#(reading the documentation for tippy tooltips tonight so that i can sleep on it n try to implement it tmrw or something)

[hua-fei-hua]

*flopped down on a couch w/a glass bottle of apple juice to make it look like i'm drinking beer*

yeah... yeah i'm fine.... just coming to terms w/the fact that i must use javascript in order to achieve my vision w/the neocities...

#the main reason i haven't just abandoned this particular aspect of the Vision(tm) is bc it would be useful for like. #more than one thing. so it's like. le sigh. #(reading the documentation for tippy tooltips tonight so that i can sleep on it n try to implement it tmrw or something) #why is it always js.... please god spare me at least a Little bit of suffering here i'll never sin again etc etc #speaking of sin i've started speaking more candidly abt my queerness w/the kids at work this week #it's nice to talk to the older kids (as in fifth grade or older) bc even tho like. nine years old is when they start to be tolerable #they lack awareness n life experience. today i told the older kids that i like men but in a gay way #n one of them was like 'i don't get it' n then i reminded her of Gender:tm: n she was like 'ohhhh i get it' #n the two guys also listening were like 'what. i still don't get it.' ONE OF THEM ASKED ME IF I WAS AMAB ACTUALLY LOL #n i was like 'what? that's not important.' but that was really surprising! kids usually read me as female #so it was kind of flattering in a way to be asked 'were you born a boy?' like idk how he's trying to process my gender #but i'm going to flatter myself into thinking the question comes from him like. idk clocking some kind of innate masculinity or w/e idk #花話 #anyway it's Crazy that it took me almost a year to not feel like i'd get instantly fired for telling kids i'm queer #Not going to lie it really felt like i'd never get to this point but it really is kinda just once you start it gets easier #(though to be fair i also wouldn't have told Any of the kids Anything had one of them not started acting like 'gays' was a dirty word) #(n i just Looked at him n said 'you know i'm a queer right?' n he was like 'O_O') #when i worked at homophobic summer camp i do remember daydreaming abt telling my boss i was a 'flaming queer' #i'd have put my feet up on her desk n everything as i made direct eye contact w/her but ofc i never did anything like that. #anyway! i will slep now so that i can get back to work on my projects tmrw morning