moonlitinfinite

[moonlitinfinite]

Tim drake is a reverse Brucie Wayne. The media sees him as a hot, competent, prodigy genius, teenage CEO, and heir to not one but TWO fortunes.

But only the people who really know him, that he's able to trust, recognize that he is actually a pathetic wet sewer cat in the vague shape of a floppy haired moron.

[moonlitinfinite]

Duke, after joining the family: Guys, I think I accidentally pissed off Batman.

Dick: What makes you say that?

Duke: Well, he was reviewing my last report, and when he was done he just sort of stared at me stone-faced for a minute and then grunted and went back to what he was doing.

Tim: Was it like a "hrrghn", or was it more of a "hurmmf"?

Duke: What?

Tim: The grunt.

Duke: Like a "hhrmn" I guess? Does it matter?

Jason, laughing: Oh, trust me, it matters.

Dick: Don't worry, he's not mad at you. He's actually impressed with your report, that was him giving you praise.

Duke: How could you possibly know that from a grunt?

Damian: Father often has trouble expressing himself in words, so we've all learned to discern between his different grunts to be able to understand him.

Duke: *snorts*

Everyone:

Duke: Oh, you guys are serious.

Jason: Dead.

Tim: You would be wise to start studying now, Batmanese has a lot of tonal indicators.

Dick: I'll go find you my old flash cards.

[moonlitinfinite]

Piper: So, you guys are pretty good friends, huh?

Annabeth: No.

Percy: Yes ???

Annabeth: ?? We’re married ?

Percy: But are we not friends?

[moonlitinfinite]

random little jason grace hcs:

thumb rings. he wears thumb rings

huge physics nerd. like, he's not particularly good at it. but he loves it!

obviously transmasc aro

proficient in like every weapon, like every weapon. bow & arrow, battle-axe? yeah sure. but also, mace and chain, bagh nakh, gauntlets, deer horn knives, flails... fuck, he can even use a shotgun.

can run like really really fast. he's a runner. that being said he can also run really far. (like, roman soldiers walk up to 20 miles every day. with full armour. his endurance is fucking off-the-charts.)

most obscure music taste ever

very iffy about using his powers beyond the occasional electricity stuff, just because how much people in CJ would be terrified/rumour-y/plain weird about it.

loves drawing

actually a nerd in everything, not just physics.

has definitely bashed in someone's head with a shield at least once

huge fan of rollercoasters, hates horror movies

before fights he like to clean his glasses, for no reason at all.

people have told him countless times to not wear glasses during a fight because that won't end well if you're punched in the face but he keeps them on regardless. his reflexes are too good to get punched anyway 🤷

obsessed with barbie

no like. he and apollo do matching "i am Kenough" hoodies all the time

also besties with literally half of the gods across multiple pantheons

scribbles with pen on his hand all the time

chronic migraines guy

he goes feral in a fight then one second later he's like 🥺 'hey guys glad we got out of that one unscathed. y'all saved my ass'

he's never received any proper sort of love or affection (specifically during his younger years), so he deals with that by showering all of his friends with unlimited love <3

all the demigods and all the minor gods and some of the major ones too love him. hence he has a bloody huge, well-deserved protection squad

HE'S THE BIGGEST SWEETHEART EVER

he tore out krios's neck with his teeth and then smashed him to literal pulp with his own armour

[moonlitinfinite]

all versions of superbat (Clark/Bruce, Tim/kon, Jon/Damian) happening in the same universe would be amazing bc I want to see the superhero community at large realize in horror that all kryptonian men have a genetic predisposition to sticking their dick in crazy.

[moonlitinfinite]

is nobody going to talk about how nico fucking RAISED THE DEAD BY GIVING THEM SODAS AND HAPPY MEALS?!?!?!?!?!

#percy jackson #pjo text post #nico di angelo #son of hades

[moonlitinfinite]

Hey there! So long time no see!

Bruce: So you all have a mode of transportation for the gala tonight?

Dick: Of course Bruce, save a four wheeler and ride a speedster.

Jason: Got it covered old man, save a harler and ride an archer.

Tim: Don’t worry Bruce I got it, save a limo and ride a country himbo.

Damian: Obviously father, save a wheel and ride the boy of steel.

Bruce: Mortified and facepalms.

Feel free to reblog/like!

[moonlitinfinite]

What an icon <3

[moonlitinfinite]

dick: so you think joker will be invited to harley and ivy's wedding?

bruce: he'll be there. in spirit if nothing else.

harley 24 hrs ago: so we're gonna have a clown pinata, one for the adults an' one for the kiddies, so EVERYONE gets a chance ta beat the shit outta a clown

bruce sipping a margarita while he flicks through a bridal magazine: nice

[moonlitinfinite]

What if everyone in Gotham knows who Batman is? They all know, they just don’t say anything. It’s not something that is spoken of or acknowledged in any way, other than the occasional glance or shared look of understanding. But they all know. Except for Brucie Wayne. Lord bless their himbo sunshine child, but he seems to be the only person in Gotham that doesn’t know who Batman is. He must be protected at all costs.

Everyone in Gotham knows who Batman is. (They’re wrong)

[moonlitinfinite]

Commissioner Gordon:

Batman: *scowls*

Commissioner Gordon:

Batman: *scowls harder*

Commissioner Gordon: *takes a bite out of his Superman ice cream bar while looking Batman directly in the eye (lens)*

Batman: *full bat-glare*

Commissioner Gordon: *takes another bite*

Later

Dick: *showing the video to everyone with glee*

Duke: Man, I miss all the good stuff.

Cass: Did you send it to Clark yet?

Dick: What kind of son do you think I am?

Dick: I sent it to the entire Justice League.

Steph: Babs’ dad has never been cooler.

[moonlitinfinite]

this has definitely been done before right

[moonlitinfinite]

damian, waking up in the morning: Ah, ready for another fantastic day of being better than tim.

[moonlitinfinite]

[moonlitinfinite]

me when people spell damian’s name wrong (aka with an “e” instead of a second a)

[moonlitinfinite]

How I Think Tim Should Tell The Batfam He Lost His Spleen

Tim: Hey, you know how there are infinite universes and therefore infinite possibilities?

Jason: Where is he going with this?

Dick: Nowhere good.

Tim: And you know how there's probably a world out there that's the exact inverse of our world?

Steph: Yeah, definitely not something good

Tim: So that means there's a possible universe where I lost every organ but my spleen

Dick: What- and I mean this in the nicest way possible- the fuck??

[moonlitinfinite]

reblog if you want to live in bikini bottom coz...spongebob

#spongebob