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“i feel like i have no purpose” You are not a fixed entity. You do not have one grand, singular, constant purpose. As long as you have genuine intent behind your actions, everything you do serves a purpose. As long as you are truly present, you notice that everything contributes to a greater whole. You do not need to dedicate yourself endlessly to one practice to achieve a purpose; allow yourself to oscillate freely between them all. Experiment. You are not one dimensional: treat yourself as such.

#mental health posting

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i actually dont mind tumblr posts reposted to pinterest. the 13 y/o "pinterest in the only social media my parents let me have" girlies deserve a little treat

#funny posting

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Taivan dynamic is so much more painful if you think they were just hooking up pre-crash, not involving their emotions at all, just Van who was pretty easy to clock as gay & Tai who wanted to kiss a girl and thought Van wouldn’t mind.

Like if pre-crash, they never thought about being anything more than teammates who sometimes made out in the empty locker room. Then everything changed in the wilderness when all of a sudden there wasn’t a society full of bigots all around them and both of them were able to explore their sexualities & feelings for each other pretty much without judgement.

I personally look at their relationship as only happening because of those factors — before the crash, I don’t think Tai ever would’ve thought of confessing her feelings for Van. We see her cutting her hair in season one, seemingly getting more comfortable with being a bit more masc (similarly, in season two, after she leaves Simone she stops doing her makeup and starts dressing in progressively more masculine clothing). Essentially we know that when Taissa is out of “public” view & with Van, she stops performing femininity as much. So I feel like her ability to really be with Van was entirely dependent on the perceived safety of their isolated wilderness society. I focus on Taissa in this mostly because Van appears more comfortable with gender expression, as well as with romantically pursuing Taissa, whereas Tai seems to occasionally hesitate. We also know from Ally’s pre-crash comment about Van not being asked to prom that Van was probably either clocked as gay at school or just thought of as unromantic, whereas I think Tai would’ve had a much easier time passing for straight.

And in that way, it’s like a relationship that was formed entirely in the controlled environment of the wilderness. I cannot imagine coming to terms with your sexuality as a teen, going through the entire process of cutting your hair, publicly coming out to all your friends, and experiencing all your queer milestones, only to be rescued and returned to a place where you were still thought of as straight. Like, Tai and Van were sleeping in bed together every night, kissing in public, making little “happy wife, happy life” comments to their friends, and just generally being gay together. And then they would’ve returned to the 1990’s where that kind of queer love would’ve been, at the very least, unusual & surprising. It’s not difficult to imagine this driving them apart. But it is really heartbreaking to imagine the two of them being separated immediately upon being rescued & the realization they must’ve both had that they couldn’t stick together anymore without outing themselves.

#fandom posting #yellowjackets

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TRANS WOMEN: HERE'S SOME SHIT YOUR DOCTOR WONT TELL YOU ABOUT HRT

1. Progesterone: not for everyone, but for many people it may increase sex drive and WILL make your boobs bigger. Also effects mood in ways that many find positive (but some find negative). Most doctors won’t prescribe this to you unless you ask. Most trans girls I know swear by it.

2. Injectible estrogen: is more effective than pill or patch form. Get on it if you can bear needles bc you will see more effects more quickly.

3. Estradiol Cypionate: There is currently a shortage of injectible estradiol valerate. There is no shortage of estradiol cypionate. Functionally they do the same shit.

4. Bicalutamide: This is an anti-androgen that has almost none of the side-effects of spironolactone or finasteride. The girls I know who are on it are evangelical about it.

#queer posting #resources #hrt

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I NEED to know how Van handled Tai marrying Simone. Did Tai call to tell her?? Was she happy for a second to see Taissa's name lighting up her phone? Did she think, just for a second, that Tai actually wanted to speak to her? Actually wanted to see her? Or did Did Shauna tell her, or someone else all together?? Did she read about it in a newspaper?? Does she have a google alert set up for Tai's name?? Did she see it totally by surprise, going about her day, until she read the news and broke down?? No matter the circumstances, it must've caught her off guard how absolutely fucking terrible it made her feel, right? She must've crumpled to pieces in an empty video store, barely managing to flip the sign to 'closed' before she stumbled upstairs and landed in her bed so she could just cry and sleep and cry and sleep for days. Did she get drunk? Did she think about calling Natalie for something stronger? Did she think about crashing the wedding in a suit and objecting? Did she have drunken fantasies of whisking Taissa away to New York City and taking her on a carriage ride through midtown?? Did she almost smile imagining it until reality came crashing back down on top of her?? Is that when she fully cut herself off from the others? Is that when she gave up on getting Tai back? Stopped thinking of her and Tai as 'us' and started thinking of Taissa as something she actually, irrevocably lost? Did she scour the internet for wedding pictures? Did she masochistically beg Shauna to send her updates throughout the entire ceremony? All of Taissa's vows, what she was wearing, what song they danced to? Did she think about running straight into the first forest she could find, into woods deep enough that she couldn't hear the cars on the highway or see the glint of streetlights behind her? To a place where pain made sense and life was simple? Did she wish she could go back to the second floor of that cabin, sleep with Taissa's wrist tied to hers, shivering in the frigid cold of the worst winter she's ever lived through? I NEED TO KNOW. Did anybody come looking for her? Maybe one of the baby gays she took under her wing who noticed the store had been closed for weeks? Did Shauna call her? Or did she just lay there feeling sorry for herself until she realized nothing was going to change? Did she watch as Taissa's first anniversary passed, then her second, then her third. Did she watch Taissa's son make headlines in the backs of local newspapers? Wilderness survivor turned politician welcomes first child with lauded doctor of comparative literature. Did she buy political magazines that interviewed Taissa, rereading brief soundbites about Simone being the love of her life, the reason she gets up in the morning? Did she watch campaign adds with Simone and Taissa smiling into the camera together?? Did it ever stop hurting??? (Obviously it didn't). BUT I NEED TO KNOW.

#yellowjackets #van palmer #fandom posting

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tme/tma believers please refrain from interact.

#intersex posting

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TME and TMA as intersexist terms: as written by an intersex transfem

I’ve had a few different people in my inbox asking me why I view these terms the way I do. In particular, why I claim it’s intersexist. So, I thought I’d lay out a few examples, so everyone can understand where I’m coming from.

Imagine an intersex woman. She was assigned female at birth by her doctors, and was able to go about her childhood as a woman with no inclination that anything was amiss. Sure, she didn’t experience certain parts of puberty, but puberty was different for everyone, right?

But, later in life, she learns she has Turner syndrome. This is an intersex condition where a woman has only one X chromosome, rather than the usual two.

Soon after she learns this, she finds that laws are being made to attempt to keep trans women out of women’s spaces (often specifically sports) which use chromosomes as a defining factor of womanhood.

Would this intersex person be considered “transmisogyny affected”? She has been raised as a cisgender woman with no problems regarding being ‘clocked’, but she is also a direct target of transmisogynistic laws. She lies in a gray area.

Now, let’s go to another intersex person. Imagine an intersex man with PAIS. AIS is an intersex condition where babies are born with testes and XY chromosomes, but their body is immune to or can’t respond to androgens (which includes testosterone). Intersex people with partial AIS (PAIS) often develop a vulva and clitoris during puberty.

This intersex person identifies as a man, and he was assigned male at birth. However, his body does not produce testosterone, and he went through a feminizing puberty. To the average eye, he appears to be a woman now because of this.

Would this intersex person be considered “transmisogyny affected?” He was assigned male at birth, and now appears to be a woman, much like many transfems. However, if many saw how he looks now, stating that he is a male, they would probably clock him as transmasc. He was raised as a boy until puberty, and then faced astrozcization from his peers when he began a puberty that feminized him. What he was facing was a form of intersexism where transmisogyny was playing a huge part. Does his childhood matter? Can one become TME over time, when they were TMA as a child? Again, he lies in a gray area, where the answer is not quite so simple.

What about the “opposite”, per se — an intersex woman who had a masculinizing puberty? She has aromatase deficiency, which means that many ‘male’ hormones (which would usually be converted to ‘female’ hormones) would remain unconverted. She identifies as a woman, and was identified as a female at birth and was raised, until puberty, as a female. But now, she would be clocked as a trans woman upon looking at her. What does that make her? Is it different from the previous example? How and why? This intersex person also lies in a gray area. How she should be described with these terms is not clear.

And keep in mind, these are all relatively simple examples. All of the examples I listed self-identify as cisgender. But there are intersex people who are trans in any direction you can imagine.

If that last example identified as a trans woman, because she is now clocked as one, would you be able to say she’s wrong for that? What about if she identified as transmasculine, because of her experience with puberty? What if she’s multigender, bigender or genderfluid, and says she’s both transmasc and transfem because of her complicated experiences? Would that make her a TMA transmasculine person? But I thought that transmascs were all TME? That’s how it’s so often framed, anyway.

The reason why these questions are so difficult to answer is because these terms were not made with intersex people in mind. Very real intersex transfems were pushed to the wayside in favor of centering the perisex view of transgenderism. Intersex people are nothing but an inconvenient little afterthought, annoying perisex people with their demand for “inclusion” and “consideration”. (As per usual.)

You cannot simply make a new gender binary and say, “No, really, this time everyone fits into these two categories! Forcing people to confine themselves to these two rigid labels which are shown as opposites, and as never interacting, will definitely include everyone this time!!” No matter what the contents of the new binary is, it’s not going to work, because sex and gender alike are too complicated for that. There will always be people in the gray area.

This isn’t even getting into the fact that these terms, for all intents and purposes, seem to have been popularized by and associated with the Baeddelism movement around 2017, which was essentially “Radical Feminism 2: We’re Trans Women, So It’s Fine!” This movement is known for chronic villainization of trans men and non-binary people who aren’t transfem. (They act like this with cis people too, but noticeably less so than they do with non-transfem trans people. How curious.) Think along the lines of how regular radfems treat all men (and who they deem to be men) as inherently morally disgusting scum who deserve to be attacked.

Methinks that maybe these terms aren’t the neutral, fact-based descriptors of oppression that many people nowadays tout them to be, considering that.

So, yeah. “Transmisogyny exempt” and “transmisogyny affected” as terms: not even once. Listen to intersex people, stop trying to make sex and gender into binaries, and for the love of God, stop drinking the queer seperationist koolaid!

#FINALLY SOMEONE. SAID IT IN A WAY I COULD NEVER COMMUNICATE #houhhh been looking for a post like this for ages #important #intersex posting

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Here’s your friendly reminder that AFAB and AMAB are meaningless and obsolete terms!

#important

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Being intersex is not trusting cis people or trans people to be cool. It's not being able to trust anyone. It's seeing trans women and trans men argue over who is more oppressed while pretending we don't exist, while creating terms and forms of discourse that entirely erase us. It's talking to a trans man who is a friend and being told "well you're basically trans anyway" in a way to not learn anything new about us and erase us by absorbing us. It's talking to a trans woman and having her say "trannies like us" to me with no question of what my actual identity was, just an assumption, based on the fact that you all don't think intersex people exist and are real in public in queer spaces. It's telling trans people "actually I'm intersex" and having them get awkward and pull away from me because they don't know how to relate. It's being unsafe in public everywhere and fitting in nowhere. It's being clocked as whatever a person decides they hate the most and being treated that way, and then having my identity erased when trying to reach out to people who can relate. It's being told I'm experiencing misdirected transphobia and that the hate wasn't MEANT for ME, and the only reason I'd be upset is because I was mistaken for trans. It's being driven off of this website by violent graphic descriptions of my murder from terfs paired with trans people telling me I'm transphobic for begging them to pay fucking attention to intersex people. It's having to explain my sex in depth to trans people in order to get anyone to actually understand me, who do not have to do the same with one another. It's having to do Ted talks on your gender to queer people who genuinely don't think we exist. It's being called a sexy Dwarven queen warrior by trans people while describing how exhausting it is living a life where violence is the norm and erasure is mandatory. It's not having a bathroom to go to and having that shrugged off bc I'm not trans anyway. Its having a nonbinary doctor that specializes in HRT deny me a referral to a gender affirming endocrinologist because im not trans and then referring me to someone who spent an hour telling me i dont make sense and must actually be a trans man and i need therapy for my gender. Its being told that any violence I face was meant for someone else therefore not a big deal that it happens to me. It's being told that asking trans people to learn about intersex people is "centering cis issues". It's knowing that I will never fit in anywhere except with the one rare other quite intersex person at the function who is also a trans woman and understands how fucked up it is to be intersex in the queer community, because none of yall care about us in a real way. Because none of yall are fighting back in your own communities against intersexism. Because none of yall will do the real work to understand us or the violence we face every day or how you all only have the surgeries and HRT you do because of the way WE were medically tortured and then effectively erased to the point that our community is shattered and lost and many don't know they're intersex and many have just been told they have a medical issue that needs fixing and not a simple divergence from what is allowed under our current society. But we don't fucking matter to the overwhelming majority of yall. People I've been mutuals with for years who reblog all of my posts on intersexism still reblog or post intersexist shit every single day. I'm tired.

#intersex posting

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happy lesbian week!!

#queer posting

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It's lesbian visibility week and I posted like two years ago a cute vid of me kissing Bambi on tiktok and got dog piled by thousands of bigots calling me a rapist and a monster and a man and telling me to die to the point Bambi was crying about that shit two days ago

And every lesbian visibility graphic that includes other marginalized lesbians has nothing to say about intersex lesbians. Support every kind of lesbian but forget we exist and ignore it when we are choked out of our communities. Erase us and never fucking acknowledge us and enjoy your fucking pride

#queer posting

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Reblog with your score

#3 #my wife has... 59

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As a wheelchair user I'm trying to reframe my language for "being in the way."

"I'm in the way," "I can't fit," and "I can't go there," is becoming "there's not enough space," "the walkway is too narrow," and "that place isn't accessible."

It's a small change, but to me it feels as if I'm redirecting blame from myself to the people that made these places inaccessible in the first place. I don't want people to just think that they're helping me, I want them to think that they're making up for someone else's wrongdoing. I want them to remember every time I've needed help as something someone else caused.

#disability posting

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my friend is very confident and free and i always want to know how she does it so once i asked her and she just said “the only difference between me and you is that when people treat you badly you think it’s because there’s something wrong with you but when people treat me badly i think there’s something wrong with them.” scalped

#mental health posting

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<3

#mental health posting

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Only when your girlish glow, flickers just so, do they let you know: It's hell on earth to be heavenly. Them's the breaks, they don't come gently. Clara Bow - The Tortured Poets Department (2024)

#music posting

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"we learned the right steps to different dances" is such a beautiful way to explain that nobody did anything wrong but it does not work out if you have different goals or different ideals of life, maybe sometimes things don't work out and it is nobodys fault

#music posting