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#every shot of thrawn was of him standing in the same exact spot on this platform/ship thing. EVERY SHOT
smlbirdds · 7 months
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not a fan of how the ahsoka show was handled whatsoever :/
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More Than Sufficient: Part 2
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Grand Admiral Thrawn x Reader, Gender Neutral
AO3 Link/ Support Me on Ko-fi
Part 1
Summary: Your relationship with Grand Admiral Thrawn leaves many things left unsaid.  But, when a mission goes awry, certain truths are bound to come out.
A/N: Hey, remember when I said I finished this six months ago? Well, I lied.  But it’s finished now.  Enjoy.
Word Count: 2.9K
           You woke up stiff and in considerable pain.  Not intolerable, but enough to leave you incapable of moving your shoulders more than an inch off the mattress before tumbling back down again.
            “Welcome back Captain,” a mechanical voice chimed.
            You turned to see the medical droid beside you, taking notes of your vitals.
            “How long have I been away?” you asked, dryly.
            “Approximately three days, one hour, and 37 minutes,” it answered efficiently.  “The Grand Admiral insisted I keep track.”
            You blinked in surprise.  Perhaps you had underestimated just how much blood you lost during the fight.  Suddenly the pain in your shoulders didn’t seem so bad.
            “I was also told in inform Grand Admiral Thrawn the moment you were conscious.  He is on his way here now.”
            Your stomach tightened. The image of Thrawn hovering over you with softened red eyes as he called your name flooded your mind. A part of you wanted to savor the moment, to hold it close to your heart and never let it go. But, you couldn’t.  It was wrong. You weren’t supposed to remember.  It was too vulnerable, too intimate.  The Thrawn you had come to know would never wish you to see that side of him.  You only hoped he didn’t know you had.
            With a great effort, you pushed yourself fully upright.
            “Captain,” the droid protested.  “I must insist you lay back down.”
            You ignored it, pulling your feet over the side.  You needed to get to your quarters.  You needed to change and face Thrawn standing on your own two feet. You were too vulnerable here to properly lie to him.
            Taking a breath, you stood.  Your vision swam for a moment, but to your relief you stayed upright.  Keeping your head up, you started walking.
            “If you could tell me where my uniform is.”
            The droid bristled, replying with more insistent, “Captain, I really must…”
            You stopped listening and pulled back one of the curtains.  On a chair was a uniform, clean and pressed, with a pair of boots beside it.  Without another word, you started to dress.
            It was slow work.  The pants were the easiest.  Your legs were covered in light bruises, but the steady throbbing in your shoulders made it easy to ignore.  Your boots were next, bringing on the same manageable ache.  It was your shirt which was the real problem.
           You couldn’t raise your arms without a searing pain shooting down from your shoulders.  It took every ounce of effort not to vocalize the discomfort. The moment you did, you knew the medical droid would go running to Thrawn themselves. Slowly, painfully, and through sheer force of will you shimmed and strained to get your undershirt over your head and your arms through the sleeves.  The effort left you sore with sweat dripping on your brow.  Looking down at the button up shirt and uniform jacket still on the chair took all the life out of you.  There was no way you could finish, but you could hardly leave the med bay half dressed.  You started calculating the likelihood of making it to your quarters in this state without being spotted when you heard the doors swish open and shut followed by a pair of precise footsteps.
            “Grand Admiral Thrawn,” the droid greeted.
            “Where is Captain Y/N?” His tone was decidedly measured.  To any who did not know him, he would have sounded perfectly collected, but to your ears, he might as well had shouted the words. 
            “Here, sir,” you said, keeping your voice in a neutral calm despite your racing heart. This confrontation was inevitable, but you could at least gain a few more minutes before looking into those eyes again.  “I understood you were coming to meet me.  I wanted to make myself presentable.”
            There was a pause.  You could practically hear the gears turning in his mind.
            “And are you?”
            “Not quite sir,” you said. “It will take me a few more minutes to be properly dressed.  If you would like to delay this meeting until later--”
            “If you are capable of getting out of the hospital bed and speaking, then I see no reason no reason for delay.  Please, don’t let my presence stop you.”
            This was a trap.  It had to be, but there was nothing for you to do.  Slowly you grabbed your shirt off the chair.
            “Why did you wish to see me, sir?”
            “I wanted to make sure you were well,” he answered, smoothly. “I’m sure the medical droid has told you how long you’ve been unconscious as well as the injuries you sustained.”
           “They have.”
           “Then you would understand my…concern.”
            You stopped. Despite knowing better, your heart sunk heavy in your chest. Yes, concern was the appropriate word to use; professional, polite, impersonal.  The exact opposite of the gentle tone in which he had called your name.
            You shook your head in a vain attempt to clear your mind.  You needed to get out of the medical bay.  You needed to think.
            “You needn’t, sir,” you said. “I—Ah!”
            A sharp pain shot straight through your shoulders as you moved your arm too quickly through your sleeve.  Before you knew what was happening, the curtain was drawn back and Thrawn was by your side.
            “Easy, Captain.”
            You didn’t respond and allowed him to guide you towards the bed without protest.
            You could only imagine what you looked like in that moment.  Half-dressed with one arm through your sleeve, sweat on your brow and most likely pale from blood loss.  You inwardly cursed yourself for not just staying down.  At least then you would have some dignity.
            Thrawn for his part didn’t say a word.  
            With practiced care, he placed his hand under your bare arm and lifted it before guiding it through your other sleeve. 
            You hissed in pain, but it wasn’t nearly as bad as trying to do it yourself.
            He then stepped away, allowing you to button the rest of your shirt.  You couldn’t quite get the last few buttons, but it hardly mattered anymore.
            You waited for an order, a reprimand, anything, but there was only silence.
            Just as the tension was growing to be too much, Thrawn finally spoke.
            “Is there a reason you decided to unnecessarily strain yourself?”
            You took a breath, still unable to meet his eyes. “As I told you sir, I wanted to make myself presentable.  It seems I overestimated my abilities.”
            “Don’t lie to me Captain, it doesn’t suit you.”
            The words were said in his usual cool demeanor, but they held a hidden bite which made you wince.
            “My apologizes. I only meant that…”  Your mind raced trying to find a lie with just enough truth to make it easier to swallow.
            “I did not wish you to see me in such a state,” you answered. “Laid out half dead in medbay is hardly an image befitting a Captain of the Chimera.”
            You met his gaze then.  His eyes were just an intense as you expected them to be and even more unreadable. You might as well had been staring into an open flame.
            “It was a foolish notion,” he said.  The bite was still there, but not nearly as potent.
            “I understand that now,” you admitted. “But I needed to at least attempt to spare my pride.”
            “And did you succeed?”
            “I suppose that’s up to you, sir.”
            Thrawn paused. His lips pressed into a line. “It was merely bruised, not permanently damaged.”
            You couldn’t stop your own lip from quirking upward at the words.  “Thank you, sir.” 
            There was a flash then.  A glimmer of a smile in his red eyes.  It only lasted a moment, hardly a blink.  But you saw it. One more moment to tuck away in your heart.
            You straightened up as best you could, squaring your shoulders and holding your chin high. “Now, if I may ask for the final mission report.”
            Thrawn inclined his head in acknowledgement. Whatever tension remained in the air disappeared. The status quo was back in place.
            “We were able to bring back two of the rebels alive,” he said. “After some interrogation, they confirmed what the ringleader told us.  Fulcrum was in fact on the planet with the ultimate goal to disrupt the mining operation posted there.  We were able to stop their plan, but Fulcrum escaped along with the rest of the rebels.”
            You nodded.  “What was being mined?”
            “I’m afraid it’s classified,” Thrawn answered. “Apparently its contents are highly sensitive.  Even I was unauthorize to examine them.”
            You frowned. What could they possibly be carrying if even a Grand Admiral could not be privy to such information?
            “I have some ideas on the matter,” he said, as if reading your thoughts.  “But, I do not wish to delve into further speculation without more data.”
            You wanted to ask him what his initial thoughts were, but there was nothing for it.  The subject was now closed until further notice.
            “Understood, sir.” 
            There was another pause.  You waited patiently for another bought of information or a dismissal, but neither came.  Thrawn stood perfectly still, incomprehensible and more than a little distant.  Whatever he saw in those red orbs were truly for his eyes only.
            “Is there something else, sir,” you prompted.
            “Yes,” he said, coming back to reality so smoothly you questioned if he ever left. “I wanted to apologize.”
            You blinked. “Sir?”
            “For jeopardizing the mission and for your injuries,” he clarified. “It was my presence on the planet which prompted the attack.  You instructed me to stay behind and I disregarded your warning. The end result was the escape of Fulcrum and the rest of the rebel forces along with the near death of one of my best officers.  It was my decision alone, and I apologize.”
            “Admiral, I…” You floundered.  Thrawn? Grand Admiral Thrawn, apologize? To you? Every sentence required a response. He thought of you as one of his best officers? You wanted to say so many things, but everything scrambled together until all you could say was, “It wasn’t your fault.”
            He inclined his head all while giving you a subtly doubtful look. “Thank you for your words, Captain, but I fail to see how.”
            “The rebels already knew I was coming,” you countered, easily. “Best case scenario I would have been captured and interrogated. Just as likely, the ringleader would have shot me for annoying him. Neither scenario ends with me safely back aboard the Chimera.  And both end with the rebels achieving their goal and walking free.”
            “You could have escaped,” Thrawn offered.  “Given your capabilities, it is just as likely you would have discovered the rebel’s plan and found a way to contact the ship without falling into their hands.”
            “I appreciate your faith in my abilities. But it doesn’t stop the notion from being pure speculation.”
            “It is hardly speculation or faith, for that matter.  It is a statement of observable fact. Your abilities would not allow for anything less.”
He held you gaze as if to make certain you understood the sincerity of his words.
            Your breath caught in your throat. If Thrawn noticed, he made no mention of it.
            “All the more reason I should have trusted you with my true purpose in accompanying you,” he said.
            You shook your head.  “No.  How could you tell me about something you weren’t even certain was real? My mission was to collect information on the rebels.  If you had told me your suspicions, it would have obstructed my view of the facts presented to me. I will not deny I was a little displeased when I realized you knew more than you initially let on, but I understand why.  Truly.”
            He didn’t say anything for a long moment, taking the time to scan your features. 
            Your mind brought you back to your first meeting. You kept still and allowed him to conduct his examination without hinderance. 
            “Yes, I suppose you do.”
            His tone was soft, reflecting the moments you were trying so desperately to keep buried your mind and out of your heart.  Heat rose in your cheeks and in your ears. You couldn’t explain how you managed to hold his gaze.
            “May I make an inquiry, Captain?” he asked.
            “Of course, sir.”
            “What do you remember of the moments before you became unconscious?”
            Your breath caught in your throat, but you managed to keep it off your face. “Nothing, sir.”
            His eyes narrowed then, and his head tilted to one side. “Nothing at all?”
            Blood was now rushing to your ears.  You gripped the bed to keep your hands from shaking, but you shouldn’t have bothered.  He could see it all; every involuntary twitch, every sharp breath there was no hiding from him now.
            “Sir—"
            “Captain.” Clean, precise, and a reminder of the uselessness of lying.
           “I saw nothing of importance to the mission,” you said, carefully.
            “Meaning you observed something else?”
            “I hardly know.”
            “Do you doubt your senses?” he pressed.
            “No, I…”  You took a breath.  No half lies.  There was no longer a point.  He was determined for a straight answer, and frankly, you were just too tired.
            “I do not wish to cause you embarrassment by my own…interpretations.”
            You met his eye allowing him to look upon and examine every unspoken feeling your words could convey. 
            He took his time, as you knew he would.  You waited for the realization, a sign of embarrassment or even disgust.  But like every time before, there was nothing save for mild fascination.
            “I see,” he said. “And these interpretations, do you wish to be true?”
            “Yes.”
            He nodded. “Your worry then is that your hopes have somehow skewed the facts.”
            “Yes.”
            Again, he nodded and with careful thought, took a step closer. 
            He stood tall before you.  Your eyes met his chest due to the height of the bed.  This was becoming too much.  He knew how this affected you. He had to.
            It was then you felt it; a simple touch.  His fingers gently traced he outline of your jaw almost a whisper against your skin until coming to your chin.  With a simple ounce of pressure, he tilted your face up to his.
            “Then allow me to clarity,” he said. 
            And with that, he kissed you. 
            His lips were softer than you anticipated, his touch careful and deliberate as everything else he did.  It was easy to give in, as you closed you eyes to the sensation. There was no hesitation, or a question being asked, but a tenderness you didn’t think Thrawn was capable of.
            Slowly he pulled away, leaving you content and just a little dizzy.  You blinked your eyes back open to find his glowing red one staring back at you.
            “Was that a sufficient explanation, Captain,” he asked.
            A small smile twitched at the corner of your mouth. “More than sufficient sir,” you said.  “However, I may require you to go into slightly more detail.”
            There was no denying the humor in his eyes now, as an almost relieved smile came to his features.
            “Gladly,” he said before kissing you one more.
            There was something different about his kiss.  The precise calculation was gone replaced with something warm and spontaneous.  You met him with enthusiasm as your hands wandered between his chest and neck. You thrilled as he took a sharp take of breath when you fingers curled around the hair at the base of his neck.  He wanted you.  Thrawn wanted you.
            He kissed you deeper then, parting your lips with a groan of satisfaction. His hands fell securely at your waist, pulling you close as he found a natural spot in between your legs.
            You weren’t sure even if he knew where this was going, but you eager to find out.
           “Grand Admiral, you’re needed--oh! Sorry sir.”
            You broke away to see Commander Vanto standing in the doorway keeping his eyes on a very interesting part of the ceiling.
            Your stomach turned with embarrassment.  Unable to think of anything else to do, you hid your face in Thrawn’s chest.
            Thrawn, for his part, kept perfectly still not even bothering to release his hold of you.
            “Did you need something Commander?” he said, the irritation evident in his voice.
           “You’re needed on the bridge,” Vanto said, still not having it in him to look at either of you.  “Message from command.”
            Thrawn nodded, before turning his attention to you.  
            You looked up to him.  His face was calm, if not a little irritated, but his gaze was gentle.  It felt odd to see on such a sever face, but not unwelcome. You wondered idly if it was a look you would have to get used to; it was a lovely thought.
            He then took your hand, and raised it to his lips, pressing a kiss into the palm.
            “Rest well Captain,” he said. “I have a feeling we’ll need you back on the bridge sooner rather than later.”
            “Understood sir.”
            He gave a small smile of approval and with some reluctance, stepped away.
            You watched him go, briefly meeting the Commander’s eyes as you did.
            Vanto said nothing to you, but his expression made his feelings clear; mild embarrassment, but no ill will.  He gave you a small nod, which you returned.
            “Commander Vanto,” Thrawn said, as the pair of them walked out the door. “I would appreciate…”
            “Nobody will hear it from me,” Eli assured.
            They left then leaving the remainder of their conversation to themselves.
            You sat alone with only the mild hum of the ships engine to break the silence. You weren’t sure what to do, what to think.  Involuntarily, you cupped the hand Thrawn had kissed with the other, still tingling from the touch.  You brought it to your lips and a smile spread across your face until you let out a surprised bought of laughter.
            More than sufficient indeed
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