#in the wake of her realization she’s bound to concede any ‘fictional’ preconceptions of attraction just as she abandoned her preconceptions

[zanathan-aisling]

theres like, two levels of “playersexual”.

the first is the authors making all the romance options bi, which. like technically it can often stem from the same mechanical reasoning as “true” playersexuality (omfg im gatekeeping?????), that its easier, more efficient, or more equitable to just have all the options available to any character setup. in that sense theyre absolutely taxonomically related, but from a semantic and ethical point of view it seems kinda dogshit to reduce textually bi (one way or another, theres a lotta ways to do that) people to a mere practical development choice? like dude i think that characters just bisexual its kinda fucking wierd to frame his ability to be attracted to [character in context thats not the pc’s gender] and also romance the player character as some sort of “lazy writing shortcut”.

the second is far more nebulous as it exists more in what is LACKING than what is there. the anomalous ‘real’ “oh actually this was just a studio being either programming/writing lazy or like. genuinely just bizzare on a spiritual level”. skyrim romance is roughly egalitarian in implementation but there is effectively 0 external queers aside from two dead guys on an island and Possibly this one vampire from the morthal quest who seems like shes grooming a child? its a world absent of same-gender relationships but incapable of recognizing the player as anything extraordinary in that respect. romanceable npcs showing attraction to other npcs is rare in general, even, though going back over it in my head my initial presumption of it being completely absent is verifiably false. i think. ANYWAYS this theoretically would also include characters whose textual sexuality CHANGES to match the player character, which -discounting allowances for potential watsonian mischaracterization (i.e. a character being labeled gay by an unreliable commentator in a save in which they end up in a same-gender relationship, and other such things) can show up in really weird ways like ok in stardew valley i’m not actually saying Leah’s ORIENTATION necessarily changes but her ex’s gender specifically changing to match the player is SO FUCKING WIERD WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT. LIKE WHAT IS THAT EVEN IMPLYING?! WHUH?!!?

#ITD MAKE SO MUCH MORE SENSE IF THAT PRICK WAS ALWAYS A MAN #LIKE EVEN ASIDE FROM THE ‘BEING A CONSERVATIV-Y BASTARD’ LOOKING FUCKING *ODD* ON THIS SAPPHIC LADY #WHO’D. NOTICE. #IT TAKES ACTIVELY LESS EFFORT #INSTEAD LEAH USED TO DATE LESBIAN BEN SHAPIRO ITS. SO JARRING ITS OK FOR HER PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIP TO BE WITH A DUDE THATS FINE #oh also theres monika. shes the third type i guess. shes just completely literal about it #<- i actually don’t agree with that tbh i think framing her love for the player as wholly in-line with any practical means of attraction #defeats some of the point of the story. the affection is parasocial to a saddening extent #unable to see into ‘true’ reality shes instead left trying to chase the shadow of ‘the player’ on the wall of the cave #aware of its falsehood but unable to reach any farther past that fourth wall #in the wake of her realization she’s bound to concede any ‘fictional’ preconceptions of attraction just as she abandoned her preconceptions #of her friends. as people. its all just fluff. set dressing. in the way of her TRUE love. her REAL love. #an ultimate reality that supercedes any mere program or line of text that isn’t aware of it #all this despite her actual -both fictional and practical- inability to REALLY interact with reality on reality’s terms #alienated from her own fictitious existence to the point of manipulating it and abusing it in the style of a ‘real’ author #but still left incapable of actually accessing the agency freedom senses indignities and mortality of REALITY #….. SORRY IM A BIT FUCKED UP OVER DOKI DOKI LITERATURE CLUB STILL I UH. HAVE SOME FEELINGS. THERE.