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youwantedavillain · 1 year

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The Hidden Player in all of This (The Stalker)

Though this seems irrelevant it actually is very much important to the whole of my story. It is tied to @felicitythekittycat and her little posse of equally toxic individuals. They all knew about the stalker and how stretched thin I was due to his incessant pestering. To be honest I think my blood was already in the water the moment I was first snapped at by @trainerreva thanks to Kronostitan100.

The best way I can describe how I feel about the guy is: a disgusting combination of repulsion and regret. Like agreeing to a dare of eating your own vomit.

Here is a tidbit of the extent of his stalking:

The best place to start off on this little tale is the day we first met. It was at a game of chess a bit after or before the lunch period in High School. If I remember correctly he was about two years my junior. If I had known that agreeing to that game would lead to around 8 years of madness and abuse I wouldn't have even glanced at his direction but unfortunately hindsight is 20/20 and I don’t have the ability to time travel (if I did though, I’d be more wanted than Rick Sanchez). So unfortunately I sat down that day and played a game with him. I made the joke that my play style could only be described as an “Ice Queen”. He claimed that he was undefeated in his ranks and was often called the “Emperor”. It was rather easy for me to take all his pieces and leave his king to stand alone – I now figure he wasn’t good at chess at all and was probably trying to sound like a big shot when he is more like Andrew Tate’s personality realized into a human person.

In the end we smiled and thanked each other for a good game and left it at that. I’m not sure it was lunch for that day or the day after but I saw him at the cafeteria and welcomed him to sit with me and my friends. I even gave him a hug. Someone please kill me. He was welcomed into the group and little did I know that it would eventually mean I’d have to leave in order to protect myself and my sanity.

I don’t remember the first blow up. I honestly can’t remember what it was about – not because I don’t want to, but rather because there were so many that they all just blend together like trying to navigate Incel forums to see if you can tell the difference between who is who or if they’re all just the same guy. There are only three that I can fully remember because of how… absurd and violent they are. I have no idea if these are in chronological order but since these are how I remember them, I’m taking a shot in the dark with this format.

Musicgeddon:

Oh, the ridiculousness of this situation – if you are eating, please swallow your food and put the rest to the side. Don’t even dare drink water for this tale is so unbelievably stupid that my boyfriend said, and I quote “I am having an actual aneurysm….” after laughing uncontrollably for about a minute. I think it nearly killed him.

So, the story begins over either text messages or over discord voice chat. I tried to look over Discord to see if I can find any messages but that ended up fruitless and since my number changed and so has my cell phones, there is no possible way of getting any messages or screenshots. You will have to rely on scout’s honor for this situation. But please note that I’m going to be using theatrics because it is still so absurd that I have to use them to poke fun of it for my sanity can barely handle it. Plus, it’s fitting.

I was talking to Kronostitain100 about a silly fanfiction idea. It was about Edward Elric from Fullmetal Alchemist being a Professor at Hogwarts with the cover of being the nephew of either Minerva McGonagall or Severus Snape and how I got the idea. I told him how I got the idea and wanted to show him. It was the song “Lollipop Kingdom” by SuG. I had tried to find it on youtube but couldn’t, thus I looked for another method. He claimed that he would find it on youtube. I kept telling him he wouldn’t be able to, but he claimed he did. He sent the link and said that the song fit my idea…. Unsurprisingly the song he found wasn’t the song…. At all. He was so far off that mark that it was just ridiculous – Imagine thinking that a Kingdomhearts AMV with the word “Lolipop” in the title would hit that mark!

I stated that he was incorrect in his assumption and that no, it did not fit what I was thinking. I had even described the song to him and how it sounded before he sent the link. I had stated that the song was rather dark and ominous sounding, it gave off a very spooky and gothic vibe. The song he sent sounded more like the old-school “Lollipop, ba-dum-dum-dum” type of sound mixed with the “Barbie Girl” song.

I had found a website that would show him the song. For some reason or another, I couldn’t send the link. So, I had to spell it out for him which took too long somehow, so we went the convoluted route of having to lead him through the magical world of google. The journey was perilous. Why even our dear friend Kevin – who had been with him the entire way – struggled to help Kronos make the perilous journey that his single stunted brain cell could comprehend the idea of the grand powerful weapon form of the Key Blade that was the mighty Enter Key.

The blizzard was harsh. Snow all around the way. The mountain was so steep. MUSH! MUSH I SAY! MUSH! And then the avalanche with a scream - AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!

Well, that was that day.

I dared to make the comment, “Jeez, your laptop is slow.”

Then it happened.

A horrified shriek that could only be compared to Andrew Tate’s ego daring to hear the word “incel” being used to describe him. Or even the dreaded, “Tiny penis energy lookin potato ass”. He then sprinted out of his house as though running from a rabid hyena. Crying into the snow storm outside – and this… right here…. Is where my theatrics must stop. Because this isn’t theatrics at this point. He did. In fact. Run out of his house, into a snow storm, crying…. Over that comment.

Yeah…

Kevin then barked at me. Telling me that I need to watch what I say. Now mind you… this wasn’t the first time I had been yelled at… over something minor upsetting Kronos. I tried to explain to Kevin that I don’t really know what upset him because I wasn’t trying to insult anyone. I didn’t and still don’t understand the offense. I had stated that I don’t understand how that was a slite towards Kronos and even Kevin admitted that Kronos took anything negative that I said as an insult to him. I stated that I felt like I was walking on eggshells and Kevin didn’t care in the slightest. None of my Irl friends believed that for whatever reason that I can’t understand.

But yeah… that’s this story.

History Lesson from Hell:

This story starts off with me waking up. Yep. Waking up. I checked my phone like always and yep. On the dot. He texts me. He knew when I woke up and when I went to sleep by texting me. Every. Waking. Moment. Every. Single. Day. If I remember correctly he was texting me “Good Morning Beautiful”. Now mind you, we were NOT – I repeat – NOT – N.O.T – NEGATIVE – NOT IN THE FUCKING SLIGHTEST – dating. I had turned him down in High School where he was still going. Yes. He was still in High School. I was a grown ass woman going to Community College. He was doing this to and I quote “try to uplift my confidence”. Yes, that was his excuse. It didn’t do that for me… It disgusted me.

He was overtaking my personal space that I wouldn’t even tolerate my family doing. The only reason why I was ATTEMPTING to tolerate was because his freakouts would get so bad that he would tell others that I was telling him to kill himself and many other things of that nature – mind you… I didn’t ever do such a thing nor would I have ever done such a thing because again… the freak outs, and I was bullied incessantly as a child and now by those I called “friends” and saying that shit to me.

On that day I had to go to my second worst subject of all time, come home, deal with my chores, help my grandmother as I do my homework, deal with my mother bitching to me about her job and how Tiffany is such a bitch, how her boyfiend being an asshole drunk who for some reason is monitoring her facebook account and is upset that she dared to be on facebook while she was at work, and I have to look forward to going to a fastfood joint where I work and get bullied by the boss and her second in command who I honestly thought had a lesbian crush on our boss and thus bullies be to hopefully get a chance with the woman.

Ah… totally not busy and stressed.

And that doesn’t even touch upon the fact I had to also deal with felicitythekittycat and her band of idiots.

Totally.

Not.

Stretched Thin and on the brink of madness.

And violence.

Especially violence.

Now. On that fateful beautiful morning. I was going to that class. I was going to pay attention and take notes. I do not accept failure in college. I am not someone who can afford going into debt trying finish my core classes because some fucker can’t go three seconds without a text. It was an insanity I was not willing to take

I told him I was in class.

He ignored that.

I reiterated that I cannot talk because I’m in class.

He ignored that too.

I told him that if he kept that shit up, I was gonna turn off my phone so I could focus on CLASS.

He ignored that as well.

I turned my phone off.

Once I got home I turned my phone on. And tried to avoid the fucking explosion. But it was so vast. So great. That I could feel the nuclear radiation of my entire friend group’s rage. At that time, I was still fairly catholic and I could’ve sworn I was cursed by Satan himself.

I can’t even remember the number of angry texts I got that day. It was practically infinite. I had almost as many phone calls. I dared my hand to press one of the many voicemail messages I had. And it was like a hot knife to the heart. Sharp. Burning, and chilling all at the exact same time. Like feeling the pulsating pain as you feel all the warmth leaving your body and watching the world slowly turn black as you struggle for your life.

I called Kevin and got an earful. I could almost hear my ears ringing at the sound of his angry voice. I could only do nothing but sit in silence as he let it all out about how I’m a terrible person and should go to hell and rot for what I had apparently said to Kronos. About all the things I never said and how downright cruel I apparently was.

Once I finally got a word in I could only ask “What are you talking about, I’ve been in class for the past hour?...”

It took me about another hour to explain to him that I hadn’t said any of those things because I was in class. I even showed him a screenshot of my message history and my call history to show him that I was not lying.

I didn’t get an apology. Rather I got yelled at some more for not texting Kronos while I was in class. How it didn’t matter and was invalid. It took everything in me… to not kill him.

Verbally that is.

But if I could kill him, and bring him back to life just so I could punch him directly in the balls as an added fuck you. I would have.

Oh how much I would have.

But I couldn’t. I couldn’t give him a verbal beatdown that only a future English Major could. I couldn’t because if I did, it would validate the lie that Kronos told them and I could not risk that. These were my first friends and they were my friends first. And I couldn’t lose them. Not this time.

I texted Kronos and told him off for this. He claimed ignorance and said that he was only saying what he felt and that he never meant for any of this to happen. I called bullshit and I apologize to you dear reader for having to smell this bullshit. He got the bright idea of asking me for my college schedule so he could text me without interrupting my classes.

I wonder why I’m suicidally depressed….

I refused obviously.

He didn’t understand.

He wonders why I call him a yandere and a stalker….

I couldn’t bare to lose my friends. We just pretended like that all did happen like we did with the other times this type of thing happened. The hell just continued like normal.

Skeletons in the Closet:

This one is both the most clear and yet blurry memory I have. At this point the texting got worse and worse as time went on and my temperament only worsened as he continued to become worse. I will talk about my temper at a later date because it is extremely relevant. I can’t remember the “True beginning” but what I can remember was that for almost a month he kept texting me a variant of these few messages: “Are you okay?”

“You can tell me anything!”

“I’m always here for you!”

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

And the like. It was very much an odd thing and I kept telling him I was fine. I was okay. I wasn’t telling him that I had problems with him because whenever I did, I’d be dogpiled by my IRL “friend group”, so I kept that out of it. So yeah. I was perfectly fine – minus his stalking and pestering. However he persisted like always. And very much like the demon that is my temper, it slowly started build up. He’d ask those questions about three times a day. And I was getting…. Annoyed to say the least.

If I were to describe the amount of anger that slowly built up – it would be like the time Markipler described strangling a tree.

I am very much a terrifying presence when I am angry and I admit that regrettably but it was what protected me as a child and it… kind of did here.

After a certain point I broke. It was around 8-9pm if I remember correctly. He had DEMANDED I tell him what was wrong. Telling me that he had “heard I was going through something big” and that “there was something wrong”.

So… I broke.

Now to describe my anger at that moment as I stormed into my bathroom, cell phone in hand…

I will quote a certain song that really resonates with me and how I’d describe my temper:

“ And all the kids cried out, “Please stop! You’re scaring me!”

I can’t help this awful energy.

“GOD DAMN RIGHT YOU SHOULD BE SCARED OF ME!”

Who is in control? “

It is very much something that builds up over time while also being purely instinctual. Like a tiger that has had enough of the circus. A madness that is constantly watching as the class wall that was hiding it, slowly crack and break. A volcano starting to overflow with magma, just ready to explode. Yellowstone if you will.

After months and years of just pure forced silence… it finally erupts in such a magnitude that it’s damn near earth shattering.

I ripped open scars that I had kept sealed away, wide open. I forcefully kicked down the closet door, grabbed my skeletons by their vertebrae and flung them right at Kronos. I screamed so loud that day that I nearly blew out my voice. I screamed about the abuse I suffered as a child, and more. I cried a visceral cry. At the end I screamed something multiple times:

“THERE! ARE YOU HAPPY! YOU GOT WHAT YOU WANTED! ARE YOU HAPPY? ARE YOU SATISFIED?!” He was silent before repeating one sentence like a broken record: “I’m sorry! I didn’t know! I’m sorry!”

He kept repeating that and I didn’t believe it. At the end of it I hung up, only to get a harrowing text. Him claiming he punched himself at full force over making me cry.

Which he actually did and was confirmed through Discord via a fucking picture of his fist with a chain wrapped around it.

Social Aftermath

To say that I was and still am broken about the aftermath is an understatement. Even my most closest of friends didn’t believe me about him. It was only at the two most closest friends I had’s birthday party that they actually somewhat comprehended exactly what was going on. In which we all had to have a “private group chat” about him, myself, and @felicitythekittycat. However, the Stalker’s idea of private was… the kitchen which connected to the dining room which also connected to the living room – which is about as private as being buck-fucking-naked as a newborn baby in the middle of the most popular shopping district in New York City.

One friend had told him that he better not say the first thing that pops in his head as we talked – now the talk was about something extremely embarrassing and involved fetishes. Now as we were scolding him about how he treated Felicitythekittycat, and how he should’ve kept it to himself, he opened his fucking mouth and claimed something along the lines of an “Interesting bonding experience” from what I remember…. And I lost my goddamn mind to put it lightly.

I was about half a second away from punching him right in the balls, though I didn’t because… Felicity/Tier/whatever her name is at this point of writing, ran off to have what can only be described as a panic attack? I don’t know if it was fake, I doubt it but then again the girl is such a liar that I wouldn’t be surprised if she was trying to win an oscar. After that I was told I needed to go home and that he needed to leave as well. As we were leaving I was screaming bloody murder at the guy while he was yelling back that he didn’t do anything wrong, that he got his social skills from us, etc.

It was horrible.

I was told by one of the closest friends that she finally understood what I meant because of that day. But I now know that she didn’t even understand the half of it. Because after… the blow up between me and @felicitythekittycat, and me finally getting the courage to cut him out – he actually stalked me at my retail job after that, my managers told me that he went there every day, they had to start hiding me everytime he was spotted during my shifts thank god – my so called “friends” would avoid the topic of him. They would avoid me for months, practically years just to avoid the topic because I sometimes dared to bring him up. At… one point I finally got into contact with one of them in the form of a call.

I had told her that I had finally cut him out and about how felicitythekittycat turned me suicidal and how I was now medicated and was going to therapy etc… and she told me this:

“You need to align your chakras.” like it’s a me problem….

That I didn’t need my medication or therapy…

Just… align my charkas….

It took everything in me to not toss that cellphone into the nearest fucking wall. It wasn’t even mine… it was her sister’s because the sister is the other friend.

After a long while I have finally cut them out. I lost all my IRL friends, several online ones, and my sanity to boot.

Because of a stalker, and a lying ass whore.

The thing is, is that I voiced to them how I felt unsafe around him. How he stalked my great aunt’s home and saw that there were supposedly cop cars surrounding her house – he claimed this wasn’t him trying to seek my attention but I did call her and no… there were no cops.

He once claimed that if it took my family to hold a weapon to his head to just talk to me… he’d do it.

I carried pocket knives with me to keep some semblance of safety. He once gave me one… but I gave it away and bought my own because I didn’t want to have anything of his. He gave me a PS3… and I’m still trying to figure out how to get rid of it.

He once gave me… almost $2,000.00 for a laptop and said he was only doing it as a “gift to a friend” – I gave that money to my grandmother for a freezer because I didn’t want to feel like a cheap hooker. He tried to use that against me later on when I finally cut him out.

He had no self respect. He didn’t bathe like a normal human being – I know this because he smelled worse than a wet dog that hadn’t bathed for 3 years and his hair was so greasy that I wondered if he even knew of the concept of shampoo. I doubt he owns a single bar of soap or has the proficiency to use it. He even wore two thick winter jackets in the summer. So for a long time it had been “No. Not interested.” before he even asked me out, but he wouldn’t take no for an answer.

I honestly don’t think he even understood what “No” meant. He couldn’t comprehend the word. To this day, I’m still scared…

If you want more information as to how creepy of a man this guy is click here!

#tw: stalking #tw: manipulation #tw: abuse #tw: mental health #tw: anger #The Stalker

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celamoon · 3 years

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JJK characters as people I met before college

Characters include: Itadori, Megumi, Inumaki, Nanami, Gojo, Nobara, Maki, Sukuna, Geto

Warnings: unedited, typed at 12am ❤️

Itadori as the boy I liked for a bit in freshman year. He’s sweet, incredibly athletic, but also a bit bonkers. He shares a good number of passions with you and he also talk a lot. He has a sibling, who’s apparently a skater boy who plays girls. He knows how to cook, but can be a bit stubborn at times. He’s the reason you studied to hard to pass the placement test with, only to end up realizing that he didn’t make it. But he was sweet, even if you later on realized that you two weren’t compatible.

Megumi as the boy I had a crush on in 4th grade. He generally doesn’t talk, always done with his friends wrecking havoc. He’s sweet though, because when he catches your eyes slightly dropping he’ll have you lean onto his shoulder to rest if you’re sitting down. If you guys are out, then he’ll excuse the two of you to go home. He doesn’t talk much at school, but he never hesitates to let you know about how he’s feeling. He always listens to you vent after he finishes talking about his day. He also offers you great advice and helps you cut off people who are damaging to you. Once you got sick and this man cooked you up an entire dish for when you woke up. Another time you went to an amusement park with him and he won you a stuffed animal. He also really liked mangoes so now you use mango flavoured chapstick as a habit. You still talk to him surprisingly enough.

Inumaki as the boy I sat next to in middle school History class. He’s quiet, quiet as hell and hates talking to the class. He will slip in a passive aggressive comment that’s enough to have someone shut up every once in a while though. He refuses to share his notes with anyone but you, and you even get to use his expensive alcohol markers! He lets you use the coloured pencils and ruler he carries around in his backpack and only ever discusses on topics with you. He helps you grab your binder from the shelf when the teacher calls on everyone to, and he also shares homeroom with you. Once you actually got him to talk about his passion for chess and homeboy wouldn’t shut up about it (it was adorable). On top of that he also always letting you raid his lunch for the snacks his parents pack him. He also mentioned that he would miss you in high school. You still have the words ‘I’ll miss you’ written in your yearbook from your final year.

Nanami as the boy I always vented to in sophomore. He comes to you to vent about school and work often, and you’re always there to listen to him. You offer words of advice and you listen to the tea that he heard of from Gojo. He always asks before venting and always apologizes after. You two form trust, as you vent to him quite often as well. He a really good listener, and he would drop the task at hand to make sure you’re ok. He sends you song reccs and animal crossing updates too. He’s really sweet, and you feel safe around him. He would fight a rude person on the street for you if you asked him to.

Gojo as the guy my friend had a fat crush on. He was sweet and you had arrived to the school three days late thanks to an exam, and you had been told that he wrapped your books for you. You find that he’s extremely gifted athletically and he’s the fastest in your school. He talks to lots of people online and even asked one of the girls a grade below you out. He got rejected though. He’s very friendly to you, and he always has a rebuttal to the girl that insults you in class. He also taught you how to insult the girl back . He also comments on how you’ve changed. Cut your hair? He makes a comment. Put yourself hair up/down? He makes a comment. Got a high grade? He makes a comment praising you about it. You two don’t have a crush on each other but he makes sure that you’re comfortable in school and you’re thankful for him.

Nobara as the popular girl in middle school. She’s not obnoxious surprisingly enough, and she gets along with everyone. She’s the center of all the gossip and she always has the freshest tea. She doesn’t talk with you often, but you once let her know a small secret just to find that she was incredibly good at keeping secrets. She fought with her best friend at some point so she started to talk to you about her relationship with her boyfriend. You got a bit annoyed but she helped you get over the crush on your deskmate so you’re thankful for that. She also talked to a ton of guys online and somehow never bumped into an internet pedophile. You didn’t talk to her much but you’re thankful that she was in your class.

Maki as the smart upperclassman I talked to in middle school. She was incredibly sweet, yet she didn’t talk to that many people in her class since they isolated her. She told you about how she learned martial arts and how she had a passion for photography. You followed her Tumblr page of her photos. She offered you great advice and gave you a reason to not talk to the other girls in your class. She had quite a bit on her chest so you let her vent to you. She talked with you lots and you two started drifting apart after one of your old friends transferred back. Maki let you know that it wasn’t you though, it was your friend who was toxic. You met her a year after at a history competition and was pleased to find that she still trusted you. You miss her often when you have no one to talk to.

Sukuna as the classmate that I never talked to. You heard rumours about him, ghosting girls, not wanting to settle down for one person... but you find that he’s actually quite entertaining as a classmate. He doesn’t talk to you much and settles for causing ruckus in the class instead. He always gets on the teacher’s good side and has saved the class from at least 12 science class lectures. He dated an upper classman and had a crush on the popular girl in your class while in that relationship. He also once bet that you’d be able to make a hoop earlier than the other girl and actually won the bet. His family moves around often and he left a year after. He wrote that you would go places in your yearbook before he left. You still wonder how he does from time to time.

Geto as the boy I called dad in high school. He has a resting bitch face, and he’s almost always done with you, but he’s incredibly kind and sweet sometimes. He helps you with homework and he doesn’t hesitate to point out any errors to you. He talks about his shit teachers often and you have to stifle a laugh so you don’t get in trouble with the teacher. He doesn’t have that big of a friend group but knows way to many people for his own good. He’s sweet in his own way, and is always offering you snacks that he brought from home or bought at the cafeteria. He had anxiety and self confidence issues though, and you try to help as much as you can by praising him. He’s lovely, just a bit too much to handle sometimes.

Itadori's the reason I jumped ahead in chinese. Megumi's the reason I have no trouble cutting people who are toxic to me. Inumaki's the reason I turn things in on time and don't procrastinate. Nanami's the reason I bought animal crossing and my switch, and the reason I started talking with my middle school classmates again. Gojo's the reason why I have no trouble speaking up when I have an issue with someone. Nobara's the reason why I got over a pointless crush. Maki's the reason I work hard in school. Sukuna's the reason I get up when I fall down. and Geto's the reason that I survived high school. Each person I've met in my life is more than just a fleeting figure, they are a puzzle piece, and they made me who I am. So yes, I am just a mosaic of everyone I loved, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

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dontmindmyshadowhunting · 3 years

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I will never forget the day we met - A Ty & Anush Fic (snippet)

Here is a snippet of my Ty and Anush fic! It's about their growing friendship (which may or may not evolve into something else...) at the Scholomance. The events are set after The Lost World. Shortly after Ty has received the Herondale heron shaped pendant from Kit (through Magnus), he gets wind of a certain letter from Tessa to Magnus which mentions a girlfriend...

****

Anush hated Monday mornings at the Scholomance. Breakfast was taken, as it was every single day of the week, in the dining room, which looked like the inside of a cathedral, with a high ceiling, rough cold stones and narrow windows.

Every second Monday though, there was always a crowd gathering in the main hall, where a large black board had been hung next to the entrance of the dining room. On it, in thick white chalk, were inscribed the initials of the ten students who had distinguished themselves in the past fortnight. They were ranked, first to last, every two weeks.

It was the same show every time, Centurions huddled together and craning their necks eagerly, and Anush wondered why they even bothered checking. The initials for the first place had been consistently the same since the school year had started. TB. TB. TB. TB. For Tiberius Blackthorn.

Fighting for next ranks were Seela and Joshua. The Scholomance being more about brains than muscles, Seela usually landed the second place and Joshua the third. There she was, her dark ponytail bobbing, half smug half furious she had been beaten yet again by the youngest of them all.

Anush remembered his first day back at the Scholomance, after the end of the Cold Peace. Divya had introduced him to Seela and he had immediately found her pretty. She had an angular face with smooth golden skin and big dark eyes, framed by black silky hair. But she had barely spared him a glance, looking past him for any more interesting acquaintances. She had won several national chess championships and, Divya, always kind and helpful, had pointed Tiberius Blackthorn in the crowd. “You should play him. Diego told me he loves to play chess and he’s pretty good at it.” Seela had looked the Blackthorn boy up and down dubiously. He was standing awkwardly, looking like a frightened little bird next to his big brother Julian, who was clutching his sibling’s arm tightly, his blue-green eyes shooting daggers at the throng of admirers closing in on them. “That little boy over there? I play chess. I don’t babysit.” Anush had disliked her there and then.

Wall that served her right. Seela. Rhymes with karma, karma, karma.

Joshua, on the other hand, had always been a nice guy. Even now, he took his third position gracefully, flashing a smile of perfect white teeth against dark skin, like the younger version of Idris Elba that he was. A group of giggling girls were surrounding him, as usual. Not only was he a hunk, he also had amazing weapon skills. Some called him the “new Perfect Diego”. He was the guy who had it all. Still, even in combat, he was no match to TB, who had apparently received excellent training at the LA Institute.

Suck it up, bitches, Anush gloated, as he weaved past the legion of Centurions and joined the dining room. He started piling up food on his plate. He always had his biggest meal at breakfast because he hated the food they served at lunch and dinner time.

He had set himself a task that day and was eager to go through with his plan. When his plate was so full he could almost hide behind it, his gaze went directly to the far end corner of the room, where one could usually find Tiberius Blackthorn sitting alone, eating quietly, a book propped up in front of him.

And there he was, exactly where Anush had expected him to be.

He approached making deliberate noise, so as not to startle his prey. It worked. TB looked up, his fork frozen mid-air.

Up close, he looked fragile and delicate. Or maybe it was because Anush had witnessed him collapse a few days before and had brought him to the infirmary. He wondered if he had health issues, but that wasn’t the type of questions you asked when you were trying to make a new friend. And that’s exactly what he planned to do. TB seemed to be a nice guy, and Anush had taken care of his Carpathian Lynx after all, when the boy had been ill. The scratches he still bore on his arms were evidence of that.

But just as he opened his mouth to speak, he heard them. The mutters he was used to suffer behind his back. But this time was different. It was not only about him.

“Look. Joshi made his way to Blackthorn."

"Do you think he is going to apologize for what the Cohort did to his twin sister?"

"We all know they are responsible for her death. They could as well have been the ones wielding the sword.”

"Those bastards laughed at her funeral."

Anush froze. He had assumed Tiberius’ reserved demeanor was only shyness. Had he been mistaken? Was there something else?

The Blackthorn boy straightened up as if he was about to say something, but whatever it was, Anush never got to hear it.

He had already turned on his heel and fled the scene, his breathing uneasy.*

Everything changed two days later. The Centurions had been summoned to gather in the amphitheatre which also served as a training room. Anush sat on a bench, in the second row, his hands folded in his lap. The buzz of voices subsided as the martial arts instructor came to stand in front of the students and gestured for quiet. He was to make an announcement on behalf of Jia Penhallow, who was spending the week at the Los Angeles Institute for family reasons (apparently her daughter Aline and her wife Helen Blackthorn were contemplating adoption).

“Until now, we have tested you individually. We have identified – you have uncovered or confirmed – your strengths and weaknesses. From now on, you will be working in pairs. Starting tomorrow and until the end of the year. This means you share points… and rank.”

A chatter erupted in the room. Grades, and above all rank was everything at the Scholomance. They were all elite, but who wouldn’t want to be the elite of the elite? Depending on your rank, you belonged – or not – to the Primi Ordines. The First Order. The Holy Grail. Amen.

All eyes flickered to the slender figure of Tiberius Blackthorn, who was lounging on a bench at the far end of the room, totally oblivious of his surroundings. He was playing with a silvery item in his hand, turning it this way and that. Anush realized he seemed much happier than usual, his pale face alight.

The instructor called names randomly and, one after the other, the students filled in the name of the fellow Centurion they would be pairing with until the end of the year. There were heated discussions, tears shed. It was a big deal. The only one who seemed unconcerned was Tiberius Blackthorn. Of course. He didn’t care who he would be partnered with. He just had to say the word, and anyone would crawl – vows of eternal friendship broken in the blink of an eye – and stand next to him. First place. A spot in the Primi Ordines without breaking a sweat.

Anush needed to be strategic. TB was not even an option. Who else? Anush was not nearly as strong as Joshua or as clever as Seela, and they would probably pick someone who mastered another subject. He needed to find someone like him. Not excellent, but not mediocre either. Too bad they didn’t teach music at the Scholomance.

Why not Liam? He sat next to him in Faerie studies, and they had made small talk several times before the class started. He wasn’t particularly bright or skilled, where Centurions where concerned. They had all been top of their classes at their Institutes or at the Academy, but that was the Scholomance.

When the instructor called “JOSHI,” Anush moved to stand before Liam. His palms were sweaty.

“Liam,” Anush asked, his mouth dry. “Want to pair up?”

Liam looked at him with undisguised contempt. It almost shocked him. What had he done to deserve it?

“Hmmm, I’ll pass. I don’t really want to pair up with a coward.”

“WHAT?”

“Well, you were with the Cohort, weren’t you? Then you fled from a battle, and they made you do the chores.”

Most of the students around paused in their babbling and… either snickered or stared at Anush in disgust. His gaze moved automatically to Tiberius. He wasn’t looking their way, but he seemed to have suddenly stilled, as if he was listening in.

“I changed sides! I fought in the battle of the Imperishable Fields!”

“Yeah, you betrayed them for the winning side! How brave of you!” Bursts of laughter filled the room.

“We weren’t winning then! Where were you while I was risking my life? Still sucking your mother’s tits?”

“QUIET!” The instructor ordered. They all fell silent – Centurions were obedient that way – though Liam still had a smirk on his face. “So, who’s going to pair up with Joshi?”

A terrible, humiliating silence ensued, but it was fortunately of short duration.

“I am.”

The words had not been shouted, but the quiet, deep voice that uttered them commanded attention.

Every face turned toward the far end corner of the room. Anush realized with a jolt that Tiberius was now standing. He was no longer playing with the object in his hand. He had tied it around his neck. He wore two chains now, one slightly longer than the other.

A chorus of angry voices erupted. What the hell? Why is he doing this? Why would a Blackthorn pair up with a yellow-belly and a double-crosser who used to be Cohort?

“Joshi and Blackthorn,” the instructor barked as he scribbled on his notepad.

And that’s how it all started.*

****

To be continued.

Tagging @gabtapia and @amchara :)

#the secrets of blackthorn hall #the wicked powers #the dark artifices #ty blackthorn #tiberius blackthorn #anush joshi

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enjennie · 3 years

Text

Chapter 2 - Coffee Boy and a Chess Tournament

Chapter 1

Chapter 3 - Here

Word count: 2.5k

The girls were in a frenzy when they got to know about Yuri’s mystery coffee man. The girls in question would be Seoyun, Hyebin and Cho with the exception of Minjae, who had some student council business and ran off before they could have lunch together.

“Oh my, who could this be? Describe him to me once more,” Cho had her arm looped through Yuri’s as they walked out of the dining hall after having their lunch. Seoyun and Hyebin walked a few steps in front of them. Yuri couldn’t help but giggle, a week hasn’t gone by yet but a boy had already managed to catch her eye. She thought about his face for a moment, and started describing it to Cho. “Well, he had kind of a messy hair look. Had a varsity jacket on and wore all black underneath. Really bright eyes and oh don’t even get me started about his smile,” Yuri almost swooned.

Cho repeatedly starts hitting Yuri’s arm, uncontrollably giggling and shaking her by the shoulders. “He was wearing a varsity jacket? So he must be on the team!”

“Probably? I’m not sure which sport, though,” Yuri tells Cho, but Cho only shook her off. “There’s only one varsity team, silly. The Neos,” Cho explained, making big motions with her hands, but Yuri was no longer focusing on what she was saying when the mystery man himself had come striding in front of them.

Yuri hurriedly gets Cho’s attention by tapping on her arm and whispering, “That’s him! Over there,” Cho follows Yuri’s eyes and the two look onto the field that stretched acres. “No way,” Cho’s eyes widened, pulling her sunglasses down to make sure she was seeing correctly. “Na Jaemin?” the girl exclaimed.

“Are you sure it’s him?”

Seoyun, Cho, Yuri and Hyebin were now sat on a picnic bench in the quad, huddled together and discussing the situation at hand. “It all makes sense, of course it’s him! I should’ve known when Yuri said coffee!” Cho facepalmed at her own ignorance.

Cho is the elite’s main source of information. She knows what’s the latest news about anyone within the campus. Knows where to get the best drugs, who’s throwing the parties, and where. She’ll get to know anything, all with one swipe on her phone. Which is why she felt foolish for not thinking about Na Jaemin, Oakwood’s heartthrob and one of their elite members. The boy who can send any girl to their feet with one look. “I just didn’t expect it… I don’t know why after Yeeun I didn’t think Jaemin had it in him to date,”

Yuri’s head turn in light of the information. “Yeeun, my roommate?”

Seoyun nodded, “The two dated for the first two semesters of freshmen year, then broke off when Yeeun and Jeno got caught hooking up at a party,” she explained to the dumbfounded girl. Yuri frowned, “Was that why-“

“That’s why I told you not to meddle with Jeno,”

“Did Yeeun and Jeno date then?”

“Yes, for a while. Like, two weeks a while. We’ve never seen Jaemin and Jeno be apart for so long we thought it was over for good, but I guess they worked it out in the summer since they’re pals again,”

Yuri’s head was spinning at this point. She hadn’t even met Yeeun yet, so she tried not to get her perception of her roommate get affected by the things she’s hearing about her.

After a while, the group of girls pack it up and start heading back to the dorms when Cho receives a text regarding a party. “Of course, it’s one of Jeno’s parties. So he can fish out the girls he wants to play with for the year,” Minjae, who’d joined them a few minutes before, rolled her eyes. Cho and Hyebin on the other hand didn’t share her distaste for the male. “You can’t deny, Jeno throws the best parties,”

She couldn’t. It was true. But she was uninterested.

“11pm chess tournament, first 5th at the Lee Estate,”

Yuri blinked, registering the unfamiliar terms. “First fifth?”

Minjae put her arm around the girl as she elucidated to the somehow always clueless Yuri. “The first fifth would mean this Friday. We use codes like chess tournament or board games to talk about upcoming parties. We change it up every now and then, though. To prevent weasels,”

Yuri understood right away, but didn’t think there would be a need for these types of stuff.

“Isn’t college all about parties?” Yuri asked, matter of factly, humouring Minjae and Seoyun. “Then you came to the wrong school. Oakwood doesn’t allow parties, this is where rich families send their troubled children they don’t have time for. Discipline here is no joke,”

Yuri wondered how she never knew this about the school she’d done extensive research about before applying to.

The week flew by quickly, and soon enough Yuri found herself on the fifth of the week. She managed to survive all her classes and was pretty satisfied with how well she’s coping up. Despite being new to her surroundings, she’s only gotten lost in the campus twice. Which is a record, for newbies apparently. Hyebin told Yuri about her first time getting lost at Oakwood and she ended up at the teacher’s locker rooms. She recalled having to squat under a desk for hours, praying to god no one would use the desk she was under. Both girls had a laugh about it.

Today would be the party, but before that, they had to join orgs and clubs. Minjae, as student body secretary, already has the council as her club. Seoyun on the other hand, signed up for theater along with Renjun. Cho and Hyebin, were nowhere in sight which forced Yuri to go about club hunting on her own.

She’d thought about it for the whole week, however she wasn’t entirely sure yet. Originally, she would just join any orgs her friends were in but she can’t run for student body, and neither can she act so that was out of the question.

Yuri looked around her, flocks of people gathered in small and big groups, already looking like they were all familiar with each other. She dug her hands deep in her pockets and sighed before catching sight of somewhere that actually interested her.

Student Publication club, their banner was straight to the point and plain. A boy in a similar looking varsity as Yuri had seen Jaemin and Jeno wearing sat in front of the desk, beside him was Cho, who Yuri was glad to see. She walked towards them and waved when Cho’s eyes met hers.

“Yuri! Did you join a club yet?” Cho enthused. Yuri shook her head, and the boy beside Cho lifts his eyes from the paper he was reading.

“Depends, are you guys still hiring?” Yuri inspected the sign up sheet displayed on their table, which had a good amount of names scribbled on it already. Cho hands her a pen, “You’re so in. This is Mark, pub president,”

“I’d appreciate if you stopped calling our club a pub,” the said Mark scolds. “Nice to meet you I’m Mark Lee,” he stretched his hand forward and Yuri shook it. “Pleased to meet you, Mark,”

Mark has dark hair that fell over his forehead and round eyes that pierced through Yuri’s. He has high cheekbones and a nicely defined jawline. Mark flashes Yuri a smile and she’s stunned by it.

When will I stop getting surprised by all the hot boys that roam this school?

“Hi, losers. How’s it going?” a boy with hair that resembled a lion’s mane had walked up to the table. He had full lips and cute cheeks.

“Speak for yourself, Donghyuck,” Cho retorts at the boy.

The boy faces Yuri, giving her a curt smile. “Oh, are you signing up? I got a tip for you… run now,” he says, before receiving a firm backhand smack from Mark who’d leaned over the table. Yuri laughed, watching the two boys wrestle. “It’s almost time. I reckon no one else wants to sign up, so what do you say we wrap up?” Cho nudges Mark and he agrees. “Yuri? Want to go together?”

“Sure,”

“Oh you’re the Yuri I’ve been hearing about. Hi, I’m Donghyuck, you can call me Hyuck for short,” the boy had gotten himself out of Mark’s headlock and fixed himself up. “The Yuri you’ve been hearing about?” Yuri asked.

Hyuck nods, “Renjun hit you with the soccer ball, right?” he chuckled and Yuri wanted to curl up into a ball right then and there. “Is that what I’m known for now?” Yuri scrunched her nose, cringing. Hyuck laughed, his eyes glimmered and he pats her shoulder as a form of consoling. “That’s fine, I was known as the bread boy last year… I shoved a whole roll into my mouth and the photos weren’t pretty,” he looked scornfully as he remembered his past.

Yuri’s lips curled into a smile and she laughed at Hyuck’s little story.

“Yuri, c’mon,” Cho pulls on Yuri’s arm and the two mutter a quick goodbye to each other before Yuri’s swept away.

“So you’ve met her,”

The boys were gathered in the field, by the bleachers. The soccer team was already their club, so they didn’t have to go club searching and signing up. Donghyuck and Mark had caught up to Jeno, Jaemin and Renjun who were sat, sharing a blunt.

“Yeah. You guys didn’t tell me she was that much of a stunner, I could’ve prepared for a better first impression,” muttered Hyuck, who had his hair in a mess and a lazy outfit to match.

Renjun scoffed, “Please, I hit her with a soccer ball. How’s that for a first impression?”

The boys shared laughs and Jeno looks over at Jaemin, who was looking through his camera checking the shots he was able to take from the event.

“Someone’s quiet,” Jeno comments.

Jaemin’s head shot up, already knowing it was him. “What?”

“I heard from Seoyun that you left quite an impression on Yuri,” Jeno sported a sly grin on his face. Jaemin rolls his eyes, looking back down at his camera.

“I just gave her coffee because she looked like she was gonna die without it,”

“Right,” Renjun murmured.

“Shut up, Renjun,” the boy hissed.

Yuri was confused. Not only did Minjae just push a Versace dress to her chest, complete with Louboutins to match, she also told her to ‘keep it’.

“Wait, but why?” uttered Yuri, examining the dress and shoes that probably cost more than all her life spending totaled. Minjae didn’t bat an eye as she pulled out another dress from her wardrobe in a stone blue shade, putting it against her body to check if it was what she was going for. “I don’t think red suits me, but I reckon it’d look good on you though, so keep it,” she mutters.

“I can’t take this, Minjae. But thank you,” Yuri mused as she put down the dress and shoes on the bed. Minjae turned around and crossed her arms. “Then what will you wear to the party?”

“I think I have a Zara dress somewhere,” Yuri shrugged.

“You can’t be caught dead in a Zara dress. We’re not in our 30s yet! Put this on. It’s an order,” Minjae took the dress and pushes it into Yuri’s hands once more. The girl could only abide.

Once dressed, the girls go about their plan to meet up at Hyebin’s dorm. Sneaking past the RA and professors going on rounds, they arrived without getting caught. By 10:30, they were removing their heels to get ready to make their escape through Hyebin’s terrace.

“You want me to jump?” Yuri gasped, looking down at the height in which they had to come down from.

The rest of the girls had already made their way down, strategically climbing down using the rope they’d tied to the railing of the terrace. They were now waiting for Yuri, who looked like a cat scared for its life.

“You’ve got… three girls to catch you, don’t worry!” called Seoyun in a hushed voice.

“We have 2 minutes until the guard comes back around,” Minjae looked down at her phone.

“Granted, it’s our fault for not telling her beforehand that she’d be coming down at least 3 meters high off a balcony,” Hyebin looked up at Yuri in pity. “Come on, girl! You got this,” encouraged Seoyun at her poor friend.

Yuri’s heart raced and with sweaty hands, she threw her legs over the railing and grabbed onto the rope, hugging it for dear life. She probably flashed the three girls but her only agenda was to really get to the ground safe, and so she did.

“Great! Nice one, Yuri. Come on,” Seoyun had her heels in hand and she grabs Yuri’s with the other, pulling her to the direction of the trees for their getaway. Seoyun, Hyebin, Yuri and Minjae ran altogether until they reach a secluded area, unfamiliar to Yuri.

“Now,” Seoyun puts her heels back on. “The fun starts,” she continued, before running towards to a hooded figure in the distance and being engulfed in a hug. She pulls the person into the light, revealing Renjun.

“You girls ready to party?” yelled an ecstatic Jeno, who’d appeared from a convertible car parked behind Renjun.

I’ve gone down a 3 meter high balcony in the tiniest dress ever, Yuri thought. This better be one hell of a party.

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frankierogothdad · 4 years

Text

Wow, I should be asleep.

This is for you, frankierogothdad

Checkmate.

Boarding school wasn’t supposed to be this bad. Hell, it wasn’t supposed to be bad at all. Frank was supposed to go to the most prestigious all-boys boarding school in the state, which he had earned a scholarship for, then graduate with flying colors. Maybe he’d be a doctor, or a lawyer, just something to make his parents proud and give them more money than they could ever dream. That was the plan anyway.

This school apparently wasn’t any normal prestigious school. It hadn’t been for a very long time. Frank realized this only one week after his arrival, during lunch hour.

“Dude, Gerard has a challenger! Right in the middle of lunch too!” Ray half-whispered, clearly excited.

Frank quirked his eyebrow in confusion, “Who’s that?”

Ray gaped at him. “Gerard Way?” Frank only shook his head to let him know he hadn’t heard of him. “Dude, I know this is your first year here and all, but you’ve been here a whole week! How have you not heard of him by now?”

“I don’t have time for all this high school drama shit, I don’t care if he’s the captain of the football team or something-”

Ray frantically waved his hand to push away Frank’s complaints. “It’s starting!” He stretches his long arm at the table across from them indiscreetly with a small group of people standing on one side of it. Frank was about to mention the lack of attention this supposedly important event was getting when he noticed every single pair of eyes trained onto the table. Even one-eyed Pete was ogling with intensity.

The table had two boys sitting on either side, one well-groomed boy with ginger hair sat on one side with his gaggle of friends standing menacingly behind him. Another boy sat alone on the other side, facing the ginger. Frank couldn’t see his face from the side he sat on, only the generic school uniform each student had to wear and shoulder-length, unkempt, black hair.

“Hello, what can I do for you?” a soft voice said, echoing throughout the silent hall. It was the kid with black hair.

“We heard you’re some tough guy that we can get money from,” the ginger sneered, obviously feeling superior to everyone in that room.

The dark hair shook lightly as he giggled, “You can earn the money. Sometimes people ask for other favors instead.”

The last statement piqued the stuck up kid’s interest. “What kind of favors?”

“Whatever you want, really.”

One of the guys in the group around the ginger, a tall tan kid, leaned down and whispered something for only the ginger to hear. Whatever it was left an unnerving grin on his face. “You’re name’s Gerard, right?” The dark hair, Gerard, nodded. “Well, Gerard, I’ll take you up on that favor offer instead.”

The unknown face cocks to the side lightly, “Can I ask what it is?”

There’s a barking laugh from the entourage of friends. “You can ask, but I won’t tell.”

“They never do,” he sighs with a laugh. “You’re Roger, by the way. I know you’re new, so I guess you don’t know how this works, right?”

Roger, looks awkwardly at his companions in confusion as to how he knew his name. “Um, yeah, what are we going to do?”

“Well, we play a simple game of chess. If you win, then you get your favor.”

The opponent’s eyes narrow, “And if you win?”

“I get my own favor cashed in!” he chirps.

“And what exactly is that favor?” a second bystander inquires, causing Gerard’s face to snap up towards the standing figure.

Frank catches a slight portion of the mysterious face as he smiles. “Everyone in here knows my request.” The whole room was nodding, no one saying a single thing. “I’ve got the chessboard and my trusty assistant,” he pats his bat at his side that went unnoticed by Frank but caused fear and anticipation in the spectators. “There’s a rule about playing with me, I-”

Roger rolled his eyes, interrupting Gerard, “Whatever let’s get on with it.”

In one swift movement, Gerard slips out a fold-able chessboard and lays it on the table perfectly distanced between them. There was a whole collective intake of breath, all of them unknowing of what’s going to happen next with these new circumstances. His seemingly bloodless hands set up the pieces delicately, brushing curtly on his thighs once he’s done. “Your move,” he says, tone slightly different than before.

Roger confidentially sets up one of his pawns to be killed, to drag out a more important piece of Gerard’s. Gerard takes the bait and happily takes out one measly pawn using a bishop. He suddenly stands up, clasping his bat tightly in one hand, “This is my favorite part of the game,” he says in a desperate, breathless voice.

Roger lifts a brow. “We aren’t done yet.”

The bat scrapes its jagged edges along the floor as Gerard saunters to the other side of the table next to his baffled boy. “You didn’t let me finish my rules,” he murmurs in a hushed voice. Before Roger can retort or one of his friends can step in, there’s a sickening crack that echos throughout the room with a bloodcurdling scream. There’s a stifled soft moan… from Gerard. No one moves a muscle. Not the supposed friends, not the on-lookers, not even Ray, the anti-violence man himself, says anything. It’s as though they all expected it and were awaiting the next part in the series.

Before he realizes he’s doing it, Frank abruptly stands up out of his chair, “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?!”

Now all eyes locked onto him, people gasped and whispered to one another at the intrusion of what seemed to be a regular thing. This would have made Frank self-conscious or uncomfortable, but he held his ground, knowing that whatever sick game he was playing wasn’t right.

“Frank, what are you doing? It was getting to the good part,” Ray whispered quickly, tugging at the edge of his blazer, trying to get him to sit back down and quit making a scene.

Gerard swift turns around and meets Frank’s eyes. His hazel eyes boring straight through Frank’s and digging deep into his mind. A cheerful sickening grin was slapped on his face, decorated with a light flush that Frank could only describe as arousal. “Do we have another challenger?!” he grandly announces, the shy persona from earlier dropping.

Frank’s face contorts into disgust, “I would never, but you need to leave him alone.”

The chapped lips that were previously in a cheerful smile drop on one side to give a lopsided grin. “No, Frank. I know you’re new, but those aren’t the rules.” The locked hazel eyes raked up and down Frank’s figure. “Tell you what, if you win this game, I’ll erase the debt of Roger completely.” His eyes skitter back to the quivering boy with his head laid down on the table, back bleeding heavily.

“That hardly seems fair, since I’ll be getting punished anyway.” Why was Frank bargaining the deal? It wasn’t as though he were actually going to take him up on it.

Gerard quirks a brow, liking the sudden defiance. “Okay, Iero.” How the fuck did he know his last name? “I’ll make you a better wager. If I win, I’ll still erase Roger’s debt completely.” The room buzzed in confusion. “But you’ll become mine.” This set a stop to all the tittering. While Gerard had beat up plenty of people over his reign, he’d never done it more than once to the same person, as they were all too scared to challenge him once more.

Frank snorts, “Right, and if I win?” What was with him and testing this deal?

Gerard’s eyes light up, “I’ll stop my games,” he says breathlessly. His legs slightly squirmed as he said that.

No one else found it out of the ordinary, considering this was how Gerard usually reacted to high stakes and his sadistic ways, but Frank did. “What the fuck is up with you?”

The lengthy hair drifted off his shoulder as he cocked his head, but not in confusion, just smiling at him. “Do you want to start the game?”

Then another voice piped up, “No, Gerard. Frank just hasn’t been feeling too good lately,” there’s an awkward laugh, “He’ll just say the craziest things-”

Gerard holds up a hand to what Frank knows all too well to be Ray’s voice. Ray whimpers and sputters off in fear at the silent demand. “I asked Frank.”

Frank knew this was a dumb idea. Frank knew he should back out now that he was given the option. There was something about Frank, however. It was why he got such good grades. It was why he got into this school. It was why he was standing before Gerard right now. Frank was one stubborn bastard that didn’t like to be told what he could and couldn’t do.

“Of course, Gerard.”

Gerard bounced on his toes happily. “Excellent!” He turns back to the frantic group of boys surrounding a shaking Roger. “Feel free to take him to the nurse, she’ll know.” the group scrambles and lifts up the fallen warrior and take him out of the dining hall hurriedly. “Go ahead and take his spot, sorry about the mess,” he giggles, gesturing to the blood patches and smears on the table and pieces.

This was one very bad idea. A very very bad idea that Frank could no longer escape. Instead of letting his germaphobia overtake his composure, he sat down and wiped a bit of the blood away with a handkerchief that was tucked in his pocket. “Sorry, I just don’t want stains on my sleeves.”

Gerard scrunched up his nose affectionately, “It’s cute you think that’s all the blood that’s going to be spilled.”

His tone was endearing, but his words were frightening. Frank let out a cough and set the cloth aside. “Right, is it your move?”

Gerard shakes his head and locks eyes with Frank, awaiting his response.

Frank knew the consequences. He had seen them first hand after all, but he still knew that it was the only way he had a chance of beating him. He picked up a pawn and moved it to an experimental spot. Right after, Gerard’d piece replaced Frank’s. When he looked up to meet Gerard’s astonished and hungry gaze, time stood still.

Every person in the hall was eating up the content and eagerly staring outright, not trying to sneak glances subtly anymore. Ray no longer looked to be enjoying the show, he now stared with a pained expression at his hard-headed friend who had no idea what he’d gotten himself into. Frank and Gerard hadn’t stopped staring. They both knew what was to come. Once it settled in, Gerard’s grin grew even wider and more hungry, while the pit in Frank’s stomach only grew deeper.

A collective inhale was heard from the onlookers as Gerard stood up with his partner in hand, drawing nearer and nearer to Frank. Frank didn’t let the wreckage he was feeling internally show, he only sat up straight and braced himself for impact. The bat raised high and Gerard bit his lip as his body flowed with yearning. It would’ve been nice for Gerard to go easy on Frank the first hit, seeing as he was new. He didn’t. The bat collides with Frank’s upper arm harshly, sending a pained cry out of his throat. Gerard moans at the sound and the sight of the gushing blood seeping through the thick blazer.

He moves to return to his seat, but as a last-minute thought reaches out and clasps the wound tightly, letting the blood find its way under his nail and into the ridges of his fingertips.

Frank stifles his cry of pain this time, stopping Gerard in his tracks as he didn’t hear the awaited cry. He stares down at the shaking boy, but returns back to his seat, waiting for Frank to regain his composure and make the next move.

After what seemed like ages, Frank lifted his upper body back into a sitting position from when it curled up with his legs as a safety mechanism. His wound was clutched by the hand attached to his good arm, the hand on the damaged arm shakily moved a piece. Gerard quickly makes his move, watching the pained facial expressions Frank made with every movement he made to press on. His stubbornness was somewhat admirable compared to all the other players Gerard had faced.

The other boys he’d played at the school put up a tough front, but when faced with a bat and the constricting rules, the act dropped real quick. Some boy fainted at the sight of it, others pleaded for forgiveness, others wouldn’t budge but broke down crying after the blow. Frank didn’t, no matter how hard he smashed it into the same wounds, dug the jagged edges into his back, he kept up. He pressed on, body shaking, tears streaming, but no noise. He made no pleasing sound. Gerard still found it attractive nonetheless. The blood dripping off his face, from his mouth, off the patches that had already absorbed their share. It was breathtaking.

While it may have looked visually pleasing, in Gerard’s mind at least, Frank was a mess internally. He’d hoped with no avail to go numb from the many beatings. The sharp edges dug into his flesh, tearing it open and coating himself in his own insides. It was a sickening feeling. The warm gooey blood slithering down his neck, the now practically dyed red shirt clinging to his body, his poor blazer torn at the hardest places of impact. The feeling and lack of blood were throwing Frank for a loop, his head spun and his eyes couldn’t seem to stay focused on the board.

The boys in the dining hall stared in awe at the persevering soldier, bravely defying the sadistic peer who ruled this place. Soon, there were only a few pieces on the board. Everyone in the room had no shame at this point and all circled a good distance away around the table. At this point, Frank was ghostly white and using every cell in his brain to focus on his next move. He had given up on his trusty think-ahead strategy and was now only playing to prove he wasn’t weak and that he could beat him, as unlikely as it seemed.

“Your move, Iero,” Gerard said sweetly, trying to cover up his sheer annoyance at Frank’s plain disobedience of noise.

All the pieces are covered in blood, whether it be from Gerard or Frank touching them with blood-covered hands, or simply being in the splash zone of a bludgeon given to Frank.

Frank slammed his blood-coated king one spot to the left without a thought and let himself drop down onto the table, officially giving up on playing or even moving for that matter. He let out a long guttural groan that he’d been suppressing ever since his first move and felt a small inch of pain rub off from the sweet feeling of release.

Gerard practically swooned and let out a moan of his own, though his more pleasure induced. He scanned the board and smirked at the perfect alignment of his queen and Frank’s king.

“Checkmate,” he said dreamily, harshly knocking Frank’s king off the board.

#submission #ummmm #holy fuck dude #this is awesome #just the right amount of gore and your characterization and dialogue are spot on #thank you so much!!!!

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mojesticworlds · 5 years

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Me, You & Hogsmeade

Me, You, & Hogsmeade

Harry Potter & OC

Word Count: ??? (I'm on mobile)

Gifs - Unsure who owns them sorry, I'm on mobile 🤦

Brief description: You would do absolutely anything to piss your brother off, running late all of the time, be completely oblivious to your surroundings, even spike his drinks with different concoctions that you're trying out, however this scheme looks like it'll rock the sibling bond you two share. Forever.

Inintiate: Operation date Harry. Goddamn. Potter.

The dark black and green robes loosely hung on my arms as I stood next to my brother, who looked impeccable as he stared at me in annoyance. Without saying a word he pulled my robes onto my shoulders and took the small library from my arms. "You really need to remember what the time is, Aquila."

I ran my fingers through my hair before I straighten and tuck my school tie into my grey sweater. "What, and miss the chance of pissing you off each time I'm late?" I took the books from his arms and began walking into the dining hall. "You obviously don't know me well enough, brother, I love pissing you off."

Draco rolled his eyes and sat us next to his friends. Ignoring the group of less than pleasant people I began eating my crumpets while reviewing the potions book father had sent in our last care package.

It was incredibly advanced, in fact a majority of the instructions appeared as gibberish until I waved my wand and translated them into English. "Lia!"

Looking up I spot the beautiful Luna Lovegood forcing herself inbetween Crabbe and Goyle while staring at me in amazement. "I caught one!"

"What? How?!" I say while standing up and reaching out to the small jar in her hands. The glass was cold and I stared into it, attempting to view the little fiend who was on the inside of it.

"It was floating around the common room this morning! Isn't it amazing!" I accepted her glasses and peered into the glass jar.

Inside was a fiesty blue pixie with sharp teeth. It's black, beady eyes staring at me with such hatred it made me feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside. "Luna, you're brilliant! Just in time too, I finally got the-"

Draco yanked my robe hard, causing me to sit before taking the glass jar out of my hands and looking into it briefly before handing it back to Luna. "Leave," Draco said nastily, however he appeared to have remember our agreement of being nice to my friends, because he didn't dare say anymore.

"I'll talk to you later, Luna! Thank you!" I waved at her as she wondered back over to her table.

Looking back at Draco, I smacked the back of his head before putting Luna's glasses into my pocket. "Be nicer, or I'll dye your hand red, again."

"We agreed not at the table."

"I agreed I wouldn't go over to theirs anymore, not Luna come over to ours."

"Don't hang around her anymore, I've told you this - Even mum has! She's Loony Luna! You can't allow your reputation to be ruined by the likes of her!"

I slammed the front cover closed of my book and looked at him. "You're right, Draco, I should really begin thinking of my reputation!" I said loudly, suddenly feeling a hushed quiet in the hall. Standing up I took my books and began walking away from the Slytherin table.

"Where are you going?!" Draco yelled after me.

"I'm thinking about my reputation, I can't be seen dead with the likes of a big headed jerkwad!" I said as I stuck my hand up and waved it. "See you later!"

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Luna and I sat behind the castle, digging for jasmine roots for the final part of our potion, my pale hands were covered in dirt as I attempted to pull out a large enough portion of the root.

"You shouldn't fight with your brother, Lia..."

"He shouldn't have called you Looney Luna."

"Yes, but he is family, family is meant to annoy one another-"

"You're apart of my family too, Luna, you're my best friend."

She quietly knotted the ends of the roots she found before placing them into a cotton draw stringed bag. "And you're apart of mine, Lia, you know that."

"I just... Luna, I'm tired," I say quietly as I stopped digging and stared into the hole in the earth. "Dad started talking about matches for me at Christmas lunch. Mum is excited because she gets to choose who my match is with, but I'm only a kid. I don't want to think about marriage, I want to focus on my schooling!"

"I think it'd be romantic if you met your soul mate through the match."

"Fat chance, my soul mate is either dead or he's parading around in Australia with cute surfer girls."

"I can't wait until we go on our trip!" Luna suddenly says.

"As soon as we graduate it'll just be me, you, and cute surfer dudes!" I say, smiling to myself as I remember our future trip to Australia.

"And the Pharlax Ignia!"

"That's if we can even find it," I agree with a nod. "How do you think I can get back at Draco for making a scene at breakfast?"

"You could out a - Hermione!" Luna shouts as she begins waving like a maniac. Looking up I see the golden trio standing in the courtyard amongst a few others, one being my brother.

"Hey Luna, what are they like?"

"Who? Oh! Hermione is really nice and smart, she can answer any question I have about potions. Ron's nice too, he's really funny and always plays chess with me in the library. Harry's nice, he always stands up for me when others make jokes about me."

Tilting my head a small spark of a idea flickered in my brain.

"Which one do you think I'd get along with most?"

"Hmm, probably Hermione as she's on the same level as you about potions."

"And romantically?"

"I suppose Harry, he'd challenge you and you always liked a challenge... Why do you ask?"

Smirking I stood up and waved my wand, cleaning the both of us before I began making my way to the golden trio. "Oi! Potter!" I yelled while waving. Luna scurried after me while I can hear her begin to panic.

"Potter! Yeah, you!" I point at him as I wandered over to the confused group. "I wanna talk to you!" I shouted.

"Uh, okay?" I hear Harry say while he stared at me weirdly. Once again all eyes were on me and no one was talking.

"Hi Oliver," I waved as he stared at me in confusion.

"Hi Lia, you haven't almost killed yourself from flying on a broom stick, have you?"

"Only a couple times," I wave dismissively before I tilted my head and looked at Harry. "Harry, I know I'm not from the best family, and I know you probably hate my guts, however I want to let you know that I have liked you for awhile now..." I trailed off as I hear someone choking in the distance. "But, there's no use not ever knowing, so, will you go on a date to Hogsmeade with me?"

Harry stared at me with a blank face. "Sorry, I think I heard wrong there, what did you say?"

"You," I point to him. "Me," I say while pointing at myself. "On a date, the next Hogsmeade weekend?"

"Uh..." He looked at me before his eyes flickered behind me, probably at the red face Luna who was attempting to breathe normally and my brother, who no doubt is matching Luna's red faced. "Umm..."

"Yes!" Hermione suddenly yelled. "He would love to, Lia!"

"I would?" Hermione elbowed Harry. "Ow! I mean I would!"

"Harry, it's fine if you don't want to-" I start to say before he cut me off, a faint red blush appearing on his cheeks.

"No, it's okay, I want to go on a date with you, I'm just shocked you asked at all."

"Oh..." I say, a bit surprised he actually said yes, "Okay then... Meet you here at ten then?"

"Sounds good to me," he says while scratching the back of his head in embarassment and awkwardness.

"Yeah... Me too! I'll, uh, see you then!" I say before I turned and walked into the school corridor. After a few moments Luna caught up to me.

"Did you just-"

"Yeah!" I say looking at her with red stained cheeks. "I can't believe I just-"

Luna laughed. "Looks like the Wrakspurt has made another fool out of you, Lia!"

I groaned. "Did Draco look mad at least?"

"I thought he was about to curse us all," Luna says blissfully before she side eyes me. "Do you even like Harry?"

I paused for a moment before shrugging. "I never really spoke to the guy, so I'm not sure," I lied, knowing full well that I always found amusement in his interactions with Draco. "Either way, dad's going to be pissed when he finds out," I bit the side of my tongue before we turn the corner of the corridor and began making our way to Myrtle's bathroom.

"Did you-"

Luna held up the bag of roots and I nodded. "Okay, let's do this," I say while linking my arm up with her's.

Did I just do something stupid? Probably.

Will I regret it later on? Most likely.

Will Draco's reaction be a reward for what's to come?

Most definitely~

#harrypotter #lunalovegood #dracomalfoy #malfoy #harryxoc #imagine #littlesisterlylove #slytherin #gryffindor #hogsmeade #date

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wvrmtails · 5 years

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( and what loneliness is more lonely than distrust? )

( keiynan lonsdale, twenty one, agender ) my goodness, is peter pettigrew back? it’s been a few years since the halfblood has been around the castle, but i’d recognize he/they anywhere. rumor has it the seventh year spent the past few years aligned with the order. they’re stillallocentric & cunning and obsessive & passive, though. and the gryffindor still reminds me of ketchup stains on band shirts, an incomprehensible minute long string of curses, tracing the veins in your wrist, the smell of breakfast and fresh coffee, card tricks at three in the morning. well, then, i guess some things never change.

links: playlist. pinboard. stats.

triggers: child abandonment, eating disorder (specifically bed/bulimia), depression, anxiety, weed. there’s a heads up before every bulletpoint!

history.

child abandonement mention | peter grew up in glasgow, scotland and was raised by his mother, a halfblooded witch called daraja pettigrew. his dad wasn’t in the picture, hadn’t been from the moment his mum had told him that she was pregnant. | end of mention

which meant peter learned how to be alone from a young age. his mother worked a lot, after all, so she could pay the rent of their small flat and give peter the bare minimum, the things he needed. peter delved into fictional worlds: he read books. comics, mostly, but also a lot of roald dahl. he also watched a lot of telly, because tv is the bomb.

went to muggle elementary, where he was kind of? an odd one out. his clothes were always a bit lumpy, his words a bit jumbled, his eyes shifty. was an outsider on good days, a target on less good ones. he spent many lunch breaks eating alone, and most of the time he didn’t mind — being alone meant he could let his mind wander.

still, it fucked with his self esteem. no kid likes feeling alone, or like an outsider.

and then hogwarts rolled around and! friends! marauders! peter felt so at home! oh my god okay listen. he loves the marauders so much and he was so hyped and happy to be part of this little group and there was a Lot of hero worship there, esp in the early days?

peter always loved heroes. he loves comic books and people who save the day and get the girl and do it all. i think he kind of … projected that onto james and sirius especially? did not know how to do this friendship thing as an 11 year old tbh, was a mess, was blinded by their amazingness damn

also. re: being sorted into gryffindor! peter admires heroism and bravery and chivalry, and it’s your values that get you sorted some place. and he does try to be brave, and he IS, because he becomes a damn animagus for his bud! i mean! he was not a hatstall btw — i choose to ignore that stupid bit of post canon. it took a while for the hat, sure, but no more than two minutes.

pete was & is a shit student, not bc he was dumb, but just because school was not. his thing. his jam. the system was just not for him. deadlines? exams? homework? no thank you. anyway, peter’s skills flourished a lot more in different settings, like … using charms for convenience. or becoming an animagus for his bff. making potions against hangovers. etc.

becoming an animagus for remus was ! important ! to peter ! he did it for remus, not because of peer pressure, or anything else — he did it because it was right, and his friend deserved it and ! he did it, too, because he could. sure, his transfig grades may have been more than poor, but the kid did have some skill. he just needed motivation, which mcgonagall didn’t give (bc. she scared him.) and this situation? motivated the hell out of him.

peter would be lying if he said he wasn’t taken a bit aback when he learned about remus’ lycanthropy — not because he was scared of him, to be honest, but he was just ? shocked ? he was more scared for remus, and so sad? so fucking sad for him? : (

collects chocolate frog cards like it’s his damn job. i mean, he did it before hogwarts, but once he arrived and there was more opportunity to trade and a whole club dedicated to it, peter grew more and more driven to complete his collection, lmao. peter also really likes playing gobstones and is pretty good at it? same with chess & card games — he loves games!!!! so much!!!

weed & anxiety tw | peter started smoking pot in the summer between his fourth and fifth year, and never really stopped. it made him slack more at school, but also eased his anxiety, which had started to develop in his fourth year. as months passed, peter became more and more of a stoner, which made him both more relaxed and funnier, but also ... a whole of a lot lazier. | end of weed tw

peter had always been a bit ... fidgety, easily on edge, a bit nervous, but he’d never really known anxiety until around fourteen years old. his insecurities grew, as he started comparing himself more to his friends and finding nothing but things he lacked in comparison to them, and questions as to why they put up with him. | end of anxiety tw

so his schooldays mostly looked like ... doing nothing, playing games, having fun with his mates, getting high, forgetting his homework, stressing about homework, and somewhere, in a tiny corner of his being, worrying about the war. whenever those worries started coming up, though, he was able to push them away, because the war was not yet there, not for him at least. there was graduation to worry about first, and once that was done, then he could worry about the war.

and then the war came to hogwarts. peter was shocked. peter had been in denial about the war and how close it could hit him, because in his mind he and his friends would be safe at hogwarts, would be safe until at least graduation, and then that was all gone. peter didn’t do much during the battle. i can imagine that he just hid, that he tried to stay out of trouble, that a side of him showed itself that he did not like at all. he worried about his friends, hoped they were safe, but didn’t go looking for them, didn’t try to protect them: he clung to safety and hid. like a fucking coward. he prayed, for a moment, and then cursed god to hell and back. probably smoked a few cigarettes, too.

post battle & currently.

peter is ashamed. ashamed of his cowardice, ashamed of his passiveness, of his incapability to stand up and fight, like so many of his friends did. a disgust grew in his chest for himself, and yet he was glad, somewhere, that he had hidden. he’d not seen as much as others had. he’d not gotten hurt. he had not died.

he did join the order, along with his friends, in an attempt to make up for his earlier lack of bravery, but he finds himself incapable to do much. he’s not good at dueling and while he’s able to be strategic and cunning, his mind seems to shut down whenever he tries to apply himself. he’s terrified, frankly, and he’s angry, because he should just be at fucking hogwarts.

that idea i mentioned earlier, that the war wouldn’t be real until after graduation, and then graduation being postponed significantly, kind of froze peter up. rather than dedicating himself to the order in his own ways, as he would do in a canon verse, or eventually deciding to walk over to the death eaters, peter just became passive. i think peter hung around hq a lot, cleaning up and cooking food and making sure there was always enough tea/coffee/beer/liquor around for when there were meetings. would rather clean a dirty toilet than go on a mission. The Order’s personal MAID!

depression & weed & eating disorder (bed/bulimia) tw | peter feels useless. he feels like a shitty person. he feels like he’s a burden. he hates himself. peter starts secluding himself, hiding in his mother’s home. he smokes more pot. he sometimes goes a week without seeing someone besides his mum. he watches too much telly and reads comics and drowns in fictional worlds and he becomes depressed. he sinks into it without noticing and can’t come back from it. his eating habits ( which have always bordered on unhealthy ) turn worse; peter binges, and then restricts, falls into a cycle. it’s the only routine he has.

when he’s around his friends, he lives up a little. he cracks jokes and wants to play games and laughs and feels a bit more alive, but he always craves his time on his own. that’s his new way to feel safe: to stick to his newly found routine, hidden in his room, away from reality. | end of tw

and then, finally, he was able to return to hogwarts. the three years spent away from school feel like a blur, if you ask him now, a useless blur, and peter’s laughing when he steps on the train. he’s glad. he’s glad. he can return to his plan to graduate and then, maybe, find the power in himself to face the war, rather than still, kind of, deny it. peter just wants to return to his last year and make the most of it, and return to the way life once was. ( that that’s kind of impossible is, well, yet another thing he’s in denial about. )

random facts & ramblings.

peter parker is his favourite superhero just because ... they share a first name and because peter parker is a bit of an underdog too and peter is just like! amazing! he named his owl parker.

he hates cats. used to love them --- he was allowed to take the cat from home with him to hogwarts when he was eleven, but he brought him back home after an unfortunate incident where his cat nearly ate him while he was in his animagus form. “sorry ma, i don’t love him any more. here. have him.”

peter is actually a solid cook. this is because he learned to make some basic food when he was still a kid, first with his grandma, and later on his own. he liked doing it for his mother and he was. .. good at it? peter is also just passionate about food and finds comfort in cooking. breakfast food and baked goods are Prime Food Categories.

he is asexual af, panromantic. has kissed both guys and gals and nb pals but did not like it??? confused. does not understand sexuality and all that jazz but tries not to think abt it because like! he’s got enough stress! doesnt need to think abt this!

peter is also agender, but i think he’s a lot less aware about this, because it’s confusing and so he just tries not to think about it. he does feel okay with he/him pronouns, but just doesn’t feel connected at all to being a boy/man

peter has abandonment issues because his dad, well, never even bothered to be there. not even for a second. he’s just constantly scared that people will leave and it’s funny, because he will probably end up abandoning all of his loved ones KDJFHSDF.

peter is quite non confrontational but also not ... meek? he just avoids it, either by physically staying out of people’s way or by dismissing most of the things said and getting out of there. a Passive Kid. will, however, defends his friends honour, because damn it, he loves them so much.

he’s such a fucking dork i swear to god. but he’s funny! peter is really funny. i deeply believe in this. he makes great puns and is able to just come out of nowhere and make a comment that just. hits the nail right on its head.

peter curses a lot and has a scottish accent and sometimes he will have a minute long cursing session that no one rly understands.

listen i have such a wide array of hc’s im not going to list them all here just ask me

possible plots.

tutors. someone help peter graduate bc that is like. something he does want to do. he’s taking his newts in transfig, potions and herbology.

fellow collectors. please trade chocolate frog cards with peter and help him finish his collection before he loses his gd mind.

let’s play a game! peter rly likes playing games and tbh he’s usually in for one ( though it does depend on who you are, lmao ) so! maybe your character and peter just like hanging out and playing some Games.

i will add more im just so tired of typing rn KSDFHSJKDFHKJSDFKDSFH

#totalusintro #this got long akjdsfh

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stunudo · 6 years

Text

Along This Long and Winding Path

A Criminal Minds Fan-fiction

Featuring: Spencer Reid x the BAU team

Setting: Season 14

A/N: This is day two of my 1k Follower Grab Bag of Fics. But when I saw the formula for this day I knew it was going to be an angsty mess. Reid with Team Unity/ Wheels Up in the future. This is one way I could see the cliffhanger of season 13 being resolved, you all will probably hate me. Also, this somehow turned into a case fic. xoxo Stu

Spencer Reid had a barrel of a gun pointed at his head, his gun pointed back. If he shot her, Penelope could die, if he didn’t he would be taken prisoner into the very cult that had kidnapped his friend and fellow genius. Though the decision appeared to be containing two options, his mind began factoring all the variables, giving seemingly endless possibilities. Penelope’s voice was muffled behind the car window, “Shoot her Reid!”

Penelope Garcia, a peace loving and nurturing analyst was asking him to shoot someone. She had saved him all those years ago in a Texas hospital room, he wouldn’t let her be in danger now. Protocol be damned. He holstered his sidearm and surrendered. Suddenly the dream faded away and he woke up to face a new day.

Chief Emily Prentiss had been sitting silently at her desk for an indeterminate amount of time. There were cases piling up and there were reports due out, but her mind and her attentions kept floating off. Her sense of duty had be quelled these past few months leaving room for distraction that only masked guilt. There was a knock at the door, JJ’s cool blue eyes tried to hide her empathy.

“Kevin sent us a text to meet in the round table room,” JJ stayed in the doorway. “You ready?”

“Of course, sorry about that,” Emily closed the folder that was open on her desk, one she hadn’t even realized she had opened and stood to follow JJ to the conference room.

Kevin Lynch stood awkwardly in front of the group of profilers until JJ and Emily were seated amongst them.

“Alright, it’s a bad one,” he started, his joker grin lost on his swallowing features. “We’ve got seven sets of human remains found in the woods outside of Boise. There has been flooding in the area and that is why they were discovered. Local sheriff’s office puts the most recent body at six months, which is still tentative given the state they were in.”

“So we need to determine if there is still a threat and profile from there,” Emily added, glancing at the evidence photos on her tablet.

David Rossi was in the market for some real estate in the Bay Area, looking forward to spending more time with Kai and Joy now that he was retired. His wives and his retirements came in threes, apparently. He unconsciously checked his phone as the realtor showed him through the third overpriced yet charming house of the day. He couldn’t turn off his agent senses, but he also didn’t want to interrupt a case. He shut off the phone to stop himself from scratching the itch.

“Mr. Rossi, can you believe this kitchen?!” The realtor gushed.

Spencer Reid made his way to the day room, having slept through breakfast. He didn’t mind, he could have a cup of coffee from the nurses station, but all the sugar in the place couldn’t make it satisfactory. He found Thomas at the card table, just like every other day and silently sat down.

“Didn’t think you’d make it out today,” the man’s gruff voice disproportionate to his small frame.

Spencer’s voice was soft and slow to reply, “Some days are worse than others. Did you still want to play?”

“Why not, let them wait on us for group for once,” Thomas grinned his crooked teeth and began setting up the chess pieces.

The roads were nearly impassable and yet the BAU got to the crime scene before noon. Simmons and Alvez wore backpacks while JJ and Emily had utility belts on. Tara thought they all looked ridiculous and was instead taking pictures with her phone to send to Kevin. The bodies had been left in the position they had been found until their arrival. The mud making any close inspection nearly impossible.

“How long until we can get them to the coroners’, Agent Prentiss?”

“We don’t need much longer, given the state of the area we would be more harm than good at this point,” she explained.

“JJ, come look at this,” Alvez was crouched down over the body of a young woman.

“Those look like defensive wounds,” JJ was confused.

“She was clawing at herself like that?” Luke suggested.

“The unsub may have been using a burning agent or some kind of hallucinogen,” Tara leaned over to look at the most in tact body. Emily and Matt both shared a look when the last word was said.

Group was the hardest part of his day, but also the one he looked forward to the most. It wasn’t therapy, but it was conducted like it. It gave the staff an excuse to get everyone together before lunch was served and also brought the long term residents some socialization. The quickly rehabilitated patients were the most talkative during the sessions, but Spencer made it a point to seek out those who were less keen to share.

The introverts that didn’t seek the recognition or the attention of the group were his people, but that didn’t stop him from focusing in on one extrovert’s contributions day after day.

“How is everyone today?” She grinned her lopsided grin from her chair. “I know the weather is all over the place right now, but the courtyard is starting to see some fresh growth. You guys should really check it out.” Penelope saw some hands raise and she pointed with her right hand to pick on the next person to share.

Spencer and Thomas had entered the cafeteria, Thomas’s walker was sliding on tennis balls with faces drawn on them. His bright eyes watched Penelope as she giggled at the story someone had shared.

“Prentiss, the id on this victim flagged in Vicap,” Simmons handed Emily his tablet with Kevin’s email.

“Carol Murray. She was an unsub?”

“A victim, from Tallahassee.” Simmons pointed to the information on the screen.

“That’s a long way to move a body,” Prentiss added.

“According to the file, we worked the case,” Simmons.

“Jayge, do you remember a case in Florida, apparently there was a string of shootings for organ donors?”

“Yeah, what’s it have to do with these bodies in Idaho?” JJ’s face was in disbelief.

“One of the bodies was a victim you and Morgan saved on the case.”

“So, we going to talk today, or are you going to keep watching me during Group?” Penelope had wheeled over to him during lunch.

“Garcia,” Spencer whispered, giving her a dejected look.

“Oh, don’t Garcia me, Reid,” Penelope’s voice was nearly back to normal, her speech pathologist was thrilled with her progress. What Spencer hadn’t warned her therapist was how much natural practice she had talking.

“I know what you’re going to say, but I am not ready to hear it,” Spencer pushed his instant mashed potatoes around his tray.

“When will you be ready? When I am back to work? When I can strut around in platforms again?” Penelope clutched his forearm. “Hey, look at me Boy Wonder.”

Spencer sniffled and patted her manicured hand on his arm.

“Those things might not happen--”

“Penelope, you are making great progress--” She put her finger on his interrupting mouth.

“They might not happen, so just in case. I forgive you. You, Spencer Reid, who did precisely as I asked and shot that traitor on the spot.”

“Penelope, I can’t accept that, not yet.”

“Well, tough, because I am going to tell you every chance I get.” She grinned at him, shaking her head with attitude.

Emily stood in the conference room at the local police station, she stretched her neck before addressing the team.

“They’re sure?” she asked Alvez who had just returned from the coroners’ office.

“There was no trace of anything in their systems, but some of these bodies are beyond evidence collection.” Alvez explained.

“If this is who we think it was, there wouldn’t be traces. The question is, why here? Wouldn’t he want us to know he was targeting the victims we saved?” Simmons asked.

“We need to call Spence, this can’t just be a coincidence.” JJ crossed her arms in her folding chair.

“Reid has refused to consult in the past, what makes you think he would help now?” Simmons asked in a low tone, he was hopefully curious.

“You tell him or Penelope it’s Scratch and they will be here or the bat cave.” JJ was staring down Emily’s ‘we shouldn’t be having this conversation face’.

Emily’s head snapped back and it hung there staring at the stained drop ceiling tiles. “I do not want Garcia on this, not yet.” Emily gave in.

Spencer’s afternoons were full; he saw some patients twice a week and others only once. The road to his personal recovery started with getting his therapist’s license. He wanted to be able to approach his trauma and doubts from every angle, it led him to helping others accept and process their physical injuries and restrictions. Garcia called him her caretaker, when she wasn’t flirting with the orderlies.

She was one of a handful of patients he didn’t see, ensuring he wasn’t blurring any lines between who were his patients and who were his friends. She wouldn’t have cooperated if he had tried to make an appointment with her in the first place. He was taking notes over the last ten minutes of the hour for his final patient of the day, when the landline phone rang on his desk. He had forgotten he had a direct line at the facility.

“Dr. Reid?” He answered.

“Spence?” JJ’s voice, of course they had her call him this time.

“JJ, how did Henry’s potato battery go?” He was ignoring the professional urgency in her voice.

“Uh, fine, he wants to try other food next. But, that’s not why I called.” Spencer’s mouth ticked, he thought for two seconds before biting his lips and exhaling.

“What’s the case?”

“You’re not going to like it.”

“As long as it is not a cult, I may be willing to help you out.”

“We think we found one of Scratch’s contingencies.”

“Where should I meet you?”

Penelope grew alarmed when Spencer didn’t say goodbye for the day, he always slipped her a Dum-Dum or a new trinket going into the weekend. He claimed it was for her muscle control, but she knew it was because he loved her. Which meant that his disappearing act was only because he had been taken away by someone or something else he loved.

Diana and the team battled inside her mind for the bigger dangers, she quickly wheeled back to her room and got her tablet out to Skype Kevin at Headquarters. His look of shock and dismay at her timing told Penelope she was on the right track.

“Penelope, hi, so nice to see your face,” Kevin gave his fakest smile ever.

“So, Kevin, remembering that I have, in fact, seen you naked. How long is it going to take to convince you to send me whatever my babies are working on?”

“Penelope, you are on medical leave, I am legally not allowed to share work with you or jail, all of us, jail.”

“Yeah, but think of all the juicy details I could share about you on the interwebs,” Penelope cooed.

“You’re hacking in remotely? How are you even doing this?! Not to mention that facility doesn’t have the speed for this?!”

JJ and Alvez met Spencer at the airport, Luke drove while JJ went over their findings. Spencer felt oddly comfortable in the standard issued SUV, despite not having been in the field for months.

“So your two theories are this was Scratch working a different angle or an unsub who was specifically targeting the BAU?”

“Pretty much.” Luke turned into the hotel’s parking lot.

“Have all of the victims been identified?”

“All but two, dental records on missing persons are taking a while,” JJ shrugged, clearly Kevin was a not Penelope.

“And those bodies that were identified all had ties to the team?”

“Uh, yes, though some of them are three degrees from Kevin Bacon, if you know what I’m saying.” Alvez added, sliding from the driver’s seat.

Spencer’s face constricted in to confusion, “The victims are tied to an actor?”

“No, Spence, it’s a pop culture game, ignore Luke.” JJ clucked, it was good to have his innocent side resurface after so long. They headed into the hotel for the night.

In the morning, there was word that the park rangers in the next county found a body near a cabin. Simmons and JJ went to check it out for connections. Meanwhile, Alvez, Lewis and Prentiss went over the victimology for the bodies from the mass grave with Spencer. Emily felt him doubting them and she couldn’t help but hold out hope he was right.

“Besides Carol Murray’s scratches, are there any other indicator of the use of fear or self harm?”

“Bernice De La Pena had defensive wounds, but nothing as extensive as Carol Murray’s.” Tara answered as Emily handed over photographs of the arms on the other woman.

Alvez’s phone rang, “Uh-oh, you too?! Let me put you on speaker.”

“Hey guys,” Rossi’s voice called out into the meeting space.

“Rossi?” Spencer’s voice hitched in surprise.

“Is that the kid, I knew something was up. What you got Emily?”

“Possible Scratch side attack, we’re probably jumping to the wrong conclusions, but we couldn’t be too careful.”

“That must be why Garcia left me those ominous messages. Anything you need from me?”

“Rossi, do the names Bernice De La Pena, Courtney Sanders and Stephanie Marx mean anything to you?” Tara recited from the list of identified victims.

“Not off the top of my head, should they?”

“One of the victims was a previous save for us, Carol Murray, but we aren’t seeing direct connections.” Emily continued.

“That’s why you brought in Reid?”

“One of many reasons,” Emily smirked at Spencer, he looked away. She held the phone, “We should get back at it, but we’ll keep you posted.”

“See ya, Rossi,” Luke took his phone back. “So, what are you seeing Reid?”

The body that JJ and Simmons were sent to inspect had clearly died of an animal attack, but the sheriff insisted they check out the cabin too. With little progress where the team was holed up, they decided to entertain the locals with a walk through. It was a simple, yet well decorated vacation home, it had running water, generator procured electricity, and a wood burning furnace. Matt glanced at JJ and they followed the deputy around back to the cellar.

Inside they knew they had made the right decision, there was no other word for it’s purpose than torture room. There were photographs of various women and animals pinned in different positions. JJ swallowed hard as she spotted Carol Murray’s face in unimaginable pain. Matt was already on his phone to Prentiss.

Emily closed her eyes, “Oh, thank God.”

Alvez and Spencer waited until she was done with the call before realizing their worst fears were unfulfilled. Mr. Scratch was not behind these murders.

“Spencer, I’m really sorry that we dragged you all the way out here,” Emily explained as she started gathering her things to head to the cabin and continue the investigation. “Luke will take you to the airport from here.”

“The case isn’t solved, Emily. If it’s alright with you, I would like to finish the profile. Especially since the unsub remains at large.” Spencer replied, he didn’t need to be rescued or sent away. Luke grinned, but tried to hide it as Emily’s face melted into secretively pleased.

“It’s good to have you back, SSA Reid,” Chief Prentiss nodded.

“It’s still Doctor, Emily,” Spencer smirked as he secured his messenger bag over his shoulder.

“You’re damn right it is,” Tara’s nose scrunched up and she patted him on the back.

The elevator inside FBI Headquarters still smelled the same, Spencer noticed as he was wedged beside his former teammates. They had registered him as a consultant with special clearance if he ever changed his mind about leaving the job. So with his special pass around his neck he stepped out into the familiar bullpen. It looked the same, even his desk remained untouched in his absence, the fact caused him mixed emotions.

Kevin came storming from the tech office in a near fit, “Chief Prentiss, hi, uh, I just want it, on the record, that there was nothing I could do. I couldn’t restrain her, she’s already partially paralyzed.”

Slowly Penelope made her appearance, “Oh boo-who, Tech Boy here couldn’t keep me from making sure my team was alright. Emily is not going to slap you with a sanction, Kevin.”

“But I could slap you with one,” Emily threatened.

“Moi?”

“Yeah, violating medical leave and hacking government servers,” Emily suggested, playing tough.

Everyone let the scene play out, though they were all bursting with laughter. JJ looked away while Luke and Simmons swallowed it and stood tall. Tara was as ever, unflinching. Spencer’s face was confused, “How did you even get released from the Rehab Facility?!”

“Oh, sweet, pure, Reid. Mama has her ways,” Penelope sighed. “Besides, there are medical transport vehicles available on Uber and Lyft. I got a ride in no time. Now, whose driving, because Rossi is waiting on us with the kettle on.”

Spencer wished he had the unstoppable optimism of Penelope, but when he looked around the room at the faces of the BAU team he felt nearly hopeful. His decision to walk away from this group of unwavering loyal and dedicated people was not one of selfishness. He regretted it and was certain of it in equal measure. His choices had caused his friends almost insurmountable pain over the past few years, had cost Stephen Walker his life and Penelope her ability to walk. His decision to teach and volunteer at Penelope’s Rehabilitation Facility had been the first choice he was proud of in a very long time. However much an act of penance it was.

The food was phenomenal, as always and the conversation was kept light. Rossi had some great stories about Kai and trying to find a place to live in the most ridiculous real estate market in the country. Penelope was beaming with her freedom and friend time. Tara and Luke were bantering as always, apparently the last blind date he had set her up with was a nightmare.

Emily approached him as JJ and Matt ducked out to head back to their families. “You know, you could work part time, like Tara.”

“Emily, I would have to be reinstated and I don’t think I am ready to have my gun back on my hip, just yet.”

“So what you’re saying is maybe?” There was a devilish glint to her eye.

“What? No, stop putting words in my mouth.” He smirked, she had him on the ropes and he knew it.

‘We don’t always have a choice in what happens to us, but you know what sometimes we do. And right now, I’m just asking you to make the choice to stay.” Emily said back verbatim.

“Fight for us, fight for the team.” Spencer continued, his voice a whisper as he recalled those words pouring from his own heart.

“It’s what we do.” Emily finished. “I know you’re not ready. You won’t even let Penelope forgive you. But, don’t give up on us, just yet. We haven’t given up on you.”

Spencer sighed, his tears burning as she looked back at him with the years of cases and personal loss behind them. “Okay.”

@dontshootmespence @illegalcerebral @literallyprentissstwin @cherry-loves-fanfic @mentallydatingspencerreid

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woozletania · 6 years

Text

There’s a raccoon in my tower, part 8 (end)

There were new rules. Rocket didn't like them much.

It was Thor who fetched the beer after the little group broke into Rocket's lab and talked him down. Nebula didn't drink, Tony was a teetotaler, and Pepper just sipped as the god and the raccoon got drunk together. They both had a lot of sorrow to drown.

Thor recovered first, and while Rocket was still woozy they hashed out the rules. They were as follows:

Rule One: Rocket had to drop the damping fields and let Friday into the lab. This was to enforce Rules Two Through Six.

Rule Two: No more planet killers. If he needed to build something that destructive he could wait until the new labs in the asteroid belt and Lagrangian points were operational. If he wanted that done faster he was welcome to help.

Rule Three. He would budget no less than six hours a day for sleep. He could split it up into naps or one long doze but six hours was a minimum.

Rule Four: No more recycled food. He would eat no less than two meals provided by the staff a day and at least one had to be outside the lab.

Rule Five: He had to shower no less often than once a week. Were he human it would be once a day, but he didn't sweat. He still got dirty and smelly, but a shower a week about covered that.

Rule Six: Not counting mealtimes, Rocket had to come out of the lab for at least one uninterrupted hour per day. He could do what he wanted, but it couldn't be in the lab. Joint work with others during this time was allowed.

Rocket griped about wasting time he could better spend working, but even he knew his current work habits weren't healthy and he soon knuckled under.

After much grumbling he agreed that his first venture outside the lab in three months would be to attend a lunch and meeting with Tony, Bruce, a few other tech savants and (via telepresence) Shuri to discuss improving Earth's space defenses.

It was a strange meeting. At first Rocket just ate like a famished animal and ignored everyone, but his ears pricked up as projections and diagrams displayed the work in progress. The very first thing he said was blunt and surprisingly helpful.

"No," he growled as the orbit plots for the yet-to-be-constructed orbital defense platforms were displayed. "Three in a rosette is not enough. You need two low orbit and three high orbit just in case anyone gets past the outer forts. Otherwise you may end up firing at your own planet." He snatched the remote from Tony and quickly sketched out an orbit plot for the two groups of satellites.

Shuri blinked curiously from her holo. "Oh! That is good. But isn't there still a moving window in the orbit where someone could sit in a blind spot?"

" 'Course there is," Rocket snapped. He mellowed as he spoke, though. "That's why you put mines there. Basic planetary defense."

He was clearly happy to be engaged by minds at his own level and bit by bit, over the next week, his reluctance to come out of his hole faded. They no longer had to roust him out of the lab for the lunch get-togethers and three days later, without being prodded, he started coming out for dinner too.

Over that week his appearance improved markedly. His thin fur filled out, the sunken circles around his eyes disappeared, and the tremor in his hands faded and was finally gone. He gained at least a couple of pounds and on his little frame that showed. He was sleeping, and eating. Friday made sure of the one, and his new eagerness for - or at least tolerance of - social contact saw to the other.

Under ironclad orders to treat their newly social mechanic well and aware that there was far too much work for their present workforce, the staff happily welcomed the furry little techie. Rocket seemed surprised and even a bit grateful to receive such respect and other than growling at most (but not all) attempts to pet him he soon settled in, for at least a few hours a day, as part of the team.

He also heard the arcade games in the rec room, and drawn in by the sound, started spending some time there. Rocket proved to be completely lethal with plastic guns, unbeatable as a pilot, and amazing at every game that wasn't DDR. Because Rocket couldn't dance worth a damn.

Tony found him there one day and introduced the little raccoon to chess. He beat Rocket easily the first game, won a long war of attrition the second and watched with astonishment as he was destroyed in the third.

"You've played this before," Tony said as Rocket's little clawed fingers plucked a knight off the board. One of Tony's knights, naturally. "Quill taught you, right?"

"Nope. It's basic tactics. And y'know, I was built for tactics." Rocket shrugged. "I just think eight, ten moves ahead."

Tony morosely moved a bishop. Rocket instantly moved a pawn one space forward. It didn't look like a threatening move but Tony wasn't fooled.

"I'll get your other Kymellian next," Rocket said, and touched Tony's remaining knight. "Six moves 'till I get your Supremor." He pointed a claw at Tony's king.

Tony considered the board position. He was pretty sure it was hopeless. He was only mildly interested in chess but that didn't mean he was bad at it and he'd never been dismantled by a beginner before. It just went to show what intellect lurked in that little raccoon skull. The prickly, socially awkward raccoon was brilliant...but not in all ways.

For example, he was a lousy liar.

"You did it on purpose," he said as he considered his next move.

"What, took your Kymellian?"

Tony looked up from his pieces. "You knew I'd see the suit and wonder about it. If you'd wanted to keep it secret you could have hidden it like you did when you wanted us to think you were asleep. Put a hologram over it."

"Dunno what you're talking about, Stark. Everybody makes mistakes." He pushed another pawn. Tony could see what he was doing now, leaving his remaining pieces fewer and fewer safe places to move. Another move or two and Tony's queen side defense would collapse.

Tony sat back, the game forgotten. "Rocket, I've spent months looking at your work. I respect it, and you. So please do me a favor and stop assuming I'm an idiot. You let Nebula and me see the suit. You knew I'd call Thor and what would happen when I did."

Rocket studied the board for a moment, then sighed and sat back as well. "All right, Stark. You're smart for a humie. Especially with this crap tech you have to work with." He sat and pondered for a moment before going on.

"I'm pretty sure I am right. Nothing's gonna work except maybe this warp overload. It may get Thanos. But I figure even that's got a ten, maybe fifteen percent chance of killing him."

He looked up. "So yeah. Maybe I do want you to talk me out of it. I'll give you a chance. You got a year. If we don't have my gang of idiots back by then, or a good shot at it, I'm still doing it. You don't have to go with if you don't want. I won't hold you to it. Or the pirate angel. Nebula is gonna come whether I want her to or not. But alone or in a group, I won't hesitate to die for just a chance to take out the guy who killed my friends."

And that was it, the grim center of it. Even when Rocket was smiling, thankfully not as rare an event as it once was, he still missed his family.

So Tony, and Shuri, and Banner, and Pym, and all the others they called in, sat around the table with Rocket and hashed it out. They worked on Earth's expanding space presence, on planetary defense, on infrastructure, on making a planet work with half the people it used to have. And they worked on ways to get to Thanos. They'd find a way.

"I'm pretty sure I'm right," Rocket had said. That only made Tony more determined to prove him wrong. He'd get Rocket's family back. He'd get everybody's family back, no matter what.

One hurt little raccoon locked in a lab had driven home the fact that Tony wasn't the only one who lost something when Thanos snapped his fingers. And now he'd work with the raccoon and everyone else to fix it.

Because if he didn't, Rocket was going to go off and die in an almost certainly futile effort to kill Thanos. He wasn't the only one. Now that he had access to galactic news he knew that every time an empire found Thanos's newest hidey hole they threw everything that had at the Titan and promptly took massive casualties.

He'd heard the argument that Thanos was right. And there were some civilizations that did benefit from their losses. But populations would continue to grow and sooner or later Thanos would do it again. More broken families. More lives lost on an incalculable scale.

It was accept an unseen, but very present universal despot or fight. Tony was going to fight. It only took one little raccoon holed up in his tower to convince him that it was not just the right, but the only thing to do.

#Rocket Raccoon #tony stark

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peterpcrkcr · 6 years

Text

How Embarrassing

Peter Parker x Reader (shifting pov from Peter to the reader)

Words: 4.3k +

Summery: Ned sets Peter up on a date with your friend. You’re jealous but you don’t know why. You’ve never met Peter, and this isn’t the first time she’s gone out with someone from your school. Peter isn’t super thrilled about the date either, and then when he sees you he feels a yearning he’s never felt before. Slow burn, baby.

“So... did you text her?” Ned said with hope in his eyes as he looked on at the profile of his best friend’s face. Peter shook his head, Ned scoffed. “Come on, Peter. It’s been two years, I think it’s time you try to talk to another girl that isn’t your aunt or Michelle.”

“Why does it matter if I text her or not?” Peter said as he shifted the textbook in his arm forward to place in his locker. “We both know I have better things to do than text someone I’ll never get to spend any time with.”

“Okay, dude... you’re not getting it. We’re halfway to winter break and you’re lonely as hell. Summer had you beat, but at least you were busy training. You need someone. I can see it.” Ned stepped closer to the set of lockers to make room for someone with their skateboard heading for the doors.

“Can you? ‘Cause I don’t feel lonely as hell, man.” Peter grabbed his backpack and pulled a single strap over his shoulder. He shut his locker and blinked when it clicked. Ned rolled his eyes. “And what does it almost being winter break have to with anything?”

“I’m just saying you’ll have a lot of extra time on your hands, and there’s not enough crime in all of New York to keep you busy like you want to be.” Peter faced Ned and clenched his jaw just slightly in thought.

“I have you!” Peter said releasing the tension hanging in the air. Ned let out a loud burst of laughter, making peter smile. “I don’t need to text anyone!”

“Peter. I have Cindy. You need someone.” Ned said setting his hand on Peter’s shoulder. For a moment it almost sounded like people were talking about him, but Peter shook it off and then shook Ned’s hand off of his shoulder. He walked forward down the hall toward the doors and Ned fell in step. “We could double date.”

Peter shook his head and sighed lightly. This was a regular conversation between the two of them. Ned always brought up this random girl Peter had never met because she doesn’t go to their school, but Cindy knows her and she’s great so of course he just has to meet her. Peter didn’t really feel interested when Ned described her. And during team meetings when Cindy would mention her, Peter only half listened.

Ned pushed the doors open for them to pass through together. The air was fresh and sparking with something Peter hadn’t felt before and couldn’t even begin to describe. It made him stop midway down the stairs and turn just enough to see Ned from the side of his eye.

“What? What’s happening?” Ned asked with a fast voice in a high pitch.

“I’ll text her.” Peter said with his eyes shut, voice defeated. Ned clapped and held his hands up to his mouth in happy surprise.

“That’s great! I’ll tell Cindy and we’ll plan a date!” Ned said as he pulled his phone out. His fingers tapped the screen at a stupidly fast pace. Peter shook his head and crossed his arms, almost annoyed.

“You’re more excited about this than I am.” He said as he pulled his phone from his pocket. Ned shrugged and kept chipping away at his phone. Peter tapped on his screen a couple times, took a deep breath and exhaled quickly to show his annoyance. “Sent.”

“Awesome. I’m gonna call Cindy.” Ned lifted the phone to his ear. “I’ll text you later!”

“But you were just texting her!” Peter called after him, but Ned just offered a wave over his head as a goodbye.

Peter let out a hard breath and ran his fingers through his hair before crossing his arms. Someone coming down the stairs bumped into his elbow, which made him drop his arms and apologize awkwardly. His phone chimed and he took a long while to decide whether he wanted to read it or not. It had to be from her, but he could have cared less. He wasn’t trying to be rude, he just wasn’t interested. For as excited as Ned was about this, Peter had to try. That’s why he pulled the phone out, read the message, and composed another, slightly longer, message back to her.

She giggled and it almost made you move around the bed in a hurry for a peek at her phone screen. Instead you slowly raised your eyes from your notebook with a quizzical look in your eye.

“Who is it?” You asked in your most relaxed voice ever.

She was always getting texts from people. Even though you didn’t care about the conversations she was having, you were still curious as to why her screen was always lit and yours was black. Was your phone even on? You tapped the screen and when it lit up with the time and the background picture you’d had on there for months you sighed. No love for you and billions of emoji kisses for her. It wasn’t jealousy because you cared about your friend. It was melancholy for all the people you had yet to message and had yet to be messaged by.

“This guy from Midtown. He wants to go on a date.” She said, eyes glued to her screen. You nodded your head.

“Of course he wants to go on a date... have you even met before?”

“No, and this is the first time we’ve ever talked.” She said it like it was commonplace. You scoffed a quiet laugh and went back to studying.

“What’s his name? I might know him.” You asked sitting cross legged on her extremely soft duvet. She shrugged.

“Uh, Paxton or something like that. I don’t know...” she wasn’t really listening to you.

“Is he a senior?” You asked looking up from your notebook again.

“God, (y/n), I don’t know!” She said annoyed. You raised your eyebrows in surprise. “Like I said we just started talking.”

“Well if you find those things out let me know and I can scout him out tomorrow for you.” She nodded her head.

“Yeah, sure. Whatever you want.” And then she tapped on her phone aggressively for a quick moment before setting it down on her lap and looking at you with furrowed brows. “Actually no pepperoni.”

“What?” You asked amusedly.

“You’re ordering a pizza right?” She glanced at her screen and then locked it when you glanced down. “I don’t want pepperoni on at least half of it.”

“I wasn’t ordering a pizza.” You said, but her attention was gone again.

This prompted you to walk out of her bedroom and into the hall so that you could place the pizza order in peace. When you returned to the bedroom she was sprawled across her queen bed as much as she possibly could have been. Your notebook pages slightly bent, from her knee moving over it. She apologized half heartedly as you removed your things from under her to move to her desk across the room.

“So when’s your date?” You asked, trying not to sound as interested in her life as you really were.

“Friday.”

“That’s fast.” You said tapping the end of your pen against your notebook.

“Yeah, I know his friends’ girlfriend from Girl Scouts years ago and she’s super excited.”

“Cindy?” You asked. She nodded with a smile.

“Yeah! Cindy.” She glanced up from her phone and tilted her head at you. “You’re a really good listener!”

“I try to be, especially when-“ but her attention was gone again and you smiled because you cared about her even when she sometimes forgot you were there.

F R I D A Y

His name is Peter Parker and even though it sounds familiar you just couldn’t put a name to the face. Was he tall? Short? Did he smile more than he frowned? Did he play sports, or was he in chess club? Does he like ice cream on cold days and coffee on hot ones? Did he see a picture of your friend and fall in love on the spot like they usually do? And would he think /you/ were pretty if he saw you absentmindedly rummaging through your locker when school started in the morning? Had you seen him before?

Throughout your classes you painstakingly listened during role call. You tried to overhear conversations in the halls between periods as if his name would pop up casually and then he’d yell ‘hey it’s me peter parker and I’m going to date your friend tonight!’ That didn’t happen.

During lunch you say with your usual group and scouted the cafeteria for someone who looked like a Peter. Even when you thought someone looked like a Peter, you knew you were getting it wrong. Your friends asked you why you were so distant, and you said you had an essay due for a class that didn’t exist and they didn’t ask anymore questions after that.

All day long you ignored your classes and focused on the mystery date. You imagined someone average height with brown hair and blue eyes. You thought of someone with nice hands and a cute smile. You imagined a person who listened really well and someone who would ask you how your day went for once because he truly cared to know.

“Excuse me, (y/n).” A random student tapped on your shoulder, forcing you to turn and face them.

“Uh, hey.” You tucked hair behind your ear and sized them up. “How do you know my name?”

“We have economics together third period.” She flicked her blonde locks over her shoulder and sighed. “Betty...”

“Oh, yeah.” You inhaled. “I’m so sorry Betty, I’ve just got a lot on my mind today.”

“Yeah, I know. You dropped this.” She said holding a phone up to you. You shook your head. “No messages.”

“Thanks Betty.” You said, gently taking it from her hand and putting it in your back pocket.

“See you tomorrow.” She said with a polite, and very practiced smile on her face. “Try not to forget me.”

“I won’t, I- I didn’t meant to.” Betty nodded and squeezed her eyes closed with that smile plastered to her face just before walking away.

You relaxed your shoulders and furrowed your brows when you realized that you had been unnecessarily tense during that entire interaction. She just really unnerved you, and that was genuinely terrifying considering she was tiny. Maybe that added to the horror.

When the school bell rang you hung around for a bit in hope on catching the mystery date. You stuck around while the office staff left the building, and until the first club was let out. After the Shakespeare club dramatically fled into the hallway for a scene you made your way out. The halls were empty otherwise and you heard absolutely no mention of any Peter, nor any Parker.

You pulled out your phone and contacted your friend the only way you knew how to.

Didn’t find him today. Sorry.

She messaged you back a split second later with a million pink and thumbs up emojis.

that’s ok I’m meeting him in like 30 minutes , let u know how it goes !!

“Of course.” You said slapping the phone against your thigh before putting it back in your back pocket. “He’s going to take one look at her and fall in love. Will she even care? She’s just doing this for fun, but that’s what dates are for anyways and why am I even worried about this! Why do I even care! I don’t know him and I never will so I should shut up and let her enjoy an evening out with her friend and a cute guy. If he’s even cute. If he’s even nice. You know what? Of course he is because she always gets the cute ones to text her! How do I do that! Why am I jealous! Why am I talking so mu-“

While you rattled off your thoughts which, admittedly you should have kept to yourself, someone came by and pulled your phone from out of your pocket and started jogging away.

“Hey!” You yelled as you took off after them. They had their hood up and wore gloves so you had absolutely no idea what they looked like. You only knew that they were taller than you so they ran much faster. “Slow down asshole!”

But when they rounded the corner and went out of sight you heard a loud crashing sound. It was metal and bodies and grunts and then the hiss of something wet against something hard creating a pressure release.

You huffed around the block and set your hands on your knees to regain your breath before you looked up and saw none other than Spider-Man with your phone in his hands. You looked over his shoulder to see a man webbed to a bunch of dented trash cans.

“No messages?” Spider-Man asked as he handed the phone over to you. You rolled your eyes and scoffed.

“Yeah. I know.” Your voice was so harsh it made him shoot his hands up defensively. He chuckled. You blushed.

“Hey! No judgement. I’m just surprised because you’re really beautiful. Beautiful girls always have tons of messages.” He said this so coolly and so seemingly honest that your mouth gaped open.

“You- you think...” You stuttered and he nodded once before slinging a web across the way and into an alley.

“I’m kind of in a hurry, but I’m sure I’ll see you again.” He winked a masked eye and flung himself across the busy street and out of sight.

“I can’t believe that just happened.” You whispered to yourself as you clutched your phone in your hand.

You were lost in your thoughts the rest of the way home. When you arrived you heard on the news that Spider-Man had stopped robbers from jacking a money truck making a pickup at a bank.

When you sat down in your bedroom and kicked off your shoes, your phone buzzed. You sat down on your bed and laid back, sighing as her name lit up your screen. It was a text, and a photo.

He’s super late, but he’s here now, and he’s super cute!

And she was right. He was super cute. He had brown hair, and a nice smile. Deep and warm brown eyes instead of blue and that was almost better because it meant he wasn’t perfect. The way he looked into the camera was almost like he was looking right at you, and that made your skin heat up.

You were super jealous until you remembered that Spider-Man himself said your were beautiful.

While you laid down in the silence you pretended that it was actually Peter that had called you beautiful instead of a masked, and completely unobtainable, superhero. And then you fell asleep.

Peter tucked his phone in his pocket the moment she walked through the doors. Her hair was up in a ponytail and her cheekbones were shiny and he suddenly thought, this won’t be so bad. And then she walked up to him and right before he said hello she looked down at her phone and sent off one last text.

“Sorry about that...” She said as she tucked the phone into her little purse. He shoved his hands in his pockets and shrugged.

“It’s cool.” He said, but it wasn’t. She didn’t really care if he thought it was cool or not, she just hated things being awkward and they were both extremely grateful when Cindy and Ned walked up to greet them. “Ned, thank god man.”

“Hey, Peter.” Cindy said with a smile. Peter grinned back awkwardly but charmingly. In a way that would’ve made his date find him cute if she hadn’t been pulling her phone back out of her purse. “Jessica!”

“Hey Cindy.” Jessica said as she pulled Cindy into a one armed hug. Jessica waved at Ned and he tipped his head toward her politely. “I haven’t seen you for like, two weeks.”

“Yeah, I guess I’ve been pretty busy with Ned and all my AP classes.” Cindy squeezed Ned’s hand comfortingly. He smiled at the feelings and Peter moved his eyes elsewhere. He didn’t want to jump the gun, but him and Jessica were not about to be that close anytime this evening.

“You two are too cute, let’s get a pic all together.” Jessica flicked her hair off of her shoulder and then wrapped her arm around Peter’s shoulder. He smelled a really nice perfume and let himself enjoy this one thing he’d noticed other than her beauty. He wasn’t trying to be shallow, it was just sort of happening.

She took the picture right when he decided to smile and that made her smile. She could send it off to her friend and then leave her attention to the group for the rest of the evening. When she sent it off she knew that the receiver would be jealous in the way her eyes squinted almost evilly. Peter noticed and his smile fell away.

Every second he thought things were going well he would be reminded of why it wasn’t with the buzzing of her phone.

“Who are you texting?” Cindy asked with a straw between her teeth. Jessica shrugged. Peter looked at Ned with desperate eyes.

“I was texting my friend (y/n) from Midtown where you guys go, but she must’ve fallen asleep.” Jessica tapped her screen a couple times. “Now I’m letting my dad know that Peter is being a perfect gentleman. Almost too perfect.”

“Oh my god!” Cindy said laughing, Ned chuckled. Peter tried to smile but instead sunk lower into the booth with a grimace on his face.

“What does she look like? We might’ve seen her around before.” Cindy said leaning over the table for a chance at a glance at Jessica’s phone.

“One sec...” Jessica said while she thumbed through photos in her phone. Peter watched out of the corner of his eye at the many different faces that flew by. She took a lot of extremely flattering selfies and he thought that if he looked like her that he would do the same. When she stopped on a picture of herself with the mystery (y/n) standing side by side, Peter’s eyes widened. He had seen her before, hours earlier.

“No... I don’t think I’ve seen her. Is she new in town?” Cindy asked as she took the phone from Jessica’s hands. She tilted the screen toward Ned, but he shrugged with pursed lips.

“No, I think she’s gone there for a couple years. She’s more into the humanities than sciences. Her parents forced her into Midtown when she tested really well on some dumb Chinese test as a middle schooler.” Jessica took the phone back from Cindy and turned it toward Peter. “You know her?”

“Uh...” Peter said while his eyes focused on every detail of her face. The curve of her eyes and the way her hair framed her face in the most perfect way. He saw the warmth in her eyes and heard the annoyance in her voice. He thought about how he would’ve rather had her sitting next to him than Jessica, and that made him blush. He didn’t know her. He’d only spoken to her once and she didn’t even know it was him so really, they hadn’t met.

He shook his head and sipped his soda and then as Jessica and Cindy talked about girls in their old Girl Scouts troop and what they’re up to today, he leaned back against the cushion and crossed his arms. That mystery girl was on his mind. He tried to remember the way her fingers felt as they brushed over his, but the suit really ruined that with its smooth fitting. He tried to imagine what kind of evening this could have been if she were here instead and it actually made him feel better about staying. When Jessica spoke he pretended it was the mystery (y/n) and how he’d stare like an idiot whenever she parted her lips.

How embarrassing.

He walked Jessica home after their long goodbyes from Ned and Cindy. She talked the whole way there and then when she stood on the steps to her townhouse, she smiled at him and took a deep breath. He raised his eyebrows because she was certainly about to say something.

“I’m sorry I talk so much.” She said softly, slowly. He relaxed his shoulders and let out a slow breath. This is not what he had expected and it made him red with resentment. Maybe he should’ve enjoyed the venting better than he had. Maybe he shouldn’t have pretended she was someone else the whole time. “You’ve been so great, Peter.”

“Oh, uh- thanks. You were great too.” He said half heartedly because in all honesty he didn’t really know anything about her other than she’s really pretty and has a lot of friends.

“So...” she held the strap of her purse in both hands. He glanced at the shiny necklace as the light danced over it. Her neck while she swallowed. She was beautiful. He shook his head just slightly. “Text me?”

“Uh, yeah. Sure, yeah.” He said stepping toward her. She grinned happily and then he watched as her eyelids started to close. “See ya.” He said as he jutted a hand out for a handshake.

“Oh, okay...” she said taking his hand and shaking it formally. “See ya.”

And then Peter waited for Jessica to close the door behind herself before almost running away to go home.

When he got home, Aunt May was reading a magazine on the couch.

“How’d it go, Stud?” She asked teasingly, and also curiously and lovingly.

“It could’ve been better.” He said honestly while he kicked off his old shoes by the door.

“What would have made it better? If it was just a one on one date with you and Jessica?” Aunt May turned to better face her precious nephew. He pulled orange juice from the refrigerator and poured himself a glass. He chugged the full glass and then let out a soft burp. She laughed, he apologized. “Well?”

“Honestly May, if it had been a different girl.” He said quietly. She shook her head.

“What’s wrong with Jessica?”

“We just didn’t click.” He said rinsing his cup out in the sink. May nodded and licked the backs of her teeth knowingly.

“Oh, click huh?” Peter nodded as he faced the sink and washed the plate his aunt had used to eat her dinner. “Or was it because you didn’t want just any other random girl but someone in particular?”

“It’s not that-“ He said quickly as he shut the water off and started to dry his hands.

“Then what is it?” Aunt May asked, resting her chin on the palm of her hand.

“Uh...” He said looking around the room. He put the hand towel back on the oven handle and leaned against the counter. He crossed his arms. He sighed. All the while May looked at him with raised eyebrows. “Okay, maybe it is that.”

“Pete’s got a crush! Just like when he was younger!” She stood up and walked toward him to pull him in for a hug. He kept his arms crossed defiantly even though her hugs were really spectacular. “I’m so happy for you, my nephew. My handsome nephew. My genius nephew. So when do I get to meet your crush?”

“Uh, I’m not sure. I still need to meet her first.” Peter said as his aunt pulled away to look at him curiously. He shrugged. “I sort of talked to her as Spider-Man so I’ve met her, sort of, but she hadn’t met me.”

“That’s insane. You fell in love with someone you saved, what’s that called-“ May crossed her arms and leaned on the counter across from him.

“I’m not in love, May.” He scoffed, swept up some dirt with his sock. “You know... on this group date I felt really out of the loop. It didn’t seem like we were going to get along at all. She talked the whole time about things I wasn’t clued in to. She talked about her past but in an exclusionary way. Like I wasn’t supposed to know who or what she was talking about but that I was definitely supposed to be listening to her anyway. And then when I walked her home something weird happened. Jessica apologized for talking so much. She said I was great. I think she expected me to kiss her but I shook her hand...”

“Florence Nightingale Effect!” Aunt May exclaimed. Peter’s eyebrows shot up like a rocket. Then her attention settled back onto Peter and she looked confused. “You shook her hand?”

“Yeah, I shook her hand.” He said. “Were you listening at all? What’s that?”

“I was baby! I was! It’s when a savior falls in love with the person they saved... also I just, was also not listening a little bit to what you were saying pleasedon’tbemad.” She said in a rush. He grinned. Shook his head.

“I’m not mad.” He smiled. “I’m just disappointed.”

“I see what you did there.” Aunt May said while she poked his shoulder. Peter raised his eyebrows up and down with a smile on her face and she laughed. “You should head to bed. There’s crime to be stopped and you’re the only man for the job!”

“I thought you hated when I went out.” He said stepping toward his bedroom. Aunt May shrugged.

“I’m mostly hoping you see that mystery girl again and fall in love and give me some little babies to take care of.”

“I’m 17, May.” Peter said stopping in his tracks.

“Yeah, and I’m not saying you have to have babies right now, just eventually.” Aunt May gripped his shoulders and squeezed them reassuringly. He walked forward into his room and kissed her cheek before closing the door shut.

Peter laid down on his bed and closed his eyes and the only thing he saw behind his eyelids was you.

#long boy #peter parker #peter parker x reader #peter parker x you #peter parker imagine #spiderman #spiderman imagine #spiderman x reader #spiderman x you #imagine #slow burn #ned leeds #aunt may #cindy moon #jessica drew #hggg i know some might be out of character lol #ignore me fools

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evenstevensranked · 7 years

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#43: Season 2, Episode 10 - “Devil Mountain”

Ren’s Life Science class goes on a field trip to observe some birds. Yay? Drama ensues on the trip when we find out that Mandy “Always-Gets-Her-Man” Sanchez has a crush on Bobby Deaver. Yikes!!! Elsewhere, Tom gets a personal pizza oven in his room, which is the only reason Louis and Twitty are bothering to hang out at his house. Basically, Louis is a horrible friend to Tom until the last 5 minutes. WHYYY?!

This episode opens with Ren and Bobby doing homework at The Stevens house. They’re always so incredibly awkward. Like I’ve said before… Bobby Deaver is kind of weird. I don’t get the appeal. He seems very aloof and spineless to me. They’re about to kiss when Steve comes waltzing in on the phone.. which is highly uncomfortable. He becomes a nervous wreck and ends the phone call by saying “Okay I’ll kiss you tomo— SEE YOU tomorrow!” Oh, man.

We find out that he was on the phone with their teacher, Ms. Lovelson. They’re in the same bird watching group and Steve is going to be guest-lecturing their Life Science class. I’m suuure that will be an embarrassment free experience for Ren! (Sarcasm.) Steve basically does everything in his power to keep Ren and Bobby from kissing now. He interrupts them constantly, makes them snacks, and sits riiiiight in the middle of them while telling boring stories. He starts to give Bobby the third degree asking him all sorts of personal questions. There’s a bit where it cuts to a black and white interrogation sequence parody. I always thought this was pretty funny.

“FOR THE LAST TIME, DEAVER! GIVE ME THE INFORMATION!”

“Alright… I have a sister… *cries*”

Now, on to the subplot! Tom got a new (giant) personal pizza oven in his room per Doris’ recommendation. Yes, Doris! This is the first time Tom ever speaks of his mom. Louis is confused and asks, “…Doris?” and Tom explains “Mother. She’s worried I don’t socialize enough with kids my own age. Which is nonsense” while simultaneously playing online chess. It’s pretty great.

“AH-HA! Trying to take my bishop! I know you too well, Mr. Smarty Trousers...” - Tom is a GIFT and the whole reason this episode isn’t ranked lower.

In hindsight, I really feel like this show gave kids very unrealistic life expectations at times. Apparently I can bring a butler to school with me, and I can make my principal quit their job and turn school into one big party. There’s no way my mom would allow me to have a freaking PIZZA OVEN in my room. First of all… why would you want to eat pizza in your bedroom anyway? Crumbs. Ew. This is the episode that made me assume that Tom is rich. We get to see his room though, which is cool! Much like Twitty’s, I feel like they got the characterization correct here as well. I seriously love that they actually put work into stuff like that. All of the rooms we’ve seen so far highlight the character’s personality without hitting you over the head with their interests. For example, this made me realize that Lizzie McGuire barely tried sometimes. Gordo was very into film, directing, and old records. So guess what they plastered on his wall?! It feels very contrived:

In contrast.. here’s Tom’s! Very neat. Nerdy paraphernalia on his shelves. Something that looks like a pin-up model poster right above his head. Why does that seem extremely accurate to me?

Everything’s chill and then… *dun, dun, dun* The pizza oven breaks. There’s a tiny detail that I love here. Louis dramatically touches inside of the pizza oven and quickly bounces back all shocked when he feels that it’s cold. It’s just really funny to me. But, yeah. The pizza oven is dead. And ya know what that means!!! ...Louis and Twitty suddenly don’t care about spending time with Tom. Ugh. They immediately peace out and Tom is left all depressed and alone. Wow.

The next day at school, Louis is trying to tell a joke to some kids at lunch when Tom comes over all excited with good news (presumably about the pizza oven.) He keeps interrupting Louis by adding funny remarks that ultimately just annoy everyone around him. I feel so bad. The bell rings before Louis is able to say the punchline. So what does Louis do?! He starts yelling at Tom. “What’s so important?! This better be good news about the pizza oven, because right now I’m in no mood.” SERIOUSLY LOUIS?! Well, Tom catches on and can clearly tell they’re just using him. So, he goes and does what I’d do: He lies and says the oven will be broken indefinitely.

Ren and Nelson are waiting for Steve to show up for their Life Science class. (Btw: Every time I hear “Life Science” all I can think of is LIFE SCIENCE EXTREME from Ned’s Declassified, where they took baby dolls and strapped them to rockets.) Ren insists that it won’t be too embarrassing, because Steve “happens to be one of the area's foremost authorities on the Dickcissel" — with extra emphasis on “dick.” The innuendos are too much this season. Nelson laughs.

Just then, Ruby comes rushing over to run her latest gossip column by Ren. It’s here that we find out the oh so devastating Junior High news that Mandy Sanchez has a crush on Bobby Deaver. It’s kind of ridiculous because she says “I’m really sorry, Ren! Should I kill the story?!” as if it’s a serious piece of journalism. Like, do schools even allow gossip columns like that?! I’d be absolutely mortified if “Brittany Butler has a crush on ____” was written up for the entire school to read without my permission. Mandy is super preppy, fake and snobby. She’s played by Bianca Lopez who funnily enough plays another preppy, fake and snobby character in The Princess Diaries named Fontana! A member of Mandy Moore’s popular crew of cheerleaders.

Here she is making heart eyes at Bobby...

...and there she is on the left making fun of Mia. She literally plays the EXACT same character here with the same condescending, high pitched voice and everything.

Anyway, Steve ends up being thoroughly embarrassing. Who would’ve guessed?! We get a montage displaying just how embarrassing. It starts off with him making the class pronounce “Bird” slowly, as if it’s an entry level English as a second language class. Lord help me. The montage ends with him emotionally saying “And there he was… A Yellow-Bellied Sap Sucker… actually sucking sap.” Yep. The Yellow-Bellied Sap Sucker. Disney's favorite bird. I’ll never forget the time they mentioned it on Lizzie McGuire, as well.

Steve invites everyone to go on a field trip to Devil Mountain to observe the migration of… some bird, idk. It’s not important. When he asks who wants to join him, Bobby is the first one to raise his hand with genuine excitement. (I told you he’s weird.) So naturally Mandy, Ren, Ruby and Nelson decide to go, too. This should be interesting.

While walking home, Louis and Twitty pass by Tom’s house and notice him sitting outside chowin’ down on some cheesy pizza. And we get this incredible exchange:

Twitty: “Hey, Gribalski! Thought you said your oven was gonna be busted for a year!” Tom: “Oops!! Guess I made a boo-boo!” Louis: “Is that any way to treat your friends, man?!” Tom: “This hot, delicious pizza is for people that care about me — and not for two faced pizza pigs like you! NOW GET OFF MY PROPERTY!”

I love Tom so much. He proceeds to sassily whip some crust at them before running into his house with a mouth full of pizza. I honestly think Tom is my second favorite character after Louis.

After coming home from food shopping, Eileen notices that Louis sneakily rang up $150 worth of frozen pizza. Wow, what a great kid he is in this episode! Needless to say, Eileen ain’t happy. He says “Look, I’m on a 4-slice-a-day habit okay? So, let’s preheat the oven to 450 and discuss this in a calm and reasonable manner” which is actually a pretty good line, lol.

The next day on the hiking trip, Steve has the kids break off into pairs to explore. He ends up pairing Bobby and Mandy together, and pairs himself with Ren. Of course. Ren and Mandy end up being extremely passive aggressive to each other and are low-key fighting over Bobby right in front of him. (See cover image of the post) Bobby clearly notices and just… walks away. This is what I mean about him being spineless. He just blows with the wind.

While paired off with Steve, Ren spends her time spying on Mandy and Bobby with her binoculars. This clearly isn’t a healthy relationship, lol. Then again, what Junior High “relationships” are?! Deep down, Ren obviously must not trust Bobby. I mean, I’d be pretty angry at Mandy’s flirty behavior too. But it takes two to tango!! Bobby’s just going along with it. Again, spineless.

Ren and Steve have a falling out when she yells that she’d rather be with her “BOYFRIEND instead of up here watching stupid birds with you!!!” The Stevens kids are not their best this week, lol. When storming off, Ren unknowingly heads down the “Devil’s Backside: DANGER!” trail. (Also, “Devil’s Backside”??? Wow.) While wandering around lost, Ren almost falls to her death in the most hilarious way:

She’s clearly just standing on one leg and flailing her arms around in front of a green screen. Amazing.

She lands holding onto a brittle branch. Even though she could very well die at any moment.. she still whips out those binoculars again to spy on Bobby and Mandy. Priorities.

The branch breaks and she falls even further. Thankfully, Steve finds her. They have a heart-to-heart and make up. So, that’s nice. This plot ends with Steve separating Bobby and Mandy on the ride home so Ren and Bobby can be together. Bobby claims he missed Ren all day and felt like Mandy was crowding him. Okay. Sure. I don’t trust this guy either. But, yeah. That’s it for that.

Louis calls Twitty and Tawny in for an emergency meeting to brainstorm how to get revenge on Tom. Tawny isn’t impressed and heads straight for the door. Same. She asks them if they even know anything about Tom or care about him. Like the fact that he’s currently representing LJH in their regional chess meet. Obviously, they didn’t know because they’re awful friends. They seem remorseful, but then Louis gives us this gem of a line:

youtube

It’s incredibly funny out of context, but in context it’s just extremely immature and flippant. Tawny says “Louis, no one can disappoint me quite like you can” and leaves, which marks the turning point for Louis here. That’s one thing I really like about this episode. It took Tawny’s disapproval for him to realize how terrible he was being. It just goes to show how much he cares about her and values her opinion.

Cut to Tom’s chess meet. Louis and Twitty show up and turn it into some lively, obnoxious sports event. Complete with painted chests and D-Fence signs. I’m sure this would never fly irl, but it’s a really nice gesture in the Even Stevens-verse. They cheer Tom on the entire time, until he eventually wins! Yay! He gets a great final line, too. When asked the classic “You’ve just won… What are you gonna do now?!” question, where an athlete would typically reply “I’M GOING TO DISNEY WORLD!!!” Tom says, “I’m gonna go get my windbreaker.” I love this. I have said this before and people literally looked at me like ???

One other great thing about this scene is in the final moments of the meet. Louis is sitting with Tawny anxiously awaiting the outcome… and she just glances at him — proud of his decision to be a good friend in the end. They’re so cute.

The end!!

In conclusion, Tom is most definitely the greatest thing about this episode. Since he’s a supporting character, I thought I’d rank this one a little higher than I might’ve otherwise because he deserves the love!

I adore the ending with Louis showing up and being supportive of Tom, and that little look from Tawny. It almost makes up for Louis being generally awful the entire time. The Ren/Bobby/Mandy love triangle isn’t totally bad, though! I live for petty teen drama, tbh.

If you’ve been quietly checking out the blog, I encourage you to chime in via Disqus below if ya like!!

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letterstoocean · 7 years

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my ocean,

more re writes of our story....

“You never told me why you always chew on rose stems.”

“I thought I had.”

“Nope. The last time you started we were interrupted; and every time you tried to pick the conversation back up you were cut off. It was kind of funny. Remember? You were drunk and walked outside mumbling about how conversation was a dying art?”

“Oh yeah. Conversation is a dying art, by the way. Let me get a new drink then I’ll try to tell it. That story tends to choke me up so I’m not telling it without one.”

“You gather your thoughts. I’ll grab the drink.”

“And shots!” I yell as she walks in the kitchen.

She returns with a fresh cocktail and two shot glasses full of red absinthe. We drink the shots and I sit back.

“Okay, where to begin. Hey, write this down or record it. I don’t think I want to tell this story more than once.”

She hits record on the tape recorder and sits back, legs tucked under her for warmth.

“Where to begin? Where to begin? Actually, I should begin with two very nice old ladies that ran a small bodega in Pearland, Texas…”

Rose Stems and the Black Queen

The only time I ate was at school. So if I skipped school I didn’t eat. Didn’t stop me from skipping school, I just had to find different ways to get food.

I was walking to school when I ran into a group of bullies that had been tormenting me since I arrived in Pearland. Bullies always have a leader and as I walked closer to them he smiled in anticipation of either chasing or catching me. I saw him mouth to his buddies, “look who it is.” So I ducked into the first door I saw. They stood outside and waited; all good bullies know not to start anything in a building. Grownups always break it up or inform their parents.

I turned around, saw that I was in a small grocery store and looked around while waiting for them to leave. Eventually, one lady came out from behind the counter and asked if I needed any help. I’m not sure why but I pretended to be deaf and dumb. The lady gave me a sincere smile, grabbed a pen and paper and wrote the question down again. I wrote back that I was hungry but not sure what I wanted.

She wrote back, TAKE WHAT YOU WANT SWEETIE.

I grabbed one of the homemade sandwiches from the cooler and fumbled around in my pockets pretending to look for money that wasn’t there.

DON’T WORRY ABOUT MONEY. YOU COME BACK WHENEVER YOU ARE HUNGRY.

Every day after school I would stop and write a poem for them or give them a drawing and they would feed me. All the while I pretended that I was deaf and dumb. I wasn’t mean to the ladies. I never took more than they offered but I did feel guilty about what I was doing. It didn’t stop me from doing it. I was hungry; and the bullies would never follow me into the bodega.

One day before school, the bullies were chasing me and I was nowhere near the bodega or the school so I ran into a Safeway grocery store to hide and to wait them out. I decided to make myself a sandwich while I was in the store and as I opened a bag of Wonder Bread to get a couple of slices I heard a woman behind me yell “hey!” Startled, I jumped and spun around expecting an employee to pounce on me. Instead it was one of the ladies from the bodega. “Oh shit!” Then I realized that I had jumped when she yelled. I ran out of the store and through the group of kids waiting for me, knocking two of them on their asses as I did.

I honestly believe that I ran faster from that lady than I ever ran from the kids. I really did hate lying to her and now I was caught. I didn’t want to face that fact. It wasn’t like the lady was going to chase me out of the store.

I ran in the opposite direction of school; since the bell would ring soon the bullies broke off their pursuit. I slowed down enough to walk into a barbershop to hide.

Never run through a doorway.

Always walk in with some sort of confidence.

Confidence is a damn good weapon to have.

Running through a doorway into someones world lets them know you are scared and don’t care if they know it.

That’s a secret you can’t afford to let out.

The lessons that Gary: The Convict Next Door (another story for another time) taught me rang in my head and I stood in the doorway and smiled.

“Have a seat, yard ape.” Said a leathery old man sharpening a straight razor on a white belt attached to the barber’s chair.

Sitting in the chair was an old black man with a mess of white hair and matching sideburns. He had a black pipe clenched between his teeth and white smoke drifted from between them.

Next to the big bay window that looked out on to the street, two men sat at a table staring at the pieces on a chess board. One of them looked exactly like the man sitting in the barber chair. The other man was white; he wore a black suit with a string tie like the jazz musicians wore in New Orleans. He was very tan with long black hair that was showing some gray. He had it tied back with a leather cord. A small stick stuck out of his mouth and twitched from one side to the other as he stared at the chess board.

I looked at the door thinking maybe it was better to run after all; but after a moment, I decided old smoky men were safer than young angry bullies and walked over to the bench.

“Relax, we’re all friends here.” Said the black man as he moved one of the chess pieces and then sat back and lit his pipe. “So what brings you to the barber shop? Since you should be in school?”

I began to elaborate one of the many lies that just seemed to roll off my tongue; instead I shrugged my shoulders and looked at my feet.

“I’m going to guess it was those other yard apes chasing you up and down the street all the time.” Said the long haired chess player.

“Yes sir.”

“Well,” said the man moving a chess piece and sitting back, “You’re safe here.”

The barber stopped shaving the man and took a long look at me. “Is that him?” he asked going back to his task at hand.

“That’s the little artist. Not a very good actor though.” Said the white guy. He looked at me, the small stick held between his teeth. “The ladies know you aren’t deaf. Felt sorry for you. I can see why. Seen you wearing those same clothes for a month now.”

The barber brushed the seat off, put a smooth white board across the arms and smacked it.

“Have a seat, get that mop cut. Name’s Clive. What’s yours?”

“Christophe, and I’m sorry, but I don’t have any money.”

“Didn’t ask for any. Now hop up here.”

As Clive worked his way through hair that hadn’t been cut in two years I watched the two men play chess.

“The black man is Anthony. His twin over there is Timothy; call him Tim.” They both nodded at me. “The crusty Italian is Giovanni.” Clive said as the scissors snipped away.

“What are you chewing on?” I asked Giovanni.

“Don’t be a yard ape and maybe I will tell you.”

“What’s a yard ape?” I asked through pursed lips as Clive cut my bangs and little hairs fell on my lips.

“You are.” He replied.

“All done.” Said Clive pulling the cape away with a swoosh and brushing the hair off my neck with a very stiff brush. He brought a jar full of Dum-Dum suckers down from the shelf, opened it and offered me one. I took a green one, said thank you and returned to the bench.

I quietly sat watching men come and go. Some received haircuts; others sat on the bench chatting with me. Around noon a large woman stopped by with a gigantic pot of spaghetti and meatballs. She set the pot down on a TV tray that was stored in the back room. She counted the number of men and got as many plates. She scooped out lunch and passed it around.

Then she looked over at me above the rim of her glasses. Sniffed, scooped some spaghetti out, looked me up and down and scooped some more. She thrust the plate under my chin, “someone should have been feeding this boy. Look how skinny he is.”

The plate had to weigh five pounds as I set it on my lap and dug in. Halfway through my meal my stomach felt like it was going to burst. The other men were taking their empty plates to the large woman to be cleaned. I looked around for some help and no one looked me in the eye. The woman shook a finger at the plate and I kept going.

Somehow, I finished it all and wound up falling asleep on the bench. I didn’t hear the woman leave; I didn’t hear people come and go. I couldn’t remember the last time I slept that well.

I felt a hand shake me awake as a voice laughed.

“Wake up, yard ape. Time to close shop.”

I sat up rubbed sleep from my eyes and looked around. The lights were out and Clive stood at the front door with keys in hand. Giovanni stood over me smiling.

“My sister’s pasta has killed men. If it didn’t kill them it made them meet their god. Never seen a yard ape finish a plate the first time. You stick around and she will kill you or make you strong enough to take care of those that chase you. But for today it’s time to head home. Where do you live and I will give you a ride.”

I automatically began to lie. I never told anyone where I lived in case they wanted to talk to my mom. Since she was never home they may put two and two together and wind up putting me in a foster home or worse. I stopped myself and told him I could walk home.

“I need to walk the food off.”

“I don’t believe you. Tell me where you live or I’ll let Tressa feed you another plate.”

I told him.

For the next week I hung out at the barber shop. I didn’t have to worry about school calling home because we didn’t own a phone and I didn’t know where mom was so there was no worry there. They never asked about school. They never asked about home. They fed me; they let me read what I wanted. They didn’t ask questions. Every day at noon Tressa showed up with a pile of food. Some days she would bring a jug of wine that had orange peels in it. It had to be the sweetest best tasting thing I had ever had in my life.

I didn’t think about school or the bullies. One day before Giovanni arrived Clive told me that they knew one of the kids parents and Giovanni had one of his talks with them.

“His talks can be very persuasive. I don’t think you have to worry about those kids anymore.”

Giovanni began to teach me how to play chess. He was very patient as he taught me; usually allowing me to make the mistake, taking my piece, and then explaining how I messed up. He reminded me a lot of my Uncle Robin. One day when Giovanni and I were setting up the board. He paused, “Christophe, Tressa is here. Help here bring in the food. I’ll set your side up.” That was the first time he didn’t call me yard ape.

Clive and the Giovanni were the only people in the barber shop that day. I don’t think a single person came through the door until Tressa showed up. She greeted me with a big wet kiss on the cheek and then shoved a box that smelled like Italian heaven into my arms. She followed behind me with a small plate covered with a silver dome.

She grabbed one plate; Giovanni coughed and held up two fingers. Tressa raised an eyebrow but said nothing and made the second plate. We ate in silence, I felt I shouldn’t say anything until an adult did and the adults said nothing. Clive left with Tressa and it was just Giovanni and me sitting at the chess board.

“Never interrupt a respectable elder when they are telling a good story.” He put the stick back between his teeth. “Remember that. Now then, you are not family. But you are an old dying soul in a very young dirty body. I’m dying and perhaps it is this fact that lets me tell you this story.”

He tapped the table with his hand, staring at the chess board; gathering his thoughts before he spoke. He did this all the time.

“We all fall in love.” He held up a finger. “Once.” He took the stick out and held it between his fingers. “My love was Canda. We met in Italy as teenagers. We fell in love, we danced and we married. We were going to grow old together.”

He grabbed the black queen off the board and turned it slowly in his fingers.

“I took over the family business. We moved to America. We became rich. Every day of our lives together when I came home from the killing and corruption, I would pledge my love for her and give her a rose.”

He grew silent and kept turning the queen around in his fingers.

“She died, didn’t she?” I asked, knowing the answer.

“Yes, yes, of course she did. All good love stories have a death in them or they would not be good love stories.”

He passed the black queen over to me and gently slid the rest of the pieces off of the board.

“You win.” Then with a deep sigh he said, “I chew on these because on her death bed she told me our love would not die even after she did.” He pulled the stem from his lips and held it just like he held the black queen.

“I chew on rose stems to remind me of Canda and that love doesn’t die. That love is always there on the lips to be said, or shared.”

I tell M—to stop the recorder. I sit and stare at the floor. I stare at the ceiling. I stare at m—trying to come up with words that make the story sound beautiful. To make it a writers story. But I find I can’t speak for awhile and for some reason I have to stop myself from crying.

“He died. He died before we moved. A couple of days after that dinner. That day was his wife’s birthday, by the way. I went to the barber shop and Clive told me Giovanni was shot in his home the night before. ‘Revenge for what he had done in his youth.”

“On my way home, I stopped in the same Safeway and opened a chess set. I stole the black queen out of it and went home; trying not to cry for fear that mom’s roommate would see me and do something horrible.”

“Whenever I had the chance, I would buy or cut a rose out of someone’s garden, dry it out and hold it between my teeth. I was trying to let Giovanni’s ghost know that his love would never die as long as I was around to remember it. Now I don’t feel right unless I have a rose stem close to me, in my pocket or clenched between my teeth. Maybe its how I keep love near me.”

She heard him crying and slowly walked into the room. He had pushed the laptop off the desk, onto the floor and had his head buried in his arms, the sobs coming hard.

She walked behind him, put her hand on his back, “Shhhh.”

“I. I. I. Can't do this.” He said sitting up. “I just can't!” he sobbed wrapping his arms around her waist and crying into her chest.

She embraced him, stroked his hair and whispered, “Shhhh. I am here my river. I am here.”

After several minutes of silence she asked, “Want me to read it?”

He laughed, wiped the tears from his eyes and replied, “Of course, you have to tell me if is any good or not. You know, famous writer and shit!! Gotta make sure it is good.” he laughed again.

She grabbed his chin and raised it up so he could see her face.

“God, you are so beautiful.” he said with more tears falling from his eyes.

“Hey? Listen.”

He smiled.

“This is not about publishing this right now. This is about getting it out. Getting it all out. You hear me.”

He smiled, nodded and stood up.

“The story is yours now.” he said.

Laughing, she picked up the laptop off the floor. “If this still works that is.”

“Willow is on the porch. Go. I will come get you when I am done.”

As he was walking out the door she stopped him.

“Hey. Don't go downstairs and try to write about us. I know you want to. Just sit on the porch and breathe.”

She was smiling, but the stern voice was there. He called it her Powerhouse Thunder Goddess voice. He smiled, “when you say it like that, love, I don't have an option. But have you met me? You know I am going to”

“I know. I love you my river.”

He came back over, put his fingertips to her cheeks, kissed her head, nose, lips and put his head on hers. “I love you, my ocean.”

He left the room and left her with the story.

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acacophonyofsilentvoices · 7 years

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twenty-four; passage

Dear L,

it’s been so long now. so much has happened. i suppose I'm happy. i.. i've been seeing a therapist. i told my mum i thought i was depressed. that was tough. she seemed to close off to me, i'm sure she was devastated. but she was there for me. and that's all I needed. i regretted it sometimes, wished i could just close off again and take back what i'd said. but it's better that i told her. if I hadn't… maybe i'd be dead now. i don't know. all I know is that things are a hell of a lot better than they used to be. i came so very close to dying. it must have been november; i made all the preparations, wrote things to everyone that mattered, got into the clothes i'd need for the cold, had the pills. everything. i waited until it was 2am, so everyone was asleep and i could leave without anyone noticing, and it would be hours till they realised i wasn't there. i planned on taking the pills and then getting as far away from home as i could, so no one could find me. but something stopped me. i'd waited up so long, and i was already exhausted. i told myself i didn't want to have to go out, run the risk of the pills failing and - if i was found - having to go to hospital, to see the people i wanted to leave behind. my plan was hardly foolproof, and i was just too tired, and i was lying on my bed, and suddenly it just seemed easier to sleep instead of to die. i told myself i could do it another time. maybe i was just wussing out and covering it with excuses. it doesn’t matter; i'm just glad i'm alive right now.

without you in my life things are so much easier, so much simpler. since you were expelled and i never saw you anymore, i just stopped thinking of you; it stopped being every few hours, became every few days, and then every few weeks. you don't have that power over me anymore. i'm sure if i saw you it would hurt like hell. but for now things are good. great, even.

and i have someone else. someone who is like me, who actually cares about me and reciprocates what i feel. i feel guilty sometimes, but… i'm trying to tell myself i deserve a bit of happiness. you remember H, right? i think you two used to hang out together quite a bit, with the two W's. i don't know if you know about us. i don't want to care but i guess i do. i want you to see it and hurt, but i think it's more likely you'll just denounce me and think i'm a slut.

i didn't expect anything like this to happen. but by january, the pain had dulled, and i wasn't so hopelessly sad all the time anymore. and then I had a trip to the city with a bunch of people from school, and S, H, M and I ended up just hanging together and we all just clicked, and god i think that was one of the best days of my life. H and I just got along so well, and we talked about Arceus and pokemon mythology and he played stupid all star remixes at the park and it was just… simple. and then we had that sleepover, and went to the game place the next day. sab told me he thought i was cute and i freaked out a little (a lot) and we ended up sitting with sab, and she made up dumb code names for us and asked us if we liked 'sudoku' or 'chess'. it was so stupidly exciting. and then we started talking more and more, going from the group chat to pms, spending every day talking for hours. staying up till 5am together, until we were so tired we were falling asleep while we typed. it was just… easy between us. it felt different to any other sort of crush - they'd all been obsessive, childish. this was something else. i think because i already knew he thought i was cute, i was willing to go for it. i didn't see any downside, and so far there hasn't been one.

it feels nothing like what i felt for you, which makes me think i probably never loved you - loved the idea of you maybe, or else i was just obsessively infatuated. obsession seems a more accurate descriptor, in hindsight. but god, i'm so glad i have him. it shows me how wrong everything with you was, reminds me i should never let that happen again. he asked me out on valentines, left a silly pick up line in my locker and then gave me the rest when he came up to spend lunch with us, asked me if i wanted to go to the movies with him. the second i saw that slip of paper in my locker i felt giddy with happiness. and he hasn’t stopped making me feel that way. he memorised a whole passage from a book to tell me he loved me, just because i once mentioned i loved how the guy confessed his love for the girl. he does so much for me, and everything he does reminds me how little you ever did, even as friends. you never showed me, never told me you cared. but H does that every single day, proves to me over and over how much he cares. you were want i wanted, once. but you weren't what i needed. H is everything. he's good for me, good to me.

i still think about you. i still get sad about you. but i know now that i made a mistake in investing so much in you. i know that i fucked up, and you fucked up, and it ended badly. but that's okay. maybe we just didn't meet at the right time. you gave me happiness, but you also gave me far too much pain. i'm glad we aren't in each other's lives anymore. as much as i once adored you, i know it was unhealthy, and i know it's better this way.

#depression #life #vent #writing #original writing #letter #letters i'll never send

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aprisonlovestory-blog · 7 years

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“The most powerful weapon on Earth, is the Human soul on fire.” - Marshal F. Foch

I sighed heavily.

Something I do frequently these days. The incident from last October still makes me depressed. I'm not surprised though I know it was my fault. I allowed myself to lose control, to let go, to feel and that sort of thing never goes unpunished. Blinking my eyes, they feel heavy urging me to sleep. I know what comes with sleep though, dreams of a past life, a love lost and a time in my life when I was actually happy. When my past transgressions and foul transgressions of others seemed to melt away and be forgotten. I closed my eyes again, I felt nothing but utter loneliness. Something that most can't find in the world of today. Nothing to do but sleep and dream about what I lost, it can't be healthy to dream so much...

As I stepped up to the steep rock ledge, where Jenny and I decided to have our lunch, the ocean breeze swirled around me. The thick humid smell of the slimy, salty, seaweed filled the air. Above the seagulls haunting cries, I heard her come up behind me.

“Hows the view look?” she asked.

“See for yourself,” as I put my arm around her, she slipped a hand around my waist and we looked out, marveling at the spectacular ocean side scenery around us.

“Wow it's beautiful here,” she said in awe.

A soft crash of the waves on the rocks below, ever so often added to the serenity of the spot we'd chosen for our picnic.

We had only been dating a few months, but it was at this moment that I knew I loved her. We were hugging each other, locked in embrace. Her hand rose from my shoulder, our eyes locked, time slowing until a silent understanding flowed between us. Our faces were inches apart, feeling each others breath on our skin. The moment hung there, our breathing falling into a synchronized rhythm. As I looked to the right the forest covered the mountains loomed over us like giants, the massive redwood trees reaching, pawing at the soft blue ocean sky. It was like nothing I had ever experienced before. We kissed. Her lips full and warm, filled with passion. We inhaled each others soul until we were one. A moment of perfection, and as our thoughts and worries drifted away, we understood. Without a single word necessary. I knew.

...I woke up. Gasping for air, disoriented and my skin slick with sweat. I wince as I sit up, my body is racked with pain from my muscles tensing and contracting from the nights dreams. Seeing her in my dreams, hearing that voice that I had been so in love with and feeling her soft skin on mine. Only to wake up here and have her fade away like fog in the morning sun. Sitting up, I looked about my cell. The feeble light from the courtyard outside finally showing me the corners of the inside of my cell. Voices had already begun to be heard downstairs so, rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I got up. I pulled my orange coveralls on and stepped outside my cell. Shutting the metal door behind me, I leaned on the bars enclosing my tier. Looking down, men had already begun to start their days. Making coffee, reading the morning paper and small groups quietly talking among themselves. I started down the stairs towards the day use area.

“Morning”, one inmate said to me as I passed by.

“G'morning”, my response. I never really say much more than that, especially in the morning. I sat on the stainless steel counter at the back of the room facing the common areas television, that was playing some comedy show. I gazed aimlessly around, surveying my surroundings. Other than a few windows on one side looking out into our courtyard, that besides the ceiling is fully encased in concrete. Just white walls, cell doors painted a sickly institutional green, men quietly playing cards or chess. The television with some stand up comic roaming the stage, screaming into a microphone bitching about his wife. He poked fun at the insane demands of his kids. I wanted to punch his face so bad for his blind ungratefulness. He didn't know how lucky he was. To have a wife to love, to have kids and a home of his own. Recognizing the bitterness in my thoughts, I quickly forced them out. I can't afford to feel ever again. If you've never killed someone, you can't really imagine what it's like. You don't want to know. It leaves you with something hard and heavy in the pit of your stomach, something that never dissolves. Most of us, I'm convinced, just aren't wired to take a human life.

When I say most of us, I'm not talking about some deranged serial killer or some stone cold sniper or one of those guys that come back from war and saying killing people was like squishing ants. I'm talking about normal people. Your average Joe can't digest taking the life of another, accident or not. It changes them.

It's April 3, 2016, it's been months since I last wrote. I've been trying not to think about how much I miss her, keeping my head down and doing my time. A lot has gone on since my last correspondence. I guess if I were to summarize it all, it would not do my time justice, so I'll start from where I left off last.

It was the morning of Feb. 5, 2016 and as my lights automatically turned on at 6:50, to initiate our wake up for breakfast at 7:00, I sat up in my bed. I slowly stretched, my shoulders and arms ached from my constant workouts in the gym.

“Click”, the lock for my cell door opens and I shuffle my way down to the common area for breakfast. One pant leg awkwardly pulled up and one eye still glued shut, I probably looked really funny, but I didn't care. I have been on this unit for the last four months and everyone knows and respects me. I was settled in and prepared to do some long time. I'm due in court today, a date of little importance, since it was to be put over for another couple weeks.

The video court tanks are grimy, dirty places, separated by where the offenses took place. Two tanks for Edmonton, a couple for the surrounding areas and a “out of town” tank. Since my matters are in Lymburn and Vancouver, the outta town tank is where I'm usually put. I sat down, around me I noticed a couple guys that I met while I've been here. One of the guys name was Tevin, he always referred to me as a “real nigga”. After about an hour of small talk and random guys coming and going. The door opened and in walked this snitch that we had “checked off” our unit previously. He sat down directly across from me and looked up. Confusion quickly turned to recognition then to fear as he realized who I was. As if to hide his obvious emotions, his face turned to a scowl and glared at me. I turned to my hommie, Tevin, and said under my breath,

“Yo man, that's the snitch we checked off a couple weeks ago”.

“Whatcha going to do bro?”

“Not sure, but if he keeps up that staring act with me, I'ma do something 'real quick'”. In the holding tanks, the guards can't see inside except for a small camera in the top corner of the room. I knew that I needed to do something, so I stood up and walked over to another guy I knew and sat down. I leaned over and whispered,

“Hey man, can you cover the camera? I have some business I have to take care of.”

Understanding right away, he nodded and I walked back over to where I was sitting before and sat down beside Tevin. The snitch was watching me but I didn't care, events were in motion, too late to back down now. I waited for 5 to 10 minutes, just long enough for him to let his guard down. I glanced at the camera guy. He was sitting behind and to the left of the snitch, so he had no idea what was about to happen. I nodded at the camera guy and he stood up holding a roll of toilet paper and used it to cover the camera. As soon as it was covered I had about 30 seconds before guards unlocked the door and rushed in with clubs and mace. I launched my left foot forward catching him in the jaw, snapping his head back. I jumped up, striking him with 5 quick punches to his head and face. As he fell to the ground, I reared back and delivered a powerful kick to his ribs. Above the other inmates cheers, I heard the sharp click of the door being unlocked and quickly sat down. I wasn't quick enough as luck would have it. The first guard through the doors seen me sit down and yanked me out of the tank, as the other guards pulled out the punching bag and the camera guy. They told me I was being charged with assault and threw me in a solitary tank.

A few hours later, while I sat there, a case worker came to see me. Informing me that I would be leaving my unit, 3-D, to be placed in unit 1-D. The walk back to 3-D seemed to take forever. I was pissed, I was so comfortable at my unit, only to be uprooted and brought somewhere else because of my own stupidity. Why do I always do things to screw myself over? Once back at the unit, myself and a couple other inmates pleaded with the senior officer there to make some calls to keep me on the unit. He was an old army vet who had been working at the remand for quite some time and had a bit of pull. After twenty minutes of being on the phone with the director, he slammed the phone down with a bang. Confirming my fears that I was indeed being transferred. So, after saying my goodbyes to the friends I had made there for the past four months (mostly just the cleaners who befriended me, Cliff and Joe.), I was on my way to my new unit, 1-Delta.

It's hard being left behind. It's hard to be the one who stays. I try and keep busy, time goes by faster that way. I go to sleep alone and wake up alone. I work out, play basketball in the yard, everything seems so simple until you start thinking about it. Why is love intensified by absence? Sometimes I compare jail to war, where men leave and women wait for them to return. I wonder if she waits for me? Each moment that I wait feels like a year, an eternity. Each moment is as slow and transparent as glass, through each moment I can see infinite moments lined up waiting.

One-Delta was like Three-Delta only in aspect that they had both high turnover rates, guys always coming and going. Everything else was different. The guys were bigger and louder, drugs were clearly running rampant there as well. I instantly felt a pang of intimidation. I made my way to my house and laid out my bed. Walking back downstairs, most of the eyes on the unit watching the new fish that just arrived. I sat at a lone table, not sure what to do. The senior guard, at the previous unit, told me that I should sign up for “bootcamp”. He'd seen how much I worked out and said I'd like it better there. So sitting there with nothing to do I started filling out a request form.

“Hey, what's up?”

I looked up to see two guys who had sat down at my table. The one who said hi had a strong East Coast or Newfie accent. The other was a stocky Native guy.

“Uh, not much” was my reply. The Newfie was the first to introduce himself.

“I'm Jimmy!” thrusting his hand out. Shaking his hand, I turned to the other guy.

I said, “I'm Chance”

“Bruno” was his response. I realized he must not be a big talker.

Over the next few weeks I got to know those guys really well. We played cards, chess and basketball. We drank brew together and told stories on how we ended up there. All was going well when, one day, I was reading on my bed and the guards buzzed me to come to the staff station. My first reaction was, “Oh shit, what did I do”. Once at the staff station, though, I was told I was accepted into bootcamp and to pack my stuff. I was being uprooted again.

The bootcamp is on a tier based progression system. Everyone, who first joins, starts on the bottom tier. Slowly, with hard work and a good attitude, guys can eventually make it to the top tier. I've been on the bootcamp for roughly five months now and have been on the top tier for two months. Some perks about being on the top tier are we serve meals every four days instead of being locked up during meal times. The shifts rotate between the top and middle tier. On 1-A bootcamp the top tier are able to go on bio-clean-ups through out the jail. Each clean-up pays ten dollars and range from a variety of nastiness. Most are caused from inmates fighting. Other than that I've been o.k. I guess, I'm trying to get in the habit of writing more frequently again. It's so boring here, you would think it would be easy but it's hard to find motivation when all you want to do is sleep.

Pretty women are everywhere. Women who are able to turn the heads of men who already have a gorgeous super model on their arm. There were women who could get off with a warning, when police pulled them over simply by batting their eyelashes. And then there was Jenny. I was struck by her beauty the first time I seen her. I'm sure most people consider her attractive, although she did have her flaws. A nose that upturned, ever so slightly. A small gap between her front teeth and hair that, more often than not, did whatever it pleased but, to me, it was those small imperfections that I could think of no one more beautiful than her.

No matter what I'm ever doing, I can always feel the weight of what happened that night. Leading up to it, my life had been perfect. Sure, it had some flaws but I had a good job, great girlfriend and a fresh start in a new city. I lost it all that night. The night I can never forget. Most of the time, I'm able to keep the memory of it all away, but every now and then at odd times, it comes to me with such a force. The images never change or fade. The images never blurred around the edges, as though I was viewing it through someone else' eyes.

It's been months since I last wrote, call it lack of inspiration if you will. Today is Sunday, July 31st, and with tomorrow being the start of August a lot is coming up but also a lot has gone on. My court date for my B.C. Matter is coming up soon. A month after that will be my court date for my Lymburn charges. I'll finally know what's going on and how much time the crown is asking. I'm still on bootcamp and liking it. We wake up at 7AM, eat breakfast and clean our cells. By 8:30AM, P.T. or physical training starts and usually last for about two hours. We also train regularly in military drill routines. We have two drill teams, one is a farm team for guys wanting to be on the actual drill team. With lots of practice guys are selected individually to join the drill team when a spot opens up. I've been on the drill team for four months now and once in a while will also train the farm team.

Today is August 10, 2016 and it's prisoner justice day. It's a holiday I have never heard of before coming here. Today prisoners all over Canada peacefully protest by not eating and not doing any work for the jails. By performing hunger and work strikes we acknowledge all of the prisoners that have died to get us the rights and privileges we have today. It's definitely for a good cause but a hard sacrifice to make especially since we are fed so little here. Our meal trays are approximately 8x10 inches and about 2 inches high and always halfway filled. I knew I wouldn't be eating today so I slept for most of the morning. I awoke around noon my stomach knotting in a sharp sudden hunger, dulled for long hours by sleep. I made myself a coffee, the warm liquid soothing the rumbling pangs that I was feeling. I let out an exhausted sigh, only 12 more hours until I can eat something. 12 more hours... I try not to think about the time but it's all around me. Phrases like, kill time. Pass time. Waste Time. ...lose time. In good time. About time. Take your time. Save time. Right on time. Out of time. Mind the time. Be on time. Spare time. Keep time. Stall for time... a long time.

At first there was blackness and solitude. I never wanted to forget her. I promised her I wouldn't. I wanted desperately to hold o to every memory of her.

I'd squeeze my eyes shut until, finally, at some point in the beginning of my time here, I shook off the darkness of my depression, pulled out a pen and paper and began this story about my time. I try to imagine life without time. I can't. There is a clock on the wall, a schedule and a calendar. I know the month, the year, the day of the week. Yet all around me, outside, the time is ignored. Birds are not late. A dog does not check his watch. Deer do not lose sleep over passing birthdays. We alone, as people, measure time and, because of this, we alone suffer a paralyzing fear that no other creature endures. A fear of time running out. There is something I have learned while passing my time here. There is a reason why God limits our days. It is to remind us that each one is precious.

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