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#i am listening to g*ga again (censored so it doesnt show up in search lmao) so if i start being weird. sorry lmaoooo
scalpelsister
·
1 year
Text
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#i am listening to g*ga again (censored so it doesnt show up in search lmao) so if i start being weird. sorry lmaoooo
#its time to test the theory of if her music is only palatable to me when im psychotic skfjfhkjshfkjfh
#by palatable i mean its always a bop but.
#not to overshare but both of my Big Psychotic Episodes included a l*dy g*ga phase in them. so.
#AND I KNOW im overdue for one because last fall I had a lot of prodrome symptoms like
#classically that.
#but i dont feel like ive been especially psychotic since then? so im like. hmmm.
#i know i HAVE been mood swingy though to an insane degree lmao. like put on stabilizers swingy
#idk lets see. lets test this theory of mine.
#but yall have been warned 😂
#my post
#eta. to clarify.
#my first psychotic episode and by far my worst happened at the same time as me getting into her music
#so i was. unwell about her skfjfhkjfhs
#like certifiably psych ward insane. parasocial AND delusional. i wont share more than that i was 16 and mentally ill give me a break lmao
#the second episode was. less connected to her I will admit but still relevant. thus the theory. the concern.
#it would not be. out of the question for my brain to link the two?
#and I did have a vivid hallucination today. so. again nothing definitive but it will be truly hysterical if her music ends up being like
#a psychotic episode warning sign lmao.
#throwback to that post i saw about another psychotic person whos warning sign to friends was setting g*ga as their avatar. me coded fr lmao
#like im not even distressed (yet at least) Im just amused. at the idea that this could be the case.
#i would die laughing at my brain forever if so.
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