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anathtsurugi · 5 years

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The Colder the Winter, the Warmer the Spring - A Kalluzeb Fic (Chapter 18)

Words: 218,296 (And we finally get a proper fight between Thrawn and Kallus!)

Chapters: 18/25

Rating: E

Relationship(s): Garazeb Orrelios/Alexsandr Kallus (Kanan Jarrus/Hera Syndulla, Rex/Ahsoka Tano)

Summary:

With that, the image widened and Zeb could see that Kallus was holding something in his arms, and as the Lasat inspected the image, he gradually began to realize that it was a baby – a Lasat kit.

“Zeb…help me.”

“Oh, karabast.”

Excerpt:

Kallus snarled as he met the admiral's latest blow, a vicious sound that would've done his lover proud. For several minutes, they moved back and forth across the command center, each traded blow more furious than the last.

"If you think- you have anything that will convince me to betray them...you are delusional," Kallus snapped at him, blocking a quick succession of blows from his adversary. Physically, Thrawn was unquestionably stronger than he was, but he had just that little bit more experience in practical staff fighting that had made the fight even thus far.

Thrawn shook his head as he avoided an attempted stab from the double agent. "And if I were a crueler being, I might actually have to laugh at your ignorance. What you do not know about this scene you and I currently act would fill many of these databanks."

Seething in frustration, the ex-Imperial (stars, but it felt good just to be able to even think it) bit out, "You talk too much!"

For several tense moments, they traded blow for blow and block for block, until Thrawn got in just a hairsbreadth faster beneath one of Kallus' blows, delivering a painful electric current throughout his body.

The ex-Imperial cried out in pain, but his jerked reflex allowed him to deliver a hit to the Chiss' forehead, giving him the chance to roll away from his opponent unseen and duck behind one of the computer banks, collapsing his bo-rifle in the process.

"Kallus!" Thrawn called out in a brief flicker of annoyance.

As he listened to the grand admiral search for him, Kallus took stock of his injuries. While the shock had largely dulled the pain in his left side, the loss of feeling would also cost him the proper use of his left arm. He couldn't keep this up forever. Maybe he could find a way to slip out of the control center unnoticed?

"You cannot hide forever, Kallus," Thrawn warned him.

Part of the ex-agent wanted to laugh in response. Did Thrawn truly believe he could be baited so easily? He was getting out of here right n-

"I wonder what your- Lasat companion would think of you now. Hiding like a coward."

Zeb? Why would Thrawn bring him up now? What gave him the right to even speak of him?

"Although...I rather suppose Captain Garazeb Orrelios has lost any sense of his people's pride or honor, living as an insurgent."

Kallus tensed in a sudden flare of anger at the Chiss' words.

Don't listen. Don't listen to him.

"Perhaps that is why the pair of you make such a well-suited couple. No honor. Tell me, Kallus, what does a Lasat with no honor taste of?" Thrawn's words pierced his ears like precision laser darts.

It took every last ounce of Kallus' considerable restraint not to gasp aloud in shock. He knew. Those words could mean only one thing. He knew! How could he know? How?!

"Are you surprised I know?" Thrawn's eerily soft voice came to him. "You shouldn't be. You haven't exactly been subtle. I have seen the look in your eyes...after he has kissed you."

Kallus felt his stomach lurch with abject terror. If he knew this, what else could he know?

"Your fellow humans would think it perverse. Is that what turned you from us, Agent Kallus? The idea of such a very illicit dalliance? You may speak of it to me, after all. Tell me, has he had you on your back yet?"

It's not like that! It's not! How dare you? How dare you dishonor my love so shamefully?!

Kallus, you mustn't listen!

"Or perhaps you were merely chasing a fantasy? Did you believe that a kiss from a Lasat could erase your sins against them? That you could wipe out your past? Did you believe you could be forgiven?"

Stop it. Stop it! Stop it!

You have to get out. GET OUT NOW!

"The truth is, Kallus...that there is no forgiveness for men like us. But a warrior does not seek to be forgiven. Only to do what is necessary. Although...I am quite certain you will feel it necessary to beg for forgiveness for what happens to your Zeb."

Oh, stars.

"That's right," Thrawn's voice slithered into his brain like some venomous living creature, sinking its fangs into the grey matter and pumping the horror of those words into every cell like poison. "Your lover is mine. Garazeb, son of Orrelios is in my hands now. To spare or to condemn as I see fit. By extension, his life is in your hands. How long will you keep your silence?"

No.

Please...please...just go...get out. You can't help him like this.

He was gripping his bo-rifle in painfully tight fingers, clutching so hard he likely would've been rending the metal had he been anything other than human. Looking down at the weapon, he saw tiny droplets of water splashed along its casing. Fingers trembling, he brought them up to wipe at the tracks he now felt on his face.

Crying? He was...crying?

Rever falna bogtyl. Rever falna bogtyl!

Please...please don't make me do this. You cannot make me choose! Not this! Anything but this!

"How long, Alexsandr Kallus? How long will you endure his suffering and know you have the power to stop it? How long will you listen to your love cry out? Scream your name? Beg for death? If you cannot be persuaded to surrender the location of your precious rebel base, then perhaps he can be-"

"NOOOO!"

The scream that tore from Kallus' throat as he leapt from his hiding place was a sound less than human. He took a shot at the Chiss as he sprang at him, but Thrawn was easily able to avoid it. The smile that moved across the grand admiral's face as he redeployed his bo-rifle to engage him could only be described as victorious.

He would wipe that smile clean away.

Chapter 18: Daddy, Can You Hear the Devil Drawing Near

#Kalluzeb #SWR #Accidental Baby Acquisition #fan fiction #New Chapter #Okay so I didn't get it done before the weekend was over but still #pretty close

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