#even though he wishes he could believe it b/c it sucks his beloved is gone

[queenlua]

What began as a friendship between Ann and Abraham [Lincoln] turned at some point into romance. They shared an understanding, according to friends, that they would marry after Ann completed her studies at the Female Academy in Jacksonville. Ann was only twenty-two in the summer of 1835. While New Salem sweltered through one of the hottest summers in the history of the state, a deadly fever, possibly typhoid, spread through the town. Ann, as well as several of Lincoln's friends, perished in the epidemic. After Ann's death, Abraham seemed "indifferent, to transpiring events," one neighbor recalled, "had but Little to say, but would take his gun and wander off in the woods by him self." Elizabeth Abell, a New Salem neighbor who had become a surrogate mother to Lincoln, claimed she had "never seen a man mourn for a companion than he did." His melancholy deepened on dark and gloomy days, for he could never "be reconcile[d]," he said, "to have the snow—rains and storms to beat on her grave." Acquaintances feared that he had become "temporarily deranged," and that unless he pulled himself together, "reason would desert her throne."

goddamn. fuckin bleak period in mr sixteenth president's life

#def getting the vibe he almost didn't make it that far! #also: in the tags because this is far too embarrassing and dweeby of commentary for the main post BUT #okay you know how e.g. wolverine xmen has that thing going on where like #EVERY girl he ever meets dies tragically. usually after they date and/or fuck #which is very appealing if you're into manpain but even so once you read the xmen wiki article and discover he's got like FIVE dead exes #it's like okay come on no one's life is THAT sad #dude. lincoln's early life. is that sad #super close to his mom/sister/first-beloved #all of whom die horribly #and like admittedly horrible death was not that uncommon back then #childbirth/typhoid/etc was a hell of a thing #but they're also like. the only ppl who appreciate his intellectual habits etc etc it's just #super heavy dude #then the next passage in the book goes on about how Lincoln said he was sure there wasn't life after death #even though he wishes he could believe it b/c it sucks his beloved is gone #and it's just like BRUH DUDE #anyway. lincoln. #lua reads team of rivals