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onigirishawn · 5 years

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the traveler (I)

a/n : hey ! this is my first au series. hope you guys like it! it’s a lil diff. I previously published an old version of this and then I deleted it ahahaha

summary : Taking place in the year 2250 in Heredon, Y/N is a historian with burning questions about what the past has to hold. In desperation for answers, she makes the risky decision to time travel to the past where she meets someone who might have the answers.

[a lil sci-fi? I’m an amateur tho] [1930s! shawn] [time travel au]

“I never want to leave.”

“Then don’t.”

“Rise and shine Y/N. It’s 8 o’clock in the morning. You have exactly an hour to get ready for your appointment with Christian. I’ve set your-“

“I got it Xipha.” You cut your little digital Chrome off and groaned into your pillow. You turn your back against the sheets and stare at the glossy white ceiling.

“Shall I prepare breakfast for you in the meantime?” Xipha asks. “That would help.” You answer.

You stood up from your bed and stand in front of your window, taking in the breathtaking view of Heredon. Xipha had the blinds open and you could hear the coffee machine running in the kitchen. Xipha was your digital personal assistant and controlled all the appliances in your home based on perfect knowledge of your preferences, such as your toast. Even your toast was done perfectly. You lived a privileged life like this for years and it all wouldn’t have been like this without Christian, your caretaker since you were young. He found you abandoned on the outskirts of Heredon when you were a child and he took you in. Ever since then he raised you well and has always remained supportive of you.

You walk into your bathroom to take a hot shower and exit. You’re satisfied seeing your uniform perfectly prepared by your Chrome, Xipha in your wardrobe. You exit the bedroom with your form-fitting uniform and your sleek low bun. You walk out , heading over to the maglev elevator that brought you to Christian’s office.

Taking a deep breath, you wait outside his door that read, ‘Dr. Christian Creed’. The door analyses your identity, letting you enter shortly after.

You see Christian’s back facing you, he gazes at the view of Heredon from his glass window.

You fake a cough that earns his attention. He turns to you and a big smile curls in his lips. “Y/N, darling.” He opens his arms wide, allowing you to rush to him. He takes you into his arms and places a kiss on your head. “How are you?”

You slowly back away, initially wishing to let him know you were alright, but then it hit you.

“What is it darling?” He asks worryingly.

You sigh, looking away from his worried gaze , “I’ve been having those dreams again.”

He shakes his head , “Have you been taking the pills?”

You defensively answer , “Yes.. nothing seems to be working. I keep dreaming about this guy and-”

”New pills have new side effects. It won't last long though. Take it consistently and you’ll gradually stop having these dreams alright? You’re still recovering from that accident you had a few years ago.” Christian reassures you and your worry slowly starts to fade. You had almost forgotten that you were 22 when you got into an accident with Christian, costing you the memories you had before you were 22. Christian had told you countless times that your dreams were side effects of the accident. You trusted him and you simply nod, ”Alright.”

After your encounter with Christian, you settle into your own office. As you work on your computer, an incoming call is projected across your room.

“Accept.” You say and it digitally accepts.

“Hey Y/N, it’s Raven from Level 14, Tech department.” A familiar voice answers.

“Oh hey Raven. Yeah uh what’s the matter?” You ask while you continue analysing your research material.

“Can you come over to Level 14? We need your help. There’s this time device that we have trouble with. We’re hoping you could help us recheck if we’ve installed the eras correctly or something inside it.”

Time device?

“Uhh can you be more specific Raven? What’s the device?”

“It’s this time travel device. We’re supposed to have it done by today and have it sent out.”

Time travel? You’ve always heard about this incredible concept of time but you never thought you’d get to witness it first hand . You were more than ready to witness it. A part of you even wishes you could try it.

“I’ll be there.”

“So Y/N that just seems about it?” Raven asks, arms crossed.

“Yeah actually. As you can see here I’ve corrected the error on this era. You guys named it wrongly.” You inform while tapping a few changes on the device’s screen.

“Right. Thank you so much Y/N.” Raven says as you finally finish up. You take a step back to admire the marvellous device, it almost seemed like a kid who sees candy right in front of them. Curiosity was killing you and a part of you just couldn’t stop saying, “This could be the answer to all your questions.”

“Hey, I’ll call in all the others to have a look on it alright? You just stay here.” Raven says and walks out of the place. The door closes right after she leaves.

This was your chance.

“Y/N are you crazy” you whisper to yourself.

The temptation was taking over you, “This could be the answer to all my questions that I’ve had for years.” You tell yourself.

By the next minute you find yourself already on the platform, clearly unprepared and clearly going against all Heredon laws but you were ready for whatever the past has to holds and there was no turning back to what you already tapped on the control system of the device. Shutting your eyes tight and clenching your fists, you hope for the best.

Your eyes were still shut but a foreign sound of rustling sent the news to you that you have finally arrived. With enough courage, you slowly open your eyes. Your heart was relieved over the fact that the device actually worked.

You put your hands to your chest and let out big breaths of relief. A faint laugh escapes at the amazement of you successfully time travelling.

You were in front of a wide lake, enclosed by trees. The weather was chilly and you immediately tried to wrap your arms around your body to warm yourself up. The sun looked like it was about to set soon and you immediately try to figure out a way to get out of the woods that you were in. Dejavu hit you like a meteorite. It’s almost as if you knew this place from your dreams.

So this is 1935

You disembark yourself on a walk , hoping you’ll find a track out of the woods.

The sun was setting, darkness was engulfing the whole place now. You started to worry, you were still walking but you couldn’t find anything new. Exhaustion was taking over you, your legs endured some minor splinters and cuts from all the times you’ve fallen down on any fragments of branches on the ground. You just couldn’t take it anymore. You’ve been going about like this for hours without hydration. You felt like an idiot coming unprepared.

“M-must go further.” You try to pant out with your dry lips. You find yourself on a slope. With your sore legs, you try to walk on further to the end of but you ultimately collapse, sending your body tumbling down the slope and hitting your head against a rock.

And that was all you could remember.

You woke to a strong scent of pine wood invading your nostrils. Your eyes slowly flutter open and you squint in an attempt to sharpen the blurred images. You glance around, unfamiliar to the deserted room that you’re in. How long have you been here? Where am I? Am I alone? You try to remember what exactly had happened and it hits you like a bang. The memories of your collapse in the woods occupy your mind.

Cool air hit your skin and your hair felt strangely relaxed. It didn’t take you long to finally realised you weren’t in your Heredon uniform or your sleek bun. Your body clad onto a silk nightgown and your hair was free from its bun and was in a heavenly mess of long curls. You raise the sheets you were under with one hand and find that all your cuts and splinters had been dressed in an unfamiliar manner. Who treated me?

Your curiosity was interrupted by the sound of a thump and footsteps on the wooden floor coming from outside the room. You could feel your heart racing and immediately retracted back to your sleeping position. You could hear the creak of the door as it opened, your heart was beating in fear and sweat was forming on your temples as the sound of the footsteps got closer and louder. Whoever it was, their eyes were clearly burning on you and you could feel it.

Anticipating for the worst, you hear a glass set down on the mahogany bedside table. Shortly after, you could hear the person walk back out of the room, closing the door as he leaves. Your eyes flutter open again, but this time you were freaking out. The thought of a stranger’s presence in this house engulfed you in fear. You are literally in the year 1935, all alone. What’s the worst that could happen? Probably you getting killed or something.

You throw the sheets off of you and jolt out of the bed. Looking around the room, you find that the stranger had laid down a glass of water beside you. You walk over to the window where the light shone through, informing you that it’s broad daylight now and you probably slept in the house through the night. You were still in the woods, except in this case you were in a cabin.

Trying to find a way out your hands reach over to a piece of metal on the window, turning it like a knob. You find that it enables the window to go wide open. Taking your chances, you swing your leg over and jump out. Without hesitation, you jolted out of the place.

Your heart was racing and you kept turning your head back as you ran, hoping you weren’t being chased or something. Looking back forward as you ran, you immediately stop in your tracks. Your breathing hitches and your eyes widen to the foreign being.

“What the fuck?” Is that a fucking bear?

It was huge and it definitely did not look friendly. There weren’t any bears in Heredon, in fact you don’t even know if they still exist. One thing for sure is that you have to run away from two things now.

You knew you were fucked when it looked back at you. You could’ve sworn you saw it spew saliva upon seeing you, its eyes darkened and it looked like he hasn’t eaten in days. Poor bear but there was no way you’re gonna let yourself be its next snack. The second it jolted to you, you ran on your bare feet, earning more and more splinters on your run out. “I’m fucked! I’m fucked!” You kept screaming.

As you ran you felt a strong force on your body pull you to the ground. A hand went on your mouth to muffle your screams. The more you screamed the stronger you were muffled. Even with both hands, you struggled to get rid of their grip on you.

“Shh, shh” the stranger muffling you said. The deep voice indicated he was definitely a man.

Your body was against his behind a large tree. With much struggle, you turn your head to face him and your eyes met with the most beautiful hazel eyes you’ve ever seen. Not forgetting his other charming features too. You could’ve sworn you might’ve forgotten that you were literally hiding from a deadly bear during that moment.

“Stay quiet and we’ll be safe.” He whispers. You simply nod, still taking in the view of the charming man. His grip on your body tightened and you weren’t quite sure if your heart was racing due to the extremely close contact you had with this man or the fact that there was a bear out to get you.

“Okay, the coast is clear.” He speaks again. You release his hand from your mouth, your back still against him. Realising that he’s a complete stranger, you escape from his grip and turn to him. Before he could say anything you raise your hand and place a hard slap across his face. A second later your hands come to cover mouth, shocked to what you have just done. He cups his own cheek in response, his blood rushing to his cheek, causing it to turn red.

“I-I’m so sorry. I-I-“ you tried to take it back. He puts a hand up to stop you, “It’s alright.” He winced to the pain and all you could do was stare and feel guilty.

“Come on , let’s get out of here.” He says and speed walks away from you, hand still on his cheek. You follow him back, and you’re back.

Obviously he was the man in the cabin who you tried to run away from. Your cheeks go red to the embarrassment. He had already saved you once and he had to save you again.

He followed him to the porch of his house and he frustratingly opens the door and leaves it open for you to follow in.

As you step in the house, you look over to see him in the kitchen, running water to clean his hands You make your way to the kitchen and stand at the doorway. You noticed his jacket from before was off which left him in a grey tank which showed off his prominent biceps. You bit on your lower lip, lowkey admiring the view of this stranger.

“How’d you find me?” You ask with your arms crossed. He turns to look at you, and now you’ve gotten a better view of him than before. The light that shone through the window illuminated every crevice of his body that looked like they were sculpted by a Greek god. His curls were a perfect mess and his face, oh God was he charming.

“You were unconscious in the woods. Your head hit a rock.” He explains and turns his back on you. Running the sink back on but this time he grabs two glasses and fills them up. He comes over to you and offers you a glass. You nod and accept his offer. A sense of relief in him starts gushing in because you’ve finally given into his offer.

“So you treated me last night? What happened to my clothes?” Disgust started to come to you, “How did I wear this?” You say and point at the nightgown you were wearing.

“I washed your clothes and about that ..” you notice his eyes downcast to the floor, a sly smile appearing on his face. You scoff, “Oh fuck you!” You slammed the glass on the table and leave the kitchen, heading back out to the porch. He follows you from behind, “Don’t be like that, please! I’m just kidding!”

You look back at him, “Look, I don’t even know you. I really have to get going. So I’ll appreciate it if you pass me back my clothes and let me go on my own from here. I’m thankful, really, you saved my ass twice and let me return the favour by not having you do it for the third time.”

He sighs, “Hey why not you calm down a bit and have a rest. You looked like you went through a lot. I’m just a random guy who saw you out there and I wanted to help.” He continues, “Also, it takes an hour to get out of this place with the correct route. If you wish to go out alone again then you might just die this time.”

You wanted to fight back but what else could you say. He was right. You were just startled but he looked like a man who genuinely cared. He knew this place. You don’t trust him wholeheartedly but you decided that the only way out of this place was him.

“I wish to leave. Can you get me out of this place?” You ask.

“I’ll be leaving for my weekly market run in three days. You can follow me by then to head straight to town. I also hunt and go to the other side lake for fishing daily. If you wish to leave at anytime then I’ll be glad to let you go but you’ll need to find your own route out of the place.” He informs, “Just not now. It’ll be dark soon by the time you wish to leave. Unless you wish to leave then sure.”

Despite how much you’ve kept your guard. He has been doing nothing but a favour for you. After sometime you finally answer, “Fine.”

You take out a hand for him, “I’m Y/N.”

“Shawn.”

Ahhhh so this is my first. I wrote this while I was really tired so I’m so sorry if there are any errors :P I’ll have it checked again later! Anyways hope u like the story, it gets more interesting later on hehe

I’m still figuring out what time setting should I put this in. Haha

IM NOT THE GREATEST WRITING IM SO SORRY AHHHH

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes preferences #shawn mendes one shot #shawn mendes fanfiction #mendes army #shawn mendes masterlist #shawn #mendes #leiaclaudette

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onigirishawn · 5 years

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Ya’LL WHEN SHAWN FLIPPED CAMILLA TO THE BED I WAS LIKE “I CAN SLEEP PEACEFULLY NOW” CUZ ITS JUST SO WEIRD THAT WE FINALLY SEE HIM DOING IT AND YA KNOW WE ALWAYS READ ABOUT HIM DOING IT IN FANFICS AND LIKE YA’LL WE SEE IT NOW AND IDK WHAT AM I SAYING IM JUSTCISJFKAJFKSJF

#senorita #shawn mendes #SHOOK

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onigirishawn · 5 years

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THIS

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onigirishawn · 5 years

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hIS ARM and his face and everything OH MY GOD im-

#iamquaking #ijustcant #hessoperfect #what the fuck #mendes army #mendes #shawn mendes #kill me now god

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onigirishawn · 5 years

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Does anyone have the video post of the 2 girls singing Katy Perry which angers a poltergeist in the house and it slams the door to their room

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onigirishawn · 5 years

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The most precious siblings 🥺❤️

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onigirishawn · 5 years

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rainy afternoon

hey guys it’s 3am and I’m bored :P

summary : arguments are resolved better while cuddling

word count : 1.3k

You took a deep breath and ran your hands through your second day locks. You were stressed out with all work you had to get done by Monday, which was tomorrow. Things weren’t easy between you and Shawn either, just a few hours ago you two got in a heated argument about Shawn’s hectic schedule, and how it’s taking a toll on the relationship.

“You’re extending the tour?” You ask. “Don’t get me wrong babe, I think that’s great but don’t you think it’s a lil’ too sudden?”

“Shouldn’t you be happy for me? I get to travel around the world.” He answers with frustration.

“I get it Shawn. It’s just.. we haven’t found the time to spend time together and you being gone for another 2-3 months?” You continue, “What about that trip to Hawaii we planned to have during that time? Have you forgotten?”

Shawn sighs, “Look babe let me make it up to you, come on tour with me.” He comes over to you and takes both of your hands. You scrunch your face, “Shawn, I’m working too. I can’t just give up my schedule just for you.”

Shawn lets out a frustrated sigh, his phone rings, to which you just roll your eyes, “Take it.” You say and walk away. You knew it was work and when you got in your bedroom, you heard Shawn answer, and you were right, it was definitely work.

Of course you were happy for him, but you were stressed out and the thought of not having him for another few months killed you on the spot. You were really looking forward to the holiday trip you both had planned to Hawaii during one of those months, guess it needs to be rescheduled.

You stretched out your hands and propped your seating again on your shared bed with Shawn. You were alone in the bedroom, while Shawn was in his own lil’ studio doing his own thing.

Looking over to the corner of your laptop screen you notice the bar being dangerously low. You reached over to the side of the bed where you connected the charger to the laptop and you continued your work. Not so long after, you could hear tiny raindrops hitting your window which at first didn’t bother you, but soon after, you noticed it started to get heavier and heavier. It started to distract you, automatically trying to put you in a lazy mood. The reoccurring thunders didn’t help either. All you could think about was calling Shawn in to join you in bed and cuddle while taking an afternoon nap.

You shrugged off the idea and tried to shift your focus back to your work. Then the power went off.

“What the fuck?”

The lights in the bedroom were cut off and you could hear the faint sounds from Shawn’s stereo immediately die. You looked over to the corner of your screen and found that with no power in the house, your laptop was no longer charging. Frustrated at the limited amount of time you have to do you work until your laptop finally dies, you quickly type out your work and make sure to save it every few minutes.

Your bedroom door opens, and you didn’t bother looking, you knew it was Shawn. Your eyes narrowed to the content of your work, scanning every little line to ensure there was no error.

You could feel Shawn’s eyes just burning on you from the corner of the bed, but you still didn’t bother looking at him. He let out a little sigh.

“Power is out.” He states the obvious.

“Yep.” You reply, still focusing on your work.

“You wanna cuddle?” He asks, and from the corner of your eye you could see his hand scratching the back of his neck.

You scoff and shake your head, unbelievable. But what the hell of course you wanted to cuddle. You just wanted to drop everything with him but you weren’t willing to swallow your pride up.

“Alright then.” He answers to your silence. He props himself on the bed, next to you. God. His scent was killing you and was calling you to his arms.

You could feel his gaze on you, trying to get your attention.

“Work?” He asks. You nod at the obvious.

“But didn’t you finish it up last night? The one due tomorrow, I mean.” He asks again. As much as you tried to ignore him you couldn’t help but to be in awe at how he takes note of how you are doing at work. In fact, he remembered what you’ve done more than you could remember. You did in fact finish it up last night. This whole time you were working on something due later than Monday. Which gave you more excuses to just give it up and cuddle with Shawn.

He rests his chin your neck and wraps an arm around your waist. “Come on babe, let’s just drop everything and cuddle.” He whispers in your ear. You finally give in and turn to face him. His chocolate eyes stared deep into yours and his soft curls looked like a hot mess. He pouts.

“You do realise I’m still mad at you right?” You asks, raising your voice a little to accommodate the heavy rain. You were still keeping your pride.

He sighs, “I know. Can we talk about it? Like try to figure it out?”

You nod and put away your laptop. You cross your arms, “Let’s talk.”

“Can we cuddle and then talk?... while cuddling.” He asks. You resisted a smile that was desperately trying to creep in. You just nod and you and Shawn lay down on the bed, chest to chest. Shawn has his other arm wrapped around you, while his other hand laced with yours.

“I understand you’re upset Y/N.” He says. “I know we had a lot planned during those few months and I-“

You cut him off, “I’m more than happy for you Shawn. Honestly, just go on with the tour.”

His raises a brow and you continue , “I mean, your fans are dying to see you. It’s merely a favour that you get back out there and give them a show.”

He lowers down to kiss your forehead , “What did I ever do to deserve a girl like you?”

You smirk, “I wonder that too.” He chuckles and brings you closer to his chest.

“Just Shawn, I hope it doesn’t happen again. Maybe the team should plan ahead of time instead of making it a lil’ last minute.” You reason. You continue, “And we are still going for Hawaii afterwards alright?”

“Note taken.” He nods. “I love you.” He says.

“I love you too.” You whisper into his chest.

A sudden thunder sends you to a little shock and Shawn strokes your hair , “Shhhh. I gotcha babe.”

“We solve things better while we cuddle huh?” He laughs. You hit his chest playfully and he pulls you in closer, “We should do it more often.”

The power wasn’t coming back on anytime soon. The room started to get cold because the heater wasn’t turned on but Shawn’s embrace was enough to warm you up. Shifting in your sleep, you two ended up settling yourselves with your stomach down on the bed and Shawn’s leg straddled loosely around you, and his arm still wrapped around you. He would occasionally bring his head closer to you and give you a peck while you slept and you just couldn’t help but to smile whenever he does.

You were crazy in love with this guy.

Hi guys I think I’m like half-asleep or smth so I know it’s a lil crappy 😫😫😫 Anyways, might edit it out later hehe xx

#shawn mendes #shawn #mendes #shawn mendes fanfiction #shawn mendes fluff #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes preferences #shawn mendes masterlist #mendes army #leiaclaudette

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onigirishawn · 5 years

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onigirishawn · 5 years

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“Meanwhile, back at Wild World”:

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onigirishawn · 5 years

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before I go (part II)

summary : your time was running out [dad! shawn] , [super sad]

word count : 3.5k

read part 1 here

You sat silently on my bed, pen in one hand, a half written letter on the other. You spent the last hour writing , ensuring the you use the write words to whatever you were writing.

This week you wanted to make sure you get out of this hell hole to spend time with Shawn and Beth at home. To your surprise, the doctors gladly agreed to the idea.

You looked over to your packed bags and smiled, in a few more hours you were gonna come back home. The only place that could make you feel better.

Finishing up on a paragraph, you stop there and reach for your diary where you slip the paper in.

The door creaked open and revealed a smiling Shawn, “Hey babe, ready to go?” He asked. You smiled and nodded excitedly.

The trip home was long but you were just glad to finally be out of the hospital. You take in the scent of the car that you haven’t been in for a while. Shawn’s hand reached for yours, and he brought it up to kiss it, his eyes still focused on the road. You smiled and stretched your body to his to kiss him on the cheek.

“I’m so excited to come home.” You whisper into his ear. His grip on your hand tightens, “Home is excited for you too dear.”

___

After a while, you fall asleep , Shawn looks over to your deep slumber. You and Shawn’s hands were still interlocked but as you slept he felt your grip weaken and slowly release. He sighed, taking in his devastation he’s been hiding inside about everything. He couldn’t help but to let a tear drop, not so long afterwards he started to silently sob. His hand reached over to his mouth where he bit on his knuckles to control himself , making sure he doesn’t wake you up.

Shawn accepted your fate.

As Shawn parks in the driveway, you wake and you finally see your home. You take in the view, it felt like it’s been forever since you’ve last seen it. The best part was that you finally get to see Beth! You looked over to Shawn and gave a big smile. You unbuckled your seat belt and exited the car.

When you went to grab your bags, Shawn hurried to you, “Babe I got it.. okay?” He said and immediately carried the bags.

You nodded, “Thanks babe.”

“Mummy!!” You heard a familiar cheer. Looking behind, you see your daughter running towards you. You got to one knee and embraced her.

“Oh darling, I missed you. How are you? Who’s home?” You ask.

“Aunt Aaliyah, grandma and grandpa.” Beth smiled. You smiled. You’ve been wanting to see Shawn’s parents and Aaliyah while you were away.

You walk into the house and you’re greeted with warm hugs by Aaliyah, Karen and Manny. All of them understood your state.

“Darling how are you?” Karen asks you.

“I’m good... just happy to be back home.” You smile.

“We are so glad to have you back Y/N. House sitting was hard! You know this place too well. There were things going out of control-“ Manny was cut off by Aaliyah, “Haha what he meant to say was that, we are so glad to finally have you back Y/N. Let’s have some tea in the living room.” Aaliyah smiles, inviting everyone into the living room.

“Aha! Pay up.” I say with my hand out to Aaliyah. Aaliyah groans and starts to take out some of her fake cash. 6 of us have been playing Monopoly for the past hour now.

“Mummy! Why does Aunt Aaliyah have to pay?” Beth asks innocently. Beth was in your team as always.

You kiss Beth’s forehead and Aaliyah responds for you with frustration “Well I’m just unlucky today. But this doesn’t happen all the time!! You’re lucky this week.” Aaliyah defends. Everyone laughs.

Every weekend Shawn’s family would come over to play Monopoly and other board games. It’s just been a routine and today was just another one of them.

“Oh darling you’re going bankrupt!” Karen laughs at Aaliyah. Aaliyah shakes her head in disapproval and Manny jokingly pats her back to cheer her up.

“Hey guys excuse me for a bit, I’m gonna get a drink.” Shawn says and walks into the kitchen. Karen follows a few seconds later.

Shawn opens the fridge, hoping to find a drink. But really he just needed to calm himself down. The whole family gathering situation was a lot to take in, he wasn’t sure why, maybe because he just couldn’t stand to think that this was probably the last game they were gonna play with you. He didn’t want to get his feelings in too much this week but it just came to him. He hated himself for it.

“Shawn..” he hears his mom call. She knew exactly why he was in there.

“Yeah mom?” Shawn sniffs, still focusing his gaze in the fridge, tightening his grip on the fridge door handle.

“Darling look at me.” Karen says worryingly. Shawn gives in to his mom as always and closes the door. He looks over to his mom , revealing his distress.

“Oh Shawn..” Karen says and cups his face. “I know it’s a lot to take in.” She says. “I love her so much too, we all do. But she just really needs all the love and support now. She doesn’t want to see you like this.” Karen says.

Shawn just looks down to the floor. Shawn nods, taking in his mother’s advice. “Let’s continue playing yeah? Just like every other weekend.” she suggests.

The two walk in back to the living room to continue another round.

The game had wrapped up hours ago, and everyone had went back home. Beth was fast asleep in her room and Shawn was fast asleep beside you. It was currently midnight and you couldn’t sleep. You were in excruciating pain, but it didn’t feel new. You had to withstand the pain and you would occasionally walking over to the bathroom to take big breaths to overcome the pain. You’ve taken your meds already but it didn’t seem to help.

Slipping out of the sheets, you step out of the bed and walked out of the room quietly. You weren’t quite sure why you decided to get out but it felt right. You walked into your hallway, where you admired all the decorations that you had collected in the house. You and Shawn have been living in the house for almost 10 years now. You guys moved in while you were dating and practically shared everything in this house. You admired the photo frames that decorated your walk down the stairs. You took the time to look back at every single one of them.

From the days you and Shawn were still dating, to your wedding photos, to Aaliyah’s graduation from uni, to Shawn’s big win at the Grammys and finally to your family photos with Beth. Everything were hung perfectly, and you remembered vividly at the time Shawn accidentally hammered his hand to get a nail into the wall to hang up the photos.

“Shawn are you sure?” You ask while putting down a box and wiping a sweat from your forehead. You put your hands on your hips and observed Shawn balancing himself on a stool with a hammer and a nail in his hands. “Yeah of course babe just shhhhh.” He answered. You rolled your eyes.

The house phone rings loudly which immediately sent Shawn screaming, “FUCK!” He drops the hammer and you rush to him. “Oh no!” You look over to his thumb. He had accidentally hammered himself. Shawn winces in pain and you couldn’t help but to laugh. He looks over to you, “Y/N I’m in pain over here while trying to put up our wedding photo. Why are you laughing?”

“I’m sorry babe..I can’t help it.” You laugh. You slowly take his bruised finger and pepper it with kisses. “You’re a brave man, these kisses should heal.” You say confidently. Shawn relaxes.

“I was thinking of an ice bag or something but hey this would do.” He smirks.

“Any other reward for my bravery?” He asks.

“I’m saving it for the bedroom.” You wink.

You laughed after recalling it, you remembered everything so vividly. There were so many memories just coming back.

You continued to walk down the stairs where you decided to walk into Shawn’s lil office aka his mini studio room.

You walk over to his vintage turntable you got him as a gift years ago. You choose a record, ultimately ending with you and Shawn’s favourite, (which is your choice ) You start to play it on the turntable, humming to the music and slowly swaying your hips.

“Y/N?” You heard a voice enter. You look over to the doorframe and find Shawn, leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed. He was probably watching you for a while. You blush to his sudden appearance, feeling slighty embarrassed.

He walks over to you and takes your hands. He brings you closer. He places one arm around your waist, “Why are you up so late?” He says

You both automatically start to slow dance to the music. You rest your head on his chest, still moving to the music.

“Couldn’t sleep.” You murmur into his chest.

“I see you chose our wedding song?” Shawn asks.

You look up to him, “Yeah.. felt like it you know.”

Shawn nods, “Do you still remember our dance?” He asks. You nod.

“Alright then.” He backs away from you.

He was replaying the exact choreography you guys had,

He takes his hand out , “Y/N Mendes, will you care to take this dance?” You smile and happily take his hand. He twirls you in his arms as you both start singing to the lyrics. The both of you danced so smoothly, not forgetting or missing out a single step. Everything came so naturally and it almost felt as if you were reliving that wedding night again.

An hour later, you’re still in Shawn’s arms with your head resting on his chest, he’s still rocking you. The music was left at its last track and you heard the music slowly die down.

“Promise me you’ll be there for Beth at all times.” You say. “Like at all times .” You added. You feel Shawn nod.

“Of course. I’ll always be there for my two girls.” He reassures.

“Promise me that you’ll be there during her first day in school.. middle school, high school, college... graduation, her wedding, everything!” You ramble.

Shawn slowly rubs your back and reassures you again, “I wouldn’t want to miss it for the world.”

“Good.” You murmur.

“I love you so much Shawn. Like so much.. you have no idea..” you start to ramble out of the blue. You feel Shawn chuckle, “I know you do. I do too.” He answers.

“I’m not sure what I did to deserve you Y/N.. you are literally the best thing that’s ever been given in this world. I can’t thank you enough for everything. For being my wife, my best friend a mother of out daughter— you’re just incredible.” Shawn confesses.

“You’re an angel Y/N. You’re my angel. Always will and always will be.”

You wake up at around 5 o’clock in the morning, you wake up in Shawn’s arms. Today felt different.

And for some reason, you knew what today was.

“Mummy!” You hear Beth barge in. “Darling..” you call. Beth hugs you in bed. And although it was far too early in the morning, this was all you could’ve ever wanted. You, Beth and Shawn on the bed.

Shawn awakens to Beth’s cheerful demeanour. “Hey darling,” he calls groggily. “What are you doing up so early?” He asks. Beth answers, “I wanted to rest with mummy and daddy for a few hours.” Shawn smiles, “Of course darling, come here.”

Beth snuggles between you and Shawn. You and Shawn just smile to how cute your daughter was being.

“So Beth, tell me, what do you want to be when you grow up?” You ask.

“I don’t know mummy. Maybe like the guy we met at the hospital.” She answers. You chuckle, “A doctor?” She nods. “Because they always help out mummy and help other people who are sick.” She answers innocently. You look over to Shawn, clearly impressed. “Well whatever you wish to become darling, make sure you work hard for it okay? Make mummy proud.” You say as you caress your daughter. She nods, “Of course mummy.” You start peppering your daughter kisses, “I love you so so so much baby.” Beth laughs because your kisses felt like tickles. Shawn joins in and peppers Beth with more kisses, adding more to her laughter. It was a perfect moment.

After sometime, she slowly drifts to sleep. And you made sure you watched her drift to sleep, taking in the view of your child sleeping peacefully. You wrap your arms around her. Shawn, still awake, looks to you, he gives you a kiss on your pale lips.

He wraps his arms around the both of you. All 3 of you slowly drift to sleep, you whisper to Shawn before drifting to sleep, “This was the best life I could’ve ever asked for.”

Beth steps on the school stage with Shawn guiding her from the back.

“Daddy I can’t..” she whispers. She was clearly nervous. “I know you can Beth, I’ll be with you yeah?” Shawn reassures. “But today is Mother’s Day, not Father’s Day, why are you with me? All my friends have their moms on stage.. and I don’t.” Beth whines, almost in tears.

Shawn kneels down to look into Beth’s eyes, “Hey.. mummy is in here okay. She’s with us. She always will. Remember what I taught you? Mummy’s an angel. She’ll always be here.” Beth nods.

Shawn and Beth walk to the centre of the stage. Where the event was starting to take place. Beth was meant to present her mom for Mother’s Day celebration today, but Shawn had to take your place.

The event was starting soon, everyone was taking their seats, leaving only Shawn and Beth on stage. Beth looks over to Shawn for a final reassurance, and Shawn nods at her to take her place.

“Hi guys! My name is Beth Mendes and today is Mother’s Day.” Beth speaks through the mic,

“Here I have my mummy.” Beth points to Shawn. The crowd murmurs in confusion. Beth starts to get nervous and holds onto Shawn’s hand tighter. She speaks again, “S-Sorry I mean daddy.” The crowd is clearly confused. Shawn could see people whispering, some have understood what had happened which provided sympathetic looks.

“You can do this!” Shawn mouths to his daughter. She simply nods and speaks again, “My mummy wasn’t able to attend today’s event. But she told me that she’ll always be with me in heart. So she’s somewhere in here.” Beth says joyfully, trying to ignite positivity in everyone.

Beth opens a handwritten letter in her pocket, which surprises Shawn. It was long and he didn’t recall seeing Beth write it before.

“Dear mummy, today is Mother’s Day. Thank you for giving me all the love in the world. For taking care of me since I was inside you, to delivering me healthily, teaching me how to walk, talk and about all the amazing things in this world. I remember how you ran back to the store to buy me my favourite teddy bear when you forgot which I still sleep with every night. Thank you for caring for me when I was sick and thank you for caring for daddy when he was sick too.” Beth adds, smiling at Shawn. She continues, “I’m so grateful for the years I had with you. I could’ve never met you... or lost you when I was younger.. but mummy you stayed until I was this old! I’m very grateful for that. You’ll always be my mummy, forever and ever.” After Beth recites her long speech, she looks over to the crowd, “I hope everyone has a great Mother’s Day.” Beth ends the speech. The crowd gives a large applause. Shawn was basically in tears. Beth says to her father, “I’m sorry daddy I didn’t mean to make you cry.” Shawn shakes his head and hugs Beth tightly.

Shawn walks over to the dresser. He looks over at all Y/N’s stuff still left. She organised all her makeup very nicely and had family photos all over the sides of her mirror. It’s been almost two months since you left.

Shawn opens the drawer, and finds a white envelope. It looked somewhat new. He slowly ripped the envelope open and it revealed a long written message in your beautiful handwriting. His hands started to shake nervously but he had to read it.

To my darling,

I know you hate it when I leave letters like these. But you know how I am... I love to play tricks on you and give you surprises.

Shawn, I want you to wake up everyday and think about how blessed you are to have Beth in your life. She’s an angel. Our angel. I can’t imagine a world if anything happens to you or her, so please give her all the love and raise her right. I trust you, with all my heart. That’s why I married you.

I want to thank you for everything you’ve given me. Since the day we met, since the day we started dating, to when we got engaged, married and had Beth. You’ve been my pillar of support all this time. I’ve been yours too. Thank you for dealing with my antics, reminding me to do what’s right, comforting me when I’m down, dealing with me when I’m hormonal and stressed... just everything. I love you with all my heart.

Your happiness means the world to me, so don’t stop doing what makes you happy. Keep writing and doing music okay baby? You are a talented soul. Music is your passion and I’m so happy to be a part of it for all these years. I will never forget the time you won your first Grammy.... and then the many other Grammys the following years. Remember all the awards you won just off the songs you wrote about me? I’m so proud of you and I always will be.

Please take care of yourself. I can’t stand seeing you sick or depressed. It hurts and worries me so much.

Life has been so amazing with you and Beth and I’m eternally grateful for it. Thank you so much darling.

Yours, Y/N

Shawn was already in tears, sobbing loudly. His sobs echoed in the empty home.

[A YEAR LATER]

Shawn’s absence from the media made headlines. He haven’t been on social media for almost a year since your passing and not a single work on music. His fans understood at first but it started to worry them.

What Shawn was really doing was trying to be the best father for your daughter. He made sure he had all the time with your daughter. He would occasionally sob on his own when he realised he needed your support and help in certain things but he did everything he can to be a better dad and to raise Beth right.

He didn’t give up music instead, he was doing everything at home. His close friends knew and supported him. Even though he thought he wasn’t doing well, you were proud of him, he was actually doing really well.

Shawn was sitting in front of Teddy and Andrew. The three of them were focusing on some lyrics.

“Shawn, it’s amazing.” Teddy says.

“No no no! Something is missing.” Shawn says in frustration.

“Shawn, we’ve been through this many times. It’s perfect. Everything about it.” Andrew says reassuringly.

Shawn bites on his fingers, worried. Teddy and Brian pat his back, giving him a reassuring look.

“She will love it Shawn.” Teddy says,

“Shawn Mendes releases a surprise album entitled, (Your choice!! Drop me a few suggestions and I might edit it w your name suggestion), in memory to his late wife Y/F/N and dedication for his daughter, Beth.”

“It’s perfect, the lyrics, the vocals, everything about it. It’s truly a beautiful album.”

“You could feel the passion.”

Shawn’s latest album dedicated to you was a success and received positive response. Even though it was a great victory for Shawn, he was just more than happy to release an album dedicated to you. His album cover? It was a beautiful black & white and slightly grainy photo of you taken from far. His entire theme for the album was candids of you. He didn’t care what people had to say, the album was for you.

You will, and forever will be his angel.

I’m so sorry it took me forever to update. I’ve been thinking this whole thing through for the whole week. Hope you guys liked it ♥️

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