qcellbit

[qcellbit]

it does make me very sad that i had to abandon this blog because the stress from trying to participate in fandom (in general. not just this one) was slowly killing me. it takes a massive amount of privilege to have your fandom experience be a purely enjoyable escape from everyday life rather than a cruel, constant reminder that you can only participate in your hobbies at the expense of your own safety, comfort & morals. i shouldnt have to sacrifice anything to theorise about my favourite show and post drawings of its characters online, and yet i was! everyday! and it was causing me an immense amount of grief and i had to give up yet another blog and another major interest. because even though that interest was giving me a lot of joy and inspiration, that could never outweigh the pain i was experiencing from being involved in the fandom at the same time.

#mine

[qcellbit]

Shout out to all the Black ppl that can no longer participate directly in the fandom they love because of the stresses of racism 👍🏾 you contain multitudes of value and I'm sorry that the color of your skin and the power of your voice makes people not want to acknowledge that.

#reblogging again with the addition. very elegantly put #ive been trying to word this myself for years now

[qcellbit]

lps guapoduo for the soul

#HOLY FUCK #qsmp

[qcellbit]

if you're wondering how much fun cellbit is having he just rage quited and said hes coming back on 2 weeks 🩷 he said hes not sure if he's gonna drop out of the event, but yeah...

[qcellbit]

wdym wilbur coming back sealed it for you??

oh i just mean that the day wilbur came back was on the same day as a major qsmp event which he was clearly not aware of and the event was awkward and loud and started two hours later than it was meant to because wilbur coming back at the same time delayed it and the two things had nothing to do with each other and disrupted each other. and by "sealed it" i mean it was clear to me that nobody learnt anything from this and it was bound to keep happening and nothing would get a chance to breathe with the major qsmp events that would all clash and happen at the same time and i was right because yesterday rubius and luzu came back and did their rp which people have been waiting for since nine hundreeddd thousandfucking years ago and it Sucked because nobody could pay attention because so much was happening and every character was involved at once and i clearly cant articulate this well but this isnt how youre meant to run rp servers at all .

#ask #mine

[qcellbit]

i am really not having fun watching qsmp at all at the moment the administration has been horrible its soooo disorganised and nonsensical and misguided

#im not saying they arent trying hard they obviously are but theyre doing The complete wrong things #literally every characters arc has been ignored or halted or ruined because of admin intervention which is not how rp servers should work #things have been steadily going downhill for like two months imo but wilbur coming back is what really sealed it for me #mess!!! i dont wanna watch something that nobody is enjoying and i dont wanna watch something that makes no sense #mine

[qcellbit]

Bad, about Cellbit pulling a knife on Tina when Bad jokingly said to kill her: “It wasn’t anything to do with Tina, it was like throwing a ball and saying fetch.”

#JESUS

[qcellbit]

bobby painting with roier and cellbit might be what finally gets me crying. family rituals are eternal..!

#mine

[qcellbit]

OUGH.... Cellbit saw Pac's posters, checked they were taken by Pac, kinda smiled a little, then said "Fair" and backed away

#the smirk was devious..!

[qcellbit]

"just dont lose yourself, okay?"

"i cant. i've tried to."

"Don't forget to enjoy this, today. Cuz if you lose yourself in trying to hurt the people who took it, you might....just don't forget the good stuff, okay?"

"i cant. i've tried."

godddd cellbits recurring motif of "i cant. ive tried." whenever someone tells him not to lose himself, both the bad and the good is so.. the implication of a perpetual fruitless spiral of turning man to monster and monster to man, and failing at both because loves too deeply and instinct is ingrained into him deeper than the carvings in his knife. he cant fucking stand himself. he can't stand how he can't be normal and has to rely on drinking copius amounts of coffee to stay awake enough to not lose it. he can't stand how even in the depths of his desire for vengeance, he hears the pain in his loved ones' voices and still stops to listen. these two parts of him have to be incongruous, because he knows he was happier when he was one without the other. and yet, time and time again the people who care about him tell him not to lose himself like they view him as whole. and again and again, he tells them that he can't. because he's tried to break himself in half and it doesnt fucking work like that. and he'll continue until he destroys himself because hes fucking Tired of being whole.

#god lol.

[qcellbit]

cellbit's gift for tilin.. weh

#mine

[qcellbit]

lets fucking go

trans qbaghera win again #girl

#mine

[qcellbit]

Slimecicle: "Damn you're hot, anyways I have this medical problem and I want to get help so maybe you know good doctors or-" Cellbit: "We should kill the feds." Slimecicle: "huh?"

#literally.....

[qcellbit]

CELLBIT CALLED BOBBY FILHO WHEN CALLING HIM OVER I HOPE I DIEEEE

#mine

[qcellbit]

flippa gave the flag to slime and he put it as his backpack display item ;__;

WAIT AWH

#mine

[qcellbit]

WAIT AWH

#mine

[qcellbit]

my favourite thing about watching cellbit is when he randomly pauses whatever hes doing to tell a sad story about his childhood like when a metal gate fell on him and he was stuck underneath it for hours crying for help likw ? ok cellbit. and then he just moves on

#that fucking story he always tells about getting scammed out of all of his items in some game as a kid #or the scary maze game story #hes the only streamer i watch as a streamer idk what about him has managed to captivate me so. everyone else i only tune into for lore #mine