#happy birthday lexi i hope you have an amazing day :pleading: | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

axwalker · 3 years

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Happy Birthday, Maskaneko! A Tears in Heaven one-shot.

The beautiful edit in the moodboard was made by the talented, creative birthday girl @mskaneko 💕💕💕

Happy birthday again!!! As I said earlier, I’m so grateful to have you in my life. I hope you’ll spend an amazing day.

I love youuu ❤️❤️❤️ @mskaneko

You said you’d be happy with a peek into Drake and Lexie’s life in Tears in Heaven. So here it is. I hope you’ll enjoy it. 🎉🎉🎉

Warnings: Mention of the death of a child, grief. Language and smut.

It’s been a tough year. Lexie and I have been working hard, and between our demanding jobs and Lennie, we’re exhausted. It’s a miracle we were both able to clear our schedules for a few days to come to Corsica to Max’s and Rashad’s house for a short vacation. We need this much more than we’re able to admit. I miss my time with Lexie. I need more of her. If there is one thing I can admit to myself, it’s that. That there is nothing more fundamental, more important to my happiness, than my wife and my little girl.

A roar of laughter interrupts my thoughts. I look through the window, and I can’t help but smile at the sight down by the shore. Jaiden is chasing Lena to the edge of the ocean, and every time the water splashes up on her little legs, she squeals and runs back, her face animated with some mix of terror and delight.

A throaty laugh harmonizes with my squirt’s high-pitched giggles, and Lexie walks into view. Her dark hair is scooped up into a messy bun, and she’s all long, sun-kissed legs and rounded baby-belly in her orange bikini. It will never get old, how my heart thumps a little harder when I see her. Desperate to get to her. I leave the home office and walk barefoot and bare-chested over to the windows and sliding door. Lexie and I wasted too many years and made too many mistakes before we came together again. We both had a lot of growing up to do, a lot of pain to overcome but seeing her with our little girl and Maxwell’s boy chasing the waves, seeing her pregnant again, this good life was worth all the patience in the world. She is worth the wait. I press my palm to the cool glass and let years of memories wash over me, all the painful years spent apart. Being with my family always provides perspective. I might feel exhausted sometimes, but my heart, my life is whole. The axis of my existence it’s those two people down there playing in the ocean like they don’t have a care in the world. Seeing that lifts my burdens, too. And it reminds me that we can’t let life interfere with our lives as a family. Work can’t take so much room in our lives, is not who we are.

After turning my laptop off, I cross over to the sliding door, slipping out and not bothering with anything other than the blue shorts I’m already wearing. Lexie is laughing as Lena tries to lift Jaiden and they both collapse into the water. I walk toward them, silent until I’m close, and then run past Lexie, playfully slapping her ass. She squeaks, jumping a little, her face lighting up when she sees me.

“Where’d you come from?” She laughs. I back my way into the cool waves and wink at her as an answer before turning to scoop up both Lena and Jai, one under each arm. “Daddy!” my girl screams in her sweet voice. I keep running until the ocean stirs around my waist and dunk them both to the neck, making sure to keep their heads out of the water. Their giggles and squeaks occupy the next five minutes of what suddenly feels like a perfect day.

“Uncle Dake,” Jai says. “Put me up on your shoulders.” Lexie takes Helena so I can lift Jaiden. The heels of his little feet kick against my chest, and he squeezes my neck as we go deeper into the water.

“I can swim, Mom,” Lena says from behind us. “Put me down.”

Lena’s five, and while she still likes me to toss her around, she doesn’t tolerate it from her smaller mother all that much. I’m not crazy about it either, considering Lexie’s six months pregnant.

“It’s deeper than you think, Lennie,” Lexie says. “I don’t think it is a good idea.”

Alexis and I went back to therapy when Helena turned three. Slowly, almost without noticing it, we were turning into overprotective, smothering parents. Lexie refused to go anywhere without her, and she’d have horrible panic attacks when her work forced her to travel. Therapy certainly helped a lot, but as much as I would love to say that it was like turning on a switch, that we don’t suffocate Lena anymore, it would be a lie. We would never be those two carefree parents we were ten years ago. But we’re trying; we both want our kids to have the best possible life.

After begging a little more, Lexie gives in, and sure enough, in seconds, Lennie is swimming past me, her skinny arms and legs slicing through the waves, her hair in two small braids.

“Baby, that’s fair enough,” I call out. The ocean isn’t turbulent today, but I don’t want to take any chances. It can change fast. Calm one second and treacherous the next. Lena turns, doggy paddling to stay afloat, her cute face wet and frowning.

“But, Daddy—”

“Do I repeat myself, Lena?” She frowns the brown eyes so like Lexie’s widening. She shakes her head.

“No, sir.”

“Then that’s far enough.” I gentle my words with a smile, take the few steps separating us and tap her head with Jaiden’s foot. She giggles and swims a circle around me, disappearing for a second underwater and then popping back up, laughing again.

“I need to learn that trick,” Lexie says wryly. “I tried last week, asked her if I repeat myself, and she just stared at me and said, ‘What’d you say, Mommy?’”

I can’t help it, I laugh, and Lexie glares at me.

“You know she loves pressing your buttons. Every time she finds a new one, she just has to push.”

“Looking forward to her teenage years.” I pull her close, anchoring Jaiden by one leg and looping an arm around her, cupping her stomach.

“If she’s as sassy as you, baby. I’m not looking forward to them either.” Lexie leans her head on my shoulder, covering my hand with hers on her stomach. There’s a subtle movement beneath my fingers.

“Lexie,” I breathe. “Did you feel that? They’re moving.” Of course, she felt it. It’s her body, but she just laughs. It’s not the first time the twins have moved, but I always seem to miss it, so it’s the first time I’ve felt the life growing inside Lexie for myself.

“One of them is moving.” She guides my hand to the other side of her stomach. “This guy has been quiet all day.”

“Guy?” I raise one questioning brow. “I thought we agreed we wouldn’t find out. You got some divination powers I know nothing about?”

She shrugs. “I just have a feeling they’re both guys. God save me. Lennie and I will be outnumbered.”

I chuckle “You hear that, Lennie? Your mom says we’re getting two boys. What do you think?”

“I want sisters! Boys are yucky.” Jaiden jumps to the water, and they start a water war.

“You heard the girl,” I tell Lexie. “Boys are yucky. I sure hope she’ll think like that for a long time.”

Lexie laughs. “I honestly don’t care.” She grimaces and rubs the small of her back. “I’m so big this time, I just want them out . I’ve already gained as much weight as I had by the end with Lena. I’m huge.”

I lean over to whisper in her ear. “You’re sexy as hell, Lexie. Always.”

She turns her head so our mouths are mere inches apart, our lips separated by a single breath. “You think so, huh?”

“I’ll show you tonight,” I whisper over her mouth.

“Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!” Jaiden chants. We glance down at our godson, and both laugh.

“You kiss all the time,” Lena mutters from a few feet away. She’s not wrong, but in my defense, her mother is irresistible.

“Lena, we need to get back inside,” Lexie says. “We’ve been in the water all day, and you need your lunch. I bet Max made the grill sandwiches you love so much. After lunch, we can get ice cream from Amorino.”

“A few more minutes, Mommy, please? So, Daddy can swim with me?” Lena asks, lips pouty and huge eyes pleading. If she figures out, she has me wrapped around her little finger, we’re doomed. Who am I kidding? The girl was born knowing. “You think you can keep up with me? Okay squirt. Let’s go.”

After a while, we get out of the water and join the others for lunch in the terrace. Lena claps and rocks her shoulders, some little move she and Jaiden made up. The two are thick as thieves. Jaiden’s at our house as much as Lena is at Rash and Maxwell’s.

“What’s that you’re drawing, Lennie?” Liv asks. She might not like kids, but she sure is crazy about her goddaughter.

“It’s us!” Lena grins.

“Let me see.” I reach for the paper. Lexie walks up beside me and looks down at the drawing in my hand. It’s a man-stick figure with which I assume is a stethoscope around his neck, obviously me. A shorter woman-stick she’s colored caramel and who has brown lines drawn around her shoulders for hair. Jaiden made Lexie’s stomach a circle and there’s two orange round things inside.

“Grapefruit,” Lennie says. “Mommy said the babies are like grapefruits now.”

“Ahhhh.” Lexie purses her lips against a smile. “You got them perfectly, baby.”

In her drawing, she is standing between Lexie and me, holding our hands. I tilt my head, staring at what Lena’s holding in the drawing. A white bird?

“What’s that white thing your holding, squirt?”

“It’s Tom!” She says, her smile wide and proud. “He’s an angel, like mommy said.” Tom’s name, said so unexpectedly, causes the adults on the terrace to hold their breaths collectively. Lexie goes perfectly still beside me, and her hand goes instinctively to her stomach. That old fear lives in the back of both our minds. As much as losing Tom still hurts, we talk openly about him to our daughter, making sure she knows she has a big brother looking out for her all the time, even though she never met him.

“You can have it, Mommy,” Lena offers, her beautiful smile slipping, his childish intuition sharp enough to pick up on the shift of mood in the terrace. “I-I drew it for you, so we can put it in the twins’ nursery.”

“It’s so good, Lennie. That’s a great idea,” I say, glancing at Lexie, who stares down at the paper. Even though she isn’t crying, her eyes have that look of shattered glass she sometimes gets when she thinks of Tom. Unfortunately, therapy doesn’t eradicate pain. Not for the first time, I wish I could carry it for her, but I can’t.

“This is your most beautiful drawing yet, Lennie,” Lexie says after clearing her voice, reaching down to caress the angel on it. “I love it very, very much. It will look perfect in their room.” She bends to kiss her hair, closes her eyes tightly and then cups Helena’s little head and kisses her forehead, too. She clears her throat and pulls back to spread an overbright smile and says, “Who’s ready for ice cream?”

ALEXIS

Accident. That’s how everybody described what happened to my baby boy. An accident. It does hurt less than it used to. At first, I couldn’t think about Tom without aching and falling into a black hole. Five horrible years, where I needed to numb myself or ignore my pain to keep breathing. An empty shell that had trouble breathing. I would cringe at the sound of Tom’s name, incapable of pronouncing it myself. Not because I didn’t want to hear it, but because I wanted to hold him so badly. It’s been years, but my body perfectly recalls the sweet little weight of him in my arms. His scent still fills my nostrils if I draw a deep enough breath. I remember the dark tangle of curls brushing against my cheek. His little voice calling me mommy. Some days my head and thoughts are locked in a room with those last memories, and I don’t want to leave because he’s still there. As difficult as that day was, in that memory, he’s still there. But life goes on. It has moved on, and I’m a baby two and three. I’m years into a marriage full of love I spent five years thinking wasn’t even possible.

“You okay?” I glance up from the table, from Lenna’s drawing, which I’ve found myself thinking about all day, to see Liv, wearing concern on her intense green eyes. The terrace is clear of dishes from tonight’s meal, and everyone’s gone to their respective corners. It’s just Livvie and me.

“I’m fine.” The concern on her face stays. “I swear; I’m fine,” I say. “Just thinking. Remembering.”

“Anything you want to talk about?” Her voice is unusually soft. Her gaze, as usual, is knowing.

“I’m all talked out. A lifetime of expensive therapy will do that to a girl. I guess I’m feeling more than thinking, but I’m good.”

“Okay. I’m here if you need me.”

“I know Liv. I don’t know how I would have done otherwise.”

“I think I will go join Maxwell for a nightcap”

“Now you’re talking.” I sigh and stand from the table, squeeze her hand. “I’m going to turn in. Take a quick bath since Drake is putting Lena to bed.”

“Alright. I’ll see you in the morning.” She gives me a wry grin. “I may even cook breakfast.”

I deadpan, and Liv chuckles. “Did I say cook? I meant order.”

I laugh. “That’s more like it. Good night, Liv,” I say, grabbing Lena’s drawing.

After just a few minutes in the bathtub, I dry off and belt a terry cloth robe over my nakedness, smiling when both babies move. “Hello, boys.” I don’t care what Drake says, I know what I feel. “I’d love for Daddy to feel both of you move. Can we make a deal that you’ll let him feel you both at some point?”

“Daddy would love that, too,” Drake says from the doorway. Leaning one shoulder into the door and wearing a white shirt, sleeves-rolled-up, he looks so attractive, my husband. His face grows more handsome the older he gets. He has that strong virility that somehow converts years into sexual magnetism. I walk over and reach up to caress his jaw, shadowed with stubble.

“You have a little gray in your beard, Mr. Walker.” I close the space between us and tip my toes to kiss him.

He grunts, closing his eyes and leaning into me, his hardness pressing into my belly. I want him so badly. The restlessness I’ve felt most of the day needs an outlet, and I know the best, most pleasurable way to get it.

“Lie down,” he says, leading me to the bed. My hand goes to the belt of my robe, but he stops me. “I want to unwrap you myself,” he says.

I lie on my back, and he hovers over me, connecting our eyes. I see desire there, yes, but concern, too.

“Drake, I’m okay,” I tell him, grabbing his hand and kissing it.

“You sure?” His dark brows form a frown. “The drawing—”

“It took me off guard.” I pull his hand into the neck of my robe, passing his palm over my nipple until it buds beneath his fingers. “But now I want you.”

He hesitates, searching my face and eyes before nodding. Our eyes meet, and beneath the desire filling his stare, a question lingers.

“Drake.” I place his hand on my stomach. “I’m fine.”

He bends to kiss my stomach, the underside of my breast. That restlessness needs attention, try to disturb my desire, but before I can allow myself to be distracted, the lights in the bedroom dim and my husband’s hands are on me. Drake opens the robe as if it’s a gift.

“Fuck baby, you’re so gorgeous.”

He lies down to spoon me, brushes my hair aside, and kisses my nape.

“You okay?” he asks. I know Drake well enough to hear the restraint he’s exercising. The restlessness caught him too, and in days like this, he needs wild, unbridled fucking, but he doesn’t want to hurt the twins or me. As many times as I reassure him, it’s hard for him to believe it’s okay to be as rough with me as we love sometimes.

“Drake, please, fuck me hard. I need it as much as you do.”

“Lexie,” he rasps, dropping his forehead against my hair. “Don’t ask. . .I can’t. . .the way I feel right now . . . I wish you knew what you do to me.”

“Show me.”

And he does; he takes me hard and rough. He fucks me into oblivion, until there’s nothing else but him and me. I’ve needed this desperately, craved the feeling that comes when we make love, when we’re like this, when we have this together, when he’s inside me.

“Fuck, Lex,” he growls. “I love you.”

Tears fill my eyes. The tears I wouldn’t allow myself earlier because Tom was years ago and I should be over it. I could hide that from myself, but I can’t hide anything from him. The tears run down my face, and they aren’t all grief or sorrow. They’re tears of gratitude for my little squirt sleeping down the hall. Tears of hope for the twins growing inside of me. Tears of happiness for the love of a man like Drake.

“God, Drake,” I sob. “I love you, I love you.”

Hours later, we lay together side to side, exhausted. All my restlessness gone, forgotten.

“Wow,” he says.

“Wow, I repeat. You have a magical dick.”

We both laugh at that, and he tickles me, making me wriggle in his arms. Suddenly, we both go still, feeling the movement in my belly at the same time. Like tiny synchronized swimmers, one of my boys moves on my left and the other on the right.

“Shit.” Drake’s gaze meets mine. “Both of them are moving. That’s. . .that’s amazing, Lex.”

“It is. I wanted you to feel that so badly. I feel them do that all the time, but I wanted . . . I’m so happy . . .” I stop, emotionally exhausted.

“Our life,” I say suddenly, toying with the hair on his chest.

“What about it?” he asks, kissing the top of my head.

I reach up to touch the flecks of gray in his stubble. “I’m so glad we met when we were young. That we will grow old together. That I’ll have a life with you. Despite all the years we spent apart. We lost so much, but now we have this life, our marriage, our kids.”

He tenderly rubs my belly. “These kids, all worth the wait. And no matter what comes, we’ll face it together.” I turn around, he pulls me tightly against his chest, and we fall asleep together.

#axwalker writes #tw mention of grief #tw mention death child #n*sfw

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bittersweetastoria · 7 years

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TASK 021

Halloween 2008. For months, little Luci had been planning and looking forward to her 13th birthday. Subsequently, also looking forward to that Halloween. Though that was merely because the two fell on the same day, as it had her whole life. She had planned out the most perfect ‘becoming a teen’ party, down to the very last little details. And she couldn’t wait for the day to finally come for her most perfect birthday party ever to happen. In her mind, it would turn out perfectly and she’d be the most popular girl in school until at least after Thanksgiving. But alas, that simply wasn’t how it went down.

Morning Halloween Day 08. Upon waking, the first thing to reach little Luci’s ears was her fathers yelling voice and the soft weeps of her mothers tears. She was used to it, yes. But that didn’t mean she liked it anymore or anyless. She hated the sounds, she hated feeling like she should hide for fear that his abuse would turn onto her next. Not that she wanted him to go after her mother more, or her brother for that matter. But she certainly didn’t want his wrath on her. Wiping a stray tear away, she got up from her perfectly pink bed and made her way to the bathroom - passing by her brother Wesley heading out as she did. Making a shh motion, she whispered good morning and continued into the bathroom.

After a little while, she was showered and ready for the day. Skirting past her now sleeping and much more peaceful father, the girl made it into the kitchen. “Hi momma.” The new teen, as of just a few hours before, spoke - reaching up to kiss her mothers cheek. Her silent way of trying to make the woman feel better after her husbands tirade. “Hi sweetpea. What would you like for breakfast, birthday girl?” Luci smiled at her mothers words and shook her head. “I just want some juice and a muffin momma. I have cupcakes today, remember? And my friends said we’d get take out for dinner before my party, so you don’t need to worry.” She assured her, taking the glass of juice her mother offered her. “I always worry. It’s part of being a mother.” The woman replied, giving a small smile before kissing the teens head and sliding the muffin basket near her. “Have a good day at school. I’ll see you this evening after work.” With that, the woman wondered off to shower while Luci dealt with breakfast quietly.

Afternoon Halloween Day 08. The day had gone by slowly. Each minute slowly ticking by to finally pass an hour. The only time things didn’t seem to be going at a snails pace, was during lunch when Luci passed out her cupcakes to her classmates and got blessed by her favorite meal being served at lunch that day. “Pizza day! Lucky me.” The blonde grinned as she got her slices, as well as whatever sides they had that didn’t seem repulsive. She got her usual bottle of tea, something she literally lived off of, and paid for it all before getting to her table. “Hey freaky birthday girl, where's the sweets?” Jacob asked as she sat down. Shaking her head, she passed the box to Cassie first. “Best friend gets first dibs, and choice for birthday girl too according to my mom.” She commented, taking a bite of pizza and opening her tea bottle. Watching as Cass got two out, she nodded for her to pass the box. “Everyone gets one! Honor system boys.” She demanded as Cassie handed the biggest and prettiest one - even marked with a star in the sprinkles - to her. “Thank you.” The blonde spoke with a smile, “No problem, birthday girl.” Her best friend replied, causing her to laugh. From then on, the day dragged until final bell rang.

Evening Halloween Day 08. As soon as school let out, the blonde and a couple of friends made their way to her place to drop their things off. The few friends had made the pact to sleep over after Luci’s party, so they all brought their stuff with them to school to do it all in one shot. “What shall we do first? Party set up or decide on dinner?” She asked as she plopped down in the lawn, leaves circling her on all sides. “Why not both at once?” Cassie suggested. To which, Luci laughed and hugged her best friend. “This is why we keep you around. All the smart ideas.” Luci commented jokingly, crawling over to the bag she’d left out in the back yard full of party supplies she’d picked out herself. “Mom said we can get the tables from the shed, just don’t mess with anything else or my dad will have everyone’s head.” She spoke, trying to play it off like a joke when it was really anything but.

In an hours time, it was all set up perfectly. Looking like something from a movie or tv show, picture perfect. Menu’s to various take out places scattered before the girls in the lawn as they weighed their options. “I’m thinking pizza.” One girl voted, “Nah, Chicken sounds better.” Another weighed in. At that point, Cassie and Lexi turned to Luci. “What’s the birthday girls vote?” Cassie asked, leaving the blonde to have to think. “How about chinese? Not very birthday-ie or Halloweenie, but I don’t care if you guys don’t. We have plenty of spooky treats for later to out number it anyways.” She spoke tucking her blonde hair back behind her ear as she got up to see if her brother was home, which he was. “Be right back, I’m gonna see if Wes will go get it once we order.” She spoke before going inside, just in time to face her already drunk father.

“What are you doing out there?!” The male demanded as she was trying to get by to her brothers room. “Excuse me.” She spoke, ignoring his words as she tried again. To which, he just cut her off once more and grabbed her arms. “Answer me damnit.” He demanded, earning a sigh from her. His grip hurt a little, but it was nothing she couldn’t handle. “We’re just hanging out dad. Thinking about what to get for my birthday dinner. Is that so bad?” She asked, her blue eyes looking up to him as Wesley came out of his room which is when their father let go of her. Immediately, She moved from the man and moved closer to her brother. “Hey! You busy? The girls and I want chinese for dinner and thought maybe you could go get it? Momma left me the money for it, you can even get something if you go get it.” She told him, hoping to convince him. Once he agreed, she headed back to the girls to figure out their order as Cassie wrote it down. Luci’s best friend had been voted to go with Wes to help him get the order right and carry everything.

Night Halloween Day 08. Hours passed and the party began. Dinner had been amazing and full of girl talk, and everything before that had been forgotten. The birthday girl was fully set on enjoying her party, no matter what and that’s exactly what she did. Snacks were had, games were played, and people had been requesting an endless loop of Halloween tunes on the radio for everyone to bop around to. All in all, it was a great party. But as most great things do, it came to an end. An abrupt one. All too soon.

“Luciana Elizabeth Donaldson, get your ass over here!” Her father yelled from the porch, causing everyone to stop and stare. All except for Luci, who stayed stalk still yes but her eyes remained down. She knew what was coming. “Luce?” Cassie nudged her, “Get everyone out of here, please.” She spoke quietly as she heard the door, then her mother's pleads for him to come inside. Just as he went to turn on the woman, Luci unfroze and sped up the steps. “Momma, Go make sure everyone leaves. Even Cassie.” The young teen pleaded, waiting until the woman was doing so before addressing the man who’d yelled at her and now had her wrist. “What?” She asked, to which he just dragged her inside to scream at her and slap her for something she hadn’t even done.

Within an hour, the party was long over and Luci’s happiness a thing of the past as she sat in her bedroom - costume a tangled mess beside her as she changed into her Halloween themed pajamas. “I hate him.” She muttered, listening as he did to her mother what he’d done to her as soon as the party was over. Only worse. With Luci, he stopped after a few slaps and some touches. With her mother, Luci knew the woman got it much worse. And did so to protect her. The young teen had learned that long ago. She didn’t like it, but she couldn’t tell her mother what to do. Once she heard the eldest Donaldson leave, slamming doors in his wake, she crept into her parents room and crawled into bed with her mother. Pulling covers up over her mom as she did. “It’s okay momma.” She tried to sooth the crying woman, wrapping her arms around her neck to hug her softly. “I’m sorry baby.” The woman mumbled, hugging her daughter back.

After that, Isabella had gotten up once she told Luci to cover her eyes and went to shower again as well as change into bed clothes. Once that was done, the pair took to the living room and closed out the night with Halloween films on the television. It’d been a good day, a fun evening, and a horrible night. But one thing was for sure.... She’d never forget her thirteenth birthday.

#task

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