#for the tags mostly djfkdl

[dandyshucks]

i think it is a little bit funny (not necessarily haha funny but like a "huh. thats something." sort of funny) that the two main F/Os of mine (Guz and Julian) both have abusive parents fnfkdl like ,,, idk i guess like attracts like but ough theres something about that that makes me feel a little bit "this probably says too much about me" dbdkdkl (also the mk system,, and one could make an argument for the celestial robots too tbh with how theyre treated at the company djdksl)

#its been a day fhdksl #my mother is getting into some stuff that rly fucks w my brain and easily sets off psychosis symptoms so im ... ack! #im trying very hard to keep those thinking patterns out of reach and keep myself tethered but hough its gonna be a bit interesting here #the difficult thing w this is that it is impossible to disprove a lot of the thoughts and beliefs that come into play with these topics #not that arguing with delusions does any good generally speaking (and only harms usually) but ... argh ! frustrating ! #and by beliefs i mean delusions here. i do not want to argue with spiritual/religious beliefs djdksl esp if theyre not hurting anyone #i want to argue with my shitty brain trying to convince me that [redacted] is true (not going to say just in case it sets other ppl off) #and then when u throw double bookkeeping into the mix... well. now ur well and truly fucked djdkdl #ANYWAYS. it is struggle momence over here now eeyikes! #the comforting thought ''my f/o would understand my situation and would have their own experiences to draw from to know how to comfort me'' #(and i could comfort them when they struggle w flashbacks or triggers or just plain and simple difficult days) #i would never want anyone to go thru this bc it is absolute hell and nobody should ever experience this. but... #there is comfort in knowing somebody else Understands bc they've been thru it too (or similar enough that they get it) #abuse tw #vent // #for the tags mostly djfkdl #dandy.cmd