lady-magick

[lady-magick]

#*

[lady-magick]

Mikky Ekko - Pull Me Down

#**

[lady-magick]

TAGGING → Dianna Agron, Naya Rivera.

LOCATION → Naya’s residence.

TIME FRAME → February 12th, 2013. Late evening.

NOTES → yg. vg.

NAYA RIVERA:

Due to how closely pressed together they were, even as Naya backed Dianna up towards the stairs, she could feel the blonde’s heart hammering against her chest, just like her own was. It was like they were beating together in that moment, both going crazy with the same fear, the same excitement, the same anticipation of whatever was to come. Naya liked it, strangely. She liked being this connected and close to Dianna again, where she could feel like they were just one being, which it’d been so long since she’d felt like. It was nice and it was needed, but it was kind of hard to focus on when Naya had just done something as bold as lead the other girl towards the stairs, where it was pretty obvious what was to come as a result.

Sure, they could’ve just cuddled when they got up the stairs and to the bedroom, but judging by what they’d just been doing, and how in the moment they still were, Naya was pretty sure that wasn’t what was going to happen. And she was pretty sure Dianna knew that, too. So, by the time they’d gotten to the bottom of the stairs, Naya’s heart was pretty much beating out of her chest. She’d left the next move in Dianna’s hands, which was kind of scary. It was obvious what Naya wanted to do, but what if Dianna didn’t? What if she freaked out and ran? And then Naya would just look creepy and weird, and the fact that that was a definite possibility scared her a lot. So, needless to say, she was definitely shocked when Dianna pulled away and took her hands, carefully backing up the stairs, but she was also silently very relieved.

Keeping tightly hold of Dianna’s hands, not wanting to let her go at all, Naya followed her up the stairs, her eyes never leaving Dianna’s the entire time. If her mind hadn’t been completely clouded by her feelings for the girl in front of her, she’d have wondered how the heck she was managing to walk so easily up the stairs without looking where she was going. She was grateful she was, though. It meant that Naya never had to remove her gaze from where it’d been locked with Dianna’s, and by the time they reached the top of the stairs, and Dianna had said what she wanted to say, Naya was free to step forward and press her lips against the other girl’s again, showing her in that one kiss just how grateful she was that Dianna had returned her opposite of hate.

Not wanting to, but knowing she had to if she wanted them to go any further, Naya pulled back from the kiss, but kept hold of one of Dianna’s hands tightly. She let go of the other, turning to walk hand in hand with the blonde towards her bedroom. As they reached the door, Naya pushed it open, then twisted her body to face Dianna’s, her free hand reaching out to press gently to the girl’s back and pull her body close once more, pressing them both together again. Letting go of the hand Naya was still holding, she slowly lifted her hand to Dianna’s face, delicately brushing a piece of blonde hair out of her eyes, before resting her hand against her cheek. “Stop me if I’m overstepping,” she whispered, not wanting to push Dianna further than she wanted to go.

She didn’t give the girl much chance to answer before her hand was sliding from her cheek to the back of her neck, and Naya was leaning in to initiate yet another kiss. This time, it was a far firmer, more passionate kiss, and Naya didn’t hesitate to slowly start to back into her room, bringing Dianna - their bodies still pressed together - in with her, and pulling the door closed behind them. Obviously, Dianna was free to stop Naya at any point, but until she actually did, Naya wasn’t going to stop. She wanted all of Dianna, and she wanted to show her just how badly she’d missed her and how badly she really did want her, providing Dianna wanted that, too.

DIANNA AGRON:

A week ago, Dianna had been dating Santana, and the thought of being with Naya was something that seemed... impossible. Truth be told, the thought of being with Naya in this way had never left her mind, impossible as it seemed at the time. She remained faithful to Santana, of course, but she would have been lying if she claimed Naya had become irrelevant. Technically, Dianna was still dating Santana. So this was the epitome of wrong. But now, despite the fact that Dianna had figured this would never happen and she was still with Santana, it felt so right. The closeness between she and Naya electrified hre senses. Every nerve ending in her body was on fire, and Naya couldn't be close enough for her longing for her to be sated.

The fact Dianna and Naya both made it up the stairs unscathed shocked the blonde. But she didn't have time to analyze their luck before Naya's lips were pressed against her own. Unlike the first few times they had kissed, it was entirely true. They both wanted it, along with everything else that the other could offer. And judging by the way Naya's soft, full lips were moving against her own, Dianna knew that there was more there than she had the ability to comprehend at the very moment. Not that she was complaining, though. With Santana, her thoughts were almost empty. Everything was easy, even though it wasn't easy at all. She didn't have to fight for her, and she knew what each day was going to hold, and what each touch would feel like.

With Naya, though, nothing was ever really easy. Except their friendship. That was the easiest thing in the world. But when it came to them romantically, it was all fire. Every time they kissed, it was - pardon the cliche - fireworks. Sparks lit up the air around them, and Dianna became drunk on Naya's kiss. That was extremely true even now, with not only their lips interlocked, but also their bodies. The way Dianna felt with Naya pressed against her was nothing short of amazing. It was as if they were two puzzle pieces made to fit together. As intense as that sounded.

Having fallen into a trance like state, it wasn't until Naya pulled away and spoke that the blonde even registered how close to her bedroom they were. As if there weren't enough butterflies in her belly, even more promptly attacked. Her heart leaped at Naya's statement, it suddenly becoming scarily clear where this was going, leaving no shadow of a doubt, now. "You won't," she quickly reassured, before any further conversation was cut off. Dianna's lips danced equally as passionately against the other girl's. She moved in sync with Naya, feeling them enter her bedroom and the door close behind them.

Okay, so this was really happening. Naya's hand rested on her back, urging them even closer, gently, while her other laid softly on her cheek as they kissed. Naya didn't seem hesitant, but both of their lips moved with tenderness, most likely fearing the same thing - losing the other. So, Dianna began to encourage her even further. She needed to prove that what Naya was feeling currently was totally mutual. Small, gentle hands wound around a slim waist, and Dianna parted her lips, her tongue sneaking out to brush cautiously over Naya's. It occurred to her, then, that they were still hovering near the door, and the bed was still much too far away. But the seven or so steps between the pair and the bed seemed more like miles than steps.

So, they would take it slow. That was a good solution. There was no rush, at this point. This moment had been building since the day they met, and there was no doubt in Dianna's mind that they had worked for this. All the tears, the anger, heartbreak, betrayal, and so on. They hadn't pushed things thus far, and Dianna, personally, wasn't about to start now. As far as she was concerned, she had forever to show Naya how much she cared for her - opposite of hated her - and how utterly worth all the strife this was. There was forever for them, Dianna knew, and even if there wasn't, there was now. Tonight. Them, and the four walls around them and nothing else in the world. And at the end of the day, that was all that mattered.

So, Dianna took the first step, gently leading Naya towards the bed, and whatever the future held for them.

NEVER LET YOU FALL → RIVERGRON.

#t: never let you fall #nr

[lady-magick]

Endless pictures of Dianna Agron 46/?

#*

[lady-magick]

TAGGING → Dianna Agron, Naya Rivera.

LOCATION → Naya’s residence.

TIME FRAME → February 12th, 2013. Late evening.

NOTES → yg. vg.

NAYA RIVERA:

Obviously, Dianna had come over to try to fix things, not to be yelled at for things that couldn’t be changed now. Sure, the outcome could change, but what was done was done already, and there was no taking it back now. So, Naya yelling at Dianna about all of the things she’d done wrong was kind of pointless. There’d be no way for the blonde to take back what’d happened, just like there’d been no way for Naya to take back those emails, no matter how hard she’d tried - or how much research she’d done to try to figure out how to unsend an email. And, although she’d needed to vent and say what she’d said, the moment Naya had said it, she’d regretted it. She’d wanted to take it back, because yelling at Dianna made her feel terrible, and she didn’t want to cause a fight.

Apparently, though, they weren’t going to fight. Dianna wasn’t going to yell back. She was just going to take whatever Naya threw at her, and Naya wasn’t sure how she felt about that. It made her ranting feel a little bit pointless, but she knew she’d said what she’d wanted to and needed to say, so it was okay really. Everything was out there now, and they could move onto whatever was going to come next. And, what did come next was greatly needed. Although every kiss Naya and Dianna shared was perfect in Naya’s opinion, Naya always tried to stop them from meaning too much. She didn’t want Dianna to read her feelings, because she’d been denying them. This time, though, she didn’t hold anything back. She kissed Dianna exactly the way she’d wanted to each time previously, and didn’t regret a thing about it. Except maybe pulling away.

Well, no, she didn’t particularly regret that, because it’d allowed Naya a chance to speak and say what was on her mind, even if she had tried to take it back at first. She was glad she corrected herself in the end, though, because she was done with secrets and lies now. She wanted Dianna to know every feeling, and she wanted to let her in completely. Even when Dianna didn’t say she opposite of hated Naya back, Naya didn’t regret saying it. She wanted to be open and honest, and that was her being exactly that. Besides, she’d called Dianna out on feeling the same way, and although the blonde hadn’t agreed, she also hadn’t protested, so Naya took that as a good sign. Well, that, and the fact that Dianna then promised to never leave her again, and backed it up with a few tears of her own. She hated being the reason Dianna was crying, but she figured it was needed in this instance, so Naya didn’t do anything to try to stop it. She simply sat there, her hand cupping the blonde’s cheek and her forehead pressing gently against hers.

When Dianna finally pulled away from their somewhat awkward position, Naya’s eyes immediately followed, watching Dianna to make sure she didn’t run. Naya wasn’t going to let her run. She’d done far more than enough of that herself, and she didn’t want either of them doing it anymore. Thankfully, though, she wasn’t going to have to stop Dianna, considering the blonde then pulled her up from the chair, pulling her close, before connecting their lips again. This kiss was somehow easier than the last, and Naya didn’t hesitate to return it just as passionately and fearlessly as it was being given. With their bodies pressed tightly together, Naya reached her arms up, wrapping them around Dianna’s neck and tightening them immediately, making sure to keep the other girl as close to her as possible, the whole while keeping their lips connected and basically dancing against each other’s.

Really, really not wanting to pull away this time, it took a lot of strength for Naya to eventually prize her lips away from Dianna’s, although she kept their bodies just as closely pressed together, her arms still wrapped around the other girl’s neck. Breathlessly, she stared at the blonde without saying a word, her eyes just scanning her face. Dianna was perfect, just as perfect as Naya remembered her being before they’d lost all contact and Naya hadn’t had a chance to be so close to that perfect, beautiful face. This was definitely a change for them, considering Naya had pretty much run every time she and Dianna had partaken in a kiss. This time, she wasn’t running, and neither was Dianna, Naya was just staring, and not freaking out or trying to speak to justify what’d just happened.

Instead, she just leaned in again, gently pressing her lips back to Dianna’s, and beginning to walk the blonde backwards towards the door they’d entered only a few moments ago. It was the door leading to the hallway, where they could either exit out of the house, or they could go upstairs to where the bedrooms were, and although Naya hadn’t really processed where she was about to lead them in her mind, she was completely certain she wasn’t about to leave out the front door, or send Dianna out there, either. Pulling back again, she let her eyes scan the blonde’s face as she continued to guide them through the door, turning them to the stairs. It must’ve been obvious to Dianna where Naya was taking them by now, and she figured that if she’d had a problem with it, she’d have voiced that now before Naya took them any further. And if not, Naya would’ve been able to see the doubt in her eyes.

So far, she couldn’t.

DIANNA AGRON:

The fact that Naya had told Dianna that she the opposite of hated her didn't go unnoticed. Not by a long shot. And though Dianna wanted nothing more than to say it back, the paralyzing fear that the slightest thing could push Naya away again and back into her fearful state kept Dianna from voicing it. At least, at that specific moment. But that didn't make it any less true. There was nothing more true in the entire world than the way that Dianna felt for Naya, and she definitely did the opposite of hate her. She hoped that Naya either didn't notice, or wasn't worried about the fact that she hadn't said it back, but even if she did react suddenly, Dianna would be all too willing to soothe her fears. There was no doubt in her mind that it was true, it was just a precaution that - although maybe unnecessary - Dianna felt she needed to take. At least, right now.

But as their kisses continued, now more relaxed, as if both of them were attempting to make up for lost time and the fear that had kept them apart, words became the last thing on Dianna's mind. When shew as kissing Naya, it was like a contradiction. All that filled her mind were words. Thoughts of Naya, thoughts of them, their relationship, what they could be. But at the same time, she was left utterly thoughtless. Unable to think or process anything beyond Naya's lips and the tingling sensation that was left in their wake. Also, Naya's body pressed tightly against her own. Dianna had worried that perhaps they were a little too close, but if Naya had a problem with it, she certainly hadn't voiced it yet.

In fact, she did the exact opposite. As she finally pulled away - only her lips. The rest of her was still firmly pressing into Dianna. - the look that the girl gave the blonde made her knees go weak. It was a look of understanding, nervousness, maybe even a little fear. And Dianna was confident that she was returning the look, because she knew she was feeling the same things that Naya was feeling. She knew that she wouldn't run. Not only had she promised not to, but now that she had managed to get her Naya back - and she knew that it was her Naya again. She could feel it - she wasn't about to let go. But if Naya ran? That'd be worse than anything else that had transpired between them. But clearly, she wasn't running. No, she was just standing there, looking at Dianna the way that she had always dreamed she would. And she couldn't have been happier.

Lost in her sea of happiness and the sensation of Naya's lips against her own once again, it took Dianna a few seconds to realize that Naya was moving them. Momentarily, her heart sped up, because they were moving in the direction of the entry way to the living room. This left them two options. Leaving, or staying. All Dianna could do was pray that it was the latter. The absolute last thing she wanted to do now was leave. Thoughts swarmed her mind, and she prepared herself to fight again, if need be. But just as Dianna was about to go into panic mode, Naya's lips left hers, and she found herself being steered towards the steps. Her heart raced again, for an entirely different reason this time. Even if she wasn't sure where this was going.

Where was it going? Maybe they were just going to cuddle in bed. She'd be fine with that. Welcome it with open arms and heart, even. That had been one of the things that she had missed most about Naya, other than just Naya in general. The cuddling, the closeness, the intimacy - even if at the time it hadn't been true intimacy. At least, that they had been willing to admit. But it didn't feel that way. There was a heaviness, not only in the air, but in Dianna's heart. This lead her to believe that whatever happened when they got up the stairs - it wasn't going to be cuddling.

And she had no problem with that. She could see in Naya's eyes that whatever it was she had planned, she was sure about it. So was Dianna, then. Whatever Naya wanted, she wanted, too. If not more. She wanted Naya. All of her, for good or for bad, on bad hair days and through grumpiness and dorkiness, she wanted Naya and everything that came with her. And she wanted what was to come when they reached the top of the stairs. So without a doubt in her mind, Dianna moved her hands to grasp Naya's, intertwining their fingers, and turned them so she was moving gracefully backwards up the stairs - somehow by the grace of God not tripping, like her usual self would. But it was that, or take her eyes away from Naya. And she couldn't. If she did, she was afraid she would disappear. Everything would be gone - Naya included. That couldn't happen, not now. And Dianna couldn't let Naya walk up the stairs backwards. She would injure herself. And that definitely would've broken the reverie they were in.

"I the opposite of hate you," the blonde finally confirmed as they reached the top of the steps, her voice soft and hesitant, but leaving no room for doubt. She meant it, Naya needed to know that she meant it. "I always have," she all but squeaked, voice breaking under the intensity.

NEVER LET YOU FALL → RIVERGRON.

#t: never let you fall #nr

[lady-magick]

TAGGING → Dianna Agron, Naya Rivera.

LOCATION → Naya’s residence.

TIME FRAME → February 12th, 2013. Late evening.

NOTES → yg. vg.

NAYA RIVERA:

Even something as simple as holding hands felt wrong to Naya. Well, no, it felt very, very right. She wanted to be holding Dianna’s hand like they usually did, but because Santana was in the picture, she knew it wasn’t right. It was a small gesture really, not like they were suddenly throwing themselves at each other, but Naya felt like even that was betraying Santana. Maybe that was one of the reasons she pulled her hand back. She knew she’d done it to try to stand her ground, but usually that wouldn’t have been enough to stop her. Naya was terrible at standing her ground and being strong, especially when it was against Dianna. So, there must’ve been something deeper stopping her in that moment, and Naya was pretty sure it was Santana. The involvement of her counterpart just made this whole situation so completely unfair, and when she thought about it, Naya remembered why Dianna was the worst person in this situation.

“You did, you threw me away,” she interjected, cutting Dianna off, but then she shut up again, letting the blonde continue. Everything she was saying was actually sinking in this time, which it hadn’t done really with her last little speech, but Naya refused to agree with a lot of it. “Stop it, Dianna,” she sighed, clasping her hands together to keep herself from reaching out to take the other girl’s again. She was basically about to scold her best friend, and she needed some support and comfort when doing that, from none other than her best friend. But, that obviously wouldn’t have made any sense, so she made do with squeezing her own hands and playing nervously with her own fingers as she tried her best to, once again, stand her ground.

“If I’m always there, why did you do what you did with Santana? I know you’re not the type of person to use people, Di. You’re the best, most genuine person I know, and you would not do that, I know you wouldn’t, so you genuinely do care about her, or did care about her, I don’t know what you guys are now. But, you didn’t care much about me when you were all over my counterpart,” she said, her voice raising just a little bit, not loud enough to be classed as shouting, but loud enough to show she was growing a little angrier as her rant progressed. It may have served it’s purpose in being scary, were it not for the fact that tears had started to stream from Naya’s eyes down her cheeks, and she kept having to quickly wipe them away. She tried to ignore them, though, focusing on what she had to say. “You can hate me all you want for what I did, cause believe me nobody hates me as much as I hate me for that. It was wrong of me to use Darren like that and it was wrong of me to deny how I felt about you and hide it like that, but I never intentionally hurt you. You being with Santana? That seems like something you’d do to intentionally hurt me, and guess what? It worked, you did. What I did was bad, Di, but what you did sucked a whole lot more, so don’t even try to turn this around on me. I’ve punished myself for long enough, it’s your turn now.”

The entire time she’d been ranting, saying the things that she’d needed to say for the past three weeks now, Naya had just been getting more and more emotional. Her hands had unclasped and she’d reached out towards Dianna again, taking her hand back and holding tightly onto it for comfort, something she didn’t even mean to do and most definitely brought the tone of her rant right down. It was a typical Naya thing to do, though, so. When she realized she’d done it, she didn’t even try to correct herself by pulling her hand away, she just kept hold of Dianna’s, watching to see what she was gonna come up with next.

Looking at the blonde, Naya could see a certain look taking over her eyes. She could see this determined expression, and knew Dianna had something up her sleeve, even if Dianna hadn’t initially planned it. She didn’t know what exactly it was until the blonde began to move closer to her, and Naya didn’t even try to move back. She just sat there, watching the person she’d been trying to cut out of her life moving right back in, and she didn’t want to stop her. She should’ve really, considering she could now tell exactly what was about to happen, and the thought of holding hands had been enough to make Naya feel like she was betraying her counterpart, but she couldn’t seem to care about that right now. Dianna was about to kiss her, and maybe when she did, everything would start to make sense again. Every feeling that Naya had kept harbored inside and every word she’d never been able to say could maybe be expressed in this kiss. And as Dianna leaned in close, Naya’s grip tightened on the blonde’s hand, her free hand reaching up to rest delicately against Dianna’s cheek just as their lips met.

“Please don’t leave me again,” she mumbled quietly against Dianna’s lips after a minute or two of very intense, needed kissing, her eyes closing to hold back any new tears that may have managed to fall if she hadn’t. Even though she’d basically just yelled at Dianna, she took it all back when feeling that kiss. It was like she could suddenly hear everything Dianna had been trying to say to her, and she could tell Dianna everything she’d been trying to say too, all in that one kiss. It couldn’t last forever, though, and Naya eventually pulled back, though only slightly. She managed to stay close enough so that her forehead could press to Dianna’s, her eyes still closed and her hand still gently cupping the blonde’s cheek. “I’ve been trying so hard to hate you,” she whispered slightly breathlessly, “But I can’t, because I don’t hate you. I the opposite of hate you, Di.”

Freezing, Naya thought about what she’d just said and quickly shook her head. “No, I don’t mean that,” she said, though paused again momentarily, before realizing she’d spent enough time holding back her feelings and lying about them, “No, no, I do. I the opposite of hate you, and I know you the opposite of hate me, too. Just, I don’t know, kiss me again. I need you to kiss me again.”

DIANNA AGRON:

As Dianna spoke, she didn't even realize how much utter ridiculousness she was saying. Every part about Naya - the always being there, etc - was true. But everything else? It was stupid, in the most basic of terms. She had no idea why she did what she did with Santana, when it came down to it. She legitimately liked her, but she didn't just like Naya, and why she had sacrificed what she and Naya had for what was between she and Santana, she'd never really know. Did she regret it? No, not really. But if she hadn't, she was sure that she and Naya would be together right now, as opposed to whatever was currently going on. And that made her regret it.

The fact that Naya had dated Darren hurt Dianna, but she knew why. Even then, she knew why. She just didn't want to admit it to herself. Because it did hurt. And it wasn't that she wanted to hurt Naya back, but she wanted to feel better, and she figured perhaps Santana could give her that. And for a little while, she did. Until the emails opened Dianna's eyes to the truth again. But had she done it to hurt Naya intentionally? Never. Naya could do anything, and Dianna would never intentionally hurt her. Firstly, it wasn't in her nature to hurt anyone intentionally, and secondly, it was Naya. Even if she wanted to, she could never.

But at the root of it all, Naya was right. Dianna deserved to be punished. But instead of responding, she just allowed Naya to vent. She deserved everything that the girl could give her, and she was going to take it. If Naya didn't say it, they'd never truly be on the same page. Dianna said her piece, and now it was Naya's turn. But as she finished and their lips connected, due to the fact Dianna was lost as to what else to do, Dianna was sure that she heard more of what Naya was trying to say then, than when she was actually speaking. It always seemed to be that way when they kissed.

Even the first time they had ever kissed, Dianna had been able to feel every emotion coursing through Naya's system. Even the fear. It was like she could see into her soul, and that was true now more than ever. She was almost sure that Naya could do the same with her, but she didn't care enough to ask right now. Questions could come later. But sadly, after a few seconds, she felt Naya pull away. And just as she was about to brace herself for Naya kicking her out, telling her to leave and never come back, or something of the sort, she felt Naya's forehead rest against her own, and her words brought tears to Dianna's eyes. "I'll never leave you again," she whispered honestly. She never would. She'd never give up on Naya again. Not for the world.

Dianna's cheek leaned into Naya's hand as she listened to her speak, and her words either made her heart beat out of her chest, or stop completely. She wasn't entire sure which it was. And then she felt the girl freeze, but as quickly as she had done so, she melted, and it was all that Dianna could do to not release a sigh of relief. They were finally communicating, saying and doing all of the things that they had longed to for so long, and Dianna didn't want anything to ruin that. She wouldn't let anything. Not this time. Not even Naya or herself.

Sensing Naya's frustration with words, Dianna did exactly what she was told. Even if Naya was right and she did the opposite of hate her. But the request definitely wasn't one that she didn't welcome. The blonde had waited for what seemed like an eternity to hear Naya ask her to kiss her, and her stomach was bombarded with a swarm of butterflies as she finally did. So, kiss her, Dianna certainly did. But not before standing and pulling Naya up with her. Their angle was slightly awkward, with Dianna still sitting on the coffee table and Naya in the armchair, so, clearly she had to fix that. Instead, she pulled them both upright, and immediately grappled for Naya's hips, tugging her body against her own as tightly as she could manage. She needed this. She needed Naya. Closer. Impossibly closer. She'd have been fine with becoming one being, at that point. And she kissed her, fearlessly, confidently, lovingly, reassuringly, working to ease away all of Naya's worries, and her own. "I'll never leave you," she reaffirmed against Naya's lips. "Never."

NEVER LET YOU FALL → RIVERGRON.

#t: never let you fall #nr

[lady-magick]

TAGGING → Dianna Agron, Naya Rivera.

LOCATION → Naya’s residence.

TIME FRAME → February 12th, 2013. Late evening.

NOTES → yg. vg.

NAYA RIVERA:

Even before all the random kissing and progression of feelings from platonic to romantic had begun, Naya and Dianna had always kind of been like girlfriends. No, more like they were married, actually. When they were together, they’d constantly be in some form of contact with each other. They’d either be cuddled up together, or they’d be holding hands, or sometimes even both. Naya’s mom always voiced her concern about how she thought her daughter was a little too close with her best friend, but Naya would always just shrug it off, not even questioning it. Obviously it really did make them seem like more than just friends, though, considering the thought of Naya curling up on the couch with Dianna in her arms right now made the Latina cringe, even if it was the thing she wanted to do the most. To avoid slipping up and pulling the other girl into their usual couch position, Naya had chosen the armchair instead, and she could see the hurt wash over Dianna’s face when she did so, and felt terrible for causing that.

It seemed they were both doing things to hurt each other lately, and although what Dianna had done was the worst, in Naya’s opinion, she still felt bad when she saw that hurt look take over her former best friend’s face, and wished she could fix it. It wasn’t her place now, though. It was Santana’s. Naya wasn’t needed anymore. And honestly, that thought sucked and made her want to kick things and cry. So, when Dianna began to speak, explaining why she was there, Naya definitely hadn’t expected what she was hearing. “Confessing your love for me could be accurate?” She repeated, her eyebrow raising just slightly. Everything Dianna said after that all kinda rolled into one big blur, and Naya just kept repeating that one part in her head. She was pretty sure she heard an I miss you thrown in there, too, at one point.

When Dianna had finished speaking, only then did Naya actually notice the blonde had taken her hand, and Naya had intertwined her fingers with Dianna’s. Staring down at their hands, their fingers laced, Naya’s eyebrows furrowed, for some reason really focusing and concentrating on their hands. She felt like she should let go, that’d be the right thing to do, but she couldn’t. She hadn’t had this contact with Dianna in so long, it seemed, and she’d been craving it. Taking a deep breath, that she noticed came out a little shaky, Naya’s gaze very slowly moved from she and Dianna’s hands up to the blonde’s face, and Naya noticed her vision of the figure in front of her had become a little blurry. She wasn’t exactly crying, and would do her best not to, but her eyes were beginning to fill up a little bit, probably because she’d been wanting Dianna to fight like this for a while now, but it didn’t matter, because nothing was allowed to come of it, and it just wasn’t fair. So much so that it made Naya almost cry like she was currently. “I miss you too, Di,” she finally said at barely more than a whisper, her teeth sinking down into her lower lip.

“But, it doesn’t matter,” she shook her head, “Whatever we had or could’ve had is done. We lost our chance. I let you slip away.” Naya had spent a long time blaming herself, because she knew that if she’d just admitted her feelings, they wouldn’t have been in this mess. But she knew she needed to stop doing that. Dianna had hurt her more in the end, and Naya needed to punish her for it. It was hard, though, and when she finally pulled her hand away from Dianna’s, Naya was pretty sure it hurt her more than it hurt the other girl. “You threw me away, Di. You moved onto the next best thing, and why wouldn’t you? You deserve happiness. You deserve all the happiness in the world, and you clearly weren’t going to get that from me, so you moved on. Now you need to let me move on, too.”

DIANNA AGRON:

Despite the fact Naya spoke with no amount of uncertainty, her voice soft, but confident, she couldn't deny the fact that she wasn't even sure whether she was helping or hurting the situation. Maybe there was such a thing as being too honest? Perhaps she shouldn't have said as much as she just had, and instead, just shrugged Naya's question off and pulled out the vodka. But that wasn't Dianna's style. That wasn't what she was here to do. She knew what she was there to do, and if she did anything less, she was well aware of the fact that she would hate herself later. So, she spoke from her heart, whether it was for better or worse. She hoped Naya wouldn't get overwhelmed and basically kick her out, but even if that happened, Dianna would either respect her wishes and try again tomorrow, or take up residence on her lawn until she let her back inside or called the cops. You know, one or the other. She didn't care which.

It seemed like a fairly large step, grabbing Naya's hand. No matter what anyone said, that was the most intimate thing you could do with anyone. Besides sex, of course. So, second most intimate thing. Hands were essential to survival. They fed, bathed, touched. Everything that every single person in the world needed to get by. And when two hands were intertwined, you were giving up one of your life lines, and depending on someone to be half of the support for you. But it definitely wasn't a wasted effort, as she quickly noticed Naya's fingers intertwine with her own. If nothing else, this gave Dianna more encouragement. Whether Naya wanted it to be such or not, as long as she gave Dianna that much, she would always have hope. Even if she hadn't, the blonde would've just been that much more determined to get back to that point.

The seconds that passed between Dianna finishing her confession and Naya beginning to talk felt like eternity. But when she finally did, Dianna couldn't decide how she felt about it. The sound of Naya's voice filling the room filled Dianna's heart, and she made a mental note to just... keep her talking. Keep that voice around forever. Never let her stop talking. Even if you don't like what she says. Don't let her stop speaking. Let Hell freeze over, let the fire nation attack, let the children in Africa go hungry. ...Okay, maybe don't let that happen. But as long as Naya never stopped talking, Dianna would be content with whatever else came in life. Even if she didn't quite like what Naya was saying towards the end of her speech. Dianna wasn't extremely worried though. If she wasn't as determined as she was, she might have been. But no matter what Naya said, she wasn't going to give up, so. Hakuna Matata.

When Naya finished speaking, Dianna closed her eyes, and released a slow sigh. "Don't you get it, Nay? I didn't throw you away. I didn't move on to the next best thing. Okay, maybe I did the second one. But I didn't throw you away. That would imply you were gone, and you were never gone, Naya. You never could be for me. You're always there. In the back of my mind. In my entire heart, whether I want to admit it or not, and trust me, sometimes I really don't. Because you piss me off to no end. What I did was terrible, but you hurt me too, just moving on to Darren - even if it wasn't true - and blowing me and everything off. But none of that matters, okay? Because whether you piss me off or not, I'm sorry for everything, I'm going to do everything I possibly can to fix it, and I'm not giving up on you. And I just." Dianna paused, huffing quietly in frustration. Was she even making sense right now? She couldn't be sure.

So she did the one thing she knew worked for them. Even if it ended up getting them into more trouble than anything. She could always read Naya's mind when they kissed, and she knew it had to be the same way for her. It had to be. And clearly, words were just not working right now. And she had to show her. Somehow. Some way. Steeling herself with a deep breath, relaxing her features, Dianna leaned forward, connecting her lips with Naya. And in the kiss, she attempted to portray everything that she couldn't find the words to say - and when Dianna couldn't find words, it was never a good sign. She tried to convey how sorry she was, how much Naya meant to her, how much she missed her. Everything. Just... everything.

NEVER LET YOU FALL → RIVERGRON.

#t: never let you fall #nr

[lady-magick]

TAGGING → Dianna Agron, Naya Rivera.

LOCATION → Naya’s residence.

TIME FRAME → February 12th, 2013. Late evening.

NOTES → yg. vg.

NAYA RIVERA:

Even if she didn’t show it (at all), the moment Naya saw Dianna, every feeling she’d been trying to push away came flooding back to her. Their usual greeting protocol was to hug and maybe even kiss on the cheek, but the feelings Naya felt made her want to do more than that. Honestly, she wanted to grab the girl, pull her into the tightest hug she’d ever given her, and not even hesitate to kiss her. If it hadn’t been for Dianna and Santana becoming a thing, Naya was sure she’d have gotten over her fear of admitting her feelings by now, and she and Dianna would at least be secretly dating, if not openly. But, that wasn’t the case, Dianna and Santana were a thing, and Naya had to remember that. It was the thought that kept her face and voice blank and expressionless. No matter how she felt, she couldn’t let it show. Partly because she knew it wouldn’t change anything, but mostly because she could never do that to Santana.

Once Dianna had entered the house, Naya lazily pushed the door closed, so lazily that she didn’t push hard enough the first time, and had to attempt it a second time before it actually clicked shut. She hoped Dianna hadn’t seen, considering she was trying to be serious Naya, not typical, usual Naya. Rather than laugh at herself like she usually would’ve, she simply turned to face the blonde as she thanked her, nodding her head politely, though saying nothing. Instead, she just watched Dianna lift up the Happy Meals, listening to her speak. As usual, Dianna was being so effortlessly adorable, and Naya wanted to just give in and smile at her, but she knew that if she did that, she’d probably give in and let her feelings all spill out. So, she didn’t smile. She didn’t do anything other than step forward and take one of the Happy Meals. “Thanks,” she said in a smaller voice than she’d meant to.

Turning away from the hallway, Naya began to make her way into the living room, opening up the Happy Meal box and peering into it as she walked. She figured Dianna would be following her, and didn’t really care if she wasn’t. No, that was a lie, she did care. Naya cared more than she would like to admit out loud, although the emails had done that for her. But, she was trying not to care, so she was acting as if she didn’t. Still, this was getting incredibly awkward, and as much as Naya just wanted Dianna to leave, it had become apparent to her that she wasn’t going to, and once Naya had sat herself down in the armchair, Happy Meal in her lap, she let her eyes drift up to stare at the other girl. “Di,” she began, gently biting her lip as she held back a sigh, “Why are you here?”

DIANNA AGRON:

She had expected Naya to be upset. She had expected to have to work to get her to open up. She had even expected her to look as bad as she did - even though she didn't look really bad. That seemed to be impossible for Naya. Or maybe it was the fact Dianna found her beautiful on her worst of days. But this was... beyond what she had expected. Dianna wasn't even entirely sure there was a word to describe it. But whatever it was, she didn't like it. Not even a little bit. And she noticed. Dianna noticed Naya have to try again to get the door closed, and though she knew that she wasn't weak, it seemed weak. Naya, in general, seemed weak. Maybe that was the word she was looking for. But Dianna knew it wasn't true. She could see through every wall that Naya put up, whether the girl wanted her to or not, and she knew that Naya wasn't weak. Not even after everything that they had been going through. But that's how she appeared, at first glance, and Dianna hated herself for being the one to send her spiraling into whatever this was. A depression? That seemed too strong of a word. Maybe just a rut.

Dianna had decided that her first battle tactic would be just being herself. That had always seemed to work in the past. If Naya was having an off day, all Dianna usually had to do was be around her - not even do anything in particular - and before she knew it, she had her Naya back. But this time, she got a barely intelligible thanks. She visibly deflated for a second, grateful for the fact that Naya had exited the room so she could do so. Restoring her happy disposition, Dianna followed Naya into the living room, watching as she took a seat in the armchair. Not the couch, as she usually would have, so that they could cuddle. Not this time. And it was very possible that stung more than anything else. And then their eyes met, and Naya asked Dianna why she was there, and the blonde wished she knew.

After taking a few long moments to analyze her possible answer, Dianna decided her next tactic would be seriousness. Maybe being herself was a little too much right now. She'd save that for later. Right now, she had some explaining to do. Taking a seat on the coffee table in front of Naya, she wrung her hands, brows furrowing and looking down at her hands in thought before she began speaking.

"I'm here for you," she answered simply, at first, with a shrug of her shoulders. She looked up to lock eyes with Naya, almost losing her train of thought as she did so. "Those emails. They opened my eyes. I'm not..." Dianna hesitated, "...here to confess my love for you - even though that could be accurate, too, if we're being honest. But with every word that you wrote, I could feel my Naya slipping away. And I can't have that, because the world would be a really," she tried to think of a strong enough word. "Well. It'd be a really terrible place with my Naya. And it's not a place I want to be." Dianna swallowed, licking her lips. "I miss you. More than words could ever say, Nay, and I'm so sorry it took this long to fight for you. For us. Not even us, but our friendship." Dianna sat up straight, taking a chance and reaching out for Naya's hand hesitantly. "So. I'm here for you, Naya. That's why I'm here. Because I'm done giving up on you. And I'm sorry I ever did in the first place. That doesn't mean anything. It shouldn't. Apologies don't always work. Words are words are words, but I'll prove it to you. It's the actions that matter. The time spent, the sincerity, the... persistence. And I'll do all of that for you. Whether you want me to or not. Because I know somewhere, maybe deep, deep down. You want me to."

NEVER LET YOU FALL → RIVERGRON.

#t: never let you fall #nr

[lady-magick]

TAGGING → Dianna Agron, Naya Rivera.

LOCATION → Naya’s residence.

TIME FRAME → February 12th, 2013. Late evening.

NOTES → lm.

NAYA RIVERA:

Not a whole lot made sense in Naya’s mind right now. There was only one thing she was sure of, and that was how mortified she was over having slipped up and sent those emails to the last person that was ever supposed to see them. She also knew that, after doing that, she definitely did not want to see Dianna right now. It was bad enough that she had to see her at work, but there was nothing she could do to avoid that - other than quit her job, which Naya really didn’t want to do - but, she could avoid seeing her outside of work. She’d been doing pretty well at it, actually, considering she and Dianna had at one point been inseparable, and Naya had almost successfully managed to kick the blonde out of her life so quickly. All of that had changed again now, though. And, although Naya had been missing Dianna like crazy, these were not the terms she had ever planned to reconcile their differences on.

When Naya had first cut contact with her former best friend, she’d become quite the recluse. She’d stopped bothering to dress nicely, put on makeup, fix her hair or go out anywhere - other than to work - and she’d just lounged around the house wearing sweats all day and looking terrible. Well, terrible for her, at least. She’d started to move away from acting like that in the past week or so, though, and was starting to become more herself again. Naturally, sending those emails just pushed her right back into the recluse thing again, and currently, Naya was sitting on the couch, hair hanging messily down, and wearing a pair of old sweats and a hoodie. She was definitely in no mood for visitors, but once she’d given in to Dianna’s pleas and bribes, she’d accepted that she was going to have to be a human for a little bit. She wasn’t going to change or do anything to attempt to look decent, though. This would do. Her plan was just to take the Happy Meal and vodka, then for Dianna to leave, after all.

It was weird for either Naya or Dianna to go to each other’s houses and knock on the door or ring the doorbell. Usually, they would just enter, which was kind of what Naya had expected Dianna to do today, although she knew somewhere in her mind that she wouldn’t. So, whether weird or not, it didn’t exactly surprise her when she heard the doorbell ring. With a deep sigh, the Latina pushed herself off of the couch, bunching her messy hair up and draping it over one shoulder as she walked lazily over to the door, making no attempt to rush. Finally reaching it, she placed her hand on the knob, pulling it open and giving a blank expression to the figure standing before her. “Come in,” she said with no real expression, stepping aside and motioning the other girl into the house. Hopefully Dianna had something prepared to say, cause Naya didn’t.

DIANNA AGRON:

Honestly, Dianna couldn't remember the last time her heart had beaten so fast. As she stood at the door waiting for Naya - who was either taking her lovely time, or Dianna was really impatient - to answer the door, she couldn't sworn it was going to leap out of her chest and take off running down the street. She had reason to be nervous, yes, but to this degree? It seemed silly in some ways. This was Naya. Her best friend. The girl she could spend every waking moment with and never tire of her company. A few weeks ago, she could've asked Naya to go to Paris with a day's notice, and she would've been there, and everything would've been perfect for both of them. Things were easy, their friendship was easy. Basically, there was no drama to be found. Only the happiness and love that they shared. Be it platonic or otherwise, not even they knew at that point.

But, the thing was, things weren't that way anymore. Naya was still Naya, but she wasn't. Their friendship had been abolished the moment Dianna started dating Santana. Everything about Naya that was good and perfect seemed to disappear, and everything about them, too. Dianna no longer sent Naya random texts just to say she missed her. Their frequent hangouts and sleepovers became a thing of the past. Now, Dianna wasn't sure if Naya would even considering walking to the park with her, let alone going to Paris with her. Nothing was easy anymore. But at the root of it all -  whether Naya wanted to admit it or not - there was still the love that they shared, even if it's definition was blurred at the moment. And that was pretty much the only thing keeping Dianna rooted in her spot, waiting for Naya. So that she could fight. Not only for whatever was between them that certainly wasn't platonic, and that she felt with every word Naya wrote in those emails, but to fight for their friendship, mostly.

When the door finally opened, and Naya appeared, Dianna internally winced - though she maintained her composure on the outside - at her best friends... At Naya's appearance. This definitely was not Naya. Dianna had seen her at her laziest of moments, and this was ten trillion times that. This was just... weird. And not Naya-ish. And uncomfortable. But Dianna persisted, knowing full well that she was pretty much the only person that would be able to bring her out of her funk. "Thank you," she answered softly, walking into the house. She set her keys down on the table by the door, and held up the happy meals. "Okay, now, I brought happy meals, and I'm not entiiiiirely sure, but I think they're supposed to make you happy, so. That seems like a good thing for you," she nodded. "And if all else fails," she paused, pulling the vodka out of her bag. "This should do the trick." Dianna, ignoring all the awkwardness in the room, grinned genuinely. She could do this. She could get her Naya back. As long as she didn't give up, and at this point, giving up wasn't even an option that registered in her mind. Maybe she'd given up in the past, but Dianna was a quick learner, and no matter what, she'd never give up on Naya now.

NEVER LET YOU FALL → RIVERGRON.

#t: never let you fall #nr

[lady-magick]

NEVER LET YOU FALL → RIVERGRON.

TAGGING → Dianna Agron, Naya Rivera.

LOCATION → Naya's residence.

TIME FRAME → February 12th, 2013. Late evening.

NOTES → This is a few days late, oooohhh well.

Ever since reading the emails that Naya had accidentally sent to her, Dianna had spent basically all of her time trying to figure out how to go about doing... whatever it was she was setting out to do. Win Naya's heart? Gain her friendship back? She hadn't thought out all of the details just yet, but she was working on it. Either way, she needed to talk to Naya, and she knew from the very beginning that wasn't going to be an easy task to do. It didn't take a genius to figure out that Naya hadn't meant to send the emails, and due to that, she would most likely be huddled up in her little turtle shell and hiding from the world. And then, along with that, you had the fact that Dianna was still dating Santana - something that Naya was definitely not keen upon. But still, Dianna was determined to find a way to get through to the girl, no matter what the end goal was.

And apparently, the way to go about doing that, was persistence, McDonald's, and Vodka. Dianna had expected it to be a bit more challenging than it had turned out to be, but she definitely wasn't going to complain. If Naya wanted a happy meal and a bottle of vodka in exchange for an hour of her time - of which Dianna wasn't even entirely sure what she was going to do with - the blonde would happily give her that, with a genuine smile on her face.

It was intimidating, though, thinking of reuniting - for lack of a better term - with Naya since their kiss in Dianna's house, and Dianna beginning to date Santana. Yes, they'd encountered each other at work, but that was different. This was personal, and Naya already had herself closed off. Dianna knew that her job wasn't going to be easy, but she was extremely determined to accomplish it. And so far, step one - getting Naya to give her the time of day - was completed. And now, step two, figuring out what to say and how to say it was the next in line.

As Dianna finally got the okay from Naya, she slid out of her car. She had been sitting in Naya's driveway, due to the fact she really wasn't going to let the girl say no to her, and she knew eventually, Naya would give in. Even if it took a bit of work. Happy meals and Vodka in hand, she walked up to the doorbell, taking a deep breath before ringing it.

#naya rivera #dianna agron #rivergron #nayanna #glee rp #t: never let you fall #nr

[lady-magick]

“What a world we live in. I want to be incredibly close to the heart of it all. To live honestly, truthfully and to be completely present is the ultimate enterprise. And right now, I couldn’t possibly ask for anything more. I am a very lucky girl.”

#*

[lady-magick]

TEXTS → RIVERGRON.

NAYA: Yeah, the reason is I'm a doofus and technology hates me.

NAYA: Fine. You get an hour.

NAYA: And I want that Happy Meal.

DIANNA: Not quite where I was headed, but I won't argue with you right now.

DIANNA: Thank you.

DIANNA: I'm already outside with it.

#text: nr

[lady-magick]

TEXTS → RIVERGRON.

NAYA: Do you understand how utterly humiliated I am, Di? I can't face seeing you.

DIANNA: Do you understand how much I've missed you, Nay? There has to be a reason you accidentally sent them, and I'm not about to let it slip by. Just please, let me in. I'm not above standing outside and serenading you until you get irritated and let me in at this point.

#text: nr

[lady-magick]

TEXTS → RIVERGRON.

NAYA: I know what you want to talk about, and I don't want to talk about it.

NAYA: You just have to know I didn't mean for you to ever see those.

NAYA: I don't want to see you.

NAYA: Just leave the vodka and happy meal on my doorstep and you can go.

DIANNA: I'll leave the vodka and happy meal on your doorstep, but expect a little lamb to be sitting there with them.

DIANNA: I'm not going, Nay.

#text: nr

[lady-magick]

TEXTS → RIVERGRON.

DIANNA: Hello.

DIANNA: Can we talk?

DIANNA: I bet your first reaction was "No, go screw yourself."

DIANNA: But I'm hoping I can entice you with a bottle of Vodka with your name on it.

DIANNA: Also happy meals.

DIANNA: Please?

#text: nr

[lady-magick]

I THOUGHT YOU SAID IT WAS EASY? → DIANNA AGRON.

TAGGING → Dianna Agron, with mentions of Naya Rivera and Santana Lopez.

LOCATION → Dianna's residence. 

TIME FRAME → Late morning, Monday, February 11th.

NOTES → Revelations and realizations.

The clang of Dianna's phone falling to the floor from her beside table and Trouble's curious meow pulled the blonde out of her trance-like state. She had been emersed in a novel, but quite honestly, the last thing Dianna wanted was for Trouble to run off with her phone, and in turn, spend a half an hour sifting through his litter box - his favorite hiding spot - to find it. With a sigh, the blonde hoisted herself off of her couch and trekked up the stairs to investigate. Upon entering her bedroom, she spotted her phone laying on the floor beside her bed - which contained a sleeping Santana. Shining with new alerts, Trouble pawed at the electronic curiously. "Silly kitty," she scolded playfully, "iPhones are for Mommy." Scooping the phone and the kitten simultaneously off the floor, she climbed into bed beside her sleeping girlfriend. "Time to wake up, baby," she whispered, discarding her phone and Trouble somewhere on the bed to lean down and press gentle kisses on Santana's jawline.

Once again, her phone vibrated, reminding her of the alerts she had neglected. Frowning, Dianna shook her head. "Fine, fine. I'm coming," she huffed, abandoning her position beside Santana to locate her persistent phone.

(26) New E-Mails.

Dianna quirked an eyebrow, puring her lips. One the account the emails had arrived on, it was rare she ever got more than five or so at a time. Her work email was a different story, but this one was unusual. Swiftly she slid her thumb across the bar, unlocking her phone. Automatically, it jumped to her email, and Dianna's eyebrows pulled together, forehead creasing. All 26 emails were from Naya.

In the three weeks that she and Santana had been together, contact between Dianna and Naya had been limited. They saw each other at work, but that was the extent of it. And even that was awkward at best. Dianna was happy with Santana. For the most part. A large part of her wished that she could have her friends back - go back to when everything was simple. But she couldn't bring herself to regret anything too much, not when she had Santana in her life. But still, there was a void, and even she couldn't deny the way her heart sped up. Maybe Naya had changed her mind and didn't hate her. But 26 emails? Well, maybe she didn't like the first 25 and tried to amend them. It was a long shot, but with Naya Rivera, you never quite knew what she was going to do next.

Deciding that going in chronological order was the best idea, Dianna scrolled the entire way to the 1st email, and pressed it to open.

SENDER: [email protected]

DATE/TIME: 02/11/13, 7:10 A.M.

SUBJECT: Hi.

Hi. I’ve erased that like a million times, cause I wanted this to be the perfect email. I know, emailing you is kinda lame, but it felt more personal than a text and less scary than face to face, and far faster than a hand written letter. Although, you’re worth the effort of a hand written letter. You’re worth the effort of a million hand written letters, all on the most expensive, greatest quality paper. Wow, okay, that was lame and kind of intense. Anyways, hi. There are a lot of things I’ve been wanting to tell you, and I never found the right words to say them. I’m not good at talking about my feelings, that much is probably evident by the fact that I’ve been denying how I’m feeling over and over again. Of course, I’m sure it’s also evident that there are feelings there, because, why else would I have kissed you so many times? Not just when filming.

I like kissing you. I like spending time with you. I like spending time with you more than I probably should. Well, no, not more than I should. I guess I mean, more than someone should like spending time with their best friend. I really feel like I should be saying all of this to your face, but that thought scares me a lot. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, honestly. I know I can talk to you about absolutely anything. You’re who I come to with every problem or any new thing going on in my life, and although this isn’t a problem, it is definitely new, and I can’t exactly talk to you about it, because it involves you. Okay, I’m not even making sense anymore… Way to go, Nay, you’re doing great here.

Okay, I think I’m just gonna stop rambling and get right to the point here. Finally. So, if it wasn’t already very obvious, I like you, Di. I like kissing you, I like spending time with you, I like who I am when I’m with you. I like you. As in, like like you. I’m not sure how much further my feelings go, I haven’t really been able to sort through them all in my mind, but I know there are feelings there, and I feel like you’re reciprocating them every time you kiss me back. I feel like I can feel what you’re thinking through your kisses. That was so lame, wasn’t it? Whatever, anyway, I don’t know if I’m even gonna manage to send this or not, so it doesn’t matter. I’m probably gonna read it over and over and over and freak out and erase it all. But, we’ll see! On the off chance I did end up sending it, and you read it, please don’t hate me. If this whole thing is weird or creepy or whatever, then just tell me and I’ll stop. I don’t want anything to come in between us, especially not feelings. So.

Anyway. Gonna end this here. Love ya, Di.

xoxo Nay.

As Dianna read the email, tears welled in her eyes. Quickly, she stood from her spot on the bed, and walked out of the bedroom, her phone clasped tightly in her hand. Stepping onto the back porch, she crossed her arms across her chest and gazed down at the screen blankly. Of course, Naya couldn't have sent that three weeks ago. Except. No. It wouldn't have mattered, anyway. Dianna had Santana, that was all that matters, and no amount of confessions from Naya would change that. She... loved her? Did she? No, not really. She cared for her. Deeply. She loved her. But was she in love with her? Not by a long shot.

Hit with the realization that she still had 25 emails to go, Dianna steeled herself with a deep breath, and moved on to the next. As she reached the emails that had apparently been written after she and Santana had become a couple, she winced. Naya had easily been mean to her over text - which the blonde would never fault her for - but these emails were simply... heart breaking. At their very best. At the end of the day, Dianna missed Naya more than she cared to admit. And she still felt for her more than she cared to admit, too. The idea of proving everyone right, still having feelings for Naya in that way despite the fact she was practically living with Santana, was utterly unappealing, but that didn't make it any less true.

Over the span of an hour, Dianna read through every email. Every word penetrated her soul, ignited feelings she had managed to repress. At points, she couldn't help but smile at Naya's dorkiness, or her lack of will to not admit that she missed Dianna. At some points, she cried. For multiple reasons. Wishing she could go back and change everything, somehow get Naya to send this before she met Santana so everything could be simple - the way she had fantasized it could be when whatever happened with Naya first started. But mostly, she cried because she missed the girl. Feelings aside, Naya was her best friend, and reading and feeling her emotions through the emails made Dianna miss having her in her life in general. As best friend or lover, it didn't matter to Dianna, and she couldn't believe that it had taken her this long to figure it out.

As much as she could try to blame Naya for everything - and there were definitely things that Naya could be blamed for - Dianna herself was just as much, if not more to blame. Naya was worth everything. Naya was worth all of the stars in the sky, and the moon herself. But Dianna had sold her short. She had given her away without a second thought because things got hard, and she got scared, too. And then, worst of all, she didn't try to fix things, and instead, took the easy way out, instead of fighting for the girl that she was convinced she had loved since laying eyes upon her. Okay, maybe that sounded way corny, but it was true. Dianna was a firm believer in love at first sight, and Naya was the epitome of that. Everything about her drew Dianna in from the very beginning, and the blonde hated herself for giving all of that up because it was easier than fighting for what she knew they both wanted.

Dianna hastily wiped at her cheeks. The question now was what to do. Maybe the emails weren't even supposed to be sent. That was very likely. It wasn't like Naya to do something so bold. But either way, it was done, and she knew she needed to react in some way. As Dianna stepped back into the warmth of her house, she meandered into her living room, her gaze somewhat ironically catching on to a picture of herself and Naya in Paris, the day before their first kiss. And in that moment, Dianna knew what she needed to do. She needed to fight. It would kill her to hurt Santana, but she knew that she would be okay. Just like she herself would be okay. And Naya would be okay. Everything and everyone would be okay in the end, and if it wasn't okay, then clearly, it wasn't the end.

Nobody ever told Dianna it was easy, fighting for what you love and listening to your heart. But it was worth it. She knew that much. The rest? Well, the rest she could figure out as she went along.

#nr #sl #st: easy

[lady-magick]

Okay. Then yes, I'll come sit with you. You aren't mad at me, right? I mean, should I rally the troops to protect me from your wrath?

[Private] Quinntana kiss huh?

Yeah I’ll talk to you.

#sl