#asto vs the archives

[astranauticus]

im not sure if this is a bug or a feature but like when the entities have to manifest like actual concrete powers for their avatars sometimes it just comes out slightly silly like the desolation people are all just. good at arson. peter lukas is just a Guy who can turn invisible sometimes. jon occasionally gets random useless trivia put in his head. hysterical

#asto vs the archives #i say sometimes because the way the hunt manifests for daisy is actually kind of unnerving #julia and trevor tho theyre funny #just having a jolly good time #also theres something really funny to me specifically about the dark avatars like #the dark is the closest thing to like. if i were marked by an entity irl this would be it #the dark or the spiral #but the dark avatars are always like. well idk theyre just kinda there?? #idk i guess the way the dark is scary doesnt really require like. human input #like the statement about the guy who has to hide under his blanket from the dark blob every night? thats scary but no humans were involved #and like nikola orsinov or michael distortion or even jared hopworth get the benefit of very clearly being Something Else #but the dark avatars are always.... obviously and unfortunately human #like manuela dominguez does her sermon and im just like mam this is a wendys

[astranauticus]

ok i take it back MAG34 is officially my fav episode now i was so very nearly a biology major and this monster concept like Not Humans who join an anat class to learn how to physically construct themselves is SO delicious to me. also the entries with jon actl talking to someone else are always my favourite and i love the 'well this is patently insane but i guess this is happening now' vibe of this professor. 'oh good lord that's-' 'deeply unpleasant yes!!' is SENDING me

#asto speaks #asto vs the archives #new tma liveblogging tag! #the bit where the guy was like 'well if they're messing with their hearts i can't see or hear it so no news is good news i guess' #almost made me laugh out loud bc that probably would've been my exact train of thought in that situation #i LOVE his vibe so much like i KNOW this is insane but it's clearly happening so let's just work with what we've got! #'you can.. keep it if you like' 'we do NOT want it' also killed me #not a big fan of teeth shit tho so that ending was. oh well #yeah of course they're not gonna let me get too comfortable HFHSVFGSVDV

[astranauticus]

'he manages to pull himself out of the coffin like a grubby jesus!' i LOVE peter lukas

#asto vs the archives

[astranauticus]

havent done my tma liveblogging in a while but im at MAG128 and when jon tells 1/2 breekon n hope to drop the cockney accent and he switches to that horrendous russian accent and jon just kinda mutters 'christ that's worse' i almost laughed OUT LOUD in my school library

(also i think i said this before but i LOVE the detail of each entity's avatars affecting the tapes in different ways like jon vs michael distortion vs peter lukas all create static on the tapes but its completely different sounding static i love it)

#asto vs the archives

[astranauticus]

aw. i'm gonna miss michael

i love helen's voice tho

#asto vs the archives

[astranauticus]

god i love nikola orsinov so so much

#asto vs the archives #took a few days break then just read the transcripts for a bit but i figured i *have* to listen to mag101 #no regrets i LOVE NIKOLA'S VOICE SO MUCH #'well then move YOURSELVES away' #also love breekon and hope the way they talk is so fun #also speaking of mag101 i dont rmb which statement when jon describes michael as 'laughs like a headache' but god thats a good descrpition

[astranauticus]

MAG81-87

i love every single part of Jon and Georgie's conversation but she has a CAT called THE ADMIRAL THATS ADORABLE

WHAT is UP with elias on my god. him giving """"daisy's statement"""" while daisy is right there is SO unsettling

ok love the idea of martin doing the statements while jon is away but specifically like the way jon delivers some of the post statement followups was always one of the things i found the most unsettling about this show (the one s1 episode about the arachnophobe whose corpse was found 'covered in web' stuck with me for 2 years. what the hell) so martin delivering his read of the followup in this tone of '???? ew?? i guess???' is so goddamn funny

'archival prisoner' tim?? u good???

ok well if the stranger's deal didnt tend to be so gross it would be SO my aesthetic (looks at my wooden puppet theatre troupe wip)

anyway gonna take a bit of a break cuz my sleep is uhhhhh not doing so great!

#asto vs the archives #i am losing. #i mean that was always the joke with that tag bc my first experience with this podcast was it severely fucking up my sleep for 2 days #its happening again! goddamn #like i said im not really a horror person. ironically #funny story the bed in my dorm faces my door where theres a few hooks for hanging stuff #and id always hung my jackets on there but last night i realised from the bed like in low light the jacket kinda looks like #a person standing in front of my door #yeah. i hang my jacket in the cupboard now

[astranauticus]

MAG71-80

what on earth is with the lady from mag71 like nobody just shows up at the magnus institute of all places being like hey here's a yarn. goodbye

the setup of mag72 is so fucked but the idea of a takeaway with a sign that just says 'FOOD' is SENDING me

'like i didnt want my last thoughts on earth to be lowkey racist' fucking wheezing this has got to be the FUNNIEST way for that orientalism content warning to pan out

'yes i know what a meme is' brb CRYING

damn this whole sasha conversation wouldve been so much easier if jon wasnt so good at antagonising people DJFHKSJDHFKJHDS

ok but shouting match aside 'is that another sasha? are you collecting them??' why are all of jon and melanies interactions this specific brand of unhinged

somehow the turn of phrase 'travel freely, sowing random terror' is sending me. i too would like to sow random terror

'if i had a nervous breakdown and i just misremembered a cousin i dont know well it couldve been a lot worse' is such a FUNNY train of thought

'it is remarkably easy to buy an axe in central london' ???

i fucking LOVE michael so much

'what are you doing here??' 'probably watching the archivist die :)' PLS

honestly this exchange is even funnier in text form

kinda cool how both michael and notsasha fuck up the tapes but in different ways

'i was almost beaten to death by an angry goth!' that is the FUNNIEST possible way to phrase that sentence

'we dont have time for you to have a breakdown archivist!' oof

...wanted to see how the transcript described leitner's death bc i couldnt figure out what the noises were for a second and shoutout to the transcript for this hysterical phrasing

#asto vs the archives #season 2 down! #what the FUCK was that ending

[astranauticus]

MAG61-70

'i'll break every bone in your body :|' oh i love daisy's vibe already

when jon said 'looks like we're not done with sinister coffins just yet' i seriously thought he was gonna say 'looks like we're not done with the police' KJDFHKSJHDKJFH

also 'when a precinct finds a vampire they call me to drive them out the forest and set them on fire' i LOVE daisy's vibe

what the fuck is this dynamic between gertrude and mary kaey im losing my mind

'who... is this' 'that's a surprise!' bro

why do all these end guys like the mummy from mag64 feel less like horror stories and more like tragedies. just these really pathetic creatures trying very hard to die :(

as a CS major i dont know how i feel about mag65

mag67 another one that reads more like a tragedy than a horror story :( anyway i think i know enough spoilers to guess why they called out the movie they watched as specifically the prestige (genuinely one of my fav movies of all time) but im just gonna put a pin in that until agnes comes back again in the podcast

was listening to mag69 (one of the arachnophobia ones) halfway while on the bus back to my dorm and a moth flew into the bus. atmospheric 👍

'i should just leave it but i can't... not know' i mean i know what this man's problem is but damn this man has a problem

'deep down both of you know that you don't actually like each other but it's just more effort to not be friends' help why does this perfectly describe me and a guy at my school

#asto vs the archives #cuz i saw a wiki article i think talking about how agnes was like #created to be sacrificed for some sort of ritual? anyway #the final twist of the prestige is that there's this magician character who's been performing a disappearing man trick by cloning himself #then dropping the clone in a water tank underneath the stage #anyway. creatures created just to die and all that. yeah #the rest of the movies a lot of deceptions and mind games which isn't exactly the vibe here #although i guess that's all very web energy so that's why agnes wasn't watching (?) #re: the guy at my school we had to work together while helping out at a school event and it's one of those like #you're supposed to make friends and bond kinda events and i did make friends but me and him just had like #exactly opposite personalities or something we were just REALLY good at getting under each others skin #he's also absolutely convinced i have a crush on a mutual friend and it's one of those #both of us know what he's thinking but until he says something in those exact words i can't say anything or else it'll just be more weird? #the number of times ive wanted to grab him by the collar and yell 'NO i DONT fancy him can you stop NEEDLING me about it' in his face #he's *extremely* like cishet neurotypical standard issue guy you know the vibe

[astranauticus]

MAG51-60

MAG41-50 (for my own navigation cuz tumblr ate my post)

'asking (sasha) to produce said boyfriend' i LAUGHED

‘all in all he’s a delightful person to discuss money laundering with!’ the energy of this man is sending me

'he seemed determined to avoid eye contact [...] but i have a cousin with autism so' YES THANK YOU (<- eye contact anxiety haver)

ok im probably just gonna be reading instead of listening to all the.. bug n worm episodes for a bit (shoutout to the tma wiki content warning page) especially since i got to MAG55 when i just started eating dinner but also '(the police) might not look too kindly on me setting a man alight' i wheezed

'i am far too unlucky for (the person made of spiders) to simply be an old tramp hallucination' wow jon is becoming genre aware

knowing what i know about how this show ends why is jon so mean to martin good lord

#asto vs the archives #i dont really have a.. specific problem with bug n worms exactly? at least not irl its just that the way this show portrays them is #idk. really specifically good at getting under my skin (hah) for some reason #like the more conceptual(?) fears like the vast the lonely or the spiral dont really get to me all that much #and violence/body horror like the flesh or the slaughter is.. tolerable since this is an audio format so i dont *see* it #but the bug stuff.. idk its so visceral #its really just mag36 that *really* got to me for some reason like that one bothered me even more than jane prentiss did

[astranauticus]

MAG41-50

'i am not a brave man, but i am in some cases a very stubborn man' i LAUGHED

Jon's paranoia in the supplements is gonna drive me insane

(from mag41) 'encore?' 'i have an uncomfortable feeling she might have finally gotten that video to work' horror involving single lines that just Fuck You Up my beloved

'they only got away with significant mental trauma!' i- ????

ok the corruption is my least favourite entity and i live in SEA ie mosquito country so yeah mag45 was the first one i chose to read the transcript of instead of actually listen to. not gonna bother even trying to put up with that one

for some weird reason when michael started talking in mag47 i was CONVINCED the voice was jane prentiss for one confused second

ok but if michael is gonna be like any form of recurring antagonist i am. SO MUCH more down for that than the fucking worm lady like i love everything about this guy. the distorted effect on the tape. the cadence of his voice. 'does your hand in any way own your stomach' idk thats just a very fun line. 'let her go!' 'he he he no????' fuckin. hysterical line delivery 10/10

i listened to the first half of season 1 like fully 2 years ago now (its funny cuz i started tma literally the day the last episode came out) so some of the references jon makes to previous statements are very,,, ????? anyway thank god for the wiki i guess

TIM THINKING JON AND BASIRA ARE DATING I AM WHEEZING

#asto vs the archives #speaking of single lines that fuck you up horror did i ever mention that i fucking LOVE the 9 billion names of god #space/cosmic horror my beloved! the one genre of horror im best able to tolerate #in other news i took a whos avatar would you be quiz out of curiosity bc i was bored in class and got the stranger and like #i was not really expecting like. accuracy? but man that tracks to like a distressing degree #pretty sure i said on record at some point that not being recognised by ex classmates i dont like is like #such an incredibly *powerful* feeling for me #genuinely its probably just cuz of the whole trans thing but the idea of wearing different identities like skins? my kinda vibe #also (points to my post about the anatomy students) yeah #i mean fuck my deadname may as well be the local version of john doe like a placeholder name LOL it's so fuckin common

[astranauticus]

MAG35-40:

MAG41-50 (for my own navigation cuz tumblr ate my post)

the ending of mag35 was such an emotional roller coaster bc jon yelling about the worm made me physically jump in the lecture theatre while waiting for class to start (so thanks jonny sims) but also 'stay safe' '....i'll try????' is SO funny to me for some reason

as someone who definitely has memory problems (from what i have no idea) mag38 hits... alarmingly close to home bc i've gone down that exact 'i have this thing don't i??? where the fuck is it?? am i just hallucinating?? making up memories???? what the fuck????' train of thought so many times in my life

'maybe he'd just left me. maybe he'd just escape with a divorce' man this show can sure be surprisingly heartbreaking at times

the idea of martin deworming jon with a corkscrew made me realise i am SO lucky this is a podcast so i don't actually have to see that image

'funny story really! i ran into the office, worms everywhere, horrible death and everything' my good sir what?????

'can you walk jon?' 'oh i can limp' ive heard some variation of this joke so many times and it sends me every single time for some reason

im a bit too spoilered so i think i know what happened to sasha and im so not happy about any of this. but also her voice literally sounds different between mag39 and mag40 what the fuck????

#asto vs the archives #maybe this is just where/how i grew up but i still got a little 'oh! (complimentary)' when the mag38 statement giver said my husband #and then the escaped w a divorce line hit me like a truck :) #anyw jon is right given everything about the institute getting shot is probably the single most unsettling way for gertrude robinson to die

[astranauticus]

finally giving the magnus archives another go after the first few episodes i binged gave me the weirdest nights sleep i've ever had and a. listened to MAG31 and now i Understand. yup that's Finbar alright b. no thoughts head empty only MAG32. in LOVE with this writing style and voice acting

#asto speaks #i did that thing to myself where i convince myself im not gonna watch a thing but im still curious so i go look up spoilers #but then i actually DO watch the thing so now i'm just. full of spoilers #genuinely losing my mind over MAG32 i HATE IT WHY IS IT SO GOOD #like the actual statement aside i'm just losing over the 😦 in jon's voice when he says 'statement of jane prentiss' #it's almost funny if it wasn't so anxiety inducing #anyway yeah literally could not think of anything besides my finbar horror encounter when listening to mag31 so that was. incredibly wild #asto vs the archives

[astranauticus]

wow im so close to finishing the whole show but like, martin's deadpan delivery of 'shocker, i have self-esteem issues, not the point' just made me laugh out loud in public

#asto vs the archive #wheezed out loud while camping in the canteen

[astranauticus]

had the thought 'if i had a domain what would it be like' and my brain helpfully supplied 'kafka's metamorphosis' JDSFHKSHDKFJHS

#asto vs the archive #or like that one lovecraft short story about the guy stuck in a dungeon who crawls out and everyones scare of him #cuz somewhere along the way he somehow turned into gollum #just a big house party with all your friends and loved ones but they dont recognise you and find you unpleasant and off putting #and when you look in a reflective surface you realise its because you arent you anymore #to be clear this is the domain id have not the domain id be trapped in #the domain id be trapped in is whatever the adult version of night street is #that or being stuck inside your own house and the lights dont work and there is *something* in your house that shouldnt be in your house #<- an ACTUAL short story idea ive tried to write SO MANY TIMES into a larger concept ive been spinning for like upwards of a year #but every time i tried to think about it for too long at night it uh. does not do good things to my brain #funny cuz i love putting my irl bad vibes into my stories so its interesting to find out theres a hard limit to that

[astranauticus]

obsessed with mikaele salesa's vibe. yeah annabelle cane showed up to my house one day and says she's gonna stay here now and i can't get rid of her so i just hope she's not destroying anything i guess

#asto vs the archive