#half of my dad thinks im faking it (which my brain keeps latching onto bc it tries to tell me i'm fine when i

[segernatural]

hmm

#we're coming up on three straight weeks of spontaneous nerve pain my friends #doctors dont know whats wrong & all i can say is thank fuck i've got a real person job with benefits & live in a country w/ free healthcare #i dont even know how to explain it. i've been on meds helping the pain finally. #and only noticed they were working once they wore off and it legitimately felt like i was dying again. i hope you never know this pain #my bodys exhausted i'm exhausted even though the pain is being managed. my body is still firing all the nerves i just cant feel it anymore #i sit in bed all day and cant focus cant think cant type accurately. holding my phone hurts. but im so exhausted. i shouldnt be but i am #it occurred to me the other day that. this might not just stop. its been almost 3 weeks theres no reason to think itll just stop #and thats fucking scary. im 2* and i know age isnt correlated with health but. i shouldnt be. i dont know. im young & healthy & so confused #i just want to know whats wrong. i just want the pain to stop. the sensations to stop. #im stuck at home because thats where i should be with ease of emergency rooms but. my family is driving me crazy #half of my dad thinks im faking it (which my brain keeps latching onto bc it tries to tell me i'm fine when i #am so clearly not fine.) #char speaks