#i'm like what else do people eat...i only vegetarian sushi and i'm still like what else do you eat when you need a delicious meal

[moregraceful]

finished my wip!!!! this might actually be the worst first draft i've written in years, BUT it's a first draft and once i shower and sleep on it i am sure i will know how to fix it...robo down as catastrophic as roope but we 😤 stay 😤 silly 😤

;;

FIFA turns into take-out, the two of them crowded against a table in Jason’s kitchen designed for one person with one meal. Jason apologizes with a laugh as their knees knock together and their sushi and nigiri is piled haphazardly against each other. He uses his dining room to review tape and he makes a mess with his notebooks and laptop and pens, he says. He explains how he color-codes plays, writes his mistakes in blue, drills he needs to work on in red. Good plays are bright green and black is his color for every move he reads off of his teammates that he wants to study. Dark orange is for tricks he wants to steal off of opposing players and bright orange is everything he notices about goalies, good and bad.

“I don’t get a special color?” Roope jokes.

“You get dark green,” says Jason, “so you stand out from our teammates.” Then he looks embarrassed and stuffs an entire piece of unagi nigiri in his mouth with his fingers.

Roope doesn’t know to respond to that. He hums at Jason, to be kind and Jason looks down at his tray. He changes the subject once he’s swallowed his nigiri and asks Roope what he’d do if he met Messi. 

“Probably panic,” says Roope honestly. “I wouldn’t be cool about it.”

“Yeah, I can see that,” says Jason. He taps his chopsticks against the last piece of a spider roll but doesn’t pick it up. “I feel like you’d probably just freeze up and start speaking your own language. And he’d be like, wow, a European language I’ve never heard.”

“Exactly,” says Roope. And in his own language: “you get me.”

“No, yeah,” says Jason. He picks up the spider roll at last. “He’d probably be impressed by how worldly you are.”

Roope raises an eyebrow.

“And then you’d ask for his autograph and totally blow it,” says Jason, with his mouth full.

#this fic contains key scenes involving boba and sushi is how you can tell it is written by a terminally californian asian american #i'm like what else do people eat...i only vegetarian sushi and i'm still like what else do you eat when you need a delicious meal #while spilling your guts...idk... #unfortunate birdcage fanfictions #i should make a hype image for this collaboration lol that would be so fun

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

472 of 2023

Do you still read the newspaper or have an online newspaper subscription?

No and no, I read news in newspaper online, but only on occasion.

What’s your favourite kind of meat? (vegan/vegetarian options count!)

I guess this survey is not meant for vegetarians as it forces you to choose a meat.

Have you ever been mistaken for staff at a store you were just visiting?

No, but I've been mistaken for NMBS and De Lijn staff lol.

What’s the coolest or most memorable animal you’ve ever seen at a zoo?

I don't go to zoos.

Do you share a bedroom with anybody?

Yeah, with my husband by logic.

What colour are the public buses where you live?

White, with a bit of yellow that's a part of the logo.

How often do you pay your utilities bills?

Once a month, like everyone.

What video game have you played the most hours of? If you don’t know, just make a rough guess.

I don't play video games.

Do you own a two-piece bikini?

I'm a dude, why would I own a bikini? Besides, aren't they always two piece?

Is there anybody else in the room you’re in right now?

No, my husband left for work and our cats are upstairs, I guess.

What have you got within reaching distance of you right now?

A bottle of Coca Cola, my phone, a box of tissues, and my calendar planner. And my tablet.

What have you been craving lately, food-wise? Anything non-food?

Sushi, and these days pizza. Non-food, just to be healthy.

Is your short-term or long-term memory worse?

Omg my short-term memory is shit lol. My long-term memory is great, though.

Do you do anything in particular to help you fall asleep?

Yeah, put the TV on.

What was the weather like today?

It's really cloudy.

Who will you see within the next week?

My husband and one of the people who sells us goods for our shop.

Do you have any guilty pleasure music? Anything you’re willing to admit in this survey answer?

I don't believe in guilty pleasures, I listen to what I like.

What was the last movie you watched that was over two hours long?

I don't watch movies, they're boring.

Speaking of which, what’s the longest you think a movie should be? I personally think most movies are too long.

15 minutes lol. And yeah I agree, movies are way too long.

Do you know anyone who is a medical nurse or doctor?

Yeah lol, the doctors and nurses in the hospital lol. From my family, my maternal grandma was a nurse.

Have you ever worked night shifts? If so, did you like it?

I did indeed and yes, I liked it. Time goes smooth when there's only you and a few workmates around and none of the bosses.

Are you good at fixing computer problems?

Yup, but I always procrastinate on fixing my own computer for some reason.

Do you tend to make decisions by following your heart or your head?

Head. I've been always like that.

What’s the population of your current city/town?

119.541, as of this year.

Do your parents live in their hometown(s)?

Nah, they live somewhere further.

What are you wearing today?

Black sweatpants and white t-shirt.

Are you one to accessorise a lot?

Nope, I only really wear my wedding ring and all my piercings.

What language other than English do you know the most words of?

LMAO. My native language is Dutch, it speaks for itself.

When was the last time you ate? Did you eat something nice?

This morning and it was oatmeal with apples and bananas.

#survey #q&a survey #random survey

[altheterrible]

This came up in my Facebook memories from 2008. Thought it would be fun to do it again almost 15 years later.

1) What should we call you?

Al the Terrible

2) Have you ever showered with someone?

not in any way that was remotely enjoyable.

3) Do you still talk to the person you fell hardest for?

Lol no

4) Are you a male or a female?

Female

5) Was last New Year's Eve enjoyable?

Not really. It was a struggle to stay up until midnight.

6) Are you high?

Unfortunately, no

7) McDonalds or KFC?

They offer totally different products. Generally I'll choose McDonald's though.

8) Burger King or Wendys?

Wendy's, I guess. They have better nuggets.

9) Target or Walmart?

Meijer, usually. I mean, I'm there all the time anyway.

10) What time is it?

2:13 AM

11) Would you ever become a vegetarian?

I hate vegetables, is the thing. So probably not.

12) What is your desktop picture?

SPACE!

13) Can you swim well?

Not at all. Having only one functioning lung makes swimming pretty hard for me, and dangerous to boot. I don't float very well.

14) Would you rather go to Tokyo or Paris?

Hard pass on both. Japan has serious issues with misogyny and France has issues with snobbery.

15) Do you have a guitar in your house?

Yes, a bright orange electric guitar. I also have a blue electric bass.

16) Are you listening to music right now?

Nope, might turn some on though.

17) Who else is in the room with you?

Sev the Cat is asleep on my rocking chair.

18) How long can you go without your phone?

Oh, roughly 32 seconds. I'm a dopamine addict.

19) Do you have any enemies?

None who are aware they're my enemies.

20) What last made you sad?

A billboard for a pet cremation service.

21) Is the person you last kissed younger than you?

He was 14 years old, small, with black fur, yellow eyes, and four legs.

22) Last person talked to on the phone and what did they say?

My doctor's office, I was trying to get them to call in a refill for a med.

23) What is your favorite commercial you've ever seen?

The one I've watched the most is probably the KISS Pepsi commercial. I was obsessed as a teenager.

24) Who last grabbed your ass?

Some drunk creep at work. Love working nights.

25) Do you eat raw cookie dough?

Shamelessly.

26) Don't you hate it when the radio ruins songs by over-playing?

My job plays like the same 25 songs over the PA, most of which I've never listened to voluntarily but nevertheless know all their words.

27) How do you eat oreos?

Generally I don't, but when I do I like to dip them in milk.

28) Are you cocky?

Lol no. I have no faith in my own abilities and will be the first person to express doubt about my capabilities.

29) Could you live without a computer?

I very rarely use an actual computer anymore, mostly I use my tablet.

30) At what age did you find out that Santa wasn't real?

Wait, he's not?

31) What do you do when you're sad?

Do things to make myself even more sad, to the point that it's ridiculous how dramatic I'm being, and I can laugh about it.

32) Who would you call first if you won the lottery?

my sister

33) Is anyone on your bad side now?

I don't have a bad side, I'm a friendly, happy, kind person 100% of the time.

34) What's the first thing you do when you wake up?

Take my morning meds.

35) Will you keep your last name when you get married?

I was thinking if I ever get married, I'll use the opportunity to choose a new last name. I'm a fan of MacKenna

36) Do you return your cart?

Sometimes. Sometimes I put it directly behind someone else's car to be a dick.

37) What brand are your pants/shorts right now?

I think I got them at Walmart, they're really ugly gray sweatpants

38) What irritates you most on the internet?

Videos that autoplay with sound. God, is there anything more awful?

39) Do you like sushi?

I've never had it, but I don't like it as a concept.

Gonna tag people who should do this because I think old fashioned surveys need to come back. @wardinpanties @severinw93 @lifewithchronicpain @theresnocureforcuriosity @westgateoh do it and tag 5 people!

#about me

[existentialstatesofmind]

Jealousy is an ugly thing

Clare: still thought it was a weird situation but she was embarrassed that she'd asked Dakota those insensitive questions in the first place. "Well at least you knew he was around." She said finally, not knowing what else to say. She just couldn't understand a father not wanting to spend time with his kids. Why had they had so many if he was too busy with his job to be bothered? Maybe Clare was a little spoiled. She was the baby of the family and if there had been anything wrong with their family all along, her parents and big sister had hidden it from her well. Now all of a sudden people at church were gossiping about her 'perfect' family falling apart. Clare had found that out because Jesus Club was praying for them and Clare hadn't even asked them to. She didn't want everyone else at school to find out so why was she telling some boy she wasn't even sure she could trust? Clare sighed. "Thanks. You're right, my dad wouldn't just abandon me. He's been acting really weird but it's fine. They probably won't even get a divorce. It's against our religion. I'm probably worrying over nothing." Of course if she really believed that, Clare's stomach wouldn't be churning over the idea of one of her parents moving out. Of having to go back and forth between two houses until that arrangement stopped working. Then she'd have to pick one of her parents over the other or more likely, they'd decide for her. Clare did know kids with divorced parents, and according to them, shared custody never worked out. "They've been married for twenty years." Clare said making it clear that her parents waited a couple of years before they'd had Darcy and they hadn't been teenagers either. Maybe her parents were secretly hypocrites, she wasn't sure yet, but not about that. At least she didn't think so. "Well maybe your sister will be able to adopt kids but being 24 probably makes the situation a lot harder to swallow." Clare listened to Dakota talk more about Emi. "Wow, is she fluent in English too?" Clare asked curiously. "Impressive." She laughed. It was actually kind of amazing that Dakota and his family were turning their lives upside down to accommodate Emi and make her feel at home. "So do they cook meat differently like chicken? Or do they mainly eat vegetarian dishes in addition to noddles and rice, and of course sushi. I like tea, it would be interesting to try some different flavors. I believe it about the grease." Clare chuckled. "Honey bread sounds good." She was puzzled when a different teacher, the one Dakota called Sensi, came in the room to talk to their teacher about seeing Dakota less than five minutes ago. Dakota had been talking to her for longer than that and Clare had been with him the whole time before they'd gone to class. Her blue eyes widened when a boy who looked a lot like Dakota was dragged into the classroom. Clare's eyes darted back and forth between the two. They were obviously brothers judging by their conversation and she could see how Emi would get confused. They were nearly identical. She smiled when Dakota said the other boy was his twin. When his twin jumped out the window and Dakota went out after him, Clare gasped and shook her head in disbelief. She turned away and looked up at the board. She'd almost forgotten she was supposed to be taking notes. Clare finished writing them down and read back over them because she really hadn't been paying much attention. She looked at Dakota when he came back and listened to him explain to the teachers that he and his brother took stunt classes. She couldn't imagine being part of a big crazy family like Dakota's. "What are you going to do with those skills, get a job as a stunt performer?" Clare asked Dakota when he sat back down. She grinned picturing seeing him in some action movie jumping out of a burning building or something.

Kota: listened to Clare talk about her family and smiled at her. "See there's that positive thinking." he rubbed her back and chuckled a bit. "Keep thinking positive and things will be ok." he assured and looked at her. "Plus if something goes bad, you're more than welcome to come over my house, though it's a bit insane." he admitted. "Kota, how are your siblings?" Monica asked. "Eh, Dom and Ash like confusing mom and unintentionally Emi. She gets frustrated when they do that, but she's been holding her own. She calls them 'things' now. Dom is Thing One and Ash is Thing Two. Even when they tell her 'I'm Thing Two not One.' she tells them she doesn't care and if they wanted her to address them with the appropriate name, they'd stop matching." he stated honestly. "I think it's been pissing her off more though." he shrugged and looked at Clare. "Well, she kind of has to be. Her mom doesn't know Japanese too well and as she grew up her dad would speak to her in Japanese while her mom would speak to her in English so it wasn't really hard for us. She still prays before dinner by saying 'itadakimasu' which is a one word prayer asking for the food to be blessed, much like when people say Grace.' he explained. "She's also teaching us the customs. She had us all get a pair of Zori shoes since she's learning how to walk in them, I fell twice. We're lucky she let us wear them in the house." he chuckled a bit. "They're wooden and look like they're on blocks. She even made us buy yukatas for a firework festival she found out about. She said I have to wear sandals with them and I hate them." he explained. "But I did buy some sneakers and my sister got a few pairs of high heels." he stated honestly and nodded when she mentioned the food. "Yea, they cook meat differently. We had Dimsum which is made with chicken and vegetables. They're rolled very much like dumplings and steamed. They have chicken nuggets like we do, but other than that all their meat is cooked differently. They don't have Turkey though, no pork-chops like we have they only have boneless, bacon is expensive there so she's never eaten it, and the chicken as well as pork is all stir fried with noodles and soy sauce or something. It's rather healthy since there's no grease. They also eat skewers a lot. There's hardly any fat on the meats that they eat." he explained. "Even when you make the pork chops which are called Yakisoba, they're boneless and buy them with the fat cut off. Emi was shocked when she first seen they had fat on them and asked what it was. Um, they have steak too." he explained and thought for a moment. "Just don't ask me about the teas. They have about 100 different flavors it seems and it's all so hard to remember." he said honestly. "They have canned tea, hot tea, coffee, soda, non carbonated sodas which I need Miso Soup." he sighed. After dealing with his twin he looked at Clare. "No we were both bullied in Middle school so we took the stunts class to get away from bullies as well as Martial Arts. I'm a black belt now so I mainly help teach it." he explained. "I don't really know what I want to do when I graduate yet and I don't know if I'll still have Emi. If I do have her when I graduate, I'm going to get a part-time job, move into our own house and just let my aunt know." he said honestly. "It's been a week and we don't have anything from her. No messages, no calls, nothing." he explained. "Luckily Emi came with instructions such as her telling me what she likes when she's sick." he added.

#jiaut