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#if charles doesnt commit crimes and get away with it tomorrow catch me saying i was always mad about it anflaknsfa
slythereen · 8 months
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What annoys me is that if feel like if it was the opposite charles would get a penalty
oh you know that is 1110000% facts, it always seems to be just charles getting mauled by the fia so i'm sure he may be one of the only drivers who would get penalized for that move (goodbye, classic "it's lap one let them race" line)
BUT the good news is that now they really can't give him a penalty for the same tomorrow right?? right, fia????
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writing-good-vibes · 3 years
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brad dourif characters x reader headcanons: marriage
marriage isn't for everyone but if you did tie the knot, there is no way it wouldn't be a wild ride with all of them, one way or another. warning for smut (mild).
charles lee ray
no one could ever accuse this man of being a romantic
(except he really, really is)
legally he doesn't care if you get married or not
but you suggest it first (not a proposal) and you both mutually agree to it
then he sort of proposes (with a ring and flowers) after you've already agreed
if you want a legal marriage it would have to be before any of his murders are he is known to the police
(he's already known for petty crime but getting married would really blow his cover if he's already a wanted murderer)
you go to the nearest courthouse and have a bare minimum ceremony
he wears the nicest suit he already owns
and you go out and get a white dress that you could wear again to a bar
you sign the papers
then you consummate your love in the ladies toilets
whether you go on honeymoon depends on how much money you have at the time
either you go to a tacky wedding motel or you stay in and don't leave the apartment for a week
either way you're having a lot of sex
like seriously
jack dante
it's hard work to get him to actually go through with the wedding
he is actually the one to propose to you
after sex of course
"babe, we should like, get hitched"
he means it, he does, but maybe in a more metaphorical way??
it takes some nagging but you finally get him to go down to the courthouse with you
there is definitely a legal/financial aspect of your marriage
like he may be the wild card employee but he gets paid ludicrously well for everything he contributes to the company (and to try and keep a little bit under control)
if something happened to him (and he has no doubt one day bob might just have him bumped off) he may as well give everything to you, there's no one else for it to go to
neither of you dress up for the ceremony
but you do buy some tacky bridal lingerie to wear underneath
another bare minimum ceremony
it's not your first rodeo doing it in a public restroom
it's almost romantic, a repeat of your first time
the white lacy panties are surprisingly very appreciated
you have to convince him to move back to his old apartment together now that you're married instead of hiding away at CHAANK
he honestly probably forgets you're even married until you bring it up
billy bibbit
he proposes to you
one day while you're at home on a sunday afternoon
lay together on the couch while you read
"h-hey, i h-h-have sssomething to a-ask you"
his stutters gets a tiny bit worse and you worry something is up
"l-l-listen, I-I rrreally love y-you a-a-a-and I-" he has to pause and collect himself
but you already know what he's going to ask and you can't keep from smiling
"w-will you m-m-mmmarry me?"
you throw your book aside and throw your arms around him
"yes! yes, of course I will billy!"
billy is a good christian boy so you have a good christian church wedding (unless you have other religious/secular preferences)
it's a very small wedding
only your favourite family members and closest friends come
same with billy
he feels incredibly guilty for not inviting his mother, but he hasn't seen her since he finally discharged himself from the hospital
you reassured him and remind him that this is the start of your lives together
he looks so dapper in his suit
you help him pick it out
he insists he doesn't want to see your dress until the big day
he cries when he sees you walk up the aisle
loves calling you his wife, and you calling him husband makes him feel wanted
puts your wedding photo in every room and carries it around in his wallet
sheriff brackett
he didn't expect he'd ever find someone he'd want to marry
(what with his last marriage ending the way it did)
when he realises he's truly in love with you, and you with him, he plans his proposal
it's nothing extravagant but it's absolutely perfect
you have a romantic dinner together and he does a whole speech about how much he loves you
and you see where it's going but you let him go on for a minute until you're like "do you want to ask me something?"
he flusters about it but is very cute and finally pops the question
"i - sweetie, i'd be honoured to make you my wife, will you marry me?"
you have a church wedding (unless you have other religious/secular preferences)
close family and friends only
cries when you walk down the aisle
annie gets very invested in helping with the planning and is probably more bothered about it than either of you are
you have a (very) classy dress
loves that he can call you his wife now !! the sheriff's wife !!
reception at your house, classic buffet
lowkey you both cannot wait untl everyone just leaves
*wink wink*
you do have a first dance in private though after everyone leaves
you're both soft and giggling and the song is a cheesy love song but it's perfect
your wedding night is the height of romance
your bridal lingerie really does it for him
what better start for your marriage than him making you cum so many times that you lose count?
doc cochran
you and doc didn't think you'd get married at all
neither of you felt the need to make anything official
you both consider yourself as his common law wife anyway
but something happens (either you get pregnant or some unrest with the camp politics makes the future seem uncertain) you decide you may as well tie the knot officially
there's no real proposal, he just sort of asks
you go to the Grand where E.B (being mayor) unfortunately has to officiate
you don't intend to invite anyone, saying it is no one elses business
but people catch wind (i.e. al, trixie and jane, merrick, maybe sol and seth) and basically invite themselves
you wear your best dress
and doc doesn't half scrub up well
Al invites you both back for a drink at the gem which you accept
("only one though, al" "sure, sure, you gotta get back home - the marriage bed is waiting - I understand")
the marriage bed is waiting though and you get kind of emotional when you go home together for the first time as husband and wife
funnily enough no one shows up at doc's that night for treatment and you have the whole night to yourselves
grima wormtongue
it takes you both a long time before you admit your feelings for each other and commit to having a relationship rather than a friends with benefits situation
marriages move fairly quickly in middle earth
no sooner are you engaged are you at the alter
wedding is moderately fancy because grima is doing pretty well being the king's adviser
few people actually show up who don't have to be there though because neither of you exactly have a lot of friends
grima almost clams up when it comes the ceremony because he doesnt want to say all this personal stuff about how much he loves you in front of other people
but you both get through it and finally, finally you are properly married
he's very emotional when you consummate your marriage but he tries to hide it
(but you know him too well)
tommy ludlow
he proposes one morning after sex
it's only just getting light and you both have to get up for work soon
you're still sweaty and his face is pressed into your neck
and in hushed tones you whisper back and forth
"will you marry me?"
it takes you a second to process what he said, "you wanna get married?"
"if you'll have me"
you kiss him and whisper "yes"
it's a church wedding for you and tommy (unless you have other religious/secular preferences)
he has a pretty big extended family and he has to invite them all
your dress and his suit are second hand
(because you're saving for better things)
laura takes a lot of photos for you
including the classic confetti toss one as you leave the church
takes you ages to comb all the confetti out of tommy's hair afterwards
cheesy first dance at the wedding reception
you can tell tommy is nervous so you joke around and make sure he doesn't take it too seriously
when you get home? goddamn you ride him like there's no tomorrow
(still in your wedding dress)
leo nova
it's go big or go home with him
80s fashion at its best
your dress is worth more than the rent on your old apartment
he doesn't see it before the wedding
you're surprised at how many traditions he sticks too despite him having the emotional range of a teaspoon
not many people get an invite to the ceremony but it's a wild after party
like a bunch of coked out 80s gangsters ?? amazing
the honeymoon is next level
you go to some tropical holiday resort (caribbean, thailand or spain) and it is all sun, sex and sangria for two whole weeks
tucker cleveland
didn't think he'd want to get married again
but in reality he just didn't like his first wife all that much
takes you out to dinner and proposes
when you say yes he is honestly relieved
but because he doesn't want to get emotional he calls over the waiter to get your free dessert
courthouse wedding
you do insist he wears a suit though and you buy a white dress
does the whole "just married" thing on the back of his truck
actually takes you on a honeymoon (sort of)
you go out of state and stay in a motel for a week
(vigorous sex ensues)
now you're married good and proper you can be his good little wifey
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