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#bless anyone who makes it thru my self indulgent screaming gfgDFGD
bcneheaded · 1 year
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So!! bathing/hygiene headcanons!! 🚿 this is a "me rambling endlessly" post, just as a warning !
I was in the shower earlier yes? as one does. and I was just thinking.... about like.... Artemis, yeah. But I was thinking about how, he probably doesn't have to shower or anything necessarily? Because he's not a living creature, and so, doesn't have to worry about like... everyday buildup of human-y dirtiness (idk how to phrase that but u kno).
But at the same time, especially if he's been really busy with shop cleaning/work, has had to fight/kill something/someone, or has been out and about on his 'business trips' or something etcetcetc-- like... he's gotta get dirty sometimes.. right? even with how careful he is not to, I dont think it would matter. He'd have to clean up sometime, somehow. And I suppose... like.... if he did, it would be infrequently, "bathing", whatever that entails for him (he again like... its just another one of those things he doesn't have to worry about doing often, as its not as if ?? he's gonna get stinky like a human would).
But anyway I was just thinking about bathing / cleaning headcanon for him ?? and I came up with like... two alternatives. 1... was that he could just sponge down, genuinely just take a bathtub full of water, remove necessary clothes, clean dirty area(s) and be done with it, never needing to fully submerge unless absolutely necessary or if its just easier, depending on the level of filth he somehow found himself in for some reason. 2... second one was a little different? but involves his tar and personal abilities directly! He has the ability to manipulate his tar, yes? as well as the ability to heat it up to incredible temperatures (demonic skills yea?). So if he really wanted, he could just.... burn it.. all off ?? if thats any easier. Though, because he's more inclined to be careful not to damage his bones (and although he can remove them, he would never remove the skull. so fact remains, he'd risk fracturing the bone with the heat I suppose, unless magically protected somehow ...Which is.... possible. and likely, for everyday reasons).
But say he did that for the bones, yes? Say maybe, he goes to the basement(dungeon.... its a dungeon) and goes into one of those sealed rooms no one is allowed access to-- he could have this charm that protects the bones from the heat, and because he's somewhere that yknow.... wont burn down (stone and all yeah?) he can just let er rip ?? remove clothes to be cleaned and incinerate any trace of dirt via molten tar >:] ! which is cooler an idea than the sponging off one and also entirely plausible (given it.... would potentially be more thorough and faster).
The sponge bath could have scents added to it just as an additional nice little thing... which is likely. I feel like he'd get badru or the whispers' opinion on scent choice fjdjffgdf if any fragrance at all, it'd be very.... very faint. maybe a little dab of cologne?? but unlikely.
As for turning his tar completely molten in the safety of the dungeon-- jfdjjds i can't imagine he'd smell... particularly good after that.. (but also maybe not too BAD once he cools down?), but he probably would smell some kinda way, even if just very faintly. he'd also?? probably be just a little warmer than he usually is, potentially noticeably so, for just a little while after. and the floor?? surrounding areas of where he did it would probably be nice and toasty
gjfgjfd catch someone asking Artemis if he has heated flooring tho after he does and he just ''.....no.''
+ also ?? a thought but like..... man could walk around without clothes and would not be embarrassed about it bc of ''nakedness'' necessarily. he'd be a little embarrassed to have been seen without clothes I think, if only because its like.... "indecent". yknow. his whole Old Victorian Gentleman vibe just OUT the WINDOW... he /has/ nothing to hide so it wouldn't MATTER if anyone saw him mid-change or post bath or something but he'd be BIG :(( about it LOL
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