memesideblogthing

[memesideblogthing]

The Adventure Zone: Balance ask meme------ 

Contains mild (out of context) spoilers from the Balance arc. Taken from both the podcast and the graphic novels (as such a lot of these are specifically from “Here There Be Gerblins” and “Murder on the Rockport Limited). 

"Abraca-fuck-you!"

“Come on, ride the train. It's the choo choo and ride it!“

“Oh nooo! The mystery is solved! You’ve solved my final riddle, you are thee new riddle master.” 

"Bad news, compadres, this place is magic as hell."

“I got punched so hard I almost died! I’m not gonna go toe-to-toe with a crab while you’re armed with a terrible Scottish accent, and ____ doesn’t even have his shield! I’m out!”

“Listen, listen, I got a plan - let’s go eat some ooatssssss. Spectral oooatssssss."

"Hot diggity shit, this is a baller cookie."

"You're going to be amazing."

"I'll be having my body back, you undead fuck."

"How would you like to live forever?"

"We've chosen the perfect person for this, it's like sending a mildly eloquent piñata in!"

“Thanks for the chess game, and... kiss my ass, you sanctimonious bastard."

“Sometimes there aren't good decisions. Sometimes there's just decisions.”

“_____ good out here!"

“______ Rushes in.” 

"Between the fan and the fancy umbrella, I'm one 17 inch waist from Scarlett O'Hara."

"Hail and well met, my dudes."

"How many cares one loses when one decides not to be something, but to be someone."

“Oh shit. Sweet flips.” 

“Not all exits are made equal.” 

“What if you didn’t have to worry and you could just cut out the bullshit and do good recklessly?” 

“Hey thug what’s your name! I’m about to tentacle your dick!” 

“i mean I did detective enough to see through your bullshit.” 

"This isn't a dungeon, people do business here!"

"Let 'em know, kid."

“It sounds like a cat trying to yodel.” 

“You’re not going to hit a fucking ramp!” 

“And the way your cousin kept saying ‘this is the last job you’ll ever need! The Last Job You’ll Ever Need!” 

“Let’s put it to a vote: all in favor of the nice lady not exterminating us---”

“Were you waiting for me? I actually already said my one cool thing.” 

“Who would have ever thought it wasn’t chain-proof?” 

“Wait. Was the solution ‘kill it’?” 

“That’s right cro-magnons, I can make the weather with my hands.”

“Can we assume you were kicked out of your family because of your love of Kenny Chesney?” 

“Won’t it be bad for your bodyguard career if you don’t save your client?” 

“If it weren’t for me, he’d be the biggest asshole in our family.” 

“This will have to go into your personnel file!”

“I do that!”

“You threw my wolf in the fire!”

“He’s got you beat on pure mass, but you’ve got more impressive definition.” 

“No...the exact median between John Goodman and John Stamos...”

“I got news for you buddy boy. I’m not really big on the rules.”

“Home, microscopic home.” 

“See? Answering someone’s question isn’t hard at all. Is it?” 

“He told me ‘I’d like to see that silverware one more time before I die...!’“

“Unless...” 

“As usual, it’s up to me to save the damn day.” 

“I already stole it from Blockbuster.”

“Let gravity do the work.” 

“He’ll do something magnificent. Or stupid...Or both.” 

“That’s the part you’re going to be horny for.” 

“When you ran away---Sorry, when you strategically withdrew.”

“I would love to share this parlor scene experience with you.” 

“I think he means ‘go through the door’.”

“Everybody place their bets on how far I can throw ____!”

“That’s all for tonight folks! Tip your waitstaff! Try the veal!”

“Guys! Guys! That was our first moment of competence!”

“14 is nothing! I shit and take 14 damage!”

“Isn’t this your cue?” 

“I would love to get my tapas on!”

“You went through that whole spiel just to rip you sleeves off, didn’t you?” 

“Is that shag carpet?” 

“Let’s grab he McGuffin, get the hell out of here, and get to the base before karaoke night.”

“There are no dogs on the moon. It’s for their own good. We worry they’ll just run off the edge chasing a stick or something.” 

#rp meme #ask meme

[memesideblogthing]

Overheard Lines ---  A collection of things I heard during college. Feel free to change pronouns and such as needed! 

What? Is it casual Friday for Prince Charming?

I'm a lawyer at Wolf Enterprises, I handle family matters.

I don't want to do homework. I just want to sit on the table and do nothing.

I'm a little disappointed there wasn't more quinoa in my quinoa bowl... That's so Seattle hipster.

I had a dream where I baked a cake inside a ceramic pig.

I have a spoon I can't take that into the bathroom!

WHY DID YOU TAKE OFF YOUR SHIRT?!

I can't feel my face. 

I WILL DO IT! I WILL TAKE THE DOOR TO MORDOR!

How about you _____? How are your toenails?

You know, sentences like that would make no sense one hundred years ago.

LETS SEE IF YOUR SCIENCE CAN GET YOU OUT OF VIRTUAL SHRUBBERY THEN WE'LL TALK

Did you just lick my hand...? I know what a tongue feels like.

I’LL HAVE MY VERY OWN HAND CRAFT SHEET FORT!

I didn't realize my w cig was in my pants...now it tastes like salt and disappointment.

Wow, look at that. Virtual sunset.

No one suspects THE STATION WAGON

You can't spit in the freezer.

I JUST RHETORIC’D YOUR RHETORIC! YOU’RE A TERRIBLE PRESIDENT.

Oh no. Not the never ending train of jeeps.

Look at ____ and his hair that's too big for his head. 

That is a rock not a ramp.

You're not a fish unless you have a conversation

It's for an acting class!

My calves are burning...

I don't want an owl, you can't put a diaper on an owl.

You're a nice cheap lamp.

I am a slightly hysterical houseplant.

If you had slept together no one would be dead.

You're better than I am, I just came in, stood on the chair and started poking it."

Don't burn yourself on the laundry.

Blow one more note and...I will sit here and stew in my apathy.

...Maybe we could do without the murder.

I choose pizza over everything.

Do you ever just...feel like screeching?

I'm so tired I would laugh at just about anything.

I like your sweater...it's like an iceberg in summer.

So you mean it's like ones digging from china and the other from the US and MAYBE they meet halfway?

I'm giving a toast...to toast!

I'm melting the candy cane.

I'm Scottish and French. I just get mad at the British and don't do anything.

#rp meme #role play meme #roleplay meme