#i'm too tired to read through so please ignore any inconsistencies/typos/sentences that don't make any sense all of this probably

[jiangwanyin]

(simply impossible to settle on 5 characters so here's 6 instead hjksgfjxc) wei wuxian, lan wangji, jiang cheng, xiao xingchen, lan xichen, and xue yang for 9, 11, 17… also a few of my own prompts: be a personal assistant for, go on holiday with?? 💖💕💗💌💘💞💖💗

ashleigh my loveeee thank you i would expect nothing less from you and i adore those prompts!!! 💓💖💕💗💘💖💕 also this probably goes without saying but impeccable character choices i love all six of them very much 😌

9. fake-married to for undercover reasons

oh i feel like wei wuxian would definitely be my best bet here, he'd probably be happy to and good enough at putting on a believable act just for the hell of it, we'd get along well & have a laugh about it, we're both relatively open and shameless so i doubt holding hands or being slightly over the top affectionate to sell the show would be too hard for either of us and a bit of bickering and me rolling my eyes at him would most likely just make it all the more realistic, that is unless lan wangji was anywhere nearby because he'd just make heart eyes at him and completely ignore me and we'd be found out in under a minute

xiao xingchen my beloved<3 we have similar enough ideologies and personalities to get along really smoothly, i feel like he'd be easy to fall into a sort of cozy domestic relationship with, he's a bit insecure but *cracks knuckles* that's something i can work with and he's probably a little less used to or comfortable with bigger public displays of affection but then again i didn't see him complain when xue yang put his hand on his ass after to his knowledge knowing him for approximately one day so we probably wouldn't run into any issues there either and we'd have a great time bonding over being insufferable idealists and having an incurable i can fix him disease!! sounds perfect to me

again, i don't think he's really the type to pretend but lan xichen would be equally ideal for this, he's great company, kind and compassionate and easy to get along with and he's patient and even tempered where i'm.... well, not either of those things so i like to think we're simultaneously similar enough and balance each other out alright to have a very harmonic dynamic going on, i'm not entirely sure how convincingly romantic it'd actually be but it'd work well enough and tbh we'd have a good time just hanging out (and just maybe i'd take trying to find ways to make the brilliant zewu-jun flustered as a challenge to spice things up a little<3)

okay realistically he should be a lot lower on this list because he'd probably just murder me and even if he didn't for whatever reason, i doubt it'd have a happy ending, but i just think xue yang and i would make a very interesting team and could probably manage a divorced couple giving reconciliation an attempt dynamic? meaning he'd try and hate me but i'd just channel my inner xiao xingchen ✨ apart from that i'm picturing a lot of arguing and agressive hand holding and getting unnecessarily competitive about it but it just might work. i think. possibly.

lan wangji. oh i love him but i just don't think we could pull it off, the thing is that i adapt pretty well to others, but if the other person is quiet to begin with, i just stay quiet too but you know, we'd be efficient about it? we'd make up for the lack of chemistry by having a good understanding of the other person and figuring out the situation quickly enough, i think we'd make a good team and the rest of the time would be spent reading in comfortable silence next to each other or something, he'd be too reserved and earnest (and let's be honest, too in love with wei wuxian) to do anything more or really pretend and i'm unfortunately way too similar and simply Not naturally good at being loud and easygoing at all if i'm not getting a certain energy from the other person and lan wangji bless him is just not one of those people

yeah yeah i feel really bad about this too but as much as i adore him, i just think jiang cheng would be objectively terrible at any sort of undercover thing and is far too emotionally constipated to act openly in love and too traumatized to even let me get close to him so it'd probably go atrociously, the only way i could see it being anything other than an utter disaster is barely tolerating each other or talking for two weeks, ending up in a tight spot together and bonding over something slightly mean like other people's incompetence and grudgingly realising that we actually get along alright and would probably both start putting a little more effort into the whole fake marriage thing but i still don't realistically think it'd look like anything more than a tentative friendship?

11. to drag them away from a big fight because they’re injured

xiao xingchen. no explanation here, i just think he deserves it and could do with someone taking care of him for a change<3

lan xichen for similar reasons 😇

wei wuxian, i don't trust him to know his limitations and if wen qing isn't around someone's got to make sure he doesn't do anything stupid and overexert himself

jiang cheng. the only reason he isn't any higher on the list is because i don't think he'd appreciate it much and would probably be way too proud and bitchy about it but honestly i'd rather die than admit weakness so i really can't blame him there

lan wangji, he's the smartest one of the lot and i trust him to know what he's doing so he wouldn't be my priority

xue yang. i love him but i also think he deserves to suffer a little and he's probably the one who started the whole fight so maybe this'll teach him how to deal with the consequences, he could do with that

17. cook dinner for

jiang cheng and wei wuxian, i'm lumping them in together here because they're always a package deal and should not be separated we all saw how that worked out (i'm not crying you're crying) and they're canonically shown to thoroughly enjoy a good home cooked meal, i doubt my dishes could compare to yanli's lotus and rib soup but i think they'd appreciate it regardless

arguably he doesn't deserve it but xue yang because i don't think a great many people ever cooked him dinner and it'd do him good with some obligatory candy to go with the meal afterwards of course<3

i think assuming we're friends, lan wangji would also be rather appreciative in his own quiet way? i'd probably make him something veggie based and considerably less spicy than for the yunmeng siblings and we'd go and feed the rabbits and possibly a tiny a-yuan with the leftover carrots :,)

xiao xingchen for reasons stated above. knowing him he'd probably even join me in the kitchen to lend a hand bless him

it feels unnecessarily rude to leave him till last but lan xichen, obviously it would be lovely to cook for him and hopefully he'd like it too i just don't have quite as strong feelings about this scenario involving him as i evidently do when it comes to some of the others 😳

be a personal assistant for

ooo definitely lan xichen i just know he'd be an amazing boss and would probably be incredibly understanding and helpful and tell me i'm doing a good job every time and we both know i thrive on praise and reassurance, jin guangyao had the right idea there, i think all of us could do with daily affirmations from lan xichen<3 nothing quite like it<3

xiao xingchen because working closely with him sounds very lovely and i wouldn't mind running errands or dealing with correspondence for him because he'd also be appreciative and kind about it

alright i'm not saying it'd be pleasant but jiang cheng because at least he's pretty reliable and organized and i would probably be very keen on trying to impress him but would undoubtedly get myself fired one week in because i'm also incapable of keeping my opinion to myself and do not enjoy being bossed about and make it vv obvious

lan wangji. he'd give clear instructions, have reasonable demands, maybe his expectations are a little high and the work environment a bit dry and i'd have to work hard but it'd probably pay off in the end?

just going by level of friendliness and how easy and enjoyable it'd be he should be higher on the list but i'm simply not flexible and easygoing enough to deal with wei wuxian's schedule and general messiness i'm afraid

xue yang because he'd frankly be quite likely to make me kill people for him and i do have a moral code to live up to so no thanks—

go on holiday with

alright these answers already feel very xichen-centric but i'm just going to have to say lan xichen yet again because i feel like we'd be into similar things and would probably have a great and very chill time sightseeing and relaxing together

similarly predictably xiao xingchen, i stand by him being absolutely lovely company and being able to find enough common interests with him too to have plenty to do that we'd both enjoy very much

lan wangji!! perfect quiet and reliable companion to go to museums and libraries etc with and with trustworthy organization skills no less!! no last minute changes to the plan or lost plane tickets or anything unexpected and we could just avoid crowds together which sounds like bliss, i might enjoy someone a tad bit more talkative which is why he's only in third place, but overall it sounds very peaceful and simultaneously productive, we'd definitely be able to tick everything off our list of things to see and do

alright so i don't think our general pace for doing things or ideal holiday destinations would match perfectly but i like to think i'd get along just fine with jiang cheng too, he'd be a bit annoying and we'd likely get equally agitated about delayed flights or bad customer service and whatnot so i'm not sure how relaxing it'd actually be but we'd probably find a couple of things to do we'd both enjoy and the rest of the time wouldn't mind doing things separately and then reuniting in the hotel and going out for dinner

i'm really sorry about this but wei wuxian, he's way too spontaneous and while we'd definitely have fun just hanging out, he'd be bored out of his mind after five minutes doing the stuff i like doing on holiday and i'm too antisocial and not remotely adventurously enough to enjoy the things he'd probably want to do but i do believe we'd find a suitable compromise, i mean he is married to lan wangji and compared to him i actually am quite sociable i swear

xue yang, i really do enjoy him as a character and with a stretch of my imagination i can definitely imagine situations where we would probably be alright unless he's feeling particularly homicidal but i simply don't think we have anything in common or that there's much of an overlap between what we imagine a good holiday to be like i'm afraid

give me 5 characters to rank in a situation

#i know you were properly aware what you were signing up for when you sent this but these are SO long i'm so sorry asfgjds #also i feel bad about how i always end up sort of dragging jiang cheng i swear i love him very much we're just not very compatible #alright i spent longer thinking about these than i care to admit but thank you i enjoyed it immensely of course i love youuuu #asks #haleths #long post #i'm too tired to read through so please ignore any inconsistencies/typos/sentences that don't make any sense all of this probably #sounded a lot better in my head afjsjd