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brrrkdslek · 8 months

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part 1—ledge

"hello?" mingi asked loudly as he held his phone against his ear, the chattering of his friends in the background making it hard gor him to hear. "yes, this is him. who is this?" his friends slowly shifted their attention to mingi upon seeing his smile drop. "mingi, what is it-" suddenly, he stood up. "what did you say?" he stood frozen for a few seconds before hanging up. mingi grabbed his bag and dashed out of the restaurant, confusing his friends.

his heart was beating hard and loud, the guilt weighing hard on his shoulders, his body feeling heavier with each step he took. he should've gone, he should've been there for you, but he wasn't. because of his new friends that he had so much fun with, all while you cried and suffered alone.

mingi's vision became blurry as tears filled his eyes. it's not that he didn't want to see you, no he would never, but he just wanted to spend more time with his newfound friends, friends that he never had except for you. he was too greedy and asked for too much, when all he needed was right in front of his eyes, seeing him and smiling at him everyday.

mingi was all sweaty and panting upon reaching the hospital, making a beeline towards your hospital room. the overwhelming guilt engulfing his with each nearing step towards your hospital room. the white walls of the corridor suddenly felt suffocating, mingi bit his lip anxiously as his hand hovered over the doorknob.

he felt his breath stop when he opened the door to see you thrashing in the arms of multiple nurses. "no, get off me! let me die, just let me die already!" you cried and pushed, just like a child would. his body moved instinctively as he watched the doctor take out a sedative needle.

"no!" he shoved past the nurses and held your head against his chest, you stopped your movements and trembled in his arms. the nurses and doctor shared a look before leaving the room, allowing the two to some privacy.

mingi buried his face into your head, "i'm sorry, i'm so sorry. i-i was selfish and i just," he chokes on a sob, "i neglected you and i'm sorry..." he kissed your head, "i'm so sorry, my love." you pulled your head out of his chest and looked up at the male with wet eyes, "that's all i ever needed to hear, mingi."

mingi always hated it, he hated how easily you could dismiss his wrongs no matter how big they were just because he said a simple 'sorry'. you were this selfless person that he had taken advantage of for so many years now, and he's only realising now how important you are to him, only now after you tried to kill yourself.

mingi felt ashamed, ashamed for not seeing himself, for not seeing you. he was so sure you'd stay no matter the circumstances and he was right, but it didn't mean that you don't have feelings. all those years of hurt and suffering you experienced disappeared with just one simple apology from him, that was how much he had meant to you.

mingi couldn't bring himself to look into your eyes, the guilt weighing heavy on his heart. he sinks to his knees on the ground, head buried into your folded lap, your hands doing god's work on his fluffy head of hair. you never held grudged against mingi and he knew that. he was foolish, but you even more.

after so many years of coming and going by mingi, you still kept your bright smile and excitement every time you saw him, you were a fool, a fool in love. hearing his empty apologies all those years made you happy, because it was from him.

mingi sobbed into your lap, hands gripping your thighs tightly, as if you'd leave him then, which you could. you brushed through his hair and smiled gently, blinking tiredly. "mingi-ya," the man looks up at the mention of his name, "i'm tired," you pause, "so tired... so please, if you don't care, then go." your words felt like knives stabbing through mingi's chest, but your eyes screamed for him to deny it, for him to confess his undying love to you and be yours forever.

"no, no! i-i won't leave," mingi rises from his position, feeling his blood flow back into his legs, "i'll change, i promise! i love you, i do!" you bit your lip as more tears left your eyes, "do you really?" you looked down, "or do you just like the way i follow you around?" he stiffens, "like your puppy that's always excited to see you no matter what, like i'm only your entertainment."

you look up into mingi's wide eyes, his chest rising and falling heavily. "i-i," he takes your hands in his, "i do, and i'll prove it to you." holding your cheeks gently, he captures your lips in a slow and loving kiss, hands going around your waist to pull you up. as he pulled away, your noses were still inches apart. you look up into his eyes, "i..."

"love you too."

"don't love you."

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casuallivi · 1 year

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I posted 1,895 times in 2022

That's 1,792 more posts than 2021!

135 posts created (7%)

1,760 posts reblogged (93%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@nikethestatue

@fawnandshadows

@thefangirlofhp

@sydneymack

@impossiblescissorspeachpaper

I tagged 1,461 of my posts in 2022

Only 23% of my posts had no tags

#elain archeron - 188 posts

#elriel - 137 posts

#elriel fanfic - 130 posts

#elrielmonth22 - 117 posts

#azriel - 63 posts

#elriel fanart - 59 posts

#elriel month 22 - 45 posts

#lol - 44 posts

#elain x azriel - 32 posts

#my writing - 27 posts

Longest Tag: 124 characters

#🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀😀😀😀

My Top Posts in 2022:

Remember when back in ACOMAF Feyre thought Azriel was the safest to strike a conversation with, even if he probably wasn’t??! (reminds you of another archeron?😏)

Yet, Azriel didn’t answer her, silently urging Cassian to talk about it.

Rhys and Cassian go on telling Feyre the story of how they’ve met, but Az is silent, tense, entering in a loop caused by the mention of his past, illyria, even Mor is worried with his frozen state.

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150 notes - Posted April 10, 2022

Them: Azriel needs a chalenge! A fucking-strong-extrovert-warrior to teach his ass to be better!

Azriel: *crushing on Mor but perfectly content in letting golden-retriever-Cass entertain her loud-and-sexy-blond-ass for 500+ years*

Azriel: *takes four centuries to go clubbing with her*

Azriel: *meets lovely friendly flower girl*

Azriel: I like this one

Azriel: *glues his ass to hers for the next three years*

Everyone: 👁️👄👁️

Azriel: what?

155 notes - Posted May 23, 2022

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156 notes - Posted May 22, 2022

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206 notes - Posted April 5, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Rhys: agrees to be Feyre's distraction and give her body release, not offering anything else for fear she will shut down.

Readers: omg, that's so romantic! 😍 So hot 🥵

Cass: offers to be Nesta fuck buddy because he knows how she is pushing away from her feelings.

Readers: omg, he loves her so much! 😍 So hot 🥵

Az: gifts Elain with a especial necklace made for her, softly caresses her neck because he can't help it, ventures to kiss Elain after she gives him offer and permission, doesn't allow himself to think what comes next because she has a mate (who happens to be upstairs during said attempt!), but still dares to question the gods, implying he feels a connection so strong he can't understand why she is mated to another.

Some Readers: ew, fucking pervert! 😠 He clearly doesn't care for her 🙄 he wants to use her for perverted sex 😑 he's just saying that because she is the third sister 🙄 he doesn't even like her, who do this without a plan? How dare him not plan their next 500 years before that kiss?! 😒 Lazy bitch 😒

236 notes - Posted August 2, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #would you look at that #elriel fic writers: exist #me: and you get a reblog! and you get a reblog! and you get a reblog!#is this what a pyramid scheme looks like?#lol #the year was fun!#I should start posting about other books too #since elain's book will leave me hanging till I'm a granny...#😅😩😭

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