried quickly out of the bathroom lest she be subject to any more of childe's antics.

"this isn't a date, merely a dinner with a friend and my children." zhongli replied once ganyu was out of earshot

childe snorted and leaned against the bathroom counter with his arms crossed. "yeah, a friend that you run straight to for advice on tea flavors rather than the actual advisors that work for you."

"it's nothing more than a dinner, i can assure you that."

"oh? really? what's with the fancy getup then?"

it was rare for zhongli to feel such a buildup of irritation, cringing as it manifested into a nervous, weighted pit in his stomach. he owed a lot to childe, but as of right now he was being little more than a fly hovering in front of his face.

"alright, alright, i know when to call it quits, boss," childe raised his hands in surrender, metaphoric white flag waving pathetically, and strolled past zhongli on his way out of the bathroom, "i'm a phone call away if you need anything." he clamped a hand down on zhongli's shoulder with an encouraging smile and headed out to the front door.

zhongli would be damned if he said he didn't need the extra encouragement—his previous dates had gone running for the hills once they spotted xiao's toys or ganyu's coloring books, and yet you willingly chose to come over and tread the grounds of the unknown despite knowing he had kids. it thawed his heart ever so slightly.

"papa, is mister childe not eating with us?" zhongli broke from his thoughts upon feeling the slight tug of his dress pants via ganyu's little hand.

"not today, little deer," his knees stooped to collect ganyu into his arms and hold up her against his chest, "but we do have another important guest, so i must ask that you be on your best behavior. could you do that for papa?"

ganyu nodded feverishly, periwinkle locks that had been styled up into a pretty ponytail bounced with each motion of her head.

"very good." he hummed and smoothed down her frazzled locks.

as if on cue, xiao stumbled in past the bathroom door on shaky legs with his arms outstretched and eyes wide, watery, and wandering. how was it possible that zhongli had contributed to the birth of something so adorable? it was a question he often asked himself at moments like this when his children managed to wriggle their way into his heart.

"alright, little one, i know, i know." his back groaned as he shifted ganyu to one arm and stooped down to hoist xiao with his other arm.

xiao instantly went limp against the heat of his father, little dress shirt and clip-on-tie scrunched up against his coiled body as he pressed himself inwards to zhongli's chest. zhongli's amber eyes roamed the peaceful visages of his children, comfortable and safe in his arms. and for a moment, he recalled the many times you had held his children in such a similar manner—as if they were your own, with such tender, supple love and adoration in your eyes.

the gentle pound of three knocks against the door of his penthouse broke him from his thoughts.

"is that the important guest, papa?" ganyu asked, stretching her neck to peer at the door from around the hallway.

a hummed laugh bubbled up from the depths of his throat as he nodded and began hurriedly pacing towards the door. "it is indeed, and i'm sure you'll be quite excited to see who it is, little deer."

despite the outward courage and nonchalance he displayed, his insides were a gooey mess of nervousness that he hadn't felt in years. he managed to thickly swallow down a dry patch of air that had been caught in his throat and shuffled his children around in his arms so that his clammy hand could grasp the cool metal of the door lock.

the wood pulled open and zhongli felt his breath hitch once more in his throat.

elegant cloths draped over your skin and hugged and pooled around your body like an antique fountain. your hair had been styled so uniquely, and on your face lay your usual tender smile, and he couldn't help but bite back the thought that you were dangerously attractive.

"papa close mouf!" xiao's stubby little hand moved to zhongli's jaw and unceremoniously pushed upwards; he hasn't even realized that his jaw had gone slack.

"he's right you know, you'll swallow flies if you keep your mouth open like that." you quipped and smoothed over the top of xiao's fluffy hair, allowing your nails to scratch gently over zhongli's skin for just a brief moment (he'd have buckled at the knees if not for his children in his arms).

"need a hand?" you giggled and held your hands out in an invitation to him.

ganyu immediately clambered forwards, joy illuminated in her eyes as you scooped her into your arms.

"teacher (y/n)! are you here for dinner with us?" ganyu asked, fisting the fabric of your clothes.

you meet zhongli's stunned gaze with a slightly amused glimmer in your eyes and speak unspoken words to him in the brief moment your eyes connect, before you turn to look at ganyu.

"i sure am!" you reply and fix her bow into place. "my you look so pretty! your brother looks dashing too." you cooed and gently pinched the soft chubbiness of xiao's cheek.

"and your father..." your eyes meet his once again and zhongli's insides become a mess, "...looks quite handsome." you packaged a coy smile for him and fixed the silky fabric of his tie back down into the center from its crooked position.

zhongli managed to snap out of his stupor and moved to pick up your hand. your mouth opened to intervene and ask what he was doing, but the soft, tender flesh of his lips against your knuckles halted all and any questions you might have had.

"thank you, for coming this evening. you look beyond stunning." his voice vibrates against the skin of your hand, and you know you're a goner when flashes of his smile hit your heart like a beacon.

zhongli's not exactly known for being a mess but he can't help but want to impress you

he's pulled out all the stops for making this dinner go as wonderfully as possible

all the dishes are hand-made himself, and the desserts were made with the help of ganyu and the slight help of xiao (it was a challenge to not let him near the almond tofu though)

despite the aggravated pounding of his heart, he does his best to be a gentleman: leads you to the dining room by the hand, pulls out your chair for you, and pours you sparkling water all with xiao in one arm

the dinner overall goes quite well!

just like before, conversation is quite easy between you and zhongli despite the lingering alluring tension in the air between the two of you

but in addition to that, zhongli admires how you communicate with his children

ganyu has a tendency to ramble about things she really likes, and so you patiently nodded along as she recounted the story of a novel her papa had read to her the other night in between bites of crystal shrimp and adeptus' temptation

and upon discovering xiao's love for sweets, you were more than happy to slide him an extra portion of your almond tofu just to see the elated glimmer in his golden eyes (and though the action didn't go unnoticed by zhongli, he let it slide just this one since he found it adorable)

but there were a few hiccups here and there

xiao accidentally managed to spill his juice over his bib and the sensation is enough to have him sniffling

but before zhongli can react, you're already scooping him into your arms and rocking him back and forth until his tears had settled

ganyu had accidentally dropped a plate while helping her papa carry the dishes to the sink, and like before, you swoop in and immediately comfort her while zhongli hurries to grab a cutesy bandage and a dustpan for the broken porcelain

your skin connects briefly with his over the course of the meal as you reached for salt or swooped in to wipe food away from xiao's chubby little face

the tension between zhongli and you is so palpable that he was sure if he breathed in too much he'd be consumed by you

xiao had immediately fallen asleep at the table, and ganyu had been tiredly rubbing her eyes

but you'd taken the liberty of bringing each child to their bedroom and let zhongli redress them in their night clothes

and as he watched from their bedroom doors, how you tucked ganyu in and kissed her forehead goodnight, and made sure xiao had his stuffed bird and fleece blanket, he knew that his mind had come up with an answer to the question that had been haunting him for months

there was no denying that the question ganyu had asked him a while ago was one he could answer now

zhongli finished pouring a second glass of wine just as you emerged from the hallway to the kid's rooms.

"wine?" he offers, stretching out a glass to you from across the immaculate amber marble counter.

your brows furrow in thought before easing with a shrug of acceptance. "sounds lovely, what kind?" you ask between sugary inhales of the sweet liquid.

"osthmanthus. a fine brew i save for exemplary occasions such as this one." he smiled and scooped your hand into his to once again press his lips to the back of your knuckles. "have i told you how lovely you looked tonight?" he hummed with a coy brush of his nose against your hand.

"you have, but i wouldn't mind hearing it again from you." you smile against the rim of your glass and take a modest sip.

"come, the view from the veranda will be far more to your liking." his elbow jutted outwards in true gentlemanly fashion.

"i feel like royalty, you're quite the gentleman, zhongli." you teased and looped your arm through his.

"ah, that pleases me to hear. you deserve nothing less than the best treatment." he hummed and slid open the glass door for you to step out onto the balcony.

his forearms found their way pressed against the metal railing of the balcony overlooking the many twinkling lights of the bustling city below, wine glass still in hand. cars screeched and lights flared vivaciously and yet nothing could draw his attention away from the manner in which the world reflected like a kaleidoscope in your glimmering eyes.

despite the easy smile on his face, his heart nearly jolted out of his chest when you melted into his side and leaned your warmth onto his body. his arm unconsciously moved to shelter your body from the slight chilly evening breeze and it's when your eyes lock that he realizes just how close the two of you are.

zhongli set his wine glass down with trembling hands, not trusting himself to hold a proper grip on the glass without it slipping from his hands. much to his surprise, you downed the entire contents and placed the glass on a nearby table.

"the wine tasted really good...everything tasted really good tonight." you mumbled, more fixated on the structure of his face than the lingering droplets of wine in your mouth. "thank you for inviting me." with a smile warmer than a summer's day, your lips curled upwards and met his heart in the middle.

he was sure you could hear the aggressive pounding of his heart with how your ear had pressed itself against his chest.

"the pleasure was all mine, i insist. you were lovely to host for dinner." his fingers daringly moved upwards to swipe a bead of wine that had clung to your lips. the spur of confidence he'd been looking for all night had finally dropped into his lap when your hand overlapped his and allowed him to cup your cheek.

"ganyu had informed me of quite a peculiar term a while ago." he murmured, not breaking eye contact or removing his hand from your cheek.

"what would that be?" there's an inquisitive, invisible dance of tension beneath your layered words; unmistakable in his eyes no less.

"she inquired as to whether or not i...'like liked' you," your adorable giggles muffled by his palm interrupt him and he finds himself smiling along.

"ah yes, i'm aware that the manner by which i address this is a bit...childish but-"

"but nothing, zhongli," you murmured and pressed your palm against his lips to silence him, "keep going, it's sweet."

"very well," he chuckled and maneuvered your body so your chest molded against his and his hands settled at your hips.

"i've given much thought to her question, and i think that now i must admit..." his voiced mused in tandem to the gentle rising of his hands to cup your cheeks and lock gazes with you; deep enough to where his heart began to pound at the swell in your pupils,

"you occupy all crevices and cracks of my mind every hour of every day, and it's beyond any shadow of a doubt that i do indeed 'like like' you."

the thick bands of tension had finally come undone and what was left were the tender pulsations of both of your synchronous hearts. your lips parted and fell agape at his honesty and tender words masked beyond a childish shield.

"i-i recognize the implications of my words and by no means do i wish to force-"

"i do too."

his ramble is immediately halted with your gentle touch on his cheek to mimic his tender hold on your face. peering at your face reveals an endless treasure trove of piled on affections ravished by the illuminations of the city lights. your free hand gently wraps around his tie and tugs him impossibly closer before you whisper just under your breath,

"i like like you too."

his breathed hitched rigidly in his throat, the familiar jumpy nervousness coming back to bite him as his lips part to ask, "may i kiss you?"

he only needed a single nod of your head to dive inwards and slot his lips against yours. the immediate connection of skin sent a tingling feeling of electricity through his veins; a feeling that he thought he'd long forgotten. his eyes slipped shut and he let himself drown in your ocean. he'd lost count of how many times he'd laid awake at night imagining this exact scenario; how tender and supple your lips would feel against his or the reverent warmth emanating from your body.

your hands entangled themselves in his chocolatey locks just as his large hand moved downwards to splay against the small of your back. his lips hugged yours with such gentle intimacy, you'd swear you'd come undone in his arms if your embrace continued any longer.

a sudden clutter of noise drew your faces back from each other, breathy and flustered in the face. you longingly stare at each other for what felt like an eternity before you remembered the noise. both of your heads whipped towards the sliding door only to see a flustered ganyu whose tiny hands covered over xiao's eyes, still in their night clothes. a vivid blush covered the span of her nose and cheeks, and a single glance to the left would point to a tipped-over vase as the source of noise. she most likely knocked it over trying to back away from the sliding door.

"she must have seen us..." you gasp apologetically, but zhongli is quick to quell your worries with nothing but a gentle smile.

"i-i'm sorry p-papa..." ganyu stuttered and folded in on herself, clutching the hand of her brother tightly as zhongli slid the door open.

"it's alright, little deer. but you and your brother should really be asleep right now. it's quite late." he cooed, stooping down to be at eye level with her.

xiao shrugged ganyu's hands away from his eyes and stumbled towards you with outstretched hands out onto the balcony.

"aww, i think they missed you, zhongli." you mused and scooped the toddler into your arms, who melted into the crook of your neck.

"perhaps you mean that they missed you, (y/n)." he chuckled and gathered his daughter into his arms.

his hand guided you by the small of your back to the railing once more, a child in each of your arms. zhongli's arm maneuvered itself to wrap around your shoulders with ganyu nestled comfortably in his other arm. you gratefully leaned into his side and pressed a chaste kiss to his jaw as a sign of thanks. in that moment, something in zhongli finally clicked perfectly into place when he realized just how much of a family member you'd become.

"teacher (y/n)?" ganyu called, cheek smushed against her papa's shoulder.

"yes?" you hummed, hoisting the now sleeping xiao in your arms.

"do you and my papa...like like each other?"

zhongli can't help but fall into your depths when you look at him so lovingly with his child in your arms, and there's no hesitation in his reply nor does he break his gaze from you when he replies, "yes, we do."

he really like likes you.

date published: october 21st, 2021

#im inlove #i love this fic very much #my heart is mushy

[kreidewaltz]

then can I get xiao x fem!reader hc about the reader avoid xiao because she doesn't want to bother him with traveler? she will make stupid excuse whenever xiao want to meet her ( ≧Д≦)

keeping your distance

xiao

he didn't know when you started avoiding him, but when the realization sank in, a deep pang of hurt settled in his heart.

xiao certainly did think it was odd how your visits to wangshu inn seemed to be growing less frequent over time, but he didn't dare think too deeply about it. it wasn't like you were tied to him, anyway; he was just a friend you visited whenever you were free and had nothing else to do. you were never obligated to see him.

but your weekly visits was like an unspoken role between you two. you would find him standing by the balcony, and you'll talk his ear off about the events that happened the past week, your mindless chatter filling the silence he's grown to be unfamiliar with ever since he met you.

it was something he always looked forward to in his bland everyday life. and it was gone, just like that.

and at the very least, he wanted to know why. had he done something wrong? did you get sick of him? did you already... find someone else better to spend time with?

“-an you hear me out?”

xiao was snapped out of his thoughts the moment the voice finally registered in his head. unfortunately, it wasn't the voice he wanted to hear.

a sigh parted his lips as he spun on his heel, turning away from the balcony to face the traveler standing idly with paimon floating beside her.

“what is it?” he spoke, an exasperated edge to his tone, and lumine cocked her head to the side in confusion, but ultimately decided it wasn't worth mentioning.

she displayed a serious expression, meaning nothing but business. “there's something i need help with...”

xiao was someone you held dear, and you thought he also liked you... to an extent.

maybe not as much as you did for him, but enough that he doesn't complain when you talk his ear off. he doesn't care if you talk about the most unimportant of things, or if you demand his protection when you venture into dangerous ruins. he complies with whatever you ask of him, and you've come to find he's a great listener, even if he doesn't talk much.

xiao was a great guy.

that's why you couldn't help but think he was too good for you, at times.

he was an adeptus, for archons' sake! he was truly someone amazing! and you were just some... chatty adventurer who can't fight.

he was fit for someone better. someone on even ground. someone extraordinary. someone like... the traveler.

you've heard of her. everyone had. she was the hero of mondstadt, the warrior who reigned triumphant in a battle against one of the four winds. she was strong—and not to mention, quite pretty. she has even caught the attention of that fatui harbinger.

...and now xiao too, it seems.

compared to her, you were nothing. she truly did look deserving to be on the spot beside xiao, unlike yourself. they were great together.

but was it wrong to want him for yourself anyway?

“okay,” you murmured to yourself, chanting a pep talk in your head. “you can do this. it's just xiao—just because he met lumine, it doesn't mean he'll throw me away. we're still very good friends!”

you searched through your bag, making sure you had packed the almond tofu, and headed off to the usual spot where you meet him. you hummed a cheery tune, feeling positive with your insecurities melting away, until you arrived.

you just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time, that's all.

“-ank you so much!” you heard faintly, but all sounds were muted under the sound of your whole world crashing down. your vision turned blurry when you caught sight of interlocked hands, a small smile tugged on his lips, and the red flush on her ears.

you didn't want to watch, so you hurried to run away.

“[name]?”

you halted in your tracks, dumbfounded. slowly, you turned around to face xiao, but without meeting his eyes. he stepped forward, sending lumine a final look.

“you didn't visit for a while,” xiao remarked, his walking pace a tad rushed from eagerness—not that you could point it out.

“oh, um, yes... i didn't have time to...” you laughed nervously, scratching your cheek. heat crawled up to your neck, and it did not feel pleasant. “actually, i think i'm also busy today after all! so i think i'll go...” you scrunched the sleeve of your bag, beginning to keep your distance.

he furrowed his brows, perplexed. “you... just got here,” he breathed out, hesitant to let you leave so quickly.

“yes, but i have to, uh... walk my pet fish!” you cringed right as you finished saying it, and xiao's expression convolutes further into confusion.“w-well, i'm really glad you're doing well!” you left it at that, hastily backing away before he could get too close and notice your misty eyes. “i'll see you again soon!”

he parted his mouth, reluctant to speak. “...i see. have a safe travel.”

“of c-course!”

and so, you left as quickly as you came.

(you didn't pick up on the disappointment in his voice, but lumine sure did, and watched by the sidelines with a worried look.)

“...you've done me a lot of favors,” lumine started, twiddling her fingers. “do you... perhaps want me to help with this problem...?” she offered, cracking a sympathetic smile. xiao perked up.

“...if you will.”

lumine's logic was straightforward.

“she can't escape from you if you ambush her house.”

not the best wording without context, but xiao got what he needed, and he did just as told.

...so now you were caged between a pair of arms, definitely unable to escape.

the situation probably wouldn't make sense even if you explained it from the start, so you won't bother to do it.

“haha... xiao... i never thought i'd see you here...” you said truthfully, facing the side so as not to brush noses with the male mere inches away from your body. “what are you doing inside my house? this is considered trespassing...” you trailed off in an attempt to steer the conversation away from the most pressing concern.

“you're avoiding me.”

xiao really couldn't read the room, could he?

“avoiding your face, you mean? if i did not, we would be- kissing!” you squeaked, pushing his chest with both hands. “could you back off a bit, you're a bit too close...”

the hot breath fanning against your ear was not unwelcome, but this was not the time for that.

instead, he went even closer. “did i do something wrong?”

“no, not at all! xiao, if this is your idea of a joke, it isn't funny-”

causing you several heart attacks was not funny in the slightest. your heart needed a break, so please, let it rest for a few seconds before breaking it.

“then why?”

his voice trembled, and you stopped shrugging him off.

the atmosphere turned somber.

his arms fell limp beside you, and he rested his head on your shoulder, utterly exhausted. worried, you raised an arm to pat his back.

“...i was beginning to think you despised me...” he admitted, weak in your touch.

you grew panicked, feeling the urgency to deny his claims. “that's not true!” you replied, finding the idea preposterous. “that's... that's not it at all...”

“then what else could it be?” he released a hurmorless chuckle. “you've grown tired of me, haven't you?”

“i thought you were the one who got tired of me!” you blubbered, entirely honest. “you... you have her already.”

he rose his head from your shoulder. “‘her’?”

“the... the traveler,” you stammered, too ashamed to lock gazes with him. “you're fond of her... aren't you?”

“...what on earth are you talking about?”

“it's true, isn't it? i saw you hold her hand...!”

“...she was grateful for my help,” he responded calmly, cupping your cheek. “that's why she did it. it was an expression of gratitude.”

“...that doesn't immediately mean... you don't like her that way...” you mumbled, cringing at your own weak arguments.

“[name]. look at me.”

begrudgingly, your eyes slid to his amber ones, gleaming under the moonlight.

“she might have held my hand, but you're the only one i would touch like this.”

warmth surged in your cheeks. “...that's... kind of...”

“what?” he tilted your chin, thumb brushing against your lips. “do you wish for proof?”

#crying #sobbing

[kreidewaltz]

tangina i hate you genshin /j

#HUJJSKSKDDKELE #my mood #went #down like down down

[kreidewaltz]

how my childe summons went: -

me:

[kreidewaltz]

raiden shogun - plane of euthymia (posters)

we have another set of brutalism design posters by me, this time its the almighty raiden shogun

i was supposed to make 4 but i got lazy so there you go

let me know which character i should make posters of next

[kreidewaltz]

HELPSJSHS so izuki is popular w the girls but they run away when they see his joke book :] I LOVE YOU DATE ME

#hes into puns #i will laugh at everything izuki im the perfect girl

[kreidewaltz]

manga izuki is making me feel hnhnhmhmgn

#i read the last few parts of the manga #THEY LOOK GOOD I WANNA READ IT FROM THE START #im damaged the ending #its the perfect ending i just don't want it to end :(

[kreidewaltz]

iwaizumi and kuroo :(

#having a bad brainrot about them #i miss hq and i miss reading fics abt them the most

[kreidewaltz]

SPOKEN BY YOU (AS THOUGH IT’S SACRED) — IWAIZUMI HAJIME X READER

synopsis: iwaizumi goes to college in california despite everything that tells him not to. it’s there that he begins to be forged by the people he meets, but most importantly, you.

word count: 7.6k

warnings: a few swear words, very very light angst

note: hello this is my first long fic on tumblr in a very long time but i deeply love iwa <3 appreciate all of you and i hope you enjoy!!

when he moved to california, iwaizumi fell in love with the beach; the feeling of sand settling beneath his feet, the chilling ocean breeze, the rippling of waves over his skin and the sound of the crashing water curling into his ears. when iwaizumi, terrified, nervous iwaizumi, flew halfway across the world to arrive on new soil, he didn’t expect his legs to carry him to the coast, and that here, he’d feel the most at home he had in a while.

and yet, wind kissing his skin, the scent of sea salt resting somewhere in his nose, he can feel himself start to calm down. suddenly, the swirling of the earth seems to slow for a while, the ground—though rough to step through and constantly catching on his heels as he walks—feels steadier.

and so he walks along the intersection of land and water, his shoes dangling off of his fingers as the ocean laps against his exposed skin.

he’s spent nearly a week here now, texting oikawa and everyone else over half-broken messenger apps, getting videos sent to him of mattsun and makki screaming their ‘miss you’s over music in their cars, calling his parents after late-night dinners, hoping to catch them after the sun rises in japan. he’s lonely, though he’d hate to admit it, and he misses the sound of his friends’ or his family’s voices when they weren’t entangled in static and twisting through his phone speakers.

and so he keeps walking, one slightly unsteady foot in front of another, and lets the beach carry him wherever it may wish. and though he knows that in just one more week school will start and things will get better, there’s a terrible nagging feeling in him that maybe they won’t—that maybe, another few weeks will pass and he’ll still be walking along the beach alone, that most nights will be spent in his apartment with his laptop in front of him, that maybe chasing his goals and his dreams for the past three years of his life will tumble before him in nothing more than a wish to go home.

he hates his nagging feelings, he really does.

and because he’s living half in his head and half in the soil, because he’s terribly nervous and, no matter how much he loves the beach for how it steadies his breath, he’ll never quite be steady enough in the sand, his shoulder bumps into someone who’s standing in the water, the ripples of the ocean just barely resting around their ankles, and he sends both of them stumbling through the waves. apologies spill past his lips as he goes to grab them before they lose their balance and fall into the water, hand resting somewhere on their back as he pulls both of them back upwards—but he’s just as quick to remove it as he was to place it, a terrible bit of redness biting at the tips of his ears from the- well, not even just the touch, really, it’s everything about the situation.

“shit,” he mumbles again as you turn to him, hair a little messier in the breeze than it might’ve been a few seconds prior, but a light smile resting on your face. still, the words i’m sorry manage to snake over his tongue again, as though curses and apologies are the only thing he can manage out of his throat.

“it’s okay!” you say, laughter sweet and light on each little syllable, your hands waving him off in front of you, “you caught me, didn’t you?”

he looks over you, the way your hair twirls in the sea salt air, the sun mingling with your skin, the crinkles that rest by your eyes as you smile up at him—and he’s terribly confused by it all.

“i did,” he replies, a little stupid and a little unsure.

you’re looking at him as though he hadn’t nearly made you drive or walk or ride the bus home—whatever it is you did to get here—soaked in the ocean water.

“then no worries,” you say, a shrug of your shoulders punctuating the sentence. he watches as your eyes flit down from his to his sweatshirt, and then he sees the flicker of recognition lay somewhere in your expression, the way the corners of your lips quirk upwards as you inhale a little gasp of breath. “you go to uci?”

“yeah,” he replies after a little pause, “yeah, or, i will in a week, i guess.”

and then you smile, wider than the first time, your gaze catching his and not daring to leave as you speak.

“i will too,” you say, and then you turn back out to the horizon, the breeze catching your hair and twisting it around your cheeks. “i just moved here, actually.” you send him a quick glance over your shoulder. “i’m guessing you did too?”

iwaizumi laughs, quietly, hardly more than a rush of breath.

“what gave it away?”

“don’t know,” you say, and he watches as your fingers reach up to toy with the sleeve of your own sweatshirt, twisting the fabric over your knuckles. “you seem nervous, i guess.” another glance back at him, a little, barely-there smile resting on your lips, “i get it.”

there’s a bit of silence that settles for just a moment. here, iwaizumi can hear the quiet squawking of faraway seagulls and the much louder sound of water flowing between them, leaving his skin a little cold at the touch.

“hey, what did you say your name was?” he asks after only a moment. he knows you never gave your name, and yet the question still falls past his lips like that.

“don’t believe i said it,” you reply, a little teasing tone on your tongue, a tilt to your head as you turn back to him. “you first.”

“iwaizumi,” he says, because it’s first instinct, because even though the name hajime rests somewhere in the back of his head, or even the nickname iwa, his last name feels correct when he says it—and even more so when you repeat it back to him with a little nod of your head.

and then you say your name, letting the sound mix with the ocean and the seagulls and the sweet breeze running past his ears, letting it settle with the water and the grains of sand that rest beneath him, letting it twirl in the sea salt and fall upon his ears.

and though he doesn’t say it at the time, the thought of oh, that sounds nice, settles into his skull.

—————

it’s a wednesday when he sees you again, sitting under one of the trees on campus to stay in the shade, your laptop propped up on your legs. he sees your gaze catch his, that flicker of recognition sitting on your face for just a moment, and then his name spills past your lips in a single breath.

“iwaizumi!” you call, though it’s hardly something loud, just a slight raise of your voice over the breeze whistling through the leaves. he laughs a bit at your excitement, a sputter of breath over his tongue, a blush at the tips of his ears at the sound of his name. he walks over to where you sit, amusement slipping through his face from the way his lips quirk into a smile and the way his brows raise just a bit.

he watches you mess with your fingers as you go to speak again, twirling your knuckles one around the other, pulling on your thumbs and pressing on the joints.

“sorry,” you say, a shake of your head following your voice, but then you take a breath and speak again, “i was just wondering, are you doing anything right now?”

“no,” he says, “i was just getting some air.”

and then you smile up at him, another question sitting on your tongue—he can tell by the way you’re looking at him, eyes a little wider, maybe a bit brighter, lips parted as your gaze falls over his face.

“okay, so there’s this taco place just off campus that i’ve been dying to try but i really don’t want to go alone.” you pause to look at him, bottom lip caught between your teeth and brows furrowed.

“i’ll go with you,” he says, a shrug of his shoulder following the reply.

and he isn’t entirely sure why—beyond the normal satisfaction of making someone happy—but he finds he likes the way you grin up at him after he agrees, the way your smile digs into your cheeks and the way your eyes crinkle at the edges. if he wasn’t sure, he’d think you’d been waiting for him to turn up just to ask him the question, if he wasn’t much smarter and much more of a realist than that, he’d almost let the thought settle. he doesn’t, of course, because he honestly finds that he likes the coincidence more than he would the alternative.

“great, okay, i just have like, two more pages left of this reading and then we can head over.” he watches you move a bit against the tree, opening up space beside you on the grass. “if you sit down i promise i’ll be done in ten minutes.”

“ten minutes,” he repeats, a smirk settling against his cheeks as he moves down next to you, “i’ll be timing you.”

“well now i’ll beat ten minutes,” you reply, already dividing your attention between your laptop and iwaizumi. he doesn’t dare respond again, because you’re far too busy with the text to even hear him now, and instead leans against the tree, scrolling mindlessly on his phone—though he keeps a close eye on the time, he has to hold you to your promise, doesn’t he?

and so he lets the bit of time pass beneath the shade of the tree, lets the wind pass through the leaves and onto his skin, kissing the exposed flesh of his arms and twirling through his short strands of hair. it feels nice out here, still warm from summer despite the steady approach of fall, the grass green and the sun, though not entirely upon him, shines over the campus and paints it in this pretty kind of light.

and here he sits, beneath a tree on an end-of-summer day, with you next to him, skimming a reading that you were paying much more attention to before he got here and before you made plans.

and when you shove your laptop closed, a full 12 minutes after you’d first started again (because two pages had turned into four, and because the way you creased your brows together as you read gave you a headache, and because the headache made you stop skimming and actually try to read), you put your things away and get up from your spot, offering iwaizumi a hand to pull him up as well.

and then you lead him along, walking through campus and telling him all about the things you’ve found while you’ve been here (which, admittedly, hasn’t been much. not between the pre-class readings and trying to figure out where your classes are, anyway).

and things feel a little better than they had just a few days prior at the beach—though he has to admit, he does miss the sand settling beneath his feet and the smell of sea salt twirling in the air. but things feel better, a little lighter maybe, as he watches you laugh at yourself and smile over at him as you speak.

iwaizumi, tentatively, carefully, feels a little less alone than he had before.

—————

the taco place becomes a frequent stop for iwaizumi—not alone, no, never alone. from the moment you walked with him into the little restaurant, filled with tables only meant for two people and music playing on an old speaker, the voices crackling through the quiet air, from the moment he stood at the register and saw you waiting beside him before adding a little theirs, too, at the end, adding your order onto his receipt, both of you’d known that this might become something of a tradition.

so he’s managed to find himself here again, the first month of classes now behind him, and you sitting across from him at what the two of you have now designated as your taco place.

“you have to let me meet oikawa,” you say, a tortilla chip settled between your fingers, hanging in the air as you wait for his response.

“absolutely not,” he replies, shaking his head and waving you off with a hand.

“makki and mattsun, then,” you say, and laughter leaves him in a rush of breath as he rolls his eyes.

“that’s even worse.”

“i guess we’re facetiming oikawa tonight, then,” you say, looking at him with a smile on your face that he knows means you’ve won, so he pulls out his phone, sighing as he scrolls through the contacts.

“he’s been begging me to call him all day, so you can call him now.” he offers the phone out to you, and then raises it up quickly as you go to grab it. “not facetime,” he says as he lays his phone in your hand.

he watches as you happily click the call button, your bottom lip pulled between your teeth to bite back the smile that encroaches onto your cheeks. he hears it ring for a few moments before oikawa’s muffled voice rattles through the speakers.

“oh thank god, iwa, i’ve been waiting-” is all iwaizumi catches before you gasp, turning to him with your mouth hanging open.

“he calls you iwa?” you ask, the question spilling past excited breath. he feels the familiar feeling of blush creeping up his ears, and he bites on his tongue as he considers his response. of course, the response never leaves him, because it’s only a few seconds before he hears oikawa’s panicked voice on the other end.

he can’t make out everything he says, not between the static, how fast he’s talking, and the fact that the phone is pressed to your ear, but he does catch the word dating, and he’s quick to lean forward to try to grab the phone from your hands.

but of course, you’re just a little faster, turning away so that his phone is just out of his reach.

“no, no, we’re not dating, oikawa,” you say, and then there’s more of oikawa’s voice on the other end of the line, still a little too fast for him to catch, “yes, that’s me,” you reply through your laughter. iwaizumi hears oikawa begin to settle through the phone speakers, and then he speaks again.

“wait,” oikawa says, a little clearer now that he’s not talking as fast as he can, “he told you about me?”

you lean forward just a bit, and it’s then that iwaizumi can grab hold of his phone again, placing it against his ear with a sigh.

“yes, dumbass, of course i talk about you. i need someone to make fun of while i’m here,” he says, watching the way you stifle laughter and holding back his own as he hears oikawa’s little sigh on the other end.

“how nice of you to finally call me, iwa.”

“oh shut it, i’ll call you again later tonight,” he replies, and he hears the half-hearted protests come from the other end before he ends the call, leaning over the table with his head in one of his hands.

“he seems fun,” you say after a beat of silence, your voice light and teasing. he looks up to see you leaning forward, tilting your head at him, your eyes crinkling at the corners. “i think i like him.”

“please don’t tell him that,” he says with a groan, shaking his head before grabbing a tortilla chip from the basket that sits between you. “i can’t deal with his ego getting bigger.”

you laugh then, and if he’s honest, it’s a sound he’s been missing lately. classes have been so busy, he hadn’t gotten a chance to see you yet this week besides quiet study sessions. today’s the most you’ve laughed in a while, the most he’s seen you smile and roll your eyes and shake your head at him because, if he’s not the one being stupid, someone he knows certainly is.

there’s another bit of silence as your eyes flick over him, your brows furrowing and you suck one of your cheeks into your mouth as you think. your hair falls over and into your eyes, catching the bit of sunlight that leaks in through the window beside you—it’s beginning to set, he realizes when he notices just how orange the rays are.

“iwa, huh?” you say. the tips of his ears heat up at the name.

“yeah, since we were kids.”

“i like it,” you say, punctuating the sentence by plucking another chip from the basket, “i think it makes you seem a little softer, you know?”

“because iwaizumi’s so gruff,” he replies, amusement pricking at his tone, his arms now crossed in front of his chest as he listens to you.

“only when he wants to be,” you tease, lowering your voice and laughing when he narrows his eyes at you.

“iwa it is, then,” he says. you smile up at him, fully now, the sunset mixing with the glow of your cheeks.

“iwa it is.”

he’d never tell oikawa, but he’d agree with you here. iwa’s always felt softer, a little more refined, maybe, but with your voice coating the syllables, with your voice settling in the air and creeping into his ears, with your voice saying his stupid little childhood nickname, he’s certain he feels a little softer, too.

—————

the gymnasium lights feel a little too bright now that the game’s over, now that his team has pulled everyone into a celebration, the sound of cheers filling the stands and slicing the air by his ears. his throat feels scratchy from yelling, his voice already a little gravelly when he congratulates one of his teammates with a hand on the back.

and then he’s letting his eyes wander the bleachers, searching for his black jersey that you’d insisted on wearing tonight because, for his first game, you swore you would show some team spirit.

but he doesn’t manage to find you there, because you’re already on the gymnasium floor when his gaze meets yours, your hands held close to your face and your lips parted in an easy smile.

“iwa!” you call—never quite a yell, just enough to reach above the rest of the noise that echoes against the floors and the walls. he walks towards you, ignoring the sounds of muffled confusion that arise from his team behind him at the name. “you did so well,” you say as he reaches you, your hands flying up to rest on his upper arms. “i’m proud of you.”

the nickname is still new on your tongue when you say it, still sounds a little foreign when it passes your lips, but he likes the way it sounds—likes the way it carries with your voice and the way your tone always lilts with the sweet syllables.

and you’re so close to him now, hands steady on his arms, looking at him with a smile that presses into your cheeks with how wide it is, and there’s not a single complaint in your expression—even though he’s sweaty, still a little out of breath despite already meeting with the coaches and the team, even though he’s sure he needs a shower and he’s still riding the high from that final play.

his appreciation follows the breaths that pass his lips, whispers of thank you crossing his tongue before they sit in the air that rests between you.

“oh come on,” you say, raising a hand from his arm to push his head to the side, letting it loll over his shoulder for a moment as laughter bubbles out of his throat, “you could stand to be a little more excited. i mean, that save was insane!”

“it was nothing,” he replies, voice scratching at the muscles of his neck, a blush biting at the tips of his ears. he hopes it blends with the redness of exhaustion.

“oh my god, iwa, please shut up,” you groan, swatting at his chest with a roll of your eyes.

he goes to respond, to say something snarky in reply to you, but he’s interrupted by a passing hand on his back, and then another, his team walking past him and saying their goodbyes.

“see you at practice monday, iwa,” one of them teases, the nickname spilling past his lips with the bite of tempting laughter, and then there’s a few more echoes of the name throughout the group.

“oh shut it, dumbasses” iwa replies, leaning forward to swat at a few of them as they pass, just barely grazing their arms as they move out of his reach. he hears you laughing at him, the words good job passing over your stuttered breath to his teammates, and iwa, half-heartedly, and terribly, wishes those words were only for him—that his stupid teammates couldn’t hear the stutter of your breath that bubbled past your lips because of him.

and there, as readily as he feels the heat at the tips of his ears, as clear as his heartbeat against his ribcage, as apparent as the faltering breath in his lungs, iwa comes to know that maybe friends don’t think this way. that maybe, friends don’t look at the beach and know the stretch of sand where you met, that they don’t yearn for your laughter or your smile, that they don’t wait for your texts with shaking hands, a wish that you’ll meet him soon.

iwa, who has never known anything more than second place, realizes in a breathless moment that he wishes to be first.

“hey,” you say, pulling his attention back to you and the way the now fading gymnasium lights lay on your skin, the way your smile pulls on your lips and the way your hair twirls around your face, “if we run i bet we can still get tacos tonight.” your voice drags out the proposition, and you lean into him as you speak, as though you could drag him purely by the sound of your voice.

terribly, iwa believes you could.

“then you better start running.”

—————-

it’s honestly getting too cold to be out on the beach like this. october’s begun to settle into the california air, and though it’s not nearly as cold as it gets in japan, the nearly-midnight chill is enough for iwa to pull the coat he grabbed earlier tighter around himself.

and still, despite the cold, he can only watch as you walk into the water, letting the ocean lap at your ankles and attempt to pull you in deeper. you have a coat of your own that you’ve refused to zip, so instead you shrug your shoulders together as you stuff your hands deep into the pockets. your shoes and your socks are abandoned in the dry sand behind you, though he keeps a careful eye on them, and there you stand in the water, letting the breeze twirl in your hair and kiss across your cheeks and your nose until they’re both too cold for you to feel.

“iwa,” you say, turning back to glance at him, the moonlight sitting on your face and floating in your lashes, casting little shadows all across your cheekbones, “do you ever miss home?”

he laughs, though there’s hardly humor to it. his breath leaves him in a rush as he moves to stand a little closer to you, not daring to let his feet dip into the chilling water.

“yeah,” he begins, “constantly.” he reaches out a hand and watches as his fingertips brush against the material of your coat, trailing up your back as silence settles between you. his touch is light enough that you can’t feel it, and he can only just barely feel the fabric against his skin.

“what do you miss most?” you ask, and he pulls his hand away just in time for you to turn to him fully now, both of you standing, one in the water, the other on land, hands deep into the pockets of your coats.

“friends, my family,” iwa starts, but you shake your head and pull your hands out of your pockets to grab him by the arms, just above his wrists.

“no, iwa, more specific.”

he stares at you for a moment, the reflection of the moon over the water sitting behind you, the sound of the waves washing against the shore filling the moment. the breeze whistles between you, and he’s sure both his nose and his ears are red from the chill, but he feels the way your thumb brushes and rubs into his sleeve, and suddenly he can only focus on a response to you.

“there was this bakery my mom and i used to go to. we would get bread and then a few sweets for my little sister,” he pauses, taking a moment to watch the way you tilt your head at him, the way the corners of your lips begin to turn upwards, “honestly, i miss the bread. oikawa would always steal some if he came over.”

“that sounds nice,” you reply with a little breath, your voice just barely carrying over the breeze.

“it was,” he says. “what do you miss?”

“my mom’s laugh,” you reply, as though the answer had been sitting on your tongue, “it doesn’t sound the same over the phone.”

“i get it.” you step out of the water to move closer to him, and it’s then that iwa can see the goosebumps that raise across your skin. he takes your hands off of his wrists and puts them back into your pockets, leaning forward to pull the hood of your coat over your ears. “i miss hearing her say my name.” his hands stay on the hem of your hood for a moment, watching the way your eyes flit over his face and the way your lips part with his movement.

“iwaizumi?” you ask.

“no,” he replies, “hajime. she calls me hajime.”

“i’ve always thought your first name was pretty,” you begin, and then repeat the name back to him, letting it float between you, your faces close enough that he can feel his name in your breath when it brushes his cheeks. “i think it suits you.”

if he could feel his ears, he’s sure they’d be warm with something like adoration. that, at the sound of your voice curling around his name, his first name, there would be a blush coating his cheeks all the way down to his neck if he wasn’t already red from the cold air of midnight.

“then call me that,” he says—thoughtless, a little too quick for his liking. “hajime, i mean. if you’d like.”

and then you smile, your eyes dark from the night but still managing to catch the bit of light that still settles on the beach, and you nod, your bottom lip caught between your teeth.

“okay, hajime,” you say, “whatever you’d like.”

and maybe if he’d been a little more brave, maybe if he’d known how to be first, if he’d known what it was like to know someone like this, he would’ve kissed you then.

he doesn’t. part of him wishes he did.

—————

hajime’s been in his apartment for too long now. he’s known his laptop more than any other person this week, known the way the keys feel against the pads of his fingertips more than he’s known the sound of anyone’s voice besides his own.

so when there’s a knock at his door, a quiet little thing that floats through the walls of his apartment and into his space on the couch, there’s part of him that’s hoping it’s you—and an even better part that knows it has to be. so he rises from where he sits and opens the door, only to find the person he wished for most standing behind it, giant plastic bags in your hands.

“okay, i know you said you couldn’t make it to dinner tonight but i haven’t seen you in like, forever, so i brought you tacos,” you say, all in one breath, as though you can’t keep anything safe behind your lips, so you might as well say it all now.

“you brought me tacos?” he asks, disbelief scorching his tongue.

“hajime,” you begin, your brows furrowing as you look at him, “of course i did. i like having you around.”

he stands there for a moment, a little unsure of what to do now, but he watches you in the doorway until you tilt your head and your face breaks into a smile as you gesture inside, silently asking to come in. he mumbles something that means yes, and then steps aside, grabbing one of the bags from you and setting it onto the counter.

he won’t say it aloud, not now, at least, but he’s missed you. it’s stupid, because it’s only been a week or so, but with all the papers he’s been writing and midterms never really being over, he feels like it’s been forever since he last got to see you—as though he hasn’t heard you laugh in months.

so as he sets up your tacos and the chips and the rest of the food you got him onto his little table, it feels a bit like coming home.

“well, hajime,” you begin, drawing out his name, still letting his first name get used to your tongue and your tone, “i’d say you were due for a break anyway.”

“maybe,” he replies, not daring to admit that you were ever right. “i’m just using you for the tacos, if i’m honest.”

“is that why this is the first time i’ve ever paid at that place?”

hajime laughs, choking on the bit of his taco he’d just taken a bite of, and shakes his head at you, narrowing his eyes at the way you smirk and the way your brows raise a little too pridefully.

“if i wasn’t so lonely, i’d kick you out right now,” he replies, though any threat is lost somewhere in his throat, because it comes out much more endearing than he’d ever planned.

“aw, did you miss me?” you tease. he rolls his eyes at you.

“hardly.”

he won’t say it, not now, especially not when you’re biting back the smile that presses into your cheeks, not when you’re sitting in front of him, crinkles at the corners of your eyes, your laughter biting at every word you speak.

he’ll tell you he missed you another time, maybe. but now just doesn’t seem quite right.

—————

he’s leaving tomorrow.

he knows he’ll be back after just a few weeks. that, once winter has started to move its way out of japan, he’ll be going with it, traveling back to california on a much too long flight just to get back here again.

but for now, he’s leaving, and neither of you really want to talk about it.

you’d offered to help him pack, and though it was hardly a grueling task, he still allowed you to, still said yes when you asked to come over without any hesitation, because he can’t imagine spending his last day here with anyone else. and now you’re sorting through his shirts, holding some of them up for him, the question leave or take? passing your lips with every piece you hold up.

you’re holding up one of his sweatshirts now, his favorite one, the one he’d wore on cold summer nights with oikawa, makki, and mattsun screaming in his ears, the one he wore when you spent late nights at the beach with him, the one he threw on whenever it was cold after practice.

“leave,” he says. you furrow your brows, turning the sweatshirt and leaning over to make sure it’s the one you think it is, and then look back at him, confusion written all over your expression.

“you love this one though,” you reply. he shrugs, folding more clothes into his suitcase while you keep staring at him, and then you throw it into the take pile.

“hey, no, i said leave.” he picks up the sweatshirt and throws it back at you, but you’re already placing it into the pile again.

“hajime, you’ll miss it if you don’t take it,” you reply, a little scolding tone sitting on your tongue.

“i said no,” he says, a little more stern than he expects it to be, and he pauses for a breath when your eyes widen at him, and for a moment, he regrets ever fighting you on this. but then he gathers himself, and he speaks again. “i want you to have it while i’m gone,” he starts, every word punctuated with his heart rattling against his ribs, “you’d keep it safer than i would.”

the explanation is a lie, a terrible one, because he’s had that sweatshirt for years now, because there’s not a single thread out of place on it because he’s made sure it looks nice, because every stain that ever worked its way into the fabric was cleaned out within seconds—and because you know all of this.

but then you grab the sweatshirt back and you hug it to your chest, your fingers tracing over the design and twisting the strings over your knuckles.

“okay.” the word comes out as a breath, just barely loud enough to reach his ears. “let me go put it in my bag.”

and hajime isn’t sure why, but he gets up and follows you to the doorway where your bag sits, and you laugh at him, mumbling something about him not letting you out of his sight, and he doesn’t even have the energy to deny it, not when it feels like every step you take away from him feels like another second lost with you.

so he watches you fold the sweatshirt and put it in your little bag, and he leans against the wall as you stand back up, not daring to take his eyes off of you. you lean back against the opposite wall, your eyes flicking over him, and god you look as tired as he feels, your eyes a little dimmer than usual, your lips turned downwards—you haven’t even said goodbye yet.

and maybe now isn’t the best time, maybe the day before he leaves—a friday afternoon where both of you have just barely finished your finals, his closet half-torn apart, isn’t the time, but he doesn’t care, because if he doesn’t try now, he isn’t sure if he ever will.

it takes two strides for him to reach you, and then one of his hands finds your cheek and the other wraps around your waist, backing you into the wall as his lips catch yours.

you mumble his name into his lips, the word hajime passing between you as you kiss him back, your hands finding their way onto his cheeks. he can feel the way your thumbs press against his cheekbones, the way they brush against his lashes as he kisses you, and now he’s only wondering why he never did this sooner.

because god, kissing you feels idyllic, like every stupid story oikawa ever told him about his fucking dates has crumbled away in front of him because none of them could have felt like this—none of them could feel like the way your whispered laughter felt late at night in the library, when the two of you were meant to be studying but couldn’t be bothered to focus. they couldn’t feel like your hands on his wrists as you pulled him further into the ocean when it was still warm. they couldn’t feel like—

well, they couldn’t feel like a heartbroken goodbye.

when he pulls away, he’s a bit breathless, leaning his forehead against your temple, his fingers falling over your cheeks because he’s never been allowed to know this before, and god he wants to.

“leave or take?” you ask, a scratch to your voice, a little crackling in your tone.

and in the worst realization yet, he remembers that he’s leaving tomorrow, and that he won’t be back for a month.

“take,” he whispers into you, burying his head into the juncture of your neck and shoulder. “i wish i could take you.”

—————

it’s late for him, nearly midnight now, the moonlight is filtering in through his blinds and over his bed, and his finger is hovering over the call button. he knows it’s still pretty early for you, that maybe you won’t even be awake anyway, but you’d told him to call you, that you’d never be mad at him for trying, and even though you’ve talked all throughout winter break, he’s still nervous every time he tries.

but he presses the call button, and he lets it ring.

it’s only a few moments later when the ring stops, and then your voice comes through the line, a little muffled, a little static coating your tone, but it’s still you, so he’ll take it.

he has to admit though, you were right. it’s not the same over the phone.

“hajime,” you breathe, relief in your voice, and he laughs, echoing your name back to you. “it’s good to hear your voice.”

“it’s good to hear yours,” he replies. you laugh, and he can picture the way you’d bow your head, rolling your eyes at him to brush him off.

“did you go to the bakery today?” you ask, and he sighs, rolling over onto his back.

“yes,” he breathes, “and we got my sister a few pastries, just like i promised you we would.”

“well, i have to make sure you’re being nice to her,” you tease, and he groans. if you were there, he would’ve knocked his shoulder into yours and then you would’ve shoved him away, undoubtedly into the sand or the water.

“she’s almost thirteen, she can handle not being spoiled,” he replies.

“oh shush, she deserves it for putting up with you.”

you both fall into laughter after that, yours a little too technology-ridden for his liking, a little too mechanical and a few too many cracks over the line. he’s sure he sounds the same to you, like he’s half-there and half-not, like you can’t really be sure if he exists or if he’s just technology.

but he knows your skin, and your lips, and your laughter when you’re there with him, and for that he knows you’re real.

“so, how many days do we have left now?” he asks after silence settles between you. he’s keeping count too, but he’d rather hear the number in your voice.

“six,” you reply. “just six.”

another bit of silence passes over you, and for a while, he’s just listening to the way you breathe on the other end of the line. you sound tired, like you’ve stayed up late and you’ve hardly gotten enough sleep, and he swears he can hear your breathing settling into rest, but then you speak again.

“haji,” you say, cutting yourself off before you can say more.

“haji?” he asks, a bit of amusement cutting at the word. he thinks he likes it—it’s all your own.

“yeah,” you start, “haji.” he hears you take a breath, listens to the way you breathe as though he could place himself there, as though merely the sound of your lungs could allow him to see you. “i miss you,” you say.

and he remembers before, back during midterms, when the words hadn’t felt quite right on his tongue, when he’d been too prideful, when he wasn’t sure it was the right time, and he realizes that he’s glad he saved them.

because now, when he’s halfway across the world, feels a lot more correct than when you’d only been a few steps away.

“i miss you too,” he replies.

“good,” you say, and he can hear the smile that leaks into your voice, “i think there’s a beach waiting for us back in california.”

—————

haji fell in love with california beaches about six months ago, when it’d been warmer and he’d been able to walk the line between land and sea without a chill running down his spine. and now, haji sits with the sand beneath him, cool to the touch from the february chill, but he’s wearing a coat, so it hardly matters.

it’s his first day back here, his first day back at the ocean, and though he misses his family and his friends back home, he feels a hand on his shoulder, and he finds that missing things takes up too much time—especially when there are good things right in front of you.

so he turns, and there you are, leaning down to press your palm into his shoulder, your bag slung over yours as you look down at him.

he doesn’t have to be the one to pull you into him, because by the time he’s seen you, you’re already falling into him, wrapping your arms around his neck and kneeling beside him. he’d expected things to be worse, that maybe you’d take everything back, or that neither of you would quite know how to act around the other, but when he feels your fingers tangle with the short hair at the back of his neck, he realizes he doesn’t need to know much around you. things just tend to happen with you.

“it’s freezing out here,” you mumble, your voice muffled by his shoulder, and he laughs, wrapping his arms tighter around you.

“it was your idea to meet at the beach,” he replies. and you groan, your voice reverberating into his skin.

“you should know not to listen to me.”

“i think you’ve told me the opposite before,” he says, and you stifle laughter in his coat.

“then you should know when to tell me no,” you reply, and now he laughs, pulling away from you to unzip his coat so he can wrap it around the both of you—at least as much as he can, but with you situated between his legs, he can get most of it.

“i think i tried to.” you let out one final groan before resting your forehead against his shoulder, and he laughs again, letting one side of the coat go so he can bring a hand up to the back of your head, letting his thumb trace into you there.

“haji,” you start, but pause when you feel the stutter of his breath. you raise your head from his shoulder, looking up at him with that smirk that he’s missed so much, your eyes bright with something that he could never find back home. “haji,” you repeat.

he doesn’t reply for a moment, just lets his eyes flit over your face. though the sunlight isn’t as warm as he’d wish for, it still manages to twirl in your hair and leave a soft glow on your skin.

“that sounds nice,” he says finally, and he lets go of his coat to brush some hair out of your face, and then his hands still on your cheeks. here, he can feel the way your smile presses into his palms, can feel the brush of your lashes against his thumbs.

“you think so?” you tease, and he rolls his eyes at you. if his hands weren’t already occupied with your cheeks, he’d swat at you, or maybe he’d knock his shoulder into yours, but for now, he accepts the eye roll and the way he narrows them at you afterwards. you laugh at him, your head bowing forward, nearly close enough for your forehead to touch his. “i like it too, if that makes you feel any better. it’s pretty.”

“now, i never said i liked it,” he replies, and because you have a free hand, you swat him in the chest and he laughs now, unable to stop the way it spreads across his cheeks. “i guess i’ll let you call me it though, since it makes you happy.”

what he doesn’t say, and what he doubts he’ll ever say, is that haji is entirely yours. he’s iwaizumi to everyone, iwa to oikawa, and hajime to his family, but he’s never been haji before—so this, this part of him, is something that exists and lives only for you, and he’s so glad to give it to you.

this part of him, though still new, was forged here in california, in the end-of-summer waters that lapped at his feet, in the taco place that he knows by heart, in the sound of your voice echoing in his ears and his name being best known in the way you say the syllables.

“haji,” you breathe, “you’re impossible.” but he knows you don’t mean it, because you’re mumbling that against his lips and he can feel the pull of your smile against his own.

and though haji knows he fell in love with the beach six months ago, what he realizes now, when you’re kissing him and your fingertips are against his skin and he can feel the warmth of you more than he can feel that of the sun, is that he may fall in love at the beach, too. he isn’t there yet, but he’s well on his way.

#wow #so amazing #so good #heartwarming #AHHH

[kreidewaltz]

any good romance anime to watch 🙏🏻 i just finished fruba and im damaged /hj

[kreidewaltz]

wow i actually watched banana fish sometimes i cant believe it </3

#pain #pain is all i feel watching that #ALSO GIVEN OVA ON DEC!!!!

[kreidewaltz]

GUYS this how my yoimiya summons went

#i didnt do any rituals i was too excited #20 wishes in i got mona 😐 78 pity yeah #THEN I GOT YOIMIYA IN 74TH PITY YES #and i got a c4 diona c1 xinyan and sayu 🤧 #dont lose hope

[kreidewaltz]

just finished studying 2 subjects and school just officially started (and i wrote notes) i feel good 🤧

[kreidewaltz]

oh to be called "my love" by your favourite person in the whole world

#CHILDE MR TARTAGLIA AJAX the 11th fatui harbinger #when 😐😐 #i love him very much 🗣️🗣️🗣️