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dammitadolfnomorecake · 5 years

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🏰⚔️ DMODT- 9 start... do I keep writing this? Is it ok? I don't know anymore

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kenzieam · 6 years

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It’s Time - Chapter Two

Rating: M (language, eventual smut, angst)

Genre: Drama/Angst

@captstefanbrandt @iammarylastar @kiiiimberlyriiiicker1995 @notimetoblog @captain-ariel-barnes @jaamesbbarnes @lancefvcker @bitsandbobsandstuff @softlybarnes @lovelybbarnes @buckitybarnes @bucky-plums-barnes @moonbeambucky @badassbaker @citylights221 @empress-of-boujee @tbetz0341chook007 @shynara51 @diinofayce @casestudy-mw @jewels2876 @damnaged-princess @everythingisoverrated @allmyfanficfaves @melgoodwin @clarabella960 @curvybihufflepuff @angryschnauzer @wowspideyholland @sergeantwhitewolf @smilexcaptainx @plaidcat4815

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Potential Triggers, please read with caution

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“Levi.”

There’s only one person who calls me that, pronouncing it like ‘when the levee breaks’ and there’s only one person whose voice gives me chills, even after all these years. I take a deep breath, steeling myself and turn around.

“Bucky.”

He smiles tentatively, the smile dropping when I don’t return it. I notice his hand is clutching at the neck of his beer bottle, the knuckles white; is he nervous?

I’m not going to be the first one to talk, so I keep my mouth closed and study him instead. He’s thicker than he was in high school, far more muscular and defined; his hair is longer too, brushing his stubbly jaw. He’s wearing worn jeans and a red Henley, the sleeves pushed up; work boots like he came over directly from a construction site. But the eyes are the same, the same deep, soulful blue, the same blue I found myself getting lost in too many times to count.

“Can we.... can we talk?” He asks quietly, uncertainly.

I sigh. “What is there to talk about, James?”

He winces, I never use his given name and it only reminds him of the distance between us, exactly what I intended.

I’m too sober for this. “Nice to see you,” I chirp, totally aware that I’m being a petty bitch, and owning it. “Say hi to the wife and kid, or I guess, kids, by now.” I whirl and almost skip away, eyes searching for someone else to talk to.

Nat eyes me when I nudge her shoulder, make ‘gimme’ fingers for my niece. She hands her over with a tut of disapproval. “You enjoy that?”

“What?”

“Bucky. You couldn’t stand there for five minutes and talk to him?”

“Nope.” I pop the ‘p’ and start cooing down at Lou.

“He looks crushed.”

I don’t bother to glance up. “Good.” I coo, making Lou grin and babble up at me.

Nat sighs. “Lev, we’ve been friends a long, long time. You and Bucky have been an item since our first nap-time in kindergarten..... you’re being a real bitch right now.”

I pause in my baby-babble and glance at her, crane my head past her to look over at Bucky. He’s in profile to me, head lowered, picking at the label on his bottle. As I watch he inhales deeply, like he’s steeling himself, and walks away, past Sam and Wanda, past Steve and Clint at the grill and out the front gate. I feel a strange flutter in my chest, one so damn similar to what I’ve been feeling thinking about Clint left to deal with mom’s illness, and recognize it as guilt.

Dammit.

Giving Nat the stink-eye I hand Lou back to her and go after him.

“Bucky, wait!” I call, jogging between the vehicles in the driveway, nearly sideswiping Clint’s SUV because my head’s on a swivel, trying to find him. I spot him a couple dozen feet away, reaching to open the door of a battered pick-up.

He looks up, and too many emotions flash across his face for me to read. He turns to face me as I round the back of the truck and stumble to a halt a few yards away.

I cross my arms; Nat may have guilted me into going after him, but I’m not going to make this easy on him. “You wanted to talk?”

He swallows hard and nods, rubbing a hand over his mouth. After a moment he gestures to the cab. “You want to go for a ride?”

“No, I don’t think so.”

I pretend not to notice his slightly unsteady exhale and stay silent. He wanted to talk, so talk.

“I...” He breaks off, fiddling with his keys.

“Okay.” I snap. I tried. I turn to sprint back.

“Wait!” The edge of panic in his voice makes me pause and I turn my head to side-eye him, my chin touching my shoulder.

“I’m sorry.”

That pisses me off. Sorry? I whirl and let him have it.

“Sorry?! Sorry is what you say when you break my favorite coffee cup, not when you fuck someone else!”

“We were broke up!”

“A week!” I hear myself screech. I hate the sound and hold my hands up to silence his response. After a long moment I look up to meet his eyes. “You waited a week, then you stuck your dick in another woman-”

He opens his mouth but I cut him off.

“- and knocked her up too! That’s way beyond a pathetic ‘I’m sorry’, Barnes.”

“You never gave me a chance to explain-”

“Explain?! What is there to explain? You know what? This is stupid. Go home to her, James. You chose her over me when you fucked her.” I’m vibrating now, fighting the urge to storm forwards and punch his guilty fucking face. Instead I whirl and sprint back to the party, deciding it’s time to trade up from beer to the hard stuff. I don’t look back and, as I pass through the gates, i hear his truck start.

Nat looks up as I storm past her, heading for the drinks table and Clint grabs the second shot I’ve poured for myself out of my hand before I can slam it.

“Stop it.” He orders and I don’t even bother trying to reach for the glass, he’s using his Dad voice. He grips my upper arm and pulls me away from the table, up onto the covered deck before releasing me. “Now listen to me. I love you with all my goddamn heart and I will always support you. But this has to stop. It has been five years. Because of one man’s mistake and your overreaction to it I’ve missed out on five years with my twin sister in my life. You missed Lou’s birth, you haven’t been here for Mom and I’ve had to watch one of my best friends tear himself apart every single day since you ran off to Seattle.”

His words burn, but I can only focus on one thing. “Overreaction?”

He closes his eyes, shakes his head. “Yes. Overreaction. You had every right to be mad, but you didn’t need to move to the other side of the damn country!”

“I went to school there.” It’s a feeble reason, but I’m using it.

“Yeah, because there’s no schools on the east coast you could have gone to.” His voice is tired, resigned. “They’re not together anymore, they haven’t been for a long time.”

Despite myself, I find myself responding. “So?”

Clint raises his head, fixing me with an implacable expression. “You know as well as I do he was only with her out of obligation, and they broke up right after the baby was born.”

“Why? Novelty wore off? Taco no bueno?”

“You’ll have to ask him.”

“You don’t know or you’re just not going to tell me?”

“Not telling. You’ll have to lower yourself and speak to the man if you want to know.” With one last disapproving Dad glare, he walks away.

I watch him go, the conflicting emotions in my stomach starting to sour it. The warm and comforting coat I’ve been wearing, ‘V’ for Victim proudly displayed, is starting to itch.

Fuck it.

I’m not thinking about that shit right now, I not going to even entertain the possibility that I’ve wasted the last five years, that I’ve overreacted.

I storm back towards the booze.

***************************************************************************************************************************************************** Oh God.

What the hell did I drink last night?

I remember getting into some type of competition with myself, to see how many shots I could down, but it gets fuzzy after that. Something’s woke me up and it takes a second, between my impending hangover, and the goddamn sun shining right in my eyes, to realize that someone is sitting beside me, or more correctly, on the edge of the bed I don’t remember crawling into. Wincing and squinting, I finally narrow down the stranger and my eyes fly open, causing a stab of pain right into my brain.

“Ow! Jesus, Clint!” I try to hide under my blankets again but Clint rests his hand on my shoulder and murmurs my name, in a tone I’ve never heard before. It sobers me up quick. I raise my head and look at him.

“The hospice just called. Mom died this morning.” His voice is quiet.

“W-what?” I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck. “She’s dead? Why didn’t they call us sooner?”

Clint sighs. “They checked in on her at shift change, and when they looked in again less than a half-hour later, she was gone.”

My mouth opens but nothing comes out. No, this is too soon. I don’t realize I’ve said it out loud until Clint answers me.

“I think she was just waiting until you came home. She made all the arrangements months ago, all we need to do is call the funeral home when they open. I-” His cell phone rings.

He answers and even I can hear Lou crying in the background. He grimaces at me.

“Go,” I push gently, shoo my fingers at him and he stands, leans down and presses a kiss to my forehead.

“Come over to the house. People are going to start showing up and I don’t want you to be left alone.”

I nod numbly and he hurries out.

A thousand different emotions run through me, from guilt to sorrow to shame. And rising out of that murkiness is one definite, one constant that my body and mind has always called for when I feel like this, the one place where I feel safest; and I’m too messed up right now to remind myself that it’s wrong. I want Bucky.

No. NO.

I stumble out of bed, trip over my cast-off jeans and barely make it to the bathroom before I start vomiting. But it’s not my hangover emptying my stomach, it’s sorrow, grief and confusion. One part of me, the part that’s caving in on itself with anguish, wants Bucky right now, so badly it hurts; but another part is still raging and righteously indignant, still screaming for his head, ready to deny the comfort he would bring solely to continue to punish him.

I’m still heaving long after my stomach is empty and finally collapse over the seat, spitting weakly. When my head stops spinning I stagger to my feet and into the shower, sticky with sweat and shame.

***************************************************************************************************************************************************** The funeral food train has definitely pulled into the station. Every available surface in Clint and Nat’s kitchen is covered with dishes; casseroles and cakes, jellied salads and squares. People appear with food, murmur their condolences and leave again. Nat has drifted into the nursery with Lou, eyes red-rimmed while Clint has disappeared completely.

There’s an air of relief, and faint shame in the house and around everyone who stops by. Everyone is relieved that Mom has finally passed on, found the peace in death that the cancer stole from her life, and cannot help but feel a vague shame for that. You are not supposed to be happy that someone has died, even if it liberated them.

I drift through the kitchen, pausing to sniff furtively at a few dishes, at a loss for what to do. There are no arrangements to make, no flowers to choose, song to decide on, location to secure. Mom handled all of that when she was first diagnosed, citing her desire to have everything ‘just so’ for her final send-off, not anyone else’s idea of what she would have wanted. And while that’s something that is comfortingly Mom, it’s still aggravating. It’s taken away the busywork that helps a person along after the death, gives them something to focus on besides their fresh pain.

I find myself wandering up the stairs and into the guest room. The bedspread is a beautiful quilt, soft under my fingers. Pushing the curtains aside, I look out the window, let my gaze travel without aim over the backyard. While Lou is far too young to use it, there is a new playhouse in the corner, cheery flowers painted on the sides. Probably a gift from Mom. Movement catches my eye and I lean forwards, looking down.

Clustered in a loose circle, standing near the house are Clint and a few other men. Two of them are vaguely familiar from the party last night. The other two I know all too well. Steve is at Clint's right, in profile and on Clint's left, facing me, is Bucky.

They all hold beer bottles loosely in their hands and Bucky, surprisingly, has a cigarette dangling from his lips; as I watch he inhales deeply and pulls it from his mouth, flicking ash onto the grass and holding it down by his thigh between his index and middle finger with practiced ease. Clint, Steve and Bucky look morose, shoulders slumped, talking in low voices. Mom always favoured Clint over me, but she also doted on Steve, Sam and Bucky, her other 'boy-children' more than any female friends we brought around; and I realize that while Clint and I are mourning the loss of our mom, Steve and Bucky have lost a mother too.

A new rush of guilt hits me, my confrontation with Bucky last night was ugly, and so he was already emotionally overwrought, only to have it compounded by Mom's death this morning. I study his face, see lines that weren't there even last night and have to fight a sudden urge to turn around and run down the stairs, out into the yard and fling myself into his arms, tuck my head under his chin and hold him tight.

As I'm staring, thinking these forbidden thoughts, Bucky looks up, his eyes locking with mine.

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #au bucky barnes #bucky and nika #bucky and lev

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dammitadolfnomorecake · 5 years

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🏰⚔️ DMODT- 9 full

Levi was preparing for bed when he noticed something wrong. It started with a fear that filled his stomach, then progressed to pain in his hands. Dropping his blankets, he cried out in surprise as long thick wounds appeared in his palms "Erwin?" Turning from his bed, he raised his hands to show Erwin. Rushing to him, Erwin took his hands, as Levi sank down on the edge of the bed "What happened?" "I don't know... It's freezing" It felt as if his whole body had plunged into a frozen lake. Shivering, he only seemed to grow colder "We need a healer!" Opening his mouth to contradict Erwin, Levi choked. Coughing and hacking hard, something seemed to be lodged in his throat. Pulling his hand from Erwin's, he shoved his fingers down his throat, trying to catch the edge of whatever was there "We needed a healer in here!" His whole frame heaved as he finally caught the forgein object, coughing as he pulled it from his throat, lubricated as he vomited. Across from them, there was a flurry of movement. Erwin grabbing whatever was in his hand as the royal healers rushed to his side. Fussed over, the healers couldn't tell him what was wrong with him. His hands were healed by magic, but the chill wouldn't leave. Bundled up in thick furs, he was finally left to rest in peace when he started snapping over how shitty he felt. If someone had wanted to kill him, wasn't there a nicer way to do so? Like a simple sword to heart? Or a good old fashioned decapitation? Not freezing him and choking him to death, like a goddamn coward. Sitting up on his bed, he glared at Erwin. The man was supposed to be his bodyguard... and he hadn't stopped whatever attack this was from happening, instead the man had backed off and had been staring at his hand rather intently for the past hour. Coughing, his chest hurt from effort. His voice a rasp "What the hell are you looking at?" Holding up the diamond shaped object, it was about an inch long, and as thin as hair. Sparkling in the light, he could make out the colour green "What is it?" "A dragon scale" Why the fuck would he be coughing up dragon scales?! How the hell did that even happen?! Eren... They'd only encountered one dragon, and the damn thing had been dead "That little shit. I'm going to fucking kill him" "L-Erwin. What do you mean?" Dragging himself out of bed, he shuffled over to snatch the scale out of Erwin's hold. The sharp edges of the scale cut into his palm. His scent filling with anger as growled "First Eren's playing with a dead dragon, now I'm coughing up a dragon scale! I'm going to kill him" "We don't know..." "Oh come off it. There's something wrong with him! This stinks of him and his fucked up fucking magic!" Dissolving into coughs, Erwin rose from his bed, lifting him like he was a child and carrying him back over to his bed "We don't know this was Eren. Zeke has his own mages" "You think Zeke tried to kill me?" "Or a spell went wrong?" "It's a dragon scale!" "Keep your voice down. It's suspicious enough that Zeke didn't come to see what the noise was about" "This is clearly Eren getting his revenge for being sent away" His throat hurt like a bitch "Do you really think he's so vindictive?" "He's gone and I'm coughing up a fucking scale" "Stop saying "fucking". It makes it hard to have a civilised conversation" "Some body guard you are. The brat tried to kill me" "You may be a tremendous arsehole, but I doubt Eren would try to kill you. He took his vows to the kingdom, and for him to against your word is to go against the kingdom. Which would cost him his life. No. I think there's something more than that. We should cut the hunt short and head back to the castle as soon as possible" "And how do you intend to pull Prince Zeke from his hunt? No. Our healers won't mention this, and the hunt shall continue as if nothing happened. We'll watch and wait... if Eren thinks I'm dying from one shit scale, the kid has another thing coming" Erwin sighed heavily "You're not going to budge, are you?" "Would you? If this is Zeke, he may well have formed a plan to kill me. If this is Eren, I won't give him the satisfaction of me ending the hunt" "You're a thoroughly unpleasant man" "I am your prince. You will do this" "Fine. But I still don't think Eren is responsible" "For his sake, he better not be" The hunt continued another three days before Zeke declared he was bored with the lack of game. The alpha had enquired after his health the morning after his choking incident, which he had played down as his bodyguard completely over reacting after he'd accidentally caught his hand on his sword. The alpha had laughed at him, and mocked him over his "boo boo", but didn't seem to have been involved. In a lot of ways Zeke was a brilliant actor, yet his surprise seemed genuine enough, reinforcing his belief that Eren was involved. The kid was in for a major arse kicking once he got back to the castle. * The castle was still standing when they returned. Hanji and Moblit were waiting to greet them, along with one of the mages of the castle. He wasn't in the mood to deal with anything that wasn't a hot cup of tea, or a warm soapy bath, but Hanji wouldn't even allow him that. Climbing off his horse, she was lead away before he could even protest. Hanji waiting until he moved towards the castle doors, before falling into step with him "We have a situation" "I gathered by your greeting. What happened?" "Moblit and Eren were attacked" "Of course they were. No offence Moblit, but Eren is trouble" "It wasn't Eren's fault. There were bandits near Shinganshima" Levi came to a stop. Hanji may be in control when both he and Erwin were absent from the castle, and she knew she was supposed to report shit like that immediately. Beside her, Moblit looked pained. An arm wrapped around his waist as he looked to his feet "If bandits were an issue, why have I heard nothing?" "Because they were taken care of. Moblit was there" "Moblit, speak" The man cleared his throat "We were attacked in the inner walls, passing near Shinganshima on our way back to the castle. Archers felled the first soldier, the other two fighting while filled with arrows. Eren was hiding under the cart when he was pulled free..." Moblit looked to Hanji, then over to Zeke and his party "Is this something we should be discussing inside?" "Most definitely" "Talk while we walk. I need a hot shower" Hanji and Moblit kept their silence until they entered Levi's chambers. The sheets and blankets had been freshly changed, while a warm fire burned in the hearth "Now. Explain this attack. And Eren's part" "Eren killed them all" Hanji covered her mouth as if it took back her outburst. Groaning, Levi could feel an Eren induced headache forming "How? Why? What happened to the soldiers?" "All three died. One giving his life to push Eren out the way. I'd left to relieve myself, they'd attacked in my absences. Eren and the group were exchanging words... but they refused to heed his warning to leave him alone" "Moblit, you're starting to sound like Hanji. What did Eren do?" "He turned them to stone. The man who seemed to be the leader pointed his blade at him. Eren wrapped his hands around it, then the world shaked. The sky turned red as wind built around him..." "So he used his magic to turn them stone?" "He doesn't remember doing so, but there was something more to it. I'm not a magic user, but even I felt the sinister presence in his magic" "Sinister?" "His eyes glowed black. It was the dead of night, yet it was as clear as day. His eyes grew black as his body seemed to flicker for a moment. When the spell faded, the bandits were stone" Levi sighed, moving his hands to massage at his temples with his fingers "And you?" "Copped a blast of what seemed to be wind magic as I tried to move closer to Eren. It is nothing more than an uncomfortable bruise" "That's good. It was smart of you not to make yourself known" Hanji nodded, starting excitedly "We have the statues moved here, and Levi, it's the most incredible thing. Their whole bodies are stone. Their clothes. Their weapons. Their boots and belts. They all look as if they were carved from stone" "And the no longer live?" "Definitely not" "How can you be so sure?" "One lost its head during transport. That's how we know the inside is also stone" Eren certainly didn't do things in moderation "And where is Eren?" "He's locked himself in his quarters and won't come out" Levi closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. Holding it, he counted to three before releasing it "Why?" "Because he's scared of his magic. He knows I'm not his actual master, and begged to be locked away where he couldn't hurt any one" "And you did?" "He was quite agitated. His magic kept flaring and he was hurting himself" "How? Was it sparks of fire again?" "It started as spinning winds slicing at his arms... but..." Hanji sucked her lips in, trying to school her features "Spit it out" Letting out a snorting laugh, Hanji was all smiles "He accidentally created a thunderstorm that hovered over his head and small bolts kept zapping him. It was hilarious" "It was only hilarious until Eren accident zapped her with it" "Well, duh. It's not like I want him to be hurt, but it was his own personal storm" Levi had a fair idea of what that was like. He'd seen it when mounting the teen, the way the storm had appeared from nothing, and the way the lightening strikes had flared out across the room "Moblit, when did this happen?" "The night we left camp. He passed out on the way back to the castle. I'll never forget how cold he was" Cursing under his breath, he straightened himself up "I'll need the report delivered to me. And not a word of this to Marley. Did you send a dragon to Draecia?" "Yes, sir. They sent a falcon thanking us, and have collected the skull and diamonds" They did? They'd been right there in the forest, yet he hadn't seen any dragons or heard anything out of the ordinary... "Did they say anything?" "No. I still can't believe there was a dragon corpse that far south" "You and me both, Moblit" Moblit was the only one he trusted to send a message through to Draecia. If they hadn't said anything, then nothing had been missing from the remains. Erwin had been right. He'd been too hard on Eren without knowing what happened "You're both dismissed. Leave Eren where he is for now. If his magic is out of control, it's better he can't unleash it on the castle, or its inhabitants" "Levi, what are you going to do? He needs a real master to draw out his powers. This isn't working" "I'll think of something... right now, I wish to bathe. Our tents might be expanded with magic, and have basic facilities, but nothing compared to clean bath and bathroom" Bathing until his skin had turned pruney, Levi loved the feeling of being clean. What he didn't love was knowing he'd have to face Eren. He didn't see why the teen would be so upset over the death of trash. Erwin wasn't waiting for him when he left his room, so Levi was left to walk through the castle alone, ignoring the maids and servants that bowed as he passed. He might have been playing the prince for over a decade, but he still didn't enjoy people bowing at him, or addressing him as "sir". It wasn't until he was on the servants side of the castle, that he realised he couldn't actually remember where Eren's room was, with one hundred percent certainty, and as the prince he wasn't about to suffer through a bout of embarrassment for choosing the wrong room. Every shitty hallway looked the same with its smooth stone walls and red carpets. If he wasn't so pissed off at the omega, he might have been able to stop and take breath, then realise he wasn't even on the same floor as the teen. Where was Shitty Sir Fluffybrows when he needed him? Closing his eyes, it slowly dawned on him, he was supposed to have a bond with Eren... which meant he should be able to find the kid... what else was this stupid bond useful for? Right. Now... Eren. It was weird and uncomfortable, Levi standing in the hallway long enough to fell well and truly stupid as he tried to concentrate on the kid. There was a slight tingling in his nape, a cold feeling in his chest and whole lot of no idea where he was going as he took his first step back down the hall. Letting the tight self control he had slip was hard, as was ignoring his instincts to follow something that seemed so stupid to him. After another dozen set of halls, and a set of stairs down, he finally found himself out the omegas door. The tingling had spread to a warmth, though his lungs still seemed as if someone had shovelled ice cubes down his throat. Knocking on Eren's door, he raised himself to stand taller, to play the role of the prince he was supposed to be. When the omega didn't answer, Levi sighed to himself as he tried the door handle, finding it locked as Hanji had said "Open up!" He could feel Eren on the other side of the door. He knew the brat could hear him "Eren, open this door at once! Or I'll kick it down" Trying the handle again, this time it gave. The shit could have at least opened it. Opening Eren's door, he let himself into the dark room, before closing the door behind him. Sitting in the frame of his window, Eren was wrapped in a thin blanket. The kid staring out across the castle grounds, as he pointedly ignored looking Levi's way. Filled with discomfort, his alpha was demanding the attention of the omega "I heard about the attack. You have my thanks for saving the life of Moblit" That sounded princely enough, didn't it? "Eren, I hear you've locked yourself away. Why?" Looking to him, Eren's eyes were blank. The kid looked deathly ill, with such a pale complexion and deep bags under his eyes "If you are ill, why..." "I don't care anymore" Sliding from the window frame, Eren sagged. Rushing to him, Eren swung out before he could him "Eren..." "No. I'm a magic user without a master. I killed those men... That wasn't what I came here to do" "So you're throwing a tantrum?" "I figured it out... it must have been fun..." Coughing, Levi could smell the blood in the air as Eren covered his mouth with a wrapped hand, the bandages a dirty creamed, striped with way too much brown-red. The omega was seriously ill... why hadn't anyone noticed? Why hadn't Eren tried to help himself? "Why! Why do you hate me?! I never hurt you... you took it all away... why couldn't you let me die?" As Eren's eyes rolled back, Levi hefted him into his hold "You stupid brat. This isn't easy for me either..." Using his knees to balance Eren, Levi moved an arm up over his shoulder, tucking the omega's face to his neck "It's not like I don't feel anything for you... but I can't... I can't give you what you want from me. I can't give you love, or open affection you fool" Why was he explaining when Eren was unconscious and couldn't hear him? Probably for just that fact. He was too much of a coward to tell the teen to his face that he was the one who was supposed to be his master, and that each time he was with Zeke, he felt a jealousy burning inside of him. He was a puppet prince. Only a stand in until either war came, or the people who'd killed Erwin's parents and their associates were bought to light. He owned no land of his own. His name was forced upon the real prince. All he had with his temper, and the power to make Erwin's words into reality. That was it. He couldn't give Eren anything, or everything he wanted and needed. Plus. Whoever he took as a lover wouldn't stay secret. They'd be expected to take their role by his side... He couldn't give the people a false princess, or prince in this case... which was even if Marley approved the relationship, something the doubted Zeke would do given the man's own interests in Eren. * Taking Eren to his chamber, the guards both stared as he sent them to find both Erwin and a healer. In his arms, Eren still hadn't regained consciousness. The omega felt way too fucking light, and as if he were to let go, the teen would simply fade away. Laying Eren down on his bed, he pulled his furs up to cover him, before pulling his hands free. He needed to see the damage. He needed to know what Eren had been trying to hide from Hanji and Moblit. Starting with Eren's left hand, the smell from the wounds was putrid. Small open sores oozed, but the sword wound in the teen's palm looked revolting. Angry red lines ran from it, infection had clearly set in. The stupid boy should have been healed when he'd returned the castle, as Moblit should have known better than to allow the kid to tend to them himself. Or maybe Eren had told Moblit that he would heal himself? He'd prefer to think that Eren had tried to heal himself, rather than that the kid felt he deserved the pain and injuries. "Is that Eren?" Looking to Erwin, Levi realised he probably looked suspicious as he knelt by Eren's right side. Attending to unwrapping Eren's right hand, he'd had to move to the other side of his bed, and climb up "Throw the bandages in the fire. And is the healer coming?" Erwin wrinkled his nose as he took the two piles of soiled bandage away from Eren's side, to throw them in the hearth "What happened?" "He left his wounds to fester. Clear sword cuts, in the same places as mine" "Shouldn't he have been healed?" "Apparently not. I thought he would have been too. And it's not just his hands" Seeing a scratch on Eren's wrist, he'd slid the sleeves of Eren's thin tunic up, to find them running right up both his arms "Why did you bring him here?" "Because he knows. Or suspects... he asked me why I didn't let him die, and why I did this to him" Erwin returned to the side of Levi's bed, sinking down to turn Eren's left hand palm up. The man staring at Eren's wound as he spoke "What will you do?" "I don't know. You know the situation" "And you know how I feel" "Do you?" "You're allowed to develop feelings" "Feelings are a luxury that will only lead to danger" "Then take him as a lover" "I couldn't do that. You know as well as I do, why" "I'm not telling you to marry him" "And if Zeke were to find out, can you image how that would go down? He'd stop at nothing to destroy him" "You're making excuses" "Because I seem to be the only one who's thought this through" "He's your omega through the vow of magic" "And how does that affect him? Does that mean he could never choice a normal lover? Never have a normal family? I'm sure his adoptive sister feels more for him than that" "Court mages have both their masters and families..." Levi growled. Erwin was the prince! He should understand why it couldn't be! "And how would that work? Him being treated as a whore by the prince, and going home to his real family at the end of each day" "He cares about you, and you care about him" "He couldn't give two shits about me. He hates me..." "He knows it was you saved him" "And he knows I fucking bonded with him and then passed him on to Hanji. You're not stupid" "Sirs?" Interrupted by the healers, Levi and Erwin both moved back from Eren "Eren requires healing. He's wounded and quite ill" The head healer walked to Eren's side, taking Eren's left hand with both hands "He was seen to after the incident. These wounds should have healed" "You saw to him?" "He was seen to. Magic put in place to heal his injuries, but these wounds have been infected by magic" "Infected?" "Mmm, yes. His own magic turning against the healing magic" Levi sighed to himself. Magic was so fucking confusing "His magic has never been stable" "His master should be seeing to that" Which would technically be him... he didn't know how to go about asking what he wanted to know, without giving the old healer a heart attack "How would his master do that? As you know, both the prince and I aren't magic users" "I know our ways seem strange to you, but with wounds like this, his master should be feeling affects. I need to examine him completely before I can tell you exactly what is wrong with him. Shall we remove him from your chambers, sir?" Yes. No. He didn't want Eren to be moved from his bed, not when the kid wasn't alright. Eren was liable to faze him out completely if Levi let him be moved from his side "No. He has a stubborn streak, deeper than any mule. I know his master, so you will report the best course of action to us" "Very good, sir" Erwin had his "dad" look on his face as they stood outside his door. Levi turning his back to the man, before turning back to him "I don't want to hear it" "I said nothing" "I don't know what comes next" "And we won't until the healers pass their decision" "I can't give him anything..." "Has he asked for anything?" "No. But... this feeling thing is shit" "Well, why did you mount him? What did your alpha tell you?" "What every alpha thinks of an omega in heat, to breed him. To make him mine... he even fucking called me his alpha" "When I saw Eren, I admit I wanted to fuck him, but I didn't feel that he was mine" "Don't..." "Levi, you can't deny it. He started your first rut" "What bit of "don't", didn't you understand? Besides, he started yours too" "And as sweet, and charming as he is, I haven't ever once had the thought that he should be mine" Levi's eyes narrowed as he hissed "We can't be a thing!" "It's not unusual for an alpha to take an omega to relieve their urges" "You really have a way of butchering words" "Maybe that's why you're so short? Height deprivation through sexual frustration" "And that's why you're so tall? Because you fuck everything you can?" Erwin shrugged "I'm careful, and there's no reason to deny pleasure if it's safe and consensual" Levi didn't like to admit he didn't know how safe sex with Eren would work. He didn't know if Eren was fertile... Shit... he didn't know how to do the do... would it be awkward if... or what if... what if it was bad and Eren didn't like it... what if he didn't like it? What if he did something wrong? What if Eren's magic hurt either of them? "You're panicking" "Shut it" "You have fucked someone before, haven't you?" "Yes!" Seething, and defensive, his scent flared with his anger. He'd fucked Eren. Twice... and had wanted to do it a whole lot more. Did dreams count? Because he'd definitely had some pretty intense dreams about Eren too... Oh, fuck... he really did have it bad for the brat with the bright green eyes... How could this have happened?! He usually kept such a level head... He knew his role. He knew he had to be the prince everyone wanted him to be... and now he was in love?! Love?! Hold up. Was it love? He didn't know Eren all that well... shouldn't he know him... better? And know more about him than his magic was crazy, and his arse felt like it was made for him?! Pfft... he couldn't be in love... was he? "Then what are you worried about?" "Just shut up!" Erwin chuckled lightly, enjoying his discomfort. Levi's heart was racing so stupidly hard, he couldn't stop himself as he slid down the wall to the floor, gripping his hair as he continued to mentally freak out. He wasn't supposed to be falling for Eren! "Hey..." "Don't. Ok. I can't right now. We need to wait for the mages to tell us what to do next"

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