shelostthewarwithinherself
fuck this
Depression. Anxiety. PTSD.
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“2020 might be the year I finally fucking disappear.”
Me Tillie (Kilg0)
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She ate… with her parents knowing she shouldnt be eating because the number on the scale isnt right.. and when she went into her room she looked in the mirror and cried… feeling full and sick knowing if she didnt eat she would be skinny and empty..
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A few nights ago, it was around 11pm and I was sitting in my driveway. An older man in his 40’s+ was walking by and saw me get in my car, roughly 10 minutes later he approached my car, opened my door and he put his hand over my mouth, I could smell the alcohol on him. I did not know this man, I was frightened, terrified, in shock. I wanted to call the police but he had already threw my phone in the backseat. As he had his hand over my mouth, he used his other hand and went in my pants.. he threatened to kill me with his gun if I said anything. I never saw this gun, but I was afraid and just took it uncontrollably crying. I was violated, abused, sexually assaulted. Before he went any further, a cop with his flashers sped by, he got spooked and took off. Before he took off, he told me if I reported it that he would come back and kill me. I have a 4 year old son.
I never reported it. I see his face everywhere. I have flashbacks. I have nightmares. I have panic attacks. I think about suicide every day. I’m terrified of my apartment.
Since my 24 years of living, I’ve been molested a total of 5 times, 4 of the other times I was just a little girl. Why do men think they can do whatever they want to a female?
#depression#anxiety#suicide#suicideideation#death#panic#panicattacks#flashbacks#hurt#pain#sexualabuse#molested#broken#metoo
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We try to change, but we end up hurting ourselves. //
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