Tumgik
#(also yes they both insist they havent been taking it easy on me lol)
stepfordgoth · 1 year
Text
I think one of the reasons I slay so much penis at chess is that it utilizes my greatest strength of overthinking! One of the few things in life where my brain being several steps ahead at all times is a good thing!
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astralgloss · 6 years
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im a curious meanie so 1-134 muhahaha you get to relive the hell i just went through
etab i haTE U
1: Name
my name is marit lol but please just keep it mar
2: Age
i am 17 but i’ll b 18 in 2 months!!!!
3: 3 Fears
the dark, complete and utter loneliness, and clowns
4: 3 things I love
books, forest fruit tea, the sound of rain
5: 4 turns on
a nice smile that reaches the eyes, a nice smell, having a dog ngl, a soft touch
6: 4 turns off
extreme arrogance, insisting to pay for my meal if i want to pay bc its “what a man should do”, forcing lifestyles on me, not caring about my interests
7: My best friend
she does have tumblr but idk it but hey demi if u ever see this ur the bomb.com
8: Sexual orientation
im bi fam
9: My best first date
my bf and i went to amsterdam to go shopping and he followed me everywhere (even the bookshop even though he hates books) and idk i just love him it was a nice day
10: How tall am I
im 1,65m or 5′4″ but i can and will kick ur ass
11: What do I miss
nothing really??
12: What time was I born
ok so i asked my mom and she said i was born on a tuesday at exactly 12pm but i bet she’s lying
13: Favorite color
yellow!! im basic!!
14: Do I have a crush
well i sure hope so @ boyfriend
15: Favorite quote
to the stars who listen, and the dreams that are answered
16: Favorite place
my bf’s house tbh, specifically his bed
17: Favorite food
pizza, specifically the hot chicken one from ny pizza
18: Do I use sarcasm
nah fam (ofc i do im a little shit)
19: What am I listening to right now
god is a woman by ariana grande
20: First thing I notice in new person
how they look at other people when those people don’t notice it
21: Shoe size
38/39 idk the other size lol sorry 
22: Eye color
its blue but it changes with my mood (oh my god im so sorry im kidding please don’t hate me)
23: Hair color
im a blondie
24: Favorite style of clothing
sth casual but also a bit towards the punkish style, but i also rlly love looking tiny and soft and cute lol
25: Ever done a prank call?
ok so there’s this hotline for kids who have troubles with their parents and families but it was a shit hotline tbh so once i called it up with my friends pretending i was crying and the man on the phone asked me what was wrong so i told him that all my friends had fire type pokemon and i only had grass type pokemon and they kept beating me and i didnt know what to do and then man was so confused it was funny af
27: Meaning behind my URL
idk man i wanted a name that could b easy to remember and i was inspired by ridgeport tbh
28: Favorite movie
the perks of being a wallflower
29: Favorite song
Fav song atm is anything from p!atd's newest album and my fav song of all time is probably train of consequences by megadeth
30: Favorite band
megadeth lol
31: How I feel right now
pretty good but also annoyed bc i have to go to work in half an hour :(
32: Someone I love
my bf
33: My current relationship status
if u guys havent noticed by now im taken
34: My relationship with my parents
p ok
35: Favorite holiday
halloween/christmas
36: Tattoos and piercing i have
I have my ears pierced and thats it lol
37: Tattoos and piercing i want
i rlly want a few bookish related tattoos, like a tiny raven, a little lightning bolt, and the city of velaris and then i also rlly want a sleeve tbh but imma be a teacher and idk if i can :/ about piercings: i rlly want a helix or tragus and maybe get second holes in my hearlobes
38: The reason I joined Tumblr
ok so ive been on tumblr for about 5 years and initially it was bc i was Depressed™ and then about a year ago i found out about simblr and i was hooked
39: Do I and my last ex hate each other?
tbh i dont even talk to him anymore i dont rlly care about him in any way
40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?
yes bih
41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted?
hes my bf so yea lol
42: When did I last hold hands?
wednesday
43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?
about 45 minutes bc im lazy and i keep getting distracted
44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days?
nope
45: Where am I right now?
in bed lol
46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me?
either my bf or my best friend
47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level?
depends on where i am
48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad?
mom
49: Am I excited for anything?
tbh moving out but thats gonna take a few more years
50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to?
*insert bf here*
51: How often do I wear a fake smile?
every time im at work lol
52: When was the last time I hugged someone?
wednesday
53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me?
lol bye
54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not?
nope
55: What is something I disliked about today?
the fact that i have to work a day shift instead of an evening shift
56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?
my internet friends tbh it’d be cool to meet all the people from my bookish discord or from @booptherat​‘s discord
57: What do I think about most?
what book i should read next
58: What’s my strangest talent?
i can finish a book in about 4 hours
59: Do I have any strange phobias?
not rlly? i hate the whole asmr thing tho ew
60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?
behind lol
61: What was the last lie I told?
i dont remember tbh
62: Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?
neither lol
63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens?
look im not saying that believing that we’re the only living species in the entire universe is narcissistic, but it is. also dont fuck with ghosts
64: Do I believe in magic?
hell yes
65: Do I believe in luck?
hell yes
66: What’s the weather like right now?
idk probably cloudy and windy
67: What was the last book I’ve read?
fahrenheit 451 by ray bradbury 
68: Do I like the smell of gasoline?
nah not rlly
69: Do I have any nicknames?
i guess mar?
70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had?
when i was 2 i fell from sth and slammed the corner of my eye onto the corner of a table and i couldve been blind but thank god im not
71: Do I spend money or save it?
both 
72: Can I touch my nose with a tongue?
yup
73: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me?
post it notes
74: Favorite animal?
doggg
75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM?
reading lol
76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is?
idk man
77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it?
i gotta feeling by the black eyed peas lol
78: How can you win my heart?
give me a samoyed and a 1000 books
79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone?
“a boss ass bitch”
80: What is my favorite word?
fuck?
81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr
@cubersims​ @imvikai​ @ridgeport​ @cowplant-pizza​ @bloomlet​ @tiptoptab​
82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say?
spend fiddies, pet kitties, hold tiddies
83: Do I have any relatives in jail?
not that i know of lol
84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power?
the power to choose whatever power i want at any moment
85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on?
“do you like working here?”
86: What is my current desktop picture?
its an august background from @emmastudies​
87: Had sex?
yes
88: Bought condoms?
no
89: Gotten pregnant?
no
90: Failed a class?
yes
91: Kissed a boy?
yup, i’ve been kissing my bf for about 2,5 years now lol
92: Kissed a girl?
yup, i’m living the bisexual dream lol
93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain?
yes
94: Had job?
yes, im working at a movie theater right now!!
95: Left the house without my wallet?
tbh all the time now that i can pay with my phone
96: Bullied someone on the internet?
yea i used to but that was when i was 12 and i’d like to say that i’ve grown a lot in the past 5 years
97: Had sex in public?
nope
98: Played on a sports team?
yes
99: Smoked weed?
nope, even though i live like 20 minutes away from amsterdam lol
100: Did drugs?
nope
101: Smoked cigarettes?
nope
102: Drank alcohol?
yupppp, i love me some raspberry cider
103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan?
nope
104: Been overweight?
nope
105: Been underweight?
nope
106: Been to a wedding?
yup
107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight?
lol all the time tbh
108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight?
yup
109: Been outside my home country?
yup, however never outside of europe tho
110: Gotten my heart broken?
a few times
111: Been to a professional sports game?
yess, i saw the dutch female volleyball team once!
112: Broken a bone?
nope
113: Cut myself?
yes
114: Been to prom?
we dont do prom in the netherlands lol
115: Been in airplane?
yes
116: Fly by helicopter?
nope
117: What concerts have I been to?
k3 (only dutchies and belgians remember this), one direction, megadeth, and ed sheeran
118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex?
yupp
119: Learned another language?
i mean im from the netherlands and im fluent in english thanks to myself
120: Wore make up?
yuppp
121: Lost my virginity before I was 18?
yes
122: Had oral sex?
lol yes
123: Dyed my hair?
nope
124: Voted in a presidential election?
not old enough to vote :(
125: Rode in an ambulance?
nope
126: Had a surgery?
nope
127: Met someone famous?
nope
128: Stalked someone on a social network?
nope
129: Peed outside?
a few times lol
130: Been fishing?
nope
131: Helped with charity?
yep
132: Been rejected by a crush?
a few times
133: Broken a mirror?
lol yes
134: What do I want for birthday?
some books, money, cake, more books, makeup
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ua-monoma · 6 years
Text
[[ hi here’s a text convo me and dani were having during the iimono text convo woohoo feelings ]]
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:16 AM
iida's definition of alright is "im not completely hurting to the point where it is hard to do or think abt anything else"
rickyLast Sunday at 4:17 AM
THATS A BAD DEFINITION IIDA
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:17 AM
if he can do his duties without being hindered he's "alright"
rickyLast Sunday at 4:18 AM
like tbh monoma's big feels rn are like 
 1) i wanna communicate but it feels like iida doesnt actually communicate with me ever 
2) i wanna be honest but it feels like iida isnt being honest with me 
3) i've been opening up a lot which im! proud of!! i can face my emotions now! but iida isnt facing HIS emotions with me and i thought uHh being a couple means we do that together so i guess i'll go fuck myselfsdfskhdgbg
but ALSO from an outside perspective iida Does Communicate and Is Honest... way more than monoma perceives it but monoma sucks. at being able to identify it
A L S O he cant stand iida taking care of him so much sfhgbsfbhsg hes starting to feel rly coddled and he Does Not Like It
and thats largely just cuz hes so unstable and feels guilty about it now that hes more aware of it and wants to either just shut down and stop emoting around iida or, like, he wants to get to take care of iida if/when he ever breaks down cuz then it'll be Equals
kdfgdfhbdfgs i just had a hunch and it was right, monoma is actually older than iida sdfbjhgs
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:22 AM
WAIT HE IS
HES OLDER,
rickyLast Sunday at 4:27 AM
but yeah i think the other thing is that monoma wants stuff from iida but like has not been able to rly voice it (i feel like this is the first time he has ever talked like This Much about emotional bullshit) but also TBH he feels brushed aside every time iida gives him one of his lil speeches
cuz he doesnt respond very well to positivity and also will just latch onto the negative aspects
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:30 AM
WOW then u have iida whos just like "dude im not a fuckign mind reader tell me what u want"
rickyLast Sunday at 4:30 AM
WHICH I KNOW BUT HE'S WORKING ON IT.....
iida: communicate pls monoma: ok heres a big rambling post about stuff i feel iida: ok thats nice. can you communicate with me pls tho monoma: I JUST DID HSDFKGGBDFSG I'LL JUST GO FUCK MYSELF THEN I GUESS--
^ is how he feels
also hes scared of the Boyfriend Conversation
which i think i've told you before, hes scared cuz of the sex addiction thing but also,
ppl keep coercing him to sex and he doesnt wanna date iida and then be coerced into Officially Cheating,,, pseudo cheating isnt acceptable either but at least like,,, hes Technically not betraying him,
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:36 AM
THE RAMBLING THING isnt clear to iida bc its like yes that is how he feels but he is not telling me What He Wants From Me
rickyLast Sunday at 4:37 AM
YEAH thats what i noticed today +_+!!!
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:38 AM
its like monoma is offering his stance but not a solution or a compromise
rickyLast Sunday at 4:38 AM
monoma doesnt rly know that's what he's supposed to do hjbsjfsg
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:38 AM
does iida have to spell it out
rickyLast Sunday at 4:38 AM
y es
like, the last thing iida said kind of made monoma be like
wait lemme look at it again
ok he said he wanted to know the reasons behind his actions and monoma was like,,,,wha--
cuz... 1) theres like never actually a reason and 2) he didnt know iida wanted that from him
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:40 AM
H
rickyLast Sunday at 4:40 AM
like monoma barely even recognizes half his actions cuz theyre all based on impulses and tbh if nobody pointed them out he'll just move on like nothing's happened
like he compartmentalizes,,, s o much,,,,,, and then represses it like instantly like TBH
like barely anyone talks about monoma's growing alcoholism so he just keeps doing that, and no one has had the chance to tell him to stop communicating with villains so he kept doing that too but like. Because it wasnt pointed out he barely has a problem with it and can function fine
everyone harps on him for the sex stuff tho so he's just like Drowning In Guilt
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:44 AM
is there literally-- any way iida can actually help him because, i just , wow
rickyLast Sunday at 4:44 AM
sfjgkdfg 
iida: here's a list of questions to communicate with, pls answer monoma: dissociates instantly 
whOH YEAH DEFINITELYi know that sounds all depressing sjhsdfghthe fix is honestly super easy tbh
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:45 AM
HE ASKED TWO WHOLE QUESTIO-jvhcfdjsjcxsdjhds
god im glad there is indeed a fix
rickyLast Sunday at 4:45 AM
I WAS TYPING UP MORE META I HAVENT GOTTEN TO IT YET
monoma's problem is literally just that he doesnt have the vocabulary for, like, anything
what he wants is an open relationship but he doesnt know what that is and TO BE QUITE FRANK his only knowledge of one is fucking sen and kosei
so like, he's only hesitating so much cuz he doesnt know how to voice what he wants cuz Tbh monoma hates not sounding smart and being emotive means bumbling around like an idiot
he still feels brushed off tho,
iida bls be sad around him more
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:02 AM
IIDA DOESNT LIKE BEING SAD
its weird for him
he always like
how do i put this
he takes his sadness, pisses on it, and sets it on fire
rickyLast Sunday at 5:02 AM
oh God i just realized iida is doing the same thing the guy i was gay for did FUCKMeJFBJHFBGDG
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:03 AM
oh he pissed on his  sadness too? worm
rickyLast Sunday at 5:03 AM
he did the 'im alright is actually crashing and burning in super slow motion for months at a time' thing
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:03 AM
iida is hollow more often than he is sad
1JDCKCDSNHSDSNDSCJ
rickyLast Sunday at 5:05 AM
meanwhile i had the loudly has breakdowns and then gets upset about being taken care of despite him insisting because of his Fetish for taking care of people thing
me: glares at iidas Fetish
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:06 AM
ok this is more of a hc but
iida likes taking care of ppl bc his parents rarely took care of him uwus
o hes like
rickyLast Sunday at 5:07 AM
CRIES
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:07 AM
being the Dad and Mom he never had
rickyLast Sunday at 5:07 AM
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
see that Sucks cuz my hc is that monoma was raised to be as self sufficient as possible as Fast as possible which meant wow we aint got time for emotions fam just Put Them In A Box
oh is the box overflowing, put the BOX in a BIGGER BOX
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:08 AM
emotionally stunted boys sure are great
rickyLast Sunday at 5:08 AM
i k r
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:08 AM
only in theory tho,
rickyLast Sunday at 5:08 AM
LOL
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:08 AM
irl i wouldve just
choked them
rickyLast Sunday at 5:09 AM
sobs angrily about iida
share your emotions biiiiiiitchhhh
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:09 AM
hits the back of monoma's head
rickyLast Sunday at 5:09 AM
hEY
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:09 AM
just tell him what u want u stupid fuckJCDFJDSSD
rickyLast Sunday at 5:09 AM
HE WANTS YOU TO SHARE HIS EMOTIONS HSFBGJHFGS HE SAID THAT!!!!AND IIDA WAS LIKE, NAH
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:10 AM
IIDA ISNT RLLY THAT SURE OF HIS EMOTIONS EITHER THATS WHY!!!
HE THINKS HES THIS BUT HES ACTUALLY SOMETHING ELSE
rickyLast Sunday at 5:10 AM
THATS MONOMAS PROBLEM TOO YOU BUTT DFHBSDFGJGSG
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:10 AM
FUCK
rickyLast Sunday at 5:11 AM
OHMY
GODSTRANGLES THEM BOTH
IIMONO: FEELINGS?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!???????
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:11 AM
w iida its more like. he knows deep down but he doesnt , think , its important enough , to be addressed
rickyLast Sunday at 5:11 AM
i i d a b l s
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:11 AM
"as class rep i must be a leader before anything else!!!!!"
rickyLast Sunday at 5:12 AM
monoma is honestly like 'iida help this is the very first time in my life i have felt Guilt what am i supposed to do with this!!!!!!
iida: whats wrong monoma: IM SAD????  WHY DIDNT ANYONE EVER TELL ME WHAT A CONSEQUENCE WAS iida: ,
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:14 AM
JXVCDJXCDSAHJSDSDJ
rickyLast Sunday at 5:15 AM
and t b h he kind of is like, automatically expecting like... a Reward for getting this far but iida just kind of keeps being like 'okay cool. and what else'
and monoma is like HJSFBKHBFGS THAT TOOK ME 3 WEEKS TO FIGURE OUT B L S
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:28 AM
fuckcdncnddxjsn
rickyLast Sunday at 5:28 AM
,,,, in person or continue the text
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:29 AM
CCCCONTINUE...they rarely text god pls
rickyLast Sunday at 5:30 AM
TBH YEAH...
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:30 AM
iida has no Time for his phone he needs to read 30 chapters ahead so he doesnt fall behind!!!
rickyLast Sunday at 5:30 AM
monoma is Traumatized by all their other text convos so he doesnt--
im including the times when i post this btw because God Damn i love that its likefucking 5am over here
小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:31 AM
GO TO BED?
rickyLast Sunday at 5:31 AM
this is 500% a 'im sad texting my bitchass pseudo bae about my feelings at fucking sunrise after they kept me up crying all night' conversation
whats a bed
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