#also just makes me think of how sceleritas will tell an evil durge that the worst thing they've ever done

[fandom-geek]

i think the thing that really gets me about pre-canon durge is their absolute sense of duty, and their utter isolation outside of the cult of bhaal.

most of the cultists seem eager to see durge upon their return, and one even says they were the first to feed him flesh. gortash tells them of an exhibition of a bhaalspawn's corpse and another bhaalspawn's creations and durge immediately plans to attack the hall of wonder to recover them. they then apparently entrust said bhaalspawn's corpse to sceleritas fel to "restore" through taxidermy. they deride orin for her artistry with corpses explicitly because "bhaal will never care" and because orin "[does] not understand lord bhaal".

even their infamous prayer for forgiveness is framed around their absolute submission to bhaal's plans, and the crime that requires forgiveness? admiring his rival's chosen. that's one line, and the next three paragraphs are swearing to carry out his plan exactly as they've been told to, all for his forgiveness.

hell, even their room reinforces this. orin has barely touched the place aside from installing her mother's corpse and her manifesto - and that is some of the only decoration. what was it before orin, an empty room with skulls, a bed, a desk, some chests and a wardrobe?

the durge didn't have any semblance of a life outside of bhaal, aside from gortash. and is it any surprise? the only other hint they ever had a life outside of the cult is the flashback of kid durge murdering their adopted family, all thanks to their father's urging.

bhaal even tries to force them back into isolation after they've been tadpoled by forcing them to kill alfira, and then trying to force a durge who resists him to kill their lover. if they continue resisting, bhaal kills them. bhaal will not allow them to have a life outside of him and, if it weren't for jergal, he would've succeeded.

#bg3 spoilers #the dark urge #honestly writing this all out it's weird that bhaal doesn't try to kill your party when you're at the temple #it'd be perfectly in line with everything else he'd done to durge up until that moment #also just makes me think of how sceleritas will tell an evil durge that the worst thing they've ever done #is giving a beggar a coin without asking for anything in return #ymmv and everyone has their own headcanons but pre canon durge was not a happy or enthusiastic participant as far as canon shows #which is reinforced by gortash saying you've always been better at controlling your urges than orin! #why would durge bother to do that when 'all father wants is death in droves death in numbers'! #honestly i think it's v reasonable to think that durge could've been tempted into bane worship given what little we know of them pre canon #anyway haven't played evil durge myself so very curious abt any insights from that route #baldur's gate

[crossdressingdeath]

Kyvir: Can you tell me the worst thing I ever did? Sceleritas Fel: There was one time you gave a beggar some coin while we were en route to the Devil's Fee. You didn't kick him or spit on him or anything! I was so shocked I almost fainted! I still have nightmares about it to this day. But I'm sure you only did so to lower the suspicions of the Flaming Fist. Surely?

Always fun when evil groups think good things are bad. But also I love how Sceleritas here makes it clear that pre-amnesia Durge wasn't just an avatar of evil and slaughter and cruelty! They gave money to a beggar on the street just because! Even better, he also offers a potential explanation for players who do want their Durge to have been Evil McEvil by saying "Oh, I'm sure you just did that to make the Fist less suspicious" (but Sceleritas clearly not believing it even as he says it allows players who want their Durge to have more depth to ignore it as him lying to himself). It's very good.

(Also given it was en route to the Devil's Fee Gortash was probably also there, I do wonder how he'd respond to that...)

#bg3 #sceleritas fel #durge

[edelgarfield]

I love your durge characterization. Like. Their soul slowly growing in to occupy their corpse. Literally standing there like 🧍🏻 as their brain just spews horror at them. The scene where everyone mind melds and the gang is all horrified by the depths of their self loathing and they cannot understand why rlly rlly got me. None of them are equipped to deal w one another’s trauma but they want to, so badly, and it’s one of the things I rlly like abt the group dynamic and I loved the way you wrote it. Also astarion’s flashbacks were absolutely awful and devastating (complimentary, but I am brandishing a stick at you). You also captured the inherent grim hilarity of having an evil butler that encourages your violent intrusive thoughts. Like wow this day can’t get any worse [a little freak scampers up and tells you to disembowel your close friends and companions] fuck’s sake.

thank you so much!

it's funny you talk about their soul growing in bc I have Thoughts on that & plans for future fics that I hope to get to. but the short version is because of the circumstances around durge's creation i don't think they'd be made with a soul. like. why would they. they're supposed to be daddy's murderbot why would he give them free will. idk how souls work in the forgotten realms but if mindflayers don't have them i think it makes sense that durge might not either.

the group sees durge as confident & unflappable. they don't emote a lot bc they're constantly keeping the urge in check so they just assume durge is as stoic on the inside as they are on the outside. so getting in their head and seeing how much self-loathing they have just completely blindsides them. you find out the person you've been using for emotional support this whole time actually desperately needs it themselves. also i think their response just totally catches everyone off guard. like they have 6 people telling them "we think you're a good person" and they're just like "no, you're wrong." and then proceeds to get angry about it which is like. what do you do with that? durge is so convinced in their own badness that nothing can sway them otherwise which is like. trying to argue with a brick wall.

they are trying their best!! they care abt each other so much but no one taught them emotional regulation or healthy coping mechanisms so they're just throwing darts at the wall and hoping they don't accidentally poke someone's eye out

IM GLAD YOU "LIKE" ASTARION'S FLASHBACKS they're awful and uncomfortable i think it parallels the Urges. they both get uncontrollable visceral upsetting thoughts. they are both Mentally Ill just one is a magic mental illness.

sjkdlfjkdlsfj you are so right abt sceleritas fel every time durge is like "god damn it not this fucker again" also like the line abt him running all over the place to find durge is taken straight from the game so does that mean he's physically following you every where. solo campaign where you're just sceleritas fel trying to follow your master as they keep getting sucked dry by the vampire

#hilda talks to people #Anonymous