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ebottcatacombs · 5 years

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Not-Fancy Dates To Take The Boys On

The skelebros’ favorite not-fancy dates. Dedicated to @popatochisssp, whose writing inspired me to make this blog

UT Sans -

Late night shopping cart races. While it’s true he loves a good night’s sleep, he also enjoys staying up late on occasion if some fun times are involved. That being said, he doesn’t care much for fancy restaurants or crowded theme parks, but grocery stores are tame and full of potential entertainment material. Plus, there’s a sort of giddy feeling he gets seeing a place that’s usually full of people so empty. It’s a strange sort of giddy, bordering on fear. Like when you ride a roller coaster.

Ideally, the date consists of pushing each other in carts (he’ll urge you to make the “nyoom” noise when you push him) eating free samples (he brought disguises you can sneak extras) and goofing off in the kid toy section until you get asked to leave. Then he’s content to loiter in the parking lot, staring up at the stars with your hand in his.

UT Papyrus -

Fashion show! Like Sans, Pap’s ideal date happens in a store. However, he prefers unique clothing stores or big bustling malls. They’re so exciting! You better believe he’s bringing a boom box full of fashion-montage beats. You pick outfits for each other to try on and take tons of pictures. Papyrus is full of compliments the whole time, praising how well you wear each outfit and how this one scarf brings out the color of your cheeks when you blush. Compliment him back and he’ll be beaming the rest of the day.

You two usually don’t end up buying anything. If you see something you really like, Papyrus will look for ways to improve the design and you something similar but better (usually covered in flames) because let’s face it, clothes are expensive, and there’s no need to spend all that money when it’s more fun (and usually cheaper) to sew something. After the date, he takes you to get smoothies.

UF Sans -

At first, UF Sans tried to take you to one of those couples pottery classes. He was quick to get annoyed with the teacher, though, and you ended up leaving early. Now craft dates are held in his garage. He tries to mix up what you do, getting clay for sculpting and modgepodge for greeting cards, but when it’s his turn to choose the craft you two end up tinkering with car parts or making something more practical than knick-knacks or post cards. He likes to feel productive, and he likes using his hands.

He won’t ever say it, but he loves when you ask him for help. Not in a creepy way — he respects your independence and loves to see you thrive on your own — but if you ask his expertise on something you’re making it boosts his confidence and makes him feel useful. He loves when he gets to sit behind you and help position your hands the right way, murmuring directions in your ear as he walks you through steps.

UF Papyrus -

While this man definitely appreciates a classy resturant, UF Papyrus can’t resist the allure of a cozy bookshop. The smell of coffee and paper soothes him, and even such a loud guy can appreciate the quiet. The date usually starts with pastries and fancy coffee. He likes to impress you with his super refined coffee taste (you can tell by the look on the barista’s face he orders something simple in a complicated and round-about way) and depending on what you order he’ll make a teasing comment about your sweet tooth. By the third date, he knows your order by heart.

Usually Papyrus will give you time to look around by yourself while he writes in his journal. Or you can sit beside him and read yourself, or write. But he enjoys the quiet moments between you two when you just enjoy each other’s presence.

By far his favorite part of the date is the journey to the romance section. He grabs some classics off the shelf and looooooms close to you, lowering his voice and reading off some of the sweetest words you’ve heard. He is absolutely preening and puffing with pride once he’s got you blushing. Get him back by reciting a love poem to him. Make sure it’s super corny and tooth-rottingly sweet. He will be the blushiest boy.

US Sans -

Gym dates or park dates. Really, any date where you two can burn up some energy. He enjoys roller skating and treadmill dancing, so expect him to show off. Boy can also lift like no one’s business. If you’re not particularly sporty, no worries! He’s happy to lead you in some yoga or just take a walk with you. He also finds pushing you on the swing irresistibly romantic, the nerd.

It’s important to say that while he’ll encourage you on these dates, he’ll never push your limits. If you don’t feel comfortable in a gym that’s fine, and if you can’t keep up with his excessive amount of energy he understands. As far as dates go, he’s super flexible and accommodating. You want a chill picnic? Perfect! He knows the spot. You prefer an arcade over the roller rink? No worries, watch him destroy his high score on Dance Dance Revolution! Overall, his main focus is showing you a good time.

US Papyrus -

You might just be surprised by the amount of energy US Papyrus has on your date. It’s by no means as intense as his brother’s idea of a workout, but he enjoys exploring the outdoors. Impromptu dates happen quite often, as he has a habit of staring out of the window, and if he sees a bird he needs in his journal he’ll ask if you’re up for an adventure. He has an impressive collection of drawings and pressed leaves in his book. Once you come along, he’ll also pick flowers and thread them in your hair.

If you two are going on a planned excursion, you’ll need boots, water, snacks, and a machete. Papyrus doesn’t care to follow paths, so you’ll make plenty of your own. Sometimes you go with a goal in mind (an abandoned fort he heard a rumor about, a certain type of mushroom he’s never seen before) and sometimes you just walk. He’s an excellent conversationalist, and you find talking to him feels easy and natural. You two don’t take any pictures, but Papyrus likes to sketch your adventures. You’re in all of his drawings.

SF Sans -

Given how busy SF Sans is most of the time, he actually prefers simple, easy-going dates. As much as he loves to get dressed up and show you off, taking you to fine art museums and treating you to expensive drinks, homey dates will always be his favorites. He enjoys a good game night with you. Gin rummy, bananagrams, chess. Something stimulating but not tiring (like his job.) You two often break out games and puzzles on the weekends, enjoying a dinner of delivery whatever (veggie pizza is his favorite) and whatever alchohol you can scrounge from the cabinet.

As the night goes on, the games usually turn to things like truth-or-dare and twenty questions. You play ‘never have I ever’ and take shots from those paper mouthwash cups. It’s his favorite part of the week. He gets to unwind with you, and he doesn’t even have to drive anywhere. He doesn’t even have to wear pants! He is honestly so relieved to be out of his royal guard uniform you do not even know. He insists pajamas are necessary for maximum date coziness (plus you look adorable and extra soft.) The date ends with you falling asleep on top of each other.

SF Papyrus -

Blanket fort dates. Look, SF Papyrus is... not fancy. Please don’t make him be fancy. He’s depressed and has little energy, so this is the perfect date for him. Crowds overwhelm him and he already has a tendency to nest, plus you two can fall asleep all cuddled up. He also puts a lot of effort in the blanket fort. Fresh-baked cookies, fairy lights, teddy bears, the works. He makes them functional and beautiful, and you always get to pick the movies. Often times he feels like he should be able to take you on a better date, even if you insist this is more than fine, so he tries to make everything extra perfect to show you he cares and is willing to put work into your relationship.

Papyrus also has an old record player he’ll set up on these dates. Once you two start to wind down for the evening he’ll put on a gentle tune and gather you up in his arm, cuddling you to his chest as he sings. His voice is soft and warm, just a bit scratchy, and you can smell something smoky and sweet on his teeth. He massages your head until you fall asleep.

HT Sans -

At the end of every month the community holds a farmer’s market, and every month Sans takes you on a farmer’s market date. Usually crowds make him nervous, but this is a decidedly tiny meet-up, mostly consisting of people just trying to get by, people trying to continue a family tradition, people just starting out in their passion, that sort of thing. To your surprise, Sans isn’t as reserved as usual the first time he takes you to the market. He cracks jokes, talks to vendors, buys a kid a yarn doll. Deep down, he’s a real people-person who loves to see others smile.

The people at the farmer’s market love you. They coo over what a cute couple you and Sans are. You’re offered a free sample of organic lotion and collect some soup recipes. A little kid introduces you to their teddy bear. One lady tells you about what a joy Sans is, how he always buys something from each of the vendors, encouraging them and giving them hope. They’re so glad the two of you are happy together.

You look forward to the end of every month.

HT Papyrus -

Gardening dates, all the way. On the surface gardening quickly becomes a passion of HT Papyrus. The king and queen used to garden, he tells you, planting golden flowers next to a patch of tulips. And isn’t gardening lovely? It’s an endless circle of food, it looks pretty, and plants are such good listeners. You are also a good listener and very pretty, he tells you. You blush. He puts a hand over yours, helping you pat the soil down nice and snug.

Papyrus has a green thumb, you find out. He’s attentive to the needs of the different types of plants, and is patient while waiting for things to grow. He encourages his plants constantly (“you can do it, I believe in you, you’re the loveliest vine!”) One day you two set up an irrigation system, and between figuring out how much water should go where and how to adjust the system for when it’s time to rotate crops, you two became so very confused. Stumped, you laid in the sun, tossing solutions back and forth. You were growing frustrated, but when you looked to Papyrus he was smiling. When you asked him why, he simply replied he hasn’t been this excited to solve a puzzle in a very, very long time.

You smiled back at him.

#undertale headcanons #ut sans #ut papyrus #uf sans #uf papyrus #us sans #us papyrus #sf sans #sf papyrus #ht sans #ht papyrus #popatochisssp #undertale imagines

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inb4vaughn · 6 years

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Are One Length Irons For You?

Bryson DeChambeau is the game’s biggest one length irons proponent.

Editor’s Note: Now that former U.S. Amateur champion and Top 20 PGA Tour player Bryson DeChambeau has played his way onto the 2018 Ryder Cup team, his well-documented success with Cobra Golf’s one length irons will get plenty of fresh exposure in golf media. That’s why we’ve decided to revisit the following feature from 2017 in which Golf Tips contributor Ken Van Vechten gets fitted for one length irons — and comes away with some interesting conclusions.

With every club company chasing the grail of long, longer, longest, Cobra has veered off on an alternate path toward that end. Though not the first commercial venture to try, the company’s F7 ONE one length irons – in both cast and forged – marks an outside-the-box move for one of the game’s bigger names.

“One length is for any player seeking a simplified way of swinging the golf club,” explains Mike Hearne, custom fitting coordinator for Cobra. “One length offers fewer variables – same ball position, same distance from the ball. By eliminating these variables it allows the golfer to swing in a more consistent posture, which leads to more centered strikes and better mis-hits.”

Cobra took a cue from a common lament – “Why can’t all my irons be like my 7?” – outfitting each KING F7 ONE and KING Forged ONE iron with a 7-iron-length shaft. If this sounds familiar, it’s a set-up strategy that PGA Tour player and former NCAA and U.S. Amateur champion Bryson DeChambeau has employed for a number of years. This strategy led him to several Tour wins in 2018, into serious contention for the FedEx Cup (ultimately won by Justin Rose), and a berth on Ryder Cup Team U.S.A. for 2018.

So, back to my initial trepidation: A 4-iron and a wedge outfitted with a mid-iron shaft: Sure, why not, ain’t nothing bad gonna come of that.

ONE LENGTH IRONS AND YARDAGE SPACING

The obvious head-scratcher is gapping, the sequential yardage spacing as we go from one end of the bag to the other. That was my concern, assuming prior to testing – as is a common perception in the market – I’d have an assem-blage of short longs and long shorts.

DeChambeau checks out his stats.

Distance is the result of a number of factors, working in concert: Shaft length and weight (effectively swing speed), launch angle and spin rates; how the shaft, clubhead and clubface react to the strike; and, so importantly, where the hell we strike the ball on the clubface. All else equal, longer clubs can be moved at a higher rate of speed. What they might not do is produce longer shots. It’s all about how energy is transferred to the ball via the club courtesy of the swing. That is (partially) why a slower-swinging player can hit a 5-wood farther than a standard-lofted driver. Flip it around, and 9-iron with a longer shaft is likely to produce juiced up results.

“I don’t think the advertising is wrong,” says Nick Sherburne, founder of Club Champion, an independent, nationwide network of any-and-all-brands fitting studios, of Cobra’s intent. “One swing plane, one swing, shorter long irons for better control; those are the key selling points. But there are gotchas. There might be gapping issues for some customers, a dual spacing problem on either side [of the mid-irons]. And you have to adapt, there is a learning curve, and for some there won’t be instant success.”

ONE LENGTH IRONS ADJUSTMENT

Cobra acknowledges there could be an adjustment period, and that you can’t ignore the basic tenets of science. But it believes in the formula that a shorter-shafted long-iron struck more consistently – “on the screws,” something most of us do far more often at one end of the bag than the other – by a properly engineered head won’t lead to the ball flight equivalent of a wounded quail. To make sure short irons still behave like they should, Cobra had to tinker to make sure when an 8-iron went down range it did so within reason. (Cobra still has a lineup of F7s and other models in standard progression; this is an option, not a my way/highway mandate.)

After a recent session with Cobra at its SoCal HQ, I’m sold, to a large extent. The testing protocol involves x swings with 5-, 7- and 9-irons – the cast version for me – with the usual fitting-session tweaks of lie angle, shaft and the like, and I hit them alongside my gamers, Callaway Apex CF 16s. I play ProjectX PXi 6.0 (stiff) shafts; the Cobras were outfitted with KBS Tour FLT stiff shafts.

Launch and spin rates varied, but all were within optimal parameters. Sidespin was draw-biased, on par for the two longest clubs in each set but significantly higher with the Cobra 9-iron (as was the launch angle). Dispersion, however, was tighter with the Cobras, due in large measure to flattening, over the course of the fitting process, the lie angle two degrees from standard, eliminating heel-grab. (And that serves as a useful reminder that golf swings, even clubs, are not static, unchanging things. When fitted for my Callaways last year — as outlined in a previous article here — the dispersion was so tight that at times you could put a blanket over my shots. I’ve noticed more leftward misses of late so it is time to re-check my needs relative to lie angle.)

THE ONE LENGTH IRONS: THE NUMBERS

The following data shows peak yardage and ballspeed on the left, and average yardage and ball speed on the right.

The takeaway in all of this is I gain yardage, on average if not every shot, with the same-length Cobras. The most striking result is the consistency, notably with the longest iron.

Loft differential between my 5-iron and the F7 is inconsequential – one degree stronger for the latter. The F7 is also nearly an inch shorter, yet ball speed was up across the board on lower swing speed, and there was far less variability between shots – total yardage and ball speed – best to worst. Callaway has one of the hottest faces in the game, something I see when the planets and I align and I launch a 195-yard 5-iron, but that day, under those testing conditions, the shorter club was giving me a more efficient strike, a fact that also was born out by the impact marks on the clubfaces, as well.

At the other extreme, the 7-iron-shafted 9-iron, despite higher absolute and average ball speed, didn’t produce PED-like yardages.

“Head shapes and lofts are identical, in ONE length vs. variable length,” Hearne explains. “The big difference is the headweight and the CG [center of gravity]/inertia properties of the heads. We add weight to the lower-number irons, to increase ball speed, and they have a lower CG and higher inertia in ONE length. Then we do the opposite in the higher-number irons, taking weight out and raising the CG.”

On the mental side of things, I don’t put a ton of thought into the processes that occur between pulling a club and figuring out if I was goat or GOAT with that specific shot. Good or bad, that’s me. I’m not so fidgety that looking down and seeing a long iron sitting rather near the middle of my stance is going to throw me off, so I didn’t feel adjustment angst. I have friends who in that situation would reach for the Zoloft.

None of this is end-all science or a statistically significant data set applicable to the general populace, and it certainly isn’t religious doctrine cast down from on high; it’s one avid recreational player’s experience. I found setting up across the three same-length clubs to be automatic, refreshingly uniform. However, it wasn’t exactly a burden setting up to my clubs. Your mileage may vary. If I had to choose a side, why not have a single stance and posture if you are getting the results you need? And that, ultimately, is proven over time, in the course of play.

It’s golf, it’s personal – one size does not fit all. But ONE will fit some just fine.

www.cobragolf.com

This story was updated on September 26, 2018

The post Are One Length Irons For You? appeared first on Golf Tips Magazine.

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#Golf Tips Magazine #golf irons #golfing tips #golf irons play

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inb4vaughn · 7 years

Text

Are One Length Irons For You?

Bryson DeChambeau is the game’s biggest one length irons proponent.

A 4-iron and a wedge outfitted with a mid-iron shaft: Sure, why not, ain’t nothing bad gonna come of that.

ONE LENGTH IRONS AND YARDAGE SPACING

DeChambeau checks out his stats.

ONE LENGTH IRONS ADJUSTMENT

THE ONE LENGTH IRONS: THE NUMBERS

The following data shows peak yardage and ballspeed on the left, and average yardage and ball speed on the right.

The takeaway in all of this is I gain yardage, on average if not every shot, with the same-length Cobras. The most striking result is the consistency, notably with the longest iron.

At the other extreme, the 7-iron-shafted 9-iron, despite higher absolute and average ball speed, didn’t produce PED-like yardages.

“Head shapes and lofts are identical, in ONE length vs. variable length,” Hearne explains. “The big difference

is the headweight and the CG [center of gravity]/inertia properties of the heads. We add weight to the lower-number irons, to increase ball speed, and they have a lower CG and higher inertia in ONE length. Then we do the opposite in the higher-number irons, taking weight out and raising the CG.”

It’s golf, it’s personal – one size does not fit all. But ONE will fit some just fine.

www.cobragolf.com

The post Are One Length Irons For You? appeared first on Golf Tips Magazine.

from Golf Tips Magazine http://ift.tt/2kpFah8

#Golf Tips Magazine #golf irons #golfing tips #golf irons play

0 notes