#I was saying sth to a friend in which I mentioned myself being gay and I realised too late the guy walking in front of us was a classmate | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

srrrokka · 2 years

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My dude that post on gatekeeping aceness is not it chief. OP isn’t trying to say sex repulsed is the default, it’s just so tiring to see your identity portrayed One Way or just flat out ignored. You can’t support ace people then tell us we’re wrong when we speak up on how we feel or how we’re portrayed/treated in fandom (or non fandom) spaces.

Hi! I'm going to preface this by saying that the following answer is in good faith and not angry at all. I actually like discussing stuff like that! I find how others view and experience the world very fascinating. So here we go:

I do understand your take and I do absolutely respect people interpreting characters whichever way they want as well as the importance of representation. But so it happens that I am also ace and the whole "speaking up" made me on many occasions want to cry and quit using tumblr altogether. It made me feel like I am told that the way I understand by own sexuality is wrong and bad, which as you can imagine is not the greatest message to get from "ace defenders".

See, OP does have a valid point but I think that being angry with how others want to do their own stories is not the way to go. Be the change you want to see in the world — make your own stories, art, etc, commission others to do it a certain way or suggest it when they have requests open — but don't push others down because you don't know who they are and how they experience what they see, yk? (Note: I'm not saying specifically that OP is attacking anyone because they clearly are not, they are mad at the whole phenomenon. But it happened many times before that people were aggressive and calling out/vague blogging about others in reference to the portrayal of that particular character. That being said, that post did call me aphobic so I'm a little offended about that one.)

From my ace side:

I personally find people aesthetically pleasing but not sexually attractive. Like it boggles my mind you can meet someone at a bar or sth and be like "I want to bang this person later tonight." At best I'd want to be friends.

But, while the concept of horizontal tango with anyone other than my significant other (which nota bene is super rare in the first place) repulses me INCREDIBLY, I love fictional smut of any kind because it isn't me and it's not happening in real life (and by the latter I mean it's not visually or tactilely realistic like for example porn videos are).

I like experiencing in fiction what I won't in real life. But I also like NOT experiencing things in fiction that I experience too much in real life. For example I often want to completely distance myself from the whole gender-sexuality stuff because I have to do with it too much and nothing being mentioned about any of that is actually quite nice.

In the same vein I personally find it unnecessary to specify someone's sexuality if it's not relevant to the story. For me it doesn't matter if a character is a gay/lesbian/ace/aro/straight/[inset your choice] if it's, let's say, no-romance, no-smut coffee shop AU about friendship that doesn't delve deeper into character design. I don't need it. A person is a person and I don't need a confirmation to headcanon whatever I want. And even if there is smut with an ace character, I know this character is ace regardless of the portrayal so it doesn't really grate on me at all.

BUT! That is my own personal preference. And I absolutely support you having your own preference! Just don't tell me mine is wrong.

This post is a good example of just that but within the trans community:

https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/srrrochka/667903163349843968

tl;dr of this rambling is: you do you, funky lil ace! but also let me do me, another funky lil ace! peace, love, and plants

#why do I not have ace on my page?#I used to. along with my age and my gender.#but tbh I decided eventually that it's no one's business but mine #if you'd like clarification on anything hit me up!#I'm happy to chat about this more #yo stuff #replies #anon

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kumikirin · 7 years

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Who are your closest friends on here and what are their qualities?

Oh. Oh, okay, this is a nice question that I wasn’t expecting! See, the word friends may be a lil strong to use here, since I don’t really interact with much people and I need a deeper connection to actually consider someone a friend. But I’ll list here all the awesome people I talk to and would like to get to know better ❤

Okay first of all of course @yourplisetsky bc dammit, Eve’s the only one I actually speak to outside tumblr. We have each other on Instagram, WhatsApp and Facebook, and I made myself a Snapchat account just bc of her (tho I had to delete the app bc I needed the space :c). We basically talk on a daily basis, and even if our convos have been kinda scarce and pretty slow lately bc we’ve been busy, she’s still always present with me, during my day, bc I’m constantly reminded of her by small things in my daily life. She’s my writing support and I miss her when I can’t talk to her, and I can tell her abt my problems and send her pics of my day and we talk abt lots of stuff, and I love her very much and want to meet her irl someday. She ma dood, ma Huffie Sis, ma Whine Support. The leche to my arroz.

Then we have @stillherewhileimgone, who was apparently following me for a while before messaging me, and she’s so great?? We don’t talk that much, yeah, but she’s really nice to talk to and SHE’S STUDYING SPANISH WTF nobody does that so sometimes she says sth in Spanish and I get all happy bc she tries so hard and I know Spanish isn’t the easiest? So whenever she does it right I’m so proud. Also we like lizards together and that’s cool too.

My fellow argentinian, @madamredwrites, who has like the cutest name ever and is also super nice to talk to AND A GREAT WRITER GO CHECK HER OUT PLS. Now, I’m kinda shy when I first start talking to someone, so that usually means a couple of awkward convos before I relax around the New Person, but I think by the second or third time I talked to this wonderful being we had a really long, pleasant chat, and I don’t even remember what it was about, I just know I really enjoyed it and I felt really at ease omg. She really easy to talk to. Plus, she also supports my writing and I Appreciate that, and has great ideas and okay, she’s overall great. Bonus: we can talk to each other in Spanglish.

Then there’s @aftgonice who is like a lil ball of sunshine wrapped in the softest cotton. We’ve talked like twice but I’d like to get to know her better bc she’s Nice, plus she’s a Huffie like me and she’s Italian so there’s a chance we’re long lost cousins lol. Plus, we can make the Italian Gesture™ together cause we’re allowed.

Aaannd @rayraywrites who’s also That Person Who I’ve Talked To Maybe Twice But Is Already Great. People always say there are lots of us med students around here but I think they liars bc I had never met another med student?? Until RAY APPEARED. So now I can go full nerd on someone and chances are they’ll understand what I’m saying and that’s so awesome bc I’m such a closeted nerd?? So anyway we’re both nerds and writers and we bond over that and I hope we get to talk more.

Especial mention to @life-is-str4nge, my dear Nana, who I know irl. She’s the Eli to my Nozomi, we ship gays together and she likes my cats and helps me bleach and dye my hair and she’s beautiful and also huggable and I wish we could see each other more and have sleepovers and coffee dates with our other friends but we can’t meet bc we busy.

There’s other people I’d like to talk more to, and to get to know better, but for some reason or another we haven’t talked that much or our convos don’t really work, idk maybe they’re shy or awkward like me so that’s why lol (or maybe they’re not interested in knowing me which is cool too).

Anyway, that’s about it, Anon ❤ thank you so much for this super cute ask bc it’s lovely and also a great oportunity to show my appreciation for these people, which I like doing but I’m too shy and awkward to do without a proper excuse. Except for Eve bc I say I love her almost daily, but she ma special dood so it doesn’t count.

#ask!#anonymous little monster #cute asks #the cutest ask ever #pls send me more stuff like this

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