Located my Pokemon Ranger game cartridge, dusted it off, and promptly plowed through the whole thing in one day. Now, why can’t I summon that kind of focus on command for things that are actually useful?
Anyway, I wanted to replay that thing to laugh at the Go-Rock Quads doing dumb shit like setting an important security password as “60” and filling their own currently actively in-use factory full of literal living bombs as an intended safety precaution, but holy shit I forgot there was so much Actual Plot in this fucking thing. I got sucker punched with like, Feelings and Emotions and shit right at the very end. Those last two main-game missions, man. What the fuck. I am SAD.
Spoiler alert but holy shit the Quads are actually Babie™️. I mean yeah, they’re idiot chaos demons who keep making things explode and it’s awesome so obviously I already knew that, but. They aren’t just doing ridiculously overblown ultraviolent bullshit because they’re obnoxious fucking dumbasses...it’s out of desperation.
Their dad's the Actual Malicious Asshole who's just on some assmad vengeance quest to Destroy exactly One (1) old rival of his and fuck up the whole world as collateral, and the Quads are just blindly doing whatever he says because, uh. Billy said something to the effect of Daddy Dearest will not love them anymore if they don't. They gotta be Useful To Their Father and thus Succeed at Doing Violence Real Good or they’ll get straight-up disowned. Bruh? What the fuck??
Like, they’re not even aware of the point to all of the Violence being done. Clyde says so. They are totally in the dark about Gordor’s actual Big Evil Master Plan. They have no fucking clue WHY their dad wants done what he wants done, they just know that they gotta Help Him Do It. Because they’ve been made to believe they are not worthy of his love if they are not useful enough to him. Dude. What the FUCK.
And Garret, the famously Stoic and Calm one, straight-up has a fucking breakdown when you defeat him for the second [and final] time. He started fucking stuttering and wheezing and shit. Because Daddy Won't Love Him Anymore Because He Keeps Getting His Ass Beat. Like, explicitly. My guy had an Actual Literal Panic Attack because his dad was “already losing faith in him” after he failed to protect the factory [...from you, the player], and now he’s gone and failed AGAIN so the thin ice he was standing on just shattered and he freaked. He lied and tried to play off the shaking like he was just Really Fucking Angry, but he was actually scared. The little 💦 effects above his sprite give it away, they weren’t the Pissed Off Steam Cloud effects. The 💦 show up to indicate a character is either sweating profusely or crying. Holy shit I am so sad.
And the whole point of Billy blowing up their own base after losing to the player was that he felt they had nothing left to lose after failing that final time. Potentially killing the ranger that wrecked their lives was just a nice satisfying bonus. He destroyed their whole hideout in fucking despair, and the Quads all ran off to start a whole new life somewhere else so they didn’t have to face their father because they didn’t want to hear him disown them. They were 100% certain that was what was coming and they just couldn’t bear to actually endure it. What the fuck...
Oh. Also. At the very end, right before the Final Boss Fight with Gordor, there's a Go-Rock Grunt you HAVE to beat before facing him, so you have to listen to what he says. [Actually, there are three grunts there, but the one on the mid-right is the only one that matters here.] This specific grunt complains about the fact that he ought to be a higher rank in the team because of his consistently excellent performance, but claims the reason that hasn't happened is...the boss favors his own kids too much. That grunt laments how it's impossible to truly rise to any significant and respected rank in the team if you're not one of the Quads. And this is RIGHT after Billy lost his shit and blew up the base. You hear that grunt say that shit RIGHT after THAT happens. The rest of the Go-Rock Squad thinks Gordor absolutely adores and even spoils his kids, and yet his kids don't feel like he loves them at all...it is highly evident that they are CONSTANTLY fighting for Any Scraps Of Affection from him by just continuously trying to outdo themselves via Extreme Obedience Overkill. These kids are not cherished, they are just the most Desperately Doggedly Obedient and thus useful.
Also! Also! The Quads are fucking attention whores. Like, that's the root of their whole entire Thing. "Hey! Hey!! Stop!! Look at us!! Remember our names!!" etc.; they're a loudass rock band for one, and they like to blow shit up which is also Loud, and they do obnoxious shit like band practice in the parking lot of the Dusk Factory at 2AM which bugs the Fall City locals when they're trying to sleep [according to one instance of an NPC bitching]. These guys Demand All Of The Attention. Positive OR negative. They’re just craving the acknowledgement. And that is...exactly how chronically emotionally neglected children would behave.
I am SO FUCKING SAD.
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