#after pointing at some gnomish phenomenon

[synonymroll648]

opinion: ro’s character might be a lot more useful narrative-wise if her being a microbiologist wasn’t just acknowledged, but explored. 

in the books, we see her show the characters (and consequently, the reader) that she knows what she’s doing, and that ogres pride themselves on having a lot of knowledge when it comes to microbiology. particularly using that knowledge to make effective weapons, both almost harmless and lethal. 

but there’s so much more potential w/ ogre microbiology than just them having good weapons because of it. ogres (authorities, at least, like ro) being interested enough in expanding their microbiology knowledge that they’d be willing to collaborate more with other species? like how they cooperated with lady cadence on figuring out how soporidine works? it could open so many doors! 

we could have ro branching out to make ‘trial run’ alliances with other species (like elves, goblins, and most importantly, gnomes) to do joint studies of how certain things work on a microscopic and ‘normal’ scale. we could see that her being a princess doesn’t just mean she’s a good fighter and that she’s got connections, but she can also be a diplomat. it’d make her being in the lost cities a lot more important, plus, it’d be a great chance for shannon to flex some worldbuilding. ro could also flesh out connections she’s made in the lost cities (like with sophie’s bodyguards [i’m thinking of flori and sandor in particular] and elvin authorities she’s had to deal w/ like mr. forkle and the council) through sharing or gaining knowledge as a microbiologist. 

using ro as a character-driven plot device, ogres could add ‘willing to cooperate even with creatures we have negative history with for science’ to their reputation among other enlightened species. it’d make ogres more nuanced, and maybe, if shannon decided to go this route, cause problems for elves who claim their interspecies role is being peacekeepers. 

#i am having brainworms about the untapped potential of ro as a character ok #i wanna see her be more than the stand-in for wattpad sokeefe girlies!! #believe it or not this is the shorter version of what i originally wrote #like. she doesn't have to give up being an excellent warrior!! she doesn't have to give up being snarky!! #but she can be less 'oh look what i know and you don't hahaha LOSER' #and more 'listen if i give you this info will you tell me how this works?' #and it'd be so much more interesting! #also her maybe bonding with elwin over biology would be SUCH a win #strangers to 'you seem cool and we're also the closest keefe has to parental figures of sorts so we're bros now' #like. c'mon. it'd be so great man #also i keep picturing ro picking up flori and putting her on her shoulder #and walking around wildwood and going 'tell me how this works from your pov' #after pointing at some gnomish phenomenon #and then listening to flori ramble #and then when she's done going 'alright. that sounds funky in a good way. wanna see what science has to add?' #and then ro whips out a microscope she just has bundled up in one of her ten million pockets and runs a mini experiment with flori #manipulating the plant to do something and ro looking in the microscope and adding commentary on how that works on a cellular level #and them becoming friends!! perhaps. maybe even. because i have accidentally dug myself into a new rarepair hell. lovers #ogre queen ro being independent on the throne is something i love and is realistic #but it'd also be fun from a fanon point to have her just have a gnomish gf. or permanent fiancee. or wife #like. oh yeah i killed the guy my dad forced me to marry so i could get the throne after my dad died. #yeah i'm committed to this cute little gnome that i met because our charges were dating back when i was a bodyguard #pleeeeease. ro's snark + flori's genuine attitude towards everything?? them bringing out their main traits in each other?? #plus the fucking HEIGHT DIFFERENCE?? it'd be so cute oh my god #as a lesbian of short stature i think flori deserves a tall buff lady to sweep her off her feet #also flori sweeping ro off her feet using a tree or something would be funny as FUCK #might ramble on ro and sandor tolerating each other better because of studying how transforming a corpse to gold works and then expanding #that concept to apply to other things would be cool to see #kotlc #keeper of the lost cities

[abucketofdumbos]

A little shimmy, a little shake.

Norei had never quite imagined using a bucket as a weapon, but as Ahnika rushed at her, bucket in hand, the idea rattled around in her mind. Buckets definitely could be used as weapons, right? She quickly contracted the muscles of her abdomen and pulled her chest into her knees. Normally, the effort put into folding herself over wasn’t particularly difficult, but the fact Norei was dangling a few feet off of the ground by a rope caught around her ankle certainly didn’t make things easier. Pudgy pale hands reached for the rope fruitlessly as she attempted to free herself, Ahnika still swinging the bucket furiously up at her.

“Baby, doll face, sugar- sugar tits? Is that a compliment?,” Norei grunted, still holding her position, “I need you to not do that.” She could tell her sweet talking hadn’t worked quite as well as she’d hoped, Ahnika’s swings hastening as she extended her reach.

“Give me the gems.” Ahnika barked while arching the bucket higher this time. Its’ rusty lip connected with one of Norei’s exposed shoulders. A sleeveless shirt, why had she worn a sleeveless shirt? Norei cursed her wardrobe as the searing pain of metal cutting through the skin of her shoulder blade caused her to drop limp from her position. She dangled still by the rope, swaying from side to side. For a moment she’d considered exactly how much of a loss it would be to give Ahnika the gems. This was one of those rare ‘high profile’ jobs she’d get every so often and Ahnika herself seemed to be teeming with them. Norei definitely needed the money, or at least she wanted it, but the thought did occur to her that perhaps she didn’t necessarily need or want it enough. She was essentially rich by proximity at this point, right?

No, her mind dismissed that thought as soon as it came to her. Flynn was rich. She was not.

Norei tossed her weight to the side as, from the corner of her eye, she caught the bucket swinging back at her full speed. The rusty tin just missing her face this time. She glared over at Ahnika, not particularly pleased at the girl’s attempts to bludgeon her with a glorified beach pail.  

“Stoppit!” Norei snipped over at the woman, her body arching back towards the position where Ahnika had just struck.

“You knocked my rapier away, Norei. Would you prefer I had the rapier?”

“Well, I mean- no? Could you just,” Norei’s voice caught in her throat, she let off a sharp gasp as the item connected with her sternum. It had just enough force behind its swing to propel her backwards on the line of rope. The back of her head connected first with the wall behind her before the rest of her came crashing in. A sharp stinging pain shot to her temples and the rope holding her supine groaned under her weight. It had apparently become entirely too tired of holding her up and, much to her dismay, it chose then of all moments to snap. Her body slid down the wall and crumpled into a small pile on the sand below her.

Before her initial arrival, Norei had considered long and hard why she remembered despising Uldum. Was it the sun and her pale skin’s tendency to burn? Was it the cheesy thought of treasure hunting in old catacombs? Maybe the cat-men that inhabited the area? She hadn’t been able to pinpoint it then, but now, as grains of sand dug into the gash on her shoulder and settled over every inch of her person, she was certain what it was. The sand. She hoped all the sand in the world, every last particle, would go to hell. She reluctantly forced herself up from the ground. Ahnika had already seized the opportunity to begin scouring the catacomb for her rapier, keeping a keen eye on Norei as she began to rise. Norei didn’t have any particular interest in this bit. She and Ahnika ran in very different rings. See if being a criminal could be quantified in ranks, then Ahnika trumped her in every way. Murder, thievery, extortion, the whole mess of it. Norei just wanted to steal from folks occasionally, bat her lashes a bit, lie if she had to, and maybe on the rare occasion flash a little cleavage. But Ahnika? Ahnika always wanted a fight and in maybe the world’s strangest turn of events, the girl never won them. At least not against Norei.

Norei certainly didn’t win them either. Winning implied that she had put some amount of effort into her successes. No, rather for some strange and inexplicable reason, the world had taken pity on her in this one specific way. Ahnika’s list of crimes certainly outnumbered Norei’s, in fact just the number of people she’d killed alone managed to leave Norei a bit wigged out every time they saw one another. However, Norei wasn’t entirely sure Ahnika could even kill her! She’d been convinced at one point it was because Ahnika had been infatuated her, but one too many close calls had proven that theory wrong. No, what occurred  between them was a rare glimpse into an unspoken phenomenon in the world. Occasionally the small guys won, and not the kind of small guys who ought to win, but the ignorant and incompetent kind, and in the great story of Norei and Ahnika– well, Ahnika didn’t win very often.  

Norei dusted off a thin layer of sand from her chest. Hurriedly reaching for the pack slung around her shoulder and searching for her only line of defense, a gnomish pocket knife which, while having served her well in her younger years, had dulled and rusted over years of abuse. What her hand found instead were handfuls upon handfuls of sand. How was it possible that in every way, shape, and form, sand managed to find out how to be the fucking worst thing imaginable? She echoed this sentiment before looking up dumbfounded at her now armed foe.

Ahnika had collected the rapier and with a smug chuckle she begun to circle in. Painted red lips clashed with skin tanned from years spent being–well, frankly, an adventuring criminal. Ebony locks were tied back in a loose ponytail that swayed from side to side as she took calculated steps around the girl. Norei couldn’t help but feel a tinge of panic. This wasn’t how it was supposed to pan out in her mind. More often than not at this point, Ahnika would have been struck by some great series of misfortune that inevitably lead to Norei’s escape. Her mind recalled one recent scenario in which both she and Ahnika had the great misfortune of running into one another while being commissioned to collect a grimoire of interest from a cave located in Felwood. Norei had been but a few moments away from grabbing the book when she’d heard Ahnika approaching, so with the intention of finally avoiding a scuffle, she’d backed away into the shadow of a corner. Ahnika had only to just place her fingertips on the spine of the book when a cage constructed of some kind of fel-magic entrapped her. Norei had half expected the construction to disappear after a few moments, but as the impending footsteps, presumably whatever beast was bound to protect the item, closed in Norei couldn’t help but seize her opportunity. She watched Ahnika’s eyes drag over her as she faded into the light of the cave’s lanterns and plucked the book up into her digits. Norei almost felt bad leaving the girl there, as if perhaps she was honor bound to stay. Ultimately, favoring her departure. She was a gambling woman with most things, but her life? She didn’t gamble with that very often.

Yet this particular instant didn’t feel nearly as chummy. Sure, she’d been glad to see Ahnika survived that night in Felwood. Norei would be remiss without someone in her life to offer her a good solid rivalry of sorts, but as the tip of the woman’s rapier drew up the center of her chest and found passage to her chin, Norei wasn’t feeling particularly palsy-walsy.

“So, while this is incredibly sexy- really vibing off the whole ‘powerful woman that could kill me’ bit..I’m just suggesting we call it even,” Norei offered with a smarmy smile.

Ahnika’s free hand thrusted forward, “Give me the gems, Norei.”

“Don’t think I can do that today, dove. Got a lot of money wagered on this particular job.”

“Oh,” Ahnika shoved the tip of her rapier sharply under Norei’s chin, forcing her eye line up, “forgive me. I didn’t realize you’d come to play with the big boys today, and with what? A pocket knife?”

Norei’s lips twisted to the side and she muffled a loud ‘tut’, “A gnomish pocket knife,” she clarified.

“Give me the gems, Norei.” Ahnika was clearly at the end of her patience with the girl. The rapiers tip drug dangerously close to Norei’s neck. Any proximity with sharp things and her neck made Norei uncomfortable. She allowed her eyes to dart around aimlessly, mulling over just exactly how shit it’d be to die in a catacomb, surrounded by sand, and in Uldum of all places. Cat-men be damned, she hated this place.

It was in that very instant that all the magic occurred. The cacophony of misfortune suddenly focusing down on Ahnika in favor of Norei. Maybe it was something far more logical, perhaps the instant Norei had slammed against the wall had caused something from the platform up above to knock loose. Maybe their presence alone was enough to cause the catacomb to start to fall into itself. Norei preferred the idea that some deity out there had her back, but ultimately either worked in this situation. The platform she’d only moments ago rolled off of, while fending off Ahnika who was grappled on top of her, began to shed some of its weight. Small bits of rubble falling down towards the two, until finally and much to their horror, rather large chunks began to hurtle down.

Norei seized the guise of sand and rubble as prime opportunity to peel. She skittered across the catacombs floor, ducking below a few dips in the terrain and making a beeline for the exit. She couldn’t help but give a cursory look back, assuring herself Ahnika had in fact avoided the near death experience. Ahnika skirted a few pieces of rubble, sliding roughly against the floor before ducking and rolling just a few feet out its line of impact. She drew into a crouch, rapier poised and ready, her hues scanning until they found Norei across the way. There was something extremely primal in her then, Norei saw it, fascinating and disconcerting. What if Norei’s luck had run out today? Would this have been the time Ahnika killed her? Norei couldn’t help but give a mocking wiggle of her fingers as the woman stared through the thick plume of dust and sand. Quickly Norei slipped out of the catacomb and began her mad dash for freedom, thinking fondly of the wild spirit in Ahnika’s eyes and the smug taste of freedom she felt in return.

Today had gone gone just as she’d planned.

Not entirely planned at all.

#malanorei #i'm just going to forever write secondary characters i never develop #i'm also crossing secondary characters over between toons lol #cause i'm a pos #i have written every day this month #get ready for me to start shit posting the things i've edited #im so sorry