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#anyway. i'm not gonna give a full commentary here but a big reason why i chose this song is that the narrator
autisticandroids · 7 months
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FAMINE: That's one deep, dark nothing you've got there, Dean.
[youtube with closed captions]
dean and his father. dean and his family. dean and how bad it is.
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(via @closetoyou1970)
#spn#vid#mind the warnings on this one for real#woe! fruit of my rewatch be upon ye.#pallas calls this my 'deangirl coming out vid' which honestly. true. but those who paid attention know i've always been a deangirl.#also. after this no more deanwinchester rilo kiley amvs I Pwomise#anyway. i'm not gonna give a full commentary here but a big reason why i chose this song is that the narrator#is essentially dismissing her own problems and instead watching the problems of someone else#and i kind of wanted to play with that theme. this is the parallels show so let's do some parallels. lots of things happen to characters#that are Like Dean somehow. either in personality or circumstance. that we know or can infer happen to him. but we don't see it bc it's#not sayable. not speakable. so like for an easy one. we see meg being tortured in caged heat. she also talks about apprenticing under#alastair just like dean. so i show her being tortured [in a way that is sexualized and demon-specific] and reacting how she does#because i invite the audience to imagine or interpret that this has also happened to dean at some point. we just don't see it#so there are many dean parallels in this video. some obvious. some subtle but textual. some products of my twisted mind. but that's the way#i am using them to make my argument.#oh also: dean voice sam's eyes going black is JUST like when he used to fight with dad and wouldn't listen to me when i told him not to.#i guess also the point is that because it's unsayable. dean can't say it. dean can't even acknowledge it. and so it bleeds through#into everything in his life#that's why it's important that the song narrator doesn't take her own problems seriously. dean doesn't either.
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machineryfield · 3 years
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At the Start of the World Chapter 2
Heading Out
--
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Fiora sits on the bench at Outlook Park, staring out at the Colony. Just a day ago it had been so peaceful, the threat of Mechon becoming more and more of a distant dream... But, like most good things, that had to come to an end.
She closes her eyes, remembering the scenes that had played out before her. People being eaten, Shulk being eaten. Stabbed cleanly through by that Mechon with a face before smaller ones descended on his body.
She remembers the cold rage that had seeped into her, the way she had finally found a weak point on the blaster armour of that thing and let the Monado cut deep...
The Monado feels so heavy on her back when Reyn approaches, and she forces herself to give him a smile when he sits next to her. "Hey."
"Hey," he doesn't even attempt to pretend to smile. "You doin' alright? I know you and Dunban went home last night... He say anythin'?"
"He tried to comfort me." She admits. "...It didn't really help, though. He just said what I expected him to say, really."
Words of moving forward, like Shulk would want. Firm looks and with an underlying insistence she returns the Monado to the Weapons Development Lab as soon as possible in his tone. She thinks of all he said and frowns. She decided then and there she wouldn't listen to him...
"I want to go out and find that Mechon," she says. "I want to make it pay for what it did to Shulk, and I want to understand why."
"Understand why?" Reyn frowns. "I don't get it..."
"I want to know why the Mechon attacked us, why they’re always attacking us, what made us their targets. I want to know why... why they eat us. Do they need to, or do they just take pleasure in it? Things like that..." She wrings her hands together. "But a piece of me just wants to make the Mechon pay. Not take the time to learn, as much as the questions eat at me."
"Sounds like that piece of you is me rubbin' off on ya,” Reyn rubs under his nose. "...If ya got that, I guess I should be the one to keep you on your path to learnin', right?"
"That piece of me is loud, just like you!" She giggles, before looking over at him. "Really? You're willing to let me try and find out why? Even though you just want to..."
"You're my friend, Fiora. You've got your reasons for wantin' to know, and 'sides, if we know, might be easier to take 'em down!" He nods with a grin. "So let's do this, yeah?"
She smiles and nods. "Yeah...!"
"So," he kicks his legs. "Guess we're not tellin' Dunban, yeah?"
"Yeah." She frowns. "He'd just try to stop me... We head out, just the two of us, tonight."
Reyn nods. "You got it, I'll meet ya at the entrance."
--
"Ready to go?" She asks, fixing the pack at her side.
She goes over all she has. Food for a few days, her knives in case she needs them, and the Monado. Not much, but enough to get them through Tephra Cave and the Bionis leg, at least. They could stock up at Colony 6.
"Yep." Reyn rolls his arm and smiles at her. "The Mechon won't know what hit 'em."
"Yeah," she nods. "First we go to Colony 6, then we head for Sword Valley. If we're gonna find that Mechon anywhere, it'll be there."
"Galahad Fortress," Reyn adds on. "If there's still Mechon, the fortress is probably still there. Buildin' up grunts for a year, I bet."
"Yeah, something like that." She cracks her neck and looks out towards the path towards Tephra Cave. This time, it'd just be the two of them. "Let's go, Reyn."
--
Fiora sees the door open towards Colony 6, once locked, and figures that's where the strange machines they fought earlier came from. She wonders, they showed up right before the Mechon.... Had they sensed the threat? Activated for that?
She shrugs off that thought, at least for now. Whatever those machines were, they were gone now. They could move forward without a problem, right? They just needed to get to Colony 6.
"You know," Reyn speaks, pulling Fiora out of her thoughts. "We haven't had any convoys from Colony 6 recently, have we? Y'think the Mechon got 'em, too...?"
Fiora frowns as they make it to the lit path. "I hope not. Maybe they just got delayed, or it was bad harvests this year."
She doesn't believe what she says, but she continues to hope, anyway. Maybe they did die, but maybe to natural wildlife. It was never fun to lose any of the few Homs they had left, but better to beings of the Bionis than the Mechon.
Reyn nods, frowning. "Sorry, I didn't mean t'..."
"Don't worry about it," she gives him a small smile. "I get the worry, really. We just... have to try and look on the bright side."
"Yeah... you're right."
They continue on their way for a while, fighting off the wild life and picking up knick knacks from the ground. It's going well, she thinks. Maybe too well... She doesn't like thinking that, but dread sits in her stomach as they walk along. What was this feeling...?
She tries to shake it off, at least, until they see dead bodies ahead of them. She feels panic wrack her body as they move towards them. Reyn is there first, looking them over with a grimace.
"Was it the Mechon...?" She asks as she approaches, voice shaking."
Reyn shakes his head, "looks like Arachno wounds, if y'ask me. Probably got ambushed on their way to Colony 9..."
Fiora frowns, she knows how Reyn feels about spiders and their bigger monstrous cousins. She moves to his side and places a hand on his shoulder. "Come on, there's some water, let's return them to the Bionis, then rest. We should think about our next move first if there are Arachnos ahead."
Reyn nods, clearly thankful for the idea. "Yeah. Let's do it."
Fiora's thankful that she and Reyn are both pretty athletic, all things given. It makes moving the remnants of the Caravan easier. There's not enough for it to have been the full group, and as bad as it sounds, Fiora is glad. That's less death they have to see right after what happened.
The bodies start to dissolve the minute they touch the water, and Fiora offers a quick prayer to the Bionis. Born of the Bionis and returned to it, the way Shulk didn't get to be.
She swallows down the bitter thought and turns to Reyn. "Come on, let's get some rest. You first, I'll take point."
--
A giant Arachno, Reyn surrounded by smaller ones. There's no where for him to run and Fiora isn't with him. She watches as it strikes out, he moves to block it, and dread settles in as it gives out. She watches the Arachno stab right through his chest. Watches him die, just like Shulk did.
Fiora blinks back to reality and sees Reyn walking towards her. "Your turn to rest."
"Reyn," she stands, shaky on her feet as she moves to him. "Are you okay?"
"'Course I am." He frowns, scratching his cheek. "Well, couldn't sleep a wink, but I feel alright. You look like you just saw a ghost, though."
"I..." She bites her lip. "I had another vision. Promise me you'll stay safe if I sleep?"
Reyn pats her back. "'Course I will, Fiora. We just lost Shulk, I ain't lettin' you lose me, too."
"Reyn..." She sighs and rests her head against his chest for a minute, tears pricking at her eyes. "You better stay safe, you big dummy."
He squeezes her into a tight hug then, a smile on his face. "Don't you worry about me! I can take a few hits... and if I need ya, I'll wake ya up, okay?"
"You better," she looks up at him. "No running off to play hero. No doing what Shulk did."
"None of that, promise."
--
It's foggy in Fiora's dream, she can barely make out where she is. It's a platform of some sort, that much she can make out. Looking around, she comes to realize she's high above some sort of water source…
There's not much else she can see, save a man in the distance. She squints, trying to get a better look at him and takes a step forward. He seems to realize she's there, but doesn't turn to greet her. He keeps his back to her, simply tilts his head back a bit.
"Quite the divergence, wouldn't you say? I wouldn't think the Heir to the Monado would fall like that." He says, voice sounding quite sad. "But now you are here, to take on that heavy title."
"Heir to the Monado..." She furrows her brow and doesn't even understand why she asks what she does. "Do you mean Shulk?"
He was the miracle child, after all. Found alive when everyone else from his colony -- pushing forward on an expedition to find any way to stay alive -- perished to the cold of Valak Mountain. The little boy, sleeping next to the mythical sword that saved the day so many times.
The man chuckles, and does not answer her. "I look forward to seeing what you'll do, now thrust into his place. I'm sure you'll make him proud, Fiora."
"How do you know my name?" She asks, stepping forward once again. "Who are you? What do you know about the Monado?!"
"All will be revealed in due time." He assures, but Fiora still feels unsettled. "Do your best, now, I'll be watching."
She opens her mouth and sits up from where she fell asleep, panting as sweat rolls down her brow. She turns to see if Reyn noticed, see if he has commentary for her, and her blood runs cold.
Reyn isn't there.
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