#'i once knew a guy whose ghost was still leaking toxic ectoplasm - who knew right?'

[buildoblivionthenwewilltalk]

the fun thing about my job is it gives me whole new ways of projecting on my best boy klaus - for example, i’ve spent 20 minutes formulating a headcannon that reggie used to take him to funeral homes too and now as an adult he knows a worrying amount about how to prepare, embalm and/or get rid of a body

#i like to imagine they're in some kind of mission/ intel scenario #and they're looking through chemicals and are like 'urgh whats that smell' #and klaus pipes up like 'ah yes the sweet scent of formaldehyde in the morning - did you guys know early embalmers used arsenic' #'and now a whole bunch of civil war cemeteries are active biohazards' #'i once knew a guy whose ghost was still leaking toxic ectoplasm - who knew right?' #idk my dude should know a lot about dead people #like he should be dropping stages of decay and how many orifices you have to plug in the middle of conversations just to freak people out #also interesting way for him to try and get over his fear of the dead as a kid right? #maybe he did try and go down the route of 'if i know it i cant be scared' #but then reggie decided exposure therapy was better and klaus is left still traumatised but with a lot of party ruining trivia #who knew my chosen career path would have a lot of fic potential #tua #the umbrella academy #klaus hargreeves