A hiker, clearly shaken, enters a remote English village pub, his clothes all torn and he's full of scratches.
"You won't believe this," he says to the bartender. "I was attacked by a leopard!"
"Really?"
"Yes! A leopard! In England!" The hiker sits down and orders the strongest liquor they've got. "I tried to run, but it was if course much faster than me."
The hiker gets his glass, empties it, and asks for another. "It sent me to the ground with a mighty push from its paws, but weirdly enough it then just gave me a really sad look and left."
"Ah, you met Father Andrews," the bartender says, matter-of-factly.
"What do you mean?" asks the tourist, confused.
"Father Andrews was our priest. A truly kind-hearted man, loved by all. His only goal in life was to serve his congregation as well as he could. So when he one day found a lamp with a genie, his very first wish was to be a loving shepherd to the community."
"That's nice "
"Absolutely, if only he hadn't been so prone to spoonerisms."
Tiffany couldn't quite work out how Miss Level got paid. Certainly the basket she carried filled up more than it emptied. They'd walk past a cottage and a woman would come scurrying out with a fresh-baked loaf or a jar of pickles, even though Miss Level hadn't stopped there. But they'd spend an hour somewhere else, stitching up the leg of a farmer who'd been careless with an axe, and get a cup of tea and a stale biscuit.
It didn't seem fair.
“Oh, it evens out,” said Miss Level, as they walked on through the woods.
“You do what you can. People give what they can, when they can. Old Slapwick there, with the leg, he's as mean as a cat, but there'll be a big cut of beef on my doorstep before the week's end, you can bet on it. His wife will see to it. And pretty soon people will be killing their pigs for the winter, and I'll get more brawn, ham, bacon and sausages turning up than a family could eat in a year.”
“You do? What do you do with all that food?”
“Store it,” said Miss Level.
“But you-”
“I store it in other people. It's amazing what you can store in other people.” Miss Level laughed at Tiffany's expression. “I mean, I take what I don't need round to those who don't have a pig, or who're going through a bad patch, or who don't have anyone to remember them.”
“But that means they'll owe you a favour!”
“Right! And so it just keeps on going round. It all works out.”
“I bet some people are too mean to pay-”
“Not pay,” said Miss Level, severely. “A witch never expects payment and never asks for it and just hopes she never needs to. But, sadly, you are right.”
“And then what happens?"
“What do you mean?”
“You stop helping them, do you?”
“Oh, no,” said Miss Level, genuinely shocked. “You can't not help people just because they're stupid or forgetful or unpleasant. Everyone's poor round here. If I don't help them, who will?”
{ MASTERPOST } Everything You Need to Know about Saving Money and Being Frugal
We’re all in this together. Don’t give up.
On food and groceries:
How to Shop for Groceries like a Boss
Why Name Brand Products Are Beneath You: The Honor and Glory of Buying Generic
If You Don’t Eat Leftovers I Don’t Even Want to Know You
You Are above Bottled Water, You Elegant Land Mermaid
You Should Learn To Cook. Here’s Why.
On entertainment and socializing:
The Frugal Introvert’s Guide to the Weekend
7 Totally Reasonable Ways To Save Money on Cheap Entertainment
Take Pride in Being a Cheap Date
The Library Is a Magical Place and You Should Fucking Go There
Your Library Lets You Stream Audiobooks and eBooks FOR FREEEEEEE!
What’s the Effect of Social Media on Your Finances?
You Won’t Regret Your Frugal 20s
On health:
How to Pay Hospital Bills When You’re Flat Broke
Run With Me if You Want to Save: How Exercising Will Save You Money
Our Master List of 100% Free Mental Health Self-Care Tactics
Why You Probably Don’t Need That Gym Membership
How to Get DIRT CHEAP Pet Medication, Without a Prescription
On other big expenses:
Businesses Will Happily Give You HUGE Discounts if You Ask This Magic Question
Understand the Hidden Costs of Travel and Avoid Them Like the Plague
Other People’s Weddings Don’t Have to Make You Broke
You Deserve Cheap, Fake Jewelry… Just Like Coco Chanel
3 Times I Was Damn Grateful for My Emergency Fund (and Side Income)
When (and How) to Try Refinancing or Consolidating Student Loans
The Real Story of How I Paid Off My Mortgage Early in 4 Years
Season 2, Episode 2: “I’m Not Ready to Buy a House—But How Do I *Get Ready* to Get Ready?”
The Most Impactful Financial Decision I’ve Ever Made… and Why I Don’t Recommend It
On buying secondhand and trading:
Almost Everything Can Be Purchased Secondhand
I Am a Craigslist Samurai and so Can You: How to Sell Used Stuff Online
The Delicate Art of the Friend Trade
On giving gifts and charitable donations:
How Can I Tame My Family’s Crazy Gift-Giving Expectations?
In Defense of Shameless Regifting
Make Sure Your Donations Have the Biggest Impact by Ruthlessly Judging Charities
The Anti-Consumerist Gift Guide: I Have No Gift to Bring, Pa Rum Pa Pum Pum
How to Spot a Charitable Scam
Ask the Bitches: How Do I Say “No” When a Loved One Asks for Money… Again?
On resisting temptation:
How to Insulate Yourself From Advertisements
Making Decisions Under Stress: The Siren Song of Chocolate Cake
The Magically Frugal Power of Patience
6 Proven Tactics for Avoiding Emotional Impulse Spending
On minimalism and buying less:
Don’t Spend Money on Shit You Don’t Like, Fool
Everything I Know About Minimalism I Learned from the Zombie Apocalypse
Slay Your Financial Vampires
The Subscription Box Craze and the Mindlessness of Wasteful Spending
On saving money:
How To Start Small by Saving Small
Not Every Savings Account Is Created Equal
The Unexpected Benefits (and Downsides) of Money Challenges
Budgets Don’t Work for Everyone—Try the Spending Tracker System Instead
From HYSAs to CDs, Here’s How to Level Up Your Financial Savings
Season 2, Episode 10: “Which Is Smarter: Getting a Loan? or Saving up to Pay Cash?”
The Magic of Unclaimed Property: How I Made $1,900 in 10 Minutes by Being a Disorganized Mess
We will periodically update this list with newer articles. And by “periodically” I mean “when we remember that it’s something we forgot to do for four months.”
Bitches Get Riches: setting realistic expectations since 2017!
Start saving right heckin’ now!
If you want to start small with your savings, consider signing up for an Acorns account! They round up your every purchase to the nearest dollar and save and invest the change for you. We like them so much we’ve generously allowed them to sponsor us with this affiliate link:
Are you in the USA? I cannot stress this enough: search your state's unclaimed property site to see if there is anything in your name.
I just got a check for nearly $900 that I didn't know about. Apparently it was sent to me at the end of 2019 and I never got it, so it was sent on to Unclaimed Property.
My friend checked the state he used to live in. He didn't have any unclaimed property of his own. But his dad, who died 20 years ago, had over $10,000 in unclaimed property. My friend is the heir, so he gets that money.
It involves a little paperwork to get the money but it's so worth it!
You can search ALL states using MissingMoney.com. And I recommend that you search ALL states - sometimes you might get a surprise about post property in another state (as my friend did with his dad!)
So, thanks to President Biden’s Infrastructure Bill, remote locations on the Navajo Nation Reservation will be receiving electricity for the first time — ever.
Also, water treatment devices are being developed to help the tribe access clean running water. After decades without.
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