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#and for astarion still being nervous about his boundaries being pushed
everchased · 6 months
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hahahahaaaa get safe and cared for, idiot
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amica-aenigmata-naboo · 5 months
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Endlessly
Astarion x plus size! Y/N - drabble - 1.3K WC NSFW 18+
Masterlist
Warnings: insecurities, yelling, self deprecation, fluff on fluff on fluff, Astarion being a big sap, loveeeeee
Part 2
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You and Astarion had been together for 8 bliss filled months. You knew you were in love with him the day he asked you to be his. Yet you never said it. He hadn’t said it either. Honestly, you were still amazed he was with you. You knew your size wasn’t perceived as conventionally attractive or desirable. It used to bother you, but you were quite comfortable in yourself now. Until it came to Astarion. It was like you were trying to hide any and all fat on your body when he was around. He had never made any negative remarks, quite the opposite actually. You just knew one day he would wake up and see through the honeyed fog of lust and find somebody who matched him. Somebody perfect, just like him. 
You watched as Karlach played in the stream, she had such a child-like wonder about her. It made you happy to just be in her presence. Shadowheart sat on the shore with you, meditating. Everyone else was back at camp. 
“Come on Y/N! Come play!” Karlach yelled, splashing a bit of water at you. 
You got up wading into the water up to your knees. Thankfully you wore shorts and a massively oversized top. You felt comfortable enough around everyone to be seen like this. You and Karlach flicked water at each other, finding rocks and shells to take back to camp. You talked about nothing and everything. Gale and Wyll made their way down, even Lae’zel. The weather was just too good to not enjoy your little beach. You didn’t see Astarion make his way down the hill. He walked up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist. You lurched forwards, not used to touching as you were still nervous about it - especially when he touches your waist/stomach. Your foot slipped on the soft mud beneath you, you fell forwards. You caught yourself, avoiding any injury but you were soaked. Your clothes clung to you, your body on full display. You scrambled up, crossing your arms over your torso. You pushed past Astarion as he held a hand out to you. You rushed up the hill and to your tent, stripping your clothes off. 
“Darling? May I come in?” Astarion said from the front of your tent.
“Not right now Star.” You tried hard to hide the waiver in your voice, or the subtle sniffles you were letting out. You layered on clothes, wanting to hide within yourself somehow. 
“Love…” he said, barely peeking inside.
“I said not now! Please just go away…” you yelled, sounding harsher than you intended. You laid on your bedroll, curling into yourself. You cried until you fell asleep, the moment earlier exhausting and overwhelming you. 
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Astarion backed away from your tent. He had never heard you yell before, much less at him. He racked his brain, not exactly sure what he did wrong. It clicked after a moment, he touched you. You two had never established boundaries verbally but you knew he was ok with touching. You, however, were only ok with light touches that didn’t really invade your person. Holding hands, a kiss, caressing your face - all things he had done before that you seemed to be happy with. But today, perhaps he had overstepped. When he saw you and your radiant smile, so full of joy to just exist in the moment looking for shells and splashing about with Karlach. He acted on instinct, without even properly thinking it through. He felt positively wretched. Out of everyone he understood most how awful it is to have physical boundaries crossed, and he crossed yours. He walked to his tent glumly. He would seek you out later, right now he wanted to give you the space you deserved. 
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You woke up later. The crickets outside chirped and you could hear the campfire crackling. You rubbed your eyes. A blanket had been thrown over you, a note was folded up on your table. You got up and snatched it. “Find me when you wake - A” You sighed, closing your eyes. The way you yelled at him echoed in your mind. You were flustered, you hadn’t meant for it to sound so mean. You peeled off your coat, feeling hot and constricted in all the layers you had piled on. You left your tent in a sweater and pants. You felt less anxious than you had earlier, knowing your campmates didn’t care what you looked like. All you cared about was that Astarion had touched your stomach, the spot you were most insecure about. You couldn’t act like it wasn’t there anymore, you had to face him. You willed back your misty eyes, preparing for the worst. You softly called his name outside of his tent, waiting for him to call you in. He did, and he looked just as nervous as you felt. Your stomach dropped but you tried not to show it.
You sat rather far from him, wanting to have space between you both. “I’m sorry I yelled at you.” you spoke first.
“I’m not worried about that darling… I am worried about the fact that I hurt you.” he spoke softly but you could hear the guilt in his tone.
You looked at him, confusion dripping from your face. “I wasn’t thinking… and I know that isn’t an excuse, but I’m sorry I crossed your boundary. It won't happen again… that being said, we need to have a talk.”
Your blood ran cold, a cold sweat covering your back. This was it. You nodded stoically, convincing yourself not to cry. 
“I would like to know where you are comfortable with me touching you. I, personally, am comfortable with you touching me wherever, whenever.” he smiled at you gently, a simple twitch up the corners of his mouth.
Well… this is not where you thought the conversation was going. “I…” you tried to collect your thoughts, “I do like your touch. I want you to know that. I love it, in fact. What happened earlier wasn’t anything to do with you, I just…” you paused, unsure if you should even tell him. 
He looked at you with his big pleading eyes, you had to tell him or this wall would intrude upon your relationship.
“I am insecure about my… size… my weight. I know you have had many diviner conquests, and you yourself are a vision… I just… I don’t know… I don’t want to disappoint y-” you were cut off by his lips melding into yours. They were soft but you could feel a fire behind them. 
“Respectfully, darling, shut up.” he kissed you again, deeply. As if trying to convey a multitude of feelings at once. “You are perfect. And you are not a conquest, you are the one I…” he paused, his eyes flicking between yours before he spoke again. “You are the one I love. And I love all of you.”
You were shocked, you were sure you felt everything about your relationship deeper than he did. And yet, here he was saying he loves you. “I love you… I’m so sorry about this whole thing.” you scooted closer to him, reaching for his hand. 
“Don’t be sorry. I understand insecurities, nasty little thoughts that cannibalize you from within.” he cupped your cheek, “You have nothing to worry about. You are perfect, I love everything about you.” 
He sounded so sincere you couldn’t help but tear up. “Can we… work on expanding my boundaries? I want to touch you, and have you touch me… I just need some time to get comfortable. Get out of my head, ya know?” you asked, picking at your nails. You hadn’t talked about intimacy with anyone else before, not like this. 
“Of course little love… we’ll go at your pace. Honestly, I’m excited to do this with you.” he smiled, his fangs making an appearance. “I love you, endlessly.” he said as he kissed your cheeks before landing on your lips. The kiss was sweet, almost like it was sealing a promise.
“I love you, endlessly.” you spoke on his lips before connecting your mouths once again.
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Naboo's Note:
Hello! I hope everyone enjoys, I haven't seen too many plus size reader inserts with Astarion so here is my shot at it. As a plus size person I think this kind of representation is important and very validating. Post again soon, love you guys!! Thanks for all the likes, comments, reblogs, and requests!! XOXOXOXO
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ofstardustanddreaming · 2 months
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inexperienced relationships
preference summary: inexperienced reader with companions
content warnings: none
fandom: baldur's gate 3
characters: astarion, wyll, halsin
gender neutral reader
anon request
a.n. - i'm so sorry this is coming so late! it's been a busy month.
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Astarion: He leans toward the idea that not every first has to be really special, where you have to convince him that some of these firsts are important to you. He'll be a little dramatic about the importance to you, but I think some of it comes from his trauma, where he wishes that he could have some of his firsts back as well. It might be a bit of an emotional wall, a bit jealous you could experience them still, while some dramatics probably just come from his personality. (You could mention the idea that he could take his time and try to reclaim his firsts through experiences with you as well.) But he comes around to your firsts being important, instead of pestering you all the time for a kiss. He'll take your firsts into consideration and he comes into realization how he felt heard, and how much he loves experiencing his firsts under a different light as well.
Wyll: He's a sweetheart when it comes to being your first in a lot of aspects when it comes to relationships. He takes the relationship at the pace you would like and it made you feel listened to. He's the kind of person who wouldn't push your boundaries, always willing to take it the pace you'd like. He would try to plan ahead for a lot of those firsts, wanting to engage in something that makes sense for you. Such as planning a picnic to set up for a first kiss, and making sure the theme is on point. Although, even though he makes sure you have your boundaries and wouldn't go beyond them, he likes to be a bit of a tease. He always kisses the corner of your mouth, or anywhere on your face but your lips, wanting you to be the one to initiate your first kiss. He always makes sure you don't feel uncomfortable, but loves to be a bit of a tease always.
Halsin: He is considerate, and he's someone who is willing to wait. He's been around for a while, he's willing to wait a little while longer for you. He's sweet, always putting in thought to what to do with your firsts. He's done a lot, so he likes to take this chance to really dwell on what he liked, and tries to apply what he learned to your relationship. He tends to be so slow though when it comes to engaging with your firsts, not wanting to rush you, it's such an opposite to the teasing ways of Wyll. It made you feel nervous about engaging in something such as a kiss, fearing he didn't want to wait for you and had changed his mind. Sometimes you just have to nudge him a bit, hinting that you're ready, and he'll start the process of the romantic plans he had to engage in the sweet situations of your firsts.
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