#and my parents told my extended family and im on vacation with said family rn and I've noticed a dynamic shift since we arrived

[brad-bakshi-loves-bugs]

my biggest theory for brad is that, even when the rest of mq inevitably realizes what's going on with him and try to help (namely david for obvious reasons, dana because she's so far one of the few good people in the office, and cw because him and brad have been shown to have a closer friendship than most), he's not even going to realize it.

because brad is clearly used to being seen as the bad guy, an evil person, so the idea that anyone might show him compassion isn't even on his radar. he's not looking for help, so he doesn't expect to receive it, so when he does receive it he never even notices. people tend to not notice the completely unexpected, after all.

it's going to be little things, too. his coworkers making more of an effort to talk to him casually. maybe carol even organizes some office parties and morale-boosting days like therapy dog visits. (my dad's office brings therapy dogs in a couple times a month just to hang out and destress the employees. mythic quest isn't a great place to work, but maybe as people start to become more self aware they'll try to be better.) dana brings him lunch every day, and every day brad gets annoyed because he doesn't eat lunch, but sometimes it's his favorite food or something he's craving in that moment and he can't help but nibble at it. sometimes he doesnt even hate himself or make himself sick after he does, either.

it'll be david bringing him chinese takeout half the times he visits brad's apartment and showing brad all of his favorite shows and movies. most of them are romcoms, and brad isn't a fan, but david pays attention to what he seems to like (dark comedy and slasher films, of course) and makes an effort to watch more of brad's favorite genres. david hates horror and slasher movies, but he asks jo to keep him up to date on new ones being released and give him recommendations. jo, of course, does it because she KNOWS david hates it, so she always recommends the goriest, scariest ones, because she knows david will be squeamish over it. she doesnt know that brad is even watching them, and especially not that he's enjoying all of her indirect recommendations. she doesnt need to know.

brad isn't ignorant. he can tell when the mood shifts in a room, when he's receiving more attention than before. but it isn't for several months before he realizes what's going on, and at first everything comes crashing down around him and he breaks because he never wanted this. never wanted to be exposed and vulnerable without even realizing it. he never wanted people to see him as someone worth saving.

but his coworkers don't give him much of a choice but to go along with it. hell, even ian has stopped speaking over him and shutting him down as often as he used to, because ian can clearly see brad's worth to the company and he'd really like to avoid another casino fiasco, thank you very much. he knows that brad dying might be a bit harsher of a blow to the company than him taking a day off out of spite. well, probably, at least.

so, as horrified and disgusted and weak and patronized as brad felt when he first discovered the new dynamic his coworkers had with him, he can't help but start to enjoy it. he finally feels heard, and he's getting more of what he wants when he wants it. poppy hasn't called him a soulless money-suck in a long time (although part of him thought it was a pretty cool title), and david's stopped pestering him about donating more to charity. and brad's still, well, somewhat of a sociopath, so he takes advantage of how much more lenient everyone now is with him.

everyone else thinks brad is coming around to having people give a shit about him. in reality, he's fully embraced being able to get away with pretty much anything. because he's brad bakshi, and he needs to have some greater, nefarious purpose to accept help or compassion. and taking advantage of others is an easy justification for why he would ever accept help (or. well. acceptance). that's his excuse, anyway.

it'll be a long time before he admits that he actually sort of enjoyed the new attention, appreciated the sympathy the others now extend toward him.

but he will never, never admit that they've saved his life, no matter how many times they do.

#mythic quest #brad bakshi #we are fleeting we are feeling #wafwaf #fanfiction #david brittlesbee #dana mythic quest #ian grimm #poppy li #cw longbottom #headcanon #carol mythic quest #look okay I know this is a long one #but hear me out #brad is the opposite of naive however. people don't tend to notice things they aren't looking for #and he's certainly not looking for sympathy #this is all based in part because a couple weeks ago I went to a psych ward on a 1013 (meaning I was a risk to myself) #and my parents told my extended family and im on vacation with said family rn and I've noticed a dynamic shift since we arrived #and its not BAD but the only reason I've noticed is because I know they know about what happened and I know they love me #so like. I expected this #brad on the other hand would NOT #so im playing around with that difference and what brad would do in shoes similar to mine that just don't quite fit #im happy with this though #tay rambles