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#im so soft for this mech i swear ON GOD
ikkosu · 14 days
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Ikko ikko ikko ikko
How do you think Met Prowl would handle an injured human💚.
As always you have lovely writing and I adore everytime I see you when I’m scrolling or when I see you in my inbox💚
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。⁠:゚⁠(⁠;⁠´⁠∩⁠`⁠;⁠)゚⁠:⁠。waughh hejkejbhrrk,,,,sniff,,,,sniff ough you are too sweet for this world compy,,,,sniff sniff you are keeling me
GOSH PROWL,,, this man would not let whoever hurt his human scamper out scathe free.
Prowl has anger issues, yes. He's angry like half of his lifetime so nobody ever really bats an eye. But they know the only closest person to ever subdue his aggressive tendency to obliterate a fucking room, is you.
(They know for a fact that prowl would never hurt you, even when he's utterly pissed)
The moment they see you're there, in a puddle of crimson, half-conscious. They halt — literally freeze into place because Prowl is unusually calm standing before the con.
Unlike his usual scowl, this is a stare that pierces right through everyone's spark. Prowl calmly walks past the con, to his human and assessed the injury. Con is a bit baffled by the blatant ignoring and watches as he hands you over to Ratchet
(who, for once, has a demure attitude, unusually quiet with a concerned expression.)
But the concern isn't for prowl.
The rest of the crew watches as Prowl, with the calmness of a gentle breeze, obliterate the con. He's not even trying. Not even trying to throw jabs. Just lazily dodging, throwing hooks, throwing cuts that sting and he'll make sure to draw out the pain as long a possible.
He values efficiency, but sometimes unconventional means would have to be used when a certain kind of obstacle is faced.
Anyways, the con gets utterly destroyed (sent to med-bay where the medics would do their 'rounds' on them) and he scampers just in time they're dressing your wounds.
Prowl barges in and says he'll be taking over. The nurses are confused because what the hell is a robot doing here— but, is left no room for protest as he gives them the glare (tm).
They scuttle out without a moment's notice.
And, ohhh boy is he gentle with his human
:( his servos, once taut always so ready to pounce, wrap the bandages around their limbs with such care, it bores the weight of a feather. His other servo cradles your head and a digit it's rubbing against your cheek.
For once, prowls making a face that's not a scowl, and something akin to distraught. At that he feels disconcerted, for someone who preaches about logical thinking — he's incredibly emotional, right now, and would want nothing better than the bright smile and pull of your face.
He pulls you flushed to his chassis and closes his optics.
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stray-tori · 3 years
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TPN Vol 13 (and some earlier volumes) Thoughts
I honestly thought there’d be more sort of... domestic fun times in the shelter with the dadsTM but Ig not, okay byeeee- (i wish i could be sad, come on brain)
I also just... they HAD to throw in that romantic sub...element before he died?? really? was that necessary? ugh. I felt like they could have done more of these flashes to the past earlier and then just reminded us of them here but... oh well.
Also Emma’s dreams give her therapy. I’m not sure if TPN is saying that these sort of visions are actually some sort of supernatural connection but I find the idea funny that Emma gives herself therapy in her dreams and just SENSES the timing of the explosion (again, weird “placing scenes inbetween other things that already happened”) - that was intense, but I just... I’m not huge on these outright CONVERSATIONS. I think for Ray’s hallucination it worked better because (and the german dub goes in on this even more) Norman just says things (even if a bit different) that were already said before, so it’s more of a.... coming together I guess.
That also kind of bothered me about the scene when Emma is passed out   in GP, it just felt a little “??”, thanks Emma for giving yourself a pep talk by imagining all of that. Ik she’s close to death BUT HOW DID SHE KNOW HOW PEOPLE DIED THAT SHE NEVER MET.
We kind of joked that since the eye necklace gives Emma that one experience on the water, it might be what triggers these things? but then again, it also happens earlier so probably not-
but it’s a fun little inside joke, “ah, there the eye goes again”.
.
STUPID KIDS- I mean yes let the kids be stupid sometimes but GOD WHY NOW, GO BACK- though ig if they had the mech owls, they might have easily found them again anyway. who knows.
How convenient that the randoms always died.
BUT injuries actually persist and are dealt with instead of just time-skipping to when the person in question is okay again :) Emma’s stab had no weight, it was only there for Yugo’s arc and was not dealt with satisfyingly for me hh...
I didn’t talk about this I think because I didn’t note down things for that volume, but hh idk, she seemed PERFECTLY FINE when she got up again, which was hard for me to believe... and afterwards, we couldn’t have gotten one or a few chapter(s) showing the things Emma recaps happened while she was out? We couldn’t have gotten some angsty panels with unconscious Emma and people coming to her side? come on :(
.
please get Andrew off my screen pls end my suffering, i do not want to LOOK AT THIS.
but also. goddamn. shounen manga, huh-
LIKE THIS IS EPIC BUT ALSO I DO NOT WANT TO SEE IT.
.
HAHAHA I THOUGHT THE ANIME CAME UP WITH THIS CONVENIENT DEMON NOM dsihsds, the manga executed it better (i will never get over how the anime cast just sits there like :o at the first time seeing a human being eaten but hey) but it’s still... very convenient oml.
Ray just wants to be burdened. the man wants to use his resolve to kill. let him.
.
Minerva time - obviously the secrecy is kinda ruined by the anime and by spoilers, but... idk... do people actually not find obscuring people... sus? I mean I GUESS the first time we saw the person with the hood, they also didn’t show his face SO I SUPPOSE it’s not completely unlikely that it’s just continuing to do that - but why would you not show it if it was actually James? He already had a face reveal. And the super harsh shadows on only him just look kind of awkward and hhh I DON’T KNOW-
As much as I like this scene as their introduction and I’m glad we get to see the mass production farm (the hug killed me), I also would have preferred them to omit him from it or just not show it NOW (they love their insert-scenes-in-hindsight stick way too much anyway) to commit to the “secrecy” approach for the audience. But maybe I just don’t get it. And I do like the scene so I’ll shut up and take it.
I will say... Barbara eating demon meat reveal in the anime... i liked that more tbh. Because we realize it with Emma and Ray and the way it frames the meat and her hate talk, it’s just MWAH-
Though they also have a lot more personality in the manga which I feel wouldn’t have hurt their anime counterparts.
I still pledge for a two year age-up for this story iduskhjds, it wouldn’t have hurt in general but also jsut because... imagining a 13 y/o dramatically pulling his hood off on a balcony in front of a crowd is just... not as epic to me as it’s supposed to be I think fuishdjs
And as much as the execution of the Norman reveal in the anime deserves to be dunked on and as awkward as the “walking up without saying anything” is... at least being in a demon community was a good reason to actually, yknow OBSCURE their faces and hide them naturally. I didn’t really think about this before BUT that actually makes a lot of sense and I like that more than the harsh shadow treatment.
I also always thought that the “Minerva” cover was supposed to make them come to him, which I GUESS it did, but he had his messages anyway (the way I thought it went was that he had no way to contact them, so he took that cover so they’d come find him eventually and stuff) and ALSO sent people out to find them so I guess it wasn’t the only reason - I suppose it’s also for other children/humans who know Minerva. I actually really like this element, I think it’s neat. I just thought it wouldn’t be this.... in your face and more sort of... not showing him at all until they meet him.
I also hope he actually told the squad his name is James, he’s just like a completely different person, actually sadssda.
I just find it funny to think about Lucas hearing some young soft-spoken boy, maybe barely being grazed by puperty voice and going, “yup, thats the same person as I heard on the phone with Emma :)” just. how. like if he didn’t think so I would have assumed he’d mentioned it.
Also another case of “we didn’t hint this, we didn’t show this off to the side in a panel (or tori is blind), BUT IT HAPPENED GUYS I SWEAR. HE ALSO GAVE IT TO OLIVER I SWEAR!!!!-”
.
I didn’t know about the mech owls. interesting.
.
I find Jin and Hayato’s reactions to the group interesting. the group kind of sees all the GF escapees as holy or also as their rescuers sth because like, if they hadn't escaped, none of them would be free, etc. Which now that I think about it, is... technically not true ig since Norman could have escaped Lambda even without the GF escape succeeding so. HM. And ig since they bowed to them, I think maybe it's jsut "wow you escaped on your own, you're so cool"? I just wonder if they kind of began thinking that way on their own or if Minerva's protecc squad/Minerva kind of gave them reason to behave that way by talking about the GF escape or something... probably they just did it on their own but I'm just rambling.
or maybe they’re just impressed they aren’t incompetent.
.
idk if im forgetting anything but yee, here we go. I’m just being a judgy prick, I’m enjoying it (mostly bc our read is just chaotic).
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kinoko-koe · 3 years
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Story Overview and Basic Organization
Im not really getting around to typing down the larger posts of individual stories so im just placing down some basic information about the ones i have at the moment so i can come back and expand when i actually feel like it
-Stories are listed in the order i have created them not necessarily in chronological order nor are most of them directly related-
(usually when i say things like “over time” im skipping things)
Still cant remember what i called this one lol
The Ascension of the Demi-God of Chaotic Destruction
Using some generic tropes from isekai stories, a group of 5 college-aged friends (2 men 3 women) are suddenly transported to another world with baked in gaming elements that all its inhabitants are aware of. The summoned group have random skills assigned to them and the kingdom that summoned them wanted to find good skills from the summoning.
The main character of this story is one of the men who has been given skills that are more of a support-y mage type, the other man has skills well suited for being a warrior and is sent to the military and one the the women is given to the church to become a cleric, the other 3 including the MC are less valuable to the kingdom and are sent off to improve themselves with minor support from the throne. On his first adventure out with some novices he finds it difficult to relate to the people of this world and also loses his left arm when attacked by a maniac.
Over time the MC gains the class “Infinite Chaos” after being tempted by it as its a strange class not known or available to others. The class grants skills at random times and prevents further class changes among other things. This leads to the MC’s main combo of using the randomly acquired Oil Magic and exploding it from a distance with Fire Magic. The game like system in the world is setup by a deity masquerading as the Grand Deity of Order and this class’s availability, among other complexities, was added by the Ancient of Chaos without the deity’s awareness.
As the MC keeps coming back to the kingdom’s capital every now and then he finds his friends to be different then they used to be and over time become unrecognizable to him (except the one that just became a chef in the capital) although he is also changing to them from the influence of his class. As he feels the only people he can relate to changing he becoming increasingly alone and reckless in his combat while adventuring
While its hard to list all the small changes that happen over time from the class Infinite Chaos and all the non overarching plot events (as i dont want to keep on just this one story) everything reaches a climax when his friends are killed by the Demon King, a mountain-sized giant with absurd dexterity and and enormous sword. He sees this through Farsight rushes to the area, crushing all the monsters and demons in the way. The fight between the MC and the Demon lord triggers the Apocalypse skill they both have from their classes and the world descends into darkness and madness. The Goddess of Moonlight attempt to interrupt the fight but as the two are both almost Demi-Deities in strength together they dispatch her quickly causing the artifical moon she placed to fall towards the planet; and through the gamelike system giving exp from the kill and the Infinite Chaos class allows the MC to ascend into the Demi-God of Chaotic Destruction, a being made of eyes and oil (probably not like youre thinking) and through his Authority can destroy the skills the Demon King uses and wins the battle as the world ends from the moon crashing into the planet.
The Gods of the Sky
Uplifting a civilization to stall an invasion
A sci-fi story about an alien invasion and an alien scientist stalling for time for their federation to arrive with military support. The POV switches between a human female bureaucrat and the alien scientist. The humans are starting out their industrial era, their cities are built around giants that their “god” left on the planet. These giants are robots set to protect the planet from outside invaders. The story starts as the bureaucrat is leaving a city by train as alien ships descend from the sky and the city’s robot starts up as heavily damages the city as its launches itself into combat. Although the robot is able to defeat the scouting ships it is heavily damaged and stalls outside the city.
Later the bureaucrat reaches the city and gives a report on what happened, and the country leaders launch an investigation. The aliens send more ships and have their crew dismantle the worn-down giant robot, where the humans see the aliens for the first time, they are 6 limbed (2 legs 4 arms) creatures with obsidian-like exoskeletons and solid gold eyes. The church declares these aliens to be “demons” here to destroy the giants their “god” left behind.
POV swaps to the scientist who is in a observation ship in orbit, annoyed at the failure of their ship’s alarm system, sends an emergency message to their federation military for “protection of the innocent” from out of federation invaders. They descend their ship to the planet to help assist the humans from the invasion, where a giant robot attacks and is one-shot by their Matter-Annihilation-Cannon. The scientist is a starfish-esque creature that always wears a high-tech mech suit.
The government is obviously skeptical of the scientist at first and the scientist fight the first wave of the “demons” alone with only their ship and utility robots. The scientist finds the “demons” to learn weaknesses in equipment very fast and concludes that they are a hivemind. By using the Matter-Annihilation-Cannon aimed at their commanders the first wave is repelled, but the Cannon can only be fired 3 times before breaking down from its own mechanics and the ship is a science ship without much combat prowess. The goverment now trusting them a bit more the scientist starts using their engines along with advanced handheld weapons to make primitive fighter planes to fight with.
skimming over some stuff eventually a diplomatic spaceship from the federation arrives before the military reinforcements as they were nearby for a new planet colonization ceremony, where its revealed that the federation already has humans in it and the humans on this planet were abducted from Earth thousands of years ago. Along with the scientist’s species and humans there are three other alien species in the federation. A jellfish-esque species that communicates through bioluminescence and has a computer attached that translates for them, a slug-esque religious capitalist species that wears high-tech rugs on their backs as status symbols, and a sapient parasitic plant species that infested human livestock and intentionally bred them to be easier to control and move around in.
Even with this addition to their fighting force the “demons” have an absurd advantage in numbers and, over time, the humans on the planet are reduced to one last city and its giant robot when the federation arrives and completely annihilates the “demons” using terraforming technology to molecularly deconstruct the “demons” on the surface and use Matter-Annihilation-Cannons to destroy their ships. The starfish species that leads the federation dont even think twice as the entire species has a unified strong sense for justice as the planet was violently invaded the invaders are guilty and mercilessly destroyed.
(I swear theres a story im forgetting between these two)
Arisen Anew
Ambition-less Reincarnation and the Demon God Cult (aka everyone hates the Goddess of Resonance)
....Honestly this one went through so many changes and i dont actually like them all and i just kinda dont want to type it.
The basis of this story was a adventurer woman has her party wiped by a bunch of demonkin while on a guard mission and a unrelated mage to their party also took the guard quest and kills the adventurer and the demonkin by just nuking the whole area in fire and the mage has the Demi-Deity of Burning Resurrection (a phoenix) bound to them and the adventurer that is killed get reincarnated and eventually in the new life of the adventurer a cult is formed around the Demi-Deity of Congealing Biomass and they view the reincarnated MC as “the Betrayer” that is in their prophecy that betrays the religion set up by the Goddess of Resonance but... the story kinda got away from that premise, the cult is still around but they were manipulated by the Deity of Non-Physical Connections and i just idk im not that interesting in continuing typing about this one.
(this was typed before i typed to mini-summary) Honestly i think this story was better when i was building it without the ambition-less thing but it just kinda ended up that way when i was finding reasons for the MC to give in to the temptation of the Deity of Non-Physical Connections and the cult and after realizing that she really didnt have any ambitions for anything she was doing the whole time soooooo.......
Hero Killer
Ive just legitimately forgotten a lot about this one almost didnt put it here at all lol
This one is about a True Mimic, a being that can mimic anything (appearance not powers), who is given the Soul Shattering Spear by the God of Obscure Knowledge and uses the spear to kill the plethora of heroes summoned by the Goddess of Judgement to slay the Demon Lord. The True Mimic MC is in a romantic relationship with the Demon Lord so the slaying is more than just a loyalty thing.
The Demon Lord is a strange monster the closest thing is like a satyr with spiral staircase horns and three eyes. She wears a veil at all times and never talks as her speech has a strange power of a kind of soft mind control that makes monsters feel loyalty and makes humans feel disdain.
Honestly outside of the raid on the Demon Lord’s castle while the True Mimic is distracted killing a different hero there wasnt really a whole lot of events beyond that that were actually put in an actual order or were actually relevant to the overarching plot
Amongst Gods (in development)
The story follows a group of humans that like in a massive cave city under a mountain. Outside the cave is a world filled while powerful destructive creatures whose biology doesnt appear logical. A being made of floating mirrors that incinerates things prevents the humans from leaving their city farther than the forest they hunt lesser beings in. One day “The Sky Legs” pass by and destroy the mirror being after it attacked one of its legs. The group of humans go off past where the mirror being held them in.
Past this location they run into a steel being that looks like a horse that starts killing them and a humanoid dragon that helps the survivors and brings them to the dragon settlement. The humanoid dragons are humans that made a pact with the Demi-Goddess of Dragonic Multiplication thousands of years ago and became half dragon. Their settlement is protected by the Demi-Goddesses’s children.
that basically it so far and i probably wont develop beyond this lol
Heretic (in development)
A world where the deities directly interact with humans personally, a grand system of schools have been set up under individual deities to teach humans magic. Each deity tests humans if they are compatible with their teachings and add the worthy to their branch of their overarching school. There are four overarching schools; Arcane, Elemental, Nature, and Dimensional.
Major cities are set up to have several deities with as many “school branches” as possible to scout as many new members as possible. Even larger cities exist solely to help mages progress their magical studies in well regulated “school cities” with over 100 different deities each with hundreds of students.
The story begins with the MC, a magic uh... fan? that recently became an adult, coming to a school city to find a deity to learn from. However, she constantly fails the deities’ tests for compatibility for a week, after 10 days without finding a patron deity her city permit expires and is basically kicked out.
As she is getting a bit desperate, a small strange shadow beckons her and she follows, this continues until the shadow brings her to the back of a strange house and the shadow lets her in and leads her to the basement. Obviously she’s a bit suspicious but also a bit dumb, and opens the way to the basement after some effort to open a strange old door. Inside the basement is a Deity. A shadowy skeleton beast with meter long finger and toe bones and a dinosaur-esque skull with six eyes with wing bones and its back that are layered in shadows.
The deity before the MC explains that the shadow owe it a favor and brought someone compatible with it before it, and that it knows that the MC couldnt find a patron deity and offers its own test. A simple test; it vomits a black liquid into a cup and tells her to drink it. A seemingly gross test thats truly about the trust she will place in the deity. After immense hesitation she drink the liquid and passes out, along with passing the test. The deity and the shadow from earlier bring her back to the room shes rented for her stay in the city, and the deity hides in her shadow.
After the obvious confusion that would occur, the deity starts to teach the MC about shadow magic through the rather forceful method of possession (as she really isnt that cut out for normal magic lessons) The deity also heavily avoids direct questions about its exact powers and school classification.
This is about what ive got so far theres is some general events after this ive got but they arent really fleshed out yet, however the deity that the MC found is the Deity of Inevitable Demise, and its School is the Heresy school that the other deities intentionally suppress as its consists of magic only useful for harming or destroying, such as mind control, necromancy, and instant death.
Why can the Deity of Inevitable Demise control shadows you ask? well thats because it has influence over the end of everything. The end of life, light, movement, fate, space, and time. Although its ability to manipulate those attributes is depended on how close those ends are to the current location, but darkness, the end of light, is readily accessible in most scenarios.
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Thats all for this post this has been loitering as a draft for a few weeks and i didnt double read it so somethings might not make sense but oh well done and posted is better than nothing.
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kuroandtheguys · 6 years
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QUOTES (as in things i’ve said, not necessarily original things but things ive said.) FROM MUN HIKARY,HER DAD AND CLASSMATES AS RP STARTERS:
"get your fuck boy out of my house"
"Listen here you fuck nugget"
"don't touch me you bafoon"
"leave the soul alone"
"WHERE IS SPACE DAD"
"i got some shoes from my drug dealer, i dont know what he laced them with but i've been tripping all day...."
"Sure thing Chew-Brocka"
"the beatings will continue until morale improves."
"looking to protect yourself or deal some damage?"
"The egg-salts?"
"much cheese cake"
"FIGHT ME"
"DO YOU FOLKS LIKE COFFEE!"
"baby,princess, dear,dearest. Do me a favorite and get your head out of my ass"
"Whats up gays!"
"Its 1 get the fuck up you lil shit"
"its a porch...not a deck....."
"when one plays the earth game twister one finds out more about the other's than they wanted"
"pain is your reward for being near me."
"oh it's the nasty crime boi"
"follow the yellow-dick road"
"these jokes arent the only thing that suck"
"stupid controls! I said walk to the side not jump off the cliff"
"_GET YOUR DICK OUT OF MY GODDESS!"
"Zarkon unhand my space father"
"sadness is merely a part of life."
"BON BON YOU WANT SUM FUC"
"they're gonna play Mario cart"
"that's how friendship dies"
"ID BE THE TINY ANGRY GUY, I CANT REMEMBER HIS NAME"
"Space Dad jokes are out of this world"
"space dad part of a balanced breakfast"
" i wonder whats over here, oh its plot"
"not all wood resists magic damage"
"destroy us all!"
"i could pee in a bucket and tell him it's beer."
"i would fuck lance because who wouldn't"
"ITS BECAUSE IM A DEMON ISINT IT? THATS RACIST!"
" IF YOU LOVED ME YOUD KILL THE SPIDERS"
"Fite me!"
"fuck Shiro because, just look at him. Who wouldn’t?"
"I am tumblr senpai"
"Why is he grinding?!"
"They bonded by beating the shit out of eachother."
"ah ah put those grabby hands away." (wow without context that sounds really dirty)
"if I have social anxiety and YOU have social anxiety then who's going to order the food?"
"now if they made space dad shaped mac and cheese i wouldnt mind so much"
"it could be 1 of 2 things metal leg or morning wood"
"i like chicks not dicks"
"why cant you just say vagina?"
"Ok so if you ever need a break from your mech with a watersport kink let me know."
"I love you" "dude thats gay..." "we are litterly having sex"
"watch your mouth you little shit"
"yes daddy dearest"
"COME HERE MY SPACE CHILD"
"Let me hug you space child"
"i must adopt this lost space child"
"soft and warm space dad"
"omg your so extra"
"hgn those claws he could just rip me apart"
"we can go inside"
"i wouldn't want to expose you"
"he's see more of your girlfriend than you have"
"we had a bonding moment i punched you in the face!"
"I ate my school"
"this limp noodle"
"PRAISE MUNWAY"
"You wanna ride my huge dragon"
"and i don't know....somethin' bout friendship..."
"Tid be a pitty if i killed him off"
"you've been shanked" "..with a ruler..."
"did you just giggle your boobs at me?"
"It was an earth shattering shit"
"I am the pumpkin gardian"
"Hold my beer and watch this mother fucker
"Careful nuts make you swell, just ask your sister"
"My dad the crack dealer"
"balls deep in an au"
"Don't fuck on my expensive leather couch you cunts"
"He's a perceptive hoe"
"blubbering balls of teenage awkwardness"
"What can I say except~ FUCK OFF"
"I am the alpha dad"
"thats a kick in the danger clam"
"your gonna get your weiner stuck in the baby gate"
"I'm taking you back to the pound"
"I'm so sorry the princess had his feelings hurt"
“Hey demons, it’s ya boi, Satan. Give me the homie back”
"my name is stan, im satan"
"I Came Here For A Good Time And All I Got Was Porn"
"it went from warm to freezing because snow miser is shitting on us"
"Near death can be fixed with ducktap"
"I don't remember what I did with my pants"
"It smells" "You smell" "Your face smells" "You almost got punched I'm the face"
"Bueno bear"
"MAKE THAT ANGST YOUR BITCH"
“Gently bullied him into submission”
*Holds up fishing pole and bubbles* hookers and blow.
"To hard, to thick. I'd get hair stuck in my teeth" "...don't ever say that in public."
"Even lesbians like babies"
"My dad is like a fun vampire"
You are a steampunk blood warrior with a plan"
"You are a steampunk blood warrior with a flan"
"You've been hit by you've been struck by a smooth lesbian"
"You just made the inquisitior gay" "Yes" 5 minutes later "So what else us on the table" "The inquisitior"
"Did...did you just call the Cat a butt plug?"
"not like that you kinky fuck"
"kinky princess Matthew holt and his fluffy sidekick Mr whiskers."
"DONT MAKE ME KINKSHAME YOU AGAIN" "MAYBE YOU'LL KINKSHAME ME HARD THIS TIME"
"I'm gay and I'm ready to party"
"You founded a country on cocaine and prostitution?"
"You know what looks delicious" "What" "Your tight ass" "Your a hoe, like ben" "_ lemme smash"
"Human Sacrifice is always an option if you aren't a weak little bitch."
"Last time you had an imaginary friend I'm pretty sure it was a demon"
" I don't want to be propositioned by you in private!"
"Don't vore the dogs"
"Surely not everyone was kung-fu fighting" "They were" "..we're they fast as lightning?" "No they were slow, Tai Chi mother fucker"
"There’s a train of thought but it’s been de railed and Billy the kid robbed it."
"Shes just where burgers go to die"
"Im a priest to our lady of sin and this is my seeing eye dragon"
"Hello nightmares my old freind"
"they took some scaly lizard dick"
"I would go to Satan jazz club"
"Gandalf the off white"
"Stop kicking my puppy"
"You sleep darted that man in the dick"
"i didn't hit puberty...i just kinda shook it's hand"
"Tall, dark, warm and edgy. The perfect dad"
"Cerberus thinks he's a lap dog"
"thank god for incredible upper body strength"
"No ship wars. I multi ship like an adult" "Am I an adult I poly ship?" "Yes"
" my flaccid dagger"
"He's running around like a squirrel on crack"
"Could you please acidenly flex somewhere else your distracting me"
"It is the first day of Christmas fucker"
"Don't make me beat ypu with egg nog"
"Why did it suddenly become British?"
"You've been BLUNDERSTRUCK"
"Slav tellaported from another dimension to punch you in the arm"
"Floating kingdom of dabalon"
"I like my nightshade pomegranate flavored"
"dont dab on my boobs"
"The first vampire ran into the sun"
"I need a pocket sendak"
"Four score and 7 years ago our founding pirates"
"Been fueling up on....."
"Life is a highway?"
"the lyrics are coke and whiskey dumb ass"
"all i want for Christmas is the dreamiest daddy."
"HAIL KURO"
"patience yields fucking"
"Gray haired man on a house coming through" "I tottally thought you said gay haired man"
"Oh... mood"
"You wrap presents like a blind t rex"
"i take a look at me enormous-"
"white privilege."
"I swear to all of the gods I'm going to climb you like a fucking vine"
"The pellar, he uh.... loves his goat"
"whispers goat fuckerrrr"
"sleeping with slytherins" "dont you mean sirens?" "same fucking thing"
"No one told you life was gonna be this-" "Gay?"
"I am truly the hobo on top of the polar express" "No your the homo ontop of the polar express" "Can't she be a homo hobo?"
"Kinkshame me harder"
“Kinkshame me harder spicy papa”
"Male griffin returns and is like what the fuck did you do to my wife"
"WITH YOUR SHAG CARPET ID BE GETTING HAIR BALLS"
"Drug cloud please disperse"
"Just cause I'm gay dosent mean the cake needs to be"
"BITCH I OUTRANK YOU"
"Just cause I'm gay dosent mean the cake needs to be"
"Right in the paw patroler"
"Stuffed em up Mr patato head's butt"
"feed me"
"i swear if you start singing-"
"must be blood"
"here she gose again"
"must be fresh"
"i dont wanna hear this"
"FEED ME, FEED ME SEYMORE~"
"Get on the fucking dragon or I will leave you in this tower"
"Vivia le roi" "LONG LIVE THE REVALUATION" "No.... long live the king"
"I'm a senior my vote counts more"
"I am gentle snek"
"The boner wizzard is a girl" "That's a dragon" "Girl dragon"
"my father the actual 5 year old" "thats right 5 times a whole bunch"
"why..... is your icon a crotch buldge?"
"Layers" "Like an oinion" "Yes and their all gonna make you cry"
"You blushing" "I'm pasty and I burn in the sun anytime I go out." "So your burned..?" "Yes fucker"
 "You should be careful dancing around with those daggers when I'm throwing fire" "It won't hurt me. It's friendly fire"
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