#kunikida barges into his dorm one day when he ‘sleeps in’ past work and finds dazai agressively re-writing another plan for kenji

[osamid]

a head-canon of mind is i think post-oda’s death dazai 100% “doesn’t allow” himself to get attached to people, bc he thinks eventually everything he has will be lost. this manifests in him constantly keeping a persona with everyone he interacts with and never showing true emotional vulnerability.

HOWEVER. i also think that dazai-post-oda’s-death compulsively fills his hours strategizing on how to protect those people he “doesn’t care about” from harm. i’m talking notebooks upon notebooks crowding his dorm filled with data and analysis on the ada and select port mafia members’ strengths and weaknesses, who and what might threaten them, and how he would prevent that threat before it could even happen.

i think dazai believes he’s a curse on everyone he knows, and he has to expend his only asset (his mind) on ensuring he’ll be able to thwart the curse before it ever comes to fruition. because last time he kept someone close to him and damned all the consequences, they died.

#kunikida barges into his dorm one day when he ‘sleeps in’ past work and finds dazai agressively re-writing another plan for kenji #in case his family is kidnapped and used against him as blackmail take him away from the ada #he never went to sleep the night before. #many of the notebooks are titled [NAME] - Mori #and are exclusively filled of plans he thinks mori would use them in and how he’d circumvent them #he’s sooo unwell. just hug the people you care about man. why are you batman. #this is VERY self idulgent btw i’m aware. #however idc this is clone high for classic literature #BTW ‘select mafia members’ doesn’t just mean chuuya. he has ones for akutagawa and gin as well #actually those are some of his longest because he can’t directly interact with them and therefore his plans are more complex #bsd dazai #bsd headcanons #bsd #ango has a couple of notebooks too. btw. if you even care. #my hcs