#bc getting sick and dropping out of school ☹ being stuck in toxic friend groups and never having proper teenage experiences ☹

[kkujo]

school is so weird... you see the same people in the same building five days a week for the best part of a decade and even if you're not friends you know their names and faces... and then one day school ends and you just. leave. and never see most of them again ☹

#thinking about all the people who touched my life who i'll never see again #wondering about my impact #do people ever think about me #the guy who would play chess with me at lunch when my friend group started excluding me.. #the girl who came and sat with me at prom to watch the firework display even though we'd never spoken before because i was sitting alone.. #the way people impact you and then they're just gone forever. sickening #but people are kind and good. like. i have faith in humanity #there were mean people too obviously but. there's always kindness #anyways just thinking about that. like. the people i grew up with. i wasn't friends with most of them but we watched each other grow #some of the people in my class had been in the same classes as me since we were 4 ☹ and then one day you're grown up and they're gone #that prom thing was important to me tho bc prom night was literally the last time i saw everyone #bc i finished my exams the week before so. aside from going in to pick up my results #prom night was the last time everyone in my year was together ☹☹ and then i just never saw anyone again #i hated school but i miss it so much. most confusing nostalgia ever #i didn't want to be there and i was so happy when i finished and i wouldn't go back if i could #but it hurts bc i missed out on so many experiences and just being around people.. i miss it #starting college (uk college not university) in september so maybe i'll be able to heal a bit #bc getting sick and dropping out of school ☹ being stuck in toxic friend groups and never having proper teenage experiences ☹ #kinda fucked me up i'm ngl ☹ #(no surprises by radiohead playing) no it's fine. it's fine #the way you spend so long in one place... with the same people... and then it's just gone. fuck 🤦‍♀️ #even if you didn't like the place or the people... it aches in such a weird way omg.. #i literally couldn't drive past my school for a bit bc. i used to get up at 7am & go there every day. and now i don't. does this make sense #ok to rb