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badlydrawnstuff · 5 years

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Fate Goes (and has a bad evening)

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*OKAY ITS BEEN LIKE SEVERAL MONTHS SINCE THIS DRAFT HAS BEEN OPENED SO WE'RE JUST GONNA.. MOVE ON* Sheepy: Bedi: *he's preparing the outside of the house for Halloween. it's important to be festive!* Sheepy: Bedi: I didn't think we should present our home as scary, so I went with this cute ornament I found in the store instead. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Cute, yeah. If you cover up the entire face, I could agree it's cute! Sheepy: Bedi: What do you mean? Sheepy: Bedi: I thought its face was cute... Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, do you have a costume yet? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Of course not! Sheepy: Bedi: I don't either. I forgot about it. Sheepy: Bedi: Do you have any ideas? Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... Oh, I've got one! Sheepy: Bedi: What is it? Arsé-kun: Merlin: You be me, I'll be you! Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, good idea! Arsé-kun: Merlin: It can't be that hard, can it?? Sheepy: Bedi: It shouldn't be too difficult. Sheepy: Bedi: It doesn't have to be perfect, after all! Arsé-kun: Merlin: And that just makes it easier on us! Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, and we could make it easier by swapping clothing. Arsé-kun: Merlin: That's what I was thinking! Sheepy: Bedi: Perfect. Arsé-kun: Merlin: And we can wait until the last minute to prepare. So lets get back to this. *he picks up and plants a scarecrow with decent force.* Sheepy: Bedi: *he turns his attention to the last thing he put up and begins straightening it* Sheepy: *Lobo is watching them from the window* Sheepy: Bedi:... *he looks up at the window* Oh, that reminds me. We'll need to get Lobo not to tear it up. Sheepy: Bedi: And we'll need to get Rider not to decapitate anything...huh. They're already kind of Halloween themed. Dr. Griffin, too. Arsé-kun: Merlin: They really are, huh? Lucky them. Sheepy: Bedi: But during Christmas...or Easter... Arsé-kun: Merlin: That's when it sucks to be them! Sheepy: Bedi: Or during Updog day. Lucan told me about it, but not details. Sheepy: Bedi: However, I'm sure it's incredibly important. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... ... What's updog? Sheepy: Bedi: I don't know, unfortunately. Sheepy: Bedi: So you haven't heard of it, either? Arsé-kun: Merlin: *he sighs and stops adjusting a fake tombstone* It's bait to get someone to ask what Updog is! Sheepy: Bedi:...But why? Arsé-kun: Merlin: "What's up, dog", followed by "Not much dog, what's up with you!" Sheepy: Bedi: *he looks completely lost, but his smile is still present* Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, so you're meant to say it to a dog? Arsé-kun: Merlin: "Dog" can be slang for "dude" or "bro". *his airquotes are spot on* Sheepy: Bedi: I see. Arsé-kun: Merlin: It's.. It's a kid friendly variation on sugma. Sheepy: Bedi: Ah... Sheepy: Bedi:.... Sheepy: Bedi: Like the fire slug in the game Kintoki was playing. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ...? Arsé-kun: Merlin: I guess?? Sheepy: Bedi: That's its name. Arsé-kun: Merlin: We'll just have to ask, huh? Sheepy: Bedi: Ask whom? Kintoki? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yeah. Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, I suppose. Arsé-kun: Angra: *he strolls outside, his goal being to ruin the nice pile of leaves* Just google it, you old tart! Sheepy: Bedi:....? Sheepy: Bedi: *he tilts his head* "Google"... Arsé-kun: Merlin: *he promptly pulls his phone out to google it* Oh, it's Slugma. Was close, though. Sheepy: Bedi: I'm afraid I can't "google" anything. I'm not aware of such a verb. Sheepy: Bedi: I apologize. Arsé-kun: Angra: *he stops and squints so hard his eyes are slivers* You not use the internet or something? You an old retired man? Sheepy: Bedi: Once again, I'm not familiar with such things. Arsé-kun: Angra: Your fuckbuddy does streams and you don't know shit? Sheepy: Bedi: Ah! That's magic! *he's beaming* Isn't he amazing!? Arsé-kun: Angra: Sweet merciful zoroastrian feast of fucks. *he puts his hands on his face. his face is gone. incredible void boy tricks* It's all wires and signals. Edison n' Tesla would shit themselves over it. Sheepy: Bedi: I'm afraid...I do not follow your explanation. Arsé-kun: Angra: Wizrad, I am stealing your idiot! I'm teaching him how to use the internet! Arsé-kun: Merlin: Have fun! Sheepy: Bedi: I don't understand. Arsé-kun: Angra: You're about to! *he grabs onto the Airgetlam and very, very quickly regrets his decisions. But he sticks to it!* Sheepy: *Airgetlam glows upon being touched.* Sheepy: Bedi: I...I see. *he doesn't appear to notice it at all.* Arsé-kun: Angra: C'mon, we're goin' in! Gonna show you how to look up shit and cool swords, or whatever you knights like! Arsé-kun: *Angra goes to drag Bedi inside. Airgetlam is in no danger of being torn off on accident- Angra's not strong enough to do that, even if he wanted to.* Sheepy: *bedi follows, confused still* Sheepy: Bedi: Why? Arsé-kun: *Angra grabs a nearby laptop and opens it up. It ain't his.* Arsé-kun: Angra: Because the world runs on this shit, kid. Sheepy: Bedi:....! Sheepy: Bedi: Internet is sunlight. Arsé-kun: Angra: It's closer to lightning, I think! Arsé-kun: Angra: Chaldea? Internet. Phones? Some net. Streams? Net. Electricity is wild. Sheepy: Bedi: Net? Sheepy: Bedi: Like fishing net. Arsé-kun: Angra: Internet. I ain't sayin' it every single time. Sheepy: Bedi: So Chaldea is internet. Arsé-kun: Angra: It sure has a lot of it! Okay, here. *he pulls up the equivalent of google that's used these days.* What do ya wanna look up? Anythin'. Sheepy: Bedi: *he looks up* Arsé-kun: Angra: ... ... On the internet, you literal turd. Sheepy: Bedi: Like in tomes. Arsé-kun: Angra: Yes! Sheepy: Bedi: I don't know. Sheepy: Bedi: Perhaps on wolves to figure out how to prevent them from tearing up your decorations... Arsé-kun: Angra: *he looks up "Stopping dogs from ruining decorations", and in a second tab looks up "How to google on the internet", before passing the laptop off to Bedi* Go fucking nuts, go feral, go play. Sheepy: Bedi: What? Arsé-kun: Angra: Oh, man. *he very slowly opens the first link for the first search, so Bedi can watch* Like that. Arsé-kun: Angra: You can read, yeah? You're not dumb? Sheepy: Bedi: I can read. Arsé-kun: Angra: Then get readin'! Searching stuff is just a book on a screen. Sheepy: Bedi:...I, um.. Sheepy: Bedi: I still don't understand why. Arsé-kun: Angra: Because the net's got everythin'! It's got all the books! All of 'em! Shit's wild. Arsé-kun: Angra: And everybody these days relies on it more than their legs half the time! Not literally! Sheepy: Bedi: Really? So it's a library? Arsé-kun: Angra: A big wired library! Sheepy: Bedi: I see! Sheepy: Bedi: I'd like to visit this library one day!! Arsé-kun: *Angra leans over to bring up a third search. "What is the internet and how do I use it?" It has video results! Bedi (probably) knows what videos are! I hope??* Arsé-kun: *Bedi will now be inconvenienced by The World's Evil, for at least an hour. Or that's what Angra's gonna say about it. He's just as interested in how it actually works.* Sheepy: *Bedi seems to be getting more and more anxious as time passes.* Arsé-kun: *Sucks to be you, Angra thinks!* Sheepy: Bedi: Well, it's just... Arsé-kun: Angra: A gigantic waste of time? Sheepy: Bedi: I left in the middle of helping Merlin. Sheepy: Bedi: Y...no. Arsé-kun: Angra: Yes? Great! I've taught a thing and ruined your afternoon! *yesssss!* Sheepy: Bedi: I do appreciate what you've told me... Sheepy: Tristan: How sad, how sad. Arsé-kun: Angra: What's depressin' you this week, sad man? Sheepy: Tristan: The day of Halloween is on the horizon, and yet, I have not even begun to set sail. Sheepy: Tristan: *he strums his harp* It occurred to me that it wouldn't matter, because even if I were to dress up as something else, it would never change how despicable a man I am. Sheepy: Tristan: How sad, how sad. Arsé-kun: Angra: Aww, cute! If the sum of evil can do it, what's stoppin' you, pumpkin? *he is absolutely teasing Tristan. At least he's not being snappy about it* Sheepy: Tristan: Ah, to be a Knight of the Round Table, filled wih confidence of tomorrow. Ah, to be the evil of the world, fearless, uncaring of how others may judge him. Arsé-kun: Angra: Here's this villain's advice! Just put on cat ears and you're done. Sheepy: Tristan: And yet, I quiver before this decision of mine, incapable of escaping from the standstill I have put myself in. Arsé-kun: Angra: ... *he googles "Lazy halloween costumes"* Sheepy: Tristan: I wouldn't be a very beautiful cat in my current state. Sheepy: Tristan: Ah, I can only be a thing of beauty, for I am a thing of beauty. Sheepy: Tristan: So a cat would be out of the picture, since I'm lacking in four legs and a tail. Sheepy: Tristan: Those, and their ears, are what make them beautiful. So, you see, I could never capture that. Sheepy: Tristan: How sad, how sad. Sheepy: Tristan: Sometimes I'm so beautiful it troubles even myself. Arsé-kun: Angra: *he's run out of responses. completely out.* Sheepy: Bedi: I... Sheepy: Bedi: Y...yes. Sheepy: Tristan: Do you ever feel this way? Arsé-kun: Angra: What, sad? Sure. Sheepy: Tristan: No, no. Sheepy: Tristan: Troubled by your own beauty. Sheepy: Tristan: Ah, I feel a need to always live up to it. Arsé-kun: Angra: As you can see, I'm a black hole! Can't relate! I'm not pretty! Sheepy: Tristan: Perhaps you are but you haven't discovered it yet. Arsé-kun: Angra: I'd say "Hell yeah internal beauty" but man I am one, UGLY, motherfucker. Sheepy: Tristan: Internal beauty is something you're capable of fixing. Sheepy: Tristan: It just requires bravery I do not have. Sheepy: Bedi: I'd recommend a varied and healthy diet. Arsé-kun: Angra: Have you tried eating scorpion yet? Sheepy: Bedi: Oh! I have. Arsé-kun: Angra: Good shit. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes. Sheepy: Bedi: I wouldn't word it that way myself, but... Sheepy: Bedi: I agree with the feelings behind that. Arsé-kun: Angra: Don't eat shit, either, kids, you WILL die. Sheepy: Bedi: I didn't brave such things... Sheepy: Tristan: Hmm? Sheepy: Tristan: But you eat honey. Arsé-kun: Angra: You tellin' me that's bee shit? Sheepy: Bedi:...I don't think honey is bee poop. Arsé-kun: Angra: *New search! What is Honey, actually?* ... ... Honey is bee vomit. I hate this information! You can have it! Sheepy: Bedi:.. Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, that doesn't surprise me. Arsé-kun: Angra: That's not the reply I was looking for! I love it. Sheepy: Bedi: I suspected bees had a deep, dark secret. Sheepy: Bedi: It's a lot less dark than I expected. Arsé-kun: Angra: Like how the Queen can't fly and get her fat little body off the ground because she's terminally fucking bees? Sheepy: Bedi: Or how all female bees are capable of producing eggs, but the queen will eat their eggs. Arsé-kun: Angra: Nice. Sheepy: Bedi: If the queen doesn't respond in time, the female bees will kill her and lay more eggs, but... Arsé-kun: Merlin: ._. Sheepy: Bedi: They don't hatch into anything from what I recall, so the hive ends up...ah, Merlin. I apologize. ...I got distracted and didn't help you. Arsé-kun: Merlin: It's cool, Bedi, got Lance to take over. Sheepy: Bedi: I'm happy to hear that. Sheepy: Tristan: Merlin. Arsé-kun: Merlin: What's up, Tristan? Sheepy: Tristan: I've come across a standstill. How sad. Sheepy: Tristan: I'm too beautiful for any costumes, so I fear diminishing my appearance with them. Sheepy: Tristan:...But I want to join in on the festivities. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Be yourself but hotter. Sheepy: Tristan:....! Sheepy: Tristan: Ah, I knew I could count on you. Sheepy: Tristan: I'll be myself, but with an open jacket. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Wait, I've got more. Dress up as a different class, but you're still fantastic you. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yes, you understand! Sheepy: Tristan: Hmm? Sheepy: Tristan: Another class.. Sheepy: Tristan:...Yes, I'll be... Sheepy: Tristan: *he poses* Studmuffin class. Arsé-kun: Merlin: New exclusive class! One member only! Sheepy: Bedi:...I don't remember hearing about that class before. Arsé-kun: *angra makes a sound akin to a verbal keysmash* Arsé-kun: Merlin: It exists now because we've said so. Sheepy: Tristan: You can join too, Merlin. I'm sure you qualify for it. Ah, Sir Bedivere, too. Sheepy: Tristan: We'll be the Three Studkateers. Arsé-kun: *mozart breaks into uncontrollable laughter several rooms away. i wonder why* Sheepy: Bedi: I feel like I've been dragged into something that I'll quickly come to regret. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Love to join you, but I'm being Bedi this year. Sheepy: Tristan: The Three Studkateers disband before they even can make group jackets... Sheepy: Tristan: How sad, how sad! Sheepy: Tristan: Ah, I truly am alone on this mission! Arsé-kun: Angra: I'll volunteer with my inner beauty to keep you company! Sheepy: Tristan: We'll be Beauty and the Beast. Sheepy: Tristan: Of course, I take the first role. Arsé-kun: Angra: Better than what I had planned! I'll take Beast! Sheepy: Bedi: I...I'm glad it all worked out in the end. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yeah, me too. Sheepy: Bedi: But how did things go with Lobo? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Haven't seen him yet, but I get the feeling he's up to something. Sheepy: Bedi: Oh dear... Sheepy: Bedi: *he raises his voice* Lobo! Sheepy: *Lobo walks in with a pumpkin in his mouth* Arsé-kun: Angra: You got it! You've got a pumpkin! Sheepy: Lobo: *He's wagging his tail* Sheepy: Bedi: Lobo, don't eat the ornaments, okay? Sheepy: Lobo: *he glares viciously at Bedi* Arsé-kun: Merlin: I don't think that needs a translation! Sheepy: Bedi: I'll give you any other food you want if you don't eat the ornaments. Sheepy: Lobo:......! Sheepy: Lobo: *he snorts* (Chocolate.) Arsé-kun: Angra: Why, so you eat grass all day tomorrow? Sheepy: Lobo:? Arsé-kun: Angra: Eh, okay! *he hops up to get Lobo some sweets. there is a 50% chance Minako will destroy him during the journey.* Sheepy: Bedi: Where are you going? Arsé-kun: Angra: Gettin' Lobo what he wants. I like keeping my limbs intact! Sheepy: Lobo: *he follows Angra, the pumpkin still in his mouth* Sheepy: Bedi: I...see. Sheepy: Bedi: Is he really that mad...? He seems happy with the pumpkin. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I'm surprised he isn't risking it to tease Lobo. Sheepy: Bedi: Me too. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Even the world's evil is capable of improving.. Arsé-kun: Merlin: That's something to think about. Arsé-kun: *Other current events include! Mephisto, Jekyll, and Jack turning Mink's living room into an impromptu lab (mostly by Mephisto's Terr. Creation), uhhhh, Lance slowly setting up the outside (He's very unsure, and has invited Herc to help), Proto going on some sort of spy mission, and uhhhhhh whatever else we can think of.* Sheepy: Tristan: How sad, how sad! Sheepy: Tristan: Even the world's evil is capable of improvement, and yet I... Sheepy: *Rider is watching Lancelot and Herc, Holmes has joined in on the science club* Sheepy: Tristan: Ah...if only I were capable of it. But instead...my inability to improve... Sheepy: Tristan: Stems from the coldest depths of my soul. Sheepy: Tristan: How sad, how sad! Sheepy: Bedi: I know how to improve at anything, Sir Tristan. If you recognize your flaws and address them, you'll improve. Sheepy: Tristan: Ah...My friend is such a genius! Truly, I'm lucky to have such fri....-!!! Sheepy: Tristan: Th...that's it! Sheepy: Tristan: What a lucky man I am! How joyful! Arsé-kun: Merlin: You do have friends. You seem to doubt that often. Sheepy: Tristan: Ah...but my realization... Sheepy: Tristan: Friends can help me improve as a person. Arsé-kun: Merlin: They absolutely can! Arsé-kun: Jekyll, distantly: Please don't imbibe the chemicals!!! Sheepy: Izou: I'm dumb and don't know what those words mean! Sheepy: Izou: It ticks me off! Sheepy: Izou: It makes me want to drink this weird lookin' alcohol even more! Arsé-kun: Jekyll: Please do not drink the chemicals. It is not alcohol. You won't get drunk. Sheepy: Izou: Then what's the point!? Sheepy: Izou: You smart people are all bland! Arsé-kun: Jekyll: ... *he holds his phone up to his ear for a moment or so* .. I've been corrected. I'm told to inform you that drinking this will make you dead and stupid. In that order. Sheepy: Izou: I'm already both! Sheepy: Izou: Err....wait! Sheepy: Izou: I'm not that - Sheepy: Izou: ...... Sheepy: Izou: Is it...........first...or second...--I don't care! I ain't dead, you smart person! Arsé-kun: Mephisto: You will be once I bomb you to smithereens! *:D* Or the invisible guy can get you, whichever comes first! *he gestures to Jack holding up a visible t-shirt. floating t-shirt. scary.* Sheepy: Izou: stop making up big words! I don't understand them! Are you doing it to make fun of me!? Arsé-kun: Mephisto: You, bomb, explode, die! *this is amusing him far more than it should* Sheepy: Izou: *he huffs* I won't let you if you try! *he puts down the chemical* Sheepy: Izou: Why are you smiling like that!? Are you laughing at me!? Ahhh, you make me so mad! I hate that face of yours! Arsé-kun: Mephisto: Thanks! Sheepy: Izou: ? Sheepy: Izou: Thanks? Sheepy: Izou: What did I do? Nothing for you! Why are you thanking me!? Arsé-kun: Mephisto: Because! *he puts his own chemicals down and caps them. safety first* You're not supposed to like this demon! You can try to punch me after we wrap this up, okay? Arsé-kun rolled a die with 20 sides. The die showed: 2 Arsé-kun: *The t-shirt is put down. Someone's approaching you, Izou, but you don't see shiiiit. Sure hear it though.* Sheepy: Izou: .......Who's there!? Arsé-kun: Jack: The Invisible Man. You look like you were hit by a damn dump truck and smell like it too. Was that your intention? Sheepy: Izou: Oi! I don't look like- whatever you just said! Sheepy: Izou: I'm not lookin' to impress anyone! One minute I was eatin' out of that little kid's trash, and then the next I ended up in here! Arsé-kun: Mephisto: That explains a lot! Sheepy: Izou: I was gonna try to abduct him for ransom money, but I didn't understand what that meant for what I had to do, so I left it up to the kid. Arsé-kun: Jack: Had you harmed him, you'd have ceased to live. *he goes to pat Izou, and leaves a very clear handprint. Jack's hand is now stained with filth. dis gus tang* Sheepy: Izou: 's that a threat? Is abductin' him harm? Sheepy: Izou: I've only seen it on TV. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: This was a better outcome. *he watches as Jack tries to wipe off the filth and just spreads it across himself. Well, now theres some floating dirt smears* Sheepy: Izou: What? Sheepy: Izou: Oi, th' best outcome would've been getting gambling money. Sheepy: Izou: I'm dumb and never won, not even once! Sheepy: Izou: But it's so much fun! Arsé-kun: Jekyll: There are people to gamble with here. You might even win once or twice. Sheepy: Izou: Oh, I want to gamble! And get drunk! Arsé-kun: Jekyll: I can confirm the presence of booze. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: ... Hyde adds that it is "the good shit". Sheepy: Izou: ! Sheepy: Izou: Gimme, gimme! Arsé-kun: Mephisto: Lab adjourned! We'll resume after the holiday! *he picks up Jack's t-shirt and the lab just vanishes. Normal living room resumes it's existence.* Go raid a kitchen, but don't say we sent you~ Sheepy: Izou: Great! Sheepy: Lobo: *he’s sniffing at Jack* Arsé-kun: Jack: *he pats Lobo's nose with his less dirty hand* Do I smell like Shinjuku yet, Lobo? Sheepy: Lobo: *he tilts his head before licking Jack* Sheepy: Izou: !! It’s big! ‘nd fluffy! Arsé-kun: Jekyll: This is Lobo. He might decide you're a toy, so be careful. Arsé-kun: Hyde: Or dinner! Arsé-kun: *Jekyll quickly pats his hair back down. Down, Hyde. Bad. Bad alter-ego.* Sheepy: Lobo: *he looks over at Jekyll before sniffing at Izou* Sheepy: Izou: I'm no toy, nor am I dinner! Sheepy: Lobo: *he bites down on a loose piece of Izou's clothing and starts chewing on it, but Izou is too busy looking smug at Jekyll to notice.* Sheepy: Izou: Fuhahahaha! I'm a scary manslayer! I won't let anyone laugh at me, or I'll cut them down! Especially smart people! Sheepy: Izou: And so that means I'm no one's toy nor dinner! Sheepy: Lobo: *chew, chew* Arsé-kun: Jack: Your scarf sure is. I'm going to clean this grime off. Excuse me, shitheads. *the walking dirt exits scene* Sheepy: Izou:...! Sheepy: Izou: Heyhey, that's not food. I've already tried eating it. Arsé-kun: Angra: Whatt're we doin', pup? *he goes to write "KICK ME" on Izou's scarf* Sheepy: Lobo: *he tilts his head* Arsé-kun: Angra: Daaaaaamn, you're so dirty it's staining pure evil! *his hand is also now stained with gray grime. it doesn't look black on him* Impressive! Sheepy: Izou: Eh? Arsé-kun: Angra: Hi, I'm the villain of the house! Can I inconvenience you? Great! Sheepy: Izou: What? Arsé-kun: Angra: I'm stealing you! I'd hold you for ransom but I'd get a dirty sock and ten qp~ Sheepy: Izou: Where are we goin' Sheepy: Lobo: *he has his mouth open, ready to chew on Izou more* Arsé-kun: Angra: We're goin' up! If we look half decent, we can steal as much as we want from the kitch' and no one can stop us! Sheepy: Izou:...! Sheepy: Izou: Where're we goin'!? Arsé-kun: Angra: Up a floor! Not far! Sheepy: Lobo: *chew chew chew* Arsé-kun: *Mephisto has opted out of this encounter. Goodbye Moose* Sheepy: Izou: Right, I'll follow you. Arsé-kun: *Vlad is currently at the kitchen table, keeping Satoru company. He watches as Angra and Izou pass by, dragging Lobo along behind them. Bc he's still chewing on the scarf. Vlad is unfazed by all this. The only thing he IS fazed by is the smell. Yuck.* Sheepy: Satoru: That's him. Sheepy: Satoru: He seems nice enough. Arsé-kun: Vlad: I see... Did you need yet another dog? Sheepy: Satoru: Dog? Where? Arsé-kun: Vlad: Something about his appearance reminds me of a scruffy street terrier. Sheepy: Satoru: Oh. He reminds me of a rat. Arsé-kun: Vlad: I see that as well, but I quite like rats. Sheepy: Satoru: He asked me to help him kidnap me for ransom money but I said I had to ask you first. Arsé-kun: Vlad: He would have instead gotten my fist as payment, and his blood on the floor as interest. Sheepy: Satoru: That's a weird form of payment. Sheepy: Satoru: What can be bought with it? Arsé-kun: Vlad: Dying by my hand for such crimes. Sheepy: Satoru: Oh. Sheepy: Satoru: Huh. Sheepy: Satoru:.....But, since he lives here now...who...summoned him? Arsé-kun: Vlad: You will have to ask. I may just impale him on the spot. Sheepy: Satoru: Huh? But... Sheepy: Satoru: He's my Servant now. Arsé-kun: Vlad: So he is. Sheepy: Satoru: So killing him, um... Arsé-kun: Vlad: Would be a bad idea. Yes, I understand. Sheepy: Satoru: That's good. Sheepy: Satoru: For now he can just be the weird man who came for dinner and stayed all winter. Sheepy: Satoru: He's unexpected so I won't expect anyone to immediately warm up to him. Arsé-kun: Vlad: Yet, it does sound like some already have. Sheepy: Satoru: That's good. Sheepy: Satoru: Or else...well. Arsé-kun: Mozart: Or well what? What is it, Lassie? Did little Timmy shit in the well? *he continues to think he's funny. Saku stops and stares at him.* Sheepy: Satoru: Mom won't let him sit down. Sheepy: Satoru: Guin probably would chase him down, too. Sheepy: Satoru: And he'd probably smell stinky while everyone tries to eat. Like garbage. Arsé-kun: Vlad: Yes, exactly. Sheepy: Satoru: And I doubt anyone would like that. Arsé-kun: Saku: We would not. Sheepy: Satoru: ...I didn't really think that far before inviting him in. Arsé-kun: Vlad: You didn't. At least you can understand your mistakes. Sheepy: Satoru: If he is a threat in some way, what do w do? Arsé-kun: Vlad: I call first chance at impaling him through the chest with several lances and d- *he has an oven mitt thrown at him. it lands on him and he only stops to glance at Sakura* Yes, yes, I am stopping. Sheepy: Satoru: He already has been stabbed. Arsé-kun: Vlad: There was more, but I seem to not be permitted to continue. Sheepy: Satoru: Oh, okay. Arsé-kun: Mozart: I do hear the shower running upstairs. Maybe someone convinced him to clean up? Sheepy: Satoru: That's good. Arsé-kun: *a bit later on!* Sheepy: Izou: *He's come downstairs and....... did he always have purple hair like that, or...* Arsé-kun: Minako: Oh, you're right. He is fluffy! Sheepy: Satoru: He looks much better now. Arsé-kun rolled a die with 20 sides. The die showed: 7 Arsé-kun: Minako: ... Assassin class, I think? He's hard to pin down. Sheepy: Izou: What? Sheepy: Izou: No. Sheepy: Izou: My class is "Hitokiri". Arsé-kun: Minako: ...? Sheepy: Izou: It's different. Arsé-kun: *Mori is quietly observing from the side, meanwhile* Sheepy: Izou: Why's everyone lookin' at me? Arsé-kun: Mori: You're far stronger than initially calculated. Sheepy: Izou: Hah! Yeah! Sheepy: Izou: I'm a sword prodigy! Fuhahahahaha! Arsé-kun: Mori: Your strength is very impressive. May I ask how you got strong as a servant? Sheepy: Izou: By being a prodigy! Sheepy: Izou: Also, I found this place! Sheepy: Izou: It had these hands. They dropped this tasty food. Sheepy: Izou: Eventually I got thrown out. Sheepy: Izou: I felt weirdly stronger after that. Sheepy: Izou: Oh, yeah. Sheepy: Izou: This weird guy, too. Sheepy: Izou: He looked rich. Sheepy: Izou: His trash tasted like rich people's trash, too. Arsé-kun: Mori: ... ... Can you describe his appearance at all? Sheepy: Izou: Like...a smart guy. Kinda stiff. Uh.... Sheepy: Izou: Very dark hair. Sheepy: Izou: He kinda reminds me of a butler. Arsé-kun: Mozart: Oh, did he speak like.. *ahem* Very properly, yes, but was still able to convey being a pile of- excuse my French- Shit? Sheepy: Izou: Yeah. Sheepy: Izou: I hated how he used big words! It confused me. Arsé-kun: Mori: .... I do hope one of us has reached the same conclusion I have. Sheepy: Holmes: Ah, so his actual Master is... Sheepy: Holmes: Masanori, huh. Arsé-kun: Angra: Butler McBitch! We did it, we solved the mystery. Sheepy: Izou: What? Arsé-kun: Angra: Don't worry about it! If we see him again, we've got free reign to slay the man! Sheepy: Izou: Do I really? Arsé-kun: Angra: *he looks to Satoru* Do we? Sheepy: Satoru: Um, that doesn't sound like a good idea. Arsé-kun: Angra: Maim? Curse for the rest of his horrible life? Hit him with a car! Sheepy: Satoru: Oh, okay. Arsé-kun: Angra: Hooray! *he is Excited!* Izou-san! Lets get drunk! Sheepy: Izou: What's goin' on, anyway? ...Well, I want alcohol! Sheepy: Izou: Yeah, let's get absolutely smashed! Arsé-kun: Angra: Hell yeah! Arsé-kun: Mori: .... Holmes, if I may? How did you reach your conclusion? Sheepy: Holmes: What? I just listened to the explanation. Sheepy: Holmes: But I had suspicions. Arsé-kun: Mori: It's good to know we were on the same page this time. Sheepy: Holmes: For example... Sheepy: Holmes: He wasn't allowed at Chaldea's ember fields, meaning that his Master wasn't related to Chaldea. Arsé-kun: Mori: And if his Master had perished a more regular way, he would know about it. Sheepy: Holmes: He's dirty and eating out of the trash, meaning that his Master doesn't care about his well being. Arsé-kun: Mori: And this matches much of Masanori's behavior. Sheepy: Holmes: Exactly. Sheepy: Satoru: So is he still Masanori's servant? Or my own...? Sheepy: Izou: I don't care about that guy. You have free booze. Arsé-kun: Mori: I would be inclined to say yours. Sheepy: Satoru: Oh, that's good. Sheepy: Izou: Just don't betray me. Sheepy: Izou: Or I might want to, uh...is the phrase, "bite the hand that feeds me"? Arsé-kun: Mori: That's it, and very understandable. But you will not be betrayed to that level. Sheepy: Izou: Good. And don't give me smelly veggies either. Sheepy: Izou: I hate smelly veggies. Arsé-kun: Mori: That I cannot guarantee. Sheepy: Izou: If you follow all that, I'll be loyal. Sheepy: Satoru: But what if the stinky veggies are good? Sheepy: Izou:....... Sheepy: Izou: *he crosses his arms and tilts his head* ..... Sheepy: Izou: But they're stinky. Arsé-kun: Angra: So were you, what's ya point? Sheepy: Izou:...Okay, fine, I GUESS it's fine, but I won't like it! Sheepy: Holmes: You probably know my name. Sheepy: Izou: I don't. Sheepy: Holmes: Sherlock Holmes. Sheepy: Izou: I don't. Arsé-kun: Mori: *hes just smirking at Sherlock* Sheepy: Holmes: How... Sheepy: Izou: Okay, old man, you next. Arsé-kun: Mori: You are permitted to call me Moriarty. Sheepy: Izou: Alright. Sheepy: Izou: I'm Okada Izou. Arsé-kun: *Minako's hand dives into her pocket for a phone or her compact- Whichever comes first. Who is this guy? Let's find out* Sheepy: Izou: What is that? Arsé-kun: Minako: My phone? You can't eat it. It isn't food, no matter how much we wish it was! Sheepy: Izou: Nah, I was thinking it could be a weapon. Wouldn't be the first time. Sheepy: Izou: I'm that scary! Sheepy: Izou: You see that, right? How scary I am? Sheepy: Satoru: You look like a pomeranian. Arsé-kun: Minako: Oh, you're right.. Sheepy: Izou: Yeah, that sounds real intimidating! Arsé-kun: Angra: .... ....... *he says nothing.* Sheepy: Izou: Yeah, yeah, I look like a pomeranian! Fuhahahaha! I don't even know what that is! I love the sound of it! Sheepy: Izou: You really get it! Sheepy: Satoru: You're fluffy and easily excited like one. Sheepy: Izou:...Wait, what IS a pomeranian!? Arsé-kun: Angra: *he snorts into his booze* Sheepy: Holmes: *he is on google* Okada Izou...huh. Arsé-kun: *Nobody answers the question. But by all the smirks and suppressed laughs, probably not a good thing.* Sheepy: Holmes: *he reads off the brief description on google* Arsé-kun: Mori: Thank you, ace detective, for using your detective skills to open wikipedia. Sheepy: Holmes: Yes, you're welcome. Sheepy: Izou: Once again, I'm not an assassin. Sheepy: Izou: I'm a manslayer. Sheepy: Yan: *he's got his feet up on the table while drinking booze* Arsé-kun: Minako: Who let you in? Sheepy: Yan: Myself? Arsé-kun: Minako: Again? Sheepy: Yan: Yeah. Arsé-kun: Minako: You don't have, like, Chaldea things to do? Sheepy: Yan: Like what? *he takes a sip of the alcohol* Arsé-kun: Minako: Do you just bum around with the doctor's money? Sheepy: Yan: No. Arsé-kun: Minako: That's a surprise. Sheepy: Yan: I don't use her money. Arsé-kun: Minako: Then where do you get any from? Sheepy: Yan: I work? Sheepy: Yan: Old man has paid me before. I won't disclose any other employers of mine. Sheepy: Yan: I WILL say the detective is paying me for something, though. Arsé-kun: Mink: If it's drugs, can you tell me so I can punch him? :) Sheepy: Yan: No, no. Sheepy: Yan: I don't have that sort of stuff anyway. Arsé-kun: Minako: Good! Sheepy: Yan: No, instead- oh, actually, it's important Old Man hears this anyway. Sheepy: Yan: He's paying me not to turn into him. Arsé-kun: Mori: Oh, I can understand that. You would give away his mystery far too quickly. *he seems amused* But what if I pay you more? Sheepy: Yan: Hmmm....... Sheepy: Yan: Oh, that'd work. Arsé-kun: Mori: But did he ever say why? Sheepy: Yan: Something along the lines of... Sheepy: Yan: "The thing inside of me could kill each and every person in this household in the blink of an eye if it so pleased. I don't trust you with that." Arsé-kun: Mori: You know what? That's fair. Sheepy: Yan: But I'm pretty trustworthy. Sheepy: Yan: Anyway, that's a hint, isn't it? That means it's not human. Arsé-kun: Mori: It absolutely is not. I can confirm that much myself. Sheepy: Yan: What do you mean? Arsé-kun: Mori: I spoke to him about it myself. Sheepy: Yan: Huh. Arsé-kun: Mori: Well, let's just agree to try that out nowhere near civilization. But not now. Sheepy: Yan: Yeah, okay. Arsé-kun: Angra: *he looks up. he's cleaned up at least half the booze by himself. the void can take a lot of it, but he seems absolutely hammered based on being unable to stand up for a solid 20 seconds. Yan's leg is used for the assist.* Hey. Hey, bruh, you ever realize how fucked up we really are? Sheepy: Yan: What do you mean? Arsé-kun: Angra: We're all dead already n' shit! And, and then people, like.. *vague hand gestures* the dead people? Does this shit count as necrophilia? And no matter what we do, we're still dead, that's depressing as hell. Sheepy: Yan:....*he takes a rather large sip of his alcohol* Arsé-kun: Angra: I think I jus' gave myself depression. Sheepy: Yan: Good job. Arsé-kun: Angra: You've got like fifteen second opinions, how do I deal with this shit? Sheepy: Yan: What's that supposed to mean?? Sheepy: *Lobo has his snout in Yan's chip bag. Yan is too focused on Angra to notice* Arsé-kun: Angra: How do you, like, stop being depressed so the throne doesn't decide "Ooh that's canon now!" and force it on you every time you start to sort of exist? Sheepy: Yan: I dunno. Sheepy: *Yan absentmindedly goes to put his hand in the chip bag, only to touch Lobo instead* Sheepy: Yan: My chips are weirdly hairy. Arsé-kun: Angra: That's a dog. Sheepy: Yan: ...! Puppy, no, that's human food. Sheepy: Lobo: *he looks up at them, the chip bag on his snout. elegant* Arsé-kun: Angra: th' king of currenpaw, errybody. Sheepy: Yan: I don't really want it anymore. Arsé-kun: Angra: but dammit, I was hopin' for any sorta reply so I could complain at you. All like, "What, you have an answer? Who's you, where's the real Yan at?" Or somethin'. *he thinks he is funny. funny enough to laugh at. angra.* Sheepy: Yan:.... Arsé-kun: Angra: ... What? Sheepy: Yan: Who am I...? Arsé-kun: Mori: All right, that's quite enough of this. *he interrupts and blocks Angra, who may or may not have gotten smacked with a coffin* You're Yan Qing, and that isn't changing. Sheepy: Yan: I...I don't know...! Sheepy: Yan: If that's who I am...then why are they always here!? Why do they keep talking to me!? They're all me, aren't they? What even am I? Arsé-kun: Mori: A gigantic mess vaguely shaped like a human being, with an appreciation for women. Sheepy: Yan:....!? Sheepy: Lobo: *boof* Sheepy: Yan: Does that mean I'm human...or do I just look it...? Arsé-kun: Mori: You're more human than any present Avengers. Sheepy: Yan:....Ah....you're right. Arsé-kun: Mori: *he covers his mouth with one hand, slightly muffling his own voice* Earth to Assassin, are you still in there? Hello, hello? *he reaches up with his free hand to... ruffle Yan's hair. aw.* We are departing planet Meltdown for a return trip to Earth. Can you read, over? Sheepy: Yan:...? Sheepy: Yan: Wh...what...? Arsé-kun: Mori: Welcome back to Earth, Assassin. *he makes a radio static sound. krshhh* You were going straight for an endless loop of existential crisis. Sheepy: Yan: I...I'm sorry, I'm feeling better. Sheepy: Lobo: *he tilts his head. where did that noise come from* Arsé-kun: Mori: Don't apologize. *krshh* What outlaw apologizes for a minor inconvenience? *he finally uncovers his mouth. he does not, however, take his coffin off of Angra, who tried to move it at some point and it is now on top of him. He deserved it.* Sheepy: Lobo: *he tilts his head the other way* Sheepy: Yan: Thank you. Arsé-kun: Mori: Of course. Just don't make a deal of it. Reputation, you understand. Sheepy: Yan: Yes, I do. Arsé-kun: Mori: Then consider this moment of weakness ignored and discarded in exchange. Sheepy: Yan: Thank you. Sheepy: Yan: Puppy, you won't tell anyone, right? Arsé-kun: Mori: *he cups his hands over his mouth again to Krshh at Lobo. extreme teasing* Sheepy: Lobo: ????? Sheepy: Lobo: *he slowly lifts up a paw before ... slapping it over Yan's mouth* Sheepy: Yan: Puppy, why?! Sheepy: Lobo: ?!?!?! Arsé-kun rolled a die. The die showed: 6 Arsé-kun: Mori: *try not to laugh. succeed. Krshh at Lobo again with eye contact* Sheepy: Lobo: *he sniffs at Mori's hand. how is he doing this* Arsé-kun: *Mori holds his hands out for Lobo* Sheepy: Lobo: *he sniffs at both. why do they smell like chips* Arsé-kun: Mori: *he swats the chips off of Lobo's nose* Sheepy: Lobo:....! *what fell, what was that* Sheepy: Yan: *he's petting Lobo. big. fluffy* Arsé-kun: *Mink has opted to give this episode some space and started messaging Haku. Now she gets an update AND has to stop working for ten seconds. Tepes approves already. Two birds, one Gandr* Sheepy: Haku: [Text: to Mink] What is it? Arsé-kun: Mink: [text: to Haku] Issss it normal for ur Assass to just sorta uh, existential break for a minute? Sheepy: Haku: [Text: to Mink] Yes. Arsé-kun: Mink: [text: to Haku] oh. I thought that was a bad thing. I mean Mori.san dealt with it really fast,? But uh Arsé-kun: Mink: [text: to Haku] I remember the rules! Should I bring him back to you so that doesnt, again? Sheepy: Haku: [Text: to Mink] Yes, it's a bad thing, and... Sheepy: Haku: [Text: to Mink] Yes, please bring him. Arsé-kun: Mink: [text: to Haku] Ok!! 👌👌👌 I'll pull him off Lobo and we'll be there! Sheepy: Haku: [Text: to Mink] Thank You Arsé-kun: Mink: [text: to Haku] You're welcome, Haku, Miss! Be there soon!! Sheepy: Lobo: *he gently nudges Mori with his snout. he'll find the source of the noise eventually* Arsé-kun: Mori: Yes? Yes, what is it? Sheepy: Haku: [Text: to Mink] Ok Sheepy: Lobo: *he tilts his head* Arsé-kun: Minako: *she thinks about how she's going to go about this. What would Mephisto do? ... This is a very bad course of thinking and takes a few bad plans to reach a good one that does not require explosives.* Arsé-kun: Mori: *he grins at Lobo and... KRRSSHH!* Sheepy: Lobo:!!! Sheepy: *Lobo sniffs at Mori's face. where is it coming from* Arsé-kun: *the sound is coming from the Moriarty!* Sheepy: Lobo:...! *he looks excited! How is he doing that!?* Arsé-kun: Minako: Not to interrupt or anything, but hey, Assassin. If I pay, can I borrow you to help me get pizzas? :D c Sheepy: Yan: Mm? Oh, okay. Sheepy: Yan: Okay, Puppy, be good while I'm gone. Don't eat too much out of the garbage. Sheepy: Lobo: *he yawns in Yan's face* Arsé-kun: Minako: Cool, thanks! Here's the, uh, 'thanks for helping' start payment! *she hands Yan some cash and a few embers. mmm good shit* Sheepy: Yan: *he pockets them and gets up* Great, let's go! Arsé-kun: *Mori finally "notices" his coffin is on Angra and frees the poor bastard right before they Head Outtie. Chaldea, hoooo* Sheepy: Yan: So, what pizza are we getting? Arsé-kun: *Minako promptly goes OFF about pizza. Girl likes her pizza, and knows how everybody in her crew (except Sherlock) likes it! She will learn his order eventually and he'll damn like it* Sheepy: Yan: Huh. Arsé-kun: Minako: So anyway, you're helping, so I'll buy you some too. Sheepy: Yan: Oh, that's great! Sheepy: Yan: I like...actually, I don't really care what's on it. Sheepy: Yan: I like experimenting. Sheepy: Yan: There's no food I really hate so I'll accept anything. Arsé-kun: Minako: So we figure it out when we get there, gotcha! Sheepy: Yan: Yeah, just mess me up. Arsé-kun: Tepes: I'm just as capable of that. *he strolls in, grabs Yan, and goes to exit scene. oh.* Sheepy: Yan: OH? Arsé-kun: *But the most important part of any plan is improvising on the fly!!* Sheepy: Yan: But my pizza! Arsé-kun: Minako: Oh, no, my pizza buddy! *and she "chases" after Tepes, at the speed of a brisk walk, maybe even, if she's daring, a jog.* Arsé-kun: Tepes: I found him, dear. It was far less trying than I expected. Sheepy: Haku: Thank you. Sheepy: Yan: I've been tricked, betrayed! Arsé-kun: Tepes: ..? Sheepy: Yan: That's why I was dragged out, out of the comfort of Puppy's fur! Arsé-kun: Minako: My evil plot's been foiled! *she catches up* I was really going to give you pizza, too! Sheepy: Yan: Pizza... Sheepy: Yan: Why did you want me, Tepes? Sheepy: Yan: Oh, oh! My dashing good looks and charming smile havs finally gotten to you! Hehe! Arsé-kun: Tepes: I was only informed of the 'Bringing you here' portion of this so called "evil plot". ... And I'm still straight. Sheepy: Yan: Oh!? So it's not that after all? Arsé-kun: Tepes: If it's ever that, assume I am completely broken and most likely need to be put down. Sheepy: Yan: You're so cruel... Sheepy: Yan: What about you, Haku?! Sheepy: Haku: No. Sheepy: Yan: Oh...such a quick response... Sheepy: Yan: But, like, I'm attractive, aren't I? Arsé-kun: Caligula: roma Arsé-kun: *thank you for your input, caligula. it is very useful.* Sheepy: Yan: See, Caligula agrees. Sheepy: Haku: Hmm. Arsé-kun: Minako: I already paid him to help with my pizza run..! Can we get that out of the way at least? Sheepy: Haku: Go ahead. Sheepy: Gawain: I want pizza, too. Sheepy: Yan: Oh! Great! You can buy it! Arsé-kun: Cali: *pizza run? run? running? olympic running? greeks? romans? roma? roma!* *with this incredible stretch of logic and wisdom, Caligula decides to grab Yan and exit the scene at a high speed. Goodbye. it is pizza run time.* Sheepy: Gawain: And there they go. Sheepy: Haku: Oh, that frightens me. Arsé-kun: Minako: ... Uh, okay. I'm glad I told him the order at least? Sheepy: Haku: That's fortunate. Arsé-kun: Minako: I hope he remembers it? Sheepy: Gawain: But he didn't get mine. Sheepy: Yan: [text: to Mink] Like 15 cheeses huh Arsé-kun: Mink: ..... ..... He did not. Sheepy: Gawain: But my order. Arsé-kun: *mink carefully types out the entire thing, clearly, in list format, edited for clarity and spelling, and then pauses* Arsé-kun: Minako: I'll add it in, what'cha want, Sir? Sheepy: Gawain: I like pineapple pizza. Arsé-kun: Minako: Okay! *she adds that in and sends it off. no judgement, surprisingly* Sheepy: Gawain: I can give you the equivalent in flowers. *he laughs* I do have money, though, so I'll pay you for mine. Sheepy: Gawain: *he takes out his wallet* But you should visit my flower shop. I'll give you a discount. Arsé-kun: Minako: Oooh! I'll have to stop by later then! :Dc Sheepy: Gawain: Yeah! Arsé-kun: Minako: But uh... Yeah, Probably should have stopped that whole thing from happening. Sorry about that! Sheepy: Haku: I understand. Arsé-kun: Minako: Am... I allowed to ask about all that, or is that a patient confidence thing? Arsé-kun: Minako: Cuz, uhm.. Moriarty-san dealt with it really fast, like it's a thing we should know about? Sheepy: Haku: Oh. Sheepy: Haku: He's not a full servant. Sheepy: Haku: He's mixed with a phantom, Doppelganger Arsé-kun: Minako: So like... A second of himself? Sheepy: Haku: Of everyone he's killed. Arsé-kun: Minako: And that's... A lot? Sheepy: Haku: It allows him to transform into anyone, but the voices of his victims remain. Sheepy: Haku: Yes. Arsé-kun: Minako: Yikes. Good thing he's with you then, I guess? Sheepy: Gawain: He's always eyeing the same women I am, so if your plan is to let him stay with them... Sheepy: Gawain: Oh, I should ask him for the phone number he got. Arsé-kun: Tepes: That is your priority? Sheepy: Gawain: What should my priority be? Arsé-kun: Tepes: Not phone numbers of randoms you haven't met yourself. Sheepy: Gawain: Well, do you have any better ideas? Arsé-kun: Tepes: Meet people yourself? Sheepy: Gawain: I do, but usually only for one night. Arsé-kun: Tepes: Go directly to church, do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars. Sheepy: Gawain: Oh, it's not as though I don't still love my wife. Sheepy: Gawain: However, now that I'm a servant, I can have fun, maybe find a new wife in the process. Arsé-kun: Tepes: .... Fair enough. Sheepy: Gawain: You're no different. Sheepy: Gawain: I just choose different tactics. More bold tactics. Arsé-kun: Minako: ... Hey, I just caught something. What'd you mean 'Let him stay with them'?? Sheepy: Gawain: Well, if Moriarty helps him a lot, wouldn't it be better if he stayed with Moriarty? Arsé-kun: Minako: Makes sense, but he isn't mine? Sheepy: Gawain: He could be. Arsé-kun: Minako: Moriarty isn't mine, I mean! I've got objections about Yan but.. Wait, he doesn't live here? Sheepy: Haku: He bums off of everyone here, but especially us. Arsé-kun: Minako: So he does! He said he didn't! Sheepy: Haku: He's not my Servant, but he likes Tepes, Caligula, and me. He also likes both our and Gawain's food. Sheepy: Haku: That's usually why he's seen with me. Sheepy: Gawain:...Hey, hold on... Sheepy: Gawain: You forgot me in that first list. Sheepy: Haku: But anyway, who is Moriarty's master? How close do they live to you? Arsé-kun: Minako: My neighbor, and my neighbor. Sheepy: Haku: I don't know. You or your neighbor might be best with taking him, but he'd probably end up staying here just as often as he already does. Sheepy: Haku: He's a part of different clubs and has close friends who live here. Arsé-kun: Minako: I don't think that'd be a problem. I mean, some of mine come here two or three times a week already. Sheepy: Haku: That's good. Sheepy: Haku: Are you fine with this? We'll need to ask him when he gets back. Arsé-kun: Minako: I'm fine with it! Sheepy: Haku: Good. Sheepy: Gawain: I get more chances at women this way. Thanks for that. Arsé-kun: *Tepes pinches the bridge of his nose. Jesus Christ.* Sheepy: Gawain: You need to learn how to have more fun in life. Arsé-kun: Tepes: I can have fun without shamelessly flirting with every woman I spot, thank you. Sheepy: Gawain: I have an idea! Sheepy: Gawain: You can go out with me next time. Arsé-kun: Tepes: Why not take Caligula? You'll look far better next to him. Sheepy: Gawain: I'd look far better next to you, too. Arsé-kun: Tepes: I'm detecting an insult. Sheepy: Gawain: I'd never. Arsé-kun: Tepes: And if you have realized, what you have said also translates to "Hey, vampire, come out at night surrounded by a lot of people." Please spot the problem. Sheepy: Gawain: Oh, I forgot you were a vampire. Arsé-kun: Tepes: For now, I'll respectfully decline your offer, unless you come across a daytime event. Then I may consider it. Sheepy: Gawain: I can arrange for it to be a daytime event. Arsé-kun: Tepes: No, no. Sheepy: Gawain: Why? Arsé-kun: Tepes: Don't force others' to plan around me. Sheepy: Gawain: Well, alright. Arsé-kun: Cali: PIZZA! *thank you for your announcement, Caligula. He is carrying... Two boxes. Out of how much?* Sheepy: Gawain: I hope one is pineapple! Sheepy: Yan: Tepes! Gawain! I'm dying! Arsé-kun: Tepes: It's just a few boxes. Are you a Heroic Spirit, or some kind of mouse? Sheepy: Yan: It's HOT!! Sheepy: Yan: ...But not as hot as me- AaaaAAAA DON'T FALL!! Sheepy: Gawain: He stole my line...he has to go. Arsé-kun: Tepes: *he moves in for the Assist. he's help* Arsé-kun: Cali: pizza Sheepy: Yan: You could've helped, Caligula. Arsé-kun: Cali: Rgh? *he puts down his boxes* ?? Sheepy: Yan: You left me with everything else.. Arsé-kun: Cali: *he takes the stack from Yan and puts it down. He has now helped. Confused thumbs up.* Sheepy: Yan: Owowow...it was so hot! Sheepy: Gawain: Like- Sheepy: Yan: Like me. Arsé-kun: Tepes: Stop. Sheepy: Yan: But who else will say it if not me? Arsé-kun: Tepes: Anyone else with an ego over ten. Sheepy: Yan: But comic relief is one of my defining character traits. Arsé-kun: *Tepes opts out of giving this a response.* Arsé-kun: Minako: Anyway! You've made it this far! A bit more and we're home! With pizza! Arsé-kun: *she is eyeing the pizza boxes already. mm. pizz.* Sheepy: Yan: You're right. Arsé-kun: Minako: You can stay too, if you want! Sheepy: Yan: Huh? Arsé-kun: Minako: I mean, you're over enough! Sheepy: Yan: ....! Arsé-kun: Minako: I'm pretty sure nobody hates you on my end, and considering who I've got, that's impressive! Sheepy: Yan: Thank you...! Arsé-kun: Minako: You're welcome!!! Arsé-kun: Mephisto: What're you doin', Master? Dating a boy? *how long has he been there, in the doorway?* Without me, even?? *he's kidding, I hope.* Sheepy: Yan: What? Arsé-kun: Minako: Please, no. *she is unfazed by 100% of that. She knew he was there.* I won't stop you though! Go forth and be gay, and merry, and help us bring home pizza. Arsé-kun: *Mephisto considers this, and promptly fucks off. Oh.* Arsé-kun: Minako: ... So I'm still paying you in full I guess, Assassin! Sheepy: Yan: Oh, for what? Arsé-kun: Minako: For... Carrying pizza?? Sheepy: Yan:...Great! Arsé-kun: *OK enough dicking around, they're gonna get home eventually, with the pizza, and Yan gets paid right before that. cash fuckin' money* Sheepy: Holmes: Oh, it's pizza. Arsé-kun: Mephisto: Yeah, it is! Did you think I was making it up? Sheepy: Holmes: No, I didn't. Sheepy: Holmes: I hope you enjoy it. I'll be passing, of course. Arsé-kun: Minako: Eh? Sheepy: Holmes: I'm not hungry currently. Arsé-kun: Proto: It's pizza time, hurry! Dibs, I call first dibs! *and he zips in, nearly faceplanting into the table. gg idiot* Sheepy: Holmes: That's the benefit of being a Servant. Arsé-kun: Minako: Fair enough, but if you want some later, there might not be any! Sheepy: Holmes: I don't have an interest in it, and Watson would kill me if he found me eating it. Arsé-kun: Minako: What's he gonna do to you? Hit you for resisted damage? Sheepy: Holmes: Nag me. Arsé-kun: Minako: Is nagging strong against Rulers? Sheepy: Holmes: Perhaps. Arsé-kun: Minako: I'll have to try that later! Sheepy: Holmes: For what reason? Arsé-kun: Minako: For science? Sheepy: Holmes: I'd rather you didn't. Sheepy: Gil: *he huffs* Mongrel food again? Arsé-kun: Minako: You're gonna eat it anyway. Sheepy: Kogil: I like pep- Sheepy: Gil: Pepperoni is garbage, pup. Sheepy: Gil: Cheese is better. Arsé-kun: Minako: Thank you for your opinions, kings! I didn't ask! Sheepy: Gil: Hah, if he wants to be a king, he needs to know how a king thinks. Arsé-kun: Lance: ... A king thinks "Is this edible?" and then eats it. Immediately, without comment. Sheepy: Gil: That's how a peasant thinks. Arsé-kun: Lance: ... No, you. *he's got no witty comebacks, and glances towards Yan* ..? Sheepy: Yan: Hi hi! I'm living here now. Sheepy: Yan: I don't know why but that's what's been decided. Arsé-kun: Lance: Aaah? That is.. It's something. Unexpected? Sheepy: Yan: Actually, Gawain was cheering in his own way. Arsé-kun: Lance: Git. Sheepy: Yan: Huh? Sheepy: Yan: He's burly and looks like a football player so he's not really attractive. He asks me for phone numbers often. Sheepy: Yan: So he probably thinks he got rid of competition. Arsé-kun: Lance: He still..? ... GorrRRrrilla morrron. Sheepy: Yan: I don't get why. Sheepy: Yan: I just like talking to pretty people, and I like it even more when they compliment me. Sheepy: Yan: But Gawain sees me as competition... Arsé-kun: Lance: Everrryone is competition... Don't worry about ittt.. Sheepy: Yan: Even you? Arsé-kun: Lance: I hope nooot. Sheepy: Yan: Are men in armor hot nowadays? Sheepy: Holmes: Depending on the temperature, yes. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: You've made Hyde very happy with that answer. I don't have to say it now, thank you. Sheepy: Holmes: You're welcome. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: And thank you for dinner, Master. You too, Assassin. Sheepy: Yan: No problem. Arsé-kun: Minako: Of course! Sheepy: Lobo: *he struts in and flops over dramatically onto Lance* Arsé-kun: Lance: Nooooooooonnn! *he tries to get out from under Lobo* Sheepy: Lobo: *whine* Sheepy: Yan: Puppy! Sheepy: *...Despite his whining, Lobo's tail is wagging. He's very aware of his manipulation and is happy about it.* Arsé-kun: *Lance does not escape. He accepts his fate to starve.* Sheepy: Yan: Puppy, you can have my pizza if you get off of him. Sheepy: Lobo: *he gives Yan a suspicious look* Sheepy: *Lobo hesitantly gets off of Lance* Arsé-kun: *Lancelot is dead. Not really. But he's already committed.* Sheepy: Gil: A king doesn't beg. He demands. Sheepy: Lobo: *he turns to Gil before...eating his slice of pizza.* Arsé-kun: Medusa: I don't know what you expected. Sheepy: Gil: Not that! How dare him! Arsé-kun: Andersen: Just take another, your highness. And while you're up there, pass me a plate. Sheepy: Gil: *he huffs, but surprisingly does so* Arsé-kun: Andersen: Thank you. You're spared. Sheepy: Gil: Be grateful, mongrel! Arsé-kun: Andersen: I am. Sheepy: Gil: Fuhahaha! Excellent! Arsé-kun: Andersen: So what? Is this uncertain jeste- Arsé-kun: Mephisto: Hey, wait. Sheepy: Yan: Huh? Arsé-kun: Andersen: You're a piece of shit, not a jester. Anyway, is this uncertain tall drink of water and booze staying with us now? Sheepy: Yan: Me? Arsé-kun: Andersen: Yes, you. Sheepy: Yan: Yeah, that's apparently the case. Arsé-kun: Andersen: Finally, an assassin that keeps their class. It's about time. Sheepy: Yan: Yeah! Sorta. Arsé-kun: Andersen: More than Twit and Twat over here. Good enough. Sheepy: Yan: Great! Sheepy: Holmes: You're only missing Avenger, R..ider, you do have a rider... Arsé-kun: Medusa: Do you have eyes? Sheepy: Holmes: Exactly two, no more. Arsé-kun: Medusa: Do they both work? Do you need a hint from the peanut gallery? Arsé-kun: *she's genuinely asking, that's not sarcasm* Sheepy: Holmes: I'm aware you're a rider. Arsé-kun: Medusa: Then what is missing? Avenger and what? Sheepy: Holmes: Hmmm? Sheepy: Holmes: Did I say there were two missing? Sheepy: Holmes: I only meant Avenger. Sheepy: Holmes: Ah, of course ... Sheepy: Holmes: We're also missing, of the special classes, Shielder, Alter Ego, Moon Cancer...yes, that's it. Arsé-kun: Minako: And let's maybe not get that last one. Sheepy: Holmes: Right. Sheepy: Emiya: ....*he raises his eyebrows* Arsé-kun: Andersen: Skip Alter Ego. They're all extremely difficult in different ways. Sheepy: Holmes: That's understandable. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: And the single Shielder belongs to Chaldea. We'd have to pass. Sheepy: Emiya: What about Foreigner? Arsé-kun: Minako: ...?? *she's got her mouth full* ???? Sheepy: Holmes: *he forces a smile* I don't know of it. Arsé-kun: Andersen: .... ..... Arsé-kun: Minako: What's foreigner? That new? Sheepy: Emiya: Ah, Master. Based on what I've heard, the Foreigner class is a recently discovered class. Arsé-kun: Minako: That's kinda exciting! What do they do? Sheepy: Emiya: As the name implies, it consists of hosts of otherworldly beings. Sheepy: Emiya: Berserkers do very little to them. Arsé-kun: Minako: Berserkers... I don't like that very much. Sheepy: Emiya: They, meanwhile, easily slaughter Berserkers. Be careful. Sheepy: Holmes:.... Arsé-kun: Minako: Noted. Thanks, Emiya-san. Sheepy: Holmes: (What do we do?) Arsé-kun: Holmes?: (...? We're doing something? Why?) Sheepy: Holmes: (It's clear Andersen suspects us.) Arsé-kun: Holmes?: (Who?) Sheepy: Holmes: (The one with blue hair and glasses.) Arsé-kun: Holmes?: (... Why are you asking me..? My answer is always 'flatten it') Sheepy: Holmes: (...Right, thanks.) Arsé-kun: Holmes?: (You're... Welcome?) Sheepy: Holmes: You might want to try to find one to deal with Berserkers, then. Arsé-kun: Minako: But we can hit Berserkers with anything. Sheepy: Holmes: But they do extra damage in turn. Arsé-kun: Minako: Ehhh.. *she shrugs* Bomb 'em and run like hell, I guess. Sheepy: Holmes: I see. Arsé-kun: Holmes?: (I don't!) Sheepy: Holmes: (I know) Sheepy: Holmes: (But you have my eyes.) Arsé-kun: Holmes?: (It helps a lot!) Sheepy: Holmes: (I'm glad.) Arsé-kun: *Hans continues to be suspicious. Nothing has changed. But thankfully, he's the only one. Maybe?* Sheepy: Holmes:..... Arsé-kun: Andersen: ...... Sheepy: Holmes: Did you have something you wanted to ask me? Arsé-kun: Andersen: I did. Sheepy: Holmes: What is it? Arsé-kun: Andersen: *he scribbles something down on a napkin, folds it, and passes it over.* That. Sheepy: Holmes: *he reads it* Arsé-kun: *All it says is "I won't say anything, Sir." There's a bad thumbs up emoji next to it. "Why do you look more introspective than Henry when Hyde's being a bitch?"* Sheepy: Holmes: *he writes something down and passes it back* Arsé-kun: Andersen: *he takes it and opens it* Sheepy: *"I have a companion of my own, who happens to be relevant currently."* Arsé-kun: Andersen: ... *he nods to Sherlock and pockets the napkin* Sheepy: Gil: What am I missing? Sheepy: Gil: I don't care but I don't appreciate secrets being hid from me. Arsé-kun: Andersen: We're talking shit about Mr. Twat. Sheepy: Gil: Oh, I really don't care then. Arsé-kun: Andersen: I knew you had it in you. Sheepy: Gil: What? Arsé-kun: Andersen: Doesn't a great king not care what the peasants say? Sheepy: Kogil: He cares because it's his job to serve his people. Arsé-kun: Andersen: So I can't call him a nosy bitch and move on with my life? What a shame. Sheepy: Kogil: Huh? Oh, no, he is. Sheepy: Gil: Oh...you... Sheepy: Gil: You...! Arsé-kun: Andersen: .... ... You weren't supposed to agree with me. I enjoy living. Sheepy: Kogil: Curiosity is what makes us human. Sheepy: Kogil: Unfortunately, being nosy is being a little too curious. Arsé-kun: Medusa: So what's that make the floating cupcake? *he points up to Mephisto, who looks more amused than insulted* A moron? Sheepy: Kogil: Humanity isn't something you're born with. Sheepy: Kogil: It's something you achieve. Sheepy: Kogil: Anyone can become human. They just have to want to try. Sheepy: Gil: Why would they want to? Arsé-kun: Medusa: It's better than being a beast. Sheepy: Gil: Hah. It's true. Arsé-kun: Medusa: Most things are better than that, though. It's kind of a low bar. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: *he shifts a bit closer to Yan, getting out of Lance's way* ... It's nice to have another Assassin on board. We get pressured beyond belief against Riders, haha.. Sheepy: Yan: That really sounds like a problem. Sheepy: Yan: But worry not! I have experience with Riders. Sheepy: Yan: Like Puppy used to be a Rider. Weren't you, Puppy? Sheepy: Lobo: *he lifts his head up from sniffing at Lance and blinks at Yan* Arsé-kun: Jekyll: Was he? I would understand if his, well, rider was, but he himself? Sheepy: Yan: They act as one unit. Sheepy: Yan: But he isn't three phantoms combined into one. Sheepy: Yan: Those are just the three who survived. Sheepy: Yan: Lobo ate the rest to gain their powers, which is how he ended up an Avenger. Sheepy: Yan: But before that, they were just the Rider class. Sheepy: Yan: Kind of like Kintoki's motorcycle. He is the rider, but without his motorcycle, can he really be called one? It's the motorcycle that defines him as a Rider, and therefore, it's a part of his identity as a Rider. Simply, it too could be considered part of the Rider class. Sheepy: Yan: However, it couldn't be summoned without Kintoki, because its identity isn't well known. Likewise, Kintoki couldn't be summoned within the Rider class without his motorcycle. Similarly, Lobo couldn't be summoned without his rider nor Jack, which could be said for the other two. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: I understand entirely. Sheepy: Yan: That's the situation Old Man and I have as well. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: Let me see if I got this straight. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: It's like trying to summon me without Hyde, or Hyde without me. Without the other, neither of us are worth much. Sheepy: Yan: Mostly. Sheepy: Yan: We couldn't survive without our partner. Sheepy: Yan: Our presence isn't strong enough. We're just phantoms. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: I'd believe it still applies, honestly. At least to me. Sheepy: Yan: But even little droplets of rain add up to a flood. Sheepy: Yan: So when enough phantoms come together... Sheepy: Yan: Our power is such of a Heroic Spirit's. Sheepy: Yan: So very similar to your situation. Sheepy: Yan: But while you two come from the same source, we get merged with strangers. Sheepy: Yan: Really, the one who intimidates me in that respect is Old Man. The whole thing about his partner phantom's story is hurting the one you love unintentionally. Sheepy: Yan: Lobo's just many hateful spirits in one, and I'm not of much interest in that respect. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: *he thinks about this.* I... "I" want to know now, but I think if you've got no interest in talking about it, then lets pass it by. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: But could that be why he and Sherlock haven't knocked the walls down yet? Arsé-kun: Jekyll: Because if he comes to care for Sherlock, the bullets might target him? Sheepy: Yan: I don't think so. Sheepy: Yan: I think they're mutually using each other to some extent, and... Arsé-kun: Jekyll: ... And? Sheepy: Yan: Look at it this way. Let's say they fought, and that cursed bullet was accidentally shot. Sheepy: Yan: Who do you think it would hit? Arsé-kun: Jekyll: ... Ah, I see what you were saying. Mutual avoidance. Sheepy: Yan: It's too dangerous for someone in that situation to fight unnecessarily. Sheepy: Yan: I'm sure Holmes recognizes that too. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: Oh, certainly. Arsé-kun: Medusa: You two can just ask him. He's right here. Or is this normal Assassin business? Sheepy: Yan: Yeah, it's normal Assassin business. Sheepy: Yan: It's an exclusive club. Sheepy: Yan: But yeah, that's all I've got. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: I suppose I'll keep it in mind. And try to keep it in "his" too. Sheepy: Yan: Great! Arsé-kun: Minako: Oh, and thanks for behaving this time, everybody! *she lifts up her hand. two command seals have Returned* I'm glad we didn't need to enact violence! Sheepy: Gil: Hah, I could take them if I so pleased. Arsé-kun: Minako: I can take your controllers if I pleased, so what? Sheepy: Gil: I could buy new ones. Arsé-kun: Minako: And while you're gone, hide everything else. Sheepy: Gil:.....My POINT is that you have no control over me. Arsé-kun: Minako: Ok. Sheepy: Gil: Kuhahahaha! You see now, how powerless you are against me, mongrel! Sheepy: Gil: Be grateful! Sheepy: Gil: I have decided to allow you to put on this charade still! Arsé-kun: Minako: Thank you so much for your opinions! They're worth money I think. Sheepy: Gil: Kuhahahaha! Of course! Sheepy: Gil: And you're getting it for free! Sheepy: Gil: Be grateful, mongrel! Arsé-kun: Minako: I'm a bit more grateful for not living on the street, but thanks anyway! Sheepy: Gil: You're welcome. Sheepy: *later, at night!* Sheepy: --- Drip. Drip. Drip. The rain was falling harshly upon Bedivere and Lucan as they carried their king to safety. They barely recognized its uncomfortable sogginess as they slowly persevered. Bedivere was barely conscious of his surroundings until he heard his brother let out a soft, pained groan. “...Lucan, you should rest. I can carry him on my own.” “Don’t worry, I’m fine... it’s just a bit more, isn’t it?” Lucan smiled, but Bedivere couldn’t focus on that. Bright red droplets caught his eye - a sight he had seen regularly that day. Drip. Drip. Drip. Blood was pooling from Lucan’s body. but his smile didn’t fade. He couldn’t let it fade. No, his king needed him. His brother needed him. Once he loses his smile, he loses everything. “Lucan... you’re bleeding.” “I’ve had worse,” Lucan laughed, cut off midway by a sharp pain within him that shook him to his core. But he has to keep smiling. He needs to. Drip. Drip. Drip. Thud. ”LUCAN!” Lucan couldn’t summon the strength to respond. It felt as though his insides had just exploded. His brother’s screams were just background noises as things grew dark, leaving Bedivere alone with his king. “LUCAN...!” Bedivere shot up from his bed, still crying out his brother’s name. The only response he received was the light rain outside. Drip. Drip. Drip. Bedivere used to love the rain. Now all it reminds him of is his failure as a knight. --- Arsé-kun: *Good morning, Bedivere! It is, in fact, lightly raining. According to Merlin's pink digital clock, it is approximately 4:30 AM.* Arsé-kun: *Also of note is Merlin's apparent absence, which is a mystery easily solved. Idiot fell off the bed. The Grand Caster, everybody.* Sheepy: *Bedi looks over at Merlin and contemplates waking him to get him off of the floor* Arsé-kun: *Merlin certainly isn't taking any action to deal with this.* Sheepy: *Bedi gets out of bed and gently shakes Merlin* Sheepy: Bedi: Ummm... Arsé-kun: Merlin: ..... Aye..? Sheepy: Bedi: You're sleeping on the floor. Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... So I was... *He slowly sits up and blinks himself into at least some alertness.* ... Why AM I on the floor..? Sheepy: Bedi: I probably shoved you off, but maybe you rolled off. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I don't feel sore, so probably did it myself. Oopsies!~ :P c Sheepy: Bedi: I'd recommend not sleeping on the floor. Arsé-kun: Merlin: You're right. But why are you down here with me? Sheepy: Bedi: I, uh, I woke up from a nightmare. Arsé-kun: Merlin: *he immediately looks concerned* Are you okay? Sheepy: Bedi: It's no problem! I'm fine. Arsé-kun: Merlin: If you say so.. Are you coming back to bed? Sheepy: Bedi: I think I'm up for the night. Sheepy: Bedi: It's difficult to sleep through the rain. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Aww. Well, hopefully it'll stop soon, for your sake. Sheepy: Bedi: Thank you. I'll be fine. This is normal. Arsé-kun: Merlin: That's what worries me. *he pats Bedi's shoulder, then drags himself up and back onto the bed. Ugh. MOVING. What a CHORE.* Sheepy: Bedi: There's no need to worry. It's normal, so I'm used to it. Arsé-kun: Merlin: That's why I'm worried!! You're going to go Stockholm on your own nightmares.. Sheepy: Bedi:....? Arsé-kun: Merlin: ... I'll tell you in the morning. Sheepy: Bedi: *he forces a smile* Thank you. I'll try to remember in case you forget. Arsé-kun: Merlin: 'Welcome. *he rolls over and pulls the blanket back up.* Sheepy: Bedi: Good night. Arsé-kun: Merlin: 'Ight. Sheepy: Bedi: *he waits for a bit before heading out of the room to find something to do* Arsé-kun: *It's quiet. But not too quiet. This is not a horror film.* Sheepy: Bedi: *is anyone up?* Arsé-kun: *Well, the vampires and Rider, playing a silent game of cards. Vlad looks #done* Sheepy: Lobo: *he is looking at the cards blankly* Sheepy: Lobo: *he looks up and begins snarling* Arsé-kun: Vlad: ...? Sheepy: Bedi: I'm sorry for interrupting. Sheepy: Bedi: I was just looking for something to do. Arsé-kun: Vlad: Ah, that is fine. Do you wish to join us? Sheepy: Bedi: I'm not very good at cards, but... Arsé-kun: Vlad: You do not have to be. Sheepy: Bedi: Then I'd like to join. Arsé-kun: Vlad: Pull up a seat. We're only playing go fish. Sheepy: Bedi: *he pulls up a seat and sits at the table* Arsé-kun: *Vlad deals him a hand and the game continues* Sheepy: Lobo: *he flops over on the ground partway through the game* Arsé-kun: *His cards are distributed accordingly* Sheepy: Bedi: This reminds me of the games I used to play with my fellow knights. Sheepy: Bedi: Some of us were more competitive than others, such as... Sheepy: Bedi:...Sir Lancelot and Sir Gawain. Sheepy: Bedi: Meanwhile, Sir Tristan would fall asleep, on the opposite side of the spectrum. Arsé-kun: Vlad: I'm rather glad this Lancelot does not join us, then. This is not meant to be competitive. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, I agree. Although...I doubt the Berserker would act that way Sheepy: Bedi: However, Saber... Arsé-kun: Vlad: ... I would fear for our quiet evenings. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, our games would get intense very quickly. Arsé-kun: Vlad: Amadeus would have our heads. Sheepy: Bedi: ...However, I would be lying if I said I didn't miss those days. ... Ah, Mozart.... Sheepy: Bedi:...He probably already wants my head. Sheepy: Bedi: I'm sorry if my shouting bothered you. Arsé-kun: Vlad: Not at all. Sheepy: Bedi: I'm happy to hear that. Sheepy: Lobo: *he has turned his attention to chewing on a squeaky toy* Arsé-kun: Vlad: ... This is why. Sheepy: Bedi: Poor Mozart... Arsé-kun: *Suddenly flying down the stairs and whizzing past the table is what looks like a football. Lobo! Get the football!* Sheepy: Lobo: *he launches at the football and grabs it with his teeth* Arsé-kun: *No more squeaky noises!* Sheepy: Lobo: *he plops down on the ground next to Vlad and continues chewing on the football* Arsé-kun: Mozart: How utterly awful that was! *he has arrived downstairs* Sheepy: Bedi: I apologize for my shouting. Arsé-kun: Mozart: That's quite fine. It isn't something you can help. Squeaky toys at 3 am, however... *he shoots Lobo a dirty glare* Sheepy: Lobo: *he ignores Mozart in favor of focusing on the football* Arsé-kun: Mozart: *he snatches up the squeaky toy, and goes to exit after a quick little wave. goodbye mozart* Sheepy: Lobo: *he looks up and blinks. where did his squeaky toy go* Arsé-kun: *it vanished! (thank god)* Sheepy: Lobo: *he stands up and starts sniffing around. does Vlad have it?* Arsé-kun: *Vlad holds his hands up. He does not have it!* Sheepy: Lobo: *he sniffs at Vlad's hands* Arsé-kun: *no toy! Vlad pats his nose though* Sheepy: Lobo: *he nuzzles Vlad in response* Arsé-kun: *good shit op* Sheepy: Bedi: I feel like I should be doing something of importance, being up this late. Arsé-kun: Vlad: It does often feel that way, doesn't it? But perhaps there is. Sheepy: Bedi: There's something I should be doing... Arsé-kun: Vlad: Perhaps, perhaps not. Sheepy: Bedi: What do you think it could be? Arsé-kun: Vlad: I would have no idea. Why don't you take a walk around the halls? It's unlikely you'll be interrupted. Sheepy: Bedi: Oh! Good idea. Arsé-kun: Vlad: And while you do that.. Carmilla? Shall we go out and get lunch? Sheepy: Carmilla: Yeah, sure. Arsé-kun: Vlad: Great, because I was going to go no matter the answer. Sheepy: Carmilla: Wow. Arsé-kun: Vlad: We'd better get going, then, before it gets light out. Sheepy: Carmilla: Yeah. Arsé-kun: *spoop patrol exits scene.* Sheepy: *Bedi, meanwhile, is walking through the halls* Arsé-kun: *It's dark. It's quiet. It's kinda nice, but also a little bit spooky.* Sheepy: *Bedi doesn't mind it.* Arsé-kun: *Thankfully his eyes have adjusted to the darkness, so he can see where he is going. Only the furthest parts of the hall are hard to see, and for some reason a nearby doorway. Maybe it's just the angle he's on.* Sheepy: Bedi:....? Sheepy: *Bedi goes to investigate* Arsé-kun: *It's very dark, even up close. Like, super dark. This isn't normal darkness. This is ADVANCED DARKNESS!* Sheepy: Bedi: *he slowly puts out Airgetlam to touch it* Arsé-kun: *It, strangely enough, shrinks back from his hand. Scared darkness? That's weird.* Sheepy: Bedi:...Hello? Arsé-kun: *The darkness doesn't answer back. This is.. Probably a good thing?* Sheepy: Bedi: Huh. Sheepy: Bedi: I was expecting more of a response...what is this? Sheepy: *Bedi begins poking at it with Airgetlam* Arsé-kun: *It continues retreating, and shrinking. Bedi can now see some of the room. It's nothing special.* Sheepy: Bedi: If only I had a flashlight. Sheepy: Bedi:.... Sheepy: Bedi:.....*he looks to Airgetlam* Sheepy: Bedi: Airgetlam, switch on! *Airgetlam shines brightly!* Arsé-kun: *Some of the room is instantly lit up! The rest is.. Still pitch black. As I said before, this is ADVANCED DARKNESS* Sheepy: Bedi:...! Sheepy: Bedi: *he pokes at it again* Arsé-kun: *The shadows retreat a bit more than they had prior, with a bit of a... Whine? It was something.* Sheepy: Bedi: Oh! It's alive! Sheepy: Bedi: Hello? Arsé-kun: *It eventually stops shrinking, leaving a ball of shadow on the sofa. But no answer.* Sheepy: Bedi: *he gently shakes it* Arsé-kun: *There's a very quiet but distressed "Go awayyy..!" from the shadows, which shift away before becoming a tighter ball.* Sheepy: Bedi: ....? Sheepy: Bedi: I apologize, it's just... Sheepy: Bedi: You...were kind of...um.. Sheepy: Bedi:...well. You piqued my curiosity. Arsé-kun: ?: Dooon't...! *They recoil away from Bedi, despite him not touching them this time.* Jus' kill me and get it over with...! Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? I won't hurt you! Sheepy: Bedi: It's okay. Everything is fine. I'll stand back until you feel comfortable with me approaching, okay? Arsé-kun: ?: ... always do, it's... fault, it's my fault, it's my fault, it's my f*They hiccup really quietly* why why why why why why why whyyyyy*hic*yyyyy..? Sheepy: Bedi: ...? Sheepy: Bedi: What is? Arsé-kun: ?: ... ... .nnn... Arsé-kun: ?: ...... not the carving tools againnnnn... ... anything but... Arsé-kun: *His voice slowly gets louder as he pleads with an unseen enemy, begging them not to hurt him again. It culminates in screaming and violently thrashing up off the sofa- most likely hitting Bedivere (but doing little to no actual damage)- before coming to a stop hanging off of the sofa and panting heavily. Despite all of this, he hasn't actually woken himself up entirely.* Arsé-kun: *As well, now that he has stopped being curled up into a ball, he's now recognizable as Angra (if he wasn't before.)* Sheepy: Bedi: It's okay, it's okay. No one will hurt you here. Arsé-kun: Angra: ... ...? *he slightly looks up at Bedi* ... Sheepy: Bedi: I'm sorry for waking you. However... Arsé-kun: Angra: ... *he blinks, and pauses before jumping up onto the back of the sofa. A very delayed reaction.* H-how long have you been here?? Sheepy: Bedi: Not for too long. Arsé-kun: Angra: *he groans and flops back down* Great, cool! Now my traumatic backstory is out in the wild! Grrrrreat! *he is not pleased.* Sheepy: Bedi: You were having a nightmare, although I didn't realize that at first. *he smiles* Don't worry, I won't tell anyone. Sheepy: Bedi: I was just worried about you, so I stayed with you. Sheepy: Bedi: If I encounter you in such a state in the future, I could get you a blanket and leave you be instead if you would so prefer. Arsé-kun: Angra: ... ... *he looks more confused than anything* Uhm.. Thanks..? Sheepy: Bedi: I apologize if I'm making you uncomfortable. Arsé-kun: Angra: It's not, um. *he huffs and sits up* I did mean thanks, that's real, but.. *he seems conflicted, before just giving up on being subtle* Nobody's ever that nice to me. You know what I am, yeah? Sheepy: Bedi: I do. Sheepy: Bedi: However... Sheepy: Bedi: I would never dislike you. Sheepy: Bedi: It doesn’t matter to me who you are. I won’t treat you poorly because of it. Arsé-kun: Angra: ... ... *he tilts his head to the side* Thank you? A terrible decision, really, but thanks anyway. Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Sheepy: Bedi: I don’t believe so. Sheepy: Bedi: I don’t dislike anyone. Arsé-kun: Angra: Anyone? Not even the dark shady butler guy? Sheepy: Bedi: No, I don’t dislike even him. Arsé-kun: Angra: Huh. Sheepy: Bedi: I see him as a problem to solve, but once he’s no longer attempting to hurt us, I wish him the best. Sheepy: Bedi: Perhaps one might find that odd, but... Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose I’m just an odd individual: Arsé-kun: Angra: *he thinks about this* You really are some sorta screwball, but hey, you're not bad. Sheepy: Bedi: I’m happy to hear that. Sheepy: Bedi: However... Sheepy: Bedi: It saddens me to hear people don’t treat you very nicely. Sheepy: Bedi: Is there anything I could do for you? Sheepy: Bedi: I’m fairly good at cooking simple things and I can make coffee well, so maybe I could make something for you? Arsé-kun: Angra: ... That'd be nice... Sheepy: Bedi: What would you like? Arsé-kun: Angra: Yer asking me? Hm.. Hmmmm! Something edible! Sheepy: Bedi: ... Sheepy: Bedi: Do you have no preference...? Sheepy: Bedi: Ah...then I’ll share my favorite meal with you! Sheepy: Bedi: Do you mind vegetables? Arsé-kun: Angra: Great question! Lets find out. Sheepy: *Bedi goes to the kitchen and begins cooking steamed veggies!* Arsé-kun: *Angra follows him and plops into a chair. Obseeeerve* Sheepy: Bedi: What hobbies do you have? Arsé-kun: Angra: Does people watching count? Caaause if not, I got nothin'. Sheepy: Bedi: I think it does. Sheepy: Bedi: I found watching mankind evolve around me absolutely fascinating. Sheepy: Bedi:...Of course...my wanderings were my punishment, but even still, I enjoyed them to some extent. Sheepy: Bedi: Of course... Sheepy: Bedi: My favorite dish is what it is due to what it reminds me of. Sheepy: Bedi: Of course... Sheepy: Bedi: My favorite dish is what it is due to what it reminds me of. Sheepy: Bedi: The happy times of the Knights of the Round Table. I had it often back then because I loved it even then. Sheepy: Bedi: But now, it's more of a symbol of...oh, I apologize for rambling. It's a bad habit of mine. Arsé-kun: Angra: Nah, go ahead, dude. I ain't got much to say. Sheepy: Bedi: So it doesn't bore you? Arsé-kun: Angra: Not yet at least! Sheepy: Bedi: It's more of a symbol of those happy times because I was completely incapable of making it on my travels. Arsé-kun: Angra: But you can now? Sheepy: Bedi: I'm capable of making it now, but it's the only thing that truly remains from those times. Sheepy: Bedi: Do you ever wish things were just a bit different? Almost as though you could erase memories of the past that changed you? Arsé-kun: Angra: Fuck, man. I'd be some random schmuck otherwise. And some third schmuck would be stuck with what I had.. Feels bad. Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose. Sheepy: Bedi: I understand those memories are important, yet...I... Arsé-kun: Angra: Eh! Shit happens, it makes the world turn. That and black magic, but anyway. And then you die. Sheepy: Bedi:..I recognize we'll never return to those happy times, so we just have to make new ones. But with Sir Lancelot a berserker due to what happened between himself and our King, Sir Gawain completely unrestrained by any moral compass in some respects due to our King not watching over him, and Sir Tristan in...ah, he hasn't changed a bit. Sheepy: Bedi: But it feels like it's impossible. Even if we're happy together, something is missing. Something is wrong. Sheepy: Bedi: And it just weighs on the back of my mind. Arsé-kun: Angra: Get over it, that's my advice. You're not gettin' it back. Never will. Why bother? Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, that's true. Sheepy: Bedi: But... Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose why I bother is because I dearly love my friends. I'd like to see them smile again without seeing that guilt behind their eyes. ...Other than Sir Tristan. Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, it's ready. Arsé-kun: Angra: Well, tell them to stop bein' pussies. Except the Berserker, I guess, he'll kill me. Sheepy: *Bedi dishes out the steamed veggies and gives them to Angra* Sheepy: Bedi:...Hmm... Tell them to... Sheepy: Bedi:..would that work... Sheepy: Bedi: ...Thank you... Sheepy: Bedi: You've actually helped me a lot. Arsé-kun: Angra: Yeah, sure, any time. And you helped more. Sheepy: Bedi: I'm happy to hear that. Arsé-kun: *Angra considers the veggies. He considers the coconuts, and it's trees. It's still hot. He likes his tongue not burning to a cinder.* Sheepy: Bedi: If you like it, I'll make it for you in the future. If not, I'll try to come up with something else. Sheepy: Bedi: My brother is a much better cook than me. Sheepy: Bedi: However...I'll do my best! Arsé-kun: Angra: It's not pitch black, yer already better than half the shit I've seen. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, that sounds accurate. Arsé-kun: *Angra goes to nom. !!! It is immediately Angra-Approved.* Sheepy: Bedi: Oh...! I'll keep in mind that you like it! Arsé-kun: *Angra proceeds to more or less inhale the edibles. is gud* Sheepy: *Bedi finishes cleaning* Arsé-kun: *Until Angra comes over with his plate and utensils. You are not done.* Sheepy: *Bedi begins cleaning those, too* Arsé-kun: *Good man Bedivere LastName* Arsé-kun: Angra: So, uh... Now what? Arsé-kun: Angra: I'd love to fuck with somebody, but I'll die instantly. Sheepy: Bedi: Hmm.. Sheepy: Bedi: Do you want to try going back to sleep? Arsé-kun: Angra: Should, but I'm not feeling it. Sheepy: Bedi: Hmm... Sheepy: Bedi: I was considering it myself because...what if Merlin gets lonely? Arsé-kun: Angra: Then sucks to be him. Arsé-kun: Angra: Oh, oh, I know. I can be a creepy weirdo and you can see if everyone's doing okay. It's Halloween, after all! Nobody is safe! Sheepy: Bedi: Oh...! Sheepy: Bedi: But wouldn't that wake them up? Arsé-kun: Angra: What are you gonna do, jump on their bed until it breaks? Why would it? Sheepy: Bedi: Jump on their bed...? Arsé-kun: Angra: You're not, right? So why would you wake anyone up? It's bitch o clock am. Sheepy: Bedi: I've only heard of such activities in rumors...! Sheepy: Bedi: That children jump on their beds and get punished. Arsé-kun: Angra: Well, yeah. They would go flyin' out windows, or hit the floor, or do somethin' stupid. We're adults, we can do what we goddamn want. Sheepy: Bedi: ....However, when I asked if Satoru partakes in such activities....he replied, "Why? What does it accomplish?" Arsé-kun: Angra: The same as other time wasters! It's fun! Sheepy: Bedi: They meant not actual children, but manchildren! Sheepy: Bedi: You're very knowledgeable! Arsé-kun: Angra: Real kids? Shouldn't do it. They'll gottdam die. And are you calling me a manchildren?? Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Sheepy: Bedi: *he tilts his head* Huh? Arsé-kun: Angra: *he tilts his in response* Huh? Do we think better when we tilt? Sheepy: Bedi: Well, I thought you were like Andersen. Sheepy: Bedi: You gave me "old man in a child's body" vibes, but not the way Satoru does. Arsé-kun: Angra: I mean, I was pretty old when I finally died! Does that count? Sheepy: Bedi: Oh! So was... Sheepy: Bedi:....I? Sheepy: Bedi:...... Sheepy: Bedi:.....??? Arsé-kun: Angra: Should I be calling you old man, then?? Sheepy: Bedi: I didn't actually die....I kind of was just ...sent to the void? Arsé-kun: Angra: I'd say lucky you, but can't share the feeling! Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, it's quite unnatural. Sheepy: Bedi: I wouldn't expect anyone to relate. Arsé-kun: Angra: That's why yer lucky, but whatever. Sheepy: Bedi: Oh. Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose I might be lucky in some people's eyes in that respect. Arsé-kun: Angra: *he sorta shrugs* Sheepy: Bedi: Anyway...um... Sheepy: Bedi: What now? Arsé-kun: Angra: I dunno. What do you fancy pantsy knights do, anyway? Sheepy: Bedi: Whatever my king asks of me. Sheepy: Bedi: Other than that... Sheepy: Bedi: We spend time together, train ourselves, spar, or do what we need in order to live. Sheepy: Bedi: A bond between your fellow knights is incredibly important. Sheepy: Bedi: It'll be what saves you. Sheepy: Bedi: We also sightsee...but if you mean now... Sheepy: Bedi:...Unfortunately, I think Sir Lancelot and Sir Tristan mope all the time with very few breaks, Sir Gawain is a skirt chaser, and I spend most of my time by Merlin's side. Arsé-kun: Angra: Yeah, I noticed. It's a good source of food for me. Sheepy: Bedi: Lucan hasn't changed a bit other than the massive hole in his chest, Sir Kay hasn't changed, and Griflet apparently enjoys children's shows. Sheepy: Bedi: I would be overjoyed if all of us could come together for a party of some sort. Arsé-kun: Angra: Then have a party! Go nuts, go feral, get smashed and get "smashed"! Arsé-kun: Angra: You wanna do a thing? Do the thing! Sheepy: Bedi: *he eagerly holds his fists up in front of his chest, smiling brightly* I'll "go feral"! Arsé-kun: Angra: Wait wait wait hold on wait *this is not the reply he expected At All* Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Arsé-kun: *And poor Angra now has to explain EXACTLY what "Going feral" means. He throws Sicko Mode in for a bonus* Sheepy: Bedi:....I don't really understand, so I'll just ask Merlin Arsé-kun: Angra: Oh my gggghh.. It means you act like a nutcase wild animal! Go nuts! Go crazy! Same thing! Please don't actually use it, I might be murdered for it! Sheepy: Bedi: Oh... Sheepy: Bedi: I'll avoid it. Arsé-kun: Angra: Lobo going on a murder spree is going feral. Me drinking a keg of beer and committing a crime is going feral. You're a goodie two shoes, you avoid that. Sheepy: Bedi: I see. Sheepy: Bedi: But... Sheepy: Bedi: Isn't it "Goodie two snooze"? Sheepy: Bedi: Lucan says that a goodie two snooze is someone who's good at droning on to the point that you get in two naps before they're done. Sheepy: Bedi: And that any similar phrases are wrong and I should question them. Arsé-kun: Angra: Eh? A liar? Lemme beat him up and die for my transgressions. Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Arsé-kun: Angra: Never mind! *he decides to do it himself later this week.* Sheepy: Bedi: My brother's very smart. Arsé-kun: Angra: Yeah, in the bad ideas and puns department. Sheepy: Bedi: For example.. Sheepy: Bedi: Did you know that alcohol was invented by someone named Alfred Kay Hole? But his friends would call him Al for short. Sheepy: Bedi: He told me that. Arsé-kun: Angra: Did he? Hmm! Sheepy: Bedi: I hadn't heard it before. He's very knowledgeable! Arsé-kun: Angra: He must be, to know such weird stuff. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, exactly Sheepy: Bedi: He loves teaching me these things, too. Sheepy: Bedi: And spreading the word. He tells me to share my newfound knowledge whenever I can. Arsé-kun: Angra: Maaan.. *does he tell Bedi? Does he not? Which is the more evil of the two? And which keeps him fed?* ... Arsé-kun: Angra: You know he's fuckin' with you, right? Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, people tell me this often. Arsé-kun: Angra: Al Kay Hole? Alcohol? He's messing with you. Sheepy: Bedi: But Lucan doesn't lie. Arsé-kun: Angra: Also, it's goodie two-shoes. But I might steal the other one! Sheepy: Bedi: He says that he knows a lot of facts about make up, not that they're lies. Sheepy: Bedi:...Or is it a lot of facts that he makes up? Sheepy: Bedi: Either way, he knows a lot of facts! Arsé-kun: Angra: Both? But these sound like bullshit to me, and I know bullshit! I speak it fluently! He's makin' shit up and watchin' you embarrass yourself! What a dickkk! Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Sheepy: Bedi: Hmmmm...but... Sheepy: Bedi: *he tilts his head* ... Arsé-kun: Angra: Whaaaat an asshollle! A whole douché de pas! Arsé-kun: Angra: And the entire asshole ballet! Sheepy: Bedi: So then... Sheepy: Bedi: Eggnog isn't an alcoholic beverage for chickens? Arsé-kun: Angra: Nope! Sheepy: Bedi: And Santa doesn't put people down on his naughty list permanently if they forget to bake cookies for him? Arsé-kun: Angra: Nooope! The Krampus might consider it though! Sheepy: Bedi: Lucan said he was giving his gifts to me because he felt bad for me and was taking the coal... Sheepy: Bedi: He even put my name on in advance... Arsé-kun: Angra: ... IS regifting a sin? *thinking emoji* Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Arsé-kun: Angra: The answer issss! Ittttttt's not! Sheepy: Bedi:....!? Sheepy: Bedi: And the Easter bunny doesn't eat people whose hair makes people think of bunnies!? Arsé-kun: Angra: It's a rabbit! Why would he eat people? He's not the beast! Sheepy: Bedi:...Because he's hungry after laying eggs. Sheepy: Bedi: But he eats other rabbits for fuel. Sheepy: Bedi: His vision isn't very good so he mistakes people with hairstyles like mine for rabbits. Arsé-kun: Angra: That's the dumbest thing I've heard tonight! I love it. I'm going to scare children with it next year. Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Arsé-kun: Angra: That's dumb. Hi, I'm your villain for the evening and you're kinda naive, ain'tcha? Arsé-kun: Angra: A bit dumb in the upstairs? A little too trusting of man? Like okay, Spenta, we get it, you're the nicest guy in the world, but yer kind of an idiot? Arsé-kun: Angra: You a doormat or a man? Ch-ch-check yaself 'fore ya wreck yaself! Arsé-kun: *Angra attempts an airhorn noise, but not too loudly. bewww bewbewbewbewwww* Arsé-kun: Angra: Anyway if you hold him down, I'll kick him in the taint for ya. Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Sheepy: Bedi: Isn't it better to be trusting than to constantly question whether something is a lie? Sheepy: Bedi: My brother wouldn't have any reason to lie to me, would he? Sheepy: Bedi: And....a doormat, hm. Sheepy: Bedi: I wonder if I am one....I wonder... I'll ask Merlin about what you're saying. Arsé-kun: Angra: Easy answer. For his own amusement! People can be diiiiicks! Sheepy: Bedi:?! Sheepy: Bedi: Wh...what!? Arsé-kun: Angra: Surprise! Sheepy: Bedi: But...! Sheepy: Bedi: I can't believe this... Sheepy: Bedi:....I need to ask Merlin about this... Arsé-kun: Angra: Yeaaah, probs a good idea. Believin' the shit I say might not always be good! Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose so. Sheepy: Bedi: I have a lot to think about... (CONTINUED IN 15.5)

#fate goes au #badlydrawnstuph #14

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bad-draft-stuff · 5 years

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Fate Goes (and has a bad evening)

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*OKAY ITS BEEN LIKE SEVERAL MONTHS SINCE THIS DRAFT HAS BEEN OPENED SO WE’RE JUST GONNA.. MOVE ON* Sheepy: Bedi: *he’s preparing the outside of the house for Halloween. it’s important to be festive!* Sheepy: Bedi: I didn’t think we should present our home as scary, so I went with this cute ornament I found in the store instead. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Cute, yeah. If you cover up the entire face, I could agree it’s cute! Sheepy: Bedi: What do you mean? Sheepy: Bedi: I thought its face was cute… Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, do you have a costume yet? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Of course not! Sheepy: Bedi: I don’t either. I forgot about it. Sheepy: Bedi: Do you have any ideas? Arsé-kun: Merlin: … Oh, I’ve got one! Sheepy: Bedi: What is it? Arsé-kun: Merlin: You be me, I’ll be you! Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, good idea! Arsé-kun: Merlin: It can’t be that hard, can it?? Sheepy: Bedi: It shouldn’t be too difficult. Sheepy: Bedi: It doesn’t have to be perfect, after all! Arsé-kun: Merlin: And that just makes it easier on us! Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, and we could make it easier by swapping clothing. Arsé-kun: Merlin: That’s what I was thinking! Sheepy: Bedi: Perfect. Arsé-kun: Merlin: And we can wait until the last minute to prepare. So lets get back to this. *he picks up and plants a scarecrow with decent force.* Sheepy: Bedi: *he turns his attention to the last thing he put up and begins straightening it* Sheepy: *Lobo is watching them from the window* Sheepy: Bedi:… *he looks up at the window* Oh, that reminds me. We’ll need to get Lobo not to tear it up. Sheepy: Bedi: And we’ll need to get Rider not to decapitate anything…huh. They’re already kind of Halloween themed. Dr. Griffin, too. Arsé-kun: Merlin: They really are, huh? Lucky them. Sheepy: Bedi: But during Christmas…or Easter… Arsé-kun: Merlin: That’s when it sucks to be them! Sheepy: Bedi: Or during Updog day. Lucan told me about it, but not details. Sheepy: Bedi: However, I’m sure it’s incredibly important. Arsé-kun: Merlin: … … What’s updog? Sheepy: Bedi: I don’t know, unfortunately. Sheepy: Bedi: So you haven’t heard of it, either? Arsé-kun: Merlin: *he sighs and stops adjusting a fake tombstone* It’s bait to get someone to ask what Updog is! Sheepy: Bedi:…But why? Arsé-kun: Merlin: “What’s up, dog”, followed by “Not much dog, what’s up with you!” Sheepy: Bedi: *he looks completely lost, but his smile is still present* Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, so you’re meant to say it to a dog? Arsé-kun: Merlin: “Dog” can be slang for “dude” or “bro”. *his airquotes are spot on* Sheepy: Bedi: I see. Arsé-kun: Merlin: It’s.. It’s a kid friendly variation on sugma. Sheepy: Bedi: Ah… Sheepy: Bedi:…. Sheepy: Bedi: Like the fire slug in the game Kintoki was playing. Arsé-kun: Merlin: …? Arsé-kun: Merlin: I guess?? Sheepy: Bedi: That’s its name. Arsé-kun: Merlin: We’ll just have to ask, huh? Sheepy: Bedi: Ask whom? Kintoki? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yeah. Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, I suppose. Arsé-kun: Angra: *he strolls outside, his goal being to ruin the nice pile of leaves* Just google it, you old tart! Sheepy: Bedi:….? Sheepy: Bedi: *he tilts his head* “Google”… Arsé-kun: Merlin: *he promptly pulls his phone out to google it* Oh, it’s Slugma. Was close, though. Sheepy: Bedi: I’m afraid I can’t “google” anything. I’m not aware of such a verb. Sheepy: Bedi: I apologize. Arsé-kun: Angra: *he stops and squints so hard his eyes are slivers* You not use the internet or something? You an old retired man? Sheepy: Bedi: Once again, I’m not familiar with such things. Arsé-kun: Angra: Your fuckbuddy does streams and you don’t know shit? Sheepy: Bedi: Ah! That’s magic! *he’s beaming* Isn’t he amazing!? Arsé-kun: Angra: Sweet merciful zoroastrian feast of fucks. *he puts his hands on his face. his face is gone. incredible void boy tricks* It’s all wires and signals. Edison n’ Tesla would shit themselves over it. Sheepy: Bedi: I’m afraid…I do not follow your explanation. Arsé-kun: Angra: Wizrad, I am stealing your idiot! I’m teaching him how to use the internet! Arsé-kun: Merlin: Have fun! Sheepy: Bedi: I don’t understand. Arsé-kun: Angra: You’re about to! *he grabs onto the Airgetlam and very, very quickly regrets his decisions. But he sticks to it!* Sheepy: *Airgetlam glows upon being touched.* Sheepy: Bedi: I…I see. *he doesn’t appear to notice it at all.* Arsé-kun: Angra: C'mon, we’re goin’ in! Gonna show you how to look up shit and cool swords, or whatever you knights like! Arsé-kun: *Angra goes to drag Bedi inside. Airgetlam is in no danger of being torn off on accident- Angra’s not strong enough to do that, even if he wanted to.* Sheepy: *bedi follows, confused still* Sheepy: Bedi: Why? Arsé-kun: *Angra grabs a nearby laptop and opens it up. It ain’t his.* Arsé-kun: Angra: Because the world runs on this shit, kid. Sheepy: Bedi:….! Sheepy: Bedi: Internet is sunlight. Arsé-kun: Angra: It’s closer to lightning, I think! Arsé-kun: Angra: Chaldea? Internet. Phones? Some net. Streams? Net. Electricity is wild. Sheepy: Bedi: Net? Sheepy: Bedi: Like fishing net. Arsé-kun: Angra: Internet. I ain’t sayin’ it every single time. Sheepy: Bedi: So Chaldea is internet. Arsé-kun: Angra: It sure has a lot of it! Okay, here. *he pulls up the equivalent of google that’s used these days.* What do ya wanna look up? Anythin’. Sheepy: Bedi: *he looks up* Arsé-kun: Angra: … … On the internet, you literal turd. Sheepy: Bedi: Like in tomes. Arsé-kun: Angra: Yes! Sheepy: Bedi: I don’t know. Sheepy: Bedi: Perhaps on wolves to figure out how to prevent them from tearing up your decorations… Arsé-kun: Angra: *he looks up “Stopping dogs from ruining decorations”, and in a second tab looks up “How to google on the internet”, before passing the laptop off to Bedi* Go fucking nuts, go feral, go play. Sheepy: Bedi: What? Arsé-kun: Angra: Oh, man. *he very slowly opens the first link for the first search, so Bedi can watch* Like that. Arsé-kun: Angra: You can read, yeah? You’re not dumb? Sheepy: Bedi: I can read. Arsé-kun: Angra: Then get readin’! Searching stuff is just a book on a screen. Sheepy: Bedi:…I, um.. Sheepy: Bedi: I still don’t understand why. Arsé-kun: Angra: Because the net’s got everythin’! It’s got all the books! All of ‘em! Shit’s wild. Arsé-kun: Angra: And everybody these days relies on it more than their legs half the time! Not literally! Sheepy: Bedi: Really? So it’s a library? Arsé-kun: Angra: A big wired library! Sheepy: Bedi: I see! Sheepy: Bedi: I’d like to visit this library one day!! Arsé-kun: *Angra leans over to bring up a third search. “What is the internet and how do I use it?” It has video results! Bedi (probably) knows what videos are! I hope??* Arsé-kun: *Bedi will now be inconvenienced by The World’s Evil, for at least an hour. Or that’s what Angra’s gonna say about it. He’s just as interested in how it actually works.* Sheepy: *Bedi seems to be getting more and more anxious as time passes.* Arsé-kun: *Sucks to be you, Angra thinks!* Sheepy: Bedi: Well, it’s just… Arsé-kun: Angra: A gigantic waste of time? Sheepy: Bedi: I left in the middle of helping Merlin. Sheepy: Bedi: Y…no. Arsé-kun: Angra: Yes? Great! I’ve taught a thing and ruined your afternoon! *yesssss!* Sheepy: Bedi: I do appreciate what you’ve told me… Sheepy: Tristan: How sad, how sad. Arsé-kun: Angra: What’s depressin’ you this week, sad man? Sheepy: Tristan: The day of Halloween is on the horizon, and yet, I have not even begun to set sail. Sheepy: Tristan: *he strums his harp* It occurred to me that it wouldn’t matter, because even if I were to dress up as something else, it would never change how despicable a man I am. Sheepy: Tristan: How sad, how sad. Arsé-kun: Angra: Aww, cute! If the sum of evil can do it, what’s stoppin’ you, pumpkin? *he is absolutely teasing Tristan. At least he’s not being snappy about it* Sheepy: Tristan: Ah, to be a Knight of the Round Table, filled wih confidence of tomorrow. Ah, to be the evil of the world, fearless, uncaring of how others may judge him. Arsé-kun: Angra: Here’s this villain’s advice! Just put on cat ears and you’re done. Sheepy: Tristan: And yet, I quiver before this decision of mine, incapable of escaping from the standstill I have put myself in. Arsé-kun: Angra: … *he googles “Lazy halloween costumes”* Sheepy: Tristan: I wouldn’t be a very beautiful cat in my current state. Sheepy: Tristan: Ah, I can only be a thing of beauty, for I am a thing of beauty. Sheepy: Tristan: So a cat would be out of the picture, since I’m lacking in four legs and a tail. Sheepy: Tristan: Those, and their ears, are what make them beautiful. So, you see, I could never capture that. Sheepy: Tristan: How sad, how sad. Sheepy: Tristan: Sometimes I’m so beautiful it troubles even myself. Arsé-kun: Angra: *he’s run out of responses. completely out.* Sheepy: Bedi: I… Sheepy: Bedi: Y…yes. Sheepy: Tristan: Do you ever feel this way? Arsé-kun: Angra: What, sad? Sure. Sheepy: Tristan: No, no. Sheepy: Tristan: Troubled by your own beauty. Sheepy: Tristan: Ah, I feel a need to always live up to it. Arsé-kun: Angra: As you can see, I’m a black hole! Can’t relate! I’m not pretty! Sheepy: Tristan: Perhaps you are but you haven’t discovered it yet. Arsé-kun: Angra: I’d say “Hell yeah internal beauty” but man I am one, UGLY, motherfucker. Sheepy: Tristan: Internal beauty is something you’re capable of fixing. Sheepy: Tristan: It just requires bravery I do not have. Sheepy: Bedi: I’d recommend a varied and healthy diet. Arsé-kun: Angra: Have you tried eating scorpion yet? Sheepy: Bedi: Oh! I have. Arsé-kun: Angra: Good shit. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes. Sheepy: Bedi: I wouldn’t word it that way myself, but… Sheepy: Bedi: I agree with the feelings behind that. Arsé-kun: Angra: Don’t eat shit, either, kids, you WILL die. Sheepy: Bedi: I didn’t brave such things… Sheepy: Tristan: Hmm? Sheepy: Tristan: But you eat honey. Arsé-kun: Angra: You tellin’ me that’s bee shit? Sheepy: Bedi:…I don’t think honey is bee poop. Arsé-kun: Angra: *New search! What is Honey, actually?* … … Honey is bee vomit. I hate this information! You can have it! Sheepy: Bedi:.. Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, that doesn’t surprise me. Arsé-kun: Angra: That’s not the reply I was looking for! I love it. Sheepy: Bedi: I suspected bees had a deep, dark secret. Sheepy: Bedi: It’s a lot less dark than I expected. Arsé-kun: Angra: Like how the Queen can’t fly and get her fat little body off the ground because she’s terminally fucking bees? Sheepy: Bedi: Or how all female bees are capable of producing eggs, but the queen will eat their eggs. Arsé-kun: Angra: Nice. Sheepy: Bedi: If the queen doesn’t respond in time, the female bees will kill her and lay more eggs, but… Arsé-kun: Merlin: ._. Sheepy: Bedi: They don’t hatch into anything from what I recall, so the hive ends up…ah, Merlin. I apologize. …I got distracted and didn’t help you. Arsé-kun: Merlin: It’s cool, Bedi, got Lance to take over. Sheepy: Bedi: I’m happy to hear that. Sheepy: Tristan: Merlin. Arsé-kun: Merlin: What’s up, Tristan? Sheepy: Tristan: I’ve come across a standstill. How sad. Sheepy: Tristan: I’m too beautiful for any costumes, so I fear diminishing my appearance with them. Sheepy: Tristan:…But I want to join in on the festivities. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Be yourself but hotter. Sheepy: Tristan:….! Sheepy: Tristan: Ah, I knew I could count on you. Sheepy: Tristan: I’ll be myself, but with an open jacket. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Wait, I’ve got more. Dress up as a different class, but you’re still fantastic you. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yes, you understand! Sheepy: Tristan: Hmm? Sheepy: Tristan: Another class.. Sheepy: Tristan:…Yes, I’ll be… Sheepy: Tristan: *he poses* Studmuffin class. Arsé-kun: Merlin: New exclusive class! One member only! Sheepy: Bedi:…I don’t remember hearing about that class before. Arsé-kun: *angra makes a sound akin to a verbal keysmash* Arsé-kun: Merlin: It exists now because we’ve said so. Sheepy: Tristan: You can join too, Merlin. I’m sure you qualify for it. Ah, Sir Bedivere, too. Sheepy: Tristan: We’ll be the Three Studkateers. Arsé-kun: *mozart breaks into uncontrollable laughter several rooms away. i wonder why* Sheepy: Bedi: I feel like I’ve been dragged into something that I’ll quickly come to regret. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Love to join you, but I’m being Bedi this year. Sheepy: Tristan: The Three Studkateers disband before they even can make group jackets… Sheepy: Tristan: How sad, how sad! Sheepy: Tristan: Ah, I truly am alone on this mission! Arsé-kun: Angra: I’ll volunteer with my inner beauty to keep you company! Sheepy: Tristan: We’ll be Beauty and the Beast. Sheepy: Tristan: Of course, I take the first role. Arsé-kun: Angra: Better than what I had planned! I’ll take Beast! Sheepy: Bedi: I…I’m glad it all worked out in the end. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Yeah, me too. Sheepy: Bedi: But how did things go with Lobo? Arsé-kun: Merlin: Haven’t seen him yet, but I get the feeling he’s up to something. Sheepy: Bedi: Oh dear… Sheepy: Bedi: *he raises his voice* Lobo! Sheepy: *Lobo walks in with a pumpkin in his mouth* Arsé-kun: Angra: You got it! You’ve got a pumpkin! Sheepy: Lobo: *He’s wagging his tail* Sheepy: Bedi: Lobo, don’t eat the ornaments, okay? Sheepy: Lobo: *he glares viciously at Bedi* Arsé-kun: Merlin: I don’t think that needs a translation! Sheepy: Bedi: I’ll give you any other food you want if you don’t eat the ornaments. Sheepy: Lobo:……! Sheepy: Lobo: *he snorts* (Chocolate.) Arsé-kun: Angra: Why, so you eat grass all day tomorrow? Sheepy: Lobo:? Arsé-kun: Angra: Eh, okay! *he hops up to get Lobo some sweets. there is a 50% chance Minako will destroy him during the journey.* Sheepy: Bedi: Where are you going? Arsé-kun: Angra: Gettin’ Lobo what he wants. I like keeping my limbs intact! Sheepy: Lobo: *he follows Angra, the pumpkin still in his mouth* Sheepy: Bedi: I…see. Sheepy: Bedi: Is he really that mad…? He seems happy with the pumpkin. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I’m surprised he isn’t risking it to tease Lobo. Sheepy: Bedi: Me too. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Even the world’s evil is capable of improving.. Arsé-kun: Merlin: That’s something to think about. Arsé-kun: *Other current events include! Mephisto, Jekyll, and Jack turning Mink’s living room into an impromptu lab (mostly by Mephisto’s Terr. Creation), uhhhh, Lance slowly setting up the outside (He’s very unsure, and has invited Herc to help), Proto going on some sort of spy mission, and uhhhhhh whatever else we can think of.* Sheepy: Tristan: How sad, how sad! Sheepy: Tristan: Even the world’s evil is capable of improvement, and yet I… Sheepy: *Rider is watching Lancelot and Herc, Holmes has joined in on the science club* Sheepy: Tristan: Ah…if only I were capable of it. But instead…my inability to improve… Sheepy: Tristan: Stems from the coldest depths of my soul. Sheepy: Tristan: How sad, how sad! Sheepy: Bedi: I know how to improve at anything, Sir Tristan. If you recognize your flaws and address them, you’ll improve. Sheepy: Tristan: Ah…My friend is such a genius! Truly, I’m lucky to have such fri….-!!! Sheepy: Tristan: Th…that’s it! Sheepy: Tristan: What a lucky man I am! How joyful! Arsé-kun: Merlin: You do have friends. You seem to doubt that often. Sheepy: Tristan: Ah…but my realization… Sheepy: Tristan: Friends can help me improve as a person. Arsé-kun: Merlin: They absolutely can! Arsé-kun: Jekyll, distantly: Please don’t imbibe the chemicals!!! Sheepy: Izou: I’m dumb and don’t know what those words mean! Sheepy: Izou: It ticks me off! Sheepy: Izou: It makes me want to drink this weird lookin’ alcohol even more! Arsé-kun: Jekyll: Please do not drink the chemicals. It is not alcohol. You won’t get drunk. Sheepy: Izou: Then what’s the point!? Sheepy: Izou: You smart people are all bland! Arsé-kun: Jekyll: … *he holds his phone up to his ear for a moment or so* .. I’ve been corrected. I’m told to inform you that drinking this will make you dead and stupid. In that order. Sheepy: Izou: I’m already both! Sheepy: Izou: Err….wait! Sheepy: Izou: I’m not that - Sheepy: Izou: …… Sheepy: Izou: Is it………..first…or second…–I don’t care! I ain’t dead, you smart person! Arsé-kun: Mephisto: You will be once I bomb you to smithereens! *:D* Or the invisible guy can get you, whichever comes first! *he gestures to Jack holding up a visible t-shirt. floating t-shirt. scary.* Sheepy: Izou: stop making up big words! I don’t understand them! Are you doing it to make fun of me!? Arsé-kun: Mephisto: You, bomb, explode, die! *this is amusing him far more than it should* Sheepy: Izou: *he huffs* I won’t let you if you try! *he puts down the chemical* Sheepy: Izou: Why are you smiling like that!? Are you laughing at me!? Ahhh, you make me so mad! I hate that face of yours! Arsé-kun: Mephisto: Thanks! Sheepy: Izou: ? Sheepy: Izou: Thanks? Sheepy: Izou: What did I do? Nothing for you! Why are you thanking me!? Arsé-kun: Mephisto: Because! *he puts his own chemicals down and caps them. safety first* You’re not supposed to like this demon! You can try to punch me after we wrap this up, okay? Arsé-kun rolled a die with 20 sides. The die showed: 2 Arsé-kun: *The t-shirt is put down. Someone’s approaching you, Izou, but you don’t see shiiiit. Sure hear it though.* Sheepy: Izou: …….Who’s there!? Arsé-kun: Jack: The Invisible Man. You look like you were hit by a damn dump truck and smell like it too. Was that your intention? Sheepy: Izou: Oi! I don’t look like- whatever you just said! Sheepy: Izou: I’m not lookin’ to impress anyone! One minute I was eatin’ out of that little kid’s trash, and then the next I ended up in here! Arsé-kun: Mephisto: That explains a lot! Sheepy: Izou: I was gonna try to abduct him for ransom money, but I didn’t understand what that meant for what I had to do, so I left it up to the kid. Arsé-kun: Jack: Had you harmed him, you’d have ceased to live. *he goes to pat Izou, and leaves a very clear handprint. Jack’s hand is now stained with filth. dis gus tang* Sheepy: Izou: ’s that a threat? Is abductin’ him harm? Sheepy: Izou: I’ve only seen it on TV. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: This was a better outcome. *he watches as Jack tries to wipe off the filth and just spreads it across himself. Well, now theres some floating dirt smears* Sheepy: Izou: What? Sheepy: Izou: Oi, th’ best outcome would’ve been getting gambling money. Sheepy: Izou: I’m dumb and never won, not even once! Sheepy: Izou: But it’s so much fun! Arsé-kun: Jekyll: There are people to gamble with here. You might even win once or twice. Sheepy: Izou: Oh, I want to gamble! And get drunk! Arsé-kun: Jekyll: I can confirm the presence of booze. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: … Hyde adds that it is “the good shit”. Sheepy: Izou: ! Sheepy: Izou: Gimme, gimme! Arsé-kun: Mephisto: Lab adjourned! We’ll resume after the holiday! *he picks up Jack’s t-shirt and the lab just vanishes. Normal living room resumes it’s existence.* Go raid a kitchen, but don’t say we sent you~ Sheepy: Izou: Great! Sheepy: Lobo: *he’s sniffing at Jack* Arsé-kun: Jack: *he pats Lobo’s nose with his less dirty hand* Do I smell like Shinjuku yet, Lobo? Sheepy: Lobo: *he tilts his head before licking Jack* Sheepy: Izou: !! It’s big! ‘nd fluffy! Arsé-kun: Jekyll: This is Lobo. He might decide you’re a toy, so be careful. Arsé-kun: Hyde: Or dinner! Arsé-kun: *Jekyll quickly pats his hair back down. Down, Hyde. Bad. Bad alter-ego.* Sheepy: Lobo: *he looks over at Jekyll before sniffing at Izou* Sheepy: Izou: I’m no toy, nor am I dinner! Sheepy: Lobo: *he bites down on a loose piece of Izou’s clothing and starts chewing on it, but Izou is too busy looking smug at Jekyll to notice.* Sheepy: Izou: Fuhahahaha! I’m a scary manslayer! I won’t let anyone laugh at me, or I’ll cut them down! Especially smart people! Sheepy: Izou: And so that means I’m no one’s toy nor dinner! Sheepy: Lobo: *chew, chew* Arsé-kun: Jack: Your scarf sure is. I’m going to clean this grime off. Excuse me, shitheads. *the walking dirt exits scene* Sheepy: Izou:…! Sheepy: Izou: Heyhey, that’s not food. I’ve already tried eating it. Arsé-kun: Angra: Whatt’re we doin’, pup? *he goes to write “KICK ME” on Izou’s scarf* Sheepy: Lobo: *he tilts his head* Arsé-kun: Angra: Daaaaaamn, you’re so dirty it’s staining pure evil! *his hand is also now stained with gray grime. it doesn’t look black on him* Impressive! Sheepy: Izou: Eh? Arsé-kun: Angra: Hi, I’m the villain of the house! Can I inconvenience you? Great! Sheepy: Izou: What? Arsé-kun: Angra: I’m stealing you! I’d hold you for ransom but I’d get a dirty sock and ten qp~ Sheepy: Izou: Where are we goin’ Sheepy: Lobo: *he has his mouth open, ready to chew on Izou more* Arsé-kun: Angra: We’re goin’ up! If we look half decent, we can steal as much as we want from the kitch’ and no one can stop us! Sheepy: Izou:…! Sheepy: Izou: Where’re we goin’!? Arsé-kun: Angra: Up a floor! Not far! Sheepy: Lobo: *chew chew chew* Arsé-kun: *Mephisto has opted out of this encounter. Goodbye Moose* Sheepy: Izou: Right, I’ll follow you. Arsé-kun: *Vlad is currently at the kitchen table, keeping Satoru company. He watches as Angra and Izou pass by, dragging Lobo along behind them. Bc he’s still chewing on the scarf. Vlad is unfazed by all this. The only thing he IS fazed by is the smell. Yuck.* Sheepy: Satoru: That’s him. Sheepy: Satoru: He seems nice enough. Arsé-kun: Vlad: I see… Did you need yet another dog? Sheepy: Satoru: Dog? Where? Arsé-kun: Vlad: Something about his appearance reminds me of a scruffy street terrier. Sheepy: Satoru: Oh. He reminds me of a rat. Arsé-kun: Vlad: I see that as well, but I quite like rats. Sheepy: Satoru: He asked me to help him kidnap me for ransom money but I said I had to ask you first. Arsé-kun: Vlad: He would have instead gotten my fist as payment, and his blood on the floor as interest. Sheepy: Satoru: That’s a weird form of payment. Sheepy: Satoru: What can be bought with it? Arsé-kun: Vlad: Dying by my hand for such crimes. Sheepy: Satoru: Oh. Sheepy: Satoru: Huh. Sheepy: Satoru:…..But, since he lives here now…who…summoned him? Arsé-kun: Vlad: You will have to ask. I may just impale him on the spot. Sheepy: Satoru: Huh? But… Sheepy: Satoru: He’s my Servant now. Arsé-kun: Vlad: So he is. Sheepy: Satoru: So killing him, um… Arsé-kun: Vlad: Would be a bad idea. Yes, I understand. Sheepy: Satoru: That’s good. Sheepy: Satoru: For now he can just be the weird man who came for dinner and stayed all winter. Sheepy: Satoru: He’s unexpected so I won’t expect anyone to immediately warm up to him. Arsé-kun: Vlad: Yet, it does sound like some already have. Sheepy: Satoru: That’s good. Sheepy: Satoru: Or else…well. Arsé-kun: Mozart: Or well what? What is it, Lassie? Did little Timmy shit in the well? *he continues to think he’s funny. Saku stops and stares at him.* Sheepy: Satoru: Mom won’t let him sit down. Sheepy: Satoru: Guin probably would chase him down, too. Sheepy: Satoru: And he’d probably smell stinky while everyone tries to eat. Like garbage. Arsé-kun: Vlad: Yes, exactly. Sheepy: Satoru: And I doubt anyone would like that. Arsé-kun: Saku: We would not. Sheepy: Satoru: …I didn’t really think that far before inviting him in. Arsé-kun: Vlad: You didn’t. At least you can understand your mistakes. Sheepy: Satoru: If he is a threat in some way, what do w do? Arsé-kun: Vlad: I call first chance at impaling him through the chest with several lances and d- *he has an oven mitt thrown at him. it lands on him and he only stops to glance at Sakura* Yes, yes, I am stopping. Sheepy: Satoru: He already has been stabbed. Arsé-kun: Vlad: There was more, but I seem to not be permitted to continue. Sheepy: Satoru: Oh, okay. Arsé-kun: Mozart: I do hear the shower running upstairs. Maybe someone convinced him to clean up? Sheepy: Satoru: That’s good. Arsé-kun: *a bit later on!* Sheepy: Izou: *He’s come downstairs and……. did he always have purple hair like that, or…* Arsé-kun: Minako: Oh, you’re right. He is fluffy! Sheepy: Satoru: He looks much better now. Arsé-kun rolled a die with 20 sides. The die showed: 7 Arsé-kun: Minako: … Assassin class, I think? He’s hard to pin down. Sheepy: Izou: What? Sheepy: Izou: No. Sheepy: Izou: My class is “Hitokiri”. Arsé-kun: Minako: …? Sheepy: Izou: It’s different. Arsé-kun: *Mori is quietly observing from the side, meanwhile* Sheepy: Izou: Why’s everyone lookin’ at me? Arsé-kun: Mori: You’re far stronger than initially calculated. Sheepy: Izou: Hah! Yeah! Sheepy: Izou: I’m a sword prodigy! Fuhahahahaha! Arsé-kun: Mori: Your strength is very impressive. May I ask how you got strong as a servant? Sheepy: Izou: By being a prodigy! Sheepy: Izou: Also, I found this place! Sheepy: Izou: It had these hands. They dropped this tasty food. Sheepy: Izou: Eventually I got thrown out. Sheepy: Izou: I felt weirdly stronger after that. Sheepy: Izou: Oh, yeah. Sheepy: Izou: This weird guy, too. Sheepy: Izou: He looked rich. Sheepy: Izou: His trash tasted like rich people’s trash, too. Arsé-kun: Mori: … … Can you describe his appearance at all? Sheepy: Izou: Like…a smart guy. Kinda stiff. Uh…. Sheepy: Izou: Very dark hair. Sheepy: Izou: He kinda reminds me of a butler. Arsé-kun: Mozart: Oh, did he speak like.. *ahem* Very properly, yes, but was still able to convey being a pile of- excuse my French- Shit? Sheepy: Izou: Yeah. Sheepy: Izou: I hated how he used big words! It confused me. Arsé-kun: Mori: …. I do hope one of us has reached the same conclusion I have. Sheepy: Holmes: Ah, so his actual Master is… Sheepy: Holmes: Masanori, huh. Arsé-kun: Angra: Butler McBitch! We did it, we solved the mystery. Sheepy: Izou: What? Arsé-kun: Angra: Don’t worry about it! If we see him again, we’ve got free reign to slay the man! Sheepy: Izou: Do I really? Arsé-kun: Angra: *he looks to Satoru* Do we? Sheepy: Satoru: Um, that doesn’t sound like a good idea. Arsé-kun: Angra: Maim? Curse for the rest of his horrible life? Hit him with a car! Sheepy: Satoru: Oh, okay. Arsé-kun: Angra: Hooray! *he is Excited!* Izou-san! Lets get drunk! Sheepy: Izou: What’s goin’ on, anyway? …Well, I want alcohol! Sheepy: Izou: Yeah, let’s get absolutely smashed! Arsé-kun: Angra: Hell yeah! Arsé-kun: Mori: …. Holmes, if I may? How did you reach your conclusion? Sheepy: Holmes: What? I just listened to the explanation. Sheepy: Holmes: But I had suspicions. Arsé-kun: Mori: It’s good to know we were on the same page this time. Sheepy: Holmes: For example… Sheepy: Holmes: He wasn’t allowed at Chaldea’s ember fields, meaning that his Master wasn’t related to Chaldea. Arsé-kun: Mori: And if his Master had perished a more regular way, he would know about it. Sheepy: Holmes: He’s dirty and eating out of the trash, meaning that his Master doesn’t care about his well being. Arsé-kun: Mori: And this matches much of Masanori’s behavior. Sheepy: Holmes: Exactly. Sheepy: Satoru: So is he still Masanori’s servant? Or my own…? Sheepy: Izou: I don’t care about that guy. You have free booze. Arsé-kun: Mori: I would be inclined to say yours. Sheepy: Satoru: Oh, that’s good. Sheepy: Izou: Just don’t betray me. Sheepy: Izou: Or I might want to, uh…is the phrase, “bite the hand that feeds me”? Arsé-kun: Mori: That’s it, and very understandable. But you will not be betrayed to that level. Sheepy: Izou: Good. And don’t give me smelly veggies either. Sheepy: Izou: I hate smelly veggies. Arsé-kun: Mori: That I cannot guarantee. Sheepy: Izou: If you follow all that, I’ll be loyal. Sheepy: Satoru: But what if the stinky veggies are good? Sheepy: Izou:……. Sheepy: Izou: *he crosses his arms and tilts his head* ….. Sheepy: Izou: But they’re stinky. Arsé-kun: Angra: So were you, what’s ya point? Sheepy: Izou:…Okay, fine, I GUESS it’s fine, but I won’t like it! Sheepy: Holmes: You probably know my name. Sheepy: Izou: I don’t. Sheepy: Holmes: Sherlock Holmes. Sheepy: Izou: I don’t. Arsé-kun: Mori: *hes just smirking at Sherlock* Sheepy: Holmes: How… Sheepy: Izou: Okay, old man, you next. Arsé-kun: Mori: You are permitted to call me Moriarty. Sheepy: Izou: Alright. Sheepy: Izou: I’m Okada Izou. Arsé-kun: *Minako’s hand dives into her pocket for a phone or her compact- Whichever comes first. Who is this guy? Let’s find out* Sheepy: Izou: What is that? Arsé-kun: Minako: My phone? You can’t eat it. It isn’t food, no matter how much we wish it was! Sheepy: Izou: Nah, I was thinking it could be a weapon. Wouldn’t be the first time. Sheepy: Izou: I’m that scary! Sheepy: Izou: You see that, right? How scary I am? Sheepy: Satoru: You look like a pomeranian. Arsé-kun: Minako: Oh, you’re right.. Sheepy: Izou: Yeah, that sounds real intimidating! Arsé-kun: Angra: …. ……. *he says nothing.* Sheepy: Izou: Yeah, yeah, I look like a pomeranian! Fuhahahaha! I don’t even know what that is! I love the sound of it! Sheepy: Izou: You really get it! Sheepy: Satoru: You’re fluffy and easily excited like one. Sheepy: Izou:…Wait, what IS a pomeranian!? Arsé-kun: Angra: *he snorts into his booze* Sheepy: Holmes: *he is on google* Okada Izou…huh. Arsé-kun: *Nobody answers the question. But by all the smirks and suppressed laughs, probably not a good thing.* Sheepy: Holmes: *he reads off the brief description on google* Arsé-kun: Mori: Thank you, ace detective, for using your detective skills to open wikipedia. Sheepy: Holmes: Yes, you’re welcome. Sheepy: Izou: Once again, I’m not an assassin. Sheepy: Izou: I’m a manslayer. Sheepy: Yan: *he’s got his feet up on the table while drinking booze* Arsé-kun: Minako: Who let you in? Sheepy: Yan: Myself? Arsé-kun: Minako: Again? Sheepy: Yan: Yeah. Arsé-kun: Minako: You don’t have, like, Chaldea things to do? Sheepy: Yan: Like what? *he takes a sip of the alcohol* Arsé-kun: Minako: Do you just bum around with the doctor’s money? Sheepy: Yan: No. Arsé-kun: Minako: That’s a surprise. Sheepy: Yan: I don’t use her money. Arsé-kun: Minako: Then where do you get any from? Sheepy: Yan: I work? Sheepy: Yan: Old man has paid me before. I won’t disclose any other employers of mine. Sheepy: Yan: I WILL say the detective is paying me for something, though. Arsé-kun: Mink: If it’s drugs, can you tell me so I can punch him? :) Sheepy: Yan: No, no. Sheepy: Yan: I don’t have that sort of stuff anyway. Arsé-kun: Minako: Good! Sheepy: Yan: No, instead- oh, actually, it’s important Old Man hears this anyway. Sheepy: Yan: He’s paying me not to turn into him. Arsé-kun: Mori: Oh, I can understand that. You would give away his mystery far too quickly. *he seems amused* But what if I pay you more? Sheepy: Yan: Hmmm……. Sheepy: Yan: Oh, that’d work. Arsé-kun: Mori: But did he ever say why? Sheepy: Yan: Something along the lines of… Sheepy: Yan: “The thing inside of me could kill each and every person in this household in the blink of an eye if it so pleased. I don’t trust you with that.” Arsé-kun: Mori: You know what? That’s fair. Sheepy: Yan: But I’m pretty trustworthy. Sheepy: Yan: Anyway, that’s a hint, isn’t it? That means it’s not human. Arsé-kun: Mori: It absolutely is not. I can confirm that much myself. Sheepy: Yan: What do you mean? Arsé-kun: Mori: I spoke to him about it myself. Sheepy: Yan: Huh. Arsé-kun: Mori: Well, let’s just agree to try that out nowhere near civilization. But not now. Sheepy: Yan: Yeah, okay. Arsé-kun: Angra: *he looks up. he’s cleaned up at least half the booze by himself. the void can take a lot of it, but he seems absolutely hammered based on being unable to stand up for a solid 20 seconds. Yan’s leg is used for the assist.* Hey. Hey, bruh, you ever realize how fucked up we really are? Sheepy: Yan: What do you mean? Arsé-kun: Angra: We’re all dead already n’ shit! And, and then people, like.. *vague hand gestures* the dead people? Does this shit count as necrophilia? And no matter what we do, we’re still dead, that’s depressing as hell. Sheepy: Yan:….*he takes a rather large sip of his alcohol* Arsé-kun: Angra: I think I jus’ gave myself depression. Sheepy: Yan: Good job. Arsé-kun: Angra: You’ve got like fifteen second opinions, how do I deal with this shit? Sheepy: Yan: What’s that supposed to mean?? Sheepy: *Lobo has his snout in Yan’s chip bag. Yan is too focused on Angra to notice* Arsé-kun: Angra: How do you, like, stop being depressed so the throne doesn’t decide “Ooh that’s canon now!” and force it on you every time you start to sort of exist? Sheepy: Yan: I dunno. Sheepy: *Yan absentmindedly goes to put his hand in the chip bag, only to touch Lobo instead* Sheepy: Yan: My chips are weirdly hairy. Arsé-kun: Angra: That’s a dog. Sheepy: Yan: …! Puppy, no, that’s human food. Sheepy: Lobo: *he looks up at them, the chip bag on his snout. elegant* Arsé-kun: Angra: th’ king of currenpaw, errybody. Sheepy: Yan: I don’t really want it anymore. Arsé-kun: Angra: but dammit, I was hopin’ for any sorta reply so I could complain at you. All like, “What, you have an answer? Who’s you, where’s the real Yan at?” Or somethin’. *he thinks he is funny. funny enough to laugh at. angra.* Sheepy: Yan:…. Arsé-kun: Angra: … What? Sheepy: Yan: Who am I…? Arsé-kun: Mori: All right, that’s quite enough of this. *he interrupts and blocks Angra, who may or may not have gotten smacked with a coffin* You’re Yan Qing, and that isn��t changing. Sheepy: Yan: I…I don’t know…! Sheepy: Yan: If that’s who I am…then why are they always here!? Why do they keep talking to me!? They’re all me, aren’t they? What even am I? Arsé-kun: Mori: A gigantic mess vaguely shaped like a human being, with an appreciation for women. Sheepy: Yan:….!? Sheepy: Lobo: *boof* Sheepy: Yan: Does that mean I’m human…or do I just look it…? Arsé-kun: Mori: You’re more human than any present Avengers. Sheepy: Yan:….Ah….you’re right. Arsé-kun: Mori: *he covers his mouth with one hand, slightly muffling his own voice* Earth to Assassin, are you still in there? Hello, hello? *he reaches up with his free hand to… ruffle Yan’s hair. aw.* We are departing planet Meltdown for a return trip to Earth. Can you read, over? Sheepy: Yan:…? Sheepy: Yan: Wh…what…? Arsé-kun: Mori: Welcome back to Earth, Assassin. *he makes a radio static sound. krshhh* You were going straight for an endless loop of existential crisis. Sheepy: Yan: I…I’m sorry, I’m feeling better. Sheepy: Lobo: *he tilts his head. where did that noise come from* Arsé-kun: Mori: Don’t apologize. *krshh* What outlaw apologizes for a minor inconvenience? *he finally uncovers his mouth. he does not, however, take his coffin off of Angra, who tried to move it at some point and it is now on top of him. He deserved it.* Sheepy: Lobo: *he tilts his head the other way* Sheepy: Yan: Thank you. Arsé-kun: Mori: Of course. Just don’t make a deal of it. Reputation, you understand. Sheepy: Yan: Yes, I do. Arsé-kun: Mori: Then consider this moment of weakness ignored and discarded in exchange. Sheepy: Yan: Thank you. Sheepy: Yan: Puppy, you won’t tell anyone, right? Arsé-kun: Mori: *he cups his hands over his mouth again to Krshh at Lobo. extreme teasing* Sheepy: Lobo: ????? Sheepy: Lobo: *he slowly lifts up a paw before … slapping it over Yan’s mouth* Sheepy: Yan: Puppy, why?! Sheepy: Lobo: ?!?!?! Arsé-kun rolled a die. The die showed: 6 Arsé-kun: Mori: *try not to laugh. succeed. Krshh at Lobo again with eye contact* Sheepy: Lobo: *he sniffs at Mori’s hand. how is he doing this* Arsé-kun: *Mori holds his hands out for Lobo* Sheepy: Lobo: *he sniffs at both. why do they smell like chips* Arsé-kun: Mori: *he swats the chips off of Lobo’s nose* Sheepy: Lobo:….! *what fell, what was that* Sheepy: Yan: *he’s petting Lobo. big. fluffy* Arsé-kun: *Mink has opted to give this episode some space and started messaging Haku. Now she gets an update AND has to stop working for ten seconds. Tepes approves already. Two birds, one Gandr* Sheepy: Haku: [Text: to Mink] What is it? Arsé-kun: Mink: [text: to Haku] Issss it normal for ur Assass to just sorta uh, existential break for a minute? Sheepy: Haku: [Text: to Mink] Yes. Arsé-kun: Mink: [text: to Haku] oh. I thought that was a bad thing. I mean Mori.san dealt with it really fast,? But uh Arsé-kun: Mink: [text: to Haku] I remember the rules! Should I bring him back to you so that doesnt, again? Sheepy: Haku: [Text: to Mink] Yes, it’s a bad thing, and… Sheepy: Haku: [Text: to Mink] Yes, please bring him. Arsé-kun: Mink: [text: to Haku] Ok!! 👌👌👌 I’ll pull him off Lobo and we’ll be there! Sheepy: Haku: [Text: to Mink] Thank You Arsé-kun: Mink: [text: to Haku] You’re welcome, Haku, Miss! Be there soon!! Sheepy: Lobo: *he gently nudges Mori with his snout. he’ll find the source of the noise eventually* Arsé-kun: Mori: Yes? Yes, what is it? Sheepy: Haku: [Text: to Mink] Ok Sheepy: Lobo: *he tilts his head* Arsé-kun: Minako: *she thinks about how she’s going to go about this. What would Mephisto do? … This is a very bad course of thinking and takes a few bad plans to reach a good one that does not require explosives.* Arsé-kun: Mori: *he grins at Lobo and… KRRSSHH!* Sheepy: Lobo:!!! Sheepy: *Lobo sniffs at Mori’s face. where is it coming from* Arsé-kun: *the sound is coming from the Moriarty!* Sheepy: Lobo:…! *he looks excited! How is he doing that!?* Arsé-kun: Minako: Not to interrupt or anything, but hey, Assassin. If I pay, can I borrow you to help me get pizzas? :D c Sheepy: Yan: Mm? Oh, okay. Sheepy: Yan: Okay, Puppy, be good while I’m gone. Don’t eat too much out of the garbage. Sheepy: Lobo: *he yawns in Yan’s face* Arsé-kun: Minako: Cool, thanks! Here’s the, uh, 'thanks for helping’ start payment! *she hands Yan some cash and a few embers. mmm good shit* Sheepy: Yan: *he pockets them and gets up* Great, let’s go! Arsé-kun: *Mori finally “notices” his coffin is on Angra and frees the poor bastard right before they Head Outtie. Chaldea, hoooo* Sheepy: Yan: So, what pizza are we getting? Arsé-kun: *Minako promptly goes OFF about pizza. Girl likes her pizza, and knows how everybody in her crew (except Sherlock) likes it! She will learn his order eventually and he’ll damn like it* Sheepy: Yan: Huh. Arsé-kun: Minako: So anyway, you’re helping, so I’ll buy you some too. Sheepy: Yan: Oh, that’s great! Sheepy: Yan: I like…actually, I don’t really care what’s on it. Sheepy: Yan: I like experimenting. Sheepy: Yan: There’s no food I really hate so I’ll accept anything. Arsé-kun: Minako: So we figure it out when we get there, gotcha! Sheepy: Yan: Yeah, just mess me up. Arsé-kun: Tepes: I’m just as capable of that. *he strolls in, grabs Yan, and goes to exit scene. oh.* Sheepy: Yan: OH? Arsé-kun: *But the most important part of any plan is improvising on the fly!!* Sheepy: Yan: But my pizza! Arsé-kun: Minako: Oh, no, my pizza buddy! *and she “chases” after Tepes, at the speed of a brisk walk, maybe even, if she’s daring, a jog.* Arsé-kun: Tepes: I found him, dear. It was far less trying than I expected. Sheepy: Haku: Thank you. Sheepy: Yan: I’ve been tricked, betrayed! Arsé-kun: Tepes: ..? Sheepy: Yan: That’s why I was dragged out, out of the comfort of Puppy’s fur! Arsé-kun: Minako: My evil plot’s been foiled! *she catches up* I was really going to give you pizza, too! Sheepy: Yan: Pizza… Sheepy: Yan: Why did you want me, Tepes? Sheepy: Yan: Oh, oh! My dashing good looks and charming smile havs finally gotten to you! Hehe! Arsé-kun: Tepes: I was only informed of the 'Bringing you here’ portion of this so called “evil plot”. … And I’m still straight. Sheepy: Yan: Oh!? So it’s not that after all? Arsé-kun: Tepes: If it’s ever that, assume I am completely broken and most likely need to be put down. Sheepy: Yan: You’re so cruel… Sheepy: Yan: What about you, Haku?! Sheepy: Haku: No. Sheepy: Yan: Oh…such a quick response… Sheepy: Yan: But, like, I’m attractive, aren’t I? Arsé-kun: Caligula: roma Arsé-kun: *thank you for your input, caligula. it is very useful.* Sheepy: Yan: See, Caligula agrees. Sheepy: Haku: Hmm. Arsé-kun: Minako: I already paid him to help with my pizza run..! Can we get that out of the way at least? Sheepy: Haku: Go ahead. Sheepy: Gawain: I want pizza, too. Sheepy: Yan: Oh! Great! You can buy it! Arsé-kun: Cali: *pizza run? run? running? olympic running? greeks? romans? roma? roma!* *with this incredible stretch of logic and wisdom, Caligula decides to grab Yan and exit the scene at a high speed. Goodbye. it is pizza run time.* Sheepy: Gawain: And there they go. Sheepy: Haku: Oh, that frightens me. Arsé-kun: Minako: … Uh, okay. I’m glad I told him the order at least? Sheepy: Haku: That’s fortunate. Arsé-kun: Minako: I hope he remembers it? Sheepy: Gawain: But he didn’t get mine. Sheepy: Yan: [text: to Mink] Like 15 cheeses huh Arsé-kun: Mink: ….. ….. He did not. Sheepy: Gawain: But my order. Arsé-kun: *mink carefully types out the entire thing, clearly, in list format, edited for clarity and spelling, and then pauses* Arsé-kun: Minako: I’ll add it in, what'cha want, Sir? Sheepy: Gawain: I like pineapple pizza. Arsé-kun: Minako: Okay! *she adds that in and sends it off. no judgement, surprisingly* Sheepy: Gawain: I can give you the equivalent in flowers. *he laughs* I do have money, though, so I’ll pay you for mine. Sheepy: Gawain: *he takes out his wallet* But you should visit my flower shop. I’ll give you a discount. Arsé-kun: Minako: Oooh! I’ll have to stop by later then! :Dc Sheepy: Gawain: Yeah! Arsé-kun: Minako: But uh… Yeah, Probably should have stopped that whole thing from happening. Sorry about that! Sheepy: Haku: I understand. Arsé-kun: Minako: Am… I allowed to ask about all that, or is that a patient confidence thing? Arsé-kun: Minako: Cuz, uhm.. Moriarty-san dealt with it really fast, like it’s a thing we should know about? Sheepy: Haku: Oh. Sheepy: Haku: He’s not a full servant. Sheepy: Haku: He’s mixed with a phantom, Doppelganger Arsé-kun: Minako: So like… A second of himself? Sheepy: Haku: Of everyone he’s killed. Arsé-kun: Minako: And that’s… A lot? Sheepy: Haku: It allows him to transform into anyone, but the voices of his victims remain. Sheepy: Haku: Yes. Arsé-kun: Minako: Yikes. Good thing he’s with you then, I guess? Sheepy: Gawain: He’s always eyeing the same women I am, so if your plan is to let him stay with them… Sheepy: Gawain: Oh, I should ask him for the phone number he got. Arsé-kun: Tepes: That is your priority? Sheepy: Gawain: What should my priority be? Arsé-kun: Tepes: Not phone numbers of randoms you haven’t met yourself. Sheepy: Gawain: Well, do you have any better ideas? Arsé-kun: Tepes: Meet people yourself? Sheepy: Gawain: I do, but usually only for one night. Arsé-kun: Tepes: Go directly to church, do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars. Sheepy: Gawain: Oh, it’s not as though I don’t still love my wife. Sheepy: Gawain: However, now that I’m a servant, I can have fun, maybe find a new wife in the process. Arsé-kun: Tepes: …. Fair enough. Sheepy: Gawain: You’re no different. Sheepy: Gawain: I just choose different tactics. More bold tactics. Arsé-kun: Minako: … Hey, I just caught something. What’d you mean 'Let him stay with them’?? Sheepy: Gawain: Well, if Moriarty helps him a lot, wouldn’t it be better if he stayed with Moriarty? Arsé-kun: Minako: Makes sense, but he isn’t mine? Sheepy: Gawain: He could be. Arsé-kun: Minako: Moriarty isn’t mine, I mean! I’ve got objections about Yan but.. Wait, he doesn’t live here? Sheepy: Haku: He bums off of everyone here, but especially us. Arsé-kun: Minako: So he does! He said he didn’t! Sheepy: Haku: He’s not my Servant, but he likes Tepes, Caligula, and me. He also likes both our and Gawain’s food. Sheepy: Haku: That’s usually why he’s seen with me. Sheepy: Gawain:…Hey, hold on… Sheepy: Gawain: You forgot me in that first list. Sheepy: Haku: But anyway, who is Moriarty’s master? How close do they live to you? Arsé-kun: Minako: My neighbor, and my neighbor. Sheepy: Haku: I don’t know. You or your neighbor might be best with taking him, but he’d probably end up staying here just as often as he already does. Sheepy: Haku: He’s a part of different clubs and has close friends who live here. Arsé-kun: Minako: I don’t think that’d be a problem. I mean, some of mine come here two or three times a week already. Sheepy: Haku: That’s good. Sheepy: Haku: Are you fine with this? We’ll need to ask him when he gets back. Arsé-kun: Minako: I’m fine with it! Sheepy: Haku: Good. Sheepy: Gawain: I get more chances at women this way. Thanks for that. Arsé-kun: *Tepes pinches the bridge of his nose. Jesus Christ.* Sheepy: Gawain: You need to learn how to have more fun in life. Arsé-kun: Tepes: I can have fun without shamelessly flirting with every woman I spot, thank you. Sheepy: Gawain: I have an idea! Sheepy: Gawain: You can go out with me next time. Arsé-kun: Tepes: Why not take Caligula? You’ll look far better next to him. Sheepy: Gawain: I’d look far better next to you, too. Arsé-kun: Tepes: I’m detecting an insult. Sheepy: Gawain: I’d never. Arsé-kun: Tepes: And if you have realized, what you have said also translates to “Hey, vampire, come out at night surrounded by a lot of people.” Please spot the problem. Sheepy: Gawain: Oh, I forgot you were a vampire. Arsé-kun: Tepes: For now, I’ll respectfully decline your offer, unless you come across a daytime event. Then I may consider it. Sheepy: Gawain: I can arrange for it to be a daytime event. Arsé-kun: Tepes: No, no. Sheepy: Gawain: Why? Arsé-kun: Tepes: Don’t force others’ to plan around me. Sheepy: Gawain: Well, alright. Arsé-kun: Cali: PIZZA! *thank you for your announcement, Caligula. He is carrying… Two boxes. Out of how much?* Sheepy: Gawain: I hope one is pineapple! Sheepy: Yan: Tepes! Gawain! I’m dying! Arsé-kun: Tepes: It’s just a few boxes. Are you a Heroic Spirit, or some kind of mouse? Sheepy: Yan: It’s HOT!! Sheepy: Yan: …But not as hot as me- AaaaAAAA DON’T FALL!! Sheepy: Gawain: He stole my line…he has to go. Arsé-kun: Tepes: *he moves in for the Assist. he’s help* Arsé-kun: Cali: pizza Sheepy: Yan: You could’ve helped, Caligula. Arsé-kun: Cali: Rgh? *he puts down his boxes* ?? Sheepy: Yan: You left me with everything else.. Arsé-kun: Cali: *he takes the stack from Yan and puts it down. He has now helped. Confused thumbs up.* Sheepy: Yan: Owowow…it was so hot! Sheepy: Gawain: Like- Sheepy: Yan: Like me. Arsé-kun: Tepes: Stop. Sheepy: Yan: But who else will say it if not me? Arsé-kun: Tepes: Anyone else with an ego over ten. Sheepy: Yan: But comic relief is one of my defining character traits. Arsé-kun: *Tepes opts out of giving this a response.* Arsé-kun: Minako: Anyway! You’ve made it this far! A bit more and we’re home! With pizza! Arsé-kun: *she is eyeing the pizza boxes already. mm. pizz.* Sheepy: Yan: You’re right. Arsé-kun: Minako: You can stay too, if you want! Sheepy: Yan: Huh? Arsé-kun: Minako: I mean, you’re over enough! Sheepy: Yan: ….! Arsé-kun: Minako: I’m pretty sure nobody hates you on my end, and considering who I’ve got, that’s impressive! Sheepy: Yan: Thank you…! Arsé-kun: Minako: You’re welcome!!! Arsé-kun: Mephisto: What’re you doin’, Master? Dating a boy? *how long has he been there, in the doorway?* Without me, even?? *he’s kidding, I hope.* Sheepy: Yan: What? Arsé-kun: Minako: Please, no. *she is unfazed by 100% of that. She knew he was there.* I won’t stop you though! Go forth and be gay, and merry, and help us bring home pizza. Arsé-kun: *Mephisto considers this, and promptly fucks off. Oh.* Arsé-kun: Minako: … So I’m still paying you in full I guess, Assassin! Sheepy: Yan: Oh, for what? Arsé-kun: Minako: For… Carrying pizza?? Sheepy: Yan:…Great! Arsé-kun: *OK enough dicking around, they’re gonna get home eventually, with the pizza, and Yan gets paid right before that. cash fuckin’ money* Sheepy: Holmes: Oh, it’s pizza. Arsé-kun: Mephisto: Yeah, it is! Did you think I was making it up? Sheepy: Holmes: No, I didn’t. Sheepy: Holmes: I hope you enjoy it. I’ll be passing, of course. Arsé-kun: Minako: Eh? Sheepy: Holmes: I’m not hungry currently. Arsé-kun: Proto: It’s pizza time, hurry! Dibs, I call first dibs! *and he zips in, nearly faceplanting into the table. gg idiot* Sheepy: Holmes: That’s the benefit of being a Servant. Arsé-kun: Minako: Fair enough, but if you want some later, there might not be any! Sheepy: Holmes: I don’t have an interest in it, and Watson would kill me if he found me eating it. Arsé-kun: Minako: What’s he gonna do to you? Hit you for resisted damage? Sheepy: Holmes: Nag me. Arsé-kun: Minako: Is nagging strong against Rulers? Sheepy: Holmes: Perhaps. Arsé-kun: Minako: I’ll have to try that later! Sheepy: Holmes: For what reason? Arsé-kun: Minako: For science? Sheepy: Holmes: I’d rather you didn’t. Sheepy: Gil: *he huffs* Mongrel food again? Arsé-kun: Minako: You’re gonna eat it anyway. Sheepy: Kogil: I like pep- Sheepy: Gil: Pepperoni is garbage, pup. Sheepy: Gil: Cheese is better. Arsé-kun: Minako: Thank you for your opinions, kings! I didn’t ask! Sheepy: Gil: Hah, if he wants to be a king, he needs to know how a king thinks. Arsé-kun: Lance: … A king thinks “Is this edible?” and then eats it. Immediately, without comment. Sheepy: Gil: That’s how a peasant thinks. Arsé-kun: Lance: … No, you. *he’s got no witty comebacks, and glances towards Yan* ..? Sheepy: Yan: Hi hi! I’m living here now. Sheepy: Yan: I don’t know why but that’s what’s been decided. Arsé-kun: Lance: Aaah? That is.. It’s something. Unexpected? Sheepy: Yan: Actually, Gawain was cheering in his own way. Arsé-kun: Lance: Git. Sheepy: Yan: Huh? Sheepy: Yan: He’s burly and looks like a football player so he’s not really attractive. He asks me for phone numbers often. Sheepy: Yan: So he probably thinks he got rid of competition. Arsé-kun: Lance: He still..? … GorrRRrrilla morrron. Sheepy: Yan: I don’t get why. Sheepy: Yan: I just like talking to pretty people, and I like it even more when they compliment me. Sheepy: Yan: But Gawain sees me as competition… Arsé-kun: Lance: Everrryone is competition… Don’t worry about ittt.. Sheepy: Yan: Even you? Arsé-kun: Lance: I hope nooot. Sheepy: Yan: Are men in armor hot nowadays? Sheepy: Holmes: Depending on the temperature, yes. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: You’ve made Hyde very happy with that answer. I don’t have to say it now, thank you. Sheepy: Holmes: You’re welcome. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: And thank you for dinner, Master. You too, Assassin. Sheepy: Yan: No problem. Arsé-kun: Minako: Of course! Sheepy: Lobo: *he struts in and flops over dramatically onto Lance* Arsé-kun: Lance: Nooooooooonnn! *he tries to get out from under Lobo* Sheepy: Lobo: *whine* Sheepy: Yan: Puppy! Sheepy: *…Despite his whining, Lobo’s tail is wagging. He’s very aware of his manipulation and is happy about it.* Arsé-kun: *Lance does not escape. He accepts his fate to starve.* Sheepy: Yan: Puppy, you can have my pizza if you get off of him. Sheepy: Lobo: *he gives Yan a suspicious look* Sheepy: *Lobo hesitantly gets off of Lance* Arsé-kun: *Lancelot is dead. Not really. But he’s already committed.* Sheepy: Gil: A king doesn’t beg. He demands. Sheepy: Lobo: *he turns to Gil before…eating his slice of pizza.* Arsé-kun: Medusa: I don’t know what you expected. Sheepy: Gil: Not that! How dare him! Arsé-kun: Andersen: Just take another, your highness. And while you’re up there, pass me a plate. Sheepy: Gil: *he huffs, but surprisingly does so* Arsé-kun: Andersen: Thank you. You’re spared. Sheepy: Gil: Be grateful, mongrel! Arsé-kun: Andersen: I am. Sheepy: Gil: Fuhahaha! Excellent! Arsé-kun: Andersen: So what? Is this uncertain jeste- Arsé-kun: Mephisto: Hey, wait. Sheepy: Yan: Huh? Arsé-kun: Andersen: You’re a piece of shit, not a jester. Anyway, is this uncertain tall drink of water and booze staying with us now? Sheepy: Yan: Me? Arsé-kun: Andersen: Yes, you. Sheepy: Yan: Yeah, that’s apparently the case. Arsé-kun: Andersen: Finally, an assassin that keeps their class. It’s about time. Sheepy: Yan: Yeah! Sorta. Arsé-kun: Andersen: More than Twit and Twat over here. Good enough. Sheepy: Yan: Great! Sheepy: Holmes: You’re only missing Avenger, R..ider, you do have a rider… Arsé-kun: Medusa: Do you have eyes? Sheepy: Holmes: Exactly two, no more. Arsé-kun: Medusa: Do they both work? Do you need a hint from the peanut gallery? Arsé-kun: *she’s genuinely asking, that’s not sarcasm* Sheepy: Holmes: I’m aware you’re a rider. Arsé-kun: Medusa: Then what is missing? Avenger and what? Sheepy: Holmes: Hmmm? Sheepy: Holmes: Did I say there were two missing? Sheepy: Holmes: I only meant Avenger. Sheepy: Holmes: Ah, of course … Sheepy: Holmes: We’re also missing, of the special classes, Shielder, Alter Ego, Moon Cancer…yes, that’s it. Arsé-kun: Minako: And let’s maybe not get that last one. Sheepy: Holmes: Right. Sheepy: Emiya: ….*he raises his eyebrows* Arsé-kun: Andersen: Skip Alter Ego. They’re all extremely difficult in different ways. Sheepy: Holmes: That’s understandable. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: And the single Shielder belongs to Chaldea. We’d have to pass. Sheepy: Emiya: What about Foreigner? Arsé-kun: Minako: …?? *she’s got her mouth full* ???? Sheepy: Holmes: *he forces a smile* I don’t know of it. Arsé-kun: Andersen: …. ….. Arsé-kun: Minako: What’s foreigner? That new? Sheepy: Emiya: Ah, Master. Based on what I’ve heard, the Foreigner class is a recently discovered class. Arsé-kun: Minako: That’s kinda exciting! What do they do? Sheepy: Emiya: As the name implies, it consists of hosts of otherworldly beings. Sheepy: Emiya: Berserkers do very little to them. Arsé-kun: Minako: Berserkers… I don’t like that very much. Sheepy: Emiya: They, meanwhile, easily slaughter Berserkers. Be careful. Sheepy: Holmes:…. Arsé-kun: Minako: Noted. Thanks, Emiya-san. Sheepy: Holmes: (What do we do?) Arsé-kun: Holmes?: (…? We’re doing something? Why?) Sheepy: Holmes: (It’s clear Andersen suspects us.) Arsé-kun: Holmes?: (Who?) Sheepy: Holmes: (The one with blue hair and glasses.) Arsé-kun: Holmes?: (… Why are you asking me..? My answer is always 'flatten it’) Sheepy: Holmes: (…Right, thanks.) Arsé-kun: Holmes?: (You’re… Welcome?) Sheepy: Holmes: You might want to try to find one to deal with Berserkers, then. Arsé-kun: Minako: But we can hit Berserkers with anything. Sheepy: Holmes: But they do extra damage in turn. Arsé-kun: Minako: Ehhh.. *she shrugs* Bomb 'em and run like hell, I guess. Sheepy: Holmes: I see. Arsé-kun: Holmes?: (I don’t!) Sheepy: Holmes: (I know) Sheepy: Holmes: (But you have my eyes.) Arsé-kun: Holmes?: (It helps a lot!) Sheepy: Holmes: (I’m glad.) Arsé-kun: *Hans continues to be suspicious. Nothing has changed. But thankfully, he’s the only one. Maybe?* Sheepy: Holmes:….. Arsé-kun: Andersen: …… Sheepy: Holmes: Did you have something you wanted to ask me? Arsé-kun: Andersen: I did. Sheepy: Holmes: What is it? Arsé-kun: Andersen: *he scribbles something down on a napkin, folds it, and passes it over.* That. Sheepy: Holmes: *he reads it* Arsé-kun: *All it says is “I won’t say anything, Sir.” There’s a bad thumbs up emoji next to it. “Why do you look more introspective than Henry when Hyde’s being a bitch?”* Sheepy: Holmes: *he writes something down and passes it back* Arsé-kun: Andersen: *he takes it and opens it* Sheepy: *“I have a companion of my own, who happens to be relevant currently.”* Arsé-kun: Andersen: … *he nods to Sherlock and pockets the napkin* Sheepy: Gil: What am I missing? Sheepy: Gil: I don’t care but I don’t appreciate secrets being hid from me. Arsé-kun: Andersen: We’re talking shit about Mr. Twat. Sheepy: Gil: Oh, I really don’t care then. Arsé-kun: Andersen: I knew you had it in you. Sheepy: Gil: What? Arsé-kun: Andersen: Doesn’t a great king not care what the peasants say? Sheepy: Kogil: He cares because it’s his job to serve his people. Arsé-kun: Andersen: So I can’t call him a nosy bitch and move on with my life? What a shame. Sheepy: Kogil: Huh? Oh, no, he is. Sheepy: Gil: Oh…you… Sheepy: Gil: You…! Arsé-kun: Andersen: …. … You weren’t supposed to agree with me. I enjoy living. Sheepy: Kogil: Curiosity is what makes us human. Sheepy: Kogil: Unfortunately, being nosy is being a little too curious. Arsé-kun: Medusa: So what’s that make the floating cupcake? *he points up to Mephisto, who looks more amused than insulted* A moron? Sheepy: Kogil: Humanity isn’t something you’re born with. Sheepy: Kogil: It’s something you achieve. Sheepy: Kogil: Anyone can become human. They just have to want to try. Sheepy: Gil: Why would they want to? Arsé-kun: Medusa: It’s better than being a beast. Sheepy: Gil: Hah. It’s true. Arsé-kun: Medusa: Most things are better than that, though. It’s kind of a low bar. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: *he shifts a bit closer to Yan, getting out of Lance’s way* … It’s nice to have another Assassin on board. We get pressured beyond belief against Riders, haha.. Sheepy: Yan: That really sounds like a problem. Sheepy: Yan: But worry not! I have experience with Riders. Sheepy: Yan: Like Puppy used to be a Rider. Weren’t you, Puppy? Sheepy: Lobo: *he lifts his head up from sniffing at Lance and blinks at Yan* Arsé-kun: Jekyll: Was he? I would understand if his, well, rider was, but he himself? Sheepy: Yan: They act as one unit. Sheepy: Yan: But he isn’t three phantoms combined into one. Sheepy: Yan: Those are just the three who survived. Sheepy: Yan: Lobo ate the rest to gain their powers, which is how he ended up an Avenger. Sheepy: Yan: But before that, they were just the Rider class. Sheepy: Yan: Kind of like Kintoki’s motorcycle. He is the rider, but without his motorcycle, can he really be called one? It’s the motorcycle that defines him as a Rider, and therefore, it’s a part of his identity as a Rider. Simply, it too could be considered part of the Rider class. Sheepy: Yan: However, it couldn’t be summoned without Kintoki, because its identity isn’t well known. Likewise, Kintoki couldn’t be summoned within the Rider class without his motorcycle. Similarly, Lobo couldn’t be summoned without his rider nor Jack, which could be said for the other two. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: I understand entirely. Sheepy: Yan: That’s the situation Old Man and I have as well. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: Let me see if I got this straight. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: It’s like trying to summon me without Hyde, or Hyde without me. Without the other, neither of us are worth much. Sheepy: Yan: Mostly. Sheepy: Yan: We couldn’t survive without our partner. Sheepy: Yan: Our presence isn’t strong enough. We’re just phantoms. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: I’d believe it still applies, honestly. At least to me. Sheepy: Yan: But even little droplets of rain add up to a flood. Sheepy: Yan: So when enough phantoms come together… Sheepy: Yan: Our power is such of a Heroic Spirit’s. Sheepy: Yan: So very similar to your situation. Sheepy: Yan: But while you two come from the same source, we get merged with strangers. Sheepy: Yan: Really, the one who intimidates me in that respect is Old Man. The whole thing about his partner phantom’s story is hurting the one you love unintentionally. Sheepy: Yan: Lobo’s just many hateful spirits in one, and I’m not of much interest in that respect. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: *he thinks about this.* I… “I” want to know now, but I think if you’ve got no interest in talking about it, then lets pass it by. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: But could that be why he and Sherlock haven’t knocked the walls down yet? Arsé-kun: Jekyll: Because if he comes to care for Sherlock, the bullets might target him? Sheepy: Yan: I don’t think so. Sheepy: Yan: I think they’re mutually using each other to some extent, and… Arsé-kun: Jekyll: … And? Sheepy: Yan: Look at it this way. Let’s say they fought, and that cursed bullet was accidentally shot. Sheepy: Yan: Who do you think it would hit? Arsé-kun: Jekyll: … Ah, I see what you were saying. Mutual avoidance. Sheepy: Yan: It’s too dangerous for someone in that situation to fight unnecessarily. Sheepy: Yan: I’m sure Holmes recognizes that too. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: Oh, certainly. Arsé-kun: Medusa: You two can just ask him. He’s right here. Or is this normal Assassin business? Sheepy: Yan: Yeah, it’s normal Assassin business. Sheepy: Yan: It’s an exclusive club. Sheepy: Yan: But yeah, that’s all I’ve got. Arsé-kun: Jekyll: I suppose I’ll keep it in mind. And try to keep it in “his” too. Sheepy: Yan: Great! Arsé-kun: Minako: Oh, and thanks for behaving this time, everybody! *she lifts up her hand. two command seals have Returned* I’m glad we didn’t need to enact violence! Sheepy: Gil: Hah, I could take them if I so pleased. Arsé-kun: Minako: I can take your controllers if I pleased, so what? Sheepy: Gil: I could buy new ones. Arsé-kun: Minako: And while you’re gone, hide everything else. Sheepy: Gil:…..My POINT is that you have no control over me. Arsé-kun: Minako: Ok. Sheepy: Gil: Kuhahahaha! You see now, how powerless you are against me, mongrel! Sheepy: Gil: Be grateful! Sheepy: Gil: I have decided to allow you to put on this charade still! Arsé-kun: Minako: Thank you so much for your opinions! They’re worth money I think. Sheepy: Gil: Kuhahahaha! Of course! Sheepy: Gil: And you’re getting it for free! Sheepy: Gil: Be grateful, mongrel! Arsé-kun: Minako: I’m a bit more grateful for not living on the street, but thanks anyway! Sheepy: Gil: You’re welcome. Sheepy: *later, at night!* Sheepy: — Drip. Drip. Drip. The rain was falling harshly upon Bedivere and Lucan as they carried their king to safety. They barely recognized its uncomfortable sogginess as they slowly persevered. Bedivere was barely conscious of his surroundings until he heard his brother let out a soft, pained groan. “…Lucan, you should rest. I can carry him on my own.” “Don’t worry, I’m fine… it’s just a bit more, isn’t it?” Lucan smiled, but Bedivere couldn’t focus on that. Bright red droplets caught his eye - a sight he had seen regularly that day. Drip. Drip. Drip. Blood was pooling from Lucan’s body. but his smile didn’t fade. He couldn’t let it fade. No, his king needed him. His brother needed him. Once he loses his smile, he loses everything. “Lucan… you’re bleeding.” “I’ve had worse,” Lucan laughed, cut off midway by a sharp pain within him that shook him to his core. But he has to keep smiling. He needs to. Drip. Drip. Drip. Thud. ”LUCAN!” Lucan couldn’t summon the strength to respond. It felt as though his insides had just exploded. His brother’s screams were just background noises as things grew dark, leaving Bedivere alone with his king. “LUCAN…!” Bedivere shot up from his bed, still crying out his brother’s name. The only response he received was the light rain outside. Drip. Drip. Drip. Bedivere used to love the rain. Now all it reminds him of is his failure as a knight. — Arsé-kun: *Good morning, Bedivere! It is, in fact, lightly raining. According to Merlin’s pink digital clock, it is approximately 4:30 AM.* Arsé-kun: *Also of note is Merlin’s apparent absence, which is a mystery easily solved. Idiot fell off the bed. The Grand Caster, everybody.* Sheepy: *Bedi looks over at Merlin and contemplates waking him to get him off of the floor* Arsé-kun: *Merlin certainly isn’t taking any action to deal with this.* Sheepy: *Bedi gets out of bed and gently shakes Merlin* Sheepy: Bedi: Ummm… Arsé-kun: Merlin: ….. Aye..? Sheepy: Bedi: You’re sleeping on the floor. Arsé-kun: Merlin: … So I was… *He slowly sits up and blinks himself into at least some alertness.* … Why AM I on the floor..? Sheepy: Bedi: I probably shoved you off, but maybe you rolled off. Arsé-kun: Merlin: I don’t feel sore, so probably did it myself. Oopsies!~ :P c Sheepy: Bedi: I’d recommend not sleeping on the floor. Arsé-kun: Merlin: You’re right. But why are you down here with me? Sheepy: Bedi: I, uh, I woke up from a nightmare. Arsé-kun: Merlin: *he immediately looks concerned* Are you okay? Sheepy: Bedi: It’s no problem! I’m fine. Arsé-kun: Merlin: If you say so.. Are you coming back to bed? Sheepy: Bedi: I think I’m up for the night. Sheepy: Bedi: It’s difficult to sleep through the rain. Arsé-kun: Merlin: Aww. Well, hopefully it’ll stop soon, for your sake. Sheepy: Bedi: Thank you. I’ll be fine. This is normal. Arsé-kun: Merlin: That’s what worries me. *he pats Bedi’s shoulder, then drags himself up and back onto the bed. Ugh. MOVING. What a CHORE.* Sheepy: Bedi: There’s no need to worry. It’s normal, so I’m used to it. Arsé-kun: Merlin: That’s why I’m worried!! You’re going to go Stockholm on your own nightmares.. Sheepy: Bedi:….? Arsé-kun: Merlin: … I’ll tell you in the morning. Sheepy: Bedi: *he forces a smile* Thank you. I’ll try to remember in case you forget. Arsé-kun: Merlin: 'Welcome. *he rolls over and pulls the blanket back up.* Sheepy: Bedi: Good night. Arsé-kun: Merlin: 'Ight. Sheepy: Bedi: *he waits for a bit before heading out of the room to find something to do* Arsé-kun: *It’s quiet. But not too quiet. This is not a horror film.* Sheepy: Bedi: *is anyone up?* Arsé-kun: *Well, the vampires and Rider, playing a silent game of cards. Vlad looks #done* Sheepy: Lobo: *he is looking at the cards blankly* Sheepy: Lobo: *he looks up and begins snarling* Arsé-kun: Vlad: …? Sheepy: Bedi: I’m sorry for interrupting. Sheepy: Bedi: I was just looking for something to do. Arsé-kun: Vlad: Ah, that is fine. Do you wish to join us? Sheepy: Bedi: I’m not very good at cards, but… Arsé-kun: Vlad: You do not have to be. Sheepy: Bedi: Then I’d like to join. Arsé-kun: Vlad: Pull up a seat. We’re only playing go fish. Sheepy: Bedi: *he pulls up a seat and sits at the table* Arsé-kun: *Vlad deals him a hand and the game continues* Sheepy: Lobo: *he flops over on the ground partway through the game* Arsé-kun: *His cards are distributed accordingly* Sheepy: Bedi: This reminds me of the games I used to play with my fellow knights. Sheepy: Bedi: Some of us were more competitive than others, such as… Sheepy: Bedi:…Sir Lancelot and Sir Gawain. Sheepy: Bedi: Meanwhile, Sir Tristan would fall asleep, on the opposite side of the spectrum. Arsé-kun: Vlad: I’m rather glad this Lancelot does not join us, then. This is not meant to be competitive. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, I agree. Although…I doubt the Berserker would act that way Sheepy: Bedi: However, Saber… Arsé-kun: Vlad: … I would fear for our quiet evenings. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, our games would get intense very quickly. Arsé-kun: Vlad: Amadeus would have our heads. Sheepy: Bedi: …However, I would be lying if I said I didn’t miss those days. … Ah, Mozart…. Sheepy: Bedi:…He probably already wants my head. Sheepy: Bedi: I’m sorry if my shouting bothered you. Arsé-kun: Vlad: Not at all. Sheepy: Bedi: I’m happy to hear that. Sheepy: Lobo: *he has turned his attention to chewing on a squeaky toy* Arsé-kun: Vlad: … This is why. Sheepy: Bedi: Poor Mozart… Arsé-kun: *Suddenly flying down the stairs and whizzing past the table is what looks like a football. Lobo! Get the football!* Sheepy: Lobo: *he launches at the football and grabs it with his teeth* Arsé-kun: *No more squeaky noises!* Sheepy: Lobo: *he plops down on the ground next to Vlad and continues chewing on the football* Arsé-kun: Mozart: How utterly awful that was! *he has arrived downstairs* Sheepy: Bedi: I apologize for my shouting. Arsé-kun: Mozart: That’s quite fine. It isn’t something you can help. Squeaky toys at 3 am, however… *he shoots Lobo a dirty glare* Sheepy: Lobo: *he ignores Mozart in favor of focusing on the football* Arsé-kun: Mozart: *he snatches up the squeaky toy, and goes to exit after a quick little wave. goodbye mozart* Sheepy: Lobo: *he looks up and blinks. where did his squeaky toy go* Arsé-kun: *it vanished! (thank god)* Sheepy: Lobo: *he stands up and starts sniffing around. does Vlad have it?* Arsé-kun: *Vlad holds his hands up. He does not have it!* Sheepy: Lobo: *he sniffs at Vlad’s hands* Arsé-kun: *no toy! Vlad pats his nose though* Sheepy: Lobo: *he nuzzles Vlad in response* Arsé-kun: *good shit op* Sheepy: Bedi: I feel like I should be doing something of importance, being up this late. Arsé-kun: Vlad: It does often feel that way, doesn’t it? But perhaps there is. Sheepy: Bedi: There’s something I should be doing… Arsé-kun: Vlad: Perhaps, perhaps not. Sheepy: Bedi: What do you think it could be? Arsé-kun: Vlad: I would have no idea. Why don’t you take a walk around the halls? It’s unlikely you’ll be interrupted. Sheepy: Bedi: Oh! Good idea. Arsé-kun: Vlad: And while you do that.. Carmilla? Shall we go out and get lunch? Sheepy: Carmilla: Yeah, sure. Arsé-kun: Vlad: Great, because I was going to go no matter the answer. Sheepy: Carmilla: Wow. Arsé-kun: Vlad: We’d better get going, then, before it gets light out. Sheepy: Carmilla: Yeah. Arsé-kun: *spoop patrol exits scene.* Sheepy: *Bedi, meanwhile, is walking through the halls* Arsé-kun: *It’s dark. It’s quiet. It’s kinda nice, but also a little bit spooky.* Sheepy: *Bedi doesn’t mind it.* Arsé-kun: *Thankfully his eyes have adjusted to the darkness, so he can see where he is going. Only the furthest parts of the hall are hard to see, and for some reason a nearby doorway. Maybe it’s just the angle he’s on.* Sheepy: Bedi:….? Sheepy: *Bedi goes to investigate* Arsé-kun: *It’s very dark, even up close. Like, super dark. This isn’t normal darkness. This is ADVANCED DARKNESS!* Sheepy: Bedi: *he slowly puts out Airgetlam to touch it* Arsé-kun: *It, strangely enough, shrinks back from his hand. Scared darkness? That’s weird.* Sheepy: Bedi:…Hello? Arsé-kun: *The darkness doesn’t answer back. This is.. Probably a good thing?* Sheepy: Bedi: Huh. Sheepy: Bedi: I was expecting more of a response…what is this? Sheepy: *Bedi begins poking at it with Airgetlam* Arsé-kun: *It continues retreating, and shrinking. Bedi can now see some of the room. It’s nothing special.* Sheepy: Bedi: If only I had a flashlight. Sheepy: Bedi:…. Sheepy: Bedi:…..*he looks to Airgetlam* Sheepy: Bedi: Airgetlam, switch on! *Airgetlam shines brightly!* Arsé-kun: *Some of the room is instantly lit up! The rest is.. Still pitch black. As I said before, this is ADVANCED DARKNESS* Sheepy: Bedi:…! Sheepy: Bedi: *he pokes at it again* Arsé-kun: *The shadows retreat a bit more than they had prior, with a bit of a… Whine? It was something.* Sheepy: Bedi: Oh! It’s alive! Sheepy: Bedi: Hello? Arsé-kun: *It eventually stops shrinking, leaving a ball of shadow on the sofa. But no answer.* Sheepy: Bedi: *he gently shakes it* Arsé-kun: *There’s a very quiet but distressed “Go awayyy..!” from the shadows, which shift away before becoming a tighter ball.* Sheepy: Bedi: ….? Sheepy: Bedi: I apologize, it’s just… Sheepy: Bedi: You…were kind of…um.. Sheepy: Bedi:…well. You piqued my curiosity. Arsé-kun: ?: Dooon’t…! *They recoil away from Bedi, despite him not touching them this time.* Jus’ kill me and get it over with…! Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? I won’t hurt you! Sheepy: Bedi: It’s okay. Everything is fine. I’ll stand back until you feel comfortable with me approaching, okay? Arsé-kun: ?: … always do, it’s… fault, it’s my fault, it’s my fault, it’s my f*They hiccup really quietly* why why why why why why why whyyyyy*hic*yyyyy..? Sheepy: Bedi: …? Sheepy: Bedi: What is? Arsé-kun: ?: … … .nnn… Arsé-kun: ?: …… not the carving tools againnnnn… … anything but… Arsé-kun: *His voice slowly gets louder as he pleads with an unseen enemy, begging them not to hurt him again. It culminates in screaming and violently thrashing up off the sofa- most likely hitting Bedivere (but doing little to no actual damage)- before coming to a stop hanging off of the sofa and panting heavily. Despite all of this, he hasn’t actually woken himself up entirely.* Arsé-kun: *As well, now that he has stopped being curled up into a ball, he’s now recognizable as Angra (if he wasn’t before.)* Sheepy: Bedi: It’s okay, it’s okay. No one will hurt you here. Arsé-kun: Angra: … …? *he slightly looks up at Bedi* … Sheepy: Bedi: I’m sorry for waking you. However… Arsé-kun: Angra: … *he blinks, and pauses before jumping up onto the back of the sofa. A very delayed reaction.* H-how long have you been here?? Sheepy: Bedi: Not for too long. Arsé-kun: Angra: *he groans and flops back down* Great, cool! Now my traumatic backstory is out in the wild! Grrrrreat! *he is not pleased.* Sheepy: Bedi: You were having a nightmare, although I didn’t realize that at first. *he smiles* Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone. Sheepy: Bedi: I was just worried about you, so I stayed with you. Sheepy: Bedi: If I encounter you in such a state in the future, I could get you a blanket and leave you be instead if you would so prefer. Arsé-kun: Angra: … … *he looks more confused than anything* Uhm.. Thanks..? Sheepy: Bedi: I apologize if I’m making you uncomfortable. Arsé-kun: Angra: It’s not, um. *he huffs and sits up* I did mean thanks, that’s real, but.. *he seems conflicted, before just giving up on being subtle* Nobody’s ever that nice to me. You know what I am, yeah? Sheepy: Bedi: I do. Sheepy: Bedi: However… Sheepy: Bedi: I would never dislike you. Sheepy: Bedi: It doesn’t matter to me who you are. I won’t treat you poorly because of it. Arsé-kun: Angra: … … *he tilts his head to the side* Thank you? A terrible decision, really, but thanks anyway. Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Sheepy: Bedi: I don’t believe so. Sheepy: Bedi: I don’t dislike anyone. Arsé-kun: Angra: Anyone? Not even the dark shady butler guy? Sheepy: Bedi: No, I don’t dislike even him. Arsé-kun: Angra: Huh. Sheepy: Bedi: I see him as a problem to solve, but once he’s no longer attempting to hurt us, I wish him the best. Sheepy: Bedi: Perhaps one might find that odd, but… Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose I’m just an odd individual: Arsé-kun: Angra: *he thinks about this* You really are some sorta screwball, but hey, you’re not bad. Sheepy: Bedi: I’m happy to hear that. Sheepy: Bedi: However… Sheepy: Bedi: It saddens me to hear people don’t treat you very nicely. Sheepy: Bedi: Is there anything I could do for you? Sheepy: Bedi: I’m fairly good at cooking simple things and I can make coffee well, so maybe I could make something for you? Arsé-kun: Angra: … That’d be nice… Sheepy: Bedi: What would you like? Arsé-kun: Angra: Yer asking me? Hm.. Hmmmm! Something edible! Sheepy: Bedi: … Sheepy: Bedi: Do you have no preference…? Sheepy: Bedi: Ah…then I’ll share my favorite meal with you! Sheepy: Bedi: Do you mind vegetables? Arsé-kun: Angra: Great question! Lets find out. Sheepy: *Bedi goes to the kitchen and begins cooking steamed veggies!* Arsé-kun: *Angra follows him and plops into a chair. Obseeeerve* Sheepy: Bedi: What hobbies do you have? Arsé-kun: Angra: Does people watching count? Caaause if not, I got nothin’. Sheepy: Bedi: I think it does. Sheepy: Bedi: I found watching mankind evolve around me absolutely fascinating. Sheepy: Bedi:…Of course…my wanderings were my punishment, but even still, I enjoyed them to some extent. Sheepy: Bedi: Of course… Sheepy: Bedi: My favorite dish is what it is due to what it reminds me of. Sheepy: Bedi: Of course… Sheepy: Bedi: My favorite dish is what it is due to what it reminds me of. Sheepy: Bedi: The happy times of the Knights of the Round Table. I had it often back then because I loved it even then. Sheepy: Bedi: But now, it’s more of a symbol of…oh, I apologize for rambling. It’s a bad habit of mine. Arsé-kun: Angra: Nah, go ahead, dude. I ain’t got much to say. Sheepy: Bedi: So it doesn’t bore you? Arsé-kun: Angra: Not yet at least! Sheepy: Bedi: It’s more of a symbol of those happy times because I was completely incapable of making it on my travels. Arsé-kun: Angra: But you can now? Sheepy: Bedi: I’m capable of making it now, but it’s the only thing that truly remains from those times. Sheepy: Bedi: Do you ever wish things were just a bit different? Almost as though you could erase memories of the past that changed you? Arsé-kun: Angra: Fuck, man. I’d be some random schmuck otherwise. And some third schmuck would be stuck with what I had.. Feels bad. Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose. Sheepy: Bedi: I understand those memories are important, yet…I… Arsé-kun: Angra: Eh! Shit happens, it makes the world turn. That and black magic, but anyway. And then you die. Sheepy: Bedi:..I recognize we’ll never return to those happy times, so we just have to make new ones. But with Sir Lancelot a berserker due to what happened between himself and our King, Sir Gawain completely unrestrained by any moral compass in some respects due to our King not watching over him, and Sir Tristan in…ah, he hasn’t changed a bit. Sheepy: Bedi: But it feels like it’s impossible. Even if we’re happy together, something is missing. Something is wrong. Sheepy: Bedi: And it just weighs on the back of my mind. Arsé-kun: Angra: Get over it, that’s my advice. You’re not gettin’ it back. Never will. Why bother? Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, that’s true. Sheepy: Bedi: But… Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose why I bother is because I dearly love my friends. I’d like to see them smile again without seeing that guilt behind their eyes. …Other than Sir Tristan. Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, it’s ready. Arsé-kun: Angra: Well, tell them to stop bein’ pussies. Except the Berserker, I guess, he’ll kill me. Sheepy: *Bedi dishes out the steamed veggies and gives them to Angra* Sheepy: Bedi:…Hmm… Tell them to… Sheepy: Bedi:..would that work… Sheepy: Bedi: …Thank you… Sheepy: Bedi: You’ve actually helped me a lot. Arsé-kun: Angra: Yeah, sure, any time. And you helped more. Sheepy: Bedi: I’m happy to hear that. Arsé-kun: *Angra considers the veggies. He considers the coconuts, and it’s trees. It’s still hot. He likes his tongue not burning to a cinder.* Sheepy: Bedi: If you like it, I’ll make it for you in the future. If not, I’ll try to come up with something else. Sheepy: Bedi: My brother is a much better cook than me. Sheepy: Bedi: However…I’ll do my best! Arsé-kun: Angra: It’s not pitch black, yer already better than half the shit I’ve seen. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, that sounds accurate. Arsé-kun: *Angra goes to nom. !!! It is immediately Angra-Approved.* Sheepy: Bedi: Oh…! I’ll keep in mind that you like it! Arsé-kun: *Angra proceeds to more or less inhale the edibles. is gud* Sheepy: *Bedi finishes cleaning* Arsé-kun: *Until Angra comes over with his plate and utensils. You are not done.* Sheepy: *Bedi begins cleaning those, too* Arsé-kun: *Good man Bedivere LastName* Arsé-kun: Angra: So, uh… Now what? Arsé-kun: Angra: I’d love to fuck with somebody, but I’ll die instantly. Sheepy: Bedi: Hmm.. Sheepy: Bedi: Do you want to try going back to sleep? Arsé-kun: Angra: Should, but I’m not feeling it. Sheepy: Bedi: Hmm… Sheepy: Bedi: I was considering it myself because…what if Merlin gets lonely? Arsé-kun: Angra: Then sucks to be him. Arsé-kun: Angra: Oh, oh, I know. I can be a creepy weirdo and you can see if everyone’s doing okay. It’s Halloween, after all! Nobody is safe! Sheepy: Bedi: Oh…! Sheepy: Bedi: But wouldn’t that wake them up? Arsé-kun: Angra: What are you gonna do, jump on their bed until it breaks? Why would it? Sheepy: Bedi: Jump on their bed…? Arsé-kun: Angra: You’re not, right? So why would you wake anyone up? It’s bitch o clock am. Sheepy: Bedi: I’ve only heard of such activities in rumors…! Sheepy: Bedi: That children jump on their beds and get punished. Arsé-kun: Angra: Well, yeah. They would go flyin’ out windows, or hit the floor, or do somethin’ stupid. We’re adults, we can do what we goddamn want. Sheepy: Bedi: ….However, when I asked if Satoru partakes in such activities….he replied, “Why? What does it accomplish?” Arsé-kun: Angra: The same as other time wasters! It’s fun! Sheepy: Bedi: They meant not actual children, but manchildren! Sheepy: Bedi: You’re very knowledgeable! Arsé-kun: Angra: Real kids? Shouldn’t do it. They’ll gottdam die. And are you calling me a manchildren?? Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Sheepy: Bedi: *he tilts his head* Huh? Arsé-kun: Angra: *he tilts his in response* Huh? Do we think better when we tilt? Sheepy: Bedi: Well, I thought you were like Andersen. Sheepy: Bedi: You gave me “old man in a child’s body” vibes, but not the way Satoru does. Arsé-kun: Angra: I mean, I was pretty old when I finally died! Does that count? Sheepy: Bedi: Oh! So was… Sheepy: Bedi:….I? Sheepy: Bedi:…… Sheepy: Bedi:…..??? Arsé-kun: Angra: Should I be calling you old man, then?? Sheepy: Bedi: I didn’t actually die….I kind of was just …sent to the void? Arsé-kun: Angra: I’d say lucky you, but can’t share the feeling! Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, it’s quite unnatural. Sheepy: Bedi: I wouldn’t expect anyone to relate. Arsé-kun: Angra: That’s why yer lucky, but whatever. Sheepy: Bedi: Oh. Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose I might be lucky in some people’s eyes in that respect. Arsé-kun: Angra: *he sorta shrugs* Sheepy: Bedi: Anyway…um… Sheepy: Bedi: What now? Arsé-kun: Angra: I dunno. What do you fancy pantsy knights do, anyway? Sheepy: Bedi: Whatever my king asks of me. Sheepy: Bedi: Other than that… Sheepy: Bedi: We spend time together, train ourselves, spar, or do what we need in order to live. Sheepy: Bedi: A bond between your fellow knights is incredibly important. Sheepy: Bedi: It’ll be what saves you. Sheepy: Bedi: We also sightsee…but if you mean now… Sheepy: Bedi:…Unfortunately, I think Sir Lancelot and Sir Tristan mope all the time with very few breaks, Sir Gawain is a skirt chaser, and I spend most of my time by Merlin’s side. Arsé-kun: Angra: Yeah, I noticed. It’s a good source of food for me. Sheepy: Bedi: Lucan hasn’t changed a bit other than the massive hole in his chest, Sir Kay hasn’t changed, and Griflet apparently enjoys children’s shows. Sheepy: Bedi: I would be overjoyed if all of us could come together for a party of some sort. Arsé-kun: Angra: Then have a party! Go nuts, go feral, get smashed and get “smashed”! Arsé-kun: Angra: You wanna do a thing? Do the thing! Sheepy: Bedi: *he eagerly holds his fists up in front of his chest, smiling brightly* I’ll “go feral”! Arsé-kun: Angra: Wait wait wait hold on wait *this is not the reply he expected At All* Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Arsé-kun: *And poor Angra now has to explain EXACTLY what “Going feral” means. He throws Sicko Mode in for a bonus* Sheepy: Bedi:….I don’t really understand, so I’ll just ask Merlin Arsé-kun: Angra: Oh my gggghh.. It means you act like a nutcase wild animal! Go nuts! Go crazy! Same thing! Please don’t actually use it, I might be murdered for it! Sheepy: Bedi: Oh… Sheepy: Bedi: I’ll avoid it. Arsé-kun: Angra: Lobo going on a murder spree is going feral. Me drinking a keg of beer and committing a crime is going feral. You’re a goodie two shoes, you avoid that. Sheepy: Bedi: I see. Sheepy: Bedi: But… Sheepy: Bedi: Isn’t it “Goodie two snooze”? Sheepy: Bedi: Lucan says that a goodie two snooze is someone who’s good at droning on to the point that you get in two naps before they’re done. Sheepy: Bedi: And that any similar phrases are wrong and I should question them. Arsé-kun: Angra: Eh? A liar? Lemme beat him up and die for my transgressions. Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Arsé-kun: Angra: Never mind! *he decides to do it himself later this week.* Sheepy: Bedi: My brother’s very smart. Arsé-kun: Angra: Yeah, in the bad ideas and puns department. Sheepy: Bedi: For example.. Sheepy: Bedi: Did you know that alcohol was invented by someone named Alfred Kay Hole? But his friends would call him Al for short. Sheepy: Bedi: He told me that. Arsé-kun: Angra: Did he? Hmm! Sheepy: Bedi: I hadn’t heard it before. He’s very knowledgeable! Arsé-kun: Angra: He must be, to know such weird stuff. Sheepy: Bedi: Yes, exactly Sheepy: Bedi: He loves teaching me these things, too. Sheepy: Bedi: And spreading the word. He tells me to share my newfound knowledge whenever I can. Arsé-kun: Angra: Maaan.. *does he tell Bedi? Does he not? Which is the more evil of the two? And which keeps him fed?* … Arsé-kun: Angra: You know he’s fuckin’ with you, right? Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Sheepy: Bedi: Oh, people tell me this often. Arsé-kun: Angra: Al Kay Hole? Alcohol? He’s messing with you. Sheepy: Bedi: But Lucan doesn’t lie. Arsé-kun: Angra: Also, it’s goodie two-shoes. But I might steal the other one! Sheepy: Bedi: He says that he knows a lot of facts about make up, not that they’re lies. Sheepy: Bedi:…Or is it a lot of facts that he makes up? Sheepy: Bedi: Either way, he knows a lot of facts! Arsé-kun: Angra: Both? But these sound like bullshit to me, and I know bullshit! I speak it fluently! He’s makin’ shit up and watchin’ you embarrass yourself! What a dickkk! Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Sheepy: Bedi: Hmmmm…but… Sheepy: Bedi: *he tilts his head* … Arsé-kun: Angra: Whaaaat an asshollle! A whole douché de pas! Arsé-kun: Angra: And the entire asshole ballet! Sheepy: Bedi: So then… Sheepy: Bedi: Eggnog isn’t an alcoholic beverage for chickens? Arsé-kun: Angra: Nope! Sheepy: Bedi: And Santa doesn’t put people down on his naughty list permanently if they forget to bake cookies for him? Arsé-kun: Angra: Nooope! The Krampus might consider it though! Sheepy: Bedi: Lucan said he was giving his gifts to me because he felt bad for me and was taking the coal… Sheepy: Bedi: He even put my name on in advance… Arsé-kun: Angra: … IS regifting a sin? *thinking emoji* Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Arsé-kun: Angra: The answer issss! Ittttttt’s not! Sheepy: Bedi:….!? Sheepy: Bedi: And the Easter bunny doesn’t eat people whose hair makes people think of bunnies!? Arsé-kun: Angra: It’s a rabbit! Why would he eat people? He’s not the beast! Sheepy: Bedi:…Because he’s hungry after laying eggs. Sheepy: Bedi: But he eats other rabbits for fuel. Sheepy: Bedi: His vision isn’t very good so he mistakes people with hairstyles like mine for rabbits. Arsé-kun: Angra: That’s the dumbest thing I’ve heard tonight! I love it. I’m going to scare children with it next year. Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Arsé-kun: Angra: That’s dumb. Hi, I’m your villain for the evening and you’re kinda naive, ain'tcha? Arsé-kun: Angra: A bit dumb in the upstairs? A little too trusting of man? Like okay, Spenta, we get it, you’re the nicest guy in the world, but yer kind of an idiot? Arsé-kun: Angra: You a doormat or a man? Ch-ch-check yaself 'fore ya wreck yaself! Arsé-kun: *Angra attempts an airhorn noise, but not too loudly. bewww bewbewbewbewwww* Arsé-kun: Angra: Anyway if you hold him down, I’ll kick him in the taint for ya. Sheepy: Bedi: Huh? Sheepy: Bedi: Isn’t it better to be trusting than to constantly question whether something is a lie? Sheepy: Bedi: My brother wouldn’t have any reason to lie to me, would he? Sheepy: Bedi: And….a doormat, hm. Sheepy: Bedi: I wonder if I am one….I wonder… I’ll ask Merlin about what you’re saying. Arsé-kun: Angra: Easy answer. For his own amusement! People can be diiiiicks! Sheepy: Bedi:?! Sheepy: Bedi: Wh…what!? Arsé-kun: Angra: Surprise! Sheepy: Bedi: But…! Sheepy: Bedi: I can’t believe this… Sheepy: Bedi:….I need to ask Merlin about this… Arsé-kun: Angra: Yeaaah, probs a good idea. Believin’ the shit I say might not always be good! Sheepy: Bedi: I suppose so. Sheepy: Bedi: I have a lot to think about… (CONTINUED IN 14.5)

#14 #fate goes au

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